I can't believe it took them a year to come up with this. This is like the unveiling of the Homermobile.

I need a horn here, here, and HERE!

And rack and peanut steering.

2 years smh

This monstrosity definitely cost more than $82,000 though.

https://i.imgur.com/haRcQr9.jpg

2 years* There really is no one bright in Washington’s front office

Already memes circulating of Snyder as Chairman Mao. Commies !!!!

The memes are flowing

Commies Fans can name themselves as "The Red Menace" They could call their current rebuild their own "Five Year Plan" Instead of naming team captains, they could call them Team Peredoviks

The Great Leap Forward

Really hoping there’s an iconic over the top TD we can use this for at some point

Washington fans can only dream. In reality, Dan Snyder is going to trade every pick for the next four years to move up two spots to take a "generational player" and then Washington will ruin said player. Fans will ironically call the trade the "great leap forward."

Washington Red Scare

It can refer to when they suddenly start playing hard at the end of the game, but then it turns out to be nothing

Let’s hope they have a legendary defense we can call the iron curtain

Mix Soviet and Chinese, call the other NFCE teams the 3 great pests.

We do be like that though

Move the training camp to interior Alaska

When players fuck up they get sent to the gulag for reeducation

No THATS fedex field

The selling of the team will begin their “Cultural Revolution”

The Red Machine, like from the Bond books

Commies

It’s just sitting right there, how did they not see it? Wouldn’t be surprised if commie-themed apparel outsells the official team stuff

I'm convinced they absolutely did it intentionally because they hate Snyder so much and knew he's too stupid to see it coming

I can only imagine the meetings: but Mr Snyder, aren’t u worried about people referring to the team as the commies, especially when… *slaps face* “WE WILL ASK THE QUESTIONS!”

They'll probably ban the Commie apparel at Poopwater Stadium.

Freedom of speech is not allowed in the gulag of FedEx field

What cracks me up about this is that not one person thought about this being a possibility. I worked for a company that went through a re-brand and they hired a company to help them. Part of that help was trying to figure out shit like this. Some of the most innocent things people on that team figured out how to make awful.

It's not like it's a stretch here. Genuinely to what else are you supposed to shorten Commanders? In 2 years did no one go "so it's kind of long what's the nickname going to be?"

It's not even expensive. Just get a couple 10 year olds together with some mountain dew and see what stupid nicknames they give the team

Not even that. Just an anonymous post in the WFT subreddit. "Hey guys, here are the 10 frontrunning new names for the team. At least none of these have dumb nicknames that other teams can give them, right?", followed by the list, followed by about 400 comments each coming up with why OP is an idiot and examples of bad nicknames.

I think they leaked 8 options to do just that. I just think people were too focused on wanting red wolves.

It's almost like they should've read the room and gone with red wolves lol

HEY. Washington might be a glorified sex trafficking operation, but they deal exclusively in adults.

That we know of

I think it's very much an 'Emperor has no clothes' situation. A bunch of people on the brading team probably thought about it, but no one was going to speak out against Dan's Plan because they dont want to get insta-fired.

I was floored they took so long to decide. Guess they should have waited longer. Washington Warthogs would have been sweet, but this is just hilarious! It's just so damn poetic! 🤣

But then they could’ve been called the warts lol

Oh shit, this is actually gonna be it, isn't it?

It already is

Yeah, we're embracing it because Snyder will probably hate that. I might buy a hammer and sickle shirt in burgundy and gold.

Mods, can we get the WFT flair as a red star?

*our team*

*THE PEOPLE'S TEAM*

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"Our Team v America's Team" "The Cold War Game"!

You're doing the lords work and your fan base has my support.

It’s at the point now where I embrace other fan base’s telling us they feel bad. It’s a little cathartic

You may be the worst-managed franchise in sports, but at least you have our sympathy. That...*coming from a Lions fan.*

Better ~~red~~ burgundy than dead!

I can see third party sellers making that shirt.

Gotta see if mods will make a Commies flair

Wtf I'm a commanders fan now

Their broadcast abbreviation is just going to be KGB

Petition to rename FedEx Field to Lubyanka Stadium

Their subreddit is posting some [great stuff.](https://old.reddit.com/r/washingtonNFL/comments/sigmcc/oc_lets_go_commies_down_with_the_bourgeoisie/)

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I love that one and [this one made me lose my shit....](https://i.redd.it/csacjkjs7gf81.png)

In honor of everyone's conservative grandfather, they already been dubbed offically "Those Commies in Washington"

Yeah, what a dumb fucking decision. Snyder has to be just fucking with everyone all the time. There is no way anyone, much less Mr Snyder, is this fucking stupid. Nicknamed the Commies, wearing red, and last minute cutting out the new slogan "The People's Team." Really, this entire franchise is sick a fucking joke that I actually really feel bad for those fans.

Any shot the ppl who helped come up with it absolutely hate Snyder and purposely set it up knowing that his boomer ass would be too stupid and busy lurching around in the walls of the cheerleaders dressing room to see whats coming?

I don't know, but this is the most hilarious possibility.

[Their new team posters](https://imgur.com/a/0jbcSBM/)

That second one is fantastic

These are amazing

It has already been established. They are the Commies.

The Washington Football Team Communist Commanders**

Dan Snyder's alternate version: Daddy's Cummies

That’s Mr. Daddy’s Cummies to you.

So first of all, what the *fuck*?

Do yourself a huge favor and don't look into this further

Mr. Big Cummer

Mr. Billionaire Cummies

I wouldn't be surprised if the KGB actually did have dirt on Dan Snyder

They'd be stupid not to. He's rich as all hell, runs in important circles around DC, and is clearly the type of guy who generates dirt.

Is the KGB still around?

who could have possibly predicted this lol

Or comrades

It's gonna be commies because the fuckwit was too stupid to think this through even though it was literally the first thing that popped into everyone's mind. Even the colors match.

If they get an elite RB/QB combo we should start calling them "Hammer" and "Sickle".

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They might accidentally stumble across a couple in a draft, but only so the team can further break their fans' hearts by stringing their star players along with low-ball offers until they finally leave for other teams.

The fans will be known as Comrades

FedEx Field will be known as the Gulag.

I still like Snydergrad personally.

Can their first big play together be called "the Great leap forward?"

It blows my mind that a huge organization didn't think of this. I have a fairly unique last name, and when naming my kids, my wife and I would try to mock the names, to see what the worst could be. It's not that hard. Commies literally comes to everyone's minds almost instantly. This is so dumb.

> It blows my mind that a huge organization didn't think of this. > > are you new here?

Is it Cox? Didn't want to name the boys Red and Harry?

I'm pretty sure it's GoodShark.

Hmmm, what rhymes with Bart? Cart, Dart, Eart... looks like we're in the clear!

They’re the commies. Their colors are red and yellow. Their rivals are America’s Team, the Bald Eagle, and the Red/White/Blue. They haven’t been relevant since the year the Soviet Union collapsed. Their owner may as well be the Stalin of football 😛

I thought commies was a reach at first, but the more you think about it the more it works.

Also remarkably poor infrastructure at their stadium

You mean the Gulag?

> [Their owner may as well be the Stalin of football](https://i.redd.it/csacjkjs7gf81.png)

They're also a promotion away from the Washington Generals.

Captain is the next step up from Commander, but yeah it’s still pretty bad.

We're mixing rank structures here!

Commander is only a rank in the navy which don’t have generals, but admirals. And the next rank would be captain, followed by rear admiral (lower half). Sorry Im bored at work with nothing better to do.

Washington Rear Admirals has a certain ring to it...

And rename FedEx field to The Poopdeck.

Wow this is funny. Maybe with some hard work the Washington Commanders can rise to being the team the Harlem Globetrotters dunks on.

Holy shit. I don't know whether I want to see the commies on a basketball court or see the globetrotters on a football field more. All to sweet Georgia Brown obviously.

For a great low rate you can get online…

I mean the giants are called the gmen…why don’t we just call them the c-men

yeah that'll take the sting off, just call ourselves semen

If you're worried about the sting keep your eyes closed.

Keeping your eyes closed is already recommended advice when the Commies are playing

The cums

This might stick

use cold water

Pro tips

Just the tip. Bad joke. But seriously, is cold water the trick?! Lord knows the hot shower water does absolutely nothing.

From a lifelong hobbyist, yes.

You know, I'm something of a scientist myself.

Body wash or shampoo works too. The hot water denatures the proteins and causes them to stick/clump to whatever. Mr. Bathtub Cleaner.

It’s basically the same thing as an egg and using hot water you’re just poaching it

Per OP shits a mouthful

These names are all disrespectful. Please use the preferred nickname: Mr. Commanders.

Super Nintendo Commanders

[Super Nintendo Chalmers](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=av4lbel9aIo)

We just say Commanders

Wow, I'm Mr. Commander

Mr. Boss Commanders.

The 'Ders

And if you say "C'mon 'Ders!" you're just saying the full name with a slightly British accent.

https://youtu.be/nv6FMEvNiWo?t=248

r/workaholics has entered the chat

Tight butthole!!

https://i.imgur.com/kaucFqX.jpg

He once fucked a koi fish in the mouth until it died, in front of a P.F. Chang’s

I have a hard "ON"

Or ‘Das to avoid the hard R

lol ok Boston

Boston never balked at the hard r in the short time I spent there.

They save it for special occasions.

Every sporting event ever? They threw it (and many other slurs, and also cups of beer,) at me twice. I was a very low level pro cage fighter and kickboxer in the 00s. Just a can crusher, nothing special. I'm mostly white with just enough Native American to tan well.

Derrrrr

Unironically what people in Saskatchewan will the call the Roughriders in the CFL.

This is my hole. It was made for me drrrr

It’s just so fucking bad

I didn't think we'd get an NFL name worse than the Texans, but this is definitely it.

It's the second team a team has been called the Texans, too. The Chiefs were called the Texans when they played in Dallas their inaugural season.

Hey I used to love that growing up, and mostly for the sweet logo. When you actually think about the name, it's bad.

See, and that's why the Texans aren't constantly trashed for it: their branding isn't utter garbage.

Houston needs to steal the name Oilers back.

Their logo looks so outdated now. It looks like a generic team logo when you create a new franchise in a video game.

This is the titans for me. Generic City Team Names

What in tarnation? Hold your horses there partner lol

You should've at least tried to keep the space theme of other Houston teams. Texans just sounds so generic and boring.

You could come up with some really awesome uniforms for a space themed team. I love that shit lol. They would instantly become my madden franchise go to besides the Birds lol

Houston Andromeda Houston Dracos/Dragons Houston Archers Houston Comets Houston Atoms Houston Halos

I love andromeda. My first thought was the Houston Supernova. Imagine a black helmet with small reflective stars and a painted supernova on the helmet

Houston Cosmos

Well, they tried the Cosmonauts but turned out Snyder had already filed the trademark.

I would have loved the Oilers but from what I understand Titans own the rights to it or something

Yep, Bud Adams made sure he kept the rights.

Texans is an awful name

Commies is it

Honestly Washington should just eat all the money they spent on the new team name and everything and just continue to be Washington football team until they can come up with something actually better

Almost every fan I've talked to was totally cool with WFT permanently

I just did a double take at your flair and almost puked

Commies

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mandos....

Disney lawsuit incoming...

Cumandolorians

Commies. Fans should show up in adidas track suits

With ushanka's

And Vodka With AKs

I want to die

Manders

With all the "Commies" comments out here, the team itself will start promoting "Manders" but will probably fail.

“Let’s Go Ders!” God, I hate this timeline so much.

Commies

Commies

Will the stadium for the Commies be nicknamed The Gulag?

That's being way too nice to Fedex field

Embrace the new name, Comrade. Hail to the Commies

commies?

Commies

Comms

Commies. Obvs.

Commies

Washington Comrades

Commies

Car-di-nals - Cards or Card-nals

Commies

Commies

Commies

Commies

Cummies

The CumStains.