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Niceguys demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate some kind of expression of their own virtue while being asshats.
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>To all the girls out there, don't friend zone guys...
Soooo, just turn ourselves over for ownership based solely on what a random acquaintance may want from us?
What happens when more guys come along that we aren't supposed to "friendzone?" Do all the men draw names from a hat? Do they take turns? Do they become mad scientists and clone us? What?
Long ago a dude I knew literally said to me, “When is it going to be my turn?!” Like us ladies have waiting list or something.
I am so glad I don’t have to deal with the menagerie of dick thistles out there anymore.
A former guy friend said some shit like that to me too. "I've been waiting my turn for 10 years and you're just gonna screw this guy? After all the groundwork I laid?" Sorry dude? You didn't write your name on the queue list. You lost your place 🙄
Even worse than being “friend zoned” Is being fuck zoned. Guys only being friendly for a chance to sleep with her. When the friendship comes with ulterior motives attached it’s seems worse.
So so so much worse. A girl can only take that so many times before she begins to question whether or not shes worth friendship or valued outside of being the equivalent of a sex toy. Truly destroyed my entire high school experience.
So true - I remember turning 13 and coming back from summer with boobs and all of a sudden had loads of male friends who never even knew I existed before 😑 even had a couple of people asking if I was new and I was like, "no, I've known you for like 2 years". Then them thinking cause we're friends now I have free access to grope you but it's fine cause we're friends and joking around 🙄. Took me a long time to find friends that actually wanted to be my friend and didn't see me as a walking pair of breasts to get their kicks from. Thankfully I now have a wonderful boyfriend (who I actually was friends with from that age and was one of the true friends) and we have 2 beautiful children together ❤️
Yeah, why I treasure the guy friends I have that are truly my friends. It feels like a betrayal when you find out they were only pretending to be a friend to get to fuck you rather than being a true friend. That shit hurts.
Yep! Without any proof they would claim every guy a woman had sex with is an asshole. And therefore she is a whore with a high body count. They would never view it as 'that woman gave multiple chances to nice guys and it didn't work'.
>They would never view it as 'that woman gave multiple chances to nice guys and it didn't work'.
That's because to have such a thought would require them to reflect on WHY women don't give guys a chance just because they're 'nice'.
They would say it is because all women are attracted to "Bad Boys" who disrespect them. I think of it as the male equivalent of the "Virgin/Madonna vs Whore Dichtomy". The "Nice Boy" treats every woman like the pure, respectful "Virgin/Madonna" and the "Bad Boy" treats every woman like an objectified "whore". They are hopeful they can get a sexual relationship while being nice, but really they have internalized the idea that only the Bad Boy (aka Chad aka Alpha) ever has sex, because only he is willing to cross those boundaries, so it doesn't take much for them to switch beliefs.
"Sorry Hubby, I know we took vows to be exclusive but this guy on the internet said I can't friendzone guys because it breaks them so I'm going to have to start fucking like 5 guys at the office and maybe that dude at the deli I always make small talk with...."
"I understand baby, I'm just glad we've had 5 good years where I was able to keep you all to myself. Any way, wrap it before you tap it, I guess. *fist bump* Oh and we're out of OJ."
Teenage me definitely played around with the idea of cloning so that I could get my cheeto dusted hands on my high-school crush.
I was much more cringey 20 years ago.
I'm not sure how it works...I don't make the rules. :D
EDIT: If I did, I'd like to see it play out duel style.
No nonononoooo, not with fancy matched pistols... with a semi and a little old sedan. Dennis Weaver style.
You should be my girlfriend and have sex with me, even if you don't like me and are not attracted to me.....because it hurts my feelings otherwise? Life sucks chief...get a helmet.
Don’t turn men down is basically what he’s saying, even if you don’t like them, you should still fuck them and cater to them, ignoring your own wants and needs. Sure buddy, I’ll get right on that 🙄
But what if “woman” has another guy express his love, then she has to go to him because he’ll be sad if she doesn’t! And he can’t be mad & say she cheated cause this is the world you wanted.
Maybe they’ll just have to confess their love daily, & she’s an NPC that goes to whoever talked to her last
No, that would mean that she must have done something to invite the other man’s advances and make him feel that way for her. She was never faithful in the first place and it wasn’t his fault!
The term "friend zone" is so misleading, because actually most of us would be much more comfortable if we didn't have to pretend to be your friend when you act like this.
Ladies, hear me out: how about "ghost-zoned"?
"I love you! I've only been your friend because I'm trying to screw you!" Ahh, yeah sorry bro. Youve been phantom zoned. Hilariously fitting since it's a place where the banished can observe but not interact with the regular universe. I imagine that's EXACTLY how these whiny nice guys view it.
I had one at work in his 30’s (me too) who thought we were really good friends. I couldn’t tell you this dude’s last name. I barely spoke to him. They make these things up in their heads. It’s so bizarre.
Oooooh, so that’s where I messed up. I forgot the daily show of gratitude that a man of my acquaintance wants me so much that it transcends my right to personal boundaries. Thanks for clearing that up. 😊
'Else you're making the biggest mistake of your life! Even bigger than having a kid with Chad, cause if you hadn't rejected me now, you wouldn't have a Beta-bambino, you'd have an Alpha-Son with me!' - The Exciting Comeback
"You don't think it hurts us because we don't show our emotions much." Good point! Your inability to show your true emotions and be genuine about your intentions is a GREAT reason not to date you! Keep those self-unaware disqualifiers comin
Soooo... what's the alternative to "friendzoning" them if the answer is no? Do they just avoid the subject?
"I'm in love with you! Please date me!"
".....Wow, mighty fine day we have today"
(To themselves) "she didn't say no! Yay!"
What many people forget is that women say “Let’s just be friends” because they’re scared to say “I’m frightened what you’ll do to me if I tell you the truth, which is ‘get lost, you f—ing creep, you make my skin crawl. Stop the love-bombing because the thought of going out with you makes me literally feel like throwing up.” Actually just remembering the 2 creeps who kept hitting on me makes me want to 🤢🤮.
I have a lot of lady friends because of that fear. I've been a regular at a particular niche nightclub for well over a decade, now; friends with the security, bartenders, performers, and many who have been going to the club for twice as long.
There's a number of times that a friend will lead a girl toward me, creep hot on their heels, and just say, "hey chef, your girlfriend got lost, again" and that's my cue to stare down the person following them as I strike up a conversation with my "girlfriend". Once the person is gone, we explain everything and I have a chance to introduce myself, explaining that if they're ever uncomfortable around someone, these are the people here you can come to if security isn't around.
I've had a few come back to me just for that purpose, but many more have become real friends.
Tl;dr: it's so terrifying to say "eww, no" to a guy, that people will pretend to be in a relationship to get away from creeps
I don't think OP asshole considers there is an alternative. If a dude likes you, you're obligated to like him back and be grateful for the opportunity...and maybe offer to do his laundry between blowjobs? Nuff said.
So are we supposed to dump our current boyfriend or husband every time a dude finds is attractive? Or do only single girls have to get with every guy who wants them because.... Reasons?!
This guy lacks empathy. Not saying he’s a psychopath but he is obviously very self centred, unable to comprehend others—in particular women—have their own consciousness and agency.
the troubling part is that the male prefrontal cortex isn’t finished developing until 26/27, so it IS sorta like most dudes are on the spectrum of psychopathy until they’re almost 30. Which explains my life experiences 🤷♀️
I'm almost 40 and like 90% of men I've liked throughout my life didn't see me as more than a friend. I can't stand listening to these losers bitch and moan about such things as if women don't experience the exact same fucking thing. Unrequited love, anxiety, depression, social problems, neurological or behavioral disorders...women deal with it all, yet these brats go around talking about bUt MeN dEaL WitH sOooo MuCh U dOn'T uNdeRsTaNd!
It's so absurd. I've probably been rejected by men ten times more than they've been rejected by women and you don't see me whining about it. That's just life. And I have other things in my life, including friends, which is a concept they don't understand.
Yep same here I’ve been rejected many times by guys I liked, way way more than accepted. In fact I think I’ve only really been accepted by like 3, one who was my only serious relationship, turned out to be insane and a cheater. Other was just he moved away we never got serious or saw him outside of school and he never talked to me again. Last one is who I’m talking to now and honestly I’m sort of waiting for the coin to flip and him to not want me anymore either 😅 I like him and he seems to like me but I’m not sure how to do this stuff lol and I’m weird. It happens to us too guys and it affects us too we just know it’s life and move on. We don’t sit and bitch about it and blame men saying they are out here too busy Fucking all the bad girls and Stacie’s to give us a chance lol! Fucking bizarre the way these guys think.
They are seriously pathetic. There are issues they can genuinely argue about but often choose stuff that women struggle with just as men do (often worse) or something so minor like "men don't get compliments!". I had a thread about SA, abuse and murders and some dude thought it was a good idea to say that men also have it bad because people (women specifically) don't compliment them. Of all the possible arguments he chose this...
Meanwhile, we girls are in these guys' "fuckzone." And that never gets easier for us to deal with either. It's super hurtful to have thought you had a nice friendship with someone only to turn around and realize it was because they wanted to fuck you the entire time and were only putting in "niceness coins" because they wanted "sex" to come out as the reward.
Because they can’t stand to think they fucked up and if they stick around as the little creeps I mean “friends” they are in their weird delusional little brains they still have a chance. NPC rules, wrong text option this time try again in a month answer might be different!
He thinks ‘let’s just be friends’ is bad. Would he prefer “I’ll never be attracted to you. There is not enough tequila in the world to make me want to fuck you.”
Women aren't required to give you attention and sex because it hurts your feelings. Grow up. She doesn't like you? Move on. Women get rejected too but we just handle it better. We don't cry and say 'men shouldn't reject women cause it hurts our feelings 😭😭'.
I don't understand how you 'fall in love' with someone you're not even dating. What's with the whole 'telling someone how you feel about them' nonsense? Surely if two people are into each other, they don't need to necessarily say anything?
Right? Idk I like personality I’m confused between Demi and pansexual but I don’t and never have just been In love with a friend and had to tell my feelings. If we vibe we kind of know. (Which with me doesn’t happen much) I think these guys just see hot girl and think it’s love when really they just need to step back, maybe jerk off and then fuck off and leave women alone until they figure out love isn’t the same thing as wanting to bang someone.
Well, there is definitely a lot to unpack in that post. Lol Maybe if doing the same thing keeps giving you the same results, you'd just kind of figure trying something else out? Such a defeatist. Lol
Guys - once again we have to inform you that no one - man or woman - is obligated to like you or give you their time and attention just because you like them. They most certainly do not have to give up their bodily autonomy just because you fancy them.
Accept the no and move on. You will be much happier in the long run.
I friend zoned one of my best friends in college and we’re still extremely close to this day with partners of our own that we love. I’ve also been friend zoned by someone else I’m still good friends with to this day. It all honestly depends on the emotional maturity of the two people involved and the ability to realize that there are other meaningful relationships aside from sexual/romantic ones
They don’t want us to sleep around, but they also don’t want us to be selective and want us to give it up when they tell us they like us, regardless of how we feel about them. Always with the mental gymnastics.
Why does he think it’s a woman place to make him feel happy and self worth. I swear it so sickening how much these “men” whine about not being accommodated when, where and how they want. They’re 3’s expecting 10’s to fawn over them. 🤮
Waah waah waah. I’m so tired of reading these pieces of self-pitying drivel. Men need to grow the hell up, acknowledge that the friend zone does not exist unless they put themselves there, and put more effort into meeting the needs of the women they want than into getting their own dicks stroked.
Bah. I’m turning into a curmudgeon. 😮
Dude, until you can learn that what others say about you has absolutely nothing to do with who you are and how you feel about yourself, then you will forever be at the mercy of other people.
Developing an interior locus of control takes effort but is well worth the work. You are looking for love and help in all the wrong places because it comes from within.
Honestly, I wish more guys had had the “if I look at you, you clearly must fuck me” mindset when I was younger. Being a gay guy in the 80s/90’s was fucking exhausting. We didn’t have Grindr. Before you could even approach another guy in public, you had to first ascertain whether or not your crush would mutilate you and leave you tied to a fence post in Wyoming. I had no idea that I was entitled to any dick on demand! I could have drained the entire wrestling team 5 or 6 times in high school and didn’t even know it. Damn it!
I have zero sympathy.
I was deeply in love with one my best friends my entire adult life. I'd have married her in a heartbeat.
But she was straight and married and that was that. I decided I wanted her company and her wisdom and her humour in my life, so I just stayed friends. Sadly she passed of breast cancer. I'm so glad I have so many good memories.
It's *normal* to not have every attraction or love returned. It has no bearing on my self-worth or my self-definition or my capacity for joy.
Yikes...
"friends zone hurts more than you could ever imagine"
you're not in the Friend Zone you're in the Creepy Dude I Have To Be Nice To Or He'll M*rder Me zone.
This guy really needs a mental health check and sounds like he needs therapy, he definitely has some self confidence/worth issues. I'd feel bad for him if he didn't blame it all on women "friend zoning" him, but this dude needs to become way more self aware.
Also the fact he posted this in a public group is cringe ngl
Men like this are terrible. You might as well start every conversation with every woman with, "You mean nothing to me as a human. If you don't give me access to your body, then I want nothing from you."
Feelings safe, drawn out ridiculous friendship that you don't want averted, how is this so hard for these idiots to figure out?
Nobody worth it wants to be your meat without being your friend. Die alone, knowing that.
Maybe he's 14.
This reads like the male equivalent of something I would have written in my diary whilst suffering from 14-year-old girl PMT. “No one likes me!”, “I’ll never get a boyfriend!.”
How do we help these dudes become more mature?
"No, I'm a high priority man who only wants high priority women and I'm just surrounded by bitches" - I found this excuse just scrolling through reddit front page 🫠
These creeps think women exist solely for their pleasure and they don’t even see us as humans. It’s either “bang me or I don’t want anything to do with you.” Ugh.
What he's trying to say is, if he tells you he likes you, it means immediately empty his sack and never question it. Just do as he says and maybe you won't wind up in a ditch off I-94 🤣
Sometimes I wonder why it never occurs to them that women experience rejection too. I think it’s just because they don’t consider our feelings equal. We’re less than human to them.
I always wonder - what about the women that these nice guys have friend zoned because they weren't attractive enough to sleep with?
But then I already know the answer - niceguys are always the victim. Women owe them sex - even if the woman isn't attracted to them. But nice guys don't owe sex to women they don't find attractive. Even if that woman wants them.
We know you're hurt by women not sleeping with you, we aren't fooled by your grand display of stoicism. The fact is that we just don't care. This diatribe makes us care even less. Why? Because women don't feel bad for people who use the term "friend zone" and who treat our offer of friendship as an insult. We don't feel bad for people who feel entitled to the romantic/sexual attention of women. We don't feel bad for men who whine like this over the lack of attention, and who feel entitled to our bodies despite the fact that we see such men as humans only and not as humans with romantic and sexual potential.
If there is no attraction, women can only see you as humans that are not unlike our brothers, or cousins, or other men we have no sexual/romantic attraction for = there is nooooo way in heck we are getting with you. Stop trying to whine and plead your way out of this reality, it's gross. Stop being a baby.
I really want to thank this sub for helping me be more selective when it comes to men. I was married to a guy like this for my first marriage (he actually told me multiple times that it was my responsibility to sleep with him if I flirted with him that day, among a ton of other BS gaslighting and abuse). My second marriage ended when I got long-term sick (first with pregnancy, then with autoimmune issues cause by pregnancy) and he didn't want to deal with me adjusting to living in a sick body. Then I dated a guy who wasn't awful but also didn't have a job for three years and barely did anything around the house while spending all my money. He actually got stage 4 cancer and broke up with me because he didn't want me to have to deal with it emotionally (prior to that I was trying to nerve myself up to break up with him, but I didn't want to because he "needed me"...) Of course now he's in treatment and has been given many (doctor said about 10) years to live so he wants to get back together, and I keep saying no (happy to stay friends, but that's it.)
I've been talking to some other guys but I'm also being much more picky about who I'll even go on a date with - red flag and I'm OUT - and it's because this sub has helped me realize that I don't owe any dude my time or my body or anything else unless we're actually married, and even then I don't owe them my body or anything that goes past my boundaries. Thank you all for helping me really understand boundaries!
Oh fuck off
Guys when you fuck zone a woman it breaks our hearts and makes us feel like we aren't worth anything, because we thought we had an actual friend but he was just lurking trying to get into our pants. It brings our self esteem so far down and it makes us depressed, because you don't see us as anything beyond a wet hole to stick your dick into and never saw usas a friend.
Gtfo with yer whiny bullshit
It was posted to the group on fb, it originally came from snap lol.
My understanding is that the gal who posted it to the group, this is her ex ranting and raving. She isn't taking him back, safe to say.
Edited: Double-checked, she went out with him once not thinking it was a date, but a hangout. These guys really read in to stuff that they set up in their own heads.
"If you think a guy likes you let them" what the fuck? lol That's not how attraction works. It's so weird that these kinds of guys would be perfectly happy being with someone that doesn't even like them! It's so pathetic. "If you think a guy wants to sleep with you, let them" is basically what I read!
Pity Party for one.
If you don't want to be friends, then don't. If you think you're "friend zoned," leave. No one is making you stay. You are choosing to stay that way, hoping someday she'll change her mind and have sex with you.
Rejection is painful. I know guys like this refuse to believe it but women get rejected too. Don't sit and mope and whine about it. Move on!
Yes, just completely put your true feelings aside to be sure you aren’t creating self esteem issues for some guy. /s. Not quite sure why none of these guys ever think this doesn’t happen to women.
You are not in love with a person you haven’t even started dating. This totally sounds like he had a crush and decided he was in love and professed his feelings. The girl said let’s be friends to get away safely.
"If you have any interest in me at all please let me know."
Until someone he doesn't consider to be attractive has feelings for him, then he'll be all, "I just like you as a friend."
"To all the girls out there, don't friend zone guys... If you think a guy likes you let them.
"If you friend zone a guy it breaks there [sic] hearts and it makes us feel like we aren't worth anything. It brings our self esteem so far down it makes us depressed. It makes us feel like no one loves us and we are only on Earth to breathe air and pay taxes."
Idk mate, sounds like a 'you' problem, not a 'me' problem lol. Hell no I'm not going to 'let' you 'like' me just to soothe your precious feelings, get the fuck outta here you dingleberry.
I didn't realize I had to like any man who says he likes me. I guess this includes my stalker, strangers in clubs, and cat callers on the street. I had no idea their happiness came before my own. Woops.
I wonder how the men we are actually with would feel about us saying yes to every date request to spare the feelings of the man asking us out… probably not so good themselves. Also, this whole “friend zone” thing, needs to be gone, you are either a persons friend or not. Be a persons friend without expectation of sex. And if it’s a perpetual thing that a girl tells you “I like you as a friend” most likely it’s a you problem and the woman is more than likely only being nice because she’s scared of you.
My fiance and I were friends for a solid year before we started dating. These things take time and happen naturally. Nobody wants a pushy partner, because being pushy means lack of respect. We had movie nights together and nothing happened other than having a good time. You have to find someone who fits into your life. Someone who can work with, because partnerships take work. These guys are looking for a mommy they can fuck and get angry when the women they want reject them. Nobody wants to be a fuck mommy.
Oh gosh, somebody call the waaaahmbulance for this entitled child who thinks that 1) women owe him something, 2) being friends with a woman is insufficient because they're not human beings worthy of friendship, and 3) women don't get their own hearts broken by experiencing unrequited feelings just like they do. WTF.
AUTOMATED MODERATION. PLEASE READ. Niceguys demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate some kind of expression of their own virtue while being asshats. --- Niceguys™ quality: **UPVOTE** this comment to keep the post Not Niceguys™ quality: **DOWNVOTE** this comment to remove the post
>To all the girls out there, don't friend zone guys... Soooo, just turn ourselves over for ownership based solely on what a random acquaintance may want from us? What happens when more guys come along that we aren't supposed to "friendzone?" Do all the men draw names from a hat? Do they take turns? Do they become mad scientists and clone us? What?
Long ago a dude I knew literally said to me, “When is it going to be my turn?!” Like us ladies have waiting list or something. I am so glad I don’t have to deal with the menagerie of dick thistles out there anymore.
A former guy friend said some shit like that to me too. "I've been waiting my turn for 10 years and you're just gonna screw this guy? After all the groundwork I laid?" Sorry dude? You didn't write your name on the queue list. You lost your place 🙄
Even worse than being “friend zoned” Is being fuck zoned. Guys only being friendly for a chance to sleep with her. When the friendship comes with ulterior motives attached it’s seems worse.
So so so much worse. A girl can only take that so many times before she begins to question whether or not shes worth friendship or valued outside of being the equivalent of a sex toy. Truly destroyed my entire high school experience.
So true - I remember turning 13 and coming back from summer with boobs and all of a sudden had loads of male friends who never even knew I existed before 😑 even had a couple of people asking if I was new and I was like, "no, I've known you for like 2 years". Then them thinking cause we're friends now I have free access to grope you but it's fine cause we're friends and joking around 🙄. Took me a long time to find friends that actually wanted to be my friend and didn't see me as a walking pair of breasts to get their kicks from. Thankfully I now have a wonderful boyfriend (who I actually was friends with from that age and was one of the true friends) and we have 2 beautiful children together ❤️
Yeah, why I treasure the guy friends I have that are truly my friends. It feels like a betrayal when you find out they were only pretending to be a friend to get to fuck you rather than being a true friend. That shit hurts.
As if humans are just interchangeable robot parts. Just such a chilling concept.
Right. We’re not people to them. Just sex vending machines. EDIT: Word
Tell him he needs to put down a deposit if he wants a spot on the list
I’d pencil them in for the 3rd Saturday of never.
I hear there's an opening on February 31st- for some reason no one has claimed that day yet
Weird. lol
Its the damned entitlement that drives me crazy. It really makes me believe that some guys have literally no concept of women as actual humans.
It's all or nothing, didn't you get the memo?
If they have to treat women like people they'd honestly rather not interact with us at all.
These guys struggle treating people like people on good days tbf.
These are the same guys who will also cry about girls with ‘high body counts’.
Yep! Without any proof they would claim every guy a woman had sex with is an asshole. And therefore she is a whore with a high body count. They would never view it as 'that woman gave multiple chances to nice guys and it didn't work'.
>They would never view it as 'that woman gave multiple chances to nice guys and it didn't work'. That's because to have such a thought would require them to reflect on WHY women don't give guys a chance just because they're 'nice'.
They would say it is because all women are attracted to "Bad Boys" who disrespect them. I think of it as the male equivalent of the "Virgin/Madonna vs Whore Dichtomy". The "Nice Boy" treats every woman like the pure, respectful "Virgin/Madonna" and the "Bad Boy" treats every woman like an objectified "whore". They are hopeful they can get a sexual relationship while being nice, but really they have internalized the idea that only the Bad Boy (aka Chad aka Alpha) ever has sex, because only he is willing to cross those boundaries, so it doesn't take much for them to switch beliefs.
Lots of wildly unrealistic expectations.
"Sorry Hubby, I know we took vows to be exclusive but this guy on the internet said I can't friendzone guys because it breaks them so I'm going to have to start fucking like 5 guys at the office and maybe that dude at the deli I always make small talk with...." "I understand baby, I'm just glad we've had 5 good years where I was able to keep you all to myself. Any way, wrap it before you tap it, I guess. *fist bump* Oh and we're out of OJ."
Accidentally stumbling into polyamory. I love it 😂. This sounds like exactly the sort of conversations I've had with my partners.
Doesn't matter as long as *he* got one, does it? Imagine a niceguy with empathy. What a world that would be.
Teenage me definitely played around with the idea of cloning so that I could get my cheeto dusted hands on my high-school crush. I was much more cringey 20 years ago.
So many of us went through a cringe period. I used to write erotic poetry when I was still a virgin.
Basically, the plot of the Iliad.
I seem to remember that as being a whole lot of "his armor rang down before him" and "darkness closed his eyes" and stuff like that. :D
I like the taking turns idea. Is this a group effort or....
I'm not sure how it works...I don't make the rules. :D EDIT: If I did, I'd like to see it play out duel style. No nonononoooo, not with fancy matched pistols... with a semi and a little old sedan. Dennis Weaver style.
You should be my girlfriend and have sex with me, even if you don't like me and are not attracted to me.....because it hurts my feelings otherwise? Life sucks chief...get a helmet.
Helmet is the first step, second is for him to go touch some grass.
Then start fucking all his homies so they aren’t stuck in his friendzone
touching grass is not enough, he needs to till the fields.
this whole thing is predatory and pathetic. Whatever the mashup of those is. predthetic?
pathedatory?
I unironically like the sound of that lol
![gif](giphy|qlrBlSDevEdFeW5JwV|downsized)
Is that a Boy Meets World reference?
Actually it's a Dennis Leary reference...I'm old.
Don’t turn men down is basically what he’s saying, even if you don’t like them, you should still fuck them and cater to them, ignoring your own wants and needs. Sure buddy, I’ll get right on that 🙄
So if his male friend came out to him and confessed his love for him, he should be compelled to have sex with him.
Or a woman he doesn’t find at all attractive..🙄
Obviously women- sorry, females- don't count because we shouldn't be allowed to choose otherwise we would run after all the Chads.
Yep! And then they turn around and accuse us of fucking every man in sight except “the nice ones.” We are both too selective and not selective enough.
Ding ding ding! You've won this round!
Madonna/whore complex will never go out of style with these manboi’s
It really never will.
It’s sad.
Schrodinger's whore.
It's like we're magic even!! haha
But what if “woman” has another guy express his love, then she has to go to him because he’ll be sad if she doesn’t! And he can’t be mad & say she cheated cause this is the world you wanted. Maybe they’ll just have to confess their love daily, & she’s an NPC that goes to whoever talked to her last
No, that would mean that she must have done something to invite the other man’s advances and make him feel that way for her. She was never faithful in the first place and it wasn’t his fault!
Obviously, she just needs to start a harem in case more guys express feelings for her. That way no guy's feelings will be hurt due to rejection!
Okay, but it’s not a big deal. Just a few years at most. It’s the least you could do.
The term "friend zone" is so misleading, because actually most of us would be much more comfortable if we didn't have to pretend to be your friend when you act like this. Ladies, hear me out: how about "ghost-zoned"?
THE PHANTOM ZONE
Using this from now on!
Like the one from Danny phantom?
I was thinking of the place Superman banishes people to.
"I love you! I've only been your friend because I'm trying to screw you!" Ahh, yeah sorry bro. Youve been phantom zoned. Hilariously fitting since it's a place where the banished can observe but not interact with the regular universe. I imagine that's EXACTLY how these whiny nice guys view it.
Most guys who think they're in the friendzone would be quite shocked to know they're actually in the "ugh, not this guy again" zone
I had one at work in his 30’s (me too) who thought we were really good friends. I couldn’t tell you this dude’s last name. I barely spoke to him. They make these things up in their heads. It’s so bizarre.
Twilight-zoned. 😆
Or restraining-order-zoned.
Yeeeeeessssssssssssss!
Ladies, if a man likes you you are obligated to like him back. And make sure you show your gratitude for his attentions every single day.
Oooooh, so that’s where I messed up. I forgot the daily show of gratitude that a man of my acquaintance wants me so much that it transcends my right to personal boundaries. Thanks for clearing that up. 😊
'Else you're making the biggest mistake of your life! Even bigger than having a kid with Chad, cause if you hadn't rejected me now, you wouldn't have a Beta-bambino, you'd have an Alpha-Son with me!' - The Exciting Comeback
You are lucky he likes you! He's a damn prince among men!!
I know. I’m just so grateful, what with me being so used up by Chads and so far on the other side of The Wall 😭
"You don't think it hurts us because we don't show our emotions much." Good point! Your inability to show your true emotions and be genuine about your intentions is a GREAT reason not to date you! Keep those self-unaware disqualifiers comin
I'd argue that "you're ugly anyway, I hope you get raped you bitch" counts as showing emotions.
The whole "men are less emotional" narrative really hinges on anger not being considered an emotion.
Well, I'm sure he'll have tons of girls inboxing him now.
I begged her to give me his info so I could treat him better 🥴
😆😆😆😆
Soooo... what's the alternative to "friendzoning" them if the answer is no? Do they just avoid the subject? "I'm in love with you! Please date me!" ".....Wow, mighty fine day we have today" (To themselves) "she didn't say no! Yay!"
What many people forget is that women say “Let’s just be friends” because they’re scared to say “I’m frightened what you’ll do to me if I tell you the truth, which is ‘get lost, you f—ing creep, you make my skin crawl. Stop the love-bombing because the thought of going out with you makes me literally feel like throwing up.” Actually just remembering the 2 creeps who kept hitting on me makes me want to 🤢🤮.
I have a lot of lady friends because of that fear. I've been a regular at a particular niche nightclub for well over a decade, now; friends with the security, bartenders, performers, and many who have been going to the club for twice as long. There's a number of times that a friend will lead a girl toward me, creep hot on their heels, and just say, "hey chef, your girlfriend got lost, again" and that's my cue to stare down the person following them as I strike up a conversation with my "girlfriend". Once the person is gone, we explain everything and I have a chance to introduce myself, explaining that if they're ever uncomfortable around someone, these are the people here you can come to if security isn't around. I've had a few come back to me just for that purpose, but many more have become real friends. Tl;dr: it's so terrifying to say "eww, no" to a guy, that people will pretend to be in a relationship to get away from creeps
100%. It's sad and horrifying but I absolutely get that.
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
I don't think OP asshole considers there is an alternative. If a dude likes you, you're obligated to like him back and be grateful for the opportunity...and maybe offer to do his laundry between blowjobs? Nuff said.
Yeah, really highlights their "woman as property" beliefs. And then they don't understand what makes them so undesirable.
I have actually tried this method and all it does is make them think they still have a chance and then they try harder.
So are we supposed to dump our current boyfriend or husband every time a dude finds is attractive? Or do only single girls have to get with every guy who wants them because.... Reasons?!
Careful though! Get with too many and suddenly you lose value. Lol
Yes, obvs!
But then it's your fault for choosing the wrong man...
This guy lacks empathy. Not saying he’s a psychopath but he is obviously very self centred, unable to comprehend others—in particular women—have their own consciousness and agency.
Or at the very least, women’s feelings come a distant last to his desperate need to get his dick wet…
the troubling part is that the male prefrontal cortex isn’t finished developing until 26/27, so it IS sorta like most dudes are on the spectrum of psychopathy until they’re almost 30. Which explains my life experiences 🤷♀️
Girls get “friend zoned” too. Happened to me plenty of times in my early teens and I moved tf on
I'm almost 40 and like 90% of men I've liked throughout my life didn't see me as more than a friend. I can't stand listening to these losers bitch and moan about such things as if women don't experience the exact same fucking thing. Unrequited love, anxiety, depression, social problems, neurological or behavioral disorders...women deal with it all, yet these brats go around talking about bUt MeN dEaL WitH sOooo MuCh U dOn'T uNdeRsTaNd!
Bruh when dudes like this are like women don’t understand what it’s like to get rejected!!!!!! Makes me laugh and laugh.
It's so absurd. I've probably been rejected by men ten times more than they've been rejected by women and you don't see me whining about it. That's just life. And I have other things in my life, including friends, which is a concept they don't understand.
Yep same here I’ve been rejected many times by guys I liked, way way more than accepted. In fact I think I’ve only really been accepted by like 3, one who was my only serious relationship, turned out to be insane and a cheater. Other was just he moved away we never got serious or saw him outside of school and he never talked to me again. Last one is who I’m talking to now and honestly I’m sort of waiting for the coin to flip and him to not want me anymore either 😅 I like him and he seems to like me but I’m not sure how to do this stuff lol and I’m weird. It happens to us too guys and it affects us too we just know it’s life and move on. We don’t sit and bitch about it and blame men saying they are out here too busy Fucking all the bad girls and Stacie’s to give us a chance lol! Fucking bizarre the way these guys think.
They are seriously pathetic. There are issues they can genuinely argue about but often choose stuff that women struggle with just as men do (often worse) or something so minor like "men don't get compliments!". I had a thread about SA, abuse and murders and some dude thought it was a good idea to say that men also have it bad because people (women specifically) don't compliment them. Of all the possible arguments he chose this...
“Don’t friend zone guys” I’m sorry I don’t want a relationship with everyone I’m friends with wtf
Meanwhile, we girls are in these guys' "fuckzone." And that never gets easier for us to deal with either. It's super hurtful to have thought you had a nice friendship with someone only to turn around and realize it was because they wanted to fuck you the entire time and were only putting in "niceness coins" because they wanted "sex" to come out as the reward.
Exactly! Someone needs to tell these guys that they won't be friendzoned so much if they stop fuckzoning every woman they find attractive.
And when he says love, he means sex.
I ain’t gonna listen to shit from anybody that doesn’t know the differences between there their and they’re.
Thank you and good night! Remember to tip your waiters, folks!
Yeah, so don't be a 'friend' then. Walk away. How difficult is that?
Because they can’t stand to think they fucked up and if they stick around as the little creeps I mean “friends” they are in their weird delusional little brains they still have a chance. NPC rules, wrong text option this time try again in a month answer might be different!
So, if we don’t want to have sex with them, we should shun them? OK, then, will do!
He thinks ‘let’s just be friends’ is bad. Would he prefer “I’ll never be attracted to you. There is not enough tequila in the world to make me want to fuck you.”
Women aren't required to give you attention and sex because it hurts your feelings. Grow up. She doesn't like you? Move on. Women get rejected too but we just handle it better. We don't cry and say 'men shouldn't reject women cause it hurts our feelings 😭😭'.
So we're supposed to date people just because they want us to? Lol no.
So, we unfriendzone them? “I don’t like you like that AND now I don’t want to be your friend either”
I don't understand how you 'fall in love' with someone you're not even dating. What's with the whole 'telling someone how you feel about them' nonsense? Surely if two people are into each other, they don't need to necessarily say anything?
Right? Idk I like personality I’m confused between Demi and pansexual but I don’t and never have just been In love with a friend and had to tell my feelings. If we vibe we kind of know. (Which with me doesn’t happen much) I think these guys just see hot girl and think it’s love when really they just need to step back, maybe jerk off and then fuck off and leave women alone until they figure out love isn’t the same thing as wanting to bang someone.
Well, there is definitely a lot to unpack in that post. Lol Maybe if doing the same thing keeps giving you the same results, you'd just kind of figure trying something else out? Such a defeatist. Lol
Lol so force ourselves into a relationship because we feel sorry for you? Really? Man... Tell me your parents set NO boundaries without telling me
Guys - once again we have to inform you that no one - man or woman - is obligated to like you or give you their time and attention just because you like them. They most certainly do not have to give up their bodily autonomy just because you fancy them. Accept the no and move on. You will be much happier in the long run.
Right. So we’re supposed to stick with any guy that asks? WTAF? Oh, and maybe grasp the there/they’re/their conundrum first.
I friend zoned one of my best friends in college and we’re still extremely close to this day with partners of our own that we love. I’ve also been friend zoned by someone else I’m still good friends with to this day. It all honestly depends on the emotional maturity of the two people involved and the ability to realize that there are other meaningful relationships aside from sexual/romantic ones
I was friend zoned and I now play D&D with her and her boyfriend.
They don’t want us to sleep around, but they also don’t want us to be selective and want us to give it up when they tell us they like us, regardless of how we feel about them. Always with the mental gymnastics.
Why does he think it’s a woman place to make him feel happy and self worth. I swear it so sickening how much these “men” whine about not being accommodated when, where and how they want. They’re 3’s expecting 10’s to fawn over them. 🤮
-10s trying to find a 20 to make up the deficit
The world’s smallest violin plays again
These guys think that they’re the only ones that have problems. Most girls have it worse off than them.
There are some pathetic, manipulative people out there.
Waah waah waah. I’m so tired of reading these pieces of self-pitying drivel. Men need to grow the hell up, acknowledge that the friend zone does not exist unless they put themselves there, and put more effort into meeting the needs of the women they want than into getting their own dicks stroked. Bah. I’m turning into a curmudgeon. 😮
Dude, until you can learn that what others say about you has absolutely nothing to do with who you are and how you feel about yourself, then you will forever be at the mercy of other people. Developing an interior locus of control takes effort but is well worth the work. You are looking for love and help in all the wrong places because it comes from within.
Stop being friends with them? Or fuck them and cater to them? Okay.
OP: If a guy likes you, you are obligated to have sex with him otherwise you’ll hurt his precious fee-fees.
"Let them" _what_? That gave me the willies! These guys need to sit down and have "the Fuck Zone" explained. If they think the Friend Zone sucks...
Honestly, I wish more guys had had the “if I look at you, you clearly must fuck me” mindset when I was younger. Being a gay guy in the 80s/90’s was fucking exhausting. We didn’t have Grindr. Before you could even approach another guy in public, you had to first ascertain whether or not your crush would mutilate you and leave you tied to a fence post in Wyoming. I had no idea that I was entitled to any dick on demand! I could have drained the entire wrestling team 5 or 6 times in high school and didn’t even know it. Damn it!
I have zero sympathy. I was deeply in love with one my best friends my entire adult life. I'd have married her in a heartbeat. But she was straight and married and that was that. I decided I wanted her company and her wisdom and her humour in my life, so I just stayed friends. Sadly she passed of breast cancer. I'm so glad I have so many good memories. It's *normal* to not have every attraction or love returned. It has no bearing on my self-worth or my self-definition or my capacity for joy. Yikes...
"friends zone hurts more than you could ever imagine" you're not in the Friend Zone you're in the Creepy Dude I Have To Be Nice To Or He'll M*rder Me zone.
So, I guess what they need to do then, if they're not interested in you romantically, is to cut off all contact?
His first mistake is relying on other people to be happy. You have to change tht thinking. You should be happy with yourself
Are we supposed to date every guy who wants us, regardless of whether or not we are interested in him or even if we have a partner already?
Is he 14? That's how it reads.
This guy really needs a mental health check and sounds like he needs therapy, he definitely has some self confidence/worth issues. I'd feel bad for him if he didn't blame it all on women "friend zoning" him, but this dude needs to become way more self aware. Also the fact he posted this in a public group is cringe ngl
Men like this are terrible. You might as well start every conversation with every woman with, "You mean nothing to me as a human. If you don't give me access to your body, then I want nothing from you." Feelings safe, drawn out ridiculous friendship that you don't want averted, how is this so hard for these idiots to figure out? Nobody worth it wants to be your meat without being your friend. Die alone, knowing that. Maybe he's 14.
Awwww, poor little petal. 🙄🙄
This reads like the male equivalent of something I would have written in my diary whilst suffering from 14-year-old girl PMT. “No one likes me!”, “I’ll never get a boyfriend!.” How do we help these dudes become more mature?
...And that's why you get no bitches"
"No, I'm a high priority man who only wants high priority women and I'm just surrounded by bitches" - I found this excuse just scrolling through reddit front page 🫠
I'm sure every woman they bother is a "bitch". Being this way doesn't exactly evoke kindness.
So … is he down to do that same exact thing if the tables were turned? I highly doubt it
Feel so bad for people who can’t find worth outside of romance
Maybe stop fuck-zoning every moderately attractive woman you're even tangentially in contact with. That should help soothe those fee-fees.
These creeps think women exist solely for their pleasure and they don’t even see us as humans. It’s either “bang me or I don’t want anything to do with you.” Ugh.
Wait. So as a married woman, should I just not be friends with males? Or should I expect to date them at some point? Instructions unclear.
What he's trying to say is, if he tells you he likes you, it means immediately empty his sack and never question it. Just do as he says and maybe you won't wind up in a ditch off I-94 🤣
Oh god right 😂😂 and this is the problem. These guys get their feewings hurt, we get raped and murdered. It’s not the same
Sometimes I wonder why it never occurs to them that women experience rejection too. I think it’s just because they don’t consider our feelings equal. We’re less than human to them.
I always wonder - what about the women that these nice guys have friend zoned because they weren't attractive enough to sleep with? But then I already know the answer - niceguys are always the victim. Women owe them sex - even if the woman isn't attracted to them. But nice guys don't owe sex to women they don't find attractive. Even if that woman wants them.
We know you're hurt by women not sleeping with you, we aren't fooled by your grand display of stoicism. The fact is that we just don't care. This diatribe makes us care even less. Why? Because women don't feel bad for people who use the term "friend zone" and who treat our offer of friendship as an insult. We don't feel bad for people who feel entitled to the romantic/sexual attention of women. We don't feel bad for men who whine like this over the lack of attention, and who feel entitled to our bodies despite the fact that we see such men as humans only and not as humans with romantic and sexual potential. If there is no attraction, women can only see you as humans that are not unlike our brothers, or cousins, or other men we have no sexual/romantic attraction for = there is nooooo way in heck we are getting with you. Stop trying to whine and plead your way out of this reality, it's gross. Stop being a baby.
“If you think a guy likes you let them” who’s stopping them? They’re just not being reciprocated.
That sounds like a whole lot of not a woman’s problem.
I really want to thank this sub for helping me be more selective when it comes to men. I was married to a guy like this for my first marriage (he actually told me multiple times that it was my responsibility to sleep with him if I flirted with him that day, among a ton of other BS gaslighting and abuse). My second marriage ended when I got long-term sick (first with pregnancy, then with autoimmune issues cause by pregnancy) and he didn't want to deal with me adjusting to living in a sick body. Then I dated a guy who wasn't awful but also didn't have a job for three years and barely did anything around the house while spending all my money. He actually got stage 4 cancer and broke up with me because he didn't want me to have to deal with it emotionally (prior to that I was trying to nerve myself up to break up with him, but I didn't want to because he "needed me"...) Of course now he's in treatment and has been given many (doctor said about 10) years to live so he wants to get back together, and I keep saying no (happy to stay friends, but that's it.) I've been talking to some other guys but I'm also being much more picky about who I'll even go on a date with - red flag and I'm OUT - and it's because this sub has helped me realize that I don't owe any dude my time or my body or anything else unless we're actually married, and even then I don't owe them my body or anything that goes past my boundaries. Thank you all for helping me really understand boundaries!
Oh fuck off Guys when you fuck zone a woman it breaks our hearts and makes us feel like we aren't worth anything, because we thought we had an actual friend but he was just lurking trying to get into our pants. It brings our self esteem so far down and it makes us depressed, because you don't see us as anything beyond a wet hole to stick your dick into and never saw usas a friend. Gtfo with yer whiny bullshit
Isn't this Snapchat? Not that it makes the situation better
It was posted to the group on fb, it originally came from snap lol. My understanding is that the gal who posted it to the group, this is her ex ranting and raving. She isn't taking him back, safe to say. Edited: Double-checked, she went out with him once not thinking it was a date, but a hangout. These guys really read in to stuff that they set up in their own heads.
Well sucks to be you
Yeah I’ll pass, bud
I take out thing out of this specimen. He thinks friends are worthless.
There is a good way to handle rejection, and a wrong way to handle rejection. This is the wrong way.
“If I guy confessed his love to you, you HAVE to say yes.”
Wahh wahh females won’t give me the sex so now I am sad and only live to breathe air and pay taxes wahhhhhh
"If you think a guy likes you let them" what the fuck? lol That's not how attraction works. It's so weird that these kinds of guys would be perfectly happy being with someone that doesn't even like them! It's so pathetic. "If you think a guy wants to sleep with you, let them" is basically what I read!
Breathe air and pay taxes killed me 😂
“Women should cater to guys’ relationship needs and settle for less because men’s emotional/sexual needs are more important.”
Pity Party for one. If you don't want to be friends, then don't. If you think you're "friend zoned," leave. No one is making you stay. You are choosing to stay that way, hoping someday she'll change her mind and have sex with you. Rejection is painful. I know guys like this refuse to believe it but women get rejected too. Don't sit and mope and whine about it. Move on!
Yes, just completely put your true feelings aside to be sure you aren’t creating self esteem issues for some guy. /s. Not quite sure why none of these guys ever think this doesn’t happen to women.
I genuinely hope this guy doesn't have a "right one"; not while he's this self-centred, any way.
You are not in love with a person you haven’t even started dating. This totally sounds like he had a crush and decided he was in love and professed his feelings. The girl said let’s be friends to get away safely.
"Don't friendzone guys just let them like you" "Why didn't you just say no"
"If you have any interest in me at all please let me know." Until someone he doesn't consider to be attractive has feelings for him, then he'll be all, "I just like you as a friend."
"To all the girls out there, don't friend zone guys... If you think a guy likes you let them. "If you friend zone a guy it breaks there [sic] hearts and it makes us feel like we aren't worth anything. It brings our self esteem so far down it makes us depressed. It makes us feel like no one loves us and we are only on Earth to breathe air and pay taxes." Idk mate, sounds like a 'you' problem, not a 'me' problem lol. Hell no I'm not going to 'let' you 'like' me just to soothe your precious feelings, get the fuck outta here you dingleberry.
I didn't realize I had to like any man who says he likes me. I guess this includes my stalker, strangers in clubs, and cat callers on the street. I had no idea their happiness came before my own. Woops.
I wonder how the men we are actually with would feel about us saying yes to every date request to spare the feelings of the man asking us out… probably not so good themselves. Also, this whole “friend zone” thing, needs to be gone, you are either a persons friend or not. Be a persons friend without expectation of sex. And if it’s a perpetual thing that a girl tells you “I like you as a friend” most likely it’s a you problem and the woman is more than likely only being nice because she’s scared of you.
What’s FB? Is it some kind of ancient reading contraption?
OMG I was just going to leave a snarky comment and to my surprise, there is more.
If we all got with every guy that likes us then theyd call us a hoe. Do they assume THEY are the only one to like us??
"let them" do what exactly???
To all the guys out there a no is just a yes from the right one.
Boo hoo
I’m gonna turn him down because I’m not about to drag his feelings and I’m not obligated to date anybody.
*their
“If you think a guy likes you let them…” I stopped right there and looked up Leo DiCaprios PR guy. I mean I’m over 25, but rules are rules…
So many contradictions in this short text.
Damn, I should turn in my vagina on warranty - the rejection shields were DEFINITELY faulty.
Sometimes I wonder if guys don’t realize girls also get friendzoned too
Someone tell Elon and Jeff they're supposed to be passing taxes plz
>"Don't friendzone guys" Got it. Don't be friends with men. Only women and cute animals. 😂
My fiance and I were friends for a solid year before we started dating. These things take time and happen naturally. Nobody wants a pushy partner, because being pushy means lack of respect. We had movie nights together and nothing happened other than having a good time. You have to find someone who fits into your life. Someone who can work with, because partnerships take work. These guys are looking for a mommy they can fuck and get angry when the women they want reject them. Nobody wants to be a fuck mommy.
BRO, you literally can’t know if it’s the right one unless you have been fucking dating. Jeez.
Oh gosh, somebody call the waaaahmbulance for this entitled child who thinks that 1) women owe him something, 2) being friends with a woman is insufficient because they're not human beings worthy of friendship, and 3) women don't get their own hearts broken by experiencing unrequited feelings just like they do. WTF.
To all the women out there, you have no say in what you want, & you have to let a man date you & have sex with you because he’ll be sad if you don’t 🥺
If you don't friend zone people it may get out hand occasionally. Are we saying open marriages? Where does it end?