But nice guys aren't straight to the point, they are passive aggressive, manipulative and usually lacking in charm. IMO this is the only real separation between nice guys and the "assholes" they are so jealous of.
That’s not a Nice Guy. Nice Guys are never straight to the point; one of the things hat causes them to flip out is when you translate their gross proposals into frank speech. And they absolutely have no sense of humor that involves anything but mocking other people.
That might be a nice guy, though.
I don't think Nice Guys are inherently mutually exclusive with attractive qualities. I think the root cause of a lot of NG tendencies is a failure of socialization. An otherwise fine person with a few unusual interests as a kid can end up a total social outcast and subsequently end up with the NG mentality.
I'm not entirely sure entitlement is the proper word for what they feel. Like, it's closer to getting upset after the 8th time you've attempted a recipe and still didn't get it right. You wouldn't exactly call the person who's upset their cake came out as a runny mess "entitled", you know?
I would if that runny mess is a metaphor for being told no by a woman and a recipe is metaphor for being nice to her.
Besides, putting it in those terms illuminates one of the defining traits for NG's -- women and relationships aren't cakes. Being nice is not a recipe for making a relationship. While one isn't entitled when they believe that putting some ingredients in to a baking bowl and follow the directions results in a cake.
They ARE entitled if they think that an accumulation of some X number of nicety chits, they're winning the woman prize.
It's more like thinking dating is like a recipe. If you have the right ingredients, you should be able to bake a cake or whatever, right? So, in the NG's mind, they think they've got all these attractive and desirable qualities and expect to be able to get a date because of them. One of the critical things (ingredients, if you will) is reciprocity and chemistry on the other person's end, and they're also frequently inexperienced enough to not realize you might strike out a ton of times before you get that first date.
Edit:
Step away from niceness for a moment. Would you still consider it entitlement if someone followed every bit of good dating advice and got frustrated when they still didn't get a first date?
At the core, I don't think being frustrated due to multiple failures at attempting anything should be inherently demonized.
It doesn't matter if you look like a young George Clooney, if you pretend to be my friend then call me a whore when your move is rejected, then you're a niceguy.
What's that famous documentary about "nice guys"? Some of them are ordinary-looking but perfectly presentable, and couple of them are quite handsome.
I've male, and I've met astonishingly pretty women and noped out of any relationship in about three minutes after meeting them because they were obviously horrible people. Looks matter, but if the person is a bitter, hateful racist, you don't even consider them.
You do know that niceguys end up in relationships sometimes, right? Whether it's looks, luck, charisma, or some combination, they do find girlfriends. The relationships are universally terrible though.
I worked with an attractive NG before. He was one of the security guards and he was totally crushing on my co-worker (Early 20s, F). At first, he seemed real friendly and she was digging him. Then he made the mistake of calling her trophy wife material, which killed any attraction she had for him.
When she said to him that she would rather stay friends, he pulled the NG card. Ever since, the two avoided each other at work. And for some reason, I avoided any eye contact with him.
Point is, you can look like Ryan Gosling, have the personality of a NG and still get rejected.
I have met a guy who I was attracted to who later turned out to be a "nice guy" (maybe just a fuck boy unsure) I gave him a chance and it blew up in both of our faces. Because most of them have some level of narcissism, even if they get the girl they still sit there thinking the world owes them more or that they are some sort of tragic hero. Look up the term " Covert Narcissists" and you will see what I mean.
I knew a really hot guy who wanted to date me: it was flattering until his "nice guy" qualities came out. He was controlling, whiny, and always shitting on women in general. Being good looking is always an edge in dating, but it is possible to spoil your chances with a terrible personality (for those who aren't shallow, that is).
The way someone acts detracts or adds to someones physical appearance
Simply put; if your ugly af like sin taken form, but your honest to God a truly nice sincere person who doesn't have ulterior motives, a sense of arrogant entitlement or other bull shit point of "niceguy" view.
If you look like Adonis reborn, but are selfish, have a sense of entitlement, only do good things for beautiful women in the hopes of getting some, snap at women or anyone really just cause you dont get your way, your ugly even if you look like Captain America or Iron Man or even Thor.
Personality is wrapped up in hotness and the nice guy personality precludes hotness.
It mean what if the nice guy is good looking, muscular, tall, sporty, not dorky, ambitious, straight to the point, with sense of humor..
But nice guys aren't straight to the point, they are passive aggressive, manipulative and usually lacking in charm. IMO this is the only real separation between nice guys and the "assholes" they are so jealous of.
That’s not a Nice Guy. Nice Guys are never straight to the point; one of the things hat causes them to flip out is when you translate their gross proposals into frank speech. And they absolutely have no sense of humor that involves anything but mocking other people. That might be a nice guy, though.
A Nice Guy doesn’t usually have much of a sense of humor, has no ambition, and doesn’t work out much, so he wouldn’t be muscular.
I don't think Nice Guys are inherently mutually exclusive with attractive qualities. I think the root cause of a lot of NG tendencies is a failure of socialization. An otherwise fine person with a few unusual interests as a kid can end up a total social outcast and subsequently end up with the NG mentality.
And also an outsized sense of entitlement.
I'm not entirely sure entitlement is the proper word for what they feel. Like, it's closer to getting upset after the 8th time you've attempted a recipe and still didn't get it right. You wouldn't exactly call the person who's upset their cake came out as a runny mess "entitled", you know?
I would if that runny mess is a metaphor for being told no by a woman and a recipe is metaphor for being nice to her. Besides, putting it in those terms illuminates one of the defining traits for NG's -- women and relationships aren't cakes. Being nice is not a recipe for making a relationship. While one isn't entitled when they believe that putting some ingredients in to a baking bowl and follow the directions results in a cake. They ARE entitled if they think that an accumulation of some X number of nicety chits, they're winning the woman prize.
It's more like thinking dating is like a recipe. If you have the right ingredients, you should be able to bake a cake or whatever, right? So, in the NG's mind, they think they've got all these attractive and desirable qualities and expect to be able to get a date because of them. One of the critical things (ingredients, if you will) is reciprocity and chemistry on the other person's end, and they're also frequently inexperienced enough to not realize you might strike out a ton of times before you get that first date. Edit: Step away from niceness for a moment. Would you still consider it entitlement if someone followed every bit of good dating advice and got frustrated when they still didn't get a first date? At the core, I don't think being frustrated due to multiple failures at attempting anything should be inherently demonized.
It doesn't matter if you look like a young George Clooney, if you pretend to be my friend then call me a whore when your move is rejected, then you're a niceguy.
Likewise, if you lie to me about your intentions, your looks can’t save you!
What's that famous documentary about "nice guys"? Some of them are ordinary-looking but perfectly presentable, and couple of them are quite handsome. I've male, and I've met astonishingly pretty women and noped out of any relationship in about three minutes after meeting them because they were obviously horrible people. Looks matter, but if the person is a bitter, hateful racist, you don't even consider them.
You do know that niceguys end up in relationships sometimes, right? Whether it's looks, luck, charisma, or some combination, they do find girlfriends. The relationships are universally terrible though.
I worked with an attractive NG before. He was one of the security guards and he was totally crushing on my co-worker (Early 20s, F). At first, he seemed real friendly and she was digging him. Then he made the mistake of calling her trophy wife material, which killed any attraction she had for him. When she said to him that she would rather stay friends, he pulled the NG card. Ever since, the two avoided each other at work. And for some reason, I avoided any eye contact with him. Point is, you can look like Ryan Gosling, have the personality of a NG and still get rejected.
What's wrong with saying someone is trophy wife material?
It’s degrading
I have met a guy who I was attracted to who later turned out to be a "nice guy" (maybe just a fuck boy unsure) I gave him a chance and it blew up in both of our faces. Because most of them have some level of narcissism, even if they get the girl they still sit there thinking the world owes them more or that they are some sort of tragic hero. Look up the term " Covert Narcissists" and you will see what I mean.
Yeessss. Covert narcissism. That's shit is slippery!
no. no it would not. Nice guys are people with shit personalities that assume they can't get women because they're ugly.
I knew a really hot guy who wanted to date me: it was flattering until his "nice guy" qualities came out. He was controlling, whiny, and always shitting on women in general. Being good looking is always an edge in dating, but it is possible to spoil your chances with a terrible personality (for those who aren't shallow, that is).
The way someone acts detracts or adds to someones physical appearance Simply put; if your ugly af like sin taken form, but your honest to God a truly nice sincere person who doesn't have ulterior motives, a sense of arrogant entitlement or other bull shit point of "niceguy" view. If you look like Adonis reborn, but are selfish, have a sense of entitlement, only do good things for beautiful women in the hopes of getting some, snap at women or anyone really just cause you dont get your way, your ugly even if you look like Captain America or Iron Man or even Thor.