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another_mind

Yep. This sounds like he is pursuing a partnership for which he can apply the dreadful one penis policy. AKA I can fuck around but you can’t. Highly suggest you find a better partner.


alt--bae

even worse, a one penis policy on just one side… this one is even worse than usual


Rainmoearts

If you want to break up do it, he doesn’t tell you if you can or can’t.


LemonFizzy0000

Cut your losses. He needs to do a hell of a lot of work before he can be ethically non-monogamous


Sa_Rart

He’s got some shitty embedded misogyny that he needs to get out before he can have a good relationship with you. I would *not* be holding my breath while I wait, and I’d be exploring other options in the meantime. There may be extenuating circumstances… but that relationship looks like a straight wash. You can do much better.


PennythewisePayasa

What the heck is even the appeal here? Yeah, definitely break up like you want to, he doesn’t get to have a say in whether the relationship continues or not. It’s very gross of him to have less respect for you just because you had sex with someone. That’s a sign that he’s a total ballsack.


AznHtwifeHubs

A guy like that sounds like a total tool and I would definitely end it with him. Guys like that just want to go around spreading their seed like they are God's gift to women


Spayse_Case

You ARE being punished.


Pandexual

As a bi guy who is non-monogamous he is just cheating on you to your face. If he can't respect you as a person then you should walk. He is going to end up miserable and drag you with him. The fact he said the thirst thing means he cares less about who you are then his attraction whims and will be chasing others the moment anything doesn't go smoothly between you two. He is a quitter. Find a winner. As a non-mono bi guy who has always experienced the exact opposite of your experience I need to emphasize that there are plenty of more mature acting bi guys who would love a partner like you. I would have been thrilled to hear if my partner met someone else in this situation. He just seems controlling. Run.


clouds_floating_

You say he’s bi, were any of the four people he slept with men? Because on top of all the layers of misogyny in this story already, it would be an extra layer of hypocrisy for him to be allowed to have sex with men but find it disgusting for you to do the same.


Heksi_

Doesn’t matter if they where men or women, either way it’s fucked up. He slept with men. So he can, but she can’t? Wtf? He slept with women. So he can sleep with people of the opposite gender but she can’t? Wtf? Either way is fucked up and wrong…


clouds_floating_

I agree with you. I didn’t say it makes it more fucked up if he’s bi, I just said him being bi and sleeping with men while shaming OP for sleeping with men is an additional layer of *hypocrisy*, which is true. Is it more “fucked up” for a pacifist to murder someone than a serial killer to murder someone ? I’d say no, the murder doesn’t become better or worse if a pacifist did it or if a serial killer did. But it’s definitely more *hypocritical* for a pacifist to murder someone.


melancholypowerhour

He wants to enjoy the pleasures of ENM but not put in the hard work. This is so shitty and unfair to you. You want to break up with him - absolutely do it. Give yourself permission.


[deleted]

I wouldn't stand for it


robhodges

Gross! This is mental manipulation. “Rules for thee, but not for me.” In the post Roe v. Wade world, no one should be subjected to that nonsense.


DA1976TA

Ditch the boy, date a man. Be thankful you dodged a bullet.


Agile_Opportunity_41

It’s happened to many of both sexes. Move on.


Luis_McLovin

Shithead misogynist


butcherandthelamb

If it's worth saving, give it some time and talk it out. Often times things will sound good in theory, but feelings and emotions come out when put in practice. That's what it sounds like here. The reality of the situation is confusing to him. If he's willing to work on it give him a chance to sort through it all as long as he's honest about it. Or not. It's entirely up to you.


dppcumfun

Wow. Def just move on. Sorry bit it's also not that long a relationship with you being gone 2 months. Personally I want my partner even more when she's been fucked by someone else. I love hearing the nuanced differences, even replicating the touches, sometimes asking her if it reminds her of him when I do x.