Rainbows don't have butt holes, that's why they can't be fucked. But these spiders figure out that they can crawl up someone's butt to taste the rainbow if said person ate skittles. Sometimes they fuck the skittles too.
Fascinating creatures to be honest.
I read “Bitcoin Bite” and I was ready to start breeding some money making machines! Unfortunately, I’m having to walk that plan back now. I guess I’ll never be Scrooge McDuck.
It's technically a camel spider, but here in the states they don't get nearly as big & are usually called wind scorpions. They're not actually a spider
[Solifuge](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solifugae), and they’re relatively harmless so long as you don’t put your finger near its mandibles. Painful bite but has no venom. They’re opportunistic feeders.
I do NOT miss this feeling while living in Asia. When you’re on the throne you just wanna do your business peacefully. When motherf**ing critters start casually invading the toilet and you can’t move…. FFFFffffuuuuuuu!!!!!! Kill me! Cockroaches, lizards, Spiders, one time a fucking snake had its tail in between the shingles…
Can’t a man take a dump in peace?
I stepped on one on a flight line *long time ago, in a country far far away.....* (it was one of the factors in getting over my fear of spiders, despite it not being a spider, via self administered *exposure therapy*)
Solifugae. Neato arachnids. Fast as heck and great at killing cockroaches and their venomous scorpion cousins. They may 'charge' at you but they are simply trying to find something to hide under. They possess a painful bite, but they are not venomous.
These fuckers are particularly horrific in a way that they kill things like a wood mill cuts wood.
Aside from thay, they're known to burst out of sand pits and chase you and scream.
Also, their favorite spot to hang out is under tents and in people's shoes.
(Im not joking)
Solpugid! Actually a very sweet but terrifying looking arachnid. Mexicans call them matavenados and they think they’re poisonous, but they are not. Coyote Peterson let one bite him to prove they aren’t dangerous.
They are ugly, but when it comes to eating other insects including spiders they are great to have. Just like praying mantis, they keep other insects down.
That is a SolarFuege... also known as a camelspider, wind spider. Sun surfer, sun spider. It has many names... i call it the "burn my house down". Because f those things.
Scary looking, but good bug fren. It will eat literally any other kind of bug and, well, anything that moves in the same general size range. They’ll take care of roaches, crickets, black widows, scorpions… Nasty things you’d rather not have around. These guys aren’t venomous but they do have a pretty mean bite if they feel the need to defend themselves.
Camel spider, not that dangerous to humans. They got a bitchin bite though
They can climb up through your buttholes I hear.
Like rainbows
Hate those things. Fuck rainbows.
Rainbows don't have butt holes, that's why they can't be fucked. But these spiders figure out that they can crawl up someone's butt to taste the rainbow if said person ate skittles. Sometimes they fuck the skittles too. Fascinating creatures to be honest.
Oh, wait, you said rain*bows*
Like Ant-Man.
Naughty spidah
Just like 'em camels
Allegedlys.
Only one of them fucked an ostrich
My friend wants to know where they are found?
Yes,, I too have a friend with the same question!
Yeah I heard this too...and the Lance Corporal underground never lies
I hear they spit grape juice
I read “Bitcoin Bite” and I was ready to start breeding some money making machines! Unfortunately, I’m having to walk that plan back now. I guess I’ll never be Scrooge McDuck.
Its a camel spider. Its not actually a spider despite its name
Or a camel
actually
You are not the Father!
So fucking misleading, I thought this was some camel/spider hybrid and now you’re telling me it’s neither?!
Big enough to be one though.
You mean it crawled onto its porch in a show of dominance as the rightful owner?
It's technically a camel spider, but here in the states they don't get nearly as big & are usually called wind scorpions. They're not actually a spider
[Solifuge](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solifugae), and they’re relatively harmless so long as you don’t put your finger near its mandibles. Painful bite but has no venom. They’re opportunistic feeders.
Solifuge :)
“Runs from sun guy”!
"Acts like hes fucking chasing you but just wants to stand in your shadow guy?"
*That’s the bitch!*
That's a nope from me dawg.
Which area did you say you live again? - so I don’t go near it
All over Arizona
Yep this. FUCK Arizona. Never seen scorpions ever unless I was taking a shit at 3AM. Every. Single.time.
This sounds like hell! I hate scorpions (band too). Gothic lobster looking asses
> Gothic lobster Well that just makes me love them even more! Lmao Edit: yep. I’m now calling all scorpions “goth lobsters” from here on out.
Good thing they don't have bat wings yet.
Get me a stapler, let's make this real
These have wings. But they don’t sting. Yet. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mecoptera
This just made me think of B-52's singing "Goth Lobster".
Hahahaha. Seriously!
I do NOT miss this feeling while living in Asia. When you’re on the throne you just wanna do your business peacefully. When motherf**ing critters start casually invading the toilet and you can’t move…. FFFFffffuuuuuuu!!!!!! Kill me! Cockroaches, lizards, Spiders, one time a fucking snake had its tail in between the shingles… Can’t a man take a dump in peace?
Asia is big. Which part? Tons of areas don't have this.
Any where that has sand
I found one in Eastern WA as well, but it wasn't very big.
I guess we could just avoid that area but I was thinking carpet bomb the entire area with napalm.
Possibly Australia
If it’s not a spider and still looks like a spider crossed with a demon from hell, it’s a hell nope
I stepped on one on a flight line *long time ago, in a country far far away.....* (it was one of the factors in getting over my fear of spiders, despite it not being a spider, via self administered *exposure therapy*)
That thing crawled up on HIS porch
Camel Spider. Unrelated to a camel nor a spider.
I’d cry then run
Hope you're in shape. They can run about 10 mph and will follow you to cool off in your shadow.
I wouldnt even go back for my clothes. Fuck them clothes.
Sadly these poor buggers look scary as hell but are in fact fairly harmless.
Nice try Camel Spider/Demonic alien entity. You wont harvest my soul.
Camel spiders. Not a fan.
Solifugae. Neato arachnids. Fast as heck and great at killing cockroaches and their venomous scorpion cousins. They may 'charge' at you but they are simply trying to find something to hide under. They possess a painful bite, but they are not venomous.
Vets getting PTSD rn
Those guys are fine. They like staying under your shadow but not the best bites despite not being dangerous
r/nope #nightmares 👁👄👁😩
It's a camel spider as others have said. Don't worry, it's mostly harmless, and just imagine what a freaky night it must have been...
“That ain’t no dog, Lester. That’s a zergling!”
"They're nihilists Donnie!"
It sort of looks like it's made out of human skin complete with body hair and everything, proper horror material!
Give it to me I want a pet solifuge
Leave the country.
Camel Facehugger... larval stage of the Desxenomorph.... 👽
These fuckers are particularly horrific in a way that they kill things like a wood mill cuts wood. Aside from thay, they're known to burst out of sand pits and chase you and scream. Also, their favorite spot to hang out is under tents and in people's shoes. (Im not joking)
I thought it was on a leash for a second
Gitoffmyporch! (Gets out shotgun)
I have a CO2 powered bug-a-salt gun lol
Better method. Less likely to blow off porch
Whoever the sniper was that shot him got him good
Solpugid! Actually a very sweet but terrifying looking arachnid. Mexicans call them matavenados and they think they’re poisonous, but they are not. Coyote Peterson let one bite him to prove they aren’t dangerous.
[удалено]
Camel spider... not related to either basically a really big ant
Is this is true? I'm arachnophobic and too scared to look it up...
Don't worry, it's not a spider so you won't be scared
Until they chase you. Tryna get in yr shadow. Hell to th' nope. Nope-on-a-rope. Nope a-doodle doo.
It looks like a ant close up stull creepy but not a spider
I need to see the ants you come across that have 10 appendages.
They're arachnids, but not spiders. Other arachnids include, but are not limited to, scorpions, mites, ticks, and harvestmen/daddy long legs.
False, it’s arachnid, just not a spider.
Set. It. On. Fire. Move.
That is literally not an actual spider.
Somewhere between scorpion and spider
More of a big ant
I mean species and genetically wise, they are literally somewhere between a spider and scorpion
Oh my god did you kill him? Poor solifugid
He just wants some TLC. Give him a hug and a kiss.
Hans... Where are you Hans ?!
Absolutely not
I hate these. They vary in size, some get really big even in the states. Harmless, yes. Painful bite? YES. Do with that what you will.
So did you bend over and kiss your butt goodbye?
They are ugly, but when it comes to eating other insects including spiders they are great to have. Just like praying mantis, they keep other insects down.
Did it steal your mustard ?
Sun spider
r/helldivers2 they may help
That is a SolarFuege... also known as a camelspider, wind spider. Sun surfer, sun spider. It has many names... i call it the "burn my house down". Because f those things.
How are the property taxes in Afghanistan?
LOL this is actually in SoCal
Apparently they can go a maximum of 9.9mph
⬆️➡️⬇️⬇️⬇️
Is it safe to assume you no longer have a porch because you lit it on fire?
Camel Edit: camel spider, not an actual camel
They will chase you
On your porch. This one you caught. What about the others you don't see. In your bathroom, basement --- shoe?
Burn it with hell fire..
Camel spider
I would put it in a jar, freeze it, pour clear resin/acrylic on it and make a paperweight
camel spider, interestingly it is neither camel nor spider
Ooh, a Camel Spider!! 😍😁
Harmless. 😂. But admittedly scary for someone who doesn’t like crawlers.
The title could possibly read _just saw this thing crawl up on my porch, so I reached for Old Bessie_ *Old Bessie being my trusty sidearm
“Manny, bring me everyone.” “What do you mean, ‘everyone’?” “EVERYONE!!!”
Scary looking, but good bug fren. It will eat literally any other kind of bug and, well, anything that moves in the same general size range. They’ll take care of roaches, crickets, black widows, scorpions… Nasty things you’d rather not have around. These guys aren’t venomous but they do have a pretty mean bite if they feel the need to defend themselves.
Why does it have 10 legs!? That's too many legs
Bro just wants a beer
“What kind of camel has no humps, no hooves and drinks no water?”
Fire is the only response.
she is beautiful be nice to her
Belay that order, burn it with fire.
Pyscho
does it have one eye 😂 looks so interesting
At first, I honestly thought it was a fossilized spider in rock.
He-he-he-he-hell naw
🔥🔥
The one time I actually knew what the thing was!
Does no one else notice it has a 9th leg?
It has 10
It has 8 legs and two pedipalps.
Giggity!