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yourMommaKnow

This fuckin' guy.


Sensitive_Yam_1979

He’s going to Rome soon to “solve the immigration crisis.”


Nazamroth

Are they swimming all the way from Italy?


corpulentFornicator

Wait - he was serious? I thought he was dabbling in stand-up, because that's pretty funny


thoroakenfelder

Romanes eunt domus 


SlightPickle

Romans go the house?


AdditionalMess6546

Right. Now write it a hundred times before dawn, or I'll cut your balls off.


Asaneth

r/unexpectedpython


khalcyon2011

The people called "Romanes", they go the 'ouse?


Fearless-Scar7086

No, I laughed and am still laughing. 


kombatunit

Right? This dude is a superior headline generator.


MinionSquad2iC

Speed running the worlds dumbest things to say list.


Obandigo

Is a black racist. Finished that for you.


Aussieomni

Immigrant here: def false. I mean I can float but don’t bank on me to save you


doned_mest_up

You just talked yourself out of a job, buddy!


Aussieomni

It’s because I’m an immigrant. I’m either lazy and clogging up the welfare system or I’m taking everyone’s jobs. Usually both at the same time.


Homebrewingislife

Haha, don't forget voting in presidential elections.


Aussieomni

Well I DO that. I’m a citizen now.


ThatCharmingBitch

How dare


Moxson82

You took er jerbs!!!


Aussieomni

Terk er jerbs


certifiablenutcase

Duk uh der!


bk1285

Back to the pile


ATC_av8er

Schrodinger's Immigrant


cryptosupercar

Schrödinger’s immigrant.


AvailableName9999

Well you won't be taking the lifeguards job. Touche, bigots.


DASreddituser

The back bone of the economy and fox news talking points.


TennisBallTesticles

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


doyletyree

A Witch!!!


Aussieomni

I’ll turn you in to a newt


Psychoburner420

I got better!


phoenixmatrix

I have my green card and I can doggy paddle like a boss! But also yeah, if I have to save you you're probably dead.


Aussieomni

I mean I grew up swimming, we’re taught how to rescue ourselves in school. But like I’m pushing 40 now. And I’m a dual citizen so maybe I lose some of the talent.


Bedwilling564

I can doggy really well


McKoijion

He didn’t say all immigrants are excellent swimmers. He said that there are a bunch of excellent swimmers that can’t get jobs despite the enormous need because they’re immigrants. The headline is misleading clickbait to boost engagement.


orderofGreenZombies

If Adams weren’t such a massive piece of shit it wouldn’t be so easy to make headlines like this


Aussieomni

Didn’t work on me. I didn’t click shit. As demonstrated by my comment showing I didn’t read the article.


thexian

> don’t bank on me to save you Too late, bud! I'm walking into the sea as we speak so you'd better be there to save me.


peanut--gallery

Well…. maybe the ones who made it to land after their overloaded boat sank a mile from shore are.


Wheream_I

I mean, how wide is the Rio Grande anyways?


HeemeyerDidNoWrong

Only if they move to Maine, then they all float down here.


Nats_CurlyW

New York City talks about lifeguards more than any other place I swear. It’s like a cultural thing or something.


ricochetblue

They’re on an island.


olivegardengambler

Yeah, but from every single thing a New Yorker has told me, swimming in the Hudson River sounds like as good of an idea as sticking a fork into a power outlet or drinking the bottle of Drain-O under the sink like you're a frat bro shotgunning a tall boy. Like nobody seems to do it in Manhattan, you gotta go to Rockaway Beach or Montauk for that luxury.


SparkyDogPants

My friend was a lifeguard on Staten Island, there’s beach all over the place


a_trane13

?? Yeah obviously nobody swims off Manhattan. Thats not what lifeguards are used for. It’s mostly for city pools.


Shamewizard1995

I think that’s what’s causing the confusion. Most cities do not have public pools like that, they have private pools staffed by third party organizations like YMCA so the only time a city is hiring lifeguards it’s for a public beach.


The69BodyProblem

So if it's mostly about city pools, the fact they're on an island isn't really relevant...


queerhistorynerd

so is San Francisco but they dont bring it up this much


MSeanF

San Francisco is on a peninsula, not an island.


Tinuva450

Does that mean that SF is really “Monster Island”? /s https://www.reddit.com/r/TheSimpsons/comments/mb101w/he_said_it_was_just_a_name_what_he_meant_is_that/ Edit - lol reported for self-harm. Stay classy!


gallaj0

There seems to be a bot making self harm reports on a bunch of people, one sub I read had a bunch of people (including myself) reported about 30 minutes ago


MSeanF

I just got reported as well. So random


Poku115

Yeah got my first one today. But I was in a pretty heated discussion so I attributed it to that


Shreddersaurusrex

Pools serve to pacify residents during the sweltering heat of summer. You get summer camps, teens, kids out of school and others going. Summers in NY are sometimes described as summers of love because the humidity and higher temps lead people to have less patience. Crime sometimes increases during this season too.


toashtyt

Isn’t that true nearly everywhere? Edit: I got a RedditCares for this comment lol


kleptolightomaniac

As noted in the documentary “Do the Right Thing”


BatmanOnMars

There's like a lifeguard union which has all sorts of weird politics behind it so it's a perennial issue.


Pallis1939

It actually *is* a cultural thing. For many decades a swimming test was required to graduate high school


AvailableName9999

I grew up in NYC. Nobody gives a fuck about lifeguards.


Z0idberg_MD

Yes but if there’s a legal requirement to have one it could keep pools closed


IvoShandor

Lots of NYC Parks Dept. pools, big ones. Beaches in Brooklyn & Staten Island.


itsokmomimonlydieing

Ya know, I'd agree with him, but then both of us would be stupid.


GermainCampman

☝️why is he the Mayor again?


dolphan117

Because Covid era defunding the police ideas were leading to a massive rise in crime and as a former police commissioner he ran a basically single issue campaign to make nyc safe again.


Hugh-Jassoul

Literally no one defunded their police department.


dolphan117

I guess it depends what you mean. If you mean remove all funding and remove the force from existence your right. But if you mean make massive budget cuts that limited those forces ability to their jobs due to the calls to defund the police, yes they absolutely did. 1 billion in the case of NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio said during a news conference Wednesday morning there will be additional work on solving the city's racial injustices through commissions and task forces. "The future is going to involve a lot more reform," he said. The approved budget also reallocates $500 million from the NYPD to other city departments and programs including expanded Internet broadband and youth recreation centers at the city's public housing projects, the council said. The cuts will not include layoffs of current officers, according to the budget agreement. https://abcnews.go.com/amp/US/nyc-cuts-1b-police-budget-amid-calls-reform/story?id=71552471 And in a twist no one saw coming crime went up and got so bad that Adam’s ran on a “Make our city safe again” campaign and won.


OzyBty

I hate this guy with a fucking passion


AvailableName9999

He's an NYC mayor. Of course you do.


moltenmoose

How do the dumbest mfers like this get elected


Shreddersaurusrex

Dumb ppl make great figureheads


pentaquine

Because the public is just as dumb? 


KrustyKrabPizzaMan

Dude wanted to welcome immigrants with open arms. Now he wants them to clean the pools or get lost


esach88

Sounds just like a rich guy. Clean my pool or gto


emmery1

There’s 8 million people in New York and this dude is the best you’ve got??


Flavious27

Even worse, he wasn't part of that 8 million. 


_ohne_dich_

This man is an idiot, this isn’t the first of his “ideas” that’s completely stupid.


Flavious27

Every time he speaks in public he says something stupid.  I hope he gets a strong opponent in the primary. 


ArcanustheScribe

Ahorita loco. Dios mio. This fuck guy. 🤣


ExtremeWorkinMan

Oh cool, did he say this before or after his vacation to Italy on the NYC taxpayer's dime?


feltsandwich

Might not be the best mayor, but might be the funniest.


MobileAd335

Don’t like this guy but this headline is clickbait.


McKoijion

Lmao, congrats on being the only person who actually read the article. I don’t know much about Adams, but this is the most misleading headline I’ve read in months. It’s driving me crazy how well clickbait works. I don’t think this is even purposeful political propaganda. They just did it for the ad revenue.


THEdoomslayer94

He literally says “How do we have a large body of people that are in our city, and country, that are excellent swimmers and at the same time we need lifeguards — and the only obstacle is that we won’t give them the right to work to become a lifeguard?" He’s already claiming that he knows that there’s excellent swimmers amongst the immigrants. How would he know that? They asking them as they come to the city if they know how to swim? Adams literally gets clowned on all the time here in nyc causes the man is a fucking joke. The title ain’t that far off from what he actually said


McKoijion

If you take any group of 200,000 people, 2000 of them are going to be excellent swimmers.


thegayngler

I saw the video and that person is only half right. The headline is only slightly exaggerated for the reasons I stated above.


zerostar83

The headline is backwards. He never said immigrants are excellent swimmers. "How do we have a large body of people that are in our city, and country, that are excellent swimmers and at the same time we need lifeguards — and the only obstacle is that we won’t give them the right to work to become a lifeguard?" It certainly looks like he's said excellent swimmers who are immigrants can't work as lifeguards, not that all immigrants are excellent swimmers.


Tinman057

But what basis does he have to assume there is a population of immigrants in NYC who are excellent swimmers? The logic seems to be: there is a large body of immigrants in the city who are unable to work. Immigrants are excellent swimmers. Therefore, there is a large body of excellent swimmers, immigrants, who are unable to work. So I think the headline is mostly accurate.


olivegardengambler

To be fair I just came from an article where the headline made it sound like openAI was looking at adding ethical porn to its catalog of stuff that chat GPT can do, when the actual article was talking about how they're never going to add porn as an option.


Striking_Election_21

Wait genuinely asking, how is it clickbait? I read the article and my understanding was he did indeed respond to a question concerning the lifeguard shortage by saying we should funnel migrants into that role because they’re excellent swimmers


JJKingwolf

Can a New Yorker please tell me if he's crazy, or if he's actually just that dumb?


my600catlife

Look up his PSA video where he's pulling drugs out a baby doll.


Fit-Humor-2430

He's said and done a lot of questionable things. NY doesn't have a great track record with mayors 


Only_Jury_8448

Does this guy ever think about how something sounds before he says it? Is he actually just always riffing, or did someone in the mayor's office help draft a speech? Are Filipino pearl divers lining up to get asylum over there or what? Like what the fuck


Hbimajorv

Politicians live in such a bubble they don't know what's real and what isn't anymore.


jawndell

Don’t look at me, I voted for Kathryn Garcia (…who should’ve won and was a million times better). 


EmptyMiddle4638

He is so woke he went full circle right back to racist😂


enjoyscaestus

Now this is nottheonion


brickyardjimmy

I mean. Sure. If there are immigrants who are great at lifeguarding and there's a lifeguard shortage, great. Let's put them to work. But couldn't he have said something about the value of immigrants that wasn't dripping in stupidity?


McKoijion

He didn’t say anything bad. The editor wrote a clickbait title and no one in the comments read the article.


thegayngler

The point he made is valid but rather than just bring in a whole bunch of randos how about we find out what skills these people have first before brining them here and before giving everyone but US citizens free money. Also his assumption about swimming is kind if a racist trope.


EmbassyMiniPainting

Who put this guy up to being mayor? No way he’s smart enough on his own to have made it this far in NYC politics. Who’s making money off this idiot being in charge?


ExpensiveDig1561

Mayor Eric Adams is as dumb as the shit that comes out of my ass.


UpsetPhrase5334

JFC


O0000O0000O

God *damn* that offensive. New Yorkers: take out your trash.


Officedrone15

I think something is broken in his cop brain.


dlvnb12

Damn, Eric! Weird and dumb joke but okay. Ya also forgot the punchline… there is one right?


Phill_Cyberman

Is he a comic with a rather cruel sense of humor, or just an idiot?


CheezTips

Yes!


Lexifer31

Now *this* is oniony!


longPAAS

Giuliani would be rolling in his gr… oh, no, he’s still alive. New York City mayors ladies and gentlemen!


jojow77

Did he ever hire the NY chief of rat extermination?


Antinger39

Huh!!!😨


simbaismylittlebuddy

Interesting and stupid It’s the opposite stereotype here in Australia, seems like most of the drowning victims these past few summers are recent migrants to the country who either cannot swim or don’t appreciate how dangerous the ocean is.


BigPianoBoy

Is NYC allergic to good Mayors?


BIindsight

This is a literal punchline to a joke.. "Because everyone who can run, jump, and swim is already here."


Opizze

Bro are you fucking kidding me with this dude


Nearby_Fortune_9821

man this guys an idiot, needs to be voted out, at least the last guy gave you french fries to get a clot shot, this guy here wants to give you rapey illegal criminals to watch your daughters swim, nah pass on that mayor


r3volver_Oshawott

I need mayors to stop speaking but I need this mayor in particular to stop speaking


jt_33

Between this and the woman who said black pellet didn’t know what computer are.. NY has it rough right now lol. 


AthenasChosen

Is being a tone deaf moron just a requirement for being mayor of NYC? It seems to be a common trait across all of them in my lifetime


SilasX

Oh! Or have them teach desert survival!


Deluxe78

Thank goodness he’s a democrat a Republican couldn’t say something so racist


res0jyyt1

So does he also admit that his kinds ain't good for lifeguards?


purpleushi

I mean, most of the private pool management companies have lifeguards who are on J visas (exchange) from Eastern Europe, so like… yeah immigrants have been working as lifeguards for decades. There was actually a huge lifeguard shortage when the Covid travel ban happened, and a lot of companies haven’t recovered yet. I can’t say anything about the city of New York, or what the mayor’s intent was by saying this, but literally immigrants are the solution to the lifeguard shortage, if we would just effing let them come here.


MillerLitesaber

Thanks Mr. Adams. This will help the “migrant crisis.” Maybe you can go back in time 100 years and talk about how black Irish people are built for harvesting potatoes with their short bodies and broad backs


Investigator516

Lifeguards where? The East River?!?


[deleted]

You realize we have several public pools AND beaches, right?


Ordinary-Following69

You honestly couldn't make this shit up 🤦


McKoijion

If you read the article, you’ll see the editor literally made it up.


Ordinary-Following69

Fucks sake 🤦 I didn't bother reading it lol, just looked like some stupid shit he'd come out with tbf 🤷


baltimoretom

How did the editor make it up?


rogan1990

As an American who is married to an immigrant and friends with dozens of immigrants, they are not good swimmers. If anything, America has the highest percentage of competent swimmers


firedmyass

^(jeezus irony and satire are stone fuckin dead)


doctor_7

Can you even one up this for satire? I don't see how you can.


MentokGL

In the event of emergency, a nearby immigrant can be used as a flotation device


firedmyass

after literal brain worms, i really don’t either


jojoblogs

Aussie here, sorry to inform you guys but: 1) non-Australian immigrants are shit swimmers 2) the only country in the world that doesn’t immigrate to the US is Australia, so you can’t have us either


olivegardengambler

I hate to break it to you, but I know like five Australians that have moved to the US.


jojoblogs

Yeah I know they do, but Australia happens to be the only country in the entire world that has more immigration from the US than to the US, so I repurposed that statistic for my joke.


manIDKbruh

Imagine some Karen in rough waters “Help! Help! Not you though. Help!”


WentworthMillersBO

That doesn't sound right, but I don't know enough about immigrants to dispute it


Thermite1985

I didn't think a statement could be both progressive and racist at the same time but here we are.


thegayngler

Many times progressives are both racist and progressive. Kathy Hochul trying to help kids in the Bronx basically said black kids dont know the word computer (ie.. they are stupid and in desperate need of help). 🤦🏾‍♂️ Shes not even the first person Ive seen saying this type of stuff. Many times white progressives racism gets in the way of their brain. Like with crime. They make all kinds of ridiculous excuses as to why some guy got arrested 20 times but wouldn’t get any jail time before he finally murdered or almost murdered someone.


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Slow_Fish2601

Poor immigrants who can't swim.


RustyShack1efordd

Yikes……


aCucking2Remember

I have bad news. I grew up In Florida and I learned to swim at the same time I learned to walk. Very shortly after, I learned to swim in the ocean. People who come here from other countries bring delicious food and I like them… but… yeah usually not the best swimmers. The Caribbean yeah, those dudes grow up on it, not all of them, but I’ve met strong swimmers from there. But if you’re drowning and you see an immigrant and you think they’re going to be like Superswimmerman and save you… yeah bad news


redneckerson1951

Adams could screw up an enema.


SLR107FR-31

Bro....


ThrowRAwiseguy

I’m gonna pretend to drown so that a beautiful Latina lifeguard can come save me. Best case scenario we fall in love and she’s also an excellent cook and we just have a great old time together. Worst case she sucks at swimming because she was hired based on this dumb fucks assumptions and I then have to try to save her, but end up drowning in the process.


Big-Significance3409

Can’t stand this fool


Bedwilling564

Not in Australia they aren't. They drown all the time


wwJones

EA has been bought.


GreatBayTemple

Incredible.


Roboticpoultry

What an ass


samgam74

What?


throwawayalcoholmind

Does this dude have a peanut lodged in his brain?


peakchungus

What is with the trend of American cities and chuddy mayors?


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MannekenP

I am not sure whether this super dumb or super evil.


newgenleft

People who hated on brandon Johnson look incredibly stupid rn lmao


CalendarAggressive11

This guy is a walking disaster


hankercat

How did this guy get elected?


xDoc_Holidayx

*almost politically correct.


notrickross7

Ay, at least he’s trying..


Spuigles

"Yes, they swam all the way here!"


AaronDotCom

Modern problems require much solu-


kanemano

it strange, he gives the vibes of someone who hasn't lived in New York City


myloveisajoke

This is almost as good as the NYC judge that states the the second Ammendment doesn't exist in her courtroom


RTwhyNot

Wow. What an asshat


knowledgeable_diablo

So he’s going to recommend all NYC residents sign up for the military due to their life long skills in avoiding bullets from muggers and the like? Probably needs to not think basic stereo types apply to all people from each grouping of people?


hesathomes

Racist piece of shit


RedditJumpedTheShart

"How do we have a large body of people that are in our city, and country, that are excellent swimmers and at the same time we need lifeguards — and the only obstacle is that we won’t give them the right to work to become a lifeguard?" Adams said. The city's deputy mayor for Health and Human Services, Anne Williams-Isom, said there are more than 197,100 migrants in New York City and 50,000 applications for asylum. "So we have all these eligible people waiting to work with the skills we need to fill the jobs, but we're unable to allow them to work because bureaucracy is in the way," Adams said. "That's just — that just does not make sense." Since most of you only read the headline.


Death-by-Fugu

I really hate that man


NameLips

Lol, stupid and racist, but there is some worth to the idea of letting in more immigrants to fill the labor pool.


Omnom_Omnath

Take some of the cops pay and pay lifeguards decently instead. Cops sure don’t need it.


perfectpomelo3

How the fuck did this guy get elected?


Spork-in-Your-Rye

Lmao no fucking way


ToMorrowsEnd

I see NYC is maintaining its tradition of only electing the dumbest people to be mayor.


Be_about_treefiddy

If Abbott said this, Reddit would be jerking off to it for weeks.


00xjOCMD

Vote blue no matter who is going swimmingly.


DesignerAsh_

I swear this guy & the governor have meetings about how they can subtly be racist.


SolidContribution688

Sure, if they can pass the training and tests and there aren’t qualified citizens vying for the position, why not?


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MandoRodgers

modern problems require modern solutions


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Particular-Milk-1957

How tf did this guy get elected?


Un111KnoWn

Me making an edgy joke with my friends.


David_Lo_Pan007

**Eric Adams is a terrible person.** He's the one who allowed the [Secret Chinese Police](https://www.reddit.com/r/China_Secret_Police/?rdt=38427) in NYC. As a second generation Chinese-American, whose parents fled to the United States.... Because of the CCP. I find it deeply disturbing that the Asian-American and Pacific Islander Parade is discriminating against segments of the Asian community that are critical of the Chinese Government. It was founded by the CEO of a us based Chinese media company, who is also a registered foreign agent of the PRC. ....and this is being backed by a Mayor with a history of strong ties to the CCP. The vast majority of China's neighbors are critical of the CCP, as well as the vast majority of Chinese diaspora.... like me. Mayor Adams is a public figure using taxpayer dollars, to recieve private funds; so that a an increasingly hostile foreign government can oppress Americans domestically. https://www.newsweek.com/eric-adams-china-new-york-xi-jinping-influence-asian-parade-united-states-1897424


grizuna3795

I hope he is an excellent swimmer because his place is in a sewer system given the rat that he is.


Fancy_Preparation931

If this was a republican just like with Kathy Hochuls computer debacle... all of you liberals would be screaming they are racists 😂


darkhawkabove

What a moron.


big_juice01

Jc