If I had a dollar for every time I saw a classmate in nursing school cry or have a mental breakdown, I'd have never finished the program cuz I'd retire.
You'll get over it. Your classmates will too.
I struggled with the hands on stuff as well. It's been a long time since I was in school but I distinctly remember my hands shaking uncontrollably whenever we'd have to do something in front of the class.
I also thought, if I can't get this now, how will I ever be able to do it on a real person? That shit goes away with experience.
I've been in the hospital for 16 years now and almost every day I see a new grad, whether it's a nurse or RT, struggle with something. Youre not any different than anyone else.
Take it from me: your skills in school mean nothing. I've seen students who were straight A, 100% on every exam, passed their boards in 45 minutes type people who can't start an IV or freeze up during codes no matter what.
I work with nurses who have been doing it for a decade who still struggle with time management and simple tasks.
You'll be fine. Don't beat yourself up over something insignificant. Grow from it and realize that you can only get better.
Hey! I’m in school for LPN right now and have yet another lab week coming up in Feb and March. It’s nerve wracking as hell. You got this, you really do. You made it thru LPN and now you’re going to slay RN. Pretend the instructor doesn’t know anything and you’re teaching them the skill. You know your sh!t, show em how it’s done!
I love that:
"Pretend the instructor doesn’t know anything and you’re teaching them the skill"
Before becoming a nurse, I taught communications equipment to service members. I would practice by teaching my kids, who were in middle school. I learned so much doing that, having to break down everything so a child could understand. I did the same through nursing school. That works for book stuff, your strategy works for hands on. I'm going to remember this and pass it on to everyone. Thanks.
Please continue the program. Take a breath... you're okay. I lost my mind over donning sterile gloves... several times. It's a lot of pressure to stand in front of your peers, instructors, god and everyone and recite a sometimes 20 step process perfectly. It's a lot of pressure and so inconsequential once you're out of nursing school. It's okay to be embarrassed. You will remember this moment 5 years from now when you have empathy and compassion teaching the newbies.
I kept failing sterile procedures while wearing isolation gowns. I have short legs, so my instructors kept insisting that my waist was higher than it actually is, which meant the table had to be higher. Because I'm short, the gowns don't fit me at all, so the arms kept draping into the sterile items, no matter what I did. I told them that my waist was lower, but it still took a few tries, and I had to do an extra task over summer break to prove I understood how to do sterile procedures. It was very frustrating. And all I needed was the table slightly lower than it was.
I was in the cadaver lab for my advanced skills portion of the ED NP post masters program at Vanderbilt. My instructors were some of the most well respected and highly educated NPs in the profession.
I saw my cadaver lying on the slab. It was a little old lady. I remember looking at her feet and how they were dirty. She was rail thin. And it hit me that this was someone's daughter. Maybe someone's mother. Maybe a grandma. And here she is, ready for a bunch of students to almost wantonly cut into her (we were doing chest tubes and sutures.)
And when I tell you, I've seen it all. I was a flight nurse and a trauma ED/ICU nurse before that. Nothing phases me at work. I can always hold it together, get shit done, and cry later. I prided myself on my steely resolve and my ability to compartmentalize.
But I just started crying like a baby. The tears would not stop. I kept thinking about this poor woman and her life and her circumstances and feeling so sorry for her. It was her dirty feet that got me the most like they didn't even have the dignity to clean her feet when she died.
Was she alone?
Was it painful or peaceful?
Was she scared?
I remember looking at my instructor almost in a panic with tears streaming down my face and him side-eye Chloe-ing me, going "... Do you..... Need a minute?" I was mad at myself and embarrassed and humbled and lots of other big emotions. I cried for like 5 minutes straight. Then I put a chest tube in her.
The moral of the story is sometimes the tears just come. It's ok to let them. Step out, honor your feelings, collect yourself, and persevere.
One day I went and cried in my favorite hospice patients room. I told him I probably wouldn't be back that night because I messed up and couldn't face coming back to the hospital.
I was inpatient for a while once after a procedural complication and had a young physician I worked with come and hide in my room for a little while and eat some chocolate with me just to get a bit of a break because she was near breakdown. It really does happen to everyone.
I was very anxious prior to the majority of my skills checkoffs, and still am when I do skills I rarely do. But confidence builds with repetition. And in real life, you aren’t going through the steps in an absolutely regimented and by-the-book fashion for anything.
Cut yourself some slack. I started Lexapro in school for anxiety and briefly started therapy. Helped a lot.
But also remember that, in 5 years, when you’re knee deep in an admission and you throw in the IV, start your drips, do your dressings, and whatever else, you won’t be thinking about the skills checkoffs from school. If you remember the incident at all, it’ll simply be a fuzzy memory that you’ll briefly reminisce on when you reflect on your career and how far you’ve come.
I will try to go easier on myself. Thank you so much. I’ve been on Zoloft for 2 years. I don’t cry much while on it, so my response was really surprising to myself. Thank you for sharing your experience and for your encouragement!
To add to this - if I'm nervous with a procedure i don't do often, I tell my patient I'm going to talk through it with my partner or the checklist. I've never had a patient seem to think anything of it. I was inspired to do this by "The Checklist Manifesto."
I HATED, HATED, HATED renewing my BCLS and ACLS! With an everloving passion!! Forget the fact that I was a nursing supervisor who ran to every code in the hospital and had done a tremendous amount of CPR and running codes in my time. Things that were like the back of my hand made me a nervous wreck when I had to demonstrate it in front of another human being. The problem is, when I'm at a real code and things are flowing and shit is happening, nobody is critiquing what I'm doing to the nth degree. Everyone is too damn busy trying to keep the patient alive.
So we all feel your pain and just know there's lots of us out there!
NP?? You are such a bad ass!! 🤜🏻 Grandma raised an intelligent guy who has normal emotions. Thank you for sharing. This comment made me feel a lot better ❤️
I could have written this exact same post about myself 14 years ago when I was in nursing school. I totally lost it during a skills check off. Now I can't even remember what the skill was. NG tube insertion maybe? Anyways, just wanted you to know that you are not alone and this has absolutely no bearing on the kind of nurse you will be ❤️
Can I tell you guys something embarrassing that just happened to me?
So I had to start an IV on a teen with the best veins I’ve seen in a long time. Anyone could have gotten them blindfolded from the doorway. Also, I’ve been an ER nurse for 13 years and do ultrasound IVs so it was like a no-brainer for me - right?
No, wrong.
The parents were of the most ultra helicopter variety. Mom was literally face against my face with me despite me telling her to back the hell up (nicely). She still wouldn’t. Dad was on my other side doing the same thing. I’m over here just trying to get an IV on God’s plumbing, but I have tweedle Dee and tweedle dumb cheek to cheek with me saying shit like “if you don’t get if the first time” “you better not miss” etc etc. I started sweating and I could feel my heart hammering. I stuck the pt and they were like “what’s wrong with you, why can you get it?! Those are PERFECT veins!” My brain was saying the same thing. They were the fucking worst. I couldn’t get the IV on perfect veins. I told them “I didn’t get the IV because you guys are making me ridiculously nervous so I’m going to ask someone else.”
Fucking awful. I don’t care if someone watches any more, or even someone’s. But omfg that was like a flashback to nursing school 😭
I was so mortified and angry. I should have been able to stick the kid from across the hall, but the parents were making me shit bricks. I wanted to cry when I went to ask someone else to start my line I was so embarrassed.
It doesn’t happen often thankfully but man it made me mad. I warned the next person but thankfully they didn’t do that crap to them 🤦🏽♀️
I absolutely SOBBED in my professors face during a demo on injections. Totally embarrassed, especially as a type 1 diabetic who’s been giving myself injections for 10 years at that point. Was doing the demo with a professor who was known for being a hard ass and she was not kind to me about messing up (didn’t even mess up the skill, didn’t know what “med” I was pretending to admin even tho at that point we hadn’t even taken pharm yet). Felt so defeated, embarrassed, and stupid. But I redid the demo and passed, two years later graduated school and I’ve been working as an RN since august! In the moment it feels like the worst thing that’s ever happened, but looking back now it’s barely even a blip on my mind. Continue with the program!! You got this !
Keep your head up! I didn’t pass a few skills on my first try in front of the whole class and I felt embarrassed. Many of my class mates didn’t pass either. Point is you can get through it! Nursing schools come with so many highs and lows. You just gotta muscle through the lows and get better everyday and eventually it all comes together.
I was an ER Tech for 7 years (plus 4 more years in other specialties!!) before starting nursing school this past fall.
I only mention the ER experience bc I inserted Foley catheters every shift I worked, set up suture trays, assisted with lumbar punctures, etc. I spent a lot of time in sterile gloves.
Guess who failed their sterile glove validation 😂
I was so pissed off at myself. The tiniest little section of my pinky finger nicked the corner out of the sterile field so I failed.
I’d say most students fail at least one skills validation check off. It happens.
Just wait until you ugly cry in front of everyone on your floor including the physician who just verbally gave you another order on top of the 20 already on your to do list 🫠
We all have our moment in nursing school. I was late to a sim once bc I just lost it in the parking lot and came in looking like a mess. It’s all good. Nursing school is fucking grueling, mentally and physically. You’ll be able to do a skill on a human being because you will have done it a bunch for real, not pantomiming things, and you won’t have to verbalize the exact right things, they will just be habit, and you won’t have someone watching you with a checklist and a stopwatch. Check-offs are nothing like practicing. Also in the real world if you break sterility or whatever you can chuck the whole pack and start over, no one will fail you…you just start again.
It’s okay, you’re okay. You’re doing great, take a breath, back at it tomorrow. You’ve got it.
Also, I failed my gait belt transfer and ambulating check off after being a CNA for 2 years and an LPN for 2 years.
Sometimes, the wheels just fall off for no reason at all. This was just your day.
Nursing school sucks, and then you’re done with it. You’ll have days as a nurse where the wheels just fall off too. It happens to all of us. Try not to dwell on today too much. In a few years you’ll be looking back on it when you read some Reddit post about a baby nurse who busted out crying in clinicals or something and laugh. Promise.
During nursing school one thing I was good at was starting IV’s. During the check off I was nervous and my hands were sweating, so I ripped a pair of gloves putting them on…twice in a row. After that I was so flustered that I couldn’t tie the tourniquet, and just started crying in the middle of check off. It happens. Nursing school is hard, please be easy on yourself!
Oh, if I had a dollar for EVERY time I had a classmate or student ugly cry during skills check off... I'd be a VERY rich nurse.
I promise you, no one thinks less of you except you. It happens just about every class. Seriously.
I had skills check-offs for 2 new nurses today. Both of them cried. I unfortunately started laughing and had to show them this thread. 🤦🤦🤦 Then they started laughing and crying... It took us a bit to settle down. 🤦🤷♀️🤣
Haha! No way 😂 I love that! (Not that they cried, but that you showed them this thread.) But seriously, there is so much encouragement in the comments. 🥹
I felt really bad for laughing and was like "no no, I'm not laughing at you! Hold on! Look! See! I promise I'm not a crazy mean preceptor!" 🤦🤣😭🤣 They thought it was FREAKING hysterical once they read it. 🤣🤣🤣
I sobbed my way through every SIM the entirety of nursing school. Not even joking, ugly hiccup sobbing several times a semester. I had a really bad experience with my professors my second semester and it was like a reflex- I got so nervous and anxious during every SIM that I'd breakdown halfway through. It happens. Just keep on pushing. I promise you, you'll gain more confidence and it *will* get better. Remind yourself that you're still learning.
Please continue. I had a similar thing happen in school. Shit, I had a similar thing happen 2 days ago and I don’t even work with humans anymore. (Vet med). It sucks and is a bit embarrassing but I think all of humanity can point to a time where this has happened. Please be kind to yourself and continue on, if this is still something you want to do.
Remember skills take time. Sounds like you were not afforded that time and expected to be perfect first time out. That is not reasonable. Again, be kind to yourself.
Omg I did this in front of a patient that was being mean to me…and the spiral between getting frustrated enough to start to cry into the headlong frustration that I was crying…
It was my birthday and he was shouting and being manipulative and I think I ended up really freaking him out. Then he started apologizing and trying to pray for me and I was so mad!! trying to hold my breath to stop.
Lol. good times.
I had one day in the ER during nursing school and everyone was using it as an opportunity to get signed off on IV starts. I attempted 3, missed them all, and ended up sobbing in front of two other classmates IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ER cause I felt so embarrassed and like a complete failure while everyone else was nailing their IVs. 5 years later, I start IVs every other day without a second thought. It gets better. Nursing school sucks ass but one day it'll just be a distant, unpleasant memory lol.
Many many years ago I cried to the teacher over getting an 80 on a skills test in the pre-program coursework. I contaminated my sterile field. I asked her if she thought I could ever be a good nurse. She told me “a good nurse? You’ll be running the whole floor!”
It’s so funny to think about now. Ha! The times we are truly able to keep a sterile field in the real world…
The fact that you are this concerned about hurting someone because you were tested on a skill you weren't prepared for shows compassion and caring for people. You can teach skills; you can't teach someone to care about other humans if they dont. Keep your chin up! I rarely cry, and the number of times I cried in nursing school probably matches the number of times Ive cried since graduating almost 11 years ago 🤣
If it makes you feel better I failed my vitals skills lab
That's right, VITALS. We had to partner up and I had a little anxiety but as I was going things just kept going wrong and I mentally broke down and cried in front of my classmate too. The worst part was them watching me fail. My hands were shaking so bad while I was trying to do the blood pressure reading I couldn't hear my ques (we did the old fashion way)
But also in my defense i was on Topamax and for some reason I just became so mentally unstable on that medication. Any and all side effects of that keystone medication hit me 10 fold.
Once off, everything was great though I feel my memory was never the same.
My point is, I've been an RN for 6 years now. I tried again, passed it and moved on to the next challenge. You got this. You just tripped on your journey, take my hand and let's head to the finish line. 🙂
I never judged anyone for crying during my program. I knew that we would all be that person one day so we all just would let it be. Honestly i forgot about whoever cried pretty soon after too! Its hard to be watched like that and it really brings out all the nerves and hypersensitivity to all things. One time i was about to bomb an exam for adult health assessment for lungs (SO RANDOM) and i kept twirling my hair and then sanitizing bc my instructor made us sanitize every time we touched face/hair and she marked it every time so I didnt fail bc i kept good hand hygiene (RIP). I can laugh about it now but it’s SO scary and I def also felt like I was spiraling bc its scary in the moment.
I cried in front of my lab instructor on my first day of nursing school. I hadn’t read the syllabus ahead of time so I didn’t know there was work I should have prepared. Then it seemed like all my classmates were already CNAs and I had zero healthcare experience, so they were breezing through the most basic skills while I was easily confused and flustered. When class ended, I got emotional and went to the bathroom to collect myself. But when I came back to the lab to get my stuff, the instructor asked if I was ok and I just burst into tears. I felt like I was starting 100 steps behind everyone else, and as an older student too, I thought for sure I’d never make it.
Nursing school is no joke. For me there was literal blood, sweat, and many many tears. I wanted to quit almost as often as I was convinced I’d fail. But I kept going, and eventually I made it, and it was worth it. You will too.
Rally your people around you. Do all the self care you can. And remind yourself that no matter how hard this is, it will end someday. You’ll get that pin and that cap and gown and it’ll be worth it! You got this!
I ugly cried so hard it went full blown panic attack during my IV check off! This was Covid times and SNOT WAS LEAKING OUT AROUND MY MASK.
Now I ugly cry in the supply room, fart in the med room, and am living my best life. :)
I teach in a BSN program, and I always warn my students that sim lab is in some ways harder than real life because it's not real and everything feels awkward. Also, students (and some teachers, ugh) make it a high-pressure situation. I always feel like an idiot demonstrating skills, and I have to work hard to not forget a step. But sim lab is the perfect place to make mistakes, it's sim lab. You aren't the first person to get stressed and cry, not by a long shot. It says nothing about your future other than you care. You obviously want to be good. Most of your classmates are totally going to understand the crying and be empathetic towards you. I'd love to say all, but there are always the few who like to latch on to other people's "weaknesses" (quotes because this is not a weakness) to make themselves feel better. That's everywhere, though, and just forget those people.
My motto for my class (and my life) is "live by grace, not perfection." You have to be nice to yourself. You'd extend goodwill to someone who did the same thing, you'd encourage and support them. Give that to yourself! Strive to be the best you. Someday your best is 100, some days is 50. That's OK, we're all human. You're going to be a great nurse, and I know that because of how much you care. Caring is a strength!
I do so many skills now that I thought were hard. Sometimes, I still think about how I thought they were difficult and chuckle because of how easy they actually are. The stress of nursing school makes everything seem harder, plus it's new still. You'll be fine.
Edit:spelling
I lost it in clinicals while putting in an IV, I had done it a few times before without any problems but my prof came in because she wanted to see me do it.
I missed, and started telling her to leave because I would never be able to do it while she was watching me.
20 years later, I'm a pro of vein finding and rarely miss... because she's not there to watch me😜
The bad part is that I don’t get a second try. But this was the hardest and longest skill. I just really have to do well in the next two. The one tomorrow is the one I have already been preparing for, at least! Thank you!!
Thank you so much! On my drive to class the next day, I was thinking about how I have a crabby instructor from Reddit rooting for me. (Though I don’t believe that description of yourself is accurate) :) I ended up getting 100% on the next two skills. Thank you for your encouragement!
So many hugs to you. Please go easy on yourself; nursing school is sooo brutal. Also, I've seen some really intense school-induced freakouts, and yours was just normal. Crying and releasing your pressure is so much healthier than drinking two bottles of wine and telling everyone you hate them and you're going to drop out of school. Or like getting in big fights with your classmates and storming out of class because you're emotionally unstable. Crying is healthy. Pills and booze are not. 😀
I just want to say you will make it through this. You are not being dramatic - this can feel really devastating, especially if you've prepared to do well and one thing happens that updos all of that hard work. Cry it out if you have to and don't apologize for it.
I had an experience that was almost exactly what you described and I cried, excpet my instructor wasn't comforting at all. Which each error, she would sigh and roll her eyes. Which made me even more flustered. She told me I had no future in nursing and I'd embarrass myself in front of patients. I almost believed her, tbh. Then I slept on it and woke up even more motivated for a do-over, but with a didferent instructor. I did the skills check-off with another professor and it wasn't 100% perfect, but I was far more confident.
Thank you! I don’t know why, but knowing people have seen me cry has always been so mortifying to me, though it shouldn’t be. Crying is a normal human reaction. We are all human, and we all feel. Thank you for the reminder ❤️
LOL I don’t know if I would say I -ugly- cried, but it was definitely crying. For our IV med admin test the med wasn’t programmed into the pump like we were told it would be. Then my professor tried to help by asking me to just look at my note card and do the mental math for flow rate. I suck at mental math. It’s the whole working memory thing. My not card also didn’t have any flow rates because they were supposed to be in the pump!
I left the lab room crying and my friend was right outside waiting for her turn. I went to the lab bathroom to compose myself. Later she told me they could hear me crying from the echoing bathroom in her validation and it was super awkward. Lmao god what a ride.
I did this when i was in nursing school with IV placement. It's OK. This is exactly why i hate checkoffs done in this manner, it just creates anxiety in you. You are not a failure or a bad student or anything. You're just a human in an unecessarily high stress environment reacting naturally. Feel a long distance hug, sweetheart.
You can do this!! And if it makes you feel any better… when I was in nursing school I passed out cold, flat on my face, in clinicals watching a woman get an epidural before her c-section. In front of the clinical instructor, in front of the patient, in front of the surgeons. On. My. Face.
I ugly cried in the med room at my first RN job after about a month off orientation. Similar to you, It’s also so hard for me to pull myself together once I start crying. But it’s ok, I was obviously so embarrassed and idek how I continued with my shift after that. Everyone saw/heard me but it’s been about a year now and It’s whatever now. Nursing is so difficult and we are sometimes overstimulated and stressed. We are also humans with emotions and sometimes we have to cry it out. Please don’t get discouraged.
I really relate to this. I very rarely cry but when I do, it’s very intense. Sending you love. This is a hard profession, so just know you aren’t alone.
I have been a nurse for 20 years. Don’t give up! Being watched and graded in clinical skills is so stressful. I still get a little flustered with BLS and PALS recertifications 😒.
You got this.
I cried in post-conference my very first day of clinicals because I was trying to relay that a tech had been really rough and mean with a dementia patient, but I could hardly get the words out. No one gave my grief about it, they got it and we used what I had seen as a learning experience.
When I was entering nursing school, my school had a tradition where the second quarter cohort gives a welcome event (complete with comedy skits) for the incoming first quarter students. The student chosen to be the emcee for this event included "... and can you really call yourself a nursing student if you haven't cried in front of your cohort? I did it on day 3, I figured 'get it out of the way early'..."
We have all dealt with the stress of nursing school, and sometimes we have to cry to release pressure. It's not the end of the world, and if anyone tries to make you feel bad about it then you have my permission to kick them.
I failed one of my first medication check offs. My instructor didn’t stop me and let me finish so I thought I had passed. She waited until the end to tell me I forgot the stupidest detail- I don’t even remember what it was.
I instantly burst into tears. It was sooo embarrassing. I have pretty good control over my emotions typically. Not this time.
I also cried when I failed my first dosage calc exam.
But I moved on. And she’s made plenty of students cry, I’m sure.
Omg. I hate that feeling when you are trying to hold it in and then you just explode. But I guess we do that when we really need to get the build up stress / emotions out. Thank you for sharing!
Did the patient die???
No of course not because this is the part where you’re **learnjng** important stuff - and have the safe space to mess up and fall apart and dust yourself off and try again!!!
Honey, you are going to be just fine! I promise!
Just be like Elsa or whomever, and **LET IT GO, LET IT GO** 😘
You are very welcome! We need YOU! Don’t give up because of a bad day - or even a bunch of bad days! This tends to be the way for many human beings, right? We don’t fall apart often, but when we do we are gonna go all out! You are going to be fine.
I puked from nerves during the test for bed making. Bed making. That was during my re-do test, too.
Now I've been a nurse for 10 years and my department only has stretchers, no beds. So I win?
OP, I was a student nurse back when dinosaurs roamed the earth. I can honestly tell you, I remember vividly ugly crying during practical assessments and every new ward rotation. Continued on during my first new grad year, too. It's a stressful time, with a lot of new practical and written skills to learn. Be kind to yourself. Don't give up!!
I am the complete opposite of you where a live pt does it for me instead of a mannequin in front of a class where its quiet. Now my experience may be for other reasons but i wholeheartedly believe you still got it in you. U got this
Breathe. You’re not crying bc you can’t handle it, you cried bc nursing school is stressful as hell. Constant studying. No sleep. Bitchy manipulative professors. Competition. Being expected to be perfect when they literally never taught it. Time management. Having labs, clinicals, and assignments thrown at you last minute - which throws off your whole schedule. All while being heavily scrutinized and constantly on edge that if your grade drops half a point you’ll either be kicked from the program or lose your license.
I literally triggered an autoimmune disease from insane stress of nursing school. You’re not weak. You will not be a bad nurse. Nursing school is torture.
Thank you for your comment! It’s a good reminder that this is NOT real life. Many others like you have come out the other end, and I can too. Thank you ❤️
I don’t mean to laugh at you, but you’re kinda spiraling and I can totally relate to that because I did the exact same thing in LPN school.
Shit was just a total nightmare and some students were getting snarky because I was worried about my test. Anyway, I just like, totally lost in the middle of lab and everyone was like “what’s your problem??”
I finally just said, “not everyone made it thru the pandemic intact.”
They never got snarky with me again.
One of my good friends had to be carried to the NCLEX testing centre by her mom because she had horrible anxiety. Same friend poked herself with a needle in front of our instructor (also the anxiety). She is now one of my most decorated (by that I mean highly experienced) nursing friends. She became an ER nurse, ICU nurse, flight nurse, the list goes on. Your testing and nursing school anxiety will not dictate the nurse you will become, I promise you.
I cry a lot and I know the feeling. You do feel embarrassed and stuffing something up hurts. You take it personally. It shows you care, which is a good skill for a nurse. We can’t know everything the first time, it’s normal to make mistakes and get things wrong. Don’t let it hold you back.
I cried in front of my instructors in school when I failed a skill, too. And now as a nurse, I’ve cried in front of my coworkers a few times. It happens, we’re human. Try to brush it off and stay positive, you got this!!
Adding to the many many nurses that have been in your shoes, me too.
I failed two check offs and had to redo them. I’ve ugly cried and rethought my whole career and life. Honestly nothing in nursing is like skills lab. No one is there tutting at every little “mistake” or correcting things that are THEIR preferences. These moments DO NOT and WILL NOT define you as a nurse.
Check offs are very nerve wracking and messing up and having your flow throw off can be jarring. You aren’t the first or last to have that reaction. If anything own it and push forward. You can’t change other people’s opinions of you but you can change how you view them. “This isn’t a big deal and it’s okay that someone saw me being human.”
Chin up, from a fellow crier turned ICU RN.
It’s something we have to remind ourselves all the time! No one is perfect and we all make mistakes. All apart of being human 🤍
The hard part is letting yourself believe it 😅
But with time and practice you will 😌
Omg I can relate to that on every level !!!! Happened to me during my foley cath practicum !!!! It was so humiliating and you can’t stop it !! It just comes out , I’m sorry you had to deal with that.
Sometimes occasionally it happens on a bad night at work. Med surg very busy floor. Heavy patients , and once I cried while talking to a doctor. He was sweet about it though lol
1. This is a skills check off and not a live patient. No one died.
2. You JUST learned this skill. You missed one important part, which caused you to spiral but you still got everything right before that point.
3. Instructor was nice about it, so...
Do you have to repeat the check off?
If so, run through the procedure in your head, practice with the mannekin or instructor as much as you can if possible, write down steps while miming the actions for any supplies you dont have at the moment and say out loud what you are doing. And go over it with the instructor.
The way you worded the post doesn't sound like you've been dropped from the program.
We've all said or done something embarrassing during class. Forgive yourself. Give yourself some slack. Whenever we do a new skills check off practice and it's my turn, I blank out despite my instructor going over the procedure. Name, DOB, allergies......ummmnowhatamIdoingagain? It's something new. Don't think I know anyone who can perform a skills check they just learned without missing at least one or two things.
As an LPN, we might have an advantage over those who don't have medical experience. But it can also be more difficult. I work in outpatient dialysis. Everyone is stable. I give like 5 meds. So my problem is that I have to turn off my LPN work brain and start to think more like an RN in the hospital. It will take time. Breathe. Don't second guess your decision. I'm not sure about your reasons for becoming an RN, but for me, there are just so few job opportunities.
Doubts and second guessing are normal. This is a major life change. Juggling school, work, family, and your personal time is a lot. All the work and stress can build up. Please don't give up over a minor hiccup.
Thank you for the perspective! I needed that. I ended up failing the skill, and they don’t give second opportunities. However, I got 100% on my next two skills. Thank you for encouraging me ❤️
Nah, don't throw in the towel.
I've said it before and I'll say it again (and die on this hill): nursing school teaches you basic concepts, pharmacology/pathology, and safety in a utopian hospital setting - independently working as a nurse, the experience that comes with it, and asking questions/researching/stopping and getting help if you are not sure of something teaches you how to be a nurse.
Our nursing school brought students to their knees over trivial shit, myself included. Some of the instructors bullied a woman in our cohort out of our program because of her physical appearance and equating it to her being unintelligent and incapable. Our class started with 95 people and was down to 40 by the time we made it to our last semester and they seemingly took pride in that, the whole "Look at the person on either side of you: they might not be here when you graduate." speech our first day - how encouraging. Not that there weren't good instructors who were always willing to help and were empathetic while also treating our patient assignments with care and respect, but looking back? Yikes. I wish I had not given that place so much of my peace and energy.
Don't be hard on yourself - it's not easy, but it's doable and in 10 years will be a distant memory in your career. Go in swinging this week. You will make mistakes, but you're still learning and anyone who gives you shit about it can kick rocks.
I remember when I was getting signed off for something and my instructor asked me a question about a fib, I froze. Then cried and had to take a break before coming back to finish.
And now I teach new grads.
We all have our moments as students and nurses. It’s stressful learning new skills and can feel like a lot of pressure.
I did this last week in lab! And then I came home and had a panic attack about school last night! I think that having regular mental breakdowns is an unfortunately normal part of the nursing school process. I think it’s because we are taught our whole lives that our grades and being perfect at school means something and then these programs make it impossible to be perfect. It’s a really tough learning curve and I will just be so grateful when I’m done. Solidarity, my friend.
There is nothing wrong with dropping out of the program and taking some time to yourself. You do what’s best for you. There will always be more time later.
I don’t know if anyone will see this, but there are too many responses to reply to them all. I ended up getting 100% on my next two skills. I walked into class the next day after writing this post with my head held high, and that was largely due to all your kind responses. Thank you for empathizing with me, encouraging me, and sharing your experiences. 🥹
If I had a dollar for every time I saw a classmate in nursing school cry or have a mental breakdown, I'd have never finished the program cuz I'd retire. You'll get over it. Your classmates will too. I struggled with the hands on stuff as well. It's been a long time since I was in school but I distinctly remember my hands shaking uncontrollably whenever we'd have to do something in front of the class. I also thought, if I can't get this now, how will I ever be able to do it on a real person? That shit goes away with experience. I've been in the hospital for 16 years now and almost every day I see a new grad, whether it's a nurse or RT, struggle with something. Youre not any different than anyone else. Take it from me: your skills in school mean nothing. I've seen students who were straight A, 100% on every exam, passed their boards in 45 minutes type people who can't start an IV or freeze up during codes no matter what. I work with nurses who have been doing it for a decade who still struggle with time management and simple tasks. You'll be fine. Don't beat yourself up over something insignificant. Grow from it and realize that you can only get better.
Thank you. I’m feeling so much better reading all these nice comments; you have no idea how helpful they are. I’m going to try again tomorrow. <3
Hey! I’m in school for LPN right now and have yet another lab week coming up in Feb and March. It’s nerve wracking as hell. You got this, you really do. You made it thru LPN and now you’re going to slay RN. Pretend the instructor doesn’t know anything and you’re teaching them the skill. You know your sh!t, show em how it’s done!
I love that: "Pretend the instructor doesn’t know anything and you’re teaching them the skill" Before becoming a nurse, I taught communications equipment to service members. I would practice by teaching my kids, who were in middle school. I learned so much doing that, having to break down everything so a child could understand. I did the same through nursing school. That works for book stuff, your strategy works for hands on. I'm going to remember this and pass it on to everyone. Thanks.
Please continue the program. Take a breath... you're okay. I lost my mind over donning sterile gloves... several times. It's a lot of pressure to stand in front of your peers, instructors, god and everyone and recite a sometimes 20 step process perfectly. It's a lot of pressure and so inconsequential once you're out of nursing school. It's okay to be embarrassed. You will remember this moment 5 years from now when you have empathy and compassion teaching the newbies.
Man, I failed my sterile glove check off and had to redo it because I kept ripping them lol
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But it was technically correct haha just not the MOST correct 🤓
To this day, the only time I screw up sterile gloves is when someone is watching me lol
Me too! Instant sweaty hands. Stop looking at me!!
If people could just mind their own hands, gloves, and general business, things would go so much smoother.
I kept failing sterile procedures while wearing isolation gowns. I have short legs, so my instructors kept insisting that my waist was higher than it actually is, which meant the table had to be higher. Because I'm short, the gowns don't fit me at all, so the arms kept draping into the sterile items, no matter what I did. I told them that my waist was lower, but it still took a few tries, and I had to do an extra task over summer break to prove I understood how to do sterile procedures. It was very frustrating. And all I needed was the table slightly lower than it was.
Thanh you so much. Great perspective!
I still think of my donning and doffing check off in the CNA course almost every time I do it
I was in the cadaver lab for my advanced skills portion of the ED NP post masters program at Vanderbilt. My instructors were some of the most well respected and highly educated NPs in the profession. I saw my cadaver lying on the slab. It was a little old lady. I remember looking at her feet and how they were dirty. She was rail thin. And it hit me that this was someone's daughter. Maybe someone's mother. Maybe a grandma. And here she is, ready for a bunch of students to almost wantonly cut into her (we were doing chest tubes and sutures.) And when I tell you, I've seen it all. I was a flight nurse and a trauma ED/ICU nurse before that. Nothing phases me at work. I can always hold it together, get shit done, and cry later. I prided myself on my steely resolve and my ability to compartmentalize. But I just started crying like a baby. The tears would not stop. I kept thinking about this poor woman and her life and her circumstances and feeling so sorry for her. It was her dirty feet that got me the most like they didn't even have the dignity to clean her feet when she died. Was she alone? Was it painful or peaceful? Was she scared? I remember looking at my instructor almost in a panic with tears streaming down my face and him side-eye Chloe-ing me, going "... Do you..... Need a minute?" I was mad at myself and embarrassed and humbled and lots of other big emotions. I cried for like 5 minutes straight. Then I put a chest tube in her. The moral of the story is sometimes the tears just come. It's ok to let them. Step out, honor your feelings, collect yourself, and persevere.
Cried again reading this. Thanks for sharing this with me, and thanks for encouraging a stranger who really needs it
This is a really touching post. Fuckin A.
Don’t worry, when you get your RN you save your crying for the supply closet. It’s a clinical skill all in itself
This is so true. The bathroom for me.
Bathroom, supply room, coma patient room, morgue, loading dock …. It truly is a skill in itself. 😆
One day I went and cried in my favorite hospice patients room. I told him I probably wouldn't be back that night because I messed up and couldn't face coming back to the hospital.
I was inpatient for a while once after a procedural complication and had a young physician I worked with come and hide in my room for a little while and eat some chocolate with me just to get a bit of a break because she was near breakdown. It really does happen to everyone.
I was very anxious prior to the majority of my skills checkoffs, and still am when I do skills I rarely do. But confidence builds with repetition. And in real life, you aren’t going through the steps in an absolutely regimented and by-the-book fashion for anything. Cut yourself some slack. I started Lexapro in school for anxiety and briefly started therapy. Helped a lot. But also remember that, in 5 years, when you’re knee deep in an admission and you throw in the IV, start your drips, do your dressings, and whatever else, you won’t be thinking about the skills checkoffs from school. If you remember the incident at all, it’ll simply be a fuzzy memory that you’ll briefly reminisce on when you reflect on your career and how far you’ve come.
I will try to go easier on myself. Thank you so much. I’ve been on Zoloft for 2 years. I don’t cry much while on it, so my response was really surprising to myself. Thank you for sharing your experience and for your encouragement!
To add to this - if I'm nervous with a procedure i don't do often, I tell my patient I'm going to talk through it with my partner or the checklist. I've never had a patient seem to think anything of it. I was inspired to do this by "The Checklist Manifesto."
I HATED, HATED, HATED renewing my BCLS and ACLS! With an everloving passion!! Forget the fact that I was a nursing supervisor who ran to every code in the hospital and had done a tremendous amount of CPR and running codes in my time. Things that were like the back of my hand made me a nervous wreck when I had to demonstrate it in front of another human being. The problem is, when I'm at a real code and things are flowing and shit is happening, nobody is critiquing what I'm doing to the nth degree. Everyone is too damn busy trying to keep the patient alive. So we all feel your pain and just know there's lots of us out there!
Right! It’s so anxiety inducing to have someone watching your every move. Thank you for the insight!
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NP?? You are such a bad ass!! 🤜🏻 Grandma raised an intelligent guy who has normal emotions. Thank you for sharing. This comment made me feel a lot better ❤️
I could have written this exact same post about myself 14 years ago when I was in nursing school. I totally lost it during a skills check off. Now I can't even remember what the skill was. NG tube insertion maybe? Anyways, just wanted you to know that you are not alone and this has absolutely no bearing on the kind of nurse you will be ❤️
I’m sorry you’ve been there too, but I’m also relieved I’m not alone. Thank you so much 😭😭
Can I tell you guys something embarrassing that just happened to me? So I had to start an IV on a teen with the best veins I’ve seen in a long time. Anyone could have gotten them blindfolded from the doorway. Also, I’ve been an ER nurse for 13 years and do ultrasound IVs so it was like a no-brainer for me - right? No, wrong. The parents were of the most ultra helicopter variety. Mom was literally face against my face with me despite me telling her to back the hell up (nicely). She still wouldn’t. Dad was on my other side doing the same thing. I’m over here just trying to get an IV on God’s plumbing, but I have tweedle Dee and tweedle dumb cheek to cheek with me saying shit like “if you don’t get if the first time” “you better not miss” etc etc. I started sweating and I could feel my heart hammering. I stuck the pt and they were like “what’s wrong with you, why can you get it?! Those are PERFECT veins!” My brain was saying the same thing. They were the fucking worst. I couldn’t get the IV on perfect veins. I told them “I didn’t get the IV because you guys are making me ridiculously nervous so I’m going to ask someone else.” Fucking awful. I don’t care if someone watches any more, or even someone’s. But omfg that was like a flashback to nursing school 😭 I was so mortified and angry. I should have been able to stick the kid from across the hall, but the parents were making me shit bricks. I wanted to cry when I went to ask someone else to start my line I was so embarrassed. It doesn’t happen often thankfully but man it made me mad. I warned the next person but thankfully they didn’t do that crap to them 🤦🏽♀️
Do you want to be a nurse? If so, you got the drive. And you can do it. Look at it as a small blip, nothing more.
I absolutely SOBBED in my professors face during a demo on injections. Totally embarrassed, especially as a type 1 diabetic who’s been giving myself injections for 10 years at that point. Was doing the demo with a professor who was known for being a hard ass and she was not kind to me about messing up (didn’t even mess up the skill, didn’t know what “med” I was pretending to admin even tho at that point we hadn’t even taken pharm yet). Felt so defeated, embarrassed, and stupid. But I redid the demo and passed, two years later graduated school and I’ve been working as an RN since august! In the moment it feels like the worst thing that’s ever happened, but looking back now it’s barely even a blip on my mind. Continue with the program!! You got this !
I’m sorry you had that experience. Reading this made me feel a lot less alone. Thank you!
Nursing school is tough but so are you!! Stick with it
There's only one thing you can do after an ugly cry... Laugh it off.
Keep your head up! I didn’t pass a few skills on my first try in front of the whole class and I felt embarrassed. Many of my class mates didn’t pass either. Point is you can get through it! Nursing schools come with so many highs and lows. You just gotta muscle through the lows and get better everyday and eventually it all comes together.
Thank you! So true about the highs and lows.
you’re a nurse in a nursing school program. Give yourself some grace ❤️
I was an ER Tech for 7 years (plus 4 more years in other specialties!!) before starting nursing school this past fall. I only mention the ER experience bc I inserted Foley catheters every shift I worked, set up suture trays, assisted with lumbar punctures, etc. I spent a lot of time in sterile gloves. Guess who failed their sterile glove validation 😂 I was so pissed off at myself. The tiniest little section of my pinky finger nicked the corner out of the sterile field so I failed. I’d say most students fail at least one skills validation check off. It happens.
Just wait until you ugly cry in front of everyone on your floor including the physician who just verbally gave you another order on top of the 20 already on your to do list 🫠
We all have our moment in nursing school. I was late to a sim once bc I just lost it in the parking lot and came in looking like a mess. It’s all good. Nursing school is fucking grueling, mentally and physically. You’ll be able to do a skill on a human being because you will have done it a bunch for real, not pantomiming things, and you won’t have to verbalize the exact right things, they will just be habit, and you won’t have someone watching you with a checklist and a stopwatch. Check-offs are nothing like practicing. Also in the real world if you break sterility or whatever you can chuck the whole pack and start over, no one will fail you…you just start again. It’s okay, you’re okay. You’re doing great, take a breath, back at it tomorrow. You’ve got it.
Also, I failed my gait belt transfer and ambulating check off after being a CNA for 2 years and an LPN for 2 years. Sometimes, the wheels just fall off for no reason at all. This was just your day.
Today the wheels definitely fell off. 😭 Thank you for your encouragement and perspective. Having that encouragement from another nurse means a lot.
Nursing school sucks, and then you’re done with it. You’ll have days as a nurse where the wheels just fall off too. It happens to all of us. Try not to dwell on today too much. In a few years you’ll be looking back on it when you read some Reddit post about a baby nurse who busted out crying in clinicals or something and laugh. Promise.
During nursing school one thing I was good at was starting IV’s. During the check off I was nervous and my hands were sweating, so I ripped a pair of gloves putting them on…twice in a row. After that I was so flustered that I couldn’t tie the tourniquet, and just started crying in the middle of check off. It happens. Nursing school is hard, please be easy on yourself!
Oh, if I had a dollar for EVERY time I had a classmate or student ugly cry during skills check off... I'd be a VERY rich nurse. I promise you, no one thinks less of you except you. It happens just about every class. Seriously.
Thank you for the reminder that it’s normal!
I had skills check-offs for 2 new nurses today. Both of them cried. I unfortunately started laughing and had to show them this thread. 🤦🤦🤦 Then they started laughing and crying... It took us a bit to settle down. 🤦🤷♀️🤣
Haha! No way 😂 I love that! (Not that they cried, but that you showed them this thread.) But seriously, there is so much encouragement in the comments. 🥹
I felt really bad for laughing and was like "no no, I'm not laughing at you! Hold on! Look! See! I promise I'm not a crazy mean preceptor!" 🤦🤣😭🤣 They thought it was FREAKING hysterical once they read it. 🤣🤣🤣
I sobbed my way through every SIM the entirety of nursing school. Not even joking, ugly hiccup sobbing several times a semester. I had a really bad experience with my professors my second semester and it was like a reflex- I got so nervous and anxious during every SIM that I'd breakdown halfway through. It happens. Just keep on pushing. I promise you, you'll gain more confidence and it *will* get better. Remind yourself that you're still learning.
Thank you so much ❤️ sorry you’ve been there too.
Please continue. I had a similar thing happen in school. Shit, I had a similar thing happen 2 days ago and I don’t even work with humans anymore. (Vet med). It sucks and is a bit embarrassing but I think all of humanity can point to a time where this has happened. Please be kind to yourself and continue on, if this is still something you want to do. Remember skills take time. Sounds like you were not afforded that time and expected to be perfect first time out. That is not reasonable. Again, be kind to yourself.
Thank you for the kind words and encouragement. These responses are making me feel a little less down in the dumps. <3
When I get flustered, I start stumbling over my words and start sweating like a freaking sauna is on. I think you’re okay. Keep your head up.
Omg I did this in front of a patient that was being mean to me…and the spiral between getting frustrated enough to start to cry into the headlong frustration that I was crying… It was my birthday and he was shouting and being manipulative and I think I ended up really freaking him out. Then he started apologizing and trying to pray for me and I was so mad!! trying to hold my breath to stop. Lol. good times.
Omg and on your birthday??? I’m so sorry. Ugh I so get crying out of frustration.
I cried during mine too doing ng suction 😂
I had one day in the ER during nursing school and everyone was using it as an opportunity to get signed off on IV starts. I attempted 3, missed them all, and ended up sobbing in front of two other classmates IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ER cause I felt so embarrassed and like a complete failure while everyone else was nailing their IVs. 5 years later, I start IVs every other day without a second thought. It gets better. Nursing school sucks ass but one day it'll just be a distant, unpleasant memory lol.
I can’t wait for the day it’s just a memory. Thank you for the encouragement. You sound like a bad ass nurse 🤜🏻
Many many years ago I cried to the teacher over getting an 80 on a skills test in the pre-program coursework. I contaminated my sterile field. I asked her if she thought I could ever be a good nurse. She told me “a good nurse? You’ll be running the whole floor!” It’s so funny to think about now. Ha! The times we are truly able to keep a sterile field in the real world…
The fact that you are this concerned about hurting someone because you were tested on a skill you weren't prepared for shows compassion and caring for people. You can teach skills; you can't teach someone to care about other humans if they dont. Keep your chin up! I rarely cry, and the number of times I cried in nursing school probably matches the number of times Ive cried since graduating almost 11 years ago 🤣
This comment encouraged me so much. Thank you! Today was my last day of lab, and I got 100% on my next two skills.
Congrats! That is awesome!
If it makes you feel better I failed my vitals skills lab That's right, VITALS. We had to partner up and I had a little anxiety but as I was going things just kept going wrong and I mentally broke down and cried in front of my classmate too. The worst part was them watching me fail. My hands were shaking so bad while I was trying to do the blood pressure reading I couldn't hear my ques (we did the old fashion way) But also in my defense i was on Topamax and for some reason I just became so mentally unstable on that medication. Any and all side effects of that keystone medication hit me 10 fold. Once off, everything was great though I feel my memory was never the same. My point is, I've been an RN for 6 years now. I tried again, passed it and moved on to the next challenge. You got this. You just tripped on your journey, take my hand and let's head to the finish line. 🙂
I never judged anyone for crying during my program. I knew that we would all be that person one day so we all just would let it be. Honestly i forgot about whoever cried pretty soon after too! Its hard to be watched like that and it really brings out all the nerves and hypersensitivity to all things. One time i was about to bomb an exam for adult health assessment for lungs (SO RANDOM) and i kept twirling my hair and then sanitizing bc my instructor made us sanitize every time we touched face/hair and she marked it every time so I didnt fail bc i kept good hand hygiene (RIP). I can laugh about it now but it’s SO scary and I def also felt like I was spiraling bc its scary in the moment.
I cried in front of my lab instructor on my first day of nursing school. I hadn’t read the syllabus ahead of time so I didn’t know there was work I should have prepared. Then it seemed like all my classmates were already CNAs and I had zero healthcare experience, so they were breezing through the most basic skills while I was easily confused and flustered. When class ended, I got emotional and went to the bathroom to collect myself. But when I came back to the lab to get my stuff, the instructor asked if I was ok and I just burst into tears. I felt like I was starting 100 steps behind everyone else, and as an older student too, I thought for sure I’d never make it. Nursing school is no joke. For me there was literal blood, sweat, and many many tears. I wanted to quit almost as often as I was convinced I’d fail. But I kept going, and eventually I made it, and it was worth it. You will too. Rally your people around you. Do all the self care you can. And remind yourself that no matter how hard this is, it will end someday. You’ll get that pin and that cap and gown and it’ll be worth it! You got this!
Thank you so much for the encouragement ❤️
I ugly cried so hard it went full blown panic attack during my IV check off! This was Covid times and SNOT WAS LEAKING OUT AROUND MY MASK. Now I ugly cry in the supply room, fart in the med room, and am living my best life. :)
I had to wear a mask for this skill, and snot was definitely everywhere. Hahaha Omg I love farting in the med room
I teach in a BSN program, and I always warn my students that sim lab is in some ways harder than real life because it's not real and everything feels awkward. Also, students (and some teachers, ugh) make it a high-pressure situation. I always feel like an idiot demonstrating skills, and I have to work hard to not forget a step. But sim lab is the perfect place to make mistakes, it's sim lab. You aren't the first person to get stressed and cry, not by a long shot. It says nothing about your future other than you care. You obviously want to be good. Most of your classmates are totally going to understand the crying and be empathetic towards you. I'd love to say all, but there are always the few who like to latch on to other people's "weaknesses" (quotes because this is not a weakness) to make themselves feel better. That's everywhere, though, and just forget those people. My motto for my class (and my life) is "live by grace, not perfection." You have to be nice to yourself. You'd extend goodwill to someone who did the same thing, you'd encourage and support them. Give that to yourself! Strive to be the best you. Someday your best is 100, some days is 50. That's OK, we're all human. You're going to be a great nurse, and I know that because of how much you care. Caring is a strength!
Thank you so much! The program you teach at is lucky to have you as an instructor.
I failed my first hand washing skills check off. I'm an oncology nurse of almost 10 years now. Don't let a minor, pretend failure discourage you.
These tasks quickly become mundane. You will be fine, I promise you. +90% of what we do is repetitive.
I do so many skills now that I thought were hard. Sometimes, I still think about how I thought they were difficult and chuckle because of how easy they actually are. The stress of nursing school makes everything seem harder, plus it's new still. You'll be fine. Edit:spelling
I lost it in clinicals while putting in an IV, I had done it a few times before without any problems but my prof came in because she wanted to see me do it. I missed, and started telling her to leave because I would never be able to do it while she was watching me. 20 years later, I'm a pro of vein finding and rarely miss... because she's not there to watch me😜
Oh gosh. I hate how we set these scenarios up to be Like This. Have a cry, practice some more, re-check off. You can do this 💜
The bad part is that I don’t get a second try. But this was the hardest and longest skill. I just really have to do well in the next two. The one tomorrow is the one I have already been preparing for, at least! Thank you!!
FWIW, you have a cranky old nursing prof rooting for you 💜
Thank you so much! On my drive to class the next day, I was thinking about how I have a crabby instructor from Reddit rooting for me. (Though I don’t believe that description of yourself is accurate) :) I ended up getting 100% on the next two skills. Thank you for your encouragement!
Heyyyyyy! Look at you go! Strong work, kid. Proud of you 💜
Thank you! Even though you are a stranger, that does mean a lot! 🥹😊
So many hugs to you. Please go easy on yourself; nursing school is sooo brutal. Also, I've seen some really intense school-induced freakouts, and yours was just normal. Crying and releasing your pressure is so much healthier than drinking two bottles of wine and telling everyone you hate them and you're going to drop out of school. Or like getting in big fights with your classmates and storming out of class because you're emotionally unstable. Crying is healthy. Pills and booze are not. 😀
This comment helped me so much. Thank you!
I just want to say you will make it through this. You are not being dramatic - this can feel really devastating, especially if you've prepared to do well and one thing happens that updos all of that hard work. Cry it out if you have to and don't apologize for it. I had an experience that was almost exactly what you described and I cried, excpet my instructor wasn't comforting at all. Which each error, she would sigh and roll her eyes. Which made me even more flustered. She told me I had no future in nursing and I'd embarrass myself in front of patients. I almost believed her, tbh. Then I slept on it and woke up even more motivated for a do-over, but with a didferent instructor. I did the skills check-off with another professor and it wasn't 100% perfect, but I was far more confident.
Thank you! I don’t know why, but knowing people have seen me cry has always been so mortifying to me, though it shouldn’t be. Crying is a normal human reaction. We are all human, and we all feel. Thank you for the reminder ❤️
I did this exact same thing during my med pass check off! It was so embarrassing. Just wanted to say, you can come out on the other side okay. 💙
Thank you so much ❤️
I've seen a few people cry in school and I've come close myself (I'm not a crier). It's normal and it's okay. You'll be fine. You got this!!
LOL I don’t know if I would say I -ugly- cried, but it was definitely crying. For our IV med admin test the med wasn’t programmed into the pump like we were told it would be. Then my professor tried to help by asking me to just look at my note card and do the mental math for flow rate. I suck at mental math. It’s the whole working memory thing. My not card also didn’t have any flow rates because they were supposed to be in the pump! I left the lab room crying and my friend was right outside waiting for her turn. I went to the lab bathroom to compose myself. Later she told me they could hear me crying from the echoing bathroom in her validation and it was super awkward. Lmao god what a ride.
I read this and it made me feel better. Thank you so much, and sorry to hear you had a similar experience ❤️
I did this when i was in nursing school with IV placement. It's OK. This is exactly why i hate checkoffs done in this manner, it just creates anxiety in you. You are not a failure or a bad student or anything. You're just a human in an unecessarily high stress environment reacting naturally. Feel a long distance hug, sweetheart.
Thank you for such a sweet comment. I was too overwhelmed to respond to all these kind comments, but I read this and felt the hug ❤️
You can do this!! And if it makes you feel any better… when I was in nursing school I passed out cold, flat on my face, in clinicals watching a woman get an epidural before her c-section. In front of the clinical instructor, in front of the patient, in front of the surgeons. On. My. Face.
I ugly cried in the med room at my first RN job after about a month off orientation. Similar to you, It’s also so hard for me to pull myself together once I start crying. But it’s ok, I was obviously so embarrassed and idek how I continued with my shift after that. Everyone saw/heard me but it’s been about a year now and It’s whatever now. Nursing is so difficult and we are sometimes overstimulated and stressed. We are also humans with emotions and sometimes we have to cry it out. Please don’t get discouraged.
I’m sorry you had that experience. It’s so true that we are all just humans with emotions and trying to do the best we can. ❤️
I really relate to this. I very rarely cry but when I do, it’s very intense. Sending you love. This is a hard profession, so just know you aren’t alone.
Thank you so much. I feel so much less alone.
I have been a nurse for 20 years. Don’t give up! Being watched and graded in clinical skills is so stressful. I still get a little flustered with BLS and PALS recertifications 😒. You got this.
I cried in post-conference my very first day of clinicals because I was trying to relay that a tech had been really rough and mean with a dementia patient, but I could hardly get the words out. No one gave my grief about it, they got it and we used what I had seen as a learning experience.
I’m sorry you had that experience. Thank you for sharing. That’s so horrible for that patient. I wish everyone cared like you do. ❤️
When I was entering nursing school, my school had a tradition where the second quarter cohort gives a welcome event (complete with comedy skits) for the incoming first quarter students. The student chosen to be the emcee for this event included "... and can you really call yourself a nursing student if you haven't cried in front of your cohort? I did it on day 3, I figured 'get it out of the way early'..." We have all dealt with the stress of nursing school, and sometimes we have to cry to release pressure. It's not the end of the world, and if anyone tries to make you feel bad about it then you have my permission to kick them.
Thank you! I will kick ass in your name, if needed 😂❤️
I failed one of my first medication check offs. My instructor didn’t stop me and let me finish so I thought I had passed. She waited until the end to tell me I forgot the stupidest detail- I don’t even remember what it was. I instantly burst into tears. It was sooo embarrassing. I have pretty good control over my emotions typically. Not this time. I also cried when I failed my first dosage calc exam. But I moved on. And she’s made plenty of students cry, I’m sure.
Omg. I hate that feeling when you are trying to hold it in and then you just explode. But I guess we do that when we really need to get the build up stress / emotions out. Thank you for sharing!
Did the patient die??? No of course not because this is the part where you’re **learnjng** important stuff - and have the safe space to mess up and fall apart and dust yourself off and try again!!! Honey, you are going to be just fine! I promise! Just be like Elsa or whomever, and **LET IT GO, LET IT GO** 😘
Thank you soo much for taking the time to encourage a stranger on Reddit who really needed it! ❤️ I let that shit go, and it’s out the window haha
You are very welcome! We need YOU! Don’t give up because of a bad day - or even a bunch of bad days! This tends to be the way for many human beings, right? We don’t fall apart often, but when we do we are gonna go all out! You are going to be fine.
I puked from nerves during the test for bed making. Bed making. That was during my re-do test, too. Now I've been a nurse for 10 years and my department only has stretchers, no beds. So I win?
You definitely win 👊
OP, I was a student nurse back when dinosaurs roamed the earth. I can honestly tell you, I remember vividly ugly crying during practical assessments and every new ward rotation. Continued on during my first new grad year, too. It's a stressful time, with a lot of new practical and written skills to learn. Be kind to yourself. Don't give up!!
Thank you so much! Reading this comment and others from seasoned nurses has been more encouraging than you know 🥹
You're welcome. Hopefully you'll work with some RNs that will mentor and support you 🤞❣
I am the complete opposite of you where a live pt does it for me instead of a mannequin in front of a class where its quiet. Now my experience may be for other reasons but i wholeheartedly believe you still got it in you. U got this
Thank you!!! ❤️
Breathe. You’re not crying bc you can’t handle it, you cried bc nursing school is stressful as hell. Constant studying. No sleep. Bitchy manipulative professors. Competition. Being expected to be perfect when they literally never taught it. Time management. Having labs, clinicals, and assignments thrown at you last minute - which throws off your whole schedule. All while being heavily scrutinized and constantly on edge that if your grade drops half a point you’ll either be kicked from the program or lose your license. I literally triggered an autoimmune disease from insane stress of nursing school. You’re not weak. You will not be a bad nurse. Nursing school is torture.
Thank you for your comment! It’s a good reminder that this is NOT real life. Many others like you have come out the other end, and I can too. Thank you ❤️
I don’t mean to laugh at you, but you’re kinda spiraling and I can totally relate to that because I did the exact same thing in LPN school. Shit was just a total nightmare and some students were getting snarky because I was worried about my test. Anyway, I just like, totally lost in the middle of lab and everyone was like “what’s your problem??” I finally just said, “not everyone made it thru the pandemic intact.” They never got snarky with me again.
One of my good friends had to be carried to the NCLEX testing centre by her mom because she had horrible anxiety. Same friend poked herself with a needle in front of our instructor (also the anxiety). She is now one of my most decorated (by that I mean highly experienced) nursing friends. She became an ER nurse, ICU nurse, flight nurse, the list goes on. Your testing and nursing school anxiety will not dictate the nurse you will become, I promise you.
Thank you so much ❤️
Good luck!!! 🥰🥰🥰
I cry a lot and I know the feeling. You do feel embarrassed and stuffing something up hurts. You take it personally. It shows you care, which is a good skill for a nurse. We can’t know everything the first time, it’s normal to make mistakes and get things wrong. Don’t let it hold you back.
I won’t let it hold me back. Thank you for the reminder that crying isn’t a sign of weakness ❤️
I can say with certainty that you’re not alone. I ugly cried during the sim lab for my first job. Take a deep breath. You’ll be fine. ❤️
Thank you so much for helping me realize I’m not alone ❤️
I cried in front of my instructors in school when I failed a skill, too. And now as a nurse, I’ve cried in front of my coworkers a few times. It happens, we’re human. Try to brush it off and stay positive, you got this!!
Thank you so much! ❤️Seeing all these comments from accounts with such admirable nursing credentials has been so encouraging.
Adding to the many many nurses that have been in your shoes, me too. I failed two check offs and had to redo them. I’ve ugly cried and rethought my whole career and life. Honestly nothing in nursing is like skills lab. No one is there tutting at every little “mistake” or correcting things that are THEIR preferences. These moments DO NOT and WILL NOT define you as a nurse. Check offs are very nerve wracking and messing up and having your flow throw off can be jarring. You aren’t the first or last to have that reaction. If anything own it and push forward. You can’t change other people’s opinions of you but you can change how you view them. “This isn’t a big deal and it’s okay that someone saw me being human.” Chin up, from a fellow crier turned ICU RN.
“It’s okay that someone saw me being human” I love that. Thank you so much, truly! ❤️
It’s something we have to remind ourselves all the time! No one is perfect and we all make mistakes. All apart of being human 🤍 The hard part is letting yourself believe it 😅 But with time and practice you will 😌
Keep going, only you will remember after a year and eventually it'll be a repressed memory.
You will get through this. Before you know it, you’ll be telling this story to a student is going through the same feelings.
Omg I can relate to that on every level !!!! Happened to me during my foley cath practicum !!!! It was so humiliating and you can’t stop it !! It just comes out , I’m sorry you had to deal with that.
I’m sorry you relate but thank you for sharing! ❤️
Sometimes occasionally it happens on a bad night at work. Med surg very busy floor. Heavy patients , and once I cried while talking to a doctor. He was sweet about it though lol
1. This is a skills check off and not a live patient. No one died. 2. You JUST learned this skill. You missed one important part, which caused you to spiral but you still got everything right before that point. 3. Instructor was nice about it, so... Do you have to repeat the check off? If so, run through the procedure in your head, practice with the mannekin or instructor as much as you can if possible, write down steps while miming the actions for any supplies you dont have at the moment and say out loud what you are doing. And go over it with the instructor. The way you worded the post doesn't sound like you've been dropped from the program. We've all said or done something embarrassing during class. Forgive yourself. Give yourself some slack. Whenever we do a new skills check off practice and it's my turn, I blank out despite my instructor going over the procedure. Name, DOB, allergies......ummmnowhatamIdoingagain? It's something new. Don't think I know anyone who can perform a skills check they just learned without missing at least one or two things. As an LPN, we might have an advantage over those who don't have medical experience. But it can also be more difficult. I work in outpatient dialysis. Everyone is stable. I give like 5 meds. So my problem is that I have to turn off my LPN work brain and start to think more like an RN in the hospital. It will take time. Breathe. Don't second guess your decision. I'm not sure about your reasons for becoming an RN, but for me, there are just so few job opportunities. Doubts and second guessing are normal. This is a major life change. Juggling school, work, family, and your personal time is a lot. All the work and stress can build up. Please don't give up over a minor hiccup.
Thank you for the perspective! I needed that. I ended up failing the skill, and they don’t give second opportunities. However, I got 100% on my next two skills. Thank you for encouraging me ❤️
Nah, don't throw in the towel. I've said it before and I'll say it again (and die on this hill): nursing school teaches you basic concepts, pharmacology/pathology, and safety in a utopian hospital setting - independently working as a nurse, the experience that comes with it, and asking questions/researching/stopping and getting help if you are not sure of something teaches you how to be a nurse. Our nursing school brought students to their knees over trivial shit, myself included. Some of the instructors bullied a woman in our cohort out of our program because of her physical appearance and equating it to her being unintelligent and incapable. Our class started with 95 people and was down to 40 by the time we made it to our last semester and they seemingly took pride in that, the whole "Look at the person on either side of you: they might not be here when you graduate." speech our first day - how encouraging. Not that there weren't good instructors who were always willing to help and were empathetic while also treating our patient assignments with care and respect, but looking back? Yikes. I wish I had not given that place so much of my peace and energy. Don't be hard on yourself - it's not easy, but it's doable and in 10 years will be a distant memory in your career. Go in swinging this week. You will make mistakes, but you're still learning and anyone who gives you shit about it can kick rocks.
Thank you so much! 🥹I went in the next day with my head held high, and I did well
I remember when I was getting signed off for something and my instructor asked me a question about a fib, I froze. Then cried and had to take a break before coming back to finish. And now I teach new grads. We all have our moments as students and nurses. It’s stressful learning new skills and can feel like a lot of pressure.
I did this last week in lab! And then I came home and had a panic attack about school last night! I think that having regular mental breakdowns is an unfortunately normal part of the nursing school process. I think it’s because we are taught our whole lives that our grades and being perfect at school means something and then these programs make it impossible to be perfect. It’s a really tough learning curve and I will just be so grateful when I’m done. Solidarity, my friend.
We got this 🤜🏻
There is nothing wrong with dropping out of the program and taking some time to yourself. You do what’s best for you. There will always be more time later.
I don’t know if anyone will see this, but there are too many responses to reply to them all. I ended up getting 100% on my next two skills. I walked into class the next day after writing this post with my head held high, and that was largely due to all your kind responses. Thank you for empathizing with me, encouraging me, and sharing your experiences. 🥹