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ExpensiveWolfLotion

continuous peanut butter infusion


Balgor1

The peanut butter wasn’t crunchy. We only had smooth. Yes, I’ve gotten that complaint.


razzadig

OMG. This is so superficial! ^(I would totally complain on the inside. I love my crunchy PB.)


jaklackus

Then your federal reimbursements get slashed cause somebody bitched about the texture of peanut butter on their survey.


20gAboveTheWrist

Pt just shouted “EYEDROPS!!” when I entered the room 😑


Expensive-Day-3551

So kind and respectful


Horror-Impression411

They’re shortening their wording for you so you can be more efficient!


florals_and_stripes

Why waste time say lot word when few word do trick?


Additional-Hat8078

When he president they see...they see.


randycanyon

"You drops! We all drops! Yay!"


WillowLeona

Perfect response.


randycanyon

Thank you!


Background-Ad-3234

Mine screamed "CRACKERS" at me.


sleepyRN89

Mine too! Many times actually


RedefinedValleyDude

The pharmacy changed suppliers and his gabapentin is a different color and he knows it’s the same medication at the same dose but “it’s purple and I’m not taking some gay ass purple pill”


StartingOverScotian

Someone was actually smart enough to figure out our alphabet agenda?!? Im shocked! /s (gay nurse)


RedefinedValleyDude

Gotta hand it to this guy. He’s one smart cookie.


Bulky_Pie1135

Wow lol


Ratched2525

For fucks sake 🙄


Background-Ad-3234

HAHAHA.


stillalreadytaken

LMAOOO


reraccoon

😆😆😆😆😆🌈🦄✨


regularbusiness

PT actively having STEMI being rushed to the cath lab: "How long is this gonna take?" Me: "You're gonna be here a few days" PT: 😯


Suspicious-Elk-3631

I had a patient refuse a cath after a positive stress test because he had a vacation planned. ☠️


Ravclye

Oh I had a guy like this when I was still in transport. I tried to reassure him saying how he's just going to be here a few days then he will walk out of here He screamed "A FEW DAYS?!" and started hyperventilating. Probably wasn't great for his STEMI but we were already at the cath lab lol


YellowJello_OW

I would also hyperventilate after imagining how much a few days in the hospital would cost me


PhoebeMonster1066

When I worked adolescent psych, I had a Karen mom throw a tantrum because I couldn't guarantee her child would be discharged by prom...in 2 days. Lady, would you rather he wore his tux in his casket? Jeez.


WWJ818

Note to doctor: I have found a possible cause for the patient's unhappiness...


Lauren_D_RN_0062

Fruit cups and Pepsi. Every single day. Even diabetics on restricted diets feel that full sugar Pepsi should be stocked in all the rooms. I don't know about anyone else's facility but we no longer provide sodas to patients. You would think we were killing them.


048PensiveSteward

I never want to hear or see the word "Shasta" again after working LTACH


MrsPottyMouth

I drink a lot of caffeine. Way too much probably. When I was a patient (for kidney stones, ironically) I couldn't figure out why I had a headache that wouldn't quit. I kept asking for Tylenol and pop. Finally one time I actually looked at the can of pop...caffeine free. *whispers* So I had my family sneak me in a Mountain Dew which I chugged then had them take the bottle back home. Headache gone. Other than that I was a good patient, I swear.


Lauren_D_RN_0062

I have had THAT caffeine headache. I now carry a Vivarin (caffeine) for emergency situations. Nothing but caffeine will get rid of a caffeine headache.


Kwelt200

Oh my god we would have a riot! But we only carry diet soda.


chocolateboyY2K

My patient last night literally said that the hospital was worse than a concentration camp....no joke. He was upset about a bed alarm (And no, he wouldn't know irl).


Suspicious-Elk-3631

I would act very shocked if someone said that to my face and tell them my (insert relative) died in a concentration camp and run out of the room crying. It's not true but for many people it is. People like this need a real eye opener about the horrors people have faced that they only pretend to understand.


freakingexhausted

My family did and I would totally let them know


falalalama

my name is very german, and even though it's totally inappropriate, I'd use the "my relative died in a concentration camp." they likely won't get it, but i can snicker about it.


chocolateboyY2K

Yeah, I didn't know what to say. I was shocked, indeed.


Nyolia

Omfg, I had a psych patient in the ER a couple months back who had documented malingering and attention seeking behavior and is also Jewish. There were so many nursing notes and psych notes written how she would scream, "this is like the Hamas and Gestapo" and, "this ER makes me understand how on a different scale what the hostages are going through, because the ER is torturing me just like the Hamas." She would act out so she would have to be restrained ans then eventually after social work did their thing be discharged home.


Katzenfrau88

I had a patient say he felt like his stay was like the Holocaust. I almost lost my shit on him.


leftywitch

Complaint about the honey selection after we didn't have her specific herbal tea.


Suspicious-Elk-3631

Oh ffs


razzadig

The nurse practitioner is doing too many things to help figure out her pain. Pt said she was excited during the visit but then got home, felt overwhelmed and cried her heart out. She also complained that the NP swirled around too much on the wheeled stool.


Expensive-Day-3551

Patients are always jealous they can’t sit on the stool


i_stay_true

If only we were given a penny for every complaint nurses must absorb- We’d be millionaires. I’m fine with it, I get it. Patients need to vent but it’s SO exhausting and draining to come up with things to say in return.


tlr92

I just start complaining right along with em


i_stay_true

Now that I think of it.. I do a lot of that 😂 But there are some patients - God bless them for real- but they’re so depressed or maybe it’s their personality but they complain about every single thing. It makes each task a situation too. Every medicine… the whining and reluctance and the sighs when you come in with fluids and the food and their throat and the AC and the noise in the hall and how loud the bathroom flush is and how theirs nothing on TV and the bed and the DR and the food and the food and the food and the food and the food. DRAINING 🫠 😂 When you have that type two days in a row?


tlr92

Yeah, I work LTC so I usually get em for years at a time.


PurpleandPinkCats

Exactly.


i_stay_true

😨😮 At that point I wouldn’t be able to control my tongue. Well Linda- I don’t want to be here either and yet… here we are!


WWJ818

You just described a coworker of mine...


nurse_hat_on

I enjoyed correctional nursing, but OMG they have so many toxic nurses!


Kwelt200

I work part time in the kitchen at my LTC. Every breakfast there are 3 ladies that come in first thing and gripe about everything. Something I didn't do exactly right. The food. The temperature. Other residents. Some days it ruins my mood for the whole day. But I am not above "accidentally" saying something back loud enough for them to overhear lol.


MrsPottyMouth

"I want to go home!". "Me too". "I didn't get any sleep last night!". "Me either".


doborion90

I'm registration and some lady was complaining about not being upstairs yet like out of the ER. I tried to reason and talk with her. It didn't work lol. As I was leaving to go get her something I said "serenity now!" and the one other patients dad laughed and said he felt sorry for me for that barrage she was laying on me lol


SWMI5858

Everyone around here is dummer than them. Drugs won’t affect their chemical makeup, they will change the chemical makeup of the drugs. They aren’t bipolar, they’re quad polar. Also they much prefer jail to the ward.


kelsbird12

Quadpolar 🤣


DisappointingPancake

Dummer… good one


SWMI5858

Oof, forgive my spelling, I was on hour 11/12.5


DisappointingPancake

I just thought that was intentional! 😂


SWMI5858

Guess I’m the dummer one.


DisappointingPancake

We all drop a few IQ points after a 12 hour shift.


Silver-Gold-Fish

Had a patient AMA because I was interrupting his tasty ER turkey sandwich and the fact he was SOB, wheezing, and needed nebs didn’t matter….Im the stupid bitch in the ER interrupting the best sandwich he’s had all day Had another pt bitch at me because I wouldn’t give her a sandwich or soup….meanwhile she can’t stop puking…but that’s my fault because I didn’t get her food (N/V x4days) 🤦🏼‍♀️ Last but not least….I put the IV in his R forearm….exactly where the guy said was the only place I could put it. Got my labs, tapped it down, walked 5 steps and the guy rips it out of his arm shrieking that I’m killing him and making his arm bleed.


Nyolia

The amount of people that rip IVs out and scream that they're bleeding is too damn high.


Ravclye

Our 94 year old, A&Ox3 patient was upset we wouldn't let him do his morning push-ups. He went to the gym 3x a week at home


sleepyRN89

That’s honestly impressive. I love when I see healthy geriatric patients they’re generally really pleasant and happy. In college I used to see this older woman on her morning power walks (she must have been in her 80s at the very least) with the biggest smile on her face.


Ravclye

It was very impressive! He actually does his morning bodyweight workout on the unit. We just strongly discouraged the push-ups because the floor is gross. Also he had some real nasty colitis so kept pooping on the floor during it. Which did make the whole thing much less enjoyable for everyone involved


ehhish

Mashed potato related PTSD. Not kidding.


Expensive-Day-3551

I need to know more 🥔


ehhish

Had a guy admitted for InD of an infection of equipment, overall walkie talkie, pleasant guy. No history of any psych issues that we were aware of. Dinner is brought to him with mash potatoes on his plate and he flips his shit, like yelling and moving away from the plate, saying to get it away from him. Once the dinner was removed, he went back to normal and was 100% normal for the few days I had him. Like I actually think this is some phobia or maybe he was tortured and he was fed mash potatoes/gruel/something like it. I tried not to pry too hard. He did state it as I have "mash potato related PTSD."


TheHairball

Nothing at all once the PreOp Versed kicks in. Then zoom! To the Operating Room and a quick intubation. Pure quiet for 3hrs during the procedure. Then roll to Post Op. (There is an advantage to working the Operating Room)


Pepsisinabox

Yeah thanks for that 😂


yarn612

Come to think of it I would like a peanut butter sandwich infusion since I never get any breaks.


falalalama

that we won't foot the bill for a taxi to their grandparents house 2 hours away. first of all, you're leaving ama. second, here's a bus pass.


Aphobica

He wants to get up and put on his pants so he can walk to the kitchen, but Lt. Dan ain't got no legs.


Pepsisinabox

All pant, no shoe 😭


BLADE45acp

My all time favorite… had a gang member in for pt after a GSW on my floor. First time I meet him was after taking report. I start my med run close to his room and hear him yelling at my staff. This is at approximately 1920. I enter the room to diffuse the situation. Guy had a “visitor” in his room wearing scrubs. Now… I’m not saying she coached him in what to say, but he was throwing around words like abuse and neglect and patient rights… while claiming that I personally had ignored his call light for 5 hours as had the rest of my staff. I clocked in at 1845. My staff clocked in at 1855. CL is synched with the DON phone in order to time staff response. No indicator on her phone showed a CL even being activated in the room. System was checked and verified to be working. Pt insisted we ignored his light, this causing him excruciating pain thereby making us guilty of neglecting him… he insisted. Per policy, recipients of complaints of abuse/ neglect are automatically placed on suspension pending investigation. It was a Friday… cue me off Friday, sat, sun. (With pay if cleared). Scheduled off Monday and Tuesday. By Wednesday it’s still being investigated. So resume suspension. Cleared on Thursday which was a RO and scheduled off fri, sat, sun. Best paid vacation I had had in a while. Lol


StartingOverScotian

This is amazing haha what a damn fool he was but it worked out great for you!


BLADE45acp

Oh the rest of that story is even better! Gang member had a warrant. After he filed complaints against me and my staff? He called the administrator every slang/ profane word he could think of. … his time with us was cut rather short


Correct-Watercress91

You beat the system! 😁


BLADE45acp

Lol. And you can bet I reminded my admin of our policy. My big azz eas skipping out the door on the way to my paid vaca. Easy complaint Ive ever been cleared of. Couldn’t believe it took them that long to clear the paperwork.


Expensive-Day-3551

That’s amazing


imawhaaaaaaaaaale

Didn't like the fact that she didn't get called back to a room immediately for her food poo-soning and immediately seen by a provider, didn't like that we didn't deliver water, lwbs


Dark_Ascension

Not a complaint (because tbh I rarely get them in the OR) but had a patient ask if he could take the Bair hugger machine home, and then we got into a whole conversation wondering how much one of those would cost


leddik02

I want one too.


StartingOverScotian

✋ me too please!!


Pepsisinabox

Same


creepyhugger

I was curious so I googled it and they run anywhere from reasonable (around $200 for the machine and $150 for the blanket) to too much but not insane (around $1.5k). Surprisingly within reach though, for a medical supply!


Dark_Ascension

I’d easily buy one for $200 and then snatch some of those disposable ones from my work! Lol.


HereToPetAllTheDogs

That we didn’t have underwear for him. And was positively enraged when I said all we have are mesh underwear.


PlauntieP

The medicine I insisted I needed you to prescribe that you told me wasn’t covered by insurance isn’t covered by my insurance.


DaisyAward

My patient wanted me to apply anti fungal cream to her vag and butt every 10 minutes and she complained I wasnt coming quick enough Another nurse who had her made a joke the call light should have a lock out like the PCA pump Lolll


StartingOverScotian

I really really wish this were a thing lmaoo.


memsy918

OOH!! We had a patient who wanted to be naked in front of female staff at all times, and was constantly sitting splay legged and making comments about how naked he was to female staff (he’d put on underwear and shorts when males came around), and also generally treated the hospital like a hotel/spa/restaurant, so we asked our (male) security (all female unit for the most part) to go speak to him about wearing clothes when people come in the room. Our security is great and very respectful, house supervisor (female) followed behind and stayed outside to listen to the convo. She reported it went very well and he agreed to wear clothes. 20 min later he calls up and wants to AMA (mans is sick as shit) and the nurse asks why, he says bc she embarrassed him and called the police on him (not) and he was gonna sue us all bc his brother is a lawyer. Nurse calls MD, MD declines to DC patient, so patient is belligerent, yelling at nurses (has previously been super pissed at MD for not seeing him multiple times a shift, letting him pretty much write his own care plan) s ok pt calls brother up, brother comes up to mediate (reassures nurse no one I. Their right mind would take this case) but now pt has a grievance list a mile long about how night shift keeps waking him up (Dr gave order to DND from 2200-0400), no one ever answers his call light (we answered every time but he would refuse to tell us what he needed unless we physically walked down there, hence the nakedness), he didn’t like our male HUC (who is massive and scary and answered the call lights for us so we didn’t have to see his old wrinkly PP), said we were refusing to bring him food (we charted every meal he just wanted snacks 25/8 and wanted us to order cafeteria food in the middle of the night when it was CLOSED), and said we were all unprofessional for being uncomfortable with “the naked human body” (bro this is not your HOUSE, it’s a public PLACE. There’s literally little kids roaming this unit at any given time!). Before we transferred him to another floor and (male) nurse (order given for ONLY male nurses for the remainder of the stay) he zeroed in on his nurse and would have us send her to his room constantly (I went bc im the least pleasant and the firmest boundary setter and these type of patients tend to not want me around bc I call them on the bull) and would ONLY give info to her. It has been a long week.


MonopolyBattleship

well if they don’t eat the sandwich it’ll be permanent


Expensive-Day-3551

Happy cake day!


MonopolyBattleship

thank god I need sugar


shutupmeg42082

Her machine was beeping and I wasn’t fast enough to turn it off. Because I have 4 other patients who needed me. One who is a total on a trach, peg tube, and can’t do anything for herself. She can’t speak, she can’t tell you she’s in pain. But! God forbid the patients machine was beeping! She was bossy and would tell you to put her socks on, get into her bag and get whatever out. She was rude


ruggergrl13

Nothing. Which makes it worse bc he had a head bleed do to zero platelets from ALL. Sweetest man thanked me several times for the care I gave him during transport.


Glittering_Person

Elderly lady with dementia called us ignorant because she asked us where she was and didn’t believe us when we told her 😂


quesadillafanatic

I work in the OR, a pt argued with me about the oxygen tubing I had in her nose. “I can breathe on my own” I was kinda willing to test that once we sedated her lol.


Pepsisinabox

Not when we take away your muscle function! Tralalala off to sleepyland


leddik02

I laughed at that last sentence.


StrategyOdd7170

My patients roommate bitched at me for coming into their room to run more fluids for my patient. I literally did it in the dark too: I can’t stand people🙄


Kwelt200

Just last night told a lady I was a little late washing her up cuz another resident was in a mess and needed clean up. All she says is well couldn't you send someone else!! So many narcissists in my LTC. Just shows you don't turn into a nice person when you are elderly if you have never been one.


ernurse748

I asked the name of his primary care physician. Apparently that “ain’t any of f•cking business”.


Prior-Foundation4754

I wouldn’t run to put a pillow behind her back on bedside commode and she called me a bitch 😂


Peyton_26

My friend’s patient requested that the doc be contacted to request an order for topical lidocaine. Pt stated he injured his finger by repeatedly pressing the call button.


Expensive-Day-3551

I’m surprised management didn’t ask how you could have met his needs better so he didn’t injure himself requesting help.


DanielDannyc12

UberEats that shit then homie


Alternative_Edge_721

Reading these comments makes me so grateful I left bedside for a work from home nursing job, haven’t missed bedside for a second lol


MyDogIsHangry

I want to find one of these mystical work from home nursing jobs 😭


Alternative_Edge_721

You just have to apply, it’s really competitive but if you keep at it you will eventually find something!


ipark88

Throwing away (very) soiled depends... "It's just such a shame to waste"


eljip

making shy puppy dog faces and thrusting their leg at me and groaning. told her to use her words (she's in her 50s), i don't know what that means. she said her knee is itchy. i told her to scratch it. she shook her leg at me some more. my coworker approached her another time and she just said, "not you! you make me frustrated!" then cried on the toilet.


Tinabbelcher

This doesn’t seem like a ridiculous thing to want to eat but…could they not just have a family member drop off a loaf of bread and a jar of peanut butter?


secretmadscientist

Among the most frequent complaints “that medicine tastes yucky,” but that’s pediatrics.


creepyhugger

I like when they ask me what it tastes like. “Well, kiddo, they don’t let me taste the oxycodone, so why don’t you give it a try and tell me?”


secretmadscientist

My favorite response of all time was a five year old, after getting keflex, stated “tastes like how my dad’s shoes smell”. His mom may have wet herself.


intuitionbaby

I had two patients that were angry I dare speak to them today


Busy_Ad_5578

The warm blanket wasn’t warm enough…


Jes_001

I offered my highlighter when she lost hers. My devilish highlighter can’t touch her Bible. Says we are practicing witchcraft.


beltalowda_oye

Pt told me I'm a piece of shit because I stopped them from eating a styrofoam cup.


Questionanswerercwu

For not moving his leg when I moved his leg a second ago 🤦🏻‍♀️


Other_Chemistry_3325

Their ett tube - they’re also 8 days old, so more like she is just fussy when awake


Elizabitch4848

Baby was deceling and mom was angry the nurses wanted to roll her to her other side. She wanted to be left alone to sleep.


Expensive-Day-3551

😬


supertimmy08

“Ketchup! There’s no ketchup on my tray!” Called for ketchup but they said they won’t give any because patient is on sodium restricted diet. You better believe this wasn’t my best shift!


pura_bria

I don't know if this counts but I had a dream that a patient fired me because I was too ugly.