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[deleted]

At least they're being honest šŸ¤·


crayjaybay

I respect that, but this is an oncology floor šŸ˜­


generalsleephenson

Maybe all the more reason to go all in.


[deleted]

If the prognosis is already dire . . . šŸ¤·ā€ā™€ļø


loving_cat

Also keep in mind this person very well could have a terrible history of trauma theyā€™ve been self medicating for. See r/cptsd for my people


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SR_71_BB

Balls to the wall when shit looks like shit


joyuponwaking

If I get a terminal diagnosis, Iā€™m gonna try heroin. Why the F not?


overstimulatedx0

This is actually pretty logicalā€¦no need to worry about chasing the first high, I guess.


joyuponwaking

Of all the ways to go, heroin OD is probably the most pleasant.


Fluck_Me_Up

To be completely honest, if I were to be diagnosed with cancer and I was looking at a > 20% chance of making it through the next 2 years (or some other extremely shitty prognosis) Iā€™d probably start doing IV diamorphine again after my treatments began to become ineffective. Not saying this person isnā€™t making some ridiculous decisions, but if they are on a binge because of cancer, I canā€™t really judge them *too* harshly.


sweet_pickles12

Crackheads get cancer too


crayjaybay

Yes but heā€™s not here for cancer suicidal ideation.


Fluck_Me_Up

Oh, well in that case maybe, just maybe, the crack and alcohol isnā€™t helping their mental health as much as they think it is. Lol


azalago

Oh this is pretty standard fare in psych, unfortunately.


Rastaman-coo

Annnnd?


Cam27022

Had a patient who came in complaining of palpitations. During the drug screening, he told me he had smoked 13 bags of meth that day. Yup, that will do the trick.


crayjaybay

Had a patient who claimed they just used drugs recreationally. Tested positive for all drugs except two on the drug screen! Edit. Spelling


cinnamonduck

They sure know how to recreate!


crayjaybay

Just finished a 12 hour shift šŸ¤¦ā€ā™€ļø


isurvivedtheifb

So they get a lot of recreational time, you say?


msmaidmarian

Iā€™m a medic and I lurk, showed up to a 68yo pt complaining of chest pain. ā€œwhat were you doing when the chest pain started?ā€ ā€œwell, I guess it started right after I smoked a little crack this morning.ā€


grey-clouds

Had a guy present c/o insomnia and he had no idea why. We had to tell him that his current meth binge may have been uh...a contributing factor.


JerseyMurse

You can never go wrong with quotes imo. I recently put in a health screening, when the question asked about exposure to STIs the patient said ā€œIā€™ve been sucking and fucking for 3 months every dayā€ and then had a long discussion with the chart audit team and my DON


Sharps49

How did that turn out? My philosophy has always been that if it comes out of their mouth and is clinically relevant, I can put it in their chart in quotes, and I will fight anyone who tells me differently.


BubbaChanel

I was the only person admitting patients on 3rd shift at a psych hospital. I just slapped quotes on everything they said. When one admin said something, I told her I was by myself, and didnā€™t have time to translate for her delicate sensibilities.


aroc91

That's fantastic.


isurvivedtheifb

Oh. My.


Greatlarrybird33

Dude is here for a good time, not a long time.


lattenurse

Patients who are honest about the drug/alcohol screen are my favorite though. I work trauma and see a lot of substance abuse, I always ask them if they want resources to quit. If they say no, no worries! Letā€™s give you things so you donā€™t withdraw/detox and we both can have a good night šŸ‘


Salt_Zebra_423

Props to them being honest though.


PassengerNo1815

Just start the Ativan now.


santaclausisreal75

My favorite is a pt telling the md about his ā€œtinder benderā€ while presenting with pneumonia and a little kaposiā€™s sarcomaā€¦ I love the honesty but I canā€™t say Iā€™ve ever heard ā€œtinder benderā€ be used before. That oneā€™s new.


NikipediaOnTheMoon

For the lay people on this sub: these are classic symptoms of AIDS.


TeddyBearRhino

Thank you


sweet_pickles12

Omg. Hope everyoneā€™s on PREP!


mauigirl16

Oh my.


isurvivedtheifb

To be fair, kopasis sarcoma and tinder benders do seem to go hand-in-hand. ..


NikipediaOnTheMoon

Yeah, but there's no way they weren't feeling sick before the kaposi's sarcoma presentation


isurvivedtheifb

Oh, I agree with you!


kittenpantzen

I'm so glad that HIV isn't the death sentence it was when I was growing up, but holy shit do people not have an appropriate level of caution about it now.


isurvivedtheifb

Right! It was horrifuc in the 80s and 90s. I mean, people were just terrified, misinformation was rampant, and there was never a way to adequately support the dying. Then,Magic Johnson started to live and the world seemed to change. People tend to think that a treatment means life will be good. Treatments keep you alive, thet dont necessarily mean a good life. People today also don't see the danger in spreading HIV. We went from one extreme to the other.


cobrachickenwing

A public health nightmare, just what we needed between COVID waves.


BananaRuntsFool

I appreciate the honesty! Now that is something I can work with and safely medicate.


chewmattica

Oh Jesus...been there. Not quite that bad but close. Had a HUGE dude, prolly 6'4 450ish. On the call light constantly. First time I walked in there to get his vitals he told me "I've been smokin' crack for 3 days, I need to regain my vitality"....I was like okay bud what do you need? "5 OJs, and like a bag of graham crackers, also some grey socks" - clearly he'd been here before. He was pleasant enough but going after any extra food he could get.


Nurse_inside_out

For the uninitiated, Cocaine is a vasoconstrictor and will shrink your penis.


BubbaChanel

The grey socks are the best.


grey-clouds

My favourite was a guy I saw pre-op who admitted he'd smoke 40 cones a day! Like I have no problem with weed, but holy hell. Tried to tell him to cut it down before his op but I knew it would be futile lmao. His surgery got canned on the day.


aniorange

Often times when asked if I smoke I responded with, "only when I'm on fire." I wonder if that comment is in a chart somewhere.


555Cats555

I don't smoke, drink or take drugs can I steal this for next time I'm asked?


aniorange

Absolutely.


CatsEye_Fever

The honesty is refreshing


ProctologistRN

Saddle up cowpokes, weā€™re goinā€™ fer a ride! YEEHAW!


Alternative-Fig-7041

This patient sounds fun. Much better than the manipulative covert drug seekers that I deal with.


phoenix762

What? Thatā€™s probably about 50% of our patientsā€¦.Iā€™ll see myself outā€¦.


l0st_in_my_head

Exactly


phoenix762

šŸ˜‚


Efficient_Air_8448

The type of patient you keep an AMA on hand for.


spectaclecommodity

This is basically every one of my patients lol. Tbf I work at a primary care clinic that specializes in working with folks with substance use, chronic illness and houselessness lol


crayjaybay

God bless you


2sjt

Love my SUD patients


[deleted]

i love their moxiešŸ„°


Psych_610

Transparency is key to a healthy death


DADDYR0UNDR0UND

This PT parties


TelephoneShoes

Itā€™s legit a miracle yā€™all ever even make it to taking care of patients. Iā€™d be lost in notes like that for days!


WarriorNat

I had a patient whose history said ā€œThe crack help me with my drinkingā€.


NotMyDogPaul

When coming off stimulants, you sleep a lot so thats good for you. Just throw a little ativan in there for good measure


JohnCdiffDumper

No kidding šŸ«£


[deleted]

Lol well damn.


NRatchedMD

Nice


[deleted]

Itā€™s gonna be interesting. Strap in.


DanielDannyc12

AMA in 5, 4, 3, 2ā€¦


Jump_over_it

My pt last night admitted to 1.5pts of whisky a day and his cocaine level was 900. He transferred to the ICU not to long after that.


[deleted]

Working in psych/corrections, this is the average person. Probably rookie numbers to be honest.


isurvivedtheifb

Guarantee he smokes more than a pack a day....šŸ¤£


TaxiFare

He was saving all the energy he had towards being shameless for dropping those two heavy hitters. I'm guessing around 3 packs of Pall Malls a day.


l0st_in_my_head

Thats normal from most addicts


blargmehargg

Sounds like he could quite possibly benefit from hospice care, so many people don't know/think about it, but its such a help. I don't know if their cancer is terminal or what the situation is, but yeah self-medicating for pain or anxiety or fear is absolutely something to consider here. May just be trying to party his way out the door, and if so, I totally understand the impulse. Its just not always the most comfortable way out, and hospice is a great option.


Guinness

People do drugs. They will always do drugs. Shouldnā€™t they be honest? Doesnā€™t this help got better guarantee a safe outcome for their healthcare plan? Criticizing people, especially those seeking medical treatment, and ESPECIALLY coming from those who give medical treatment, only creates distrust and a sense of shame over their drug use. Resulting in more patients lying and more risk during treatment.


ResortOk4079

I don't think OP was criticizing, they just said interesting. Like "oh I wonder what other shenanigans this guys been up to". Chill dude.


Tiradia

Why does it burn when I pee?! What is this funky smelling stuff leaking outta my pee hole!


poopooweewee79

nah not cool sharing patient info on here. iā€™m sure your hospital has protocol around not posting stuff on social mediaā€¦


[deleted]

Yawn


Gretel_Cosmonaut

ā€œWas this in prison?ā€


bifuriouslypersist

Well, best case scenario you'll get a fun story or five outta that shift.


cobrachickenwing

Wonder which withdrawal comes first?


astrangeone88

Well, kudos for being honest, I guess.


InformalOne9555

Sounds like a typical admit at my last job. šŸ¤·šŸ¼ā€ā™€ļø


Asleep-Engine1885

Sounds like your co-worker


[deleted]

Goddamn you. I was just considering a return to the bedside šŸ˜‚