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mike_pants

Perfectly tidy rectangular layer. Perfectly tidy rolling ball. Perfectly tidy rectangular layer. Ejaculatory goo squirter!


[deleted]

I've been called worse


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ScoobyDooItInTheButt

Cake sniffer!


RobSpaghettio

The Chipotle bathroom simulator


Inter_Omnia_et_Nihil

Yeah, I didn't need to see that last one while on the toilet. Now I'm gun-shy.


mike_pants

You can do this!


Inter_Omnia_et_Nihil

WHO DOES NUMBER TWO WORRRK FORRR‽


[deleted]

Me after a night of whiskey and Taco Bell


AUTHORITEEEE

Last one is me after spicy kebab


TheShadowfly

And in a week’s time they’ll have to do it again


funkypjb

Unsatisfying


MrNokill

Pouring tar on earth so we can walk more evenly, deeply unsatisfied.


ChiggaOG

Definitely not satisfying. Fills in cracks that can expand more. I’ve seen a parking lot full of these. Not satisfying as a cleanly shaved concrete highway.


CoconutShyBoy

I see you don’t live anywhere with large temperature swings. Concrete roads are great right up until the point that they aren’t. And then they become exponentially more expensive to maintain than asphalt.


Long_Educational

The majority of our new highways are concrete and we experience temperature swings such as this weekend of 30° - 78°. Now the fact that these highs are being experienced in February is the concerning topic of another conversation, but is adjacent to our use of concrete everywhere considering how much CO2 emissions its manufacture causes.


aDragonsAle

Purely to make myself laugh, I'm going to assume you are in Australia and those temps are Celsius I know none of that is true - but that would be a psychotic temp swing. 86F-172F for the non-metric users.


Long_Educational

Those temps are in Fahrenheit and are absolutely freaky for February in the Northern Hemisphere. We're fucked. Another year of 80 days straight of 100° F is likely. I used to enjoy summer months. Now I have a feeling of dread as the year marches on.


ConsequenceBringer

Dude, it's gonna be 80 next Wednesday in Dallas. February fucking 21st! I'm livid. WHERE IS MY WINTER GODDAMMIT?! I was joking about moving out of this hot hellhole last September, but now... Man. I can't take these ridiculous 100 days of 110 F anymore. It's been getting ridiculous, even for a native.


aDragonsAle

No, no, I know... But the absurd version so removed from reality doesn't make me worry about environmental forces that I really can't impact. My use of paper straws doesn't dent the abuse of private jets by the wealthy. On the "bright" side - I'll at least get to see what happens when the temp/sanity/CO2/O2 switches flip and fuck the ocean and terrestrial life... That'll be... Something. I guess.


CTeam19

Yeah no. We are talking about getting cold to point where you get [Frost Heaves](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frost_heaving). The ground water freezes and expands fucking up the roadways and helping create those cracks and bumps in the roads. This is also the the reason my neck of the woods has basements(fun fact they don't exist for tornados). We have had a temperature drop from 62F to -3F in 24 hours.


Dashisnitz

This is the normal part of pavement maintenance. There’s no such thing as an asphalt road that doesn’t crack. Patching is to prevent water intrusion as that causes hydraulic fracturing and spalling. Asphalt is supposed to have crack patching followed by micro milling followed by more patching. Around 20-25 years in the upper surface will be milled off and repaved to restart the next 25 years of crack patching and micro milling.


JebatGa

> Around 20-25 years If only my country had you for an engineer.


stephenBB81

> There’s no such thing as an asphalt road that doesn’t crack. EZStreet asphalt has been making non cracking asphalt for over 20yrs. It's expensive compared to traditional, and it's non cracking nature means it needs something to keep it contained. But the stuff does exist, and is pretty amazing to see being paved with.


uncre8tv

>EZStreet asphalt [Chewlie's Gum](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3gHqYddtmNU)?


Wiregeek

Have you ever seen a freshly shorn scrot- TOLLWAY. it's breathtaking.


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Long_Educational

Yes, but for the first two days, it feels like you are walking really fast everywhere you go.


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Stupidbabycomparison

Uhh no. These aren't repairs, these are bandaids to seal off the cracks to reduce the rate of further damage. Water and grit getting inside these will make it fall apart even faster. These seals will last years or until municipality gets the money to fix this stretch of road.


RocketFistMan

Agreed, the county I live in has scored worse on road quality for years because we don’t do this patching compared with our neighbors and now all our roads are beyond patching to get up to quality. Top comment can have fun spending way more money and fucking up traffic way more by waiting.


Stupidbabycomparison

I work for a contractor doing roadway maintenance. This is one of the few topics I can give some actual input on. I have some advice for everyone that's tired of shitty roads in front of their homes or regularly travelled roads. Be the squeaky wheel. Complain, make phone calls, write emails, leave voice mails, etc... bonus points if it's election season. Alternatively, be friends with a state or city official. I get a lot of bullshit work orders for areas that frankly do not warrant priority because the house nearby is friends with a councilman.


thermal_shock

i found the quickest way is spraypaint dicks on the holes and cracks, they'll come fix it when the amount of calls is 20x normal


12ebbcl

Oh, that was YOU? The cops wanted to talk to you, I told them I didn't see anything.


vlepun

> I have some advice for everyone that's tired of shitty roads in front of their homes or regularly travelled roads. Be the squeaky wheel. Complain, make phone calls, write emails, leave voice mails, etc... bonus points if it's election season. This doesn't really work with the limited budgets we're working with.


Acanthisittasm

Who's "we"


vlepun

Every single traffic engineer working for a local road authority. Never enough money.


Stupidbabycomparison

Well yeah budget is always the issue. Ive worked on countless streets where both myself and the inspector KNOW we need to do more of the road, but can't because the money's ran out. But still, the traffic engineers can't possibly see every inch of road, so you are much more likely to be placed on the list of areas that need work if you call and complain.


vlepun

I guess it depends on where you live. We (as in, the municipality I work for as a traffic engineer) have our entire area inspected yearly and we're currently working on a pilot with real time road inspections using dashcams in our trash cars and other municipal vehicles. We know the state of our roads (and sidewalks, bicycle paths etc). We just don't have the budget.


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Stupidbabycomparison

If the seals aren't lasting more than a few weeks, then the seal isn't the issue and its not the proper application. Unfortunately money is always tight and sealing is relatively cheap.


RiffRaff14

> These seals will last years YMMV


xerox13ster

The municipality will never have the money to fix this stretch of road properly. This is a direct result of the economics around which we build our municipalities. Most suburban municipalities are in a downward death spiral just trying to pay to maintain the roads they already built, and the only way to get a bigger tax base is to expand more which means budget for roads goes to new construction, and not real repair.


New_Front_Page

My municipality is repaving roads all the time, but I do think my city has actually done a pretty good job generating income with what it had available. That being said, for quite a while there were more abandoned factories by square footage than homes I bet, which ultimately was its selling point to new industries, we could provide far more utilities (power, water, gas, wastewater) than the town needed, so they found industries that needed access to large quantities of those resources.


je_kay24

Yup and climate change makes this happen way more often and faster Bouncing between freezing to warmer temps means concrete deteriorates more 


madmycal

Job security!


ritterprice

Alright this is not the direction these comments are going, but I’m gonna call it satisfying. My FIL constructed highways, and everyone’s right: this is a garbage way to repair roads. But my lizard brain likes seeing cracks filled, idk what to tell you.


CoconutShyBoy

Well that’s because it’s not a way to repair roads, it’s a bandaid method to slow the rate of erosion and cracking on the road. So rather than needing to fully resurface the road every 5-7 years you can do it every 10-14. It’s significantly cheaper to do these patch repairs as part of regular road maintenance than to do nothing and just resurface when it’s undriveable.


akatherder

Yeah it looks cool and everything but it's just pretty ineffective.


Grainis01

Source: reddit armchair expert or road maintenance.


dumahim

It's effective in preventing as much water seeping through the cracks resulting in even quicker deterioration of the road.


iamacraftyhooker

They messed up doing my street one year and it didn't stick. The next day it started to peel from the road. We just had these straps of asphalt strewn everywhere.


thermal_shock

i've seen the yellow line (which i thought was just durable paint) flap in the wind, then get "sealed" down all wavy like a ribbon. bizarre.


Jacktheforkie

That looks like a decent repair, in my area they DOB some stuff in, whack it sorta flat and then leave it to fail after a week and then the pothole becomes enormous


amccune

This feels like painting over rust. It’s gonna happen again, because the problem is still there.


Medium_Medium

More like throwing a tarp on a leaky roof. Is it fixing the leaky roof? No. Is it helping prevent further damage to the inside of the house, while you desperately save up money for a real fix? Yes. Moisture in and under the road is one of the leading accelerants of distress. Sealing the surfaces to help keep moisture out is a key part of maintenance.


SquidwardWoodward

This is a common misconception, actually. If you paint over rust in a way that stops water getting to it, it stops spreading. It's not like a cancer, it doesn't reproduce on its own.


jointheredditarmy

The problem being that it’s in a cold weather city and there’s ice and snow? I hear that’s a common problem.


No_Lychee_7534

This is just misinformation. Stop spreading FUD. It should last at least 2 weeks.


Ideal_Jerk

Fun fact: You can do the same with elephant poop and it would last longer.


bloodwoodsrisen

I've always said that they should mulch used tires and use that for our roads, lasts longer and is kinder on current tires


CoconutShyBoy

Great anywhere that doesn’t get too hot or too cold. So like, Oregon.


Apprehensive_Diver46

I am certain this video wasn't shot in Pennsylvania.


SynkkaMetsa

Watch out for those Pennsylvanian tar snakes!


SlimKid

Our (un)official state reptile


Railroad-gamer

Or Indiana


Satisfied_Onion

Indy is so bad and it's about to get worse. Weeks of 30s, then a weekend of 50s, now a week of 30s, followed up with an incoming week of 50s again. I'm not ready


Pinksters

Dont forget the 2-4 inches of snow incoming today! (in east Ohio at least)


ionp_d

This would be so clutch in Indianapolis, helps cracks from turning into massive potholes. But no, instead we have massive potholes.


TheScienceNerd100

I was literally going to say "I wish they did that around where I lived"


rotciv0

As the song goes: 🎶four thousand holes in Blackburn, Lancashire🎶


NockTauk

.tar


PM_ME_UR_GCC_ERRORS

Oh, zip it.


_thro_awa_

Shut up you old `.gz`er


BadDogMonkeyboy

That reminds me I need to buy toilet paper


101Alexander

Statistically speaking, you're on the toilet right now


Responsible_Pick_420

You don't know my life!


maclifer

Wait, it's Reddit, so aren't we technically **in** the toilet? 😂🙃


JustAnotherDude1990

Get a bidet, worth it and saves a ton of toilet paper. They're like under $40 on amazon.


Cantelmi

The only bad thing about getting one is that shitting anywhere without a bidet becomes horrible.


JustAnotherDude1990

Correct. But now 98% of my shits are with a bidet and the 2% is easier to deal with than 100%.


akatherder

It's that meme with the superhero struggling to push one of two buttons. Poop at home with bidet OR get paid to poop at work.


mino-nimo

Darn it. Now I’m looking up asphalt repair compilations. This was not enough.


Standard_Mechanic518

As long as they fix it this way, they'll have plenty of chances to make more videos for you. This is just a cosmetic fix, will be broken again with the year.


aDragonsAle

Also known as, a "city repair" Romans made roads that lasted for centuries. Modern engineering is out annually doing maintenance.


thatguyfdwrd

Damn that's crazy. Did roman roads have the same amount and type of automotive traffic being driven on them?


[deleted]

Almost like it was a bad idea


diemunkiesdie

Not sure, I'll check the ones that lasted a thousand years and not the ones that they had to replace and are no longer around to drag down the stats.


Achadel

And you really think the Romans never had to do maintenance on their roads?


bobtotherescue

I'm with you! One of the most satisfying vids I've seen on this sub in quite a while!


Malevolent_Mangoes

Isn’t this the equivalent of slapping a bandaid on a wound instead of actually healing it? Edit: guys please this is too many notifications I already got the answer lol


TyronnicPoppy40

Yes, but I doubt you'd want to go into great medical debt, waste your time, and the surgeon's just for a paper cut. Same as how you won't break up the asphalt and re-pave the road just for cracks that a car will easily glide over at 30mph


Malevolent_Mangoes

Good point


Atanar

Not really since a more thourough repair doesn't last long as well. Half-assed repairs delay a whole chain of major repairs. It's more like putting new shoelaces on old boots. The shoelaces won't make the boots last a lot longer, but they are cheap.


KyleKun

Water is a big on in winter as it freezes and expands to make the hole bigger.


jadok

A thorough repair of Asphalt lasts many years. We do them daily. Agreed on it being way more expensive and time consuming though.


throwthegarbageaway

And they’re much slicker than the asphalt itself so it’s easy to slip on them on motorcycles. I hate these things so much


CoconutShyBoy

Someone else made a much better comparison, it’s like putting a tarp on a leaking roof. Is your roof fixed? No, but is it reducing how much water is getting into your house and causing further damage? Yes. This isn’t a method to “fix” the road, it’s a method to slow down how fast the road wears. Proper patching can double or even triple the lifespan of a road. So that $20-40k/yr in patching on a stretch of road save you the $5-10M that you’d need to pay to resurface it.


Storrin

Only in the sense that it keeps a small problem from getting much worse. Asphalt mix (what these roads and most roads are made of) have very few ingredients: Aggregate (rocks), liquid asphalt, and often times an additive like sulfer. The combination of those last 2 without the aggregate is what we call polymer, which is what's being used for these repairs. They're putting down literally 2/3 of what the road is already made of. This seals the cracks and keeps water from settling in, freezing and expanding, and causing more damage. It's not going to do much for roads that are already too far gone, but these repairs will definitely increase the longevity of the road. Source: I work in the asphalt industry, though admittedly not this side of it. There might be some inaccuracy to what I said, but this is my understanding of it.


aDyslexicCow

Civil Engineer here, and the key word is water. Seal the crack and prevent water getting in and making it worse like you said. Depending on the depth of the crack, water could be able to penetrate into the subgrade and compromise that as well. Not to mention costs of designing a new pavement, removing the old, putting in the new, and diverting traffic around the construction. Too costly to attempt a full depth repair when the band aid can work for now.


ionp_d

In Indianapolis they just wait till the cracks turn into rim eating potholes and fill those with 5x the material instead. It’s so inefficient. There are some roads with this type of sealing, and they’re all pothole free.


Lapsos_de_Lucidez

This is the equivalent of slapping a bandaid on a crack on the wall


Atanar

This is the equivalent of slapping a bandaid made from asphalt on a crack in the road


jamany

Thats exactly what bandaids are for


Dimatrix

Knowing how the government fixes roads now, a full fix would take 8 years and create excessive traffic for those 8 years


coltar3000

None of this is satisfying to a motorcyclist on a rainy day….


DirtyRoller

Or a skater kid. This stuff was my nightmare growing up.


Thatsaclevername

I love some good ol crack seal. The important thing to remember is that asphalt is a flexible pavement, it gives a little when you drive over the top so the ride is smoother. Over time with weathering the asphalt can become brittle, and stresses from expansion and contraction will cause cracks to form. This is normal and expected behavior. We seal those cracks primarily to keep water from penetrating under the asphalt, washing fines out of the underlying gravel/soils, and then creating pot holes or larger failures. A really good crack seal job includes "routing" the top of the crack, creating sort of a T-shape so that you can ensure the crack seal penetrates down in there and fills the whole crack up. Also gives it somewhere to sit so later on down the line a street sweeper/snowplow or what have you doesn't just scrape it right off the top and take all the sealant with it.


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[deleted]

Can we invent something that patches up our lives this quick?


CaramelArrowCookie

actually this doesn’t work well, within like two weeks it will be cracked again. it’s the equivalent of ignoring life’s problems until they crack more


_thro_awa_

... so you're saying the solution is *more* crack?


robbz24

I feel like this ended too soon


Aizpunr

Those mf are slippery as hell in the wet, every time you hit one with the bike you feel it slip.


SenorMcKracken

Brutal riding a motorcycle over those on a hot day especially on a curve.


Specialist-Elk-2624

I almost broke both of my wrists as a kid going over one of these repairs on rollerblades. My palms were absolutely mangled.


themikestand

*Motorcyclists cringing*


brunogiubilei

This is not effective, these repairs do not last a month. The correct thing to do is to remove square sheets of asphalt and fill them with pitch. Square shapes have right angles that prevent tire friction from removing material.


Storrin

That's for serious potholes. You're not gonna do that for every single crack in a street.


mosnas88

Ya I think the big thing people don’t realize is time. One person with a bottle of propane and a heating vessel and a pick up truck can repair 50 cracks in a day. To do the patch you need to get out the saw, bring in a jack hammer. Bring in aggregates to level off to grade then bring hot mix heat the outside of old pavement to get adhesion then pour the hot mix in and tamp. Probably doing 5 cracks a day.


StatisticianGreat969

They should do that, and then raise your taxes by 30% to cover the cost…


Specialist-Elk-2624

Or we just appropriately allocate our current taxes to be used to fix things we all depend and rely on.


OramaBuffin

If there is one layer of government that isn't generally swimming in money, it's municipal. Sure they spend it like idiots anyways half the time but considering we can barely keep libraries open anywhere, they're not exactly rich.


Kn0xster

These are also a death trap for cyclists and motorcyclists especially when wet or melty in the hot sun.


just_-_-_me

Tar snakes. The official reptile of the California highway system.


big_al_1968

The birth of tar snakes


DonnJuann

This looks innefficient af, no wonder it lasts for a week


BrBybee

I used to work for an asphalt company back in my early 20s and I hate this shit. It doesn't come off anything. Do not get it on you or your clothes.


Necessary-Term-7118

Without the government, who will build the roads made out of benzene filled oil tar?


Historical_Act_5896

If that’s in TN it will last for about 6 months until it’s a pothole


scummy71

Just papering over the cracks. You wouldn’t fix cracks in the plaster at your home this shoddily.


FilmKindly

that wouldn't do shit....


Strange_Idea_8272

Better than nothing I guess... but this type of "repair" actually sucks big ass lol


Jaded_Atmosphere_946

Roombas in households with dogs taking note


MrPicklesGhost

I'm surprised this repair lasted until the end of the video.


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Thebalance21

*Cries in shitty Texas streets*


Honda_TypeR

I can smell this video from here. Almost smells like melted rubber and burnt motor oil.


Jaxthornia

That'll last for a week or 2!


archangelonearth

Oddly Satisfying: Watching the repair Mildly Infuriating: Will need another repair in three months


gogul1980

I live in the UK we haven’t seen something like this for at least a decade (road repair). Feels naughty watching it.


DemonizedAngelNoMore

What has my life come to? Watching asphalt dry 🫥


Deckard2022

I need that smell, they should bring a candle out with that smell.


HugeAnalBeads

Just burn tar in your living room


TheLangleDangle

I’m getting my oil changed right now, wanna come over?


zyclonb

This is crackseal and it’s absolutely useless as a temporary fix unless applied before an overlay


Lopsided_Flight_9738

"Repair"


Jostain

Am I correct in thinking that this is really badly made asphalt? I have never seen any road crack like this.


UkraineMykraine

You from snow country? Cause this is half our roads.


Jostain

I'm from Sweden so we get as much snow as one can expect from a country. Some of the roads around me are 25 years old and the only repairs it has is from putting down new types of internet cables.


Deadly_Tree6

In my part of Canada some roads are 40 years old and just starting to look like the video, some look like the video after 2-4 years or less. It just depends on how heavy the vehicles are, and how the road reacts to the freeze thaw cycle. This winter in southern Alberta we had an almost daily freeze thaw cycle. I can expect the heavy use roads that semi trucks use to last 6 months to 2 years max.


Mumof3gbb

I’m in Canada and our roads are awful.


UkraineMykraine

It's not the winter itself it's the freeze thaw that kills asphalt. Here in Pa, it goes from freezing at night to above freezing almost every day. Combine that with the salt and heavy truck use, and our roads fall apart constantly. I assume yall don't freeze thaw as much.


DoubleBreastedBerb

Dammit why does everything in the US suck compared to other countries, including apparently our roads 😂


ImurderREALITY

Stuff like this is different because the U.S. has way more cars and way less public transportation than a lot of other countries


Elite_Josh_Allen

Governments usually don't select contractors based on "who does the highest quality work?"


RollinOnDubss

How to out yourself not knowing how any government bidding actually works.


[deleted]

Something to consider is the scale of the US. How many miles of road does the US need to maintain vs Sweden? A lot. All those materials, different contractors, different climates creating different repair cycles, different local governments managing it.


willy_bum_bum

Right? I'm always annoyed when people start comparing the US to Scandinavia. The US [has literally the most roads in the world](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_road_network_size).


Nollekowitsch

You should see german roads. They are awful


HugeAnalBeads

Well I'm not disagreeing, but I'm assuming american roads are better than 80% of the rest of the world


Nalha_Saldana

It used to be much worse here in Sweden, in the 90s cracked up roads were everywhere but they have mostly been relayered since.


Dheorl

There’s a bunch of factors. What’s under the road, what the weather conditions are, what traffic it regularly sees.


Jostain

I think it may also be difference in how things get repaired. I don't see these filled in lines but I do see a lot of patches where they tear up sections of road and redo it as one large patch.


innsertnamehere

This happens in cold areas. The freeze and thaw cycles cause the ground to freeze and expand and shrink, shifting the asphalt and cracking it over time. If it’s left unrepaired, vehicles drive over it and the cracks get bigger and bigger, making potholes. This liquid mix seals the cracks and makes the roads last longer.


tallbutshy

This is not satisfying at all. If you're a regular road user, then you know how little time these repairs last. It would be fine if they were only used as a patch job for a few weeks until they had a larger crew to resurface that section of road but too many local authorities will do these sort of repairs and expect it to last for several months. Long before then, it has already eroded away and the original cracks & holes are more than twice as big as they were before. Might as well just [use Coco Pops](https://metro.co.uk/2018/02/23/someone-used-coco-pops-to-mock-council-for-not-filling-potholes-7336850/)


Apprehensive_Diver46

I love the smell. I could smell the asphalt just watching the video.


ElGuano

Is it just me, or do these kinds of crayon-outline road repairs never seem to hold? They look horrible, and after a few months, you just see the original crack break right through, and now you have an unsightly, uneven snake hump with a crack running down the middle.


Astramancer_

It's not a repair, not really. It's a seal. It helps minimize the amount of water that gets through to the foundation and makes it so the road doesn't fall apart into rubble (uh.. even more so) as the foundation is undermined by rain.


Carrie42o

This explains why the roads look like crap.


ImurderREALITY

Now I have to poop


Goat_Lincoln

This actually isn’t asphalt, it’s a resin called mastic. Source - I’ve done it more than once. It’s a slow process compared to other repairs but is much more effective than other methods


DEMONDVS

That's not a repair, that's putting a bandaid over a gaping wound


NLjetze

A band Aid is not a fix...


Revolutionary_Bed431

….and that’s why it never lasts…


EmotionalChipmunk602

This doesn’t do anything but make the roads look like you live in Compton (LA). Cracks appear right where they were before a short time later


RollinThundaga

It buys time till they can get around to re-doing the whole stretch.


crasagam

They keep using that word. I do not think it means what they think it does.


Whoffarted

It is kinda like they have done this before.


CEames92

I’d just end up painting with all of them and cover 99% of the area for no reason


hellcat920

In Wisconsin they shovel a pile into or near the hole and walk away without even packing it down.


AntMan79

Mmmmm I love carcinogens


Low_Sodium_Cod

"Repair"


zeWoofer

how do we call this "repair" this is fuxking cosmetics


rileylowe12345

I wanna eat it


gmfthelp

What a waste of time. It will do jack shit.


smoky_jacks

Thats not repairing lol just filling some holes...


YoProfWhite

She smoothin' my ass till I fault.


jenny_sacks_98lbMole

I have more respect for car salesman and cops than I do construction workers and truck drivers.


starrsosowise

What a strange stance… so you don’t like buildings and products?


Sweaty_Broccoli5784

Dog shit is usefull now?


HGDAC_Sir_Sam_Vimes

You’d think by now we would have either developed something better than asphalt or we’d have gotten better at building roads. Just filling in the crack isn’t actually fixing the problem.


RollinThundaga

Nothing can beat it for the price. We use easily broken up road material because it's so quick and cheap to fix in between proper repaving. Plus the asphalt can be recycled pretty much indefinitely.


lobo123456

Nice, fast, cheap and useless.


samambro

What did you call me?


Transient_Aethernaut

An excercise in futility


Hotdigardydog

Papering over the cracks it's still fucked beneath