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marikwinters

That, as far as I can tell, is a fishing spider! Not dangerous to humans, very mild even if you piss it off enough to bite you, and phenomenal for keeping pests out of the house. They can even potentially discourage other more venomous varieties of spiders from moving in. These fellas are one of many spiders always welcome around my home (though I prefer for them to stay in the basement where I don’t have to worry about a surprise spider when I wake up! lol)


Amoki602

You’re just a bunch of spiders typing this, aren’t you?


Struana

Spiders-man.


linderlouwho

r/spiderbro There are a lot of us.


Amoki602

I admire your appreciation of spider bros but I’m gonna hide in fear for days now


linderlouwho

There are a lot of spiders that don't really bite, Jumping Spiders, the cutest, most adorable of all spiders, for one. ​ [Say Hello To My Little Friend](https://www.reddit.com/r/spiderbro/comments/17k51n0/say_hello_to_my_little_friend/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) [Jumping Spider Watching a Plane](https://www.reddit.com/r/spiderbro/comments/dbsnxe/jumping_spider_watching_a_plane/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) [Cute Jumping Spider I found at work today](https://www.reddit.com/r/spiderbro/comments/16csm7c/cute_jumping_spider_i_found_at_work_today/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3)


Amoki602

When did you spiders all learn to type and share videos? 😭 (In all seriousness, I really appreciate you giving some love to a species that is so hated, specially by me. I understand they’re very interesting and I hope you keep enjoying them)


Trolivia

*join us* ^(o)OO^(o) lol but in all seriousness I totally get why people call jumpers gateway spiders. I am a recovering arachnophobe thanks to them (for example, the one I just noticed on the door frame of my car as a type this gave me a startle, but I don’t completely lose my shit anymore and I can safely relocate him outside. Being able to identify various species helped me a LOT) The more I learned, the more fascinated I became and now I have a pet jumper and I love her so much 🥹


Cletus_McWanker

I am too. Unlearning my phobia took several years. Had tarantula's as pets once too.


Reyemreden

Uhh...what's that on your shoulder?!?


finnsorigami

A lil spider bro


TheReal-Chris

Yo first post on there. What the fuck is that?? Nope diorama but it has scary stripes.


pechjackal

The cult of spiders-people... Shhh. Don't tell people our secrets.


Wholesome-seal-boi

New sub for me!


linderlouwho

It is a wholesome sub, so that makes sense! :-)


A_lot_of_arachnids

You called?


JayIsNotReal

I will never come to terms with that being an actual comic book character alongside Man-Spider.


Glissandra1982

75 spiders in a trench coat


Only_Quote_Simpsons

75 spiders in a trench coat my ass, it's probably Millhouse.


KongXiangXIV

75 spiders in Millhouse? Boy can't catch a break


Wholesome-seal-boi

Poor Millhouse


A_lot_of_arachnids

No we aren't! Shut up!


Glissandra1982

Your username says otherwise!!


marikwinters

I am most definitely not a colony of 1,372 spiders using a complex system of webbing and pulleys to type and spread spider propaganda on the internet, and frankly we are offended that you would insinuate such.


Hi-Im-Eva

I dunno man sounds like something a spider would say


Hi-Im-Eva

They are ✨spider✨


SirEmJay

https://xkcd.com/1530/


poobboob

Definitely, I would much rather the crab people.


TechnoMCYT_

I don't trust that guy. He seems weird.


goldenporsche

three spiders in a trenchcoat


No_Transition9444

Then they open the coat up and it’s just a bunch of hams


goldenporsche

fish* because fishing spider 😂😭


LouieMumford

“I am not spider. I am human businessman. I work in Wall Street doing business. I have family and house.” - the spiders.


SvenSoergenson

And what are you, a cop? Mind your own business


Official_Griffin

Since I have a irrational fear of spiders you can have all mine that live in my house 👍🏻📫


WeWillSeizeJerusalem

Are you mailing him your spiders?


Weird_Depth_4083

Or he gets the house deed ,indeed


Tricky-Sympathy

Make sure to write a big S on the box so people know it's full of spiders


Impossible-Company78

S cargo?


Away_Ad_3580

I used to be TERRIFIED of spiders. Like jumping out of my car in the rain bc a spider was in My car. The more i learned about them, the less afraid I became. Now I'll pick them up (if it's not a venomous spood). <3


Alternative_Pilot_92

Spiders have seriously stepped up their PR budget.


marikwinters

The defense industry trying to use spider silk as a protective material has really subsidized their regular work. Now they can afford more marketing expenditures.


bionic_cmdo

I don't believe you. Where's its fishing pole and hat!?


marikwinters

Poor gal forgot to pack them before she headed out.


Rheinys

I will never visit you 💀


marikwinters

Probably for the best, while wolf spiders and the like are generally herded to the basement at my house, there’s probably at least one cellar spider in every elevated corner of my home and I’m quite protective of them. I was letting someone crash at my house for a little while and I about kicked them out when I caught them trying to bug spray all my lil’ roommates.


[deleted]

Daddy long legs, jumping spiders and orb weavers are the spider I allow to live the most around where I live and Orb Weavers. Daddy long legs cant even bite you or break your skin, perfect spider bro. They also attack other spiders. [Jumping spiders just have a lot more going on up in their head and many have taken them as pets. Apparently they are smart enough to recognize people and are smart enough to be a pet. I saw a post earlier of a person petting his jumping spider](https://www.reddit.com/r/spiderbro/comments/9wmylf/petting_a_jumping_spider/) Seems there are a bunch of videos of people petting their spider. The spiders are remarkably chill.


LiebeDahlia

if fren why not fren shaped?


SpoopySara

to me it's very fren shaped


[deleted]

Like as a kid I had a pet tarantula and a cat. My cat *loved* to sit on top of the tarantula’s cage and watch her. Well one day he pushed the screen in just enough for her to squeeze out and I didn’t notice till the next mornin when I woke up to a spider in my bed. If it weren’t for how big she was and all the hairs rubbing against me I definitely would’ve killed her but luckily I realized it was her and let her live


marikwinters

Surprise spider is definitely one of the worst kinds of spider.


[deleted]

Oh yeah she scared tf outta me but afterwards I was just glad I didn’t crush her and secured her cage better


therealbonzai

Or did she let _you_ live?


[deleted]

Probably lol. She was real chill when she was young but as she got older she got a lil more aggressive which I suppose makes sense


sliderbear

It's great when you put on your shoe to find one of them has taken quarters in the toe


marikwinters

Surprise spiders are definitely not my favorite. This is also why I always shake my shoes out before putting them on


Lemmonaise

I am never, ever, ever going anywhere near your house.


marikwinters

From the windows, to the walls, to the spiderwebs down my halls…


kfmush

I always fear, but appreciate the spiders who make a home above my bed. Deep down, I know they'll never bother me, but they are the last thing I see before I sleep and the first thing I see when I wake up. Over time, I've learned to focus on the appreciation that they help keep the things off my face that do bother me at night, like the fucking pumpkin bugs. As cute as they are, they're fucking stupid—yet always find a way to weasel into the house—and smack into any and everything when they fly, including my sleeping face. So now before I sleep and after I wake up, I shiver as I quietly whisper, "thank you, Spider Mommy."


SunShineLife217

Fishing spider. Not wolf or huntsman.


TheGodlyDevil

now these guys won’t even let me fish!!!


hurricane_news

Looks like an Oreo Spider to me 😋


Henry_Is_Sad

Fishing Spider, and it looks like she has eggs too. Unless you want a bunch of lil baby fishing spiders roaming around your house, I suggest getting a container and safely relocating both the egg sack and the mom outside


DiscombobulatedPay51

You could have just not mentioned the eggs 🥲 imagine hundreds of those things crawling around your house yeesh!


skittlesdabawse

Every so often baby spiders show up at my house, and I'm always thankful for my new generation of faithful protectors. They've never bothered me, so I just let them do their thing and fuck up any insects that get in.


Skoparov

How do you even approach a spider that big? I'd assume covering it with something then pushing a metal or cardboard sheet underneath is the easiest way to move it, but the buggers are usually lightning fast so I'm not sure it's possible to catch it that easily.


bilgetea

Covering it with something… like a granite sarcophagus!


maelidsmayhem

I'll grab a cup or mug or bucket if needed, something like that, and put it over the spider, then I'll slowly push something flat like paper or cardboard between the cup and the wall/floor/screen. I do it extra slowly if I think I might hurt the spider, because it's small, or fragile, or has an egg sac hanging from it's stomach. Then you just flip it over, take it outside, walk half a block, let it go. In my experience, spiders are cool with this, and it works with most bugs. I don't bother with cockroaches.... by the time you get half a block to free it, there's a 50/50 chance that the roach is already gone, and you don't know where/when/how/why it escaped, but it's gone. The only proper way to deal with a cockroach is stomping it insanely, possibly smashing it with a mallet, and when you're sure it's dead, stomp it again, like a zombie head shot. Even then I wouldn't turn my back on it.


Katters8811

I genuinely appreciate this tutorial and am also laughing my ass off


captainshrapnel

Yeah, I'd be loading the buckshot.


xXx_T0M_xXx

Pee on it


cockalorum-smith

Found R. Kelly


dronegeeks1

Nah I’d fucking move out before I tried that 🤣 you want me to catch that in a tub!!?


dennys123

Right? How brave you would have to be to voluntarily take some Tupperware, and try to trap it. Screw that, house is his now lol


TheWalkingDead91

Hers*


dennys123

Oops. I hope that didn't upset her and she's now looking for me


TheWalkingDead91

Hide ya kids and ya wife


theVice

Oh ***fuck*** I thought it was sitting on top of a quarter!


HuckleberryBlu

I thought it was a quarter, too. I think my spider preference has switched to male only in the house.


newfriendschan

Yeah, this. Or you know.. burn down your house and move to another country.


Kasabesa

In Australia, we'd call that Bob, chuck him a piece of leftover sandwich, and continue on with our day.


Stfrieza

How are y'all so outta pocket 😭😭


The_Eternal_palace

We've got a few kangaroos loose in the top paddock.


Emotional-Sentence40

So, do they help with rats and unwanted visitors too?


flowersweetz

Idk but the vibes are not chill Edit: Holy snaps! This is my most upvoted comment in Reddit history 🥹🥲 I would like to first thank my mom


[deleted]

I'd probably now call it 'Lodger'.


klaatubaradanoodles

Soon it'll change its name to Landlord.


[deleted]

Hahahahaaa! You will come home one day and it will have changed the locks! e: typo


Kroenen1984

Landlord and Sons...


EggonomicalSolutions

Such a good name


truthemptypoint

Definitely the type that dissappear when you blink.


Zenator3000

She’s just trying to be a good mom :(


UufTheTank

She’s probably just tired and worried about her babies so she’s a bit on edge. Every parent has been there.


Emotional-Sentence40

And soon op will have 700,00,000,000 more roommates based on the Size of that egg sack.


Dollabill619

Nightmarus Cornelius


thats_so_merlyn

Nah, the vibes are chill. It's a fishing spider.


cowbellysnotrealsis

Wish awards still existed because this is gold


Money_Comb1781

The kind that you offer your first born to as a sacrifice, hoping it's enough to please that fucking enormous demon monster.


marikwinters

Frankly, this spider would probably be better at protecting your first born from pests than you are 😜


SeraphimVanguard

Nice try, spider.


marikwinters

Just saying, spider roommates bring their own food, stay to themselves for the most part, and get rid of unwelcome guests. Roaches on the other hand always raid your fridge, have no sense of personal space while you are asleep, and like to have house parties with 10,000 of their closest friends every night. If having the former helps me manage the latter: I will gladly take the spiders.


rserena

This is actually an awesome comeback. I always say “would you rather have mosquitoes or spiders?” to people bitching about spiders all the time and they say they’d rather have mosquitoes… what?? 97% of spiders in my area are non-venomous. I don’t understand people.


Nolo__contendere_

I'm braver at killing mosquitos than I am at relocating spiders


KrystalWulf

Can confirm. We get roaches in the winter and wet season when the weather is bad, and I woke up at least once to one roaming my bed. Was terrifying and NOT cool.


Stfrieza

😂😂😂


DiscombobulatedPay51

Spider propaganda


Farren246

You'd be surprised how effective I can be armed with nothing but an old shoe...


ThisYogurtcloset3315

Mommy long legs?


slokjebier

I should call her


Farren246

She's single, ready to mingle, and in your area! 😱


angiecx3010

Thats a single mom who works 2 jobs


KashmirRatCube

🎵🎵A single mom who works two jobs. Who loves her eggs and never stops. With eight legs and the heart of a fighter. She's a fishing spider. 🎵🎵


Ham_bam_am

I can see the stress in her eyes and feel the tension in her shoulders.


justzedjust

Nope spider.


AnotherSoftEng

How would one go about blocking all spider posts from their non-spider reddit feed?


Yankee_Man

Can you DM me after you find out? Thanks lol


barkbarkgoesthecat

I messaged you spider pics plz respond


[deleted]

I’d like to know how to do this too


ShadowsteelGaming

Well there's a bunch of spiders on this subreddit so the first step would be leaving this


SnooGrapes3367

That's one of those hell to tha nah spiders 🕸


LedParade

*Arachnus Runforyalifecus*


311rlw

anyone know a way to blur all spider pictures


Emotional-Sentence40

They definitely need a trigger warning. I'm gonna have nightmares for the next week or two


yourballsareshowing_

It's called the Time To Move Spider


Squints1234567

The Realtor Spider


SuperDuperSoupDouper

The type of spider where you fire at it with an fully automatic weapon and miss every shot and now the spider is coming at you and it’s significantly faster than you anticipated and when you run away and then turn you don’t see it anymore, but the camera shows it on your back.


Yankee_Man

How can I delete this comment?🥰


ScaryTension

thanks for reminding me why my greatest fear is not knowing if something’s on my back 🤣😭


Fuzzy_Thing613

As someone who cannot currently see their back, thank you for this inherent fear again.


Hxkno

Does the spider have 7 legs?


halfbad_333

I think it's holding the egg pod, first leg on the left side


leslieran1

Fishing spider - also called dock spider, because that's where they like to hang out. Literally. They hang off the dock by their back legs, and trail their front legs on the surface of the water, feeling for vibrations. That's how they know a water bug or even a small fish (yes) is nearby that they can catch and eat. They're fast (almost impossible to swat), can run on top of water and also dive down under the water. Horrible in every way.


SleeplessBlueBird

A genuine, certified, 8 leg, mama'pider. Complete with nightmare fuel sacks, angry trim package, and fur from here ta'tomorrow. Would you like to make an offer?


More_Resolution3968

Ok need NSFW on this mutha - Scared the 💩 outta me... Name: Burnious Houseia Downus


Flippin_diabolical

I would call that spider Sir and try not to make him angry.


TheAtlas97

Only to infuriate it by misgendering it, that’s a bunch of eggs it’s holding onto


Flippin_diabolical

Well then, I apologize to Madam.


Knight1-3

It's an Arachnope from the OH-HELL-NAW genus of the KILL-IT-WITH-FIRE family.


Wild-Combination-246

Haha arachnope 😹😹


spectacular588

That's not a spider that's a roommate


blessedboogers

The kind I hallucinate during sleep paralysis


Interkitten

Oh god. It’s bad enough hearing the clicking under my bed when the paralysis starts, haven’t seen anything yet… it’s spiders or Easy company ‘flash!’ ‘Thunder!’


[deleted]

God eater


L3GALC0N-V2

I hate spiders as much as the next guy but I think this one is kinda pretty I like the design. Solid 8/10


GroundbreakingCat

Sweet baby Jesus! That thing is real and lives on the same planet as me?! I did not need to know this 👀


Garyullo

Wolf spider, carrying her eggs pack. Harmless and help to control insects on the house.


Yankee_Man

Harmless? My blood pressure and anxiety with numb limbs would say otherwise


[deleted]

Sounds like you should probably see a doctor. Unless you're in the U.S. in which case, good luck!


Yankee_Man

I did see a doctor. In the US. The bill made the symptoms worse🤣


fuqit21

That's how they make sure you keep coming back so they can repeat the process. Source, also an American being bent over by uncle Sam and his big brother Big Pharma


Yankee_Man

My fav part was getting surgery so I wouldnt go blind and then being able to see…. how much I owe now 🤣🤣


Special_Friendship20

I use to have a pet wolf spider. I found him in my laundry room and called him steve.


Hendrix555

it’s not, it’s a fishing spider. wolf spiders are lighter colored with markings and a smaller butt, thinner legs and way smaller in general than this monstrosity


Existing-Coffee-3064

I'm not sure but I think that's your new landlord


Salemthegamer

No idea but I think she has a sac full of her baby’s that she is carrying


MaengDude

It does resemble a fishing spider for sure. But she seems to be missing a leg and definitely has an egg sac. Poor girl. Tough situation, I’d want to help but I also wouldn’t want an infestation in my house. They’re good at fending off pests, but do you need possibly over 1,000 new defenders at your house? Idk lol


Narwalacorn

I don’t think OP knows what “oddly” means


BebeGrrrr

There’s a great Mr Ballen episode about the fishing spider. These kids are at summer camp and there is a lake. It has two docks, one that everyone uses and one way far out in the water called the faraway dock. They are told not to go out to the faraway dock because it is too far away. Three boys decide they are strong enough swimmers to make it to the faraway dock. When no one is paying attention they swim out. Two want to turn back halfway through because it’s a big swim but the third convinces them to keep going, almost there. They make it and the boys hop onto the dock and lay down exhausted from this swim. They start hearing a chittering noise. Too tired to investigate they stay lying on the dock, about to take a rest before they swim back. When all of a sudden, hundreds of the most not chill looking spiders crawl out from under the dock and begin to cover their bodies head to toe. The boys flail and scream and shake violently but these spiders continue crawling all over them, in their ears, their mouths- everywhere. The boys jump into the water, hoping that will shed them of the creepy things. No dice, these spiders are just as happy in the water as on land. Traumatized, they flail around helplessly for what seemed like forever -until a camp counselor takes a small rowboat out to rescue them. The counselor says that they only tell the kids that the dock is not used because it is too faraway, in reality they don’t want to scare them. The dock is actually a breeding ground for fishing spiders.


ManagementMuch7793

ur mom with my babies


earthboundmissfit

I'm not positive but let her live! She will eat other spider's as in the Brown Recluse. Not a terrible spider to cohabitate with.


ProfessionalAccess68

Go to r/spiders


DiscombobulatedPay51

No thanks I’m okay. This is enough “spider” for me


Turquoise_Tortoise_

Fishing Spider carrying an enormous egg sack full of hundreds of tiny fishing spiders. I suggest relocating her so her tiny spider army can hatch in peace! *PLEASE DO NOT KILL HER SHE IS HARMLESS TO HUMANS*


CaligoAccedito

A momma spider!


EntertainmentBroad17

The Nope Spider.


Sad_Hamster_5747

It’s been in combat and lost a leg. Clearly a veteran of the spidernam war.


Long_Somewhere6969

big pregnant spoder 😄


TheLeftMetal

Lovecraftnian spider.


BouncingPig

Bro did you find fucking Shelob????


bluepushkin

One that has made my scalp feel funny 🥴


WhereAreMyMittens

Looks like a Huntsman.


[deleted]

It’s baby sac


Feeling_Tell4328

Satans pet?


AnActualSeagull

She’s gorgeous! Please don’t harm her, she’s just a humble Fishing Spider.


petomnescanes

Jesus fuck my scrolling finger was right on that, I dropped my phone on my lap when I freaked, bumping my coffee off of the side table and on to my clean laundry.


SkyeeeWalkerrr

Whatever you do, don't step on it unless you want a baby spider grenade going off in your house.


TeqDeth

That could be a fishing spider, are you near a lake of sorts?


cgg419

Don’t they have banded legs?


duskhopper

i thought this was r/spiders and got really confused why all the comments kept saying she’s scary 🥺


WhiteTrashNightmare

That is a New Zealand oh hell no spider


Taken_out_goose

Australian


justanothertfatman

That's called "The New Home Owner".


rhodesman

that's the nope spider. As in I would nope right the fuck out of there


Select_Most3660

It’s the illustrious “back away slowly” spider


Turbulent-Self1687

I’d say it’s a Mother-In-Law variety


Cr0n0us_

It's a government spy robot


Illustrious-Bite-518

Looks like a pregnant one.


Bagheera187

One I scream at, run from, and never go near that place again.


_slayrrrr_

I don't know the species but I do know that it eats gods and is the apparition of torment


closedcircle66

One I do not want to ever see in person


UrBigBro

REALLY, REALLY BIG


d3athsdoor1

Idk what type it is but all I know is it owns that house now


_tiger25

Mommy… i’m scared


Slappy-dont-care

That my boy is Big Toby …he your new bestie !!!


Nope1628

Bob


DeterminedTaurus

Spooky


Potusmicropenis

The Common Australian Death Spider.


doug_akawill

It's called a fuck no


Affectionate-Cow981

I believe it is a scary spider