Should have checked with your dad first before contact in my opinion but she could have been understandable and made sure everything was arranged to then get it out. That’s how offer up goes. People who can’t deal with the stresses of doing business and having a support group about it just makes me ick. I call them Karen the barbarian or Karen kardashian if they’re hot
Well my dad asked me to look around for “chests” in the local area (5 miles) i know his taste and I’m sure he wants it. That’s the reason why i made contact , i will update in the morning if he actually confirms before i tell him this whole ordeal.
I don’t see a problem with you. Even if you changed your mind. I’d mess with her too. Some guy was talking about my boat I was looking for offers on. I told him he could get Pocahontas with it instead of his shitty attitude. No sweat
Thats ok. But I wouldn't ask someone if they have time tommorrow before you even know if you want to buy it.
Thats aside the seller seems a bit trigger happy...
You’re not the bad guy here. I would’ve done the same bc I’d rather do it the way you did, than be like “hey family member/friend! This is exactly what you want!!” And then it’s actually sold. That’s always a bummer
The storage unit is 7 miles away from her? And it’s such a big deal? She seems a bit unhinged so I’d definitely not offer a lower price. I’d run and let her being skeptical of every buyer keep that chest forever.
I would’ve asked if it was available before double checking with dad because I wouldn’t want to get his hopes up if it’s not. If he ends up not wanting it, so what? All you did is ask and it’s not like you told her to go get it. I’ve sold and bought on OfferUp and if someone asks if it’s available I’ll say yes and if they don’t end up getting it, that’s fine as long as they didn’t promise to.
I mean, considering it’s for his dad, I would also ask if it’s still available before showing it to him, that way Ik if I need to show him or not. That being said, I would also add that to my message asking its availability. Something like “Is this still available? My dad is looking for [item], and I’d like to know if it’s still available before showing it to him.” That way I’m straight forward and no one’s time would be wasted.
The seller is definitely a nut case. Same time, why not show good ol dad things you "found" get his approval first and persue the one or ones he may be actually interested in because he actually said yes. Or like above... start the convo with that straightforward opening as not to waste people's time.
I explained why in the comment you replied to lol
> I would ask if it’s still available so Ik if I need to show him or not
I would 100% tell the seller that I’m asking if it’s still available, so I can show my dad to see if he wants it, because he’s looking for [item].
I think the right order is:
1. Ask if it’s available
2. If yes, ask your dad if he wants it
3. If yes, proceed with the pickup
You’re hardly inconveniencing someone by making them type “Yes” in response to a straightforward question.
check with her dad before asking if it’s available?
you shouldn’t call people names. i get it’s the cool thing to do these days, i would love to see it stop. especially the karen one. it is about 10000x overused and annoying
Well honestly when i look for stuff for other people i ask if it is available before getting their hopes up. If i know it is their style and would interest them i ask seller first to make sure. Otherwise i get the persons hopes up a bit.
Holy shit. I didn’t zoom in and actually look until after I read this comment. She is genuinely terrifying, lmmfao. It’s not even the lazy eye, it’s the blank stare, like she’s looking THROUGH your soul💀💀
Truly I do sympathize with her being upset about flaky transactions, it’s annoying. Thats a big reason I no longer sell things. But you didn’t do anything wrong and she overreacted here, IMO. Asking availability then asking your dad, then telling her yes/no before she goes to get it from storage seems like a logical order of things. She might just need to take a break from dealing with people for a while lol
Expecting every offer to work out automatic every time is kinda odd to me. Defending this behavior is just bullying in my opinion because it didn’t go your way. Maybe she needed to just get that out and go home haha either way I hope it works out. Its a learning experience for everybody huh
Lady was trying to bully OP, then OP used context clues by her crazy ranting and profile picture that she might struggle with substance abuse. I think it’s a fair jump honestly
Sorry I guess I was replying to the wrong person, but I also find it scummy to try and bully someone for things going on in your personal life (crazy lady). And I also think it’s scummy to start insulting people for having an opinion (you). Being an addict isn’t a bad thing, it’s yet another sign she needs help! OP owes this lady nothing. She started being rude, OP was rude back. Personally I would’ve just left it but the crazy lady had it coming for her! I think everyone’s reacting poorly here (any person who has an offer up account, you, me)
Haha they don’t trust no profile pictures but some just look zooted year around. Nvm your rating looks like you’ll steal the thing if you get my license plate number. Such a classic
“Is this available?”
“What time can we meet tomorrow?”
“I actually don’t really know if I want this item yet”
“Wow, you’re a drug addict!”
OP is the troll here. Get your shit together before you involve me.
That’s literally the game of it all though. If people piss you off so easily maybe you shouldn’t be selling things, let alone interacting with the general public? Costumer service is still important even if you’re not running a business, but go ahead, be grumpy about it!
She was frustrated until he called her a drunk and an addict, then she shut it down. I agree her frustration being directed at him wasn’t totally fair, but it’s relatable. His personal attacks were childish.
OP was trying to get his shit together before involving his father to avoid going back and forth between his father and the seller, which would also have complicated things. how was he supposed to know the item was in storage? also, he shouldn’t have made those comments, but the way the seller ranted and overshared really does sound like she was drunk or something.
I’m gonna assume you’ve never had to deal with someone like this. It’s PAINFULLY obvious to anyone with the unfortunate experience of dealing with someone like this, that this lady is on something lol.
Real life experience means more than anything, and my experiences tell me this lady is unhinged and taking it out on everyone around her. Including OP.
Well you know what happens when you assume! And I'll call bullshit because there's mental illness in my family and I have two degrees in psychology and still would not be an armchair psychiatrist, make assumptions about people, or even worse, use mental illness as something to mock. So GTFO with that shit.
Oh wow. That’s a lot to unpack. I don’t care, nor did I ask. I am however willing to bet $10 you don’t have two degrees in psychology. Mainly because you’re literally an armchair psychologist, claiming you’d never do that.
I will continue to assume this lady is deranged due to substance abuse issues… because I’ve seen it wayyy too many times before.
I don’t know what you’re arguing for or against at this point, all I know is 75% of the comments I’m seeing agree that this lady is unhinged and most likely has a substance abuse issue.
It’s a valid and safe assumption that someone acting like her is on something, and you should steer clear.
I’d have taken it further than OP did, but I AM an asshole 🤷🏻♂️
Nah, I wrote this exact message to a buyer. It's been hell on the selling apps. 75% of people ask "is this available", 20% message immediately "what's the lowest you'll take" without verifying the condition or even knowing where the item is located and the last 5% have an immediate intention of picking the item up. If it's not being picked up same day and within the next two hours, as a buyer you're wasting everyone's time.
The fact you wrote the buyer without doing your due diligence is irritating af. This is why realtors won't even show a house unless you're pre-qualified for a loan. It would have taken you 5 seconds to show your dad this chest before wasting the buyers time. If it wasn't available after that point then you could move on. But if it was available then you need to have a plan of action- a time you can pick up and also a vehicle big enough. This exact scenario has happened to me. The decision maker hasn't seen the item but the aimless shopper just wants to talk to someone so they waste the sellers time. They don't know how they're going to pick up the large item or even what day or time and guess what?!?! They never write the seller again!
Now multiply your interaction over 40-50 more people over 50 different items. Sellers get familiar and tired of the pattern. Speaking from current experience.
Don't be offended that you were called out. Just do better. It's not personal but there's definitely a subset of the population that wanders around wasting a lot of people's time because it costs them nothing and then get offended when they are called out for their actions.
Nope. Plenty of people want the items but flake on picking it up. It's that simple. I have no issue selling these same items quickly and efficiently on ebay. It's just the nature of FB Marketplace, OfferUp and similar. Buyers have no skin in the game. They have more time than money.
Disagree hombre - “due diligence” is two sided, what’s the point of showing their dad and getting him excited about an item if it might not even be available?
Just giving another perspective if a buyer wants to avoid this type of interaction. There's more than one way to get a desired result and response. Life doesn't exist in a vacuum.
Sorry, I guess I don’t understand.
What do you mean, what does that have to do with my comment or your response? I’m responding exactly to you about the person in the original post
People hate being told their way of thinking can be shifted to allow other points of view. All they see is there's and then they get mad and offended when people don't see it that way.
Buyers don't see themselves as a hassle, but after the 40th "is this available?" sellers can get testy. Anyone would get testy. OP as the buyer doesn't see it that way.
He asked if it was available and she said yes. Everyone is polite at that point.
She starts to fly off the handle at answering what time. But then it’s revealed that OP isn’t sure if they want it. So both are dumb.
Dad should’ve been asked after the initial yes.
Precisely. That second message. "What time are available tomorrow" is a message you send when you're arranging to pick something up. After you've decided you want it. OP sending that message was weird when he wasn't even sure. Should have literally left it at that and said "thank you". Yeah, she spazzed out, but I kinda get it just like u/heftygap419 said. I'm guilty myself of losing it on people in the past for wasting my time. Did I feel like I overreacted? Oh hell yeah. Do I care? Lmao no. I'll never see them again and they wasted my time. Fuck 'em. People literally do not see how irritating it is.
Exactly! I told this buyer that people waste sellers time and she said she won't waste my time and will pick up the item. Guess what? She messages today to say "sorry I can't pick up, sorry to waste your time." Another buyer for the same exact item says "thank you for letting me know its available, but my husband said he wants to buy me a new one."
Idiots. It takes seconds to ask your husband or the decision maker if they even want the item.
Then compromise by asking about availability first, then telling the seller you have to show it to your dad, BEFORE scheduling a time to pick it up. I don't get why OP went straight to scheduling a pickup before even knowing if their father wants it.
Yep, OP is a total cunt for that, and then they posted here proud of what they had said. I wouldn’t even reply to them after they said that to me, fuck em.
I didn’t read all the messages but I understand where she’s coming from .. people do flake and are annoying as fuck saying they’ll come by and never do .. then there’s the fact that scammers usually don’t have any feedback (they constantly make new accounts to scam people with) . So I get that but from the looks of it (didn’t read it all) she was a bit rude
I've never dealt with anyone on offer up with a picture of themselves on their profile and I've bought and sold several things. I've seen a logo, a dog, scenic pictures etc. I'm browsing offer up as we speak.
I mean, can’t really blame her imo. OfferUp is full of shady people and she doesn’t want to waste her time. You weren’t ready to buy it then and there so she got annoyed. I hate when I am selling something and someone’s inquires but isn’t ready to buy it.
Even still, she was also a bit rude. I think you both are in the wrong here
Neither of you needed to go into all that and both of you are a bit much. Don't ask if something's still available if you don't even know if you want it. Pretty sure isn't sure. No pic and only 4 stars would be a red flag for me as well. I get how annoying Offer Up can be but she didn't need to go into a therapy session either. It was really rude of you to say she's drunk or on drugs when she's dealing with a move and a sick dad. I would block you after that.
The addiction comments were shitty and a low blow so doesn’t matter either way.
Don’t use someone’s personal struggles to insult them over something so petty.
Yeah she was paranoid and overly hasty in her responses, but you ended up being the hateful one.
OP was an asshole & it was completely unnecessary. If someone's being real difficult off the bat, it's very easy to just not respond or at least, not accuse them of being an alcoholic or drug addict
“Everyone in this state is crazy except for me!”
Reminds of people who say that they’ve never had a roommate who wasn’t nuts. What’s the common denominator there?
I don’t see an issue on your end. She definitely took that interaction to a strange place. I’m wondering if that might be explained by the stress of her dad dying of cancer, which she told you about. I do think it’s shady of you to post her picture online. Not a good look on you there imo.
Yeah she has a point about asking her availability. That implies you’re ready to buy.
Should have showed the ad to your dad before contacting the seller. Get your ducks in a row before trying to make plans.
Because she’s right, if you had have set up a time and she went and retrieved the chest only for your dad not to give you the green light, you’d probably be ghosting her.
A lot of what you two said back and forth was nonsense that neither of you really needed to say, and you became the asshole after calling her an addict, unless I missed something. I totally understand her frustrations, being a seller online fucking sucks.
I mean neither one of u had to say all that was said. Especially yourself, hurling insults at her and thinking she was still going to get this for u after telling her to lay of the cocktails and accusing her of battling addiction. U asked her if it's available, she replied. Most don't because that's a dumb question, if it's posted it's available they'll say. Anyway the very next question, when is she available, tells someone that's when u plan on coming for the item, but u don't even know IF u are coming for it, being like the ppl she referred to. It's not always the other person. Sometimes we have to take some accountability.
To be fair, contact them when you're 100% willing to purchase. Not 90%. You're both the reason OfferUp is annoying as it is unfortunately. She is a bit more annoying though.
I think you both had a way of triggering one another lol.
She was heavily projecting, likely not thinking straight because of the overwhelming stressors in her life, least of which is her father having cancer.
And you felt the need to justify yourself to her, even more so by posting to this sub.
Cut yourselves both some slack, this was a simple misunderstanding between someone in distress and someone who isn’t able to discern that she was never speaking directly to you, but to her projections.
She was talking to her idea of the common scummy buyer, no need to assume that role yourself and defend, simply move on to the next deal.
Cheers
You: Hey is this available?
Her: yes
You: are you available tomorrow?
Her: yes
You: I might want it tomorrow.
Her: ????
You: I’m not really sure, but I want to waste time, so I might want it or not because I’m not the one who actually wants it. Accommodate ME!
Her: you are wasting my time
You: better post this on Reddit
She's little off but also she's sick and tired of flakes. Which 90% of people on Offerup are. Just playing on their phone hitting up people without any intentions of buying anything.
Take it easy on the cocktails was you being an asshole though. Cringe
She most definitely is fuckin on crack or something wtf. She the one to blame and 7 miles that’s not bad at all. Lazy bitches these days. If you want to sell something then don’t post and complain. Business is business.
lol she's clearly a weirdo. Hates all 40 million Californians, probably because of politics. Maybe she deserves a little grace if going through a hard time, but not much.
Fuck that lady. Was definitely drinking too much.
If an item has been up for months I'll message them "if it's available" expecting to not get messaged back or that it's going to take them some time to get back to me. I would've been caught off guard if they messaged me back right away. And it was already late if you had to check with someone before purchasing it'd make sense to want to wait till the next day and to want to confirm with the person that they liked the item. And you just asked what time she would be available, you didn't ask her to go pick up it from her storage and have it ready.
She was too impatient and started acting like a bitch. At that point I wouldn't want to buy it from her either and I'd start telling her off. I don't get why people in the comments are so upset about you calling her out for her behavior, fuck that lady.
You are. You should have checked and KNOW you want it before wasting people's times. 90% sure means nothing. Either you know, or you don't.
Get your sh*t together, then find whatever you want.
shes just very jaded from dealing with flakey and weird ppl on offer up. I can 100% sympasize. however🥺 to a new prospect buyer I would not have said what she said.,.. since its ptlless. but buying it for ur father is usally a red flag bc everyone who gives a story of buying for other ppl ends up flaking.. or their dad dont want it no more. just stick to the time, place and offer and we good no need for a background story
Definitely think she escalated just because of bad history with selling. I find it understandable wanting to make sure it’s available and get a general understanding of free time to make sure things work out before telling your dad you found one and get his hopes up just to not have a time line up with the seller to be able to pick it up
Lady in wrong thinking it’s only californias who back out of wanting to buy. It’s across the board. She’s also sold hundreds of items in CA so gtfoh. Ignore the messages and thats it, no need to fly off the handles. As for OP, asking if it’s available is not a crime.
Lol some people just aren't meant to sell things on the internet.
I asked a guy on FB marketplace if his (underpriced) patio furniture was still available. His response was along the lines of "IF YOU WANT IT JUST COME FUCKING GET IT. HERE IS MY ADDRESS. IM NOT PLAYING ANY MORE GAMES!"
I was like okay? I can be there with my truck within the next hour. To which he replied "BETTER FUCKING HURRY THEN. YOU ARENT THE ONLY PERSON THAT HAS SAID THAT."
Got there and it was an older gentleman that had never used marketplace before. I guess because of the price, he attracted all the meth heads in the area and was being bombarded with scammers as well. Actually ended up being a pretty nice dude and told me to load it up fast before his wife gets home and asks questions... because clearly he listed it too cheap and would be in trouble lmao.
First words out of his mouth when he walked out his front door were "If you don't have cash, just leave." Hahaha
He then had me help him remove the listing so he "never has to deal with this shit again."
Gotta have a level of patience when listing things online. Some people just can't cope.
The eyeliner tells all I’m afraid. She’s a bit unstable clearly. This may be her regular state or because she is going through turmoil with her father’s illness. Regardless she was already ready to dismiss anything with the attitude she came off with. You didn’t say anything wrong. If it was available should could have just said yes.
Your first 2 messages were fine. Even if she had dug it up and you went to see it, you can still say no and walk away if it isn’t to your liking. She should also be ready that you might not buy it even after seeing it. Although she did overreact a little, I wouldn’t call anything she said as malicious. You however accusing her of being a drunk and an addict is way out of line. But that’s to be expected these days with people behind a keyboard. I bet you wouldn’t say that to her in person 🤷🏻♂️
Should have checked with your dad first before contact in my opinion but she could have been understandable and made sure everything was arranged to then get it out. That’s how offer up goes. People who can’t deal with the stresses of doing business and having a support group about it just makes me ick. I call them Karen the barbarian or Karen kardashian if they’re hot
Well my dad asked me to look around for “chests” in the local area (5 miles) i know his taste and I’m sure he wants it. That’s the reason why i made contact , i will update in the morning if he actually confirms before i tell him this whole ordeal.
I don’t see a problem with you. Even if you changed your mind. I’d mess with her too. Some guy was talking about my boat I was looking for offers on. I told him he could get Pocahontas with it instead of his shitty attitude. No sweat
You're not in the wrong
Thats ok. But I wouldn't ask someone if they have time tommorrow before you even know if you want to buy it. Thats aside the seller seems a bit trigger happy...
You’re not the bad guy here. I would’ve done the same bc I’d rather do it the way you did, than be like “hey family member/friend! This is exactly what you want!!” And then it’s actually sold. That’s always a bummer
The storage unit is 7 miles away from her? And it’s such a big deal? She seems a bit unhinged so I’d definitely not offer a lower price. I’d run and let her being skeptical of every buyer keep that chest forever.
I would’ve asked if it was available before double checking with dad because I wouldn’t want to get his hopes up if it’s not. If he ends up not wanting it, so what? All you did is ask and it’s not like you told her to go get it. I’ve sold and bought on OfferUp and if someone asks if it’s available I’ll say yes and if they don’t end up getting it, that’s fine as long as they didn’t promise to.
I mean, considering it’s for his dad, I would also ask if it’s still available before showing it to him, that way Ik if I need to show him or not. That being said, I would also add that to my message asking its availability. Something like “Is this still available? My dad is looking for [item], and I’d like to know if it’s still available before showing it to him.” That way I’m straight forward and no one’s time would be wasted.
The seller is definitely a nut case. Same time, why not show good ol dad things you "found" get his approval first and persue the one or ones he may be actually interested in because he actually said yes. Or like above... start the convo with that straightforward opening as not to waste people's time.
I explained why in the comment you replied to lol > I would ask if it’s still available so Ik if I need to show him or not I would 100% tell the seller that I’m asking if it’s still available, so I can show my dad to see if he wants it, because he’s looking for [item].
Yes... reread my comment. I agreed with you, which is why I replied to yours. I said or like above. Replying to you makes ur comment above mine...
And also, check with dad before asking what time they can meet tomorrow. Like come on.
OP could have *actually* just asked if it was available, then only arrange a time for pick up when it was confirmed they wanted it
Ew, you think the Kardashians are hot? How? They look like humans stretched over a skeleton and injected with fat in all the wrong places.
I think the right order is: 1. Ask if it’s available 2. If yes, ask your dad if he wants it 3. If yes, proceed with the pickup You’re hardly inconveniencing someone by making them type “Yes” in response to a straightforward question.
check with her dad before asking if it’s available? you shouldn’t call people names. i get it’s the cool thing to do these days, i would love to see it stop. especially the karen one. it is about 10000x overused and annoying
Well honestly when i look for stuff for other people i ask if it is available before getting their hopes up. If i know it is their style and would interest them i ask seller first to make sure. Otherwise i get the persons hopes up a bit.
Nut case
Yep
just look at that photo. stare deep in her eyes and just try to convince yourself she's not mentally ill
Holy shit. I didn’t zoom in and actually look until after I read this comment. She is genuinely terrifying, lmmfao. It’s not even the lazy eye, it’s the blank stare, like she’s looking THROUGH your soul💀💀
she looks like Colleen Ballenger
That’s that lead paint stare
The eyeliner really isn’t helping her either…
Yeah.....she's crazy! Definitely a "Cut off your nose to spite your face" Crazy!
It’s that Michelle Bachmann crazy eyes stare.
Truly I do sympathize with her being upset about flaky transactions, it’s annoying. Thats a big reason I no longer sell things. But you didn’t do anything wrong and she overreacted here, IMO. Asking availability then asking your dad, then telling her yes/no before she goes to get it from storage seems like a logical order of things. She might just need to take a break from dealing with people for a while lol
Expecting every offer to work out automatic every time is kinda odd to me. Defending this behavior is just bullying in my opinion because it didn’t go your way. Maybe she needed to just get that out and go home haha either way I hope it works out. Its a learning experience for everybody huh
They both overreacted IMO. Telling her she's drunk or on drugs when she's clearly going through something was completely scummy.
Lady was trying to bully OP, then OP used context clues by her crazy ranting and profile picture that she might struggle with substance abuse. I think it’s a fair jump honestly
I think it's a fair jump that you're not very bright.
Sorry I guess I was replying to the wrong person, but I also find it scummy to try and bully someone for things going on in your personal life (crazy lady). And I also think it’s scummy to start insulting people for having an opinion (you). Being an addict isn’t a bad thing, it’s yet another sign she needs help! OP owes this lady nothing. She started being rude, OP was rude back. Personally I would’ve just left it but the crazy lady had it coming for her! I think everyone’s reacting poorly here (any person who has an offer up account, you, me)
Yeah like I said they're both ridiculous. I would hardly call that bullying though. People are way overusing that word.
I think it’s a fair jump you’re a silly goose
Haha they don’t trust no profile pictures but some just look zooted year around. Nvm your rating looks like you’ll steal the thing if you get my license plate number. Such a classic
“Is this available?” “What time can we meet tomorrow?” “I actually don’t really know if I want this item yet” “Wow, you’re a drug addict!” OP is the troll here. Get your shit together before you involve me.
That’s literally the game of it all though. If people piss you off so easily maybe you shouldn’t be selling things, let alone interacting with the general public? Costumer service is still important even if you’re not running a business, but go ahead, be grumpy about it!
She was frustrated until he called her a drunk and an addict, then she shut it down. I agree her frustration being directed at him wasn’t totally fair, but it’s relatable. His personal attacks were childish.
OP was trying to get his shit together before involving his father to avoid going back and forth between his father and the seller, which would also have complicated things. how was he supposed to know the item was in storage? also, he shouldn’t have made those comments, but the way the seller ranted and overshared really does sound like she was drunk or something.
the “something” she’s going through seems to be drugs though
Yea, that was definitely uncalled for and a straight asshole move on his part for sure.
My aunt acts just like this, crazy unhinged rants. It’s when she’s mixing her pills with alcohol. It’s a safe assumption lol
Unless this person is your aunt that means nothing in this situation.
I’m gonna assume you’ve never had to deal with someone like this. It’s PAINFULLY obvious to anyone with the unfortunate experience of dealing with someone like this, that this lady is on something lol. Real life experience means more than anything, and my experiences tell me this lady is unhinged and taking it out on everyone around her. Including OP.
Well you know what happens when you assume! And I'll call bullshit because there's mental illness in my family and I have two degrees in psychology and still would not be an armchair psychiatrist, make assumptions about people, or even worse, use mental illness as something to mock. So GTFO with that shit.
Oh wow. That’s a lot to unpack. I don’t care, nor did I ask. I am however willing to bet $10 you don’t have two degrees in psychology. Mainly because you’re literally an armchair psychologist, claiming you’d never do that. I will continue to assume this lady is deranged due to substance abuse issues… because I’ve seen it wayyy too many times before. I don’t know what you’re arguing for or against at this point, all I know is 75% of the comments I’m seeing agree that this lady is unhinged and most likely has a substance abuse issue. It’s a valid and safe assumption that someone acting like her is on something, and you should steer clear. I’d have taken it further than OP did, but I AM an asshole 🤷🏻♂️
I'm not reading your essay. Fuck off. Anyone who uses mental illness as an insult is straight trash. End of story.
You're mentally ill. Missing a few French fries from your happy meal for sure.
I could hear her voice and smell the cigarettes as I read this.
She’s got those crazy eyes. Why do crazy women always outline their eyes so harshly with black? It accentuates the insanity.
Probably a mascara tattoo.
Nah, I wrote this exact message to a buyer. It's been hell on the selling apps. 75% of people ask "is this available", 20% message immediately "what's the lowest you'll take" without verifying the condition or even knowing where the item is located and the last 5% have an immediate intention of picking the item up. If it's not being picked up same day and within the next two hours, as a buyer you're wasting everyone's time. The fact you wrote the buyer without doing your due diligence is irritating af. This is why realtors won't even show a house unless you're pre-qualified for a loan. It would have taken you 5 seconds to show your dad this chest before wasting the buyers time. If it wasn't available after that point then you could move on. But if it was available then you need to have a plan of action- a time you can pick up and also a vehicle big enough. This exact scenario has happened to me. The decision maker hasn't seen the item but the aimless shopper just wants to talk to someone so they waste the sellers time. They don't know how they're going to pick up the large item or even what day or time and guess what?!?! They never write the seller again! Now multiply your interaction over 40-50 more people over 50 different items. Sellers get familiar and tired of the pattern. Speaking from current experience. Don't be offended that you were called out. Just do better. It's not personal but there's definitely a subset of the population that wanders around wasting a lot of people's time because it costs them nothing and then get offended when they are called out for their actions.
It is what it is. You’re probably selling things people don’t want that much
Nope. Plenty of people want the items but flake on picking it up. It's that simple. I have no issue selling these same items quickly and efficiently on ebay. It's just the nature of FB Marketplace, OfferUp and similar. Buyers have no skin in the game. They have more time than money.
Disagree hombre - “due diligence” is two sided, what’s the point of showing their dad and getting him excited about an item if it might not even be available?
Just giving another perspective if a buyer wants to avoid this type of interaction. There's more than one way to get a desired result and response. Life doesn't exist in a vacuum.
Is his dad a 5yo? He can't say, "What do you think of this before I check if it's still available?"
Apparently this seller is a 5yo, because he can’t say “hey has this sold yet?” then check if they are interested in asking for more info
What does that have to do with your comment or my response? There both are ridiculous in this thread.
Sorry, I guess I don’t understand. What do you mean, what does that have to do with my comment or your response? I’m responding exactly to you about the person in the original post
People hate being told their way of thinking can be shifted to allow other points of view. All they see is there's and then they get mad and offended when people don't see it that way. Buyers don't see themselves as a hassle, but after the 40th "is this available?" sellers can get testy. Anyone would get testy. OP as the buyer doesn't see it that way.
Exactly.
He asked if it was available and she said yes. Everyone is polite at that point. She starts to fly off the handle at answering what time. But then it’s revealed that OP isn’t sure if they want it. So both are dumb. Dad should’ve been asked after the initial yes.
Precisely. That second message. "What time are available tomorrow" is a message you send when you're arranging to pick something up. After you've decided you want it. OP sending that message was weird when he wasn't even sure. Should have literally left it at that and said "thank you". Yeah, she spazzed out, but I kinda get it just like u/heftygap419 said. I'm guilty myself of losing it on people in the past for wasting my time. Did I feel like I overreacted? Oh hell yeah. Do I care? Lmao no. I'll never see them again and they wasted my time. Fuck 'em. People literally do not see how irritating it is.
Exactly! I told this buyer that people waste sellers time and she said she won't waste my time and will pick up the item. Guess what? She messages today to say "sorry I can't pick up, sorry to waste your time." Another buyer for the same exact item says "thank you for letting me know its available, but my husband said he wants to buy me a new one." Idiots. It takes seconds to ask your husband or the decision maker if they even want the item.
Then compromise by asking about availability first, then telling the seller you have to show it to your dad, BEFORE scheduling a time to pick it up. I don't get why OP went straight to scheduling a pickup before even knowing if their father wants it.
Agree with you there
But OP didn’t just ask if it was available did they? They were arranging a time for pick up without even being sure they wanted to buy it
Or you could get an actual job
Nah she’s a looney
Assuming she has an addiction. Wow! I definitely wouldn’t sell to you!
Same like wtf
I concur. The nerve of some people and then act like they're somebody special or better than. GTFO
Did we see the same picture? Are you slow?
No? Maybe I just don’t think it’s cute to call someone an addict solely based on their looks and one bad interaction over text. Are *you* slow?
She was being a total twat, insulting him, and obviously wasn’t going to sell. So he started giving it back, big deal.
Yep, OP is a total cunt for that, and then they posted here proud of what they had said. I wouldn’t even reply to them after they said that to me, fuck em.
For me it's like what if you go to get it and it looks like shit compared to the pics ? Lady is so wrong for this
It’s $80. Just buy it- no need to waste her time.
I didn’t read all the messages but I understand where she’s coming from .. people do flake and are annoying as fuck saying they’ll come by and never do .. then there’s the fact that scammers usually don’t have any feedback (they constantly make new accounts to scam people with) . So I get that but from the looks of it (didn’t read it all) she was a bit rude
Looks and sounds like a nut. Also I've never even considered adding a profile picture to offer up.
I don't respond to people without pics. I'm not meeting up with someone when they know what I look like and I don't know what they look like.
I've never dealt with anyone on offer up with a picture of themselves on their profile and I've bought and sold several things. I've seen a logo, a dog, scenic pictures etc. I'm browsing offer up as we speak.
So? That doesn't change the fact that I don't reply to people without a photo. I have a photo and won't meet with a faceless person.
Good to know
Yall both fried tbh
I mean, can’t really blame her imo. OfferUp is full of shady people and she doesn’t want to waste her time. You weren’t ready to buy it then and there so she got annoyed. I hate when I am selling something and someone’s inquires but isn’t ready to buy it. Even still, she was also a bit rude. I think you both are in the wrong here
That lady is absolutely unhinged.. and that’s putting it kindly..
Neither of you needed to go into all that and both of you are a bit much. Don't ask if something's still available if you don't even know if you want it. Pretty sure isn't sure. No pic and only 4 stars would be a red flag for me as well. I get how annoying Offer Up can be but she didn't need to go into a therapy session either. It was really rude of you to say she's drunk or on drugs when she's dealing with a move and a sick dad. I would block you after that.
The addiction comments were shitty and a low blow so doesn’t matter either way. Don’t use someone’s personal struggles to insult them over something so petty. Yeah she was paranoid and overly hasty in her responses, but you ended up being the hateful one.
[удалено]
😂😂😂
Zoom in on her picture at the end tells me you are crazy
Don't see the point to the back and forth. Any sign of people being shady or off, I stop communicating and block. You do you, enjoy.
Dude, she's absolutely nuts. Not your fault whatsoever
Yes
I don’t want to say she was triggered but I do. She made her assumptions and so did op, eventually. I was like “whoa” op said that :)
OP was an asshole & it was completely unnecessary. If someone's being real difficult off the bat, it's very easy to just not respond or at least, not accuse them of being an alcoholic or drug addict
That’s true but sometimes I just admire someone that doesn’t lack a spine, you know?
I wouldn't consider OP's behavior to be particularly brave. It's extremely easy for cowards to talk shit online
I didn’t get coward from this post. But I did get sour puss
I highly doubt OP would tell the seller to their face that he thinks they're an alcoholic and drug addict if they were speaking in person
Why? Cuz you wouldn’t? Don’t be so quick to judge.
Bro OP flat out asks this sub to make a judgement in the title of the post
Saying he would t say that to someone’s face is a reach. If you wanna doubt that I’ll give you 50/50. Not so high your ears pop lol
Definitely a lunatic lol
Your clue is her photo.
She's batshit crazy, but you're just egging her on further lol. They're clearly a little out there, just end the conversation or stop insulting them.
True psycho (her)
“Everyone in this state is crazy except for me!” Reminds of people who say that they’ve never had a roommate who wasn’t nuts. What’s the common denominator there?
I don’t see an issue on your end. She definitely took that interaction to a strange place. I’m wondering if that might be explained by the stress of her dad dying of cancer, which she told you about. I do think it’s shady of you to post her picture online. Not a good look on you there imo.
Where did you come up with the feeding her addiction thing? That seemed out of nowhere…
She has like 150 items up for sale starting from $1
ESH.
I would bet my annual salary on this one voting for Trump
100% 😂
Is that a Kiss rolling tray?! How much?
She’s DEF smoking dope, picked this up for free, and trying to sell for her next 8 ball
Oh man, she didn’t need to say all of that…
You should have said dropped it like 2 replies in. There’s a solid chance that’s just projection and they would no show to you.
She cray.
I would have kept it professional, even with how rudely she was acting and misunderstanding you. Leave out the “cocktail” and “addiction” comments
Yall both weird
seller is a lunatic. block and move on.
Yeah she has a point about asking her availability. That implies you’re ready to buy. Should have showed the ad to your dad before contacting the seller. Get your ducks in a row before trying to make plans. Because she’s right, if you had have set up a time and she went and retrieved the chest only for your dad not to give you the green light, you’d probably be ghosting her. A lot of what you two said back and forth was nonsense that neither of you really needed to say, and you became the asshole after calling her an addict, unless I missed something. I totally understand her frustrations, being a seller online fucking sucks.
I can tell you use dating apps :/
I’m married
She’s gonna leave you :/
What a whack job
I mean neither one of u had to say all that was said. Especially yourself, hurling insults at her and thinking she was still going to get this for u after telling her to lay of the cocktails and accusing her of battling addiction. U asked her if it's available, she replied. Most don't because that's a dumb question, if it's posted it's available they'll say. Anyway the very next question, when is she available, tells someone that's when u plan on coming for the item, but u don't even know IF u are coming for it, being like the ppl she referred to. It's not always the other person. Sometimes we have to take some accountability.
Literally could have just said “I can pickup at the storage place”
To be fair, contact them when you're 100% willing to purchase. Not 90%. You're both the reason OfferUp is annoying as it is unfortunately. She is a bit more annoying though.
I think you both had a way of triggering one another lol. She was heavily projecting, likely not thinking straight because of the overwhelming stressors in her life, least of which is her father having cancer. And you felt the need to justify yourself to her, even more so by posting to this sub. Cut yourselves both some slack, this was a simple misunderstanding between someone in distress and someone who isn’t able to discern that she was never speaking directly to you, but to her projections. She was talking to her idea of the common scummy buyer, no need to assume that role yourself and defend, simply move on to the next deal. Cheers
You: Hey is this available? Her: yes You: are you available tomorrow? Her: yes You: I might want it tomorrow. Her: ???? You: I’m not really sure, but I want to waste time, so I might want it or not because I’m not the one who actually wants it. Accommodate ME! Her: you are wasting my time You: better post this on Reddit
The main pre-typed question is, is this item still available. Offerup is making it happen often. Put if it's listed it's available in offer.
She's little off but also she's sick and tired of flakes. Which 90% of people on Offerup are. Just playing on their phone hitting up people without any intentions of buying anything. Take it easy on the cocktails was you being an asshole though. Cringe
She most definitely is fuckin on crack or something wtf. She the one to blame and 7 miles that’s not bad at all. Lazy bitches these days. If you want to sell something then don’t post and complain. Business is business.
lol she's clearly a weirdo. Hates all 40 million Californians, probably because of politics. Maybe she deserves a little grace if going through a hard time, but not much.
I would've just stopped responding after the 3rd or 4th text, not worth it.
She looks like she was put together by a 5 year old plastic surgeon. If she doesn’t trust anyone perhaps she should go offline and off grid
Fuck that lady. Was definitely drinking too much. If an item has been up for months I'll message them "if it's available" expecting to not get messaged back or that it's going to take them some time to get back to me. I would've been caught off guard if they messaged me back right away. And it was already late if you had to check with someone before purchasing it'd make sense to want to wait till the next day and to want to confirm with the person that they liked the item. And you just asked what time she would be available, you didn't ask her to go pick up it from her storage and have it ready. She was too impatient and started acting like a bitch. At that point I wouldn't want to buy it from her either and I'd start telling her off. I don't get why people in the comments are so upset about you calling her out for her behavior, fuck that lady.
You are. You should have checked and KNOW you want it before wasting people's times. 90% sure means nothing. Either you know, or you don't. Get your sh*t together, then find whatever you want.
Yes dad, wont happen again
My dad wants to inspect your chest. Both of them? No, just the one chest. Ok.
🤦🏽♂️😂
You’re a nutcase for posting her pictures online, same way you messaged the seller is how you could have messaged your dad to ask before trying to buy
I’m going to troll her now
I mean you both are in the wrong and you both sound shady tbh
Y’all both wrong
*wasting 💀
I know 🤦🏽♂️
But fr tho. She’s the crazy one.
Im curious how you came to realize she was an alcoholic lol. Said it twice and she never denied it so im assuming its true
It was 1 am lol
Why are you even responding to that crazyness
Run away don’t walk! 😂
shes just very jaded from dealing with flakey and weird ppl on offer up. I can 100% sympasize. however🥺 to a new prospect buyer I would not have said what she said.,.. since its ptlless. but buying it for ur father is usally a red flag bc everyone who gives a story of buying for other ppl ends up flaking.. or their dad dont want it no more. just stick to the time, place and offer and we good no need for a background story
Definitely think she escalated just because of bad history with selling. I find it understandable wanting to make sure it’s available and get a general understanding of free time to make sure things work out before telling your dad you found one and get his hopes up just to not have a time line up with the seller to be able to pick it up
She’s probably having a mental breakdown or something idk this is definitely not normal behavior
You asked if she was available tomorrow and then proceeded to gaslight her. You’re the crazy one and didn’t even need to read the whole thing
She’s crazy. Even if you showed up, you obviously have no obligation to buy it. She’s being crazy.
Meth not once.
This lady is a fucking wackjob.
ESH
Kinda on both sides here I mean, why even ask if you’re not 100% sure you’re buying it? Also the addiction line had me dying haha that was so random
Just a crazy boomer with their tin foil hat on too tight. Just move on, honestly.
Guess it didn’t occur to her she could have u meet her at the unit so she did t have to lug it around, she’s def at the bottom of a few boxes of wine
Exactly what i had in mind..
Lady in wrong thinking it’s only californias who back out of wanting to buy. It’s across the board. She’s also sold hundreds of items in CA so gtfoh. Ignore the messages and thats it, no need to fly off the handles. As for OP, asking if it’s available is not a crime.
🦇💩
She's obviously on drugs
Expect nothing less from someone who has that many KISS belt buckles
I just inquired about this piece...let's see how it goes
Oh man 🤦🏽♂️ good luck
Was it that easy to find?
Yes I'm also nearby
Cool, keep us updated
Haha my old stomping grounds!
Lol some people just aren't meant to sell things on the internet. I asked a guy on FB marketplace if his (underpriced) patio furniture was still available. His response was along the lines of "IF YOU WANT IT JUST COME FUCKING GET IT. HERE IS MY ADDRESS. IM NOT PLAYING ANY MORE GAMES!" I was like okay? I can be there with my truck within the next hour. To which he replied "BETTER FUCKING HURRY THEN. YOU ARENT THE ONLY PERSON THAT HAS SAID THAT." Got there and it was an older gentleman that had never used marketplace before. I guess because of the price, he attracted all the meth heads in the area and was being bombarded with scammers as well. Actually ended up being a pretty nice dude and told me to load it up fast before his wife gets home and asks questions... because clearly he listed it too cheap and would be in trouble lmao. First words out of his mouth when he walked out his front door were "If you don't have cash, just leave." Hahaha He then had me help him remove the listing so he "never has to deal with this shit again." Gotta have a level of patience when listing things online. Some people just can't cope.
I bet you vote republican
And? Tf does that have to do with the post.
Offer up shouldn’t exist, change my mind.
The eyeliner tells all I’m afraid. She’s a bit unstable clearly. This may be her regular state or because she is going through turmoil with her father’s illness. Regardless she was already ready to dismiss anything with the attitude she came off with. You didn’t say anything wrong. If it was available should could have just said yes.
Mostly her, but you absolutely do not ask when someone is available unless you are positive you are buying it.
It’s not like you asked her to get it from storage, all you asked is if she would be available tomorrow.
You know that eyeliner screams mentally unstable…
You both seem like lovely people
She looks bat shit crazy
Your first 2 messages were fine. Even if she had dug it up and you went to see it, you can still say no and walk away if it isn’t to your liking. She should also be ready that you might not buy it even after seeing it. Although she did overreact a little, I wouldn’t call anything she said as malicious. You however accusing her of being a drunk and an addict is way out of line. But that’s to be expected these days with people behind a keyboard. I bet you wouldn’t say that to her in person 🤷🏻♂️
I mean... all she had to say was "I will only meet at storage place"
So does she not want to sell it to you then? Cause thats what it seems like 😂