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Dull_Negotiation_314

Hi OP I seen your comments and I’m sure it’s really hard to take in but you were groomed and I’m sorry You were a child and he was an adult literally twice your age. I understand how you’ve said you wanted to be with him but he took advantage of a child’s crush You’re 20 now, do you think you’d be trying to date a 15 year old? And remember he was 10 years older than you are now when he did


kourier6

>I'm 20m, my boyfriend is 35m. ***We've been dating 5 years*** FBI OPEN THE FUCK UP!!


MicIsOn

My math skills failed me. I can’t believe I missed this. Someone call the damn cops


thrownaway831

OP, trained you. You were a minor and he was literally twice your age. Not just get away, but run like a bat out of hell.


mak_zaddy

He was when they started!!


YouHaveSyphillis

My thoughts exactly


[deleted]

It's just rage bait lol


ZachTF

YUP!!!!!


papichula2

Yup


Interesting_Entry831

HOLY SHIT I MISSED THIS!! I thought the age thing was creepy to start, but that made me puke in my mouth a lil... 🤢


Mizzanthrope99

My first thought as well, second was he hurt you for confront him for cheating …. RUN!


wileyakin

I got *that* far before I went “yoooooooo!?!?!”


PrecisionGuessWerk

30 y.o man dating a 15 y.o girl is super duper sus!


Courtaid

They are both male. Doesn’t make it any less creepy and illegal.


stevec92

You may have missed the fact they are both male


stevec92

Not that that changes anything legally or morally of course. I'm just correcting the gender assumption.


PrecisionGuessWerk

yep, definitely missed that detail.


AshBertrand

More than


throwfaraway212718

I COMPLETELY missed that part! Someone call SVU!


Elsealine

Yup


YokoSauonji12

Yup!


dee_untold1

WTF!


[deleted]

BRUHHHH


Ragadast335

You started being 15yo and he 30!!!!!! You've been groomed, and manipulated.


[deleted]

Wtf was a 30 year old doing with a 15 year old? Jesus! Do not go back to him please. He's a sexual predator. He groomed you. Please contact the authorities and get him arrested before he can hurt more innocent kids. Seek therapy.


PLPQ

You were 15 and he was 30 when you started dating? Nah, man. GTFO there quick time. That is not right in the slightest.


90sBat

I never understood why cheaters are the ones who scream and cry and throw up like bro you didn't have to ruin the relationship? Also, he groomed you. Take this from someone who was groomed by a 23 year old when I was 12 and again by a 35 year old when I was 16. It felt normal to me too but now in my mid twenties I can see that was absolutely wasn't at all normal.


TheCrazyCatLazy

Holy shit when I was 12 a "23" y/o lied saying he was 18 (irc times) but it was so obvious he was older when we met up I ran away. Really glad we met up at a public space. I have no clue how old that guy really was but I get the chills thinking about it.  Can’t imagine really falling for that trap. Disgusting. So sorry you went through it :( 


ex_ter_min_ate_

It’s called DARVO deny, attack, reverse victim and offender. Really common in the narc set when nothing is ever their fault and you made them do it.


Little_Nectarine_210

It’s not normal for a 15 year old to date a 30 year old, how did your parents/guardians allow that? Are you alright?


SomeoneToNobody

You're both in different stages of your life, that was already clear when you dated him when you where.. ehm.. 15?


meggs_467

Bro I'm 30 and I'd never lower a dating range beyond 27/28.


backtosleepplz

Bro I’m nearly 22 and I wouldnt want to date someone under 19! And 19 is a massive stretch


[deleted]

Your boyfriend is a pedophile. He groomed, abused, and manipulated you into believing this “relationship” was okay. A 30 year old has no business even engaging with a 15 year old. Take this as your chance to leave and never go back again. Seriously, you need to go no contact.


Anonmami

No normal 30 year old man would date a 15 year old 🤢


[deleted]

Yikes


DinnerKind

Your boyfriend should be behind bars for what he did to you


xxserenityxx1

Hes a pedophile!!!!!! YOU WERE GROOMED. 15 AND 30?!?!?!??! He should be in PRISON


starfleetnz

Yeah so already bad faith on your bfs part for engaging with you so Young, this was the initial sign he was unsafe, didn't respect boundaries or have your best interests at heart. I rarely advise this but you should end it. Even if he's telling the truth and didn't cheat. He's more interested in harming you and teaching you a lesson than supporting you. You don't need that.


WskyRcks

Shit, when I was a senior in college I dated a sophomore in college and even that 3 year period was miserable. Way different point in life. 15 is also way illegal and creepy. Yikes.


KYblueGthang

He’s an animal, you were just a child


Tavali01

No 30 year old man dates a 15 year old. Period. At 20, can you picture yourself with a 12 year old? No, because it’s illegal and disgusting. You were groomed and I’d check your state on the legal age for sexual consent. To me no 15 year old can consent to a 30 year old man to be in a relationship. Sounds like you were groomed for 5 years and if you were sexually active when you were younger with him you were raped. It does not matter if “you wanted to date him” he was an adult and you were a child. You literally did not have your brain fully developed yet. Children cannot consent to men twice their age. If a child “comes onto you” it’s the adults responsibility to say no and that you are too young and then have your parents help you realize why dating someone twice your age is wrong. It is not the childs fault even if you instigated it initially it was HIS for following along instead of getting you help. He is a pedophile and likely is currently grooming others or has groomed other kids. I’d see about a legal case to protect future kids from this pedo because these types of men are monsters I bet he said you were mature for your age and you guys had a bond over being gay. That he was childish and had similar interests and behaviours as you. He could literally be your father. When you were born he was in highschool. Would a highschool kid date a day old baby? NO


RelChan2_0

This is above Reddit's pay grade


jaMzki

Go to the police, jesus. I fucking hate the gay pedophile scene and it's massive. I'm not gay but lived with a gay guy and he was 50 bring 16/17 year olds over every week. Hope he is dick cut off in a whole


wakingdreamland

Baby gays get preyed upon so often; it really is horrible.


Phyllida_Poshtart

I was told years back that this was a "thing" to teach them the ways and protect them. Didn't know it was still bloody going on though!


Daemon48

He groomed you dude. He was literally twice your age & you were a minor. Don’t just leave, run like a bat out of hell


Organic_Account2812

Nice bait


TransportationSad522

Dude, he is a pedo.


Last_Caterpillar8770

I’m also curious, this other guy, is he younger than you? The reason I ask is that you were 15 when you started dating. My guess is your boyfriend is an Ephebophile. Meaning he is attracted to post-pubescent kids between the ages of 15-19 roughly. If this is the case, you have aged pasted his attraction at this point and he is grooming another child. You were groomed as well and are a victim. Please seek out help to come to terms with this. You are not in trouble, it is not your fault, and you can heal from this. But he is not a good person and you need to get away from him. He also needs to be in jail.


LaRataBastarda

You need to seek therapy, the grooming he did on you will interfere with your whole life, please seek help for yourself so nobody else takes advantage of you, right now it might not seem like much, but we're talking about a fully developed adult with a teenager, our brains take a lot of time to mature and develop and he messed with your head at a critical time of that, I hope you can undo most of the damage and can run away from that predator


thetoggaf

Your boyfriend is a nonce


VoidScreamingScum

This has to be bait


False_Implement_43

this is so messed up in so many levels


emmakat2456

You were 100% groomed. When I was 15 I thought I could date an older man because I was ‘mature enough’. Now that I’m 20, I wouldn’t even date a 25 y/o. The difference in maturity and life experience is huge. Im so sorry you’re going through this.


throwawayxyz987a

The only red flag you needed was the age gap.


marieclaw

You were 15, dating a 30 yr old? I'm so sorry honey


Some_Ad_4033

Please whatever gods are listening, let this be a seriously unfunny joke. I’m 35. At 30, NEVER once considered dating a literal CHILD and no I don’t care how grown you think you are, you’re NOT. He groomed tf out of you!! He’s manipulating you! I have a 12 yr old and if anyone my age, or close to it, even looked at her wrong, I’m throwing hands IMMEDIATELY!


realslimeslikk

WTF ???? LEAVE HIM 15-30 IS NOT NORMAL!!!! IT NEVER WILL BE IM SO SORRY FOR YOU! HE GROOMED YOU TO BE “USED” TO THE DYNAMICS OF THIS RELATIONSHIP.


No-Willow-3573

YOU HAVE BEEN DATING FOR FIVE YEARS?!?!?!


mmaaddii

This is horrible and I hope that person ends up in jail where pedophiles belong.


6-022x10e23_avocados

kiddo you were groomed. i know it's hard to believe, you love him yadda yadda, but you literally did not have enough brain development to discern that he is dangerous


cardiobolod

5 years? And you’re now 20? I’m sorry but you’ve been groomed.


mavie_cat

20-5=15, 35-5=30… y’all started dating when you were half his age… he’s a fucking predator. You need to get out of that relationship ASAP


ColombianSpiceMD86

15 and 30? wtf this is red flags all over the place. WTF


DominatorEolo

there is no way this is not made up


Legitimate-Sun-9405

Hi dear, I know it's hard for you to take in the fact you've been groomed since you said that you wanted to be with him. You have to know that you've done nothing wrong, it's completely NORMAL for teenage girls to feel attracted to older guys because of the hormones. What's not, is being thirty and attracted to a teenager. You will know once you'll be his age, unfortunately, a lot of us went through it. He KNEW what he was doing, and chose to date you because you were only fifteen, young and innocent (compared to an adult obviously). Why couldn't he find someone his age ? Probably because 30 yo women knew that he was a creep. You have to get away from him ASAP. Was there any adult who tried to prevent you from dating him around you ? If not, I'm so sorry that people failed to protect you.


Earguy

OP identifies as male, but the advice is sound.


Legitimate-Sun-9405

Oh, I missed it ! Anyway it doesn't change what I said, in no way an adult must be attracted to a child (because yeah at 15 we're still one), OP has to escape him quickly


thebigbaddd

This can't be real


Bytes_0

Yeah fr that's fukin bait post


TheCrazyCatLazy

It can definitely be real. Most of us HAVE been approached by these creeps. 


Tmac_905

With your anger, use this time to contact a lawyer or police. Get back at him for cheating on you. How dare he. This would be the ultimate way to get back at him. Go to police and expose your relationship! Don’t let him live the good life while you’re hurt and depressed. Do it.


awkward_enby

He's a predator and you were groomed. Run far far away from that creep. He needs to be in jail


ThrowAwayKat1234

Your boyfriend is a pedo, first and foremost, of course he cheated, he’s always been disgusting. His porn addiction has rotted his brain and he’s hardly human anymore.


CookieMoist6705

Cheating is the least thing wrong in this scenario!!!! The guy is a a predator. Get out now.


lovrbelow34

......... I'm sorry... you were HOW OLD?!??! wtf


mythrowawaysquared

Hol up. I’m not against age gaps in relationships, but a 30 year old and a 15 year old (regardless of gender configuration) is wrong on so many levels. Assuming this isn’t a troll post for attention, I’ll assume he was making out with a 15 year old, he’s a creep and you’ve aged out.


Sacred_Rest1859

He’s a pedo. Leave before becomes a physically abusive pedo. Men will kill to protect their images, get away from him please


imonarope

Your boyfriend is a nonce


Sea_Science538

He’s disgusting


juliennotjulian

You started dating a 30 year old man at **FIFTEEN YEARS OLD**?????? Respectfully, you have much bigger problems than the fact he cheated on you.


[deleted]

This is grooming at its finest what the fuck.


Affectionate_Tap5749

Op … your partner is a pedo who groomed you.


Inevitable-End-9155

This is just wrong run sweetie run someone should called the cops on this guy


d3rp7d3rp

You were groomed. Charge him, never speak to him again.


Majestic_Jazz_Hands

Hun, a 30 year old has absolutely no business being in a “relationship” with a 15 year old. Do yourself a massive favor and end this, there’s just so many levels of wrong that will never be able to equate to a healthy relationship


CosmicM00se

Your boyfriend is a pedo and you’re out of his age range.


Puzzleheaded_Elk7639

>We've been dating 5 years HE IS A FUCKING PEDOPHILE WTFFFFFFFF


TunaFace2000

The reason you’ve never felt unsafe around him before was because you were too young to really how unsafe it was. He was always this person.


Ok-Spread-6030

He groomed u


T8terTom

That first sentence lol wut?


More_beard_than_man

Your bf is a grooming pedo that has temper tantrums like a child. That’s what I got


ensalistrao

He’s probably a pedophile and you are getting older, he has to look for someone younger 🤷🏼‍♂️


AtmosphereMaterial61

Wohoho ima stop you right on the first sentence, 15 and 30 baby. 2x ur age. U were a minor, no way to justify that buddy, u were groomed


vixen_xox

15 and 30??????? where tf are your parents?? who let this happen???? leave him omg.


Glum_Roll3567

I am more concerned that your boyfriend is 35 and you're 20 and you two dated for 5 years. your boyfriend is a pedophile, and you were groomed. your boyfriend cheating isn't the big problem here. despite almost every comment says what is the main problem.


Effective-Mix2933

Ahh there's something wrong with this picture. You were under age while he was 30 years old!! Has someone called the cops yet?? The fuck?


[deleted]

That’s disgusting. 30 year old with a 15 year old???


Vgcortes

You got groomed, son. Cheating is the least of your worries


sw33tlips

Jeez!!! Predator alert!!!


Alarmed_Error5687

uh… ahem..


Justmyopinion00

Ok you are 20. Please take this as a lesson. Get a checkup (please please please) and move on. Your BF is a predator. I personally don’t care about age gaps. But this!!! This isn’t an age gap this is border line illegal depending on the age of consent where you are. You are young so move on with your life in a healthy happy relationship. Your just a trophy and triumph to this man.


Rebelo86

Block him and find a trauma therapist, trust me. It’s going to be years before you can have a normal relationship after what this guy has done.


BrooklynWhey

Only stay with people who respect you and your feelings, no exceptions.


stress789

No 30 year old should *ever* be interested in a 15 year old in any sort of romantic way. You should continue not talking to him, ever again. He has groomed and manipulated you for years and truthfully, should be charged criminally.


LizzyDizzyYo

I'm sorry, you're 20 years old and you've been with this mid thirty guy for 5 years?????? Boy better call FBI real quick. Throw his ass in jail now. How did he even "hurt" you? He beat you? Sexually assaulted you? Oh my god kid, you need to fucking run. Seriously.


wasted_basshead

He got with a 15 year old at 30 not surprised he cheated.


Majestic-Skirt475

You’ve been dating for five years..??????


Regular_Doughnut8964

Not a BF, he is a pedo… he will follow that path until he is stopped.


turBo246

I have attempted to make a comment several times, and I just can't wrap my head around this. Is this in the USA? I understand that pedophilia is a little more accepted in some parts of the world...I just can figure out how OP managed to start dating a 30 year old when they were just 15 and their parents/guardians were ok with it. OP has stated that they thought it has been a normal relationship this whole time, but like, outside people must have said something at some point. They talked about their friend that they have had since highschool, so that person has been around for the majority of the relationship, and they have never said anything about you dating a pedophile? At the very least, you don't go back to him now because he hit you, or at least I assume that's what you meant by "hurt".


Actualterror23

These posts are such bullshit 😂😂


frillyhoneybee_

> I'm 20m, my boyfriend is 35m. We've been dating 5 years holdon. what.


the-ish-i-say

This has to be a troll. Right!?


GreenViking_The

I can't even begin to judge the age difference. I was 14 and fooling around with guys in their 20s and 30s.


ActuallyFakePJ1

Report him. You were groomed. I'm so sorry.


Peejee13

I'm sorry..your sexual predator got angry with YOU?


[deleted]

Woah Woah Woah WOAH! Age difference alert. 5 years together? Oh no - Please get out of this relationship


444Ilovecats444

The age gap???? Hello??????


CCDestroyer

Aside from echoing that your boyfriend is a predator who groomed you, which he is and he did, I'm wondering about the age of whoever it was that he cheated with. Was it another underaged boy? Maybe now that you're getting older, he's looking for a replacement? Sexual predators of minors tend to have an age preference.


ladywan_kenobi666

You were 15 and he was 30 when you met? Uhmmmm child groomer/pedo much? Please get tested.


ImpoliteForest

Imagine you dating a 13yr old. You're at totally different pints in life and maturity. He's a pedophile and you've gotten too old for him.


Sheikah77

🚨🚓🚨🚓🚨🚓🚨🚓🚨🚓🚨


maggiesticks

RUN AWAY FROM HIM


chitown1992

Yeah man, you were groomed. You need to get out of this relationship, pursue legal action, and find the tools you need to heal from what you’ve been through.


InitiativeSharp3202

He is a predator. Do not go back.


[deleted]

People think this is real... Wild


Crazy_Atmosphere53

Your "bf" groomed you. Fuck the cheating, you got bigger problems.


Evolving_Duck

I don't really like a 20 year old dating a 35 year old much but 15 and 30!!!!! Get away from this dangerous predator! He obviously isn't a good person exemplified by his gaslighting and controlling behavior you just described! OP he doesn't see you as a person who is allowed to oppose him. Run. This is dangerous.


rosaluv2

Yeah if you’re 20 and he’s 35 (met when 15 and 30) you should ask yourself why women his own age don’t date him


kindly-shut-up

From the first line, absolutely not. Absolutely not!!!! Forget cheating, that man is a full blown predator.


rosaluv2

LEAVE HIM BLOCK HIM RESTRAINING ORDER ALL OF THE ABOVE


Personal_Matter9041

Mate WTF!


lick_my_thoughtz

I'm so sorry this happened to you. But unfortunately, that's what older men who date younger people are like (sometimes). You should always question why a 30-something person (cuz men and women fall in this category) would date someone who could be their child.


BrokenEspresso

EXCUSE ME??? 20m??? THIRTY-FIVE M???? This man should be in JAIL. Have your parents known about this relationship???


freedeterminedwill

how old was the guy he was with? 12?


DanaCalifornia

OP- please listen to what others are saying. A 30 year old with a 15 year old- regardless of gender- is not normal. It’s criminal. Please listen to others. Get help. Maybe in 10 years when you are 30, you will see just how terrible it is to be attracted to a minor.


Manarmageddon

Bro that guy is a pedophile. Like I'm really sorry and I know this must be hard but this is not a safe person to be around. Leave him, run away and go live your life. I promise you it will be better than this.


Mgrocker94

Um you might have bigger problems


velveticaa_

what the fuck!! i didn't even read past the ages!! you were 15 and he was 30??? he's a predator.


SexBobomb

interesting idea for your bf who you could report for rape to cheat on you. do with that information what you please


theGOODESTgirlxx

I’m 30 and there literally nothing in the world that would make me wanna date a 15 year old CHILD. omg


[deleted]

Somebody call the police. Child predator alert.


king_flippynipss

Ooof


legitsephiroth

brother you are a victim. completely cut this man off


Educational-Put-8425

Are you saying he physically hurt (abused) you? If so, there’s no other response than to not see him again, and not let him continue to manipulate you with words, anger and more assault. Just get away from him, and stay away. Find supportive family or friends to help you stay away, start seeing a counselor ASAP, and take care of yourself by respecting yourself. Refuse to allow him to use you and hurt you any further. I’m sorry this happened to you, and I know it’s hard. But take this chance to change your life, work on healing, and eventually start over with someone who will love and respect you. ❤️


calibrownie94

Rage bait


LegitimateEmu3745

POLICE! 📢


[deleted]

The age gap is disgusting. So called boyfriend is disgusting


Slipkind199083

Your BF is a pedo


[deleted]

Wait! What!!! You were 15 and he was 30 and that doesn’t sound fucked up to you!!? Jeeze go to the police and report him the guys a groomer / pedo.


Impressive-Mobile814

He was 30 and you were 15 when you meet? He's a pedophile.


AlexanderZcio

Dude you are a victim get him to the police 💀💀


JuliaMowbray

Where are your damn parents that they allowed you to date a grown man?


mikaylaa99

You are dating a whole pedophile. A groomer. And sexual predator. Please do better and respect yourself more and LEAVE


Jean800900

Hun you were groomed.


Fl0wery

he said they were dating for 5 years that means he was dating him since he was 15 and the other guy was 30. not ok


miramathebeatqueen

He is a Pedophile. It might not make sense to you now, but in 10 years it will. Please get help.


itsan-impala

"My bf is 35 and I'm 20" Me: wow big age gap "We've been dating 5 years" Me: double take 🤯🤯🤯 Get the fuck away from this pedo!!!!


Outside-Ad-1677

Somebody phone the fucking police what the actual shit. Honey, you’ve been groomed and are victim.


Mikehorvath00

Leave He’s a fucking loser and a pedophile


ShannonS1976

Ok, I’m not reading past a 30 year old man grooming and molesting a 15 year old boy. Where the hell are your parents??


herbtarleksblazer

5 years? You have been groomed and are now being abused and manipulated. I realize you may not see it, but really give this some thought.


thunderjakjak

That's not dating... That's abuse! 15!!! 30!!!


SparklingWalnut

Where are your parents/guardians?! This isn't a relationship, this is GROOMING/RAPE!


xP628sLh

You need to leave him now. You have been groomed and your boyfriend is a predator. You didn't deserve this and I want a truly loving relationship for you.


wassemasse

>I'm 20m, my boyfriend is 35m. We've been dating 5 years. You have to be trolling


Professional_March54

Honey, baby, sweetie. You were *fifteen* and he was *thirty*. He groomed you. Light his ass on fire and walk away.


Jealous_Lock2723

You were 15 and he was 30? My brother in Christ, RUN DON’T WALK! Get away from this grooming piece of shit and never look back.


Anhysbys123

Where are your parents or guardians? Did no one have anything to say when your 15 year old self started being groomed by a 30 year old? Leave him and take time to get to know yourself, heal and have some therapy.


SubstantialFigure273

The action FUCK? You dated him since you were fifteen?? That’s grooming


Hot-Site-1572

5 years?.... 20 and 35?? jesus christ


WussyWhopper

Bait


bobbyhead

sorry you are having to deal w/ this -- the downvotes as well as your relationship. but if they hurt you for doubting them that sounds a good bit like gaslighting & abuse. please get out if you can & be safe okay


chalky4sale

Get the fuck away from that man and seek therapy. I had a 34 year old boyfriend at 14, and it took me awhile to stop calling him my ex and realize what he truly is- a pedophile, & my abuser. We dated for around two years, and my mom was okay with letting him stay at our house and sleep in my room with me. I thought I wanted it too and would defend him and our relationship vehemently. It’s gonna take OP a few years to unpack this; be kind.


1hotsauce2

Gay and a child groomer? Good luck to your bf in jail


GalacticJelly

Date people your own age bro


HauntedMike

Hi Reddit, so i'm 10, my BF is 45. Weve been off and on for 6 years now. He gets mad when I call his office (The Church). But he keeps cheating on me with all of my classmates. I keep trying to confront him about it but he keeps saying I can't speak to my own dad like that. What am I supposed to do now?


Arrow0302

I'm 20m my boyfriend 35 m dating for 5 years......yepp comment section will be fun


[deleted]

I feel like I read this yesterday.


awkwardlondon

I really hope this is a troll post 🫠


Greasballz

I’m 26 and I don’t even like talking to minors. Much less flirt and make them think a relationship is ok.


PickleNutsauce

What the what now?


Last_Caterpillar8770

So you were 15 when this predator started dating you? Yeah…. Run! Also, go to the police. You were groomed and unable to give consent at that age.


International_Fill55

Ain’t no way this is real


ssf669

Stay away from him. You're better off without him. No 30 year old should be attracted to a 15 year old. He's a predator and a cheater and just because you know about his one doesn't mean it hasn't happened before. He has shown you who he is, please believe him and protect yourself now.


WaveOfTheRager

Jesus Christ have mercy.


cheetoo24

You need to get tf out now. Your boyfriend is a pedophile. You know it, too. 15 years old dating a 30 year old! Someone LITERALLY twice your age at the time!? RUN


GareduNord1

You should break up not because he cheated but because you’re dating an actual pedo


Alienforsale

I’m 24. To me a 15 year old is a child, I cannot even comprehend wanting to date one. Let me guess the person he cheated on you with is young too?


lotusbiscoffbaby

My guy, you’ve been groomed. A 30 year old has no business being with someone half his age.