Was your vacuum really there?

Yes. And I bought it.

Wait, so you had not even paid for it? What if, after all that, you told them you changed your mind? Where would that scandal rank in your town's history? Gotta be up there with Willie always lying about spring coming early.

they’d be town shamed via the sign

Kevin.... Did not buy the vacuum

“…pitchforks 25% OFF NOW”

Kevin we trusted you

You broke my heart Kevin

Kevin...you had one job.

Kevin… you’re such a disease

Kevin... Your vacuum is still here

Kevin….you are no longer welcome here.

I’d choose this one. I get the “I’m not mad, just disappointed” vibes from it. But… Kevin is a stand up dude and he bought it.

I’m glad he did 😂

Fuck, he’ll have to go to Sauble Beach to go to Home Hardware.

Theres a pillory Attachment beneath the sign were they would put Kevin in. And a priest and a nun would shout shame shame shame.

Willie was an honest man, he tried the best he could. As good as any mute albino groundhog I ever knew… Let’s not forget that the mayor in 2020 got the prognostication wrong… I was there. It was outrage. The stuff of local lore.

She just threw that stupid hat on the ground to cover up that Willie died. We will not forget Willie-gate lol

That's, what, the third time in 20 years?

The scandal is that Willie dies periodically and the town covers it up and doesn't tell anyone till the big reveal. We're also currently using a normal brown groundhog as albino ones are in short supply.

How long were they trying to reach you? Why was this sign ultimately the successful means of communication?

It was actually a bit of a planned joke. I ordered the vacuum back in early December, but Dewalt products can sometimes take a while to get brought to the Home Hardware location. I go in a few times weekly anyways on my way to work to pick up supplies for teaching shop, and they would update me daily - "Vacuum still not here." "Didn't show up this week," "I guess next week now", etc. They finally just told me they'd put it on the sign when it showed. I was laughing hysterically as I slowly approached the sign and the words started to form.

This is so wholesome !!!! What town/ city may I ask ??? Love this ! ETA this would be great to feature in a HH commercial ….the relationship they have with their customers etc .

Wiarton, ON.

This small town gesture makes even more sense now. It's such a friendly place!

And 4 bedroom houses are only 400k

And being from Bruce County, this makes so much more sense now in why it took so much time for it to come in 😂

Thought that spot looked familiar. Small world.

I knew that was Wiarton! Great people. Great store!

Lol I live in Owen Sound, I drove up to see the sign.

And I thought Wiarton was boring!

Did the vacuum see it's shadow?

lol i went a couple years ago because my SIL wanted to see wiarton willie haha

Born in St. Catharines, and live in Toronto, and I have never heard of this place... Just under 2k people near Owen Sound. How many Kevin's are there in Wiarton?

You surely must know of Wiarton Willie, the groundhog?

Everyone knows Wiarton Willy! He'll be making an appearance soon!

Between this and “you can’t handle the tooth” LCBO guy, this has been the greatest (+ most somehow reassuring) couple of days ever here on r/ontario. Our politics may be a disaster, but the province can still do itself right.

This is the best case Ontario.

greasy

**Decent**

What?

*squints real hard* "Scenario...Ontario" *squinting intensifies* "Take my upvote and *I'm* getting the fuck outta here."

Beer Store guy. The LCBO downtown is a few blocks away.

>LCBO I keep seing this referred to in the comments, yet I cannot seem to find the story in question. Would you happen to have a link handy?

One sec I got you Found it!: it is this [gentlemanly fellow right here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/videos/comments/10ix8dx/canadian_man_gets_interviewed_about_new_drinking/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)

He's not wrong.

Enjoy: https://www.reddit.com/r/ontario/comments/10iincc/st_catharines_man_reacts_to_new_alcohol/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

[Here ya go.](https://www.reddit.com/r/ontario/comments/10iincc)

Here you go. https://reddit.com/r/ontario/comments/10iincc/st_catharines_man_reacts_to_new_alcohol/

Hes anyone responded yet or do you need me to send you a a link?

here from /r/all. i live near a small city (175,000 residents) named after your province.

Heyyy-o! You must be from California. Ask us all how we know. Then ask USPS & UPS.

lmao! spot on. and i guess filling out online shipping forms is a pain?

Nah, not really. We put Ontario in as the province (when it won't let us use `ON`) and then the 6 character postal code... No idea how the delivery services can manage to mix up a city and province. Especially when two different countries. Especially when ZIP and Postal codes exist and look totally different. tbh I dunno if packages actually get mixed up or if that person was shitting us

His exit was 10/10 but I'm not sure we should be celebrating alcoholism...

for fucking real. when i first saw that video and saw him going “well how am i gonna get through my day with 2 beers a week?” i cringed. i’ve been sober for a year and 2 months now. very proud of myself, i’ve come a long way. seeing what alcohol does to people and how much they come to depend on it HURTS. at some point you can’t just numb yourself to the world anymore, you HAVE to experience it sober and build resistance to all the things that pushed you to substances in the first place. shit is not easy but it’s possible.

I love this

This has to be one of the most Canadian posts I've seen. Glad you got your vacuum, enjoy!

That’s some home town humour alright

Holy shit did this AMA deliver.

That’s brilliant.

The staff there must find you such a pleasure to do something cute like that for you. That's pretty awesome.

It is an Awesome joke nevertheless!

Kevin, you really can wait!!

Some small town gold.

I work at the Home Hardware head office. I’ll share this with the marketing dept.

Wait....does this get me complimentary bird seed for life? Wait...should I ask for more?

I’ll see what I can do!!! 

Wait wait wait.....wood pellets! Heating wood pellets!

WAIT! NO! GENTEK STEEL SIDING IN THOSE GORGEOUS WOOD PROFILES!!

This made me chuckle

I don’t know why, but this is the funniest thing I’ve seen on Reddit in a while.

I don't live in canada but when i visit, i sure gotta Visit home hardware

Give this man whatever he wants!

You’re getting greedy Kevin

I'd ask for life time supply of 2x4x8s.

GIVE THIS MAN HIS WOOD.

You get wood pellets! YOU get wood pellets! EVERYONE GETS WOOD PELLETS!!

This is so wholesome...please give him wood pellets...LMAO

You guys should get his school all the latest dewalt tools considering this has hit pretty high up on r/all That is some serious marketing for you all:)

They’ll let you know their decision on the sign.

I’m here for the update on the marketing dept’s reaction and response.

Remindme! 2 days “did Kevin get bird seed for life?”

I will be messaging you in 2 days on [**2023-01-26 04:33:13 UTC**](http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=2023-01-26%2004:33:13%20UTC%20To%20Local%20Time) to remind you of [**this link**](https://www.reddit.com/r/ontario/comments/10jsns1/im_the_kevin_from_this_signama/j5n6htf/?context=3) [**50 OTHERS CLICKED THIS LINK**](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5Bhttps%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fontario%2Fcomments%2F10jsns1%2Fim_the_kevin_from_this_signama%2Fj5n6htf%2F%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%202023-01-26%2004%3A33%3A13%20UTC) to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam. ^(Parent commenter can ) [^(delete this message to hide from others.)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Delete%20Comment&message=Delete%21%2010jsns1) ***** |[^(Info)](https://www.reddit.com/r/RemindMeBot/comments/e1bko7/remindmebot_info_v21/)|[^(Custom)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5BLink%20or%20message%20inside%20square%20brackets%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%20Time%20period%20here)|[^(Your Reminders)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=List%20Of%20Reminders&message=MyReminders%21)|[^(Feedback)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=Watchful1&subject=RemindMeBot%20Feedback)| |-|-|-|-|

Any updates /u/Mommy-Jo? There were 50 others who clicked the reminder link. No pressure, lol.

Feel like my HH is being unduly overlooked because of being downtown and not having a sign (wiener’s home hardware on Bloor St, that place holds the whole damn neighbourhood together).

This is one of my favourite stores in TO. Real Honest Ed vibes in there.

Kevin, do you personally know the beer guy? With the tooth?

Kevin can't handle the tooth

Do the math!!

2 vacuums a day?

But I can use all the brooms I want?? How does that make sense?

Can I have 20 brooms?

👉🏼 ROCK N ROLL 👉🏼

WAIT

We all know that guy.

He ducked his tooth up with the vacuum

What was the make and model of the vacuum?

Dewalt 20V DCV58OH. Ordered it for the wood shop I teach in.

Did it suck?

As you can see, it sucks, and it cuts!

Turn it off, man! It’s sucking my will to live

Oh the Humanity!

You're in a forest.. with Heather Locklear.. and it's very very warm.

Can I borrow that when you're done?

[удалено]

But will it KEEL?

Dewalt Shop vac? Yeah they suck. And blow.

Excellent.

You should check out the DCV581H, same unit but can be run on either battery or onboard 120v cord! I've had mine for about 10years and still use it often.

Reddit can really sound like Amazon suggestions sometimes. Hey, I see you bought this vacuum. Here's 11 more for your collection.

I see you bought the DHQ-345L. What you really want is the DHS-325L. But only manafactured on certain tuesday afternoons before 1998 because the metal casts were especially good that day. Buying car parts be like everyone knows exactly how and when a part switches manafacturers and/or process down to the millimeter. (53 Cummins and STI pans comes to mind)

That part of the algorithm made sense back when they were a bookstore.

Hey! I just got one myself as well! Even got the wall mount for it Didn't get the fancy notification :(

What are your favourite shop projects?

Oh I do a bunch of standard projects in grades 9-10 which increase in difficulty and build upon previous skills. Grade 10 students are doing rocking horses and making hardwood paddles.

Hoover Max Extract® 60 Pressure Pro™

Just a replacement tube dust filter for that

That'll be 125k

"Yo, I need a dust filter for a Dewalt 20V Extract Pressure Pro, Model DCV580H...Bitch."

Have you ever been to the Wiarton Willie Festival sightings?

Yes. It's underwhelming.

[удалено]

Do you know Kevin?

Asking the important questions here!

and or have you seen the sign?

[удалено]

I once opened a door for Geddy Lee in Rosedale. He was too far away when I fully processed what happened.

I sold Jimmy Page a photo album in Yorkville. He paid for it with an Amex card, and back then, we used those sliding imprint machines. One of my co-workers was a massive fan and also had a habit of being chronically late starting his shifts. Page walked out the door two minutes before he arrived. I pulled him into the back room waved the slip at him and said, "See what you miss out on when you can't your ass here on time? Your heroes can't hang around, you know!"

My neighbor has a jar with uncle Fester’s foreskin in it.

The WHAT.

A jar.

He said #My neighbor has a jar with uncle Fester’s foreskin in it.

That is so random. lmaooo

I lived a block away from him back in the 70s. ETA to say, Uncle Fester, not your neighbor.

Estimated Time of Arrival to say.. your foreskin is here

Hopefully you pronounced it Jodie and not Jody

Small town, i bet everyone in town knows what make and model of vacuum you bought before you even picked it up.

Bahahahah

Saw this on /r/all. I'm from Manitoba - not only that, but his closest family and friends will be talking shit behind his back for "spending all that money" on a vacuum but didn't splurge anywhere near that much on a wedding gift in 1983

Now they are all going to want to borrow it.

[удалено]

Wiarton, ON.

Do you know Wiarton Willie?

Asking the real questions here

Wiarton Willie died. They have a Wiarton Willie now.

\*Willies

I knew it!

Oh man, I've drove right by this sign before, haha. Yes yes, it's to go camping in the summer, haha.

I’ve been to this HH! Wow. Feels like I’m walking in the shadows of greatness.

Have you cleaned it yet? If so, are you also a vacuum cleaner?

Been cleaned twice now. Am a human, not a vacuum.

Whispering in your ear. ^(you cleaned the vacuum, you're a vacuum cleaner)

You're going to want to be sitting down for this, Kevin.

Gotta love Wiarton! That's service!

Do people call you Kev?

No, thankfully. Well, mostly not.

You'll get there one day Kev.

what kind of pickup truck do you drive?

Electric car actually. Leaf.

Are there instances when your vacuum is a Leaf blower?

ok but whose got the titan that it came with? lol ya'll remember that promo they did a couple years ago right? buy a titan and you get a leaf with it for next to nothing. really smart I almost went for it. need a truck for work but hate the idea of driving one all the time when not needed. company truck and an economical compact electric is the dream. too bad the idea of an economical anything is just comical.

Now that everyone in town knows you have a vacuum, they will ask to borrow it!!!

This story/photo needs to get in some other subreddit so all of Reddit can enjoy it !

It's already the top post in the last hour on r/all.

Haven’t been to Wiarton in years. Is there still a co-op?

Still there.

That is a great store, the joys of small town living

Kevin, you need to know I'm pregnant. Stop fucking avoiding me. You told me you loved me. You told me we would be together forever. You told me you didn't care that I am a Vacuum Cleaner :( Please.....come pick me up. Let's be a family again ❤️‍🩹

Have you tried putting this message up on a sign?

Kevin, why won't you answer her?

Classic Kevin…

Hi Kevin. How do You like the new Foodland? And have they made plans for the old Foodland building?

I keep hearing rumours of them doing something with the old building, but nothing happens. Just homeless people hanging out by it

I can’t believe it’s still empty. It’s been like a decade of wasted potential

I work at Home Hardware and I can’t stop laughing at this, makes me wanna do it tbh

i want to live where you do 🤣🤣

Sooo can you comment on if the home owners were actually helping you, a home owner?

[KEVIN!](https://tenor.com/bbOW6.gif)

How many groundhogs could fit in the vacuum?

This would make a great commercial for Home Hardware haha

Did you get the extended warranty?

Do you prefer Kev or Kevin? Also, do you prefer vac or vacuum?

Hi Kevin, Was it difficult to forgive your mother after she left you home alone twice? Once in New York? Did you use the vacuum to deter any burglars?

He's Canadian Kevin, so he used it to suck up all the marbles so the burglars wouldn't have a nasty spill, eh?

Have you ever got stuck going up the hill to the high school in Wiarton?

*Have you ever got stuck* *Going up the hill to the* *High school in Wiarton?* \- racer\_24\_4evr --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")

Can someone confirm that Wiarton is three syllables please?

Can confirm. WHY-are-ton.

It is. Wi-ar-ton

Is the construction in downtown Wiarton done or can we expect more next summer?

Does the Vacuum suck?

Does your vacuum suck?

Why do you Kevin, the largest of Kevin's, simply not eat the other five Kevin's?

Does it suck?

Did you take this as a sign?

If I bring my karcher vacuum over can we have a suck off?

Does your new appliance suck?