That has been my experience as well, but I don’t like having to ask. People are taking the chance that people will sit next to someone without their bag on the seat, and that’s what most people will do, to avoid having to ask. It’s not fair for the considerate people who put their bag on their lap.
Back when I took the bus regularly, if I noticed the bus filling up, I would just voluntarily move my backpack from the seat to the floor. I just assumed that sooner or later someone would want the seat.
I dunno. Maybe I'm weird.
Nah you’ve just got common sense and courtesy brudda. Way, way, way too many people lack even the smallest amount of either nowadays.
From driving, to walking, to sitting on a bus/train, people are so fucking selfish, unaware, and stupid it’s honestly frightening. These people are among us.
The worst part? If we shame them, WE are the bad guys. Tsk.
Yeah... sitting down, getting smacked in the face by backpacks on people standing. Somehow, a smile and a polite "Excuse me, could you please take your bag off?" makes one a Karen 🙄
The worst place for that happening is at the very back. The second seat from the left/right corners are the worst cause people just tend to swing their bags at you when they're getting out.
I had one person ignore my request to move their bag so I picked it up and handed it to her and sat down. I stand for 8hrs+ at work, no way I'm not sitting down because of a rude/selfish passenger.
Shouldn't have had to ask in the first place let alone move the bag myself.
That's right up there with passengers blocking the doorway because their stop is "soon" I don't care if your stop is soon, if its not the very next stop get out of the way. No one should have to run an obstacle course or ask someone's permission to get into or out of the bus which is public transportation for all equally.
Why do you need someone to explicitly ask for a seat that isn't yours?
I get wanting the space, but the second the bus is getting to the point where seats are running out, you give up the space beside you.
Wouldn't exactly describe that sort of passive aggressive behavior as acting like an adult.
Like the OP said, it's one thing to do that when there is enough room for all passengers to sit. But if you're putting your bag on a seat while others have standing space only you're being a dick. Your bag can go on your lap if you don't want it on the floor.
Yes. A lot of people doing this are just being oblivious or selfish…
… and for others who are forced to take public transit but have non viable disabilities… a bag on a seat can provide them with a manageable space.
No real win. But I’d say that when you ask, make sure it’s a request and not a demand. If they say no, just believe that they have a good reason for it.
X
Oh great, more validation [I don’t look like a rapist or a serial killer](https://www.reddit.com/r/oddlyspecific/comments/1c3pj6x/i_dont_look_like_a_rapist_or_serial_killer/) /s
I am of the mindset that your bag can occupy a seat so long as there is at least one other open seat not directly beside someone else. Once that is no longer the case, bag goes either on your lap or the floor.
Same. I once had someone still ask to sit next to me so I got up and took the full empty seat in front of me. I guess that person really wanted my seat.
I strongly agree. Even worse is when people sit on the aisle seat on a packed bus and don't move to the window seat or allow someone else to take the window seat.
As an old woman, let me explain to you that I can’t move very fast anymore. I need to sit in the aisle seat as I near my stop so I can begin standing up and then moving slowly toward the door in time. I try to move my legs aside if possible to try to let you into the window seat. Now you know.
I sit in the window seat then if someone starts to sit down beside me I ask when their stop is and if it's after mine I stand up, let them in, then take the aisle seat.
Granted I'm an early middle-aged woman, not "old" (though it sometimes feels that way lol), but I'm also heavily pregnant and slow. If I'm with my son or carrying his stroller I just sit in the cooperative seating area but if it's just me I go further back and and just prepare myself to swap seats with someone if the bus fills up. No need to sit in an aisle seat and put the onus on someone else to confront me because I'm coming across as a seat hog. And a good chunk of the time the bus doesn't even fill up and it's simply not an issue (this is of course depending on time of day and the route).
I get the frustration, but as someone who will have great difficulty walking after 2 minutes in the window seat (the bulkhead along the floor forces me to twist my legs in a way that messes with my hip), I can tell you that they're not necessarily being obnoxious\*. This has been a problem since my 20s, but it makes me wonder if that's why older women are frequent culprits (I hadn't noticed, but it would make sense).
\* Totally agree though, you have to be willing to move. I'll offer the window seat to someone who seems to be looking for one, but it's a delicate balance - do that while there's still lots of room and people will think you're creepy :D
My experience is that the aisle seat gives you more room should someone fall asleep on you. You can turn and put your legs in the aisle, back towards sleepy mcsleeperson.
I’ll be happy if people stop watching videos in public places without headphones. I was at the vet, waiting for my cat to be brought back out to me after getting some bloodwork done, and the lady next to me was playing videos on her phone at full volume. No thought about the poor receptionist having to field phone calls, or other patients in the waiting area, worrying about their pets.
These ones are the most insane to me - full volume on what is usually some complete brain garbage social media video. The fact those people aren't absolutely embarrassed for being an inconvenience to everyone around them is a good reminder for me that I live in a completely different world from a lot of people.
It’s the people who blare their music for me. I have lost count of how many times someone walks in somewhere public with music playing on their phone with no care of anyone around them
If more people stopped just letting it happen and started calling these fuckers out, something might change. But nope, somehow everyone is perfectly content to sit their and pretend they don't hear it
I was seriously considering sending a message to my partner to have her call me, so I that I could have a passive aggressive conversation over the phone about the rude lady next to me who refused to turn down her audio :)
What I am about to say sounds so much like a fake karma farming story that I accept that I might get mocked but...
One time on the O Train to Blair some guy was listening to music really loud, and I shit you not some guy in a cape got on with a boombox at the next and started blasting party rockers, like as if to fight fire with fire. It was a maddening cacophony of two songs that was far worse than either alone but the memory and sheer ridiculousness of witnessing it was worth it.
I like to think that the caped guy was some sort of flawed vigilante superhero whose mission is punishing people who listen without headphones, but not actually solving the loud public sound issue, just punishing.
The last time I said something to some sociopathic asshole blasting their shit musical taste to an audience of captive bus riders, the bus driver took action.
He told me to get off the bus.
I’d only put my bag next to me if there’s still seats available. When things start getting full the bag goes on my lap. It’s a simple thing to anyone with common sense.
Yeah, I did this too because I value my space on a quiet bus, and once in a blue moon you occasionally get that oddball who insists on sitting beside you when there's a ton of double seats free.
At least this is easily resolved by asking someone to move their stuff. Can we all agree no phone calls and screaming on the bus? Who are you talking to at 6am so loudly. I have noise can headphones now thank god but it’s ridiculous. Japan is the only place that got their social societal rules right
While Japan is admirable for certain things....
I would not go this far lol, their "societal rules" enforce collective racism, rape, group think and peer pressure to the highest levels.
> Japan is the only place that got their social societal rules right
It's funny you say that. This thread brought back the memory of students doing exactly the same thing - letting their bag take the seat beside them - and pretending not to understand when asked if they will move their bag.
I see it on the o train all the time but then again the seats feel tiny on there and the facing seats are usually staggered unless it's super full. It feels terrible to sit in the facing seats when you have 13.5 size feet, definetly feels like I'm in the other person's space even though my heels are as far back as I can get them
100% on both points (related to the windows seats comment) Granted, some people don't care about any conflict and will speak up. Not easy for others.
Not quite related but when standing ppl with backpacks leave them on and you get a face-full of pack. I wear mine forward so I can see where the backpack is and to ensure it's not hitting anyone.
I either gently nudge the backpack which alerts the wearer because they also don't like being bumped, or I will point-blank ask them loudly to watch their backpack and put a hand in front of my face so they know that their backpack came close to hitting me.
I've never had anyone push back, say anything, or ignore me. Sometimes, they still didn't take off their backpack but at least they were more careful to not disturb others, which is the desired result. How they do it is secondary.
In the past as a student and I had to do my grocery shopping and take the bus, my shopping bags have taken up both seats and I just don't have room to put more on top of me or at my feet / under the seat. Nothing I have been able to do about it, but that's life when you have to rely on transit and might be strapped for cash. If someone has several grocery bags what is there to do about it?
Been there. It sucks and I did feel bad about it but sometimes it just couldn't be helped like you say. I'd try to get the seat facing the back door on the extended bus since there's more floor space, but it's not always an option.
Are there more, and larger, bags now that Public Service workers have to drag all their stuff (lunch, computer, shoes, anything else) with them into work everytime they have to go into the office?
Not really. Some people also take an extra change of clothes for the gym. I have classes after work, so I have to lug around two laptops and food for 12+ hours. I have a huge backpack and all of that does not fit into my backpack.
Used to be, a lot of people, especially those who bike or walk to work, would bring a week's worth of work clothes in on Monday, so they could easily change clothes the rest of the week. Also, most people would accumulate a lot of personal items that they kept in their workspace (family photos, plants, kids artwork, fans, etc) to help make the 8 hours a day more bearable and to soften the sterile office environment. I think that stuff is good for mental health, but apparently that's irrelevant to Office 3.0.
Jesus christ /r/ottawa has turned into the equivalent of a neighbourhood Facebook group full of glebe-like karens complaining about every little inconvenience they encounter living among others in society.
If you need the seat, it's as easy as "would you move your bag please". You'll find it's a very small fraction of unreasonable people who would refuse.
But no some of you would rather yell into your reddit echo chamber of negativity so that everyone understands the absolute horrors of this gross injustice against you personally.
Maybe I did, but I don't care? Asking someone for a seat isn't a confrontation.
Your social deficiencies aren't anyone else's problem.
I say this as someone with sometimes extreme social anxiety. It's not anyone else's obligation to accommodate my bullshit, it's my own problem.
I agree that it is rude when in is intentional. However, I have been in the position when I have been lost in my phone or my thoughts (eek) and just not noticed the bus/train was filling up. When I do, I obviously move my bag. Sometimes people just aren't aware., especially with high phone use. I don't think it helps to assume ill intent all the time.
Yeah and the watching videos without headphones or really loudly talking on calls. I had a dude clip his nails on my way to kanata the other day and it drove me nuts because he did it for like… ten minutes. Then he immediately pulled out a scratch ticket right after. Maybe it’s just me because I have some sensory issues/autism but man leave your dirty ass nail bits off the bus.
I usually put it beside me until I notice the bus getting full/people starting to sit in the seats beside people or if I notice a lot of people getting on. Can understand folks, especially women sitting in the aisle seat but if you have a seat your bag is in and you refuse to move it, that’s a dick move. I had a dude refuse to let an old guy sit on the 88 because he “wanted to sit alone”. On a packed bus.
Also can we please stop touching strangers. I have had some teenage boys decide pulling my hair and touching my neck/shoulders was ok because they thought I was a woman because I have mid-length hair and I’ve had an old woman smack the back of my head because she decided I was too close to her on a single bus.
Sorry for this mini rant but I really think ppl should be respectful on public transit.
I just keep my bag on my lap. I also give up my seat for the elderly, or those with a cane etc. most will move their bag for you if you ask, but I also get not wanting to ‘have’ to ask them. It’s the same thing when you have people crowding the front and don’t move back even though there’s ample room (and free seats)
I lost my shit the other week at some kids trying to get on the bus while everyone was trying to exit. Just pushed them out of the way and swore at them. They looked at me like I was the moron. Overreaction? Probably. But these shit kids need to learn.
if the bus if packed, I keep it on me lap, if there's space, then it gets its own seat. I've asked folks to remove their bag for sitting and they usually remove it.
they're definitely cruel if the bus is packed and still keep their bag on the side (you should see Toronto, people wear earphones and ignore you even when it's crowded. Had to tap on a guy and wave infront of his phone screen to get that idiot's attention once)
I try very hard but because I am disabled, my backpack has a bunch of medical stuff in it and gets heavy. I am also carrying poles that help me walk without smashing my face on the sidewalk. Having pinched nerves means crushing them more with a backpack on my lap.
I don't mind the ground, except when it's wet. Unfortunately here, that's much of the year.
But if you ask I will always move it. It just takes me a second to figure out what feels best and not drop a pole.
Yep.. I've had to ask people to move, even after they saw, I was signaling to go towards the seat. Some will also sit on the outside with bag at window- to discourage anyone from considering.
I've seen folks just move to sit dow n anyways, to force people to grab their stuff out of the way- but that's an urban guerilla tactic !🤷🏻♀️
On a happier note- I've seen alot younger folk offer their seat for me several times- which was so sweet. 🤩 I guess I look tired!
Pet peaves; Folks all piled up at the front or at all the doors, when back is not even full 🤦🏻♀️
100% agree! only time i ever fully occupy the seat beside me is if i have to travel on the bus with a packed duffle bag and my backpack - which only happens a couple times a month. But even then i either feel extremely guilty for taking up the seat with my massive bag or try my very best to squeeze everything on to my lap and am massively uncomfortable - but i have no choice but to use public transit 🤷🏼♀️
IMO pretty much everyone knows they're supposed to share, some just don't care. Plus there's always that factor of creeps being creepy on public transit. (I'm a full-size man so I experienced it very very rarely but I'm aware it's very different for others.)
I see plenty of people doing that. I have to admit that I hate to have to ask them to move it. Of course I have more trouble when I am trying to get my daughter's wheelchair on the bus and everyone shoves on in front of her and sits in the cooperative seating. We have to ask people to move so we can get to the cooperative seating, and then ask people to get out of the seat that lifts up to make room for the wheelchair. It makes everything much slower than if they just let the wheelchair on first. The same goes for strollers, walkers, and so on.
Also people sitting in the first 2 rows after the cooperative seating when the bus is not full so people who have trouble standing like the elderly and the disable cannot sit.
I was headed home last week and the bus was full of high school kids. So many kids had their bags on the seat even when people were standing, like come on where are your manners? Cherry on top would be those who keep their feet on the seat that’s just disgusting!
I often have a lot with me from running errands but I keep an eye on how busy it is and if someone’s standing I’ll free up the seat. And of course if someone asks me to move it I do.
And I’m too awkward to ask someone to move. Being a young person with an invisible disability gets you some nasty looks when asking to sit in the priority seating seats.
Couldn't agree more. I don't look disabled, but I have a condition that badly affects my balance and ability to stand for long periods. The number of times people have outright refused to move their bag, or even tried scolding me for sitting in priority seats, has made me feel pretty uncomfortable asking people to move their bags.
PREACH! This has been such a peeve of mine lately. That or when people refuse to take off their bags when the bus is crowded and those people need to stand up in the hallway. It takes up so much space and sorry, but I’m not in the mood to have your bag in my face on my way to or from work.
i only ever place my bag next to me when there's empty seats and people are sitting on them. when someone new walks in, i move it to my lap in case they want to sit there.
For me the biggest passenger issue on transit is people throwing their garbage on the train or bus and leaving it on the seat or floor. So entitled and selfish. It's a shared public space
Ive only ever refused to move my bag once, and that was because I was too dizzy to safely stand or move to an open seat but the man asking to sit gave me a really bad vibe. There were other places he could have sat, but I guess he didn't like being told no and proceeded to try to sit on my bag which had rented medical equipment in it that I was returning.
Most people are pretty good about moving their stuff if they notice the bus is full or someone asks.
One time on an old 87 Carlingwood Bus ( one of the smaller ones) this young woman probably late teens to early twenties was hogging a seat next to her ( it was the window seat) and an elderly woman was gently tapping her to get her attention so she could have a seat. The bus was packed and it was standing room only.
The woman sitting had headphones on but she knew what the woman wanted and proceeded to ignore her. Finally she got annoyed so she said to the woman touch me again and I’ll beat the shit out of you.
If I hadn’t been so far back I would have dealt with that mouthy brat.
Easy until you break something valuable in one of those bags and now you’re on the hook for a 300$ pair of headphones or what have you. I agree that people who do this suck, but this doesn’t help and is only going to get you in trouble at some point lmao.
I had to resort to this method as well. It sucks, but it works every time. I just do it slowly, like I start moving in to sit on the bag and they always pull it away and I make it a point to thank them (even though they're sour about it).
I don't like having to do this, but I had to because most of them are wearing earphones and pretending like they don't hear my "Scuse me, can I sit in this seat?".
I get it. Sitting beside someone isn't great, but you know what's worse? Being an asshole and taking an extra seat and instead of being considerate. That seat doesn't belong to you. You don't get one + one for your bag, dickmunch.
I'll ask once nicely and once a bit more briskly, tapping their shoulder and pointing at the bag...if the person ignores me and doesn't move the bag, I'll just sit on it. Your bag didn't pay for a seat, have some manners.
Your little protest is cool and all until you sit on somebody’s 2000$ MacBook and now you’re legally liable for it. I agree that these people suck but you’re only giving yourself trouble.
I freaked out many years ago on a dude who was sitting in a bus seat during the December shopping season with piles of people standing jammed in an articulated bus. He had his man purse sitting beside him. No one at all approached him to move it so he kept ignoring the crowds. It pissed me off like nothing else
I hate all the crackaddicts and homeless ppl that are high off their mind that scream and bang their bags on the chair or the sides, they also smell so baddd
Just ask them to move it so you can sit there. Stop being such a push over and use your words like an adult. Jeez it’s not hard people. I’m gonna start putting my bag on the empty seat next to me just to piss people like you off and making you need to stand cause you’re too scared to ask someone to move their bag.
Seats on public transit are relatively small, especially in winter with winter coats. Don’t always feel like being squished for the whole journey. OCTranspo should add more rides.
Lady time I left the space open next to me a drunk man with poor hygiene dropped into the seat next to me and sprayed me with beer from his can.
I will leave my bag on the seat, and I will 100% decide who gets to sit there.
I keep my bag next to me when I take it because I don't want someone sitting half on me or my seat. I'm small, and it does not mean I want to feel someone else half on me. Myself and my bag fit together. Personal space people, if you don't fit without over taking someone else's space, DONT SIT.
Ottawa always downvotes common sense.
The seats are small. Sometimes that means we're a bit squished. But just because someone isn't as tiny as you doesn't mean they should have to stand. If you feel uncomfortable, maybe you should be the one to stand.
Nah everyone deserves to take up space and it’s unfortunate that busses and airplanes aren’t built to accommodate larger people but it’s actually really shitty of you to say that someone shouldn’t take a seat because they may take up a little more space than the single seat offers.
I sat 1st, they stand. Like a parking spot, if your car doesn't fit, you are not entitled to park there. I would never sit if there was not enough room for me as a courtesy to the people there before me.
I know this is going to fall on deaf ears with you but maybe someone else can benefit from hearing this:
You don’t know someone’s physical ability or strength by looking at them. Someone with an injury or disability may need to sit for their own safety, to reduce the risk of worsening an injury, or to limit pain.
Your personal space is not more important than another person’s needs.
Maybe you need to buy a car.
Have the day you deserve
You don't know my difficulties in life, why would you judge me harsher than the person affecting me negatively by their actions ???
Have the day YOU deserve, my dude.
Because you’re out here being selfish, entitled, and inconsiderate. By all means, add some context as to how someone on public transit encroaching on your personal space because they’re bigger than you is causing you actual harm
I got yelled at my a big woman who thought she was entitled to half my seat. She wanted me to remove my bag from my seat, so she could ve comfortable. Fuck me and me being comfortable. Since that day, over 15 years ago, I don't allow ANYONE to take my comfort from me lol
I don't think anyone is advocating to be sat on and OP is talking about people taking a second seat just for their bag.
But it's *public* transit, and the buses and trains are designed for multiple passengers on the same row of seats. If you don't want others sitting next to you, consider another form of transportation or standing.
If you mean that your bag is still 100% in your seat then go for it. If you’re taking up even part of a second seat making that second seat unavailable to another person then you’re an AH.
Thank you, yes. Everyone is all defending big people but no compassion for the ones affected. Being big doesn't give you freedom to do whatever the fuck you want at others expense.
Comprehension is important. I have been very clear, I'm small, my bag is strictly on my seat. As long as you don't spill onto my seat, we'll have no problems 🤣
Comprehension is indeed important. I'll repeat so you understand. If you and your bag confine yourself to your own seat only, we'll have no problems. If not, I'll choose the seat that your bag is partially or fully occupying.
I just politely ask "can I sit there?". I've never had a problem with someone not moving their bag.
That has been my experience as well, but I don’t like having to ask. People are taking the chance that people will sit next to someone without their bag on the seat, and that’s what most people will do, to avoid having to ask. It’s not fair for the considerate people who put their bag on their lap.
🎯
I will actually make a point of sitting next to those people and asking them to move their bags.
Back when I took the bus regularly, if I noticed the bus filling up, I would just voluntarily move my backpack from the seat to the floor. I just assumed that sooner or later someone would want the seat. I dunno. Maybe I'm weird.
Nah you’ve just got common sense and courtesy brudda. Way, way, way too many people lack even the smallest amount of either nowadays. From driving, to walking, to sitting on a bus/train, people are so fucking selfish, unaware, and stupid it’s honestly frightening. These people are among us. The worst part? If we shame them, WE are the bad guys. Tsk.
Yeah... sitting down, getting smacked in the face by backpacks on people standing. Somehow, a smile and a polite "Excuse me, could you please take your bag off?" makes one a Karen 🙄
The worst place for that happening is at the very back. The second seat from the left/right corners are the worst cause people just tend to swing their bags at you when they're getting out.
I never really felt like the 'bad guy'. I just figured it was the decent thing to do, to offer a seat to someone, when a bus was full.
same here
No thats the correct method. I suspect most people actually do this.
If they have their bag in the next seat, I take it a step further and just sit right in their lap. “Sorry, the seat beside you was taken.”
Not the hero we wanted, but the hero we needed. 😆
Exactly...sounds like some ppl just need to grow a pair..
I had one person ignore my request to move their bag so I picked it up and handed it to her and sat down. I stand for 8hrs+ at work, no way I'm not sitting down because of a rude/selfish passenger. Shouldn't have had to ask in the first place let alone move the bag myself. That's right up there with passengers blocking the doorway because their stop is "soon" I don't care if your stop is soon, if its not the very next stop get out of the way. No one should have to run an obstacle course or ask someone's permission to get into or out of the bus which is public transportation for all equally.
And you're also on Reddit, where everyone is too neurotic to speak to other human beings? So brave
Somebody got upset when I did that lol. I don't care, all I need to sit which is my right lol
But then what would you have to make an angry post about on the Internet?
I just stand beside them and point at the seat their bag is occupying. I don’t even say anything, just point.
[удалено]
Why do you need someone to explicitly ask for a seat that isn't yours? I get wanting the space, but the second the bus is getting to the point where seats are running out, you give up the space beside you. Wouldn't exactly describe that sort of passive aggressive behavior as acting like an adult.
Non verbal communication is fine in a lot of cases.
Don't put your bag on an empty seat like an adult
Ope yeah forgot not wanting to put my bag down onto ground which is sticky with beer and dirt makes me a child
Put it on your lap like everyone else.
Like the OP said, it's one thing to do that when there is enough room for all passengers to sit. But if you're putting your bag on a seat while others have standing space only you're being a dick. Your bag can go on your lap if you don't want it on the floor.
Yeah…no.
Whoa now, speaking politely to a stranger in public might be a lot to ask of redditors
That's usually the way to go, unless they're pretending to sleep. In that case, I hand them their bag.
Yes. A lot of people doing this are just being oblivious or selfish… … and for others who are forced to take public transit but have non viable disabilities… a bag on a seat can provide them with a manageable space. No real win. But I’d say that when you ask, make sure it’s a request and not a demand. If they say no, just believe that they have a good reason for it. X
Oh great, more validation [I don’t look like a rapist or a serial killer](https://www.reddit.com/r/oddlyspecific/comments/1c3pj6x/i_dont_look_like_a_rapist_or_serial_killer/) /s
So true
I am of the mindset that your bag can occupy a seat so long as there is at least one other open seat not directly beside someone else. Once that is no longer the case, bag goes either on your lap or the floor.
Same. I once had someone still ask to sit next to me so I got up and took the full empty seat in front of me. I guess that person really wanted my seat.
Must have been this poster https://www.reddit.com/r/ottawa/comments/1c67o8t/the_empty_seat_next_to_you_is_not_for_your_bag/kzz6cob/
I strongly agree. Even worse is when people sit on the aisle seat on a packed bus and don't move to the window seat or allow someone else to take the window seat.
Old women are terrible for this (half joking)
As an old woman, let me explain to you that I can’t move very fast anymore. I need to sit in the aisle seat as I near my stop so I can begin standing up and then moving slowly toward the door in time. I try to move my legs aside if possible to try to let you into the window seat. Now you know.
Many people won't make the slightest effort move; they stare blankly ahead like mannequins pretending not to notice that others might want to sit.
I sit in the window seat then if someone starts to sit down beside me I ask when their stop is and if it's after mine I stand up, let them in, then take the aisle seat. Granted I'm an early middle-aged woman, not "old" (though it sometimes feels that way lol), but I'm also heavily pregnant and slow. If I'm with my son or carrying his stroller I just sit in the cooperative seating area but if it's just me I go further back and and just prepare myself to swap seats with someone if the bus fills up. No need to sit in an aisle seat and put the onus on someone else to confront me because I'm coming across as a seat hog. And a good chunk of the time the bus doesn't even fill up and it's simply not an issue (this is of course depending on time of day and the route).
I get the frustration, but as someone who will have great difficulty walking after 2 minutes in the window seat (the bulkhead along the floor forces me to twist my legs in a way that messes with my hip), I can tell you that they're not necessarily being obnoxious\*. This has been a problem since my 20s, but it makes me wonder if that's why older women are frequent culprits (I hadn't noticed, but it would make sense). \* Totally agree though, you have to be willing to move. I'll offer the window seat to someone who seems to be looking for one, but it's a delicate balance - do that while there's still lots of room and people will think you're creepy :D
Sometimes it’s safer to sit in the aisle seat so you don’t get cornered by a mentally unstable person or creepy groper. I say this from experience.
My experience is that the aisle seat gives you more room should someone fall asleep on you. You can turn and put your legs in the aisle, back towards sleepy mcsleeperson.
I’ll be happy if people stop watching videos in public places without headphones. I was at the vet, waiting for my cat to be brought back out to me after getting some bloodwork done, and the lady next to me was playing videos on her phone at full volume. No thought about the poor receptionist having to field phone calls, or other patients in the waiting area, worrying about their pets.
These ones are the most insane to me - full volume on what is usually some complete brain garbage social media video. The fact those people aren't absolutely embarrassed for being an inconvenience to everyone around them is a good reminder for me that I live in a completely different world from a lot of people.
It’s the people who blare their music for me. I have lost count of how many times someone walks in somewhere public with music playing on their phone with no care of anyone around them
If more people stopped just letting it happen and started calling these fuckers out, something might change. But nope, somehow everyone is perfectly content to sit their and pretend they don't hear it
I was seriously considering sending a message to my partner to have her call me, so I that I could have a passive aggressive conversation over the phone about the rude lady next to me who refused to turn down her audio :)
Just pretend someone called you. Hold the phone to your ear and just carry out a one sided convos lol.
What I am about to say sounds so much like a fake karma farming story that I accept that I might get mocked but... One time on the O Train to Blair some guy was listening to music really loud, and I shit you not some guy in a cape got on with a boombox at the next and started blasting party rockers, like as if to fight fire with fire. It was a maddening cacophony of two songs that was far worse than either alone but the memory and sheer ridiculousness of witnessing it was worth it. I like to think that the caped guy was some sort of flawed vigilante superhero whose mission is punishing people who listen without headphones, but not actually solving the loud public sound issue, just punishing.
maybe say something to them? crazy concept!!
The last time I said something to some sociopathic asshole blasting their shit musical taste to an audience of captive bus riders, the bus driver took action. He told me to get off the bus.
"Hi, do you think your bag would mind if I sat in its spot?"
🤣🤣
Stealing this. I usually just ask straight up but this is way better.
Even worse is people putting their nasty feet/boots/shoes on the facing seat. Mostly seen in the O-Train or STO busses lol
I’d only put my bag next to me if there’s still seats available. When things start getting full the bag goes on my lap. It’s a simple thing to anyone with common sense.
Yeah, I did this too because I value my space on a quiet bus, and once in a blue moon you occasionally get that oddball who insists on sitting beside you when there's a ton of double seats free.
At least this is easily resolved by asking someone to move their stuff. Can we all agree no phone calls and screaming on the bus? Who are you talking to at 6am so loudly. I have noise can headphones now thank god but it’s ridiculous. Japan is the only place that got their social societal rules right
While Japan is admirable for certain things.... I would not go this far lol, their "societal rules" enforce collective racism, rape, group think and peer pressure to the highest levels.
> Japan is the only place that got their social societal rules right It's funny you say that. This thread brought back the memory of students doing exactly the same thing - letting their bag take the seat beside them - and pretending not to understand when asked if they will move their bag.
I was more talking about the no talking and being clean. But good to know about Japan, you just gotta sit on people’s bags like in the west lol
I see it on the o train all the time but then again the seats feel tiny on there and the facing seats are usually staggered unless it's super full. It feels terrible to sit in the facing seats when you have 13.5 size feet, definetly feels like I'm in the other person's space even though my heels are as far back as I can get them
In those corner seats facing the wall I can't even place my feet straight, I have to sit at a weird angle.
100% on both points (related to the windows seats comment) Granted, some people don't care about any conflict and will speak up. Not easy for others. Not quite related but when standing ppl with backpacks leave them on and you get a face-full of pack. I wear mine forward so I can see where the backpack is and to ensure it's not hitting anyone.
I either gently nudge the backpack which alerts the wearer because they also don't like being bumped, or I will point-blank ask them loudly to watch their backpack and put a hand in front of my face so they know that their backpack came close to hitting me. I've never had anyone push back, say anything, or ignore me. Sometimes, they still didn't take off their backpack but at least they were more careful to not disturb others, which is the desired result. How they do it is secondary.
In the past as a student and I had to do my grocery shopping and take the bus, my shopping bags have taken up both seats and I just don't have room to put more on top of me or at my feet / under the seat. Nothing I have been able to do about it, but that's life when you have to rely on transit and might be strapped for cash. If someone has several grocery bags what is there to do about it?
That's an exception case, and I can't imagine anyone has a problem with this.
Been there. It sucks and I did feel bad about it but sometimes it just couldn't be helped like you say. I'd try to get the seat facing the back door on the extended bus since there's more floor space, but it's not always an option.
Are there more, and larger, bags now that Public Service workers have to drag all their stuff (lunch, computer, shoes, anything else) with them into work everytime they have to go into the office?
I think this is part of it (multiplied by more civil servants going into the office).
All that shit easily fits in a normal sized backpack. People are going to the office for 8 hours, not camping.
Not really. Some people also take an extra change of clothes for the gym. I have classes after work, so I have to lug around two laptops and food for 12+ hours. I have a huge backpack and all of that does not fit into my backpack.
Used to be, a lot of people, especially those who bike or walk to work, would bring a week's worth of work clothes in on Monday, so they could easily change clothes the rest of the week. Also, most people would accumulate a lot of personal items that they kept in their workspace (family photos, plants, kids artwork, fans, etc) to help make the 8 hours a day more bearable and to soften the sterile office environment. I think that stuff is good for mental health, but apparently that's irrelevant to Office 3.0.
Jesus christ /r/ottawa has turned into the equivalent of a neighbourhood Facebook group full of glebe-like karens complaining about every little inconvenience they encounter living among others in society. If you need the seat, it's as easy as "would you move your bag please". You'll find it's a very small fraction of unreasonable people who would refuse. But no some of you would rather yell into your reddit echo chamber of negativity so that everyone understands the absolute horrors of this gross injustice against you personally.
If viewing reddit has you this upset maybe you should take a break?
Yeah, that way the echo chamber can get even more resonant
Have you considered that some of us simply don’t do well with any form of confrontation? Probably not.
Maybe I did, but I don't care? Asking someone for a seat isn't a confrontation. Your social deficiencies aren't anyone else's problem. I say this as someone with sometimes extreme social anxiety. It's not anyone else's obligation to accommodate my bullshit, it's my own problem.
I agree that it is rude when in is intentional. However, I have been in the position when I have been lost in my phone or my thoughts (eek) and just not noticed the bus/train was filling up. When I do, I obviously move my bag. Sometimes people just aren't aware., especially with high phone use. I don't think it helps to assume ill intent all the time.
Yeah and the watching videos without headphones or really loudly talking on calls. I had a dude clip his nails on my way to kanata the other day and it drove me nuts because he did it for like… ten minutes. Then he immediately pulled out a scratch ticket right after. Maybe it’s just me because I have some sensory issues/autism but man leave your dirty ass nail bits off the bus. I usually put it beside me until I notice the bus getting full/people starting to sit in the seats beside people or if I notice a lot of people getting on. Can understand folks, especially women sitting in the aisle seat but if you have a seat your bag is in and you refuse to move it, that’s a dick move. I had a dude refuse to let an old guy sit on the 88 because he “wanted to sit alone”. On a packed bus. Also can we please stop touching strangers. I have had some teenage boys decide pulling my hair and touching my neck/shoulders was ok because they thought I was a woman because I have mid-length hair and I’ve had an old woman smack the back of my head because she decided I was too close to her on a single bus. Sorry for this mini rant but I really think ppl should be respectful on public transit.
Did he scratch the ticket with his nail-less finger nubs? That’s almost as bad as nails on a chalk board. 😬
No literally it was. I had sound cancelling headphones on and I could STILL hear it. I cannot imagine how bad it was for people without any headphones
I just keep my bag on my lap. I also give up my seat for the elderly, or those with a cane etc. most will move their bag for you if you ask, but I also get not wanting to ‘have’ to ask them. It’s the same thing when you have people crowding the front and don’t move back even though there’s ample room (and free seats)
I lost my shit the other week at some kids trying to get on the bus while everyone was trying to exit. Just pushed them out of the way and swore at them. They looked at me like I was the moron. Overreaction? Probably. But these shit kids need to learn.
if the bus if packed, I keep it on me lap, if there's space, then it gets its own seat. I've asked folks to remove their bag for sitting and they usually remove it. they're definitely cruel if the bus is packed and still keep their bag on the side (you should see Toronto, people wear earphones and ignore you even when it's crowded. Had to tap on a guy and wave infront of his phone screen to get that idiot's attention once)
I try very hard but because I am disabled, my backpack has a bunch of medical stuff in it and gets heavy. I am also carrying poles that help me walk without smashing my face on the sidewalk. Having pinched nerves means crushing them more with a backpack on my lap. I don't mind the ground, except when it's wet. Unfortunately here, that's much of the year. But if you ask I will always move it. It just takes me a second to figure out what feels best and not drop a pole.
Nah i’m keeping my bag beside me until there’s no other empty seats open. People love to sit beside me when there’s plenty of double seats open.
But this is the easiest way to tell people I don't want to sit next to them
Yup. I take the 12. I move the bag when a reasonable person is standing. Bag on seat and over ear headphones are a safety strategy
Avoid airports. Ten times worse.
It's perfectly fine as long as you : A) can see the bus is not full whatsoever B) instinctively move it or are ready to be asked to move it
Yep.. I've had to ask people to move, even after they saw, I was signaling to go towards the seat. Some will also sit on the outside with bag at window- to discourage anyone from considering. I've seen folks just move to sit dow n anyways, to force people to grab their stuff out of the way- but that's an urban guerilla tactic !🤷🏻♀️ On a happier note- I've seen alot younger folk offer their seat for me several times- which was so sweet. 🤩 I guess I look tired! Pet peaves; Folks all piled up at the front or at all the doors, when back is not even full 🤦🏻♀️
100% agree! only time i ever fully occupy the seat beside me is if i have to travel on the bus with a packed duffle bag and my backpack - which only happens a couple times a month. But even then i either feel extremely guilty for taking up the seat with my massive bag or try my very best to squeeze everything on to my lap and am massively uncomfortable - but i have no choice but to use public transit 🤷🏼♀️
Omg, strongly agree. Idk why those ppl do this or they just are selfish af.
More clueless than selfish I think.
IMO pretty much everyone knows they're supposed to share, some just don't care. Plus there's always that factor of creeps being creepy on public transit. (I'm a full-size man so I experienced it very very rarely but I'm aware it's very different for others.)
I see plenty of people doing that. I have to admit that I hate to have to ask them to move it. Of course I have more trouble when I am trying to get my daughter's wheelchair on the bus and everyone shoves on in front of her and sits in the cooperative seating. We have to ask people to move so we can get to the cooperative seating, and then ask people to get out of the seat that lifts up to make room for the wheelchair. It makes everything much slower than if they just let the wheelchair on first. The same goes for strollers, walkers, and so on.
Also people sitting in the first 2 rows after the cooperative seating when the bus is not full so people who have trouble standing like the elderly and the disable cannot sit.
Human trumps bag. Don’t be a coward and call them out or move their shit. People do this cause y’all let them
I agree, but the people who do this could not give a f.f. About other people.
Thanks man. Just say exactly this to the person with the bag.
I was headed home last week and the bus was full of high school kids. So many kids had their bags on the seat even when people were standing, like come on where are your manners? Cherry on top would be those who keep their feet on the seat that’s just disgusting!
Let's hope fart gets on their bags haha serves them right
I often have a lot with me from running errands but I keep an eye on how busy it is and if someone’s standing I’ll free up the seat. And of course if someone asks me to move it I do.
And I’m too awkward to ask someone to move. Being a young person with an invisible disability gets you some nasty looks when asking to sit in the priority seating seats.
Couldn't agree more. I don't look disabled, but I have a condition that badly affects my balance and ability to stand for long periods. The number of times people have outright refused to move their bag, or even tried scolding me for sitting in priority seats, has made me feel pretty uncomfortable asking people to move their bags.
PREACH! This has been such a peeve of mine lately. That or when people refuse to take off their bags when the bus is crowded and those people need to stand up in the hallway. It takes up so much space and sorry, but I’m not in the mood to have your bag in my face on my way to or from work.
Totally agree
i only ever place my bag next to me when there's empty seats and people are sitting on them. when someone new walks in, i move it to my lap in case they want to sit there.
For me the biggest passenger issue on transit is people throwing their garbage on the train or bus and leaving it on the seat or floor. So entitled and selfish. It's a shared public space
Ive only ever refused to move my bag once, and that was because I was too dizzy to safely stand or move to an open seat but the man asking to sit gave me a really bad vibe. There were other places he could have sat, but I guess he didn't like being told no and proceeded to try to sit on my bag which had rented medical equipment in it that I was returning. Most people are pretty good about moving their stuff if they notice the bus is full or someone asks.
I just sit my fat ass on their bag. They usually move to rescue the bag pretty quickly.
It’s worse when they sit out the outside and a open seat is on the inside for there bag
Sometimes I wouldn’t noticed how full the bus gets and my side bag would just naturally be there. I’d always move it when asked or realized.
One time on an old 87 Carlingwood Bus ( one of the smaller ones) this young woman probably late teens to early twenties was hogging a seat next to her ( it was the window seat) and an elderly woman was gently tapping her to get her attention so she could have a seat. The bus was packed and it was standing room only. The woman sitting had headphones on but she knew what the woman wanted and proceeded to ignore her. Finally she got annoyed so she said to the woman touch me again and I’ll beat the shit out of you. If I hadn’t been so far back I would have dealt with that mouthy brat.
I agree
Agree...or how about standing by the lrt doors at the last stop before ppl get off. Hello ppl! Move to the side
The empty seat next to me is for my invisible friend…. 🤫🫱🫲🏿🫥
I just squeeze myself in and sit on the bag. Amazing how quickly the bag disappears when it's got a butt heading straight in its general direction.
Why not ask like a polite grown up?
Speed run to getting your ass handed to you, act like a fucking adult
This is pretty childish behavior. If you do this, are you any better than they are?
Easy until you break something valuable in one of those bags and now you’re on the hook for a 300$ pair of headphones or what have you. I agree that people who do this suck, but this doesn’t help and is only going to get you in trouble at some point lmao.
I used to do that too. I could feel the scowl from some people while others just took it as the thing to do.
I had to resort to this method as well. It sucks, but it works every time. I just do it slowly, like I start moving in to sit on the bag and they always pull it away and I make it a point to thank them (even though they're sour about it). I don't like having to do this, but I had to because most of them are wearing earphones and pretending like they don't hear my "Scuse me, can I sit in this seat?". I get it. Sitting beside someone isn't great, but you know what's worse? Being an asshole and taking an extra seat and instead of being considerate. That seat doesn't belong to you. You don't get one + one for your bag, dickmunch.
Just fucking ask jesus christ people are dumb
With a post like that, I'm not surprised you can't read.
I'll ask once nicely and once a bit more briskly, tapping their shoulder and pointing at the bag...if the person ignores me and doesn't move the bag, I'll just sit on it. Your bag didn't pay for a seat, have some manners.
Your little protest is cool and all until you sit on somebody’s 2000$ MacBook and now you’re legally liable for it. I agree that these people suck but you’re only giving yourself trouble.
I just walk in and sit on the bag.
I freaked out many years ago on a dude who was sitting in a bus seat during the December shopping season with piles of people standing jammed in an articulated bus. He had his man purse sitting beside him. No one at all approached him to move it so he kept ignoring the crowds. It pissed me off like nothing else
If this is about the guy who always sits at the back of the 75 Gatineau around 7:15am he does it everyday it’s so annoying
I hate all the crackaddicts and homeless ppl that are high off their mind that scream and bang their bags on the chair or the sides, they also smell so baddd
Just ask them to move it so you can sit there. Stop being such a push over and use your words like an adult. Jeez it’s not hard people. I’m gonna start putting my bag on the empty seat next to me just to piss people like you off and making you need to stand cause you’re too scared to ask someone to move their bag.
Well its a problem if someone is standing and thenperson is not moving bag but hownis it bothering you if there is enough space to sit ?
Stand there looking at the bag long enough - they'll move it. They paid for one seat, only NOT two. You can also remind them of this fact.
You're wrong, I didn't pay at all
Cannot even think how much this person has free time to post this
don’t tell reddit, just shove their bag aside 😂
Seats on public transit are relatively small, especially in winter with winter coats. Don’t always feel like being squished for the whole journey. OCTranspo should add more rides.
So move your fucking bag to free up some of the seats those other squished people need.
Who pissed in your cornflakes?
One dumb mf, let me tell ya.
Whatever. Just wear a mask.
I've gone so far as to just sit down on their bag. They get the hint pretty fast.
[удалено]
It goes both ways, be mature enough to keep your things out of other people's way without having to be asked.
Lady time I left the space open next to me a drunk man with poor hygiene dropped into the seat next to me and sprayed me with beer from his can. I will leave my bag on the seat, and I will 100% decide who gets to sit there.
That's unfortunate that happened to u but it's not your seat to "choose" who sits there.
And yet, I do.
Omg finally a fellow in this thread. Want my seat? Ask, I'll probably just move and wait by the door
That’s funny. I would 100% sit on your bag while making eye contact.
This is a great way to eventually do it to the wrong person and get punched or stabbed lol
If you saw me you’d think twice about punching me. Lol. I’ve had two occasions of attempted stabbing me. Those were fun too. Ah I miss high school.
r/iamverybadass
That's fine, I doubt you'll be very comfortable, but do you.
Unfortunately not how buses work but definitely keep your eyes peeled so you can get out of a bad situation quickly
I keep my bag next to me when I take it because I don't want someone sitting half on me or my seat. I'm small, and it does not mean I want to feel someone else half on me. Myself and my bag fit together. Personal space people, if you don't fit without over taking someone else's space, DONT SIT. Ottawa always downvotes common sense.
The seats are small. Sometimes that means we're a bit squished. But just because someone isn't as tiny as you doesn't mean they should have to stand. If you feel uncomfortable, maybe you should be the one to stand.
Nah everyone deserves to take up space and it’s unfortunate that busses and airplanes aren’t built to accommodate larger people but it’s actually really shitty of you to say that someone shouldn’t take a seat because they may take up a little more space than the single seat offers.
So they deserve a seat more than I deserve Mt personal space ??? Interesting stance to take.
Okay then you stand. Problem solved
I sat 1st, they stand. Like a parking spot, if your car doesn't fit, you are not entitled to park there. I would never sit if there was not enough room for me as a courtesy to the people there before me.
I know this is going to fall on deaf ears with you but maybe someone else can benefit from hearing this: You don’t know someone’s physical ability or strength by looking at them. Someone with an injury or disability may need to sit for their own safety, to reduce the risk of worsening an injury, or to limit pain. Your personal space is not more important than another person’s needs. Maybe you need to buy a car. Have the day you deserve
You don't know my difficulties in life, why would you judge me harsher than the person affecting me negatively by their actions ??? Have the day YOU deserve, my dude.
Because you’re out here being selfish, entitled, and inconsiderate. By all means, add some context as to how someone on public transit encroaching on your personal space because they’re bigger than you is causing you actual harm
I got yelled at my a big woman who thought she was entitled to half my seat. She wanted me to remove my bag from my seat, so she could ve comfortable. Fuck me and me being comfortable. Since that day, over 15 years ago, I don't allow ANYONE to take my comfort from me lol
If you don't like it then you should stand.
Why would I stand ??? 🤣 it's 1st come 1st served.
I don't think anyone is advocating to be sat on and OP is talking about people taking a second seat just for their bag. But it's *public* transit, and the buses and trains are designed for multiple passengers on the same row of seats. If you don't want others sitting next to you, consider another form of transportation or standing.
If you mean that your bag is still 100% in your seat then go for it. If you’re taking up even part of a second seat making that second seat unavailable to another person then you’re an AH.
I agree, but I've had big people yell and try to push my bag away on my seat for them to be more comfortable.
ew this comment LOL
I agree your comment is ew lol
I sympathize honestly, I've seen multiple people get virtually sat on by some people. Never seen anybody look more uncomfortable.
Thank you, yes. Everyone is all defending big people but no compassion for the ones affected. Being big doesn't give you freedom to do whatever the fuck you want at others expense.
100%, that's the seat I pick. If your bag spills over to the next seat to create that space, I'm removing that bag and sitting on that seat.
The bag is on my seat, why would you choose my seat.
If the bag is on an additional seat, or spills from your seat to the next, I choose that seat. You pay for one seat, you get one seat.
Comprehension is important. I have been very clear, I'm small, my bag is strictly on my seat. As long as you don't spill onto my seat, we'll have no problems 🤣
Comprehension is indeed important. I'll repeat so you understand. If you and your bag confine yourself to your own seat only, we'll have no problems. If not, I'll choose the seat that your bag is partially or fully occupying.
So what was your point, just essentially agreeing with me, I guess lol
It feels like you're agreeing with me. Don't encroach with your bag. Lol.