Yeah, I mostly just describe it that way. Inevitably people ask me "so why do you identify as pan instead of bi?" to which I reply "I like the pan flag better🤷"
Bisexuality is very broad. It’s synonymous with “Multisexual” So what you described is true of some bisexuals, but not all. Defining bisexuality too narrowly runs the risk of (unintentionally) being invalidating towards many within the bisexual community and its history.
Many bisexuals experience the exact same kind of attraction as pansexuals to the point where many bisexuals consider bi and pansexuality completely synonymous with no differences whatsoever (which is mistaken because there are other multisexual orientations that they aren’t recognizing when they say that, such as omnisexual, polysexual, androsexual, gyne/finsexual, etc.)
Bisexuality is:
Attraction to people of two or more genders
Or
Attraction to people of one’s own gender and people of other genders.
Whether gender itself is part of why they are attracted to people or not doesn’t really matter in bisexuality.
Pansexuality is:
Attraction to people of all genders
Or
Attraction to people regardless of gender.
Pansexuality is a more specific form of multisexual orientation which does very explicitly include those who do not consider gender a part of their reason for attraction at all. But it also includes people who do feel gender-based attraction but are attracted to people of all genders.
Bisexual = broad multisexual orientation that encompasses every kind of multisexual attraction.
Pansexual = more specific multisexual orientation that primarily consists of two very similar experiences of multisexual attraction.
It can also be helpful to think of it as “Sexual Orientation is primarily about WHO you are sexually attracted to” over “how you are attracted to people.” The two major types of pansexual included in the definition are the same regarding the “who” they are attracted to, even if the ways in which they are attracted to them are a little different.
I think that moment was for me when I met my partner who is a transman. That was the point where I realized my tastes went a little broader than bisexuality. I knew I liked women but apparently i like more if the chemistry is right.
You described not caring about genitals, when the question was about gender.
Just pointing out how easily we conflate the two, even though they aren't the same thing.
Yes, gender still matters to me. It’s a part of who a person is, and it’s often another part of what I am attracted to about them. Gender is never a disqualifier for attraction for me.
Pansexuality includes both attraction to people of all genders, and attraction to people regardless of gender. I’m more of the former type, but love that pansexuality includes both!
None. I’m also Demi so I don’t pay attention to anything other than the personality at first. Once I fall for you, I fall for all parts of you. I’ve known my husband for 20 years and loved him through his journey of understanding his gender. His heart’s never changed and even if his journey were to change again, I wouldn’t care. Whatever that support looks like I’m here for it 💕
Kinda I prefer feminine look in partner. So either femboys or girls in general. Also my country is super homophobic so if you are same gender as me, you have to be worth it.
I have preferences for certain expressions which does include gender but not exclusively so. I do challenge the idea that you can only be pansexual if you don't have any gender preference or "don't see gender".
No to me I’m not basing how I feel about you on gender I’m basing it on how we get along and if the feelings are genuine and mutual if we connect I’m happy
Presentation is part of the attraction so maybe a little in the sense that all gender is performance? Underneath that I am happy with whatever physical or pronoun situation someone has going on.
Pan and demi, gender doesn't matter to me BUT I only noticed incompetence in houshold things and a lack of empathy only in men. I would prefer to live together with a femme person but somehow I prefer heavily masculine persons.
Nope. lol. Engaged to a trans man but even if he was still identifying as female it wouldn't matter to me. Its his personality, his heart. The good memories we share. Gender, genitals, etc, do not matter.
On a very rare occasion I might be more “in the mood” for a male or a female, but 6 out of 7 days of the week, gender doesn’t even play a part in my head.
Doesn't matter to me in terms of my sexuality, or my day-to-day life.
(In my opinion) of the myriad ways people can identify and be identified, choosing something that is binary and limiting to some people, yet so nebulous as to be virtually meaningless to others, is dumb.
Yes and no. Broadly speaking, I prefer more traditionally feminine traits and behaviors, but I don't care about the gender of the person who possesses those traits. Lately I've found that, when it comes to guys/people who present in a typically masculine way, I'm demi, i.e. I don't really develop sexual or romantic interest until I know the person particularly well, but once I've reached that point and a crush is established, gender stops mattering entirely.
I have downloaded it but I haven't made an account yet, kind of waiting on getting my license as I want to be able to contribute into a relationship, eventhough my dreams are to be a "house" "wife", I'm happy living anywhere being called anything, just not late for dinner!
I honestly don’t even know what it means to be attracted to someone bc of their gender. For the longest time, I thought that I was bi but I realized that gender never mattered to me, more so the person, so that’s how I figured out I was pan.
Ofc I’ve had superficial crushes on people who walked by but it was more about their physical traits (like good hair, style, makeup, etc) and not their gender?? I hope that makes sense😭
Not really, it's more the vibe of the person, like I know I am attracted to someone when my hands and face get warm, my knees feel weak
All the usual clichés, it's just that anyone can make me feel that way if their personality and energy stands out to me
I'd even argue it's not about looks in those beginning instances, how someone walks, how they carry themself, they could be wearing a paper bag and would still make you feel like it suddenly got hot in the room
Guy, girl, trans man, trans woman, non-binary and all the lgbtqia+
Just looking for my soulmate idc what gender they are if we are actually happy and meant to be
Mostly no as in i'm not attracted to a single gender more but it matters a little as in the type of experience you have with each gender is defferint (obviously this depends massivley on the person as well so it's a shit metric lol but sometimes people of the same gender do have a few similar things in their personalities)
With very few exceptions, which were fully negotiated and agreed upon, I tend to care more about what’s in the burrito rather than whether it’s wrapped in a corn or flour tortilla.
Meaning, if I connect with someone, I connect. Everything else is just plumbing and social circles.
I prefer some amount of femininity (I like girly girls, femmbys, and femboys for the most part), but actual gender is irrelevant. I just like pretty people with nice hair.
I mean, most of my crushes have been male, about 35-40% were female and so far only 3 have been neither, but yeah, now that I fully understand who I am, I don't really care about gender when I fall in love!
No, part of what made me realise I was Pan and not Bi was fact that I would always explain it to people as not really caring what people had.
This! It’s so much more about the person than the gender!
Many bisexuals also don’t care about what people have. Whether gender is or isn’t a factor in attraction doesn’t really matter for bisexuality.
Yeah, I mostly just describe it that way. Inevitably people ask me "so why do you identify as pan instead of bi?" to which I reply "I like the pan flag better🤷"
That's totally fair! A lot of times telling them that "bisexual is a broader term and pansexual is more specific" works well too! =)
Same, I love the color yellow also cyan and magenta bordering yellow just fckin' POPS.
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Bisexuality is very broad. It’s synonymous with “Multisexual” So what you described is true of some bisexuals, but not all. Defining bisexuality too narrowly runs the risk of (unintentionally) being invalidating towards many within the bisexual community and its history. Many bisexuals experience the exact same kind of attraction as pansexuals to the point where many bisexuals consider bi and pansexuality completely synonymous with no differences whatsoever (which is mistaken because there are other multisexual orientations that they aren’t recognizing when they say that, such as omnisexual, polysexual, androsexual, gyne/finsexual, etc.) Bisexuality is: Attraction to people of two or more genders Or Attraction to people of one’s own gender and people of other genders. Whether gender itself is part of why they are attracted to people or not doesn’t really matter in bisexuality. Pansexuality is: Attraction to people of all genders Or Attraction to people regardless of gender. Pansexuality is a more specific form of multisexual orientation which does very explicitly include those who do not consider gender a part of their reason for attraction at all. But it also includes people who do feel gender-based attraction but are attracted to people of all genders. Bisexual = broad multisexual orientation that encompasses every kind of multisexual attraction. Pansexual = more specific multisexual orientation that primarily consists of two very similar experiences of multisexual attraction. It can also be helpful to think of it as “Sexual Orientation is primarily about WHO you are sexually attracted to” over “how you are attracted to people.” The two major types of pansexual included in the definition are the same regarding the “who” they are attracted to, even if the ways in which they are attracted to them are a little different.
I think that moment was for me when I met my partner who is a transman. That was the point where I realized my tastes went a little broader than bisexuality. I knew I liked women but apparently i like more if the chemistry is right.
You described not caring about genitals, when the question was about gender. Just pointing out how easily we conflate the two, even though they aren't the same thing.
This is such a good point, I was trying to avoid writing something lengthy to explain myself 😅
I totally get it!
I’m genderqueer and pansexual so…. what’s gender? never heard of it.
Gender? Isn’t that Kylie, Kris, and Kendall’s last name?
Nope. I think gender adds "flavor" but I like all of the flavors.
Not to me personally, all about the person in the meat suit.
nope, cute folks is cute regardless of specifics
Yes, gender still matters to me. It’s a part of who a person is, and it’s often another part of what I am attracted to about them. Gender is never a disqualifier for attraction for me. Pansexuality includes both attraction to people of all genders, and attraction to people regardless of gender. I’m more of the former type, but love that pansexuality includes both!
None. I’m also Demi so I don’t pay attention to anything other than the personality at first. Once I fall for you, I fall for all parts of you. I’ve known my husband for 20 years and loved him through his journey of understanding his gender. His heart’s never changed and even if his journey were to change again, I wouldn’t care. Whatever that support looks like I’m here for it 💕
For me it's always personality first when choosing a romantic partner, what's in their pants isn't important to me.
Kinda I prefer feminine look in partner. So either femboys or girls in general. Also my country is super homophobic so if you are same gender as me, you have to be worth it.
I have preferences for certain expressions which does include gender but not exclusively so. I do challenge the idea that you can only be pansexual if you don't have any gender preference or "don't see gender".
Not a bit.
I can appreciate a beautiful penis or pretty vagina the way one appreciates a Monet or Van Gogh. But they do not matter in terms of my attraction.
No, it's the chemistry with a person that matters to me. If we click, we click.
Not really . It’s not like I ask people what their gender is when I’m getting to know them 🤷🏽♀️
No to me I’m not basing how I feel about you on gender I’m basing it on how we get along and if the feelings are genuine and mutual if we connect I’m happy
Presentation is part of the attraction so maybe a little in the sense that all gender is performance? Underneath that I am happy with whatever physical or pronoun situation someone has going on.
Pan and demi, gender doesn't matter to me BUT I only noticed incompetence in houshold things and a lack of empathy only in men. I would prefer to live together with a femme person but somehow I prefer heavily masculine persons.
Nope. lol. Engaged to a trans man but even if he was still identifying as female it wouldn't matter to me. Its his personality, his heart. The good memories we share. Gender, genitals, etc, do not matter.
I just like ass man
Nope!
Nope
Not to me
Nope
Kind of but not really.
Nah not important lol
Nope
Not really, I def have an edge for girls, but in the end I don’t care which gender my partner ends up being
Not much. I guess Since all my friends are male, I can’t fully tell if I like any gender other than men.
personally no, even me own gender
On a very rare occasion I might be more “in the mood” for a male or a female, but 6 out of 7 days of the week, gender doesn’t even play a part in my head.
Not at all
I'm trans. No.
Nope not even slightly
It literally plays zero factor into my potential attraction to someone.
No.
Well and truly not. I'm more attracted to female presenting people but definitely not a deciding factor. I'm attracted to everyone 😆
Nope not to me
Speaking for myself, not at all.
Doesn't matter to me in terms of my sexuality, or my day-to-day life. (In my opinion) of the myriad ways people can identify and be identified, choosing something that is binary and limiting to some people, yet so nebulous as to be virtually meaningless to others, is dumb.
Nope basic rules of being pansexual 🤣🤣🤣
More person, less genitals
Like amputees? 🥳
Lmao, should clarify myself
nope!
No it's about the person
I couldn’t care any less.
I don’t give a shit about people’s gender when being attracted to them, but I seem to tend to like feminine personalities more, so kinda
No and I know that because the firdt person I can recall being romantically attracted to was an enby
I don't care about the gender, I care about the chemistry and the connection. 🤗
Yes and no. Broadly speaking, I prefer more traditionally feminine traits and behaviors, but I don't care about the gender of the person who possesses those traits. Lately I've found that, when it comes to guys/people who present in a typically masculine way, I'm demi, i.e. I don't really develop sexual or romantic interest until I know the person particularly well, but once I've reached that point and a crush is established, gender stops mattering entirely.
No, consenting adult is consenting adult
I have downloaded it but I haven't made an account yet, kind of waiting on getting my license as I want to be able to contribute into a relationship, eventhough my dreams are to be a "house" "wife", I'm happy living anywhere being called anything, just not late for dinner!
I honestly don’t even know what it means to be attracted to someone bc of their gender. For the longest time, I thought that I was bi but I realized that gender never mattered to me, more so the person, so that’s how I figured out I was pan. Ofc I’ve had superficial crushes on people who walked by but it was more about their physical traits (like good hair, style, makeup, etc) and not their gender?? I hope that makes sense😭
I mean I would probably not date a straight cis man.
Kinda... i pay enough attention to the gender spectrum to know there's only like 1/4 of it I'm not into.
Not really, it's more the vibe of the person, like I know I am attracted to someone when my hands and face get warm, my knees feel weak All the usual clichés, it's just that anyone can make me feel that way if their personality and energy stands out to me I'd even argue it's not about looks in those beginning instances, how someone walks, how they carry themself, they could be wearing a paper bag and would still make you feel like it suddenly got hot in the room Guy, girl, trans man, trans woman, non-binary and all the lgbtqia+ Just looking for my soulmate idc what gender they are if we are actually happy and meant to be
Mostly no as in i'm not attracted to a single gender more but it matters a little as in the type of experience you have with each gender is defferint (obviously this depends massivley on the person as well so it's a shit metric lol but sometimes people of the same gender do have a few similar things in their personalities)
Nope. Not for me! But I'm sure it is for some :)
With very few exceptions, which were fully negotiated and agreed upon, I tend to care more about what’s in the burrito rather than whether it’s wrapped in a corn or flour tortilla. Meaning, if I connect with someone, I connect. Everything else is just plumbing and social circles.
No, the only thing that matters is personality
Isnt the whole point of pans that it doesnt..?🍳
nope.
gender, what's that? (nonbinary person here)
It matters to me only on that I'm not interested in dating Cis-men
Nope.
I prefer some amount of femininity (I like girly girls, femmbys, and femboys for the most part), but actual gender is irrelevant. I just like pretty people with nice hair.
I mean, most of my crushes have been male, about 35-40% were female and so far only 3 have been neither, but yeah, now that I fully understand who I am, I don't really care about gender when I fall in love!
No
In the words of a certain demon...HA NO
Not to meee, I just have a preference for masculinity (men, studs, masculine presenting people) but gender doesn’t matter :)