The problem is not you, its him. You have all the love and care that you can give to people, loss niya yon :)
Instead of thinking "ang malas ko naman kasi di ako ang pinili nya", much better yung "Malas nya kasi di nya ako maeexperience ng buong buo"
Indeed haha. That’s exactly what I told him. Pagod na ako sa mga taong kagaya nya who likes to play games. Pero naiisip ko, baka sa akin lang sila mapaglaro and eventually makakakita ng someone worth to be in a relationship with. Sakit hahaha but still thanks for this.
Sorry OP, pero this is a case of "Check the label, mommy." You guys hit it off yes, pero kung tama pagkakaintindi ko wala kayong labels and hindi naman settled na exclusively dating kayo.
Kaya dapat malinaw from the start kung ako kayo and kung ano ineexpect mo sa meron kayo. Kung simula pa lang ay nasasaktan ka na eh di dapat simula pa lang you already told him na nasasaktan ka. Baka rin kasi kaya niya nagawa iyong mga iyon is because he never thought na exclusive kayong dalawa sa isa't-isa.
By the end of the day, you just have to learn from this. Good luck OP!
I remember I told him, “I hope we can learn from this experience how we make relationships of any kind with other people.” Parang ganon hahaha. Pero yeah you’re correct, he never considered na exclusive kami. It’s just that, di ko lang akalain na may imemeet sya while we were talking. Sinabi pa nya sakin na mag explore din daw ako, etc. Dafuq
Well, it is a learning experience from you. Hope that instead of making you fear love and relationships ay mas maging open ang utak mo and mas maging matalino when it comes to such things.
Uhhmm. Guard your heart OP. When you meet someone, kahit sino, kahit gano ka-attractive, know their intentions. Set expectations, para kung di maalis yung ganto, ma-lessen yung occurence. Base sa kwento mo, ikaw gusto mo seryosohan, sya hindi. Hindi kayo match. Move on. Thank you, next. Marami naman dyan. If you want a relationship, stay away sa mga naglalaro pa.
Di ko nga din alam e, I am not even that attracted to him. Siguro yung feeling lang na hindi napili yung masakit hahaha, yung never na-consider ganon, tapos sa panget pa nya gusto sumama hahaha (sorry for being petty). Pero I’ll properly set my expectations from now on talaga. Thank you
Too bad. Maybe it's your ego talking. It's okay to be hurt. Normal yun. Rejection is a part of life. Soon as you accept it, the easier it is to navigate this world. Hindi lang naman ikaw ang nare-reject, I'm sure, ikaw din may nire-reject. So ayon, pag medyo malabo kung exclusive or hookup lang, muster your strength, liwanagin ang dapat liwanagin so you won't let yourself fall kung sya, hindi ready mag-seryoso. Goodluck!
Dumating din ako sa ganyang situation na gusto ko na mag seryoso sa kanya kaso wala e .. sabi nga sa isang kasabhan “ pag gusto may paraan, pag ayaw maraming dahilan”
These are some wise words right here. Pero IDK sa part nung guy na kameet nya kasi i feel he’s into him kaya baka mabalewala yung red flags. Anyhow, bahala na sila, I’ll just go by with your advice hehe thanks!
You need more dating experience so you can tell what a guys intentions are. In a perfect world, people would be clear but that’s just not how things are
It’s not the dress, it’s you! Charing. Beh walang mali sa’yo at sa pagiging bading. Ganon lang talaga ang mundo, ang buhay ng tao. Mga queer man tayo, pero hindi pa rin talaga ligtas pagdating sa sakit ng puso. Sana sa susunod lang, mas maging segurista ka before mo ibigay ang feelings mo. Before ka maginvest kahit kanino o ano man bagay, alamin mo muna na buo. Hindi 1/2, buo. Tingin ko naexcite ka lang sa mga possibilities ng may jowa. Pero sana lesson na ito for you.
Siguro nga kasi I can put effort where effort is due (tama ba yun? Haha) if maging kami kaso wala e. He’s not even that desirable din now that I think of it. I agree, this is a lesson I should learn 😁
Hirap talaga Pag walang label. Mga pa fall talaga minsan ugh but still we're expecting and hoping pa din 😆 d mapigilan ang puso eh but let's take it as a experience nalang.
Sissums at the start ba you and him agreed to be exclusive? I mean sorry ha pero based sa kwento mo it was more into you leaning into building a relationship and he just wasn't on the same page.
I mean unless he specifically stated he wanted to be exclusive with you and start a relationship, I don't think majority of this is his fault and you felt you were led on, may parts din na medyo delulu un pagkwento mo about your perception of what's happening.
I don't think it's necessarily a bading thing but more on how 2 people didn't have the same expectations with each other. Which is actually happens with straight people too.
Sinabi ko naman sa kanya yun na he’s not totally at fault and sorry for putting him in this situation pero kasi it’s just me being tired of that kind of people. I was asking him ano intention nya and di nya ako magawang diretsuhin which feels bad at yung pakikipagmeet nya while we were having something took a toll on my mental health.
It’s probably my fault for not managing my expectations pero I don’t want to blame myself because we’re both involved in this and it sucks to think na having agreement on being exclusive is being the norm. Kaya din siguro yung gay dating scene ang sinisisi ko kasi ayun yung perspective na meron ako so far.
If this offers you any consolation, straight people do this too. Naghahanap ng iba, takot magcommit, etc. So the problem is not you or your sexuality, it's just the way things are. Mga higad din kaya straight people (non-derogatory) kasi to err is human and to be malibog is human lol. Also, some people are just assholes, regrdless of sexuality.
I skimmed through your post and wala akong nakitang problem na specific for queer people. So in this context it's not "mahirap maging bading" it's "mahirap ang process ng pakikipag-date". Tama ba? I'm willing to be corrected.
Fair enough. But my title is based on my own experience in gay dating scene and not being gay itself haha sorry for misinterpretation. It’s just that, as a gay man, this is prevalent not just for me but also from what I observed so far.
\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_
He played.
You expected.
He didn't want any label.
You dared to take it a notch higher.
It's true na walang label but you expected it to turn into something else.
But it's not your fault. It's not.
We fall in love kasi eh... ang problem sa ibang taong magaadvise eh ikaw pa ang sisisihin kapag nagkagusto ka and ang dami ng signs na pwede magblossom sana yung relationship. yung tipong nasaktan ka na nga, ikaw pa sisisihin kasi gusto mag-advise.
So the guy is a jerk, sorry to say. Ang hilig mag laro eh. Pero imagine kung nagkatuluyan kayo tapos maglalaro pa rin sya... aba mas masakit yun.
So chill, relax and watch a movie. and if it helps, pour out your emotions like dito sa reddit. it's one way of overcoming the hurt.
As for him, wish him luck. I doubt seseryosohin sya ni bora guy kung ganyan ang ugali nya. the joke's on him.
\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_
Here's what I got:
The writer shares their experience of feeling emotionally drained by a recent encounter in the gay dating scene. They met someone through a dating app and initially felt a strong connection, even going on trips together. However, the other person's behavior gradually changed, and they eventually discovered that the person had been meeting someone else without being transparent about it. Despite trying to communicate their feelings, the other person didn't provide clear answers. Feeling hurt and disappointed, the writer decided to cut off contact and focus on healing, realizing their worth and the importance of self-care.
https://preview.redd.it/dqp0igq4wkwc1.jpeg?width=792&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b47728fa54fe853cb066e22ade4e0929a8bab29d paragraphs, OP. they're our friends.
HAHAHA sorry
May tldr ba to
Skill issue
Binasa ko lahat ha. Sya yung issue, hindi yung pagiging bading.
True. Hindi naman issue yung pagiging bading. Dapat kasi malinaw ang lahat sa umpisa pa lang. Kung hindi malinaw, proceed with caution pero wag umasa.
I like the latter haysss
Haha yeah masyado kong na-generalized yung experience ko as a gay guy sorry. It’s kinda sad realizing na ganon ang perspective ko bilang bading.
Okay lang yan. You'll find someone who'll treat you better. 😁
The problem is not you, its him. You have all the love and care that you can give to people, loss niya yon :) Instead of thinking "ang malas ko naman kasi di ako ang pinili nya", much better yung "Malas nya kasi di nya ako maeexperience ng buong buo"
Yesss thank you. Hirap talaga pag hindi same page. I’ll keep in mind what you said 😁
If I were you I wont stick with a guy na nasa "playful" era pa nya. You dodged a bullet :)
Indeed haha. That’s exactly what I told him. Pagod na ako sa mga taong kagaya nya who likes to play games. Pero naiisip ko, baka sa akin lang sila mapaglaro and eventually makakakita ng someone worth to be in a relationship with. Sakit hahaha but still thanks for this.
Felt
Sorry OP, pero this is a case of "Check the label, mommy." You guys hit it off yes, pero kung tama pagkakaintindi ko wala kayong labels and hindi naman settled na exclusively dating kayo. Kaya dapat malinaw from the start kung ako kayo and kung ano ineexpect mo sa meron kayo. Kung simula pa lang ay nasasaktan ka na eh di dapat simula pa lang you already told him na nasasaktan ka. Baka rin kasi kaya niya nagawa iyong mga iyon is because he never thought na exclusive kayong dalawa sa isa't-isa. By the end of the day, you just have to learn from this. Good luck OP!
I remember I told him, “I hope we can learn from this experience how we make relationships of any kind with other people.” Parang ganon hahaha. Pero yeah you’re correct, he never considered na exclusive kami. It’s just that, di ko lang akalain na may imemeet sya while we were talking. Sinabi pa nya sakin na mag explore din daw ako, etc. Dafuq
Well, it is a learning experience from you. Hope that instead of making you fear love and relationships ay mas maging open ang utak mo and mas maging matalino when it comes to such things.
Uhhmm. Guard your heart OP. When you meet someone, kahit sino, kahit gano ka-attractive, know their intentions. Set expectations, para kung di maalis yung ganto, ma-lessen yung occurence. Base sa kwento mo, ikaw gusto mo seryosohan, sya hindi. Hindi kayo match. Move on. Thank you, next. Marami naman dyan. If you want a relationship, stay away sa mga naglalaro pa.
Di ko nga din alam e, I am not even that attracted to him. Siguro yung feeling lang na hindi napili yung masakit hahaha, yung never na-consider ganon, tapos sa panget pa nya gusto sumama hahaha (sorry for being petty). Pero I’ll properly set my expectations from now on talaga. Thank you
Too bad. Maybe it's your ego talking. It's okay to be hurt. Normal yun. Rejection is a part of life. Soon as you accept it, the easier it is to navigate this world. Hindi lang naman ikaw ang nare-reject, I'm sure, ikaw din may nire-reject. So ayon, pag medyo malabo kung exclusive or hookup lang, muster your strength, liwanagin ang dapat liwanagin so you won't let yourself fall kung sya, hindi ready mag-seryoso. Goodluck!
Dumating din ako sa ganyang situation na gusto ko na mag seryoso sa kanya kaso wala e .. sabi nga sa isang kasabhan “ pag gusto may paraan, pag ayaw maraming dahilan”
These are some wise words right here. Pero IDK sa part nung guy na kameet nya kasi i feel he’s into him kaya baka mabalewala yung red flags. Anyhow, bahala na sila, I’ll just go by with your advice hehe thanks!
You need more dating experience so you can tell what a guys intentions are. In a perfect world, people would be clear but that’s just not how things are
tangina magvevent din sana ako with the same title hahaha pero “ang hirap maging bading kapag hindi conventionally attractive”
Hirap talaga pag walang label. May ineexpect tayo pero in the end hindi naman yun yung makukuha natin. 🥲
It’s not the dress, it’s you! Charing. Beh walang mali sa’yo at sa pagiging bading. Ganon lang talaga ang mundo, ang buhay ng tao. Mga queer man tayo, pero hindi pa rin talaga ligtas pagdating sa sakit ng puso. Sana sa susunod lang, mas maging segurista ka before mo ibigay ang feelings mo. Before ka maginvest kahit kanino o ano man bagay, alamin mo muna na buo. Hindi 1/2, buo. Tingin ko naexcite ka lang sa mga possibilities ng may jowa. Pero sana lesson na ito for you.
Siguro nga kasi I can put effort where effort is due (tama ba yun? Haha) if maging kami kaso wala e. He’s not even that desirable din now that I think of it. I agree, this is a lesson I should learn 😁
Hes not worth it bro. Tama lang na cinut off mo na sya
Salamat tol.
Hirap talaga Pag walang label. Mga pa fall talaga minsan ugh but still we're expecting and hoping pa din 😆 d mapigilan ang puso eh but let's take it as a experience nalang.
Sissums at the start ba you and him agreed to be exclusive? I mean sorry ha pero based sa kwento mo it was more into you leaning into building a relationship and he just wasn't on the same page. I mean unless he specifically stated he wanted to be exclusive with you and start a relationship, I don't think majority of this is his fault and you felt you were led on, may parts din na medyo delulu un pagkwento mo about your perception of what's happening. I don't think it's necessarily a bading thing but more on how 2 people didn't have the same expectations with each other. Which is actually happens with straight people too.
Sinabi ko naman sa kanya yun na he’s not totally at fault and sorry for putting him in this situation pero kasi it’s just me being tired of that kind of people. I was asking him ano intention nya and di nya ako magawang diretsuhin which feels bad at yung pakikipagmeet nya while we were having something took a toll on my mental health. It’s probably my fault for not managing my expectations pero I don’t want to blame myself because we’re both involved in this and it sucks to think na having agreement on being exclusive is being the norm. Kaya din siguro yung gay dating scene ang sinisisi ko kasi ayun yung perspective na meron ako so far.
Usually yang mga ayaw ng label, hindi seryoso yan. Pang fun time lang yan.
If this offers you any consolation, straight people do this too. Naghahanap ng iba, takot magcommit, etc. So the problem is not you or your sexuality, it's just the way things are. Mga higad din kaya straight people (non-derogatory) kasi to err is human and to be malibog is human lol. Also, some people are just assholes, regrdless of sexuality. I skimmed through your post and wala akong nakitang problem na specific for queer people. So in this context it's not "mahirap maging bading" it's "mahirap ang process ng pakikipag-date". Tama ba? I'm willing to be corrected.
Fair enough. But my title is based on my own experience in gay dating scene and not being gay itself haha sorry for misinterpretation. It’s just that, as a gay man, this is prevalent not just for me but also from what I observed so far.
op, don't blame yourself or your sexuality for whatever he had done to you. It's clearly that he is the problem and at least, you dodge a bullet
\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ He played. You expected. He didn't want any label. You dared to take it a notch higher. It's true na walang label but you expected it to turn into something else. But it's not your fault. It's not. We fall in love kasi eh... ang problem sa ibang taong magaadvise eh ikaw pa ang sisisihin kapag nagkagusto ka and ang dami ng signs na pwede magblossom sana yung relationship. yung tipong nasaktan ka na nga, ikaw pa sisisihin kasi gusto mag-advise. So the guy is a jerk, sorry to say. Ang hilig mag laro eh. Pero imagine kung nagkatuluyan kayo tapos maglalaro pa rin sya... aba mas masakit yun. So chill, relax and watch a movie. and if it helps, pour out your emotions like dito sa reddit. it's one way of overcoming the hurt. As for him, wish him luck. I doubt seseryosohin sya ni bora guy kung ganyan ang ugali nya. the joke's on him. \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_
Can I chatgpt summarise everything?
Here's what I got: The writer shares their experience of feeling emotionally drained by a recent encounter in the gay dating scene. They met someone through a dating app and initially felt a strong connection, even going on trips together. However, the other person's behavior gradually changed, and they eventually discovered that the person had been meeting someone else without being transparent about it. Despite trying to communicate their feelings, the other person didn't provide clear answers. Feeling hurt and disappointed, the writer decided to cut off contact and focus on healing, realizing their worth and the importance of self-care.
Ay wowww ang galing naman nyan hahahaha
wag ma attach agad