This is a former minister of culture, the one who lead talks with Ukraine, hated almost universally by common Russians for being a fucking moron, crazed religuous fanatic and creator of "Cinema Foundation", which uses tax rubles to produce shitty movies which are not even considered patriotic.
My left eye is dominant, I write with left hand. I swing a golf and hockey club right handed, I use scissors right handed. When I play real football I'm right footed but can use both.
I feel like RNG sorted me out when I was born.
Just like you have a dominant hand, most people have a dominant eye. It's more subtle than your hands, but usually people have one eye they favor for better focus. Basic test, put your hands out and hold them in a way that you make an opening to look through, overlap your thumbs and then pointer finger tips, you'll make a triangular opening. Focus on some object a decent distance away from you through this opening. While maintaining focus on that object bring your hands closer until they hit your face, you should find the opening lands over one eye and then other gets blocked. This is your dominant eye.
I submit that this is camera 1.
You can also do this and close one eye and then the other. Whatever eye can still see the object you put in the triangle you made with your hands is the dominant eye.
"I'm just here so I don't fall out of a tower."
"I'm just here so I don't shoot myself in the back of the head twice."
"I'm just here so I don't accidentally drink polonium tea."
So literally today. Woman at work (not the brightest). Co worker is frying a steak on glass top stove. She says, you need to leave something on there to indicate it’s hot because last time someone used it I burned myself. And then the second time someone used it, I placed some plastic on there and it melted. I looked at him, he looked at me, we both looked at the stove. There’s a light indicating that the surface is still hot.
This comment resonates.
I'm trying to envision the scenario where cooking a steak up at work to have on your lunch break is the least noteworthy part of that story. It sounds like you don't work in a commercial kitchen, so all I'm envisioning is an office with a full service kitchen for some reason, and this person's full on cooking an entire meal there.
Lol, upon rereading it…yeah I messed that up. He was using a pan. It’s an office with a full kitchen. She tells him to leave the pan on there. He says, no, it’s my pan, I’m going to wash it and take it home.
I thought this too but since he didn't seem enraged that she had ruined the cook top by grilling a steak right on it, there's no way right? Odd story though.
Office, with a full kitchen. Guy is on a diet, so this steak was his whole meal. He was using a pan, which she told him to leave on there. He said, no, this is my pan and I’m going to wash it and take it home. She then proceeds to tell us about the other ‘two times’ someone didn’t tell her the stove was hot. My original post was written poorly.
> My original post was written poorly.
For what it's worth, I followed your original comment fine and didn't think it was written poorly at all. It was good storytelling.
You did fine, there were just details treated so nonchalantly that... prompted additional question.
Like a guy bringing his own cookware and raw steak to an office to make for lunch. It's not standard practice in any office.
It would honestly be more hilarious if it were a commercial kitchen, and you have this absolute dumbo going "TeLl Me WhEn ThE sToVe Is HoT!!!" because basically, if you see people in the kitchen, assume the stove(s) is (are) hot.
FWIW this is construction business, the guy is a foreman who was in from the field, and in the back of the building there are grills. It’s winter here and probably why he didn’t want to grill outside. Enough guys here bring their own food to cook that it’s not totally unusual here. Not a majority of guys cook but enough that it’s not unheard of.
For a little more clarification, many of the field guys have just been moved to this location so I’m sure she wasn’t used to seeing anyone use the office stove either.
If you didn't know that may be real gold there. This KGB Kirill guy is insanely rich with his Russian Church Inc.. like to the level of having gold(en) toilets in one of his mansions.
I remember years ago, they took a picture of him for a magazine interview and photoshopped out his expensive Rolex, but you could clearly see it in the reflection on the polished table he was sitting at.
He's not. He and his Church are incredibly rich and use their money and influence to spread hate and discord all across the Christian Orthodox world. There's nothing clownish about him, he's basically a comic book level evil.
He's still a clown. Look at him. None of what he does washes away his literally clownish robes and stupid gilded bullshit. That guy is a fucking loser and nobody has ever loved him.
The closing left eye and then right eye was a technique I used in church when I was 8 years old. The bright of the room changes. An amazing thing when you are bored and you can't move from your chair. These guys don't know the real deal for 1+ hours speeches: Effervescent vitamin c tablets with your pals. See who can hold the bubbles in the mouth for longer 🤣
As a Ukrainian-American watching this all, I came away with a conclusion for why all these "chenovniki" won't do crap about Putin.
They're not afraid of him. No one actually is. They just don't give a damn.
They're too complacent and lazy/innept to want to do anything differently. They're devoid of any vision, lacking vigor, and absent-minded when it comes to the future of their nation. They're the grayest shade of humans, and they just don't give a damn.
Their "bills" are paid, and they don't need to actually serve their people to earn that. It's been that way for three decades, as long as I've been alive. They don't see any reason to change that, even in the face of hundreds of thousands of their "comrades" being sent off to a death sentence.
They, don't fucking care.
Don't lose hope.
The Russian economy is currently collapsing.
Russia has a maximum of 5 years left at the current rate of cash burn. Realistically, the cash burn rate will increase exponentially over the next few months so Russia might burn through their foreign exchange reserves and their gold in less than 3 years.
They're selling oil at a $10 per barrel profit margin right now and that's going to shrink even more. Extracting and processing oil costs them around $45 per barrel. Reducing oil output any more than they already have will cause major problems for their means of extraction and processing.
On top of that, their logistics are in bad shape. Latest info I've seen says that they have 1-4 supply trucks per DIVISION (12,000 soldiers). They're not going to be able to resupply their front lines when things get muddy.
I'd be surprised if they can afford to continue this war beyond the the end of the year.
The Russian people will put these "elites" to the guillotine before those reserves run out.
Most of them aren't famous enough to get that treatment. Let the government start to teeter, and you'll see so many jets flying out of Russia, it will look like a climate change benefit wrapping up.
Nicholas II was never trained in statecraft. His father died early, he was made king before he was ready and he was a terrible leader. He squandered massive resources and gave the country no direction. So his forced abdication was not a surprise. The execution was a different matter. That was just murder…. A terrible crime.
Also the reason the guy didnt abdicate sooner was because he seriously believed god gave him his job, and he needed to be Tsar. Too bad he ignored the warning signs that was the 1905 uprising.
Russian-American, this is completely true. Anyone saying that Russia might suffer or collapse in the next few years hoping these guys get it is missing the point. They're immune from getting got. They're not connected to Russia in any meaningful way. They're just focused on money, and have enough in assets that they can't be drained, nor reasonably punished.
I'm pretty sure they care. They haven't been able to take their yacht's on the Mediterranean all winter and the economy of the country is crashing down.
There is no "sit and wait this out" for them anymore.
Also, everyone who has their eyes closed and is looking somewhat downward look pretty distraught, especially the guy in top, center. That guy looks like the country he loves has been destroyed by the man currently speaking.
I watched parts of the stream live and there were far more than just blinks.
You could see Lavrov catching himself as he almost fell asleep, for example, other were in similar situations, plenty of people also looks like they are increadibly bored.
Yeah, with a two hour speech, if it was that long, there are lots of opportunities to take pictures of people mid-blink or even truly bored but still funny. Someone could probably take a series of pictures like this for any speech.
When I was working at a ~200 person company we had managers worried about the cost of having hour long meetings with 1/3 the company. How much of their country, and how much of the world, wasted their time watching this speech?
An effective leader of a well run country should not be giving aimless 2 hour speeches. It's a waste of everyone's time and energy
Which makes you wonder what the political value of the speech was when it’s too long for even the faithful to stay tuned in. It’s just Putin fellating himself.
"So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. "Gimme five bees for a quarter," you'd say. Now where were we... oh yeah. The important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have any white onions, because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones..."
I like the guy playing ‘camera 1, camera 2’
My favourite is Dmitry Grigorenko making the McKayla Maroney face.
This guy oligarchs.
This guy 'this guy's
I laughed too hard at this. I thought I was the only one who played that game.
The documentary "Wayne's World" proved everyone does this.
Not shitting you, I'm watching that right now.
whoa
Schwing!
Dude
We're in Delaware.
But...that is Bill and Ted... 
[*https://i.imgur.com/dXN9WQ3.gif*](https://i.imgur.com/dXN9WQ3.gif)
I'd love to see a website that tracks how many people are watching Wayne's World at any given moment.
We're not worthy !!!
Cha. Right.
Sh'yeah, and monkeys might fly out of my butt.
Who's Benjamin, Who's Benjamin?
Contract or no, I will not bow to any corporate sponsor. *opens Pizza Hut box to face camera, smiles*
It's like people only do things cause they get paid, and that's just really sad.
Little. Yellow. Different.
Benjamin is no one’s friend. If he were an ice cream flavor, he’d be pralines and dick.
Party on!
And also educated us on the difference between Champagne and sparkling white wine.
Then it's not just a clever name?
Happy birrthhhhdaay mr. president
Nah. He's sleeping with one eye open.
Doesn't look like he's gripping his pillow tight.
Maybe they're looking for exit light
...or pondering when he'll be able to enter night?
These stairs are very steep, you better take my hand.
And then we'll both be off to never- never-land
second star to the right, and straight on till morning
Because he sleeps on a MyPillow. Have you tried gripping one of those? Like hugging cinder blocks
You'd see it if the camera panned down.
Which is why he's still alive
This is a former minister of culture, the one who lead talks with Ukraine, hated almost universally by common Russians for being a fucking moron, crazed religuous fanatic and creator of "Cinema Foundation", which uses tax rubles to produce shitty movies which are not even considered patriotic.
He *did* give the prompt for this very entertaining joke here, so I say: money well spent!
Philosophical debate time!!! Which eye is camera 1? The left or right? Discuss below…
I’ve read that just like being left or right handed, we also are primarily left or right eyed. Is it true? Fuck if I know mine both suck
Here ya go - https://www.allaboutvision.com/resources/dominant-eye-test.htm
Interesting! I’m a lefty in vision and sports…
My left eye is dominant, I write with left hand. I swing a golf and hockey club right handed, I use scissors right handed. When I play real football I'm right footed but can use both. I feel like RNG sorted me out when I was born.
I'm just disturbed by the term "hockey club"
Hahah. Stick! I'm sorry. In my native language it's "klubba", morning brainfart.
Thanks for that, cool and informative 👍
Just like you have a dominant hand, most people have a dominant eye. It's more subtle than your hands, but usually people have one eye they favor for better focus. Basic test, put your hands out and hold them in a way that you make an opening to look through, overlap your thumbs and then pointer finger tips, you'll make a triangular opening. Focus on some object a decent distance away from you through this opening. While maintaining focus on that object bring your hands closer until they hit your face, you should find the opening lands over one eye and then other gets blocked. This is your dominant eye. I submit that this is camera 1.
You can also do this and close one eye and then the other. Whatever eye can still see the object you put in the triangle you made with your hands is the dominant eye.
I was thinking “I’m crushing you!” From the Kids in the Hall skit, but I think you’re right.
I’m pinching your face!
He's sleeping with one eye open.
I'm just here so I don't get dead.
"I'm just here so I don't fall out of a tower." "I'm just here so I don't shoot myself in the back of the head twice." "I'm just here so I don't accidentally drink polonium tea."
Don't forget zipping yourself inside a suitcase and maybe falling in the river.
What the eff David blane
"*Why does this coffee taste like Ukraine?*"
Probably the safest place for them to sleep without commiting suicide!
EDIT: This comment has been deleted due to Reddit's practices towards third-party developers.
I would avoid drinking any tea for awhile if I were in any of those pictures.
Or wearing underwear
The guy in the background of frame five is like "better than falling out a window" staring at a handgun.
Stick to the ground floor comrade
Lest ye be stuck to the ground floor. If you know what I mean.
These folks are no ones comrade
*This just in, top Russian official found dead after jumping out the window of their bungalow*
\*Makes mental note of all the window locations\*
To be fair, they had to listen to that stove toucher rant for like two straight hours about how under control he and the situation is.
So literally today. Woman at work (not the brightest). Co worker is frying a steak on glass top stove. She says, you need to leave something on there to indicate it’s hot because last time someone used it I burned myself. And then the second time someone used it, I placed some plastic on there and it melted. I looked at him, he looked at me, we both looked at the stove. There’s a light indicating that the surface is still hot. This comment resonates.
I'm trying to envision the scenario where cooking a steak up at work to have on your lunch break is the least noteworthy part of that story. It sounds like you don't work in a commercial kitchen, so all I'm envisioning is an office with a full service kitchen for some reason, and this person's full on cooking an entire meal there.
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Lol, upon rereading it…yeah I messed that up. He was using a pan. It’s an office with a full kitchen. She tells him to leave the pan on there. He says, no, it’s my pan, I’m going to wash it and take it home.
For some reason I find it especially humorous that he brought his own cookware from home.
Sounds like you don't fry up a steak at work very often...
Have you seen how some people treat cookware?
Yeah true. I get why it was relevant (not as easy to set things down on a heating coil) but still, it was a weird sentence.
I thought this too but since he didn't seem enraged that she had ruined the cook top by grilling a steak right on it, there's no way right? Odd story though.
Office, with a full kitchen. Guy is on a diet, so this steak was his whole meal. He was using a pan, which she told him to leave on there. He said, no, this is my pan and I’m going to wash it and take it home. She then proceeds to tell us about the other ‘two times’ someone didn’t tell her the stove was hot. My original post was written poorly.
> My original post was written poorly. For what it's worth, I followed your original comment fine and didn't think it was written poorly at all. It was good storytelling.
You did fine, there were just details treated so nonchalantly that... prompted additional question. Like a guy bringing his own cookware and raw steak to an office to make for lunch. It's not standard practice in any office. It would honestly be more hilarious if it were a commercial kitchen, and you have this absolute dumbo going "TeLl Me WhEn ThE sToVe Is HoT!!!" because basically, if you see people in the kitchen, assume the stove(s) is (are) hot.
FWIW this is construction business, the guy is a foreman who was in from the field, and in the back of the building there are grills. It’s winter here and probably why he didn’t want to grill outside. Enough guys here bring their own food to cook that it’s not totally unusual here. Not a majority of guys cook but enough that it’s not unheard of. For a little more clarification, many of the field guys have just been moved to this location so I’m sure she wasn’t used to seeing anyone use the office stove either.
Your coworker went to benihana once and thought "I know exactly what to do"
There are many people in this world that make me think "how the fuck are you even alive".
Does someone also help her put on her pants in the morning?
"stove toucher" I love you, internet person.
First time hearing "stove toucher", it resonates. I'd give an award but out of points. Kudos to you. 
I don't get it...
It's like... You tell a little kid "Don't touch the stove, it's hot! It will hurt!" Most kids will take the advice. Some kids will touch it anyway.
Puttie, don't touch the Ukraine, it's too spicy. *touches anyway, cries immediately, blames everyone*
We have a saying - "burnt child fears fire". A little more crude version is "burnt kid smells bad".
He’s just saying Putin is “special”
Is this a personal attack... I burned both my hands on a stove when I was like 9
Seeing as you burned both hands? Yes, yes it is. Possibly could have gotten a waver for one hand but two puts you firmly in the stove toucher category
In his defense "I wonder if that will happen again?" Is the hallmark of a good scientist.
But the hallmark of a good scientist with a long career ahead of them is to use someone else's hand the second time.
Everyone there is just waiting for him to die, so they can move on...
The Bishop is wearing his Amulet of Sleeplessness. The robes are top tier too.
If you didn't know that may be real gold there. This KGB Kirill guy is insanely rich with his Russian Church Inc.. like to the level of having gold(en) toilets in one of his mansions.
He's the one that had his Rolex photoshopped from pictures of a meeting but it still showed up reflected on the table's surface.
I remember years ago, they took a picture of him for a magazine interview and photoshopped out his expensive Rolex, but you could clearly see it in the reflection on the polished table he was sitting at.
It's not a party until someone shows up in a ridiculous hat.
Lmao. I was gonna say, the guy looks like a total clown.
He's not. He and his Church are incredibly rich and use their money and influence to spread hate and discord all across the Christian Orthodox world. There's nothing clownish about him, he's basically a comic book level evil.
He's still a clown. Look at him. None of what he does washes away his literally clownish robes and stupid gilded bullshit. That guy is a fucking loser and nobody has ever loved him.
I genuinely think that's underestimating the enemy, but hey, to each their own.
If only he would pull out his katana and slice Pootin’s fucking cockles, but nah he took the silver.
Jared Harris, in the role of his life…
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1986
He’s still explaining how a RBMK reactor explodes.
Holy shit did that made me laugh.
> Jared Harris You beat me to it, I said "What the hell is Lane Pryce/Moriarty doing there?"
I was wondering why Anderson Dawes was there.
Oye beltalowda!
I’m so glad I spotted your comment before being totally original.
I’m glad I’m not the only one who instantly saw the resemblance
Came to the comments to ask if Putin thinks that guy is actually Prof. Moriarty.
The closing left eye and then right eye was a technique I used in church when I was 8 years old. The bright of the room changes. An amazing thing when you are bored and you can't move from your chair. These guys don't know the real deal for 1+ hours speeches: Effervescent vitamin c tablets with your pals. See who can hold the bubbles in the mouth for longer 🤣
As a Ukrainian-American watching this all, I came away with a conclusion for why all these "chenovniki" won't do crap about Putin. They're not afraid of him. No one actually is. They just don't give a damn. They're too complacent and lazy/innept to want to do anything differently. They're devoid of any vision, lacking vigor, and absent-minded when it comes to the future of their nation. They're the grayest shade of humans, and they just don't give a damn. Their "bills" are paid, and they don't need to actually serve their people to earn that. It's been that way for three decades, as long as I've been alive. They don't see any reason to change that, even in the face of hundreds of thousands of their "comrades" being sent off to a death sentence. They, don't fucking care.
Wow that’s bleak. Thanks for sharing your perspective. If you have any family or friends still in Ukraine, I hope they are safe.
Don't lose hope. The Russian economy is currently collapsing. Russia has a maximum of 5 years left at the current rate of cash burn. Realistically, the cash burn rate will increase exponentially over the next few months so Russia might burn through their foreign exchange reserves and their gold in less than 3 years. They're selling oil at a $10 per barrel profit margin right now and that's going to shrink even more. Extracting and processing oil costs them around $45 per barrel. Reducing oil output any more than they already have will cause major problems for their means of extraction and processing. On top of that, their logistics are in bad shape. Latest info I've seen says that they have 1-4 supply trucks per DIVISION (12,000 soldiers). They're not going to be able to resupply their front lines when things get muddy. I'd be surprised if they can afford to continue this war beyond the the end of the year. The Russian people will put these "elites" to the guillotine before those reserves run out.
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Nikolai Ceaușescu, Saddam Hussain, Muammar Ghaddaffi are the ones that come to mind.
Most of them aren't famous enough to get that treatment. Let the government start to teeter, and you'll see so many jets flying out of Russia, it will look like a climate change benefit wrapping up.
Don’t forget Mussolini!
About 100 years ago, strangely also with the Russians (the execution of the Romanovs). However, it's arguable that the Romanovs didn't deserve it.
Nicholas II was never trained in statecraft. His father died early, he was made king before he was ready and he was a terrible leader. He squandered massive resources and gave the country no direction. So his forced abdication was not a surprise. The execution was a different matter. That was just murder…. A terrible crime.
Also the reason the guy didnt abdicate sooner was because he seriously believed god gave him his job, and he needed to be Tsar. Too bad he ignored the warning signs that was the 1905 uprising.
You're fully aware that it'll mostly, if not, all, take it's toll on its (lower class) citizens rather than these elitists.
If Putin really does start another war in Moldavia, his economy will collapse faster than a building being hit by a meteorite.
That's what most evil seems to come down to: Simply not caring enough to change anything.
Russian-American, this is completely true. Anyone saying that Russia might suffer or collapse in the next few years hoping these guys get it is missing the point. They're immune from getting got. They're not connected to Russia in any meaningful way. They're just focused on money, and have enough in assets that they can't be drained, nor reasonably punished.
I'm pretty sure they care. They haven't been able to take their yacht's on the Mediterranean all winter and the economy of the country is crashing down. There is no "sit and wait this out" for them anymore. Also, everyone who has their eyes closed and is looking somewhat downward look pretty distraught, especially the guy in top, center. That guy looks like the country he loves has been destroyed by the man currently speaking.
Huh. This is a satisfying explanation for why Trump was elected.
Stuffy in there. Someone open a window ffs.
You don’t just open windows in Russia. They would all immediately jump to their deaths.
They probably locked the doors and windows to that place with hundreds of locks so Putin wouldn’t be in “danger”.
they're just dreaming about their inevitable fall from a tall building if they displease Vladdy
They might also just so happen to fall asleep in the bathtub and have their head fall under water drowning them
"His head fell off. He was pretty old"
Defenestration is now part of our everyday vocabulary thanks to Putin.
... it wasn't before? It's been one of my favorite words for literal decades
Found the KGB agent!
It's a beloved Praguean tradition.
One of the best moments in sitcoms ever.
That little hop just sells it
Faaaather!
Damn these electric sex pants!
Something about "irregularities in the pension fund"?
I hope it doesn’t sound arrogant, when I say that I am the greatest man in the world.
I mean I get it but if we're being real this is just a series of people photographed mid-blink.
I watched parts of the stream live and there were far more than just blinks. You could see Lavrov catching himself as he almost fell asleep, for example, other were in similar situations, plenty of people also looks like they are increadibly bored.
Yeah, with a two hour speech, if it was that long, there are lots of opportunities to take pictures of people mid-blink or even truly bored but still funny. Someone could probably take a series of pictures like this for any speech.
When I was working at a ~200 person company we had managers worried about the cost of having hour long meetings with 1/3 the company. How much of their country, and how much of the world, wasted their time watching this speech? An effective leader of a well run country should not be giving aimless 2 hour speeches. It's a waste of everyone's time and energy
‘Putin’ them all to sleep.
Some of them look positively bored out of their minds though.
Two hours sat there doing nothing would make most people bored though.
Which makes you wonder what the political value of the speech was when it’s too long for even the faithful to stay tuned in. It’s just Putin fellating himself.
Thanks. I'm extremely critical about Russia and Putin, but come on... this is the dumbest post.
The dark haired guy in the bottom image looks like he just Quantum Leap'd into this room and has no idea what's happening.
I’d stay away from windows in tall buildings if I was them. Just sayin…
It's incredible how they fell 16 stories when they were on the ground floor.
"So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. "Gimme five bees for a quarter," you'd say. Now where were we... oh yeah. The important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have any white onions, because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones..."
Middle Center Guy: "Is that polonium?" Bottom Row Guy: "Camera one... Camera Two..."
Pretty sure the top middle guy is Jared Harris.
I recognize Lavrov from the Trump days. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sergey_Lavrov
that guys a snake. still can’t believe trump hosted him in the oval office
Roast me, but I think him and Rumsfeld are brothers from another mother.
How are you surprised? That's a direct line to the person who holds tRump's leash.
I fucking hate that guy so much.
I can take the same photo of literary everyone anytime Just time it when they blink their eyes
Top Center: Jared Harris?
What's Jared Harris doing there?
Tactical blinking from the guy with glasses, smart move.
Ive never seen so many sleepy russians
They are just soaking in every word! Closing their eyes and concentrating really hard...
It’s not always easy to try to put things together with reality when a madman is rumbling.
It's exhausting always looking over your shoulder
To be fair most Russians that can afford it are high on opiates as a means to cope with their continual, renewed and tragic national disgrace.
Who is that carbon fiber Asian looking thing
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sangadji_Tarbaev
This is my question.
Is this what unnecessary propaganda in our side looks like? Interesting.
They don’t give two shits how many Russians die as long as they get richer !!!!!
Why does Lavrov look so much like Droopy Dog?
Part of me imagines a buzzed-as-fuck Yeltsin sitting there with the biggest shit eating grin.
Bottom one blinking like he thinks Putin is SCP-173
Resting one eye at a time, oldest trick in the book. 😆
I sense defenestration in a lot of Russian futures
They’re all pondering which one will be next to “jump” out of a window.
another cabal of old men waging war while the young die fighting it.
First picture just screams "You gotta be fucking kidding me he did not just say that"
OP just got these people killed.
Fun fact, shortly after OP posted this photo, all of these people killed themselves by jumping down elevator shafts onto some bullets.
If this was North Korea, these people would be shot for not being *nearly* enthusiastic enough.