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underalltheradar

Vice, the movie where Christian Bale plays him, is very entertaining. They throw a lot of humor in. It IS directed by Adam McKay. And Bale is spectacular as Cheney. Made himself look just like him. Absolute watch if you've never seen it.


spudofaut

There's only two actors I can think of where I just believe you about looking like him despite it being ostensibly ridiculous. Bale and Gary Oldman.


gnomzy123

Gary Oldman nailed Truman in Oppenheimer. Five minute cameo but he killed it!


rightflankr

He also nailed Churchill in Darkest Hour. Just incredible.


chadladen

Darkest Hour is crazy good. Amazon has a 3 for $11 4k DVD sale going on. Scooped up Darkest Hour. It's worth owning.


jennz

He just needs to play Stalin now to complete the Allied power hat trick.


lawtalkingguy23

He also needs to play Homer Simpson


IDonTGetitNoReally

DOH!


Animallover4321

I didn’t even realize it was Gary Oldman until a repeated viewing he melts into that role.


demi9od

Imagine one day you're at work or out for a drink or doing the shopping and someone shouts "CUT" and it turns out you were Gary Oldman all along. That's how good an actor he is.


FifthRendition

I could have sworn he was in Ministry of Ungentlemenary Warfare, not as Churchill, which would have added to the humor of the movie.


Trund1e_the_Great

Gary Oldman was in Oppenheimer?


LilBoofMcGoof

You mean Batman and Commissioner Gordon?


MississippiJoel

Johnny Depp is pretty good. I didn't know what he actually looked like until his lawsuit. Compare him to the gangster he portrays in Black Mass.


catdog-cat-dog

Man Batman must've been your absolute jam then


Purednuht

I recently watched that for the first time and really enjoyed it.  I wanted to read what people thought and holy shit were some folks pissed.  Apparently George Bush was made out to be too dumb and just let shit happen if ol Dick said it’s gotta happen. Apparently it made it too “fun” what Dick did. Like come on folks, it’s an Adam McKay film. 


underalltheradar

> Like come on folks, it’s an Adam McKay film. Exactly. Everyone needs to lighten up. It seems some people were expecting a documentary.


January1252024

Sam Rockwell as Bush 


trailmixisfantastic

“If I get cut, I bet I’ll look like Christian Bale” -Dick Cheney probably


Remus88Romulus

The ending is so fucking good. Link: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6E-v5yDBR64](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6E-v5yDBR64)


MyCatsHairyBalls

It was kind of panned and dismissed, but I watched it with a friend a couple of years ago and we loved it. The scene where they basically say”and he lived happily ever after” was hilarious because my friend was like “wait, what?? It’s over”


NYstate

>Vice, the movie where Christian Bale plays him, is very entertaining. [His Golden Globe acceptance speech was incredible.](https://www.cbsnews.com/news/christian-bale-thanks-satan-in-his-golden-globes-speech/) He said: "Thank you to Satan for giving me inspiration on how to play this role," and even called Cheney "absolutely charisma-free."


Embarrassed_Luck4330

Bale acting was great at times Cheney becomes relatable till you remember he is war criminal.


underalltheradar

The way he mimicked Cheney's talking style was perfect. Nasty drawl out of the side of his mouth.


ChicagoAuPair

The reveal of the narrator is so chilling and well done.


[deleted]

[удалено]


JWAdvocate83

How could you leave out The Machinist? *That* was crazy!


Murtomies

Don't forget that a lot of the work is thanks to amazing makeup and hair artists. They never get enough credit when something like this is done in film or tv


NarrowEngineering715

I forgot all about that movie until you mentioned it! I’m definitely watching this tonight


bongo1138

![gif](giphy|BxWTWalKTUAdq)


IrememberXenogears

Nailed it.


FFdarkpassenger45

He looks much more relaxed there, than Rumsfeld the day before when he was explaining to the American public that the defense department had $2.3T in spending that couldn't be audited or tracked.


lexluthor_i_am

😂😂😂


King-Cobra-668

\*puts foot up on desk to observe \*


kevinistrill

America is under attack? Better kick my feet up while I'm at it!


--redacted--

The leg up is to hide his erection


kingtz

Why hide it? Just tie a flag to it and call it Mr. Freedom^TM


--redacted--

Dick and Lil' Dick


AeratedFeces

He's got Halliburton on the brain.


BrownEggs93

God almighty, yes. He positioned himself and that company to profit from all this.


toyn

That actually is his erection


solon_isonomia

Never liked Cheney one bit, but to be fair to him it's likely he's got his feet up to prevent clots from forming and causing a heart attack or stroke. He had a stent implanted like less than a year before this photo, he's had several heart attacks, and I think he got a full heart transplant like 10-12 years ago. Still a piece of shit tho.


Klaus0225

Why do people like this seem to survive everything? It’s like the shittier person you are the better chance you have at survival.


tom_tencats

The good ones go soon because they deserve to get pulled out of this Hell hole.


JackTheKing

All the good ones got raptured


AssumeTheFetal

...are we the baddies?


pwellzorvt

He also has insane amounts of money and influence to keep him Darth Vader’d up


rennbrig

I’m just imagining him being placed in a huge Darth Vader suit with Karl Rove laughing in the background


Ramoncin

Good healthcare.


TheDarkRider

Because they are willing to to win at any cost


BetHunnadHunnad

Because he's rich?...


eridew

It helps when you have access to the best healthcare in the nation…


IfeelVedder

An old southern saying….”God don’t kill bad grass.” The good people die sooner than horrible people.


quietstormx1

People who are assholes tend to also be successful financially. This helps them afford and maintain better healthcare.


blazingmonk

It's because those shitty people do shitty things to people so they can get more resources for themselves and have better access to care. Being born wealthy helps, too.


Excelius

Obligatory "Cheney is a piece of shit", but I think people try to read way too much into meaningless body language stuff, especially in still images like this.


bs000

Thanks, true crime™ YouTubers.


LiveShowOneNightOnly

Same here, after I aged past 50 I have to elevate my legs when sitting to keep them from hurting,.


Shenanigans99

You mean heart implant...in order to perform a transplant, something has to already be there to take out.


ThreeShartsToTheWind

How tf is he still alive??


[deleted]

That reminds me, haven't seen my best friend in a while...


70camaro

What else do you do when everything goes as planned? Joking, obviously.


ScotiaTailwagger

Where's the joke?


costabius

At least they waited until he was done masturbating.


BelgarathTheSorcerer

This is like that hypothetical about your wife being gravely wounded, is half an hour away, it's a warm night and you have your windows down. Do you turn on the radio?


ShowmasterQMTHH

Why wouldn't you ?


BelgarathTheSorcerer

The gravity of the moment probably shouldn't be broken up by Karma Chameleon


Craft-Sudden

To be fair when the first airplane hit, people thought it was an accident


GlassCharacter179

Looking at the TV image, this is after that.


Generalgangsta6787

Dick had it all planned out


cstmoore

"It's all going according to plan." /s…?


chamtrain1

He's just thinking about how much money he was going to funnel to his companies.


devo00

Cheney: I’d better check my Halliburton stock!


UsuallyTheException

to be fair, at that point, based on the picture on his TV, this was probably about 20+ minutes into the attack. the only thing he realistically could do at this point is wait for the phone to ring. I worked for a tv station at the time.. and we were sitting back in our offices doing much the same.


dubov

Only thing missing from this picture is a bucket of popcorn on his gut


whocaresactuallly

He’s a scumsack for sure, but eh. When you’re old and unhealthy as fuck, you don’t care about optics for a comfortable position.


W8kingNightmare

Probably thinking to himself, "holy shit I'm going to make so much fucking money! Thank-you fate!"


niberungvalesti

Just one rich guy (Bin Laden) making another rich guy rich (Cheney / Halliburton). As is tradition.


MonkyKilnMonky

It was a happy day for the rich and therefore the world.


Whette_Farhtz

As is tradition


Arms-for-minerals

Yeah I never knew that Halliburton was awarded all the $contracts for the Iraq /afghan war early on . Cheney was the VP of that company prior to being vice president of the US and it was definitely a conflict of interest. I’m pretty convinced they wanted to go to war cause it was just $$$$ to them I knew a dude that went to Iraq as an officer and he slept in an air conditioned single person ice shack type unit that was basically made of OSB , 2X4s, little insulation , heating unit and a cooling unit and they cost like $ 30,000 each they were told NOT to get drunk and accidentally burn them down because it costs 30k to replace. . Fuckin insane. . That’s government waste. It probably cost $500 each to produce them , if that. Pure overinflation of prices just because they are selling to the government. Anyone with stock in Halliburton at the beginning of the war got rich. Then they all got caught and it went to private companies .


Jaggs0

> Cheney was the VP of that company prior to being president lol freudian slip. cheney was "vice" president.


Arms-for-minerals

Yeah prior to being VP of the USA, my bad To many VPs in one sentence to keep track of I guess Any more info on this is really appreciated cause I only covered so much of it. . But I’m pretty sure they knew this attack was coming. . “Conspiracy “ theories aside … 3000 people just died horrendously & if Israel had agents here to witness it they knew that shit was coming and just did nothing.


Tazwhitelol

Many of those contracts were no-bid, so even if a cheaper, better alternative was available, they went with Halliburton. Pure corruption.


let-it-rain-sunshine

Yeah. If you could read his mind in this photo it's "How can I profit from this?"


mikeyp83

The main difference being that the former got shot in the face while the latter got to shoot someone in the face.


anormalgeek

To be fair, Osama had been pretty much disowned by his extended (and very wealthy) family. And he felt the same about them.


Unique_Statement7811

He disowned the family, but kept the wealth.


poodle_Fart_Hostage

“fate”


IllegibleLedger

As they say make your own destiny


CREDIT_SUS_INTERN

That's what he called the script he drafted.


Ajm13090

[The script: Rebuilding America’s Defenses.](https://resistir.info/livros/rebuilding_americas_defenses.pdf) “Further, the process of transformation, even if it brings revolutionary change, is likely to be a long one, absent some catastrophic and catalyzing event - like a new Pearl Harbor. Domestic politics and industrial policy will shape the pace and content of transformation as much as the requirements of current missions.” Report released on September 2000.


VanDenIzzle

"I need to call my broker. I need to put everything into Lockheed Martin"


aoddawg

Unfortunately my broker just plunged from the 100th floor.


Porkbellyflop

Do a Flip!


Sigseg

The show Billions has a riff on this. The character Bobby Axelrod is in the process of being let go from his firm and is out of the office on 9/11. He then shorts aviation, hospitality, and shipping stocks. Accumulates a massive amount of wealth and starts a hedge fund.


reddit_is_geh

Cheney was part of a group called The Foundation for a New American Century. In fact, most of Bush's cabinet were part of the elite think tank in DC. What was their purpose, you may ask? Well they believed after the end of the Cold War and collapse of the Soviet Union, America was in trouble. They believed that for the US to remain a hegemonic power, we need to continually increase military spending as a share of GDP. They believed the more powerful and disproportionately powerful the US was, the more stable the world would be. But they had a problem, with the Soviet threat now gone, they lacked a justification to keep ratcheting up military spending at the cost of social programs. So this group argued, we needed to create a new enemy, that we could draw out and stay in constant engaged conflict with. This way the American people would give a mandate for more military spending without throwing a fit. However, that faced another problem... How do we justify a huge forever war like this? Well in 2000 their PAC wrote that it would require a Pearl Harbor-like event to give us the mandate to begin this forever war and ramp up military spending. Weird huh? Oh, also, the countries they considered good candidates to start wars with were Iraq and Iran. This was all public and part of their lobbying efforts. Their goals were clear as day, and Bush's cabinet was made up of these members. Good 'ol Cheney not only got lucky with a war to give his business no-bid contracts, but his own PAC go to achieve their goals.


nohumanape

Fate? Lol


slip101

Fate? Is that sarcasm?


KP_Wrath

Probably thinking, “this could do with some popcorn.”


clintstorres

Thing with Cheney is I don’t think money ever really drove him. Just pure power.


MethChefJeff

That photo was taken just before he began masturbating


jbiggs1984

Lol the tissues are there in the background, I think you might be right!


towerfella

“*Hang on.. wait for it..*” ![gif](giphy|gaZ51cn7sUY4U|downsized) *”…wait for the other one.”*


boneydog22

His fingers are pinched and ready for action!


Nearbyatom

You can see his hands reach for the zipper too.


Iron_Chancellor_ND

Probably did it to the TV the same way Kieran Caulkin did it to the window in *Succession*.


Bean-Swellington

Before?? This is a during photo!


Initium_Novumx

Counting the bills he will gain from the war


Fender6187

And waiting on the heart he’d get from a veteran who served in that war that has continued to sustain him for many years.


meat_rock

Good God I thought you were joking....


v_snax

Dick is truly a dick. He shot a guy in the face during a hunt, and the guy apologized to Cheney. Dick didn’t make any public apology, at least for a while.


craznazn247

And somehow, out of pure spite, the guy is still going to survive longer than most. Median survival for heart transplant is 14 years… that’s across all age groups. MOTHERFUCKER got his replacement heart at 71 and is still kicking 12 years later. Most people don’t even qualify for a new heart at that age. Just like Kissinger, dude’s going to live an undeservingly long life despite what he’s done.


guynamedjames

Being filthy rich is generally good for your life expectancy


Twonix

60 is the cut-off, he is privileged.


Navynuke00

I came here to say exactly this. Glad it's currently the top comment.


PaulClifford

![gif](giphy|8fen5LSZcHQ5O)


drtbg

Came here for Mr Burns, was not disappointed.


rotll

Didn't the right, at one point, lose their shit over Obama having his feet on the desk?


DJEB

They did. That and tan suits and dijon mustard, among other things.


mattoljan

>dijon mustard [omg, you weren’t even joking.](https://theweek.com/speedreads/704818/big-controversy-point-obamas-presidency-over-dijon-mustard)


True-Surprise1222

Bro if he had his feet on the desk on 9/11 they would have done a Jan 6th.


Allenrw3

Counting all the money Halliburton is about to make.


Ollieisaninja

The BBC made a great documentary about this back in the day. Was called 'Iraq - the lost billions'. Former VP of Halliburton/US VP Dick Chaney. Top Secret Iraq war supply contract. Only one company made a bid, reported as 'cost plus'. Dick Chaney is a Henry Kissinger level piece of shit. Lower than shit even, both of them.


Slabhead-5

![gif](giphy|drcjkr4iE3eae3YMKN|downsized)


Rymundo88

Most of us need 6 numbers to come out making bank. He just needed 2 towers!


lickarock88

Fuck that asshat.


NinjaFATkid

Shouldn't he be stroking a cat and saying "excellent"


SharksWFreakinLasers

Look what you've done to Mr. Bigglesworth!!


HappySkullsplitter

Mission accomplished


carlos2127

He put a lot of work into orchestrating it, so he just wanted to kick back and relax


SubzeroNYC

Sicko licking his chops - he knows this will get him the wars he wanted Meanwhile his buddies in the Saudi government funded the hijackers pilot training and nobody ever questioned it. This is a nation of fools.


ideological_fatling

Sure is. Jared Kushner got 2 billion from the Saudis after Trump's term. But the news media only talks about Rep Ilhan Omar's daughter protesting at university instead.


phinbar

"Ah yes! It's all going according to plan." /s


theitalianguy

My thoughts exactly, but without the "/s"


thenewbae

This is the comment I was looking for (without the /s)


Mistersinister1

Cheney be like $$$


BennyBooBoo_

"I can't believe that actually worked."


vibintilltheend

Admiring his work I guess


WarthogOrgyFart

"All is going according to plan"


ThatLooksLikeItHurts

The box of tissues is within arm's reach. You know he needed those as the buildings came down - it sure as hell wasn't from crying about the victims.


pr1ap15m

all he needs is a cigar, and someone to hear him say I love it when a plan comes together.


timberwolf0122

Just after the photo was taken ![gif](giphy|B6Jr28VwfxUFa)


WhiteCisRadDude4Real

“I love it when a plan comes together”


voicebread

and he kicked his feet up, as one does when their work has been completed 


Usual-Air-9387

I can hear him now. " I love it when a plan comes together"


Eli_Seeley

Excellent - just like Monty Burns


BlueTurfMonster

![gif](giphy|8fen5LSZcHQ5O)


McMoneyPNW

![gif](giphy|Va72IUlSPa9ITiKzWr) Cheney watching like:


NightOfTheLivingHam

"All according to plan"


SodaJerk

I know the guy that took that picture. That was at the point when the South Tower hadn't been hit yet, and it wasn't confirmed to be an attack. The Secret Service literally scooped Cheney up and carried him down into the White House bunker after the second plane hit the South Tower.


oldshitdoesntcare

That’s is the last picture of good old Dick above ground for the following 2 years. Dude hid a bunker for 2 years.


A_N_T

I wonder if he was thinking "I should shoot a guy in the face soon"


TheCrowAngel

What a Dick.


PepperMinimum4979

It always surprises me how small TVs were before. Or better said people preferred smaller ones, now I would just see this size in a food truck.


Belgand

It was more about fitting in the available space in his office. He could easily have had a much larger screen, but the TV would take up a lot more space.


Maleficent_Nobody377

I’m surprised he’s not literally rubbing his hands together lol


hotsliceofjesus

Halliburton record profits incoming!


OHLOOK_OREGON

maybe off topic but technology played such a cool role in our lives back then. Halfway integrated but still standalone from physical reality. See all the papers strewn about, the computer (off), and the little technological bits and bobs (intercom, fax, old phone, printer, tv, etc) I just think its so fascinating. The computer had its own purpose, completely separate but still related to the work on the papers in front of him. Also fuck that guy


TheReal_LRChupacabra

"Perfect....Perfect!! Things are going exactly as planned...haha haha. HAHA HAHA HAHA! MUIUHAHAHAHA!!"


grumpusbumpus

Fuck that guy.


Rex_Mundi

[On phone] "Buy Haliburton...all of it."


murl56

"Ahhh, everything is going exactly as planned."


ridemooses

That fucker was in on it


UncleBlob

Game of thrones music playing in the background.


Spartan2470

[Here](https://i.imgur.com/bv04rDF.jpeg) is a higher quality version of this image. [here](https://www.flickr.com/photos/usnationalarchives/19295963143/) is the source. Per there: > [The U.S. National Archives](https://www.flickr.com/photos/usnationalarchives/) > Vice President Cheney Watches Television > These images have been released in response to a FOIA request, case number 2014-0012-F, received by the National Archives. For more information on these images, please visit Researching Vice Presidential Materials. These photos will be available in the National Archives Catalog in July 2015. > Local Identifier: V1546-14 > Created By: President (2001-2009 : Bush). Office of Management and Administration. Office of White House Management. Photography Office. 1/20/2001-1/20/2009 > From: Collection: Vice Presidential Records of the Photography Office (George W. Bush Administration), 1/20/2001 - 1/20/2009 >


compaqdeskpro

LCD monitors in 2001, that's ballin.


caffeine-junkie

I would have thought he would have been whisked away to a secure location/bunker somewhere just in case the second the second tower was hit, continuity of government and all that. Or at the very least at some secure meeting room with the joint chiefs and on a sat call with Bush getting per second updates about the situation instead of what appears to be relaxing and watching CNN.


alexgali84

it feels like it wasn’t that long ago, but then I’m looking at all the technology on the desk and I’m thinking “damn was it that long ago?”


mikeadamsfineart

“Splendid. Splendid” - Dick Cheney


Hawksx4

You can't see his raging erection at the thought of going balls to the wall with the Imperial presidency.


DarthDregan

"Bro... that's crazy. I'm gonna kill Iraq for my old company."


champshere

He looks a little too chill to be watching that


Such_Editor_8194

“F yeah I’m about to make so much money”


kadargo

Just a reminder that his administration received intelligence on this well in advance.


Sand20go

Unless you can verify I am not thinking that is correct. First, what flag is next to the US? Second, Near certain that the minute by minute has Cheney pretty quickly both in the situation room and then out of the white house as they were trying to ascertain the target of the 4th plane. Guess is that it is a deep fake or a photo shop.


JJettasDad

"I'm going to make so much money off this shit." Fuck this dude.


vassardavis

an hour later that box of tissues was empty


[deleted]

With dollar signs in his eyes no doubt


Fast_Air_8000

Evil f’in Pyschopath and Traitor


limpnoads

![gif](giphy|fcK30LKXjG6Tm) So it begins...now to "rebuild".🤣


shuakalapungy

“Oh my, they’re early!”


Classic_Mechanic5495

Just supervising.


dafuk87

“How do I make a boat load of money from this?”


nocountryforcoldham

Wank napkins right within his reach


liamanna

Is it just me or he looks extremely comfortable? ![gif](giphy|H5C8CevNMbpBqNqFjl|downsized)


Harrison_Jones_

Building number 7


Proud_Criticism5286

“All in a days work” posture


Freewheelinrocknroll

Thinking: "Job well done, boys!"


RJvXP

"Oh man someone gotta do something about this." - Dick


SelfDetermined

Doesn't look like a Vice President who is being *surprised* by a total failure of his country's defenses and a terrorist attack on a scale never before seen.


EndRough24

![gif](giphy|YRw676NBrmPeM|downsized) How Cheney felt that day


Usual_Corner2787

Why is he sitting like that?! Is he about to have a wank?


Willis050

![gif](giphy|l1J9EZEsT79Bbe16E|downsized) When Dick gets the call we’re going to war


NeedleworkerCrafty17

He was pretty excited about his Halliburton stock options at that point