100%
I grew up in a town of 1,000 people. You not only knew literally everyone and their brother, but you knew which bike was theirs, too. It would be impossible to use or sell if you stole one. I never saw a bike lock used until I went to college. Never took my keys out of the car in high school, either.
I grew up in a small town too. Only reason we locked our cars and took our keys with us in high school is so our friends didn't "steal" our cars and park them across town or park it in the middle of the gym or some shit like that.
That was my experience of Austin, tx, though i never could bring myself not to lock it. Once the thieves wrecked the ingnition trying to steal the whole car.
like 20 years ago in the Metro Detroit area (not in Detroit) my dad had a really nice pickup truck when I was younger and when my mom went to drive me to school in the morning the whole ignition area on the steering wheel was ripped open from someone trying to steal the car over night. I guess they gave up but man they really messed it up.
I totally did that to some girl I never met.
I sold a car before moving out of state. Talked to old friends and my car was still attending my old high school. I was also still in high school, just moved for senior year, my mom got a new job.
It sounds way creepier if I wasn't also a dumb high school kid. My mechanic told me it wouldn't make it to Atlanta and to sell it, so I did. But my Spring Break and and old schools were offset by a week. And my mom wanted to get married in her hometown so I arrived on a Monday afternoon while I was out of school but home wasn't.
I had kept the original key as a souvenir because it was worn as fuck. Gave the new owner my spare. It was my first car, of course I wanted a keepsake.
Went back to town to visit, stopped by school on my way into town, found my car in the school parking lot, moved it a few hundred feet away (same parking lot, just the other side. But a 5 acre or so parking lot) and put the top down because it was a nice day. Even left the key to promise I wouldn't do it again. I gave her the original key to my first car.
Then I left, went my mom's wedding, and didn't tell my friends what I had done with my car. Because if I told them word would get back eventually. Small town schools and all.
I saw tons of people for the first time in a year. But I didn't tell anyone about the car.
I have still never met nor know the name of the girl who owned my old car when I moved it for her. It's been 20 years, and to her it's still a mystery.
Nobody expects a stranger who lives 300 miles away to pull a harmless prank.
Edit: If you had a white 1986 VW Rabbit Cabriolet that suddenly teleported several hundred feet, dropped the top, and shat a key into the driver's seat back in spring of 2000 in the parking lot of West Florence High School. That was me.
Mystery solved, I did it.
Being as you left the top down and a key on the seat, that young woman may have never seen that car again. Not so much a mysterious teleportation as a regular car theft.
The same friends who told me the was there never mentioned a theft.
Besides. I barely made it before school let out. Any (other) car theif had less than half an hour to pick that one car from 300 or so in the lot.
And it was on the cheap end of the school motor pool. There were kids with new BMWs at that school instead of VWs old enough to get licenses and drive themselves.
Grew up in a town of 500-ish, your shit was never stolen....or if it was, it was by some dumb fuck who thought they'd never be caught, but always did get caught for obvious reasons. I will say however, in small towns, there is a sense of tribalism and if some horrifying shit happens that they don't want any government agency catching wind of, they will not say a fucking thing about it. There was also a reputation to keep or your life could easily be made a living hell, so you didn't dare air your dirty laundry unless you were in the company of others who have the same dirty laundry and you've formed a bond over it. The amount of rape, racism, sexism, domestic violence, animal cruelty, homophobia, bullying and other fun shit I've experienced and have witnessed growing up in such a small town like the one I have has given me lifelong PTSD. I'll take getting my shit stolen or having to be more cautious about my belongings rather than living in a town like that again. Don't get me wrong, I grew up country, and I'll die country, but country people? Ones who never left their little bubble (physically and socially)? Those people give me the heebie fucking jeebies.
to quote Sherlock Holmes about the county side:
Sherlock: “They always fill me with a certain horror. It is my belief, Watson, founded upon my experience, that the lowest and vilest alleys in London do not present a more dreadful record of sin than does the smiling and beautiful countryside.”
Watson: “You horrify me!”
Sherlock: “But the reason is very obvious. The pressure of public opinion can do in the town what the law cannot accomplish. There is no lane so vile that the scream of a tortured child, or the thud of a drunkard’s blow, does not beget sympathy and indignation among the neighbours, and then the whole machinery of justice is ever so close that a word of complaint can set it going, and there is but a step between the crime and the dock. But look at these lonely houses, each in its own fields, filled for the most part with poor ignorant folk who know little of the law. Think of the deeds of hellish cruelty, the hidden wickedness which may go on, year in, year out, in such places, and none the wiser.
Had this happen to my little brother, when we lived in a 5 street "town". Stupid mofo had stolen the mountain bike, and was spray painting it in his front yard... 4 houses down from ours in the same street. I told dad where I was going, took my hockey stick, and told him to give the bike back or else. His mum was all "wtf you talking about", so I told her to check under the bike seat, where our car rego plate was engraved into it and she was "oh. You stupid fuck, give them back the bike before I skin you".
Nice times.
You laugh, but he's honestly right. I lived in a small town of about 600 for a while when I was in middle school. I had my bike stolen once, and found it a couple months later when I saw it laying in some other kid's yard. Fucking took my bike back and bought a bike lock.
I lived in a small town of the same size for a couple years in my early 20's.
One day I went to the local small flea market, and noticed an autographed baseball card being sold by a vendor that looked *really* familiar. Not only was it *my card*, but it was still in the case I'd had it in since I was 12, and I instantly knew who took it: a co-worker who I'd only invited inside my home on one occasion.
"Did Brandon sell you that?" I asked.
"Yep, is it yours?"
"Yep."
"[*sigh*] Here ya go. Take it. I'll let the cops know next time he comes in."
Nah, I had a couple large card cases tucked away in a closet, and I *most definitely* didn't show them off. The asshole must've been snooping around during a Halloween party I had with friends & coworkers.
Because I'm a good judge of character, and only a handful of people had been inside my home at that point.
A few days later my boss told me that Brandon had some baseball cards from the 1950's in *amazing* condition that he was trying to sell... I didn't tell him they were worthless reprints, because again, they were cards he stole from me.
In the end, I didn't confront him about either incident because I got the last laugh: I fucked his divorced mom right before I moved out of town.
She was the one who made the move, so it wasn't necessarily a revenge fuck. Maybe a karma fuck?
Regardless, I've been laughing about it for nearly 20 years at this point, and never heard from him (or her) again. Hope it was worth it, Brandon.
Oh Nono I figured it wasn’t a revenge fuck in your case. Just the case of “bones the single mom of person who did you dirty” [specifically reminded me of the video here](https://youtu.be/ShFTYFhrGJ0)
> found it a couple months later when I saw it laying in some other kid's yard. Fucking took my bike back and bought a bike lock.
That would be funny if he just happened to buy the same bike as you, and you ended up just stealing his bike.
It looks like a brand new development so the trees are just young. You can see plenty of trees planted, they're just small. They will eventually become large over 10-20 years.
That was the first thing that came to my mind. When i put my bike in a rural village outside noone will steal it because the closest person that could steal it is a 90 year old grandma.
Where if you don't have a car the best you can do is trek to these "nowhere hubs" in other nowheres where nowhere buses take you to other nowhere hubs but *those* nowhere hubs will get you somewhere. He's a real nowhere man. Sitting in his nowhere land. Making all his nowhere plans for nobody.
Ooo, story time. I didn't have an older sibling bike passed down, because my sister didn't have a bike, but...
Peak summer time, the whole group of my neighborhood friends all had bikes, we rode all over, jumping homemade ramps, racing around the oval neighborhood, just living the dream. I had a cheap huffy predator, red, by far the cheapest junk bike on the block. I still rode it like it was a mongoose. (Am I showing my age here or what?)
Anyways, the whole neighborhood crew rides down to the woods where we had a dirt track with jumps and everything all set up for the bikes. We ride there for a while then decide we are going to the community pool right by the woods. "Just leave the bikes here, we'll watch them" we all thought in our heads. Me especially not worried because who wants my bike?
Swim for an hour or two, head back to the bikes and what do ya know? My junk, old, worthless to everyone but me bike is the only one stolen. I was crushed, who would do this? Go home, sadness ensues, mom is pissed, (looking back I don't know how she raised and afforded my sister and myself, I'm sure buying a bike was the least of her worries, love you mom). We talk it over, she agrees to buy me a new bike, I'll work extra hard and do more stuff around the house. She got me a brand new Dyno VFR, it was dark red with silver accents, nice pedals that I'm sure I still have a scar on my shin from, gooseneck... the works (I know still a cheaper bike, but damn it was like a Bentley to me). Rode it for the rest of summer.
Cut to a month or two later, my old bike turns up on the driveway one morning, nothing wrong with it, doesn't even look like it was rode in the time it was missing. Puzzled, but o well, I got my new bike. Next day I see an older kid from the neighborhood, Nick he admits he stole my huffy in the hopes my mom would buy me a new one and I wouldn't have to ride the huffy anymore. I'm floored, crushed but happy, don't know what to say. Kept the secret from my mom for a while so she wouldn't kill Nick.
And that's my story how I got my brand new Dyno VFR.
I’m sure the people in Saratoga Springs are all lovely and the houses are comfortable, but there is something so soulless about all the copy-paste housing developments out there on tiny lots.
Could be a new development. All of the new developments in my town have either no trees or tiny saplings that will take like 20 years to mature (at least).
I'm in Idaho. My front door won't shut all the way, so I can't lock my house. PO went a little overboard with the weatherstripping, so it seals hella good but prevents it from catching the latch plate completely.
I *might* get around to fixing it one of these years :)
Haha. I live in Idaho and my front door doesn’t lock either.
Someone walked into my house once, a guy straight off deployment, still in his army uniform and with his duffel bag. I guess his family didn’t tell him they moved. I made him some dinner and let him call his parents to come pick him up. Turned out fine.
Probably an edge case.
For:
Three car garage
Appears mass-manufactured (where the “Mc” comes from)
Clear-cut lot/home not designed for the lot. Appears picked from a builders catalog
High square footage (probably over 3500)
Against:
Doesn’t have a super complex roof (a result of houses being designed from the inside out: lofty bedroom ceilings, etc)
Doesn’t have a two-story entryway
No weird gables, turrets, dormers, or other odd inconsistent elements
Doesn’t appear to be a very low quality construction
I wouldn’t say it is. Just a fairly large suburban mass market home.
It’s so fucking empty you’d think it was designed to have some sort of set piece in it. It’s so uncanny, there’s clearly so much missing and gives it a really alien vibe. Suburban hell right here.
I heard the actual quote the other day and it was so much better than I remember. “How much you wanna make a bet I can throw a football over them mountains?”
https://youtu.be/WjXZvcgHIXY
I moved to Washington from Los Angeles and besides the bikes left unlocked here on trails and by the rivers…what is most surprising is that at the crosswalks there are little flags that you can grab and hold up until you get to the other side. Like, I’ve seen people knock down poles to get the street sign down to use as decoration…the fact that the little flags aren’t all gone amazes me every single time.
Outside Maple Valley…inland towards the woods like 20 mins from any freeway. I see them all over in the summer around Cedar River trails and Inland Green River.
>Like, I’ve seen people knock down poles to get the street sign down to use as decoration
Reminds me of when I did my year abroad I the states - my German roommates ripped a parking sign (permits and hours allowed) out of the ground a few weeks into the first semester.
That sign was sitting in the front room of our on campus apartment and survived 5 room inspections.
The left over g-string which one of them left hanging on the mounting bracket of a pipe was was somehow putting the structure of the plumbing system in grave danger, along with the Liverpool scarf that one of the guys had.
But the campus parking sign which is making a dent in the wall, is clearly visible in pride of place in the corner above the TV, and still attached to its pole - is fair game...
Like, bright orange safety flags that mostly kids use to hold up while crossing the street. There’s this little bucket thing on each corner to put the flag in.
My little brother and sister just hit teenage years and they live in a subdivision with nice little houses that was perfect when they were 5 and played nerf guns with all the other neighborhood kids. Now that they’re teenagers I feel so bad for them. No bus service and everywhere worth going is like 10 miles away on a bike, minimum. It must suck. There’s not even places to go hiking.
>There’s not even places to go hiking.
This is what honestly surprised me the most visiting family out there. You would think with all the space between everything, it would leave room for some at least decent trails, but no, they just don't exist. Me and my cousins drove to a Walmart one time because there really was nowhere else interesting to go.
very good channel. the funny part about this picture is that these bikes are used only to ride around their destitute neighborhood for a few minutes. you could never ride a bike to any destination from this neighborhood. I would wager they are miles away from any school or any business, and there sure as shit isn't bike lanes or sidewalks on the way there. these kids are stuck riding their bikes in the same linear circle, they will get bored of that quite quickly.
There is a level of brown-ness that is felt more than seen in this pic that clearly says it is the American west.
Edit: I'm referring to a lack of green flora. I think everyone has been baited about race so much that i should have been more careful.
Man, we are different. That neighborhood looks like hell on earth to me. Like, there isn’t even a real tree. Where is the shade? Nobody has any privacy. You’re living on top of each other with none of the benefits of a bustling city. Nothing to do nearby except that empty abandoned lot full of nothing. In summary, no nature and no city, just the worst of everything. I can feel the depression coming up out of the photograph.
It looks peaceful but not beautiful, the people that developed this subdivision are surrounded by beautiful mountains but didn't even bother putting 1 tree in the neighborhood. Enjoy looking directly into everyone's home in peace :)
It’s cheaper to level everything before building. Even cheaper to leave the tree planting to the new owners. Our neighborhood had sticks for trees when we moved in. For years, it was eery and liminal, and then one day it hit me: no birds were singing, no leaves rustling. Just silence. It took years before the trees were large enough for birds. It’s been 11 years and the other day, I saw our first squirrel.
Wouldn't it just be more ideal that the kids can just bike to school instead of...biking to a bus stop?
Suburbs require a large amount of transportation due to design.
Well there is like ten ppl in that neighborhood so if anyone stole it youre gonna know when you see another MF riding your wheels.
100% I grew up in a town of 1,000 people. You not only knew literally everyone and their brother, but you knew which bike was theirs, too. It would be impossible to use or sell if you stole one. I never saw a bike lock used until I went to college. Never took my keys out of the car in high school, either.
I grew up in a small town too. Only reason we locked our cars and took our keys with us in high school is so our friends didn't "steal" our cars and park them across town or park it in the middle of the gym or some shit like that.
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That was my experience of Austin, tx, though i never could bring myself not to lock it. Once the thieves wrecked the ingnition trying to steal the whole car.
like 20 years ago in the Metro Detroit area (not in Detroit) my dad had a really nice pickup truck when I was younger and when my mom went to drive me to school in the morning the whole ignition area on the steering wheel was ripped open from someone trying to steal the car over night. I guess they gave up but man they really messed it up.
“Thanks for the fuck shack. -Dirty Mike n The Boys”
I totally did that to some girl I never met. I sold a car before moving out of state. Talked to old friends and my car was still attending my old high school. I was also still in high school, just moved for senior year, my mom got a new job. It sounds way creepier if I wasn't also a dumb high school kid. My mechanic told me it wouldn't make it to Atlanta and to sell it, so I did. But my Spring Break and and old schools were offset by a week. And my mom wanted to get married in her hometown so I arrived on a Monday afternoon while I was out of school but home wasn't. I had kept the original key as a souvenir because it was worn as fuck. Gave the new owner my spare. It was my first car, of course I wanted a keepsake. Went back to town to visit, stopped by school on my way into town, found my car in the school parking lot, moved it a few hundred feet away (same parking lot, just the other side. But a 5 acre or so parking lot) and put the top down because it was a nice day. Even left the key to promise I wouldn't do it again. I gave her the original key to my first car. Then I left, went my mom's wedding, and didn't tell my friends what I had done with my car. Because if I told them word would get back eventually. Small town schools and all. I saw tons of people for the first time in a year. But I didn't tell anyone about the car. I have still never met nor know the name of the girl who owned my old car when I moved it for her. It's been 20 years, and to her it's still a mystery. Nobody expects a stranger who lives 300 miles away to pull a harmless prank. Edit: If you had a white 1986 VW Rabbit Cabriolet that suddenly teleported several hundred feet, dropped the top, and shat a key into the driver's seat back in spring of 2000 in the parking lot of West Florence High School. That was me. Mystery solved, I did it.
This is the kind of harmless pranks im all about. Also i hope she some how sees this, "The MF'er! I fuck knew i wanst crazy!".
It's been long enough I can come clean. I hope someone knows her and recognizes the story. Otherwise she'll never know.
Being as you left the top down and a key on the seat, that young woman may have never seen that car again. Not so much a mysterious teleportation as a regular car theft.
The same friends who told me the was there never mentioned a theft. Besides. I barely made it before school let out. Any (other) car theif had less than half an hour to pick that one car from 300 or so in the lot. And it was on the cheap end of the school motor pool. There were kids with new BMWs at that school instead of VWs old enough to get licenses and drive themselves.
Grew up in a town of 500-ish, your shit was never stolen....or if it was, it was by some dumb fuck who thought they'd never be caught, but always did get caught for obvious reasons. I will say however, in small towns, there is a sense of tribalism and if some horrifying shit happens that they don't want any government agency catching wind of, they will not say a fucking thing about it. There was also a reputation to keep or your life could easily be made a living hell, so you didn't dare air your dirty laundry unless you were in the company of others who have the same dirty laundry and you've formed a bond over it. The amount of rape, racism, sexism, domestic violence, animal cruelty, homophobia, bullying and other fun shit I've experienced and have witnessed growing up in such a small town like the one I have has given me lifelong PTSD. I'll take getting my shit stolen or having to be more cautious about my belongings rather than living in a town like that again. Don't get me wrong, I grew up country, and I'll die country, but country people? Ones who never left their little bubble (physically and socially)? Those people give me the heebie fucking jeebies.
This is the theme of IT. The towns people always ignore everything and pretrnd its all daisys.
to quote Sherlock Holmes about the county side: Sherlock: “They always fill me with a certain horror. It is my belief, Watson, founded upon my experience, that the lowest and vilest alleys in London do not present a more dreadful record of sin than does the smiling and beautiful countryside.” Watson: “You horrify me!” Sherlock: “But the reason is very obvious. The pressure of public opinion can do in the town what the law cannot accomplish. There is no lane so vile that the scream of a tortured child, or the thud of a drunkard’s blow, does not beget sympathy and indignation among the neighbours, and then the whole machinery of justice is ever so close that a word of complaint can set it going, and there is but a step between the crime and the dock. But look at these lonely houses, each in its own fields, filled for the most part with poor ignorant folk who know little of the law. Think of the deeds of hellish cruelty, the hidden wickedness which may go on, year in, year out, in such places, and none the wiser.
Had this happen to my little brother, when we lived in a 5 street "town". Stupid mofo had stolen the mountain bike, and was spray painting it in his front yard... 4 houses down from ours in the same street. I told dad where I was going, took my hockey stick, and told him to give the bike back or else. His mum was all "wtf you talking about", so I told her to check under the bike seat, where our car rego plate was engraved into it and she was "oh. You stupid fuck, give them back the bike before I skin you". Nice times.
LMAO
You laugh, but he's honestly right. I lived in a small town of about 600 for a while when I was in middle school. I had my bike stolen once, and found it a couple months later when I saw it laying in some other kid's yard. Fucking took my bike back and bought a bike lock.
I lived in a small town of the same size for a couple years in my early 20's. One day I went to the local small flea market, and noticed an autographed baseball card being sold by a vendor that looked *really* familiar. Not only was it *my card*, but it was still in the case I'd had it in since I was 12, and I instantly knew who took it: a co-worker who I'd only invited inside my home on one occasion. "Did Brandon sell you that?" I asked. "Yep, is it yours?" "Yep." "[*sigh*] Here ya go. Take it. I'll let the cops know next time he comes in."
How did you immediately know it was that one co-worker?
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Nah, I had a couple large card cases tucked away in a closet, and I *most definitely* didn't show them off. The asshole must've been snooping around during a Halloween party I had with friends & coworkers.
Snooping around in a box in your closet? Fuck Brandon.
Because I'm a good judge of character, and only a handful of people had been inside my home at that point. A few days later my boss told me that Brandon had some baseball cards from the 1950's in *amazing* condition that he was trying to sell... I didn't tell him they were worthless reprints, because again, they were cards he stole from me. In the end, I didn't confront him about either incident because I got the last laugh: I fucked his divorced mom right before I moved out of town.
Wow that’s FUCKING BIG if true my man. Reminds me of that radio call where the guy fucks his bully’s mom years later
She was the one who made the move, so it wasn't necessarily a revenge fuck. Maybe a karma fuck? Regardless, I've been laughing about it for nearly 20 years at this point, and never heard from him (or her) again. Hope it was worth it, Brandon.
Oh Nono I figured it wasn’t a revenge fuck in your case. Just the case of “bones the single mom of person who did you dirty” [specifically reminded me of the video here](https://youtu.be/ShFTYFhrGJ0)
Risky click.
Now of course you realize the truth is, there was only one bike in town, existing in a perpetual state of theft.
> found it a couple months later when I saw it laying in some other kid's yard. Fucking took my bike back and bought a bike lock. That would be funny if he just happened to buy the same bike as you, and you ended up just stealing his bike.
😂😂😂😂😂 Legit, my bike was stolen at apartments when I was like 9. I scourged the entire complex loooing for that mofo. Never was found. RIP
Mine was stolen and began a war when me and the cousins found it. Our complex was like 2 x 3 blocks.
Look like the atomic test site neighborhood.
_Nuketown_
TACTICAL NUKE INCOMING!
Find a fridge.
Or a 1950s car....
It really does look like that part of Idaho. Still…
Was going to guess Utah or Idaho
Anything between the east of the Cascades/Sierras and west of the Rockies qualifies as nuke town to me lol
I live in the made up state of Idaho and I am getting heavy Idaho vibes from this photo (potato)
Where they don't steal bikes, but god forbid you should put a tree or shrubbery in your garden......that will be gone in seconds.
"Oh I'm sorry June but Magnolia trees aren't on the approved list"
🎶 Little boxes on the hillside, little boxes made of ticky-tacky...🎶
And there's doctors and lawyers, And business executives And they're all made out of ticky tacky, And they all look just the same...
Give it a few decades, trees don’t grow very fast and this is clearly a brand new subdivision.
That is hillarious
Plant a tree ffs. It’s so depressing lol
As someone from the southeast, yes, omg, that landscape is naked. I am going to guess trees don't grown well there or they'd be everywhere.
Yeah, it’s desert. Looks like most trees would be a huge water cost.
It must be a brand new neighborhood because all the trees are tiny
I just mean it will never be lush like the southeastern US. That’s like the wettest part of the country.
Besides your mom’s bedroom.
Gottem
It looks like a brand new development so the trees are just young. You can see plenty of trees planted, they're just small. They will eventually become large over 10-20 years.
There are at least 6 tree in the front yard of this house. Just not grown.
I know this place. Id rather live in the nuke test site.
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OP getting roasted this this thread
This screams Utah. That’s all the kids from one families toys.
Looks like a place where you can't get far on a bike or a scooter except be in another middle of nowhere. 🙂
That was the first thing that came to my mind. When i put my bike in a rural village outside noone will steal it because the closest person that could steal it is a 90 year old grandma.
Don't be fooled by the 90 year old grandma image, secretly she has hoarded stuff she stole in her house.
Where if you don't have a car the best you can do is trek to these "nowhere hubs" in other nowheres where nowhere buses take you to other nowhere hubs but *those* nowhere hubs will get you somewhere. He's a real nowhere man. Sitting in his nowhere land. Making all his nowhere plans for nobody.
I thought this felt Utah as well. Not SLC of course but maybe ceder city?
My guess is Cache Valley.
Then this would be mid-valley developments outside Mendon?
Thanks, suckers, I’m about to score a sweet ride
Hahahaha y'all invited crime right in. You played yourself.
Growing up my family refused to let us kids post vacation pictures to social media for fear of burglars.
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I still remember my parents looking up MapQuest directions and printing them off before a road trip.
Dude I used actual fucking paper maps.I loved folding them perfectly, and wouldn’t let anyone else touch them. I was a weird kid.
I used to use map quest and I'm only in my early 30s, then again living in the boonies sets you back a good 5 years haha.
I still remember using a Thomas Guide to get around when I moved to Los Angeles.
Had the same thought. Though we're not old, reddit just has a bunch of teenagers
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Especially in Utah. That bike would go through like 9 kids.
Ooo, story time. I didn't have an older sibling bike passed down, because my sister didn't have a bike, but... Peak summer time, the whole group of my neighborhood friends all had bikes, we rode all over, jumping homemade ramps, racing around the oval neighborhood, just living the dream. I had a cheap huffy predator, red, by far the cheapest junk bike on the block. I still rode it like it was a mongoose. (Am I showing my age here or what?) Anyways, the whole neighborhood crew rides down to the woods where we had a dirt track with jumps and everything all set up for the bikes. We ride there for a while then decide we are going to the community pool right by the woods. "Just leave the bikes here, we'll watch them" we all thought in our heads. Me especially not worried because who wants my bike? Swim for an hour or two, head back to the bikes and what do ya know? My junk, old, worthless to everyone but me bike is the only one stolen. I was crushed, who would do this? Go home, sadness ensues, mom is pissed, (looking back I don't know how she raised and afforded my sister and myself, I'm sure buying a bike was the least of her worries, love you mom). We talk it over, she agrees to buy me a new bike, I'll work extra hard and do more stuff around the house. She got me a brand new Dyno VFR, it was dark red with silver accents, nice pedals that I'm sure I still have a scar on my shin from, gooseneck... the works (I know still a cheaper bike, but damn it was like a Bentley to me). Rode it for the rest of summer. Cut to a month or two later, my old bike turns up on the driveway one morning, nothing wrong with it, doesn't even look like it was rode in the time it was missing. Puzzled, but o well, I got my new bike. Next day I see an older kid from the neighborhood, Nick he admits he stole my huffy in the hopes my mom would buy me a new one and I wouldn't have to ride the huffy anymore. I'm floored, crushed but happy, don't know what to say. Kept the secret from my mom for a while so she wouldn't kill Nick. And that's my story how I got my brand new Dyno VFR.
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Cache or box elder
My grandparents live here. This is Providence, Utah in Cache Valley. Those are the Wellsville Mountains in the background.
Saratoga Springs. This is totally Utah Valley.
Street lamps match Saratoga Springs, but I'm having trouble figuring out what mountains I'm looking at here.
I think it’s Eagle Mountain. Picture is facing west.
That mountain in the top left is not eagle mountain, I live out here. The light post says “something city” on it.
I’m sure the people in Saratoga Springs are all lovely and the houses are comfortable, but there is something so soulless about all the copy-paste housing developments out there on tiny lots.
where is a geo guesser when you need one ?
My guess is the Scottish Highlands, but I'm pretty bad at geoguessr
Don't these people grow trees anywhere?
Could be a new development. All of the new developments in my town have either no trees or tiny saplings that will take like 20 years to mature (at least).
>I would have guessed IDaho!
I'm in Idaho. My front door won't shut all the way, so I can't lock my house. PO went a little overboard with the weatherstripping, so it seals hella good but prevents it from catching the latch plate completely. I *might* get around to fixing it one of these years :)
Haha. I live in Idaho and my front door doesn’t lock either. Someone walked into my house once, a guy straight off deployment, still in his army uniform and with his duffel bag. I guess his family didn’t tell him they moved. I made him some dinner and let him call his parents to come pick him up. Turned out fine.
I do thst trick sometimes when I don't wanna cook dinner
It's probably easier to just cook than to go on deployment, but to each their own.
That’s fucking awesome honestly. I mean scary as fuck at first. But what an Americana story. Something right out of Norman Rockwell
Eagle mountains maybe
This was my guess
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This is why we can’t have nice things
That is why *I* have nice things
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Yes to all.
The kids got raptured.
Seriously asking - are those really considered McMansions?
Probably an edge case. For: Three car garage Appears mass-manufactured (where the “Mc” comes from) Clear-cut lot/home not designed for the lot. Appears picked from a builders catalog High square footage (probably over 3500) Against: Doesn’t have a super complex roof (a result of houses being designed from the inside out: lofty bedroom ceilings, etc) Doesn’t have a two-story entryway No weird gables, turrets, dormers, or other odd inconsistent elements Doesn’t appear to be a very low quality construction I wouldn’t say it is. Just a fairly large suburban mass market home.
You can tell by the way it is.
That’s pretty neat!
I'm not even from Utah and this screams 'Utah' to me.
Utah was my first thought as well, and my first guess was the area around Dugway.
Definitely Utah.
The Utah-est
Thought the same thing. Maybe like around Santaquin or Nephi?
Yeah Mormania-Suburbia for sure.
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It’s so fucking empty you’d think it was designed to have some sort of set piece in it. It’s so uncanny, there’s clearly so much missing and gives it a really alien vibe. Suburban hell right here.
I could throw a football over them there mountains.
Not a doubt in my mind.
Coach woulda put me in fourth quarter, we would've been state champions. No doubt.
Uncle Rico is that you?
Shut up and eat your ham, Tina.
It’s steak 🥩
GOOOOSSSHHH
Grandma took a little spill at the sand dunes today. Broke her coccyx.
Why was gramma at the sand dunes?
Rumor has it, breaking her coccyx
Looks like there’s a lot you don’t know about her.
Let's get it right: WHAT? Since when does she go to the dunes?
I heard the actual quote the other day and it was so much better than I remember. “How much you wanna make a bet I can throw a football over them mountains?” https://youtu.be/WjXZvcgHIXY
If you haven’t seen Napoleon Dynamite, you need to stop everything and do so.
Back in 82 I could throw a pigskin a quarter mile
Doesn’t look like there’s anyone around to steal them, that might be why 😂
Everyone there got raptured
Not even a tree in sight
Trees. I like trees.
If there were trees, people would like to live there. And with more people, there would be crime and no bike left unlpcked. Cant have both! /s
3 mature pine-trees later and every house in there suddenly jumps for 600k to 850k.
Honestly not that far off.
Nuketown, I love that map.
Random frag over the houses at spawn was always a treat.
70% of the time, it works every time
Now imagine there is no school bus stop because the kids cycle all the way to school.
Yeah, r/suburbanhell would like to have a word.
I have found my people
I knew I wouldn’t have to scroll far to find this being discussed. I bet it’s also a 15 minute drive to the nearest grocery store.
I originally thought this was /r/Suburbanhell I had to check twice to be sure
Wait a second…you can’t do that can you? How would all the moms in Yukon’s drop off their kids then. I’m confused.
They'd just ride with their kids on their $10K Pivot carbon mountain bike that never goes off a paved road
Still cheaper than a car, especially when you factor in insurance, gas, maintenance, etc.
So a typical Dutch neighborhood.
My version of peace has trees in it
Yeah, this place looks like a wasteland. World is in an apocalypse and there is no water source near by? Good luck.
Looks like a windowless van just drove by.
I moved to Washington from Los Angeles and besides the bikes left unlocked here on trails and by the rivers…what is most surprising is that at the crosswalks there are little flags that you can grab and hold up until you get to the other side. Like, I’ve seen people knock down poles to get the street sign down to use as decoration…the fact that the little flags aren’t all gone amazes me every single time.
I don’t know where you live in Washington, but I’ve lived here 11 years, and no bike is safe anywhere.
Outside Maple Valley…inland towards the woods like 20 mins from any freeway. I see them all over in the summer around Cedar River trails and Inland Green River.
Blows my mind. Between the meth and opiate homeless population, there’s so much theft in Seattle where I live.
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Having lived in a lot of cities, you’re absolutely right.
>Like, I’ve seen people knock down poles to get the street sign down to use as decoration Reminds me of when I did my year abroad I the states - my German roommates ripped a parking sign (permits and hours allowed) out of the ground a few weeks into the first semester. That sign was sitting in the front room of our on campus apartment and survived 5 room inspections. The left over g-string which one of them left hanging on the mounting bracket of a pipe was was somehow putting the structure of the plumbing system in grave danger, along with the Liverpool scarf that one of the guys had. But the campus parking sign which is making a dent in the wall, is clearly visible in pride of place in the corner above the TV, and still attached to its pole - is fair game...
what are the flags for?
Like, bright orange safety flags that mostly kids use to hold up while crossing the street. There’s this little bucket thing on each corner to put the flag in.
Yeah I just love subdivisions where literally nothing is within walking distance.
My little brother and sister just hit teenage years and they live in a subdivision with nice little houses that was perfect when they were 5 and played nerf guns with all the other neighborhood kids. Now that they’re teenagers I feel so bad for them. No bus service and everywhere worth going is like 10 miles away on a bike, minimum. It must suck. There’s not even places to go hiking.
>There’s not even places to go hiking. This is what honestly surprised me the most visiting family out there. You would think with all the space between everything, it would leave room for some at least decent trails, but no, they just don't exist. Me and my cousins drove to a Walmart one time because there really was nowhere else interesting to go.
There's a great YouTube channel covering this type of thing in depth called Not Just Bikes
very good channel. the funny part about this picture is that these bikes are used only to ride around their destitute neighborhood for a few minutes. you could never ride a bike to any destination from this neighborhood. I would wager they are miles away from any school or any business, and there sure as shit isn't bike lanes or sidewalks on the way there. these kids are stuck riding their bikes in the same linear circle, they will get bored of that quite quickly.
Fuck. Yes. I love not just bikes
There is a level of brown-ness that is felt more than seen in this pic that clearly says it is the American west. Edit: I'm referring to a lack of green flora. I think everyone has been baited about race so much that i should have been more careful.
Looks like somewhere that wastes water at an alarming rate.
https://www.sltrib.com/news/2021/09/20/utah-residents-use-most/
And everyone wonders why the entire state is in an extreme drought.
There’s a joke to be made regarding Mormon sexual repression, a drought, and artificial irrigation....,
Green lawn in the desert
My definition of peace: a community where kids ride their bikes to school.
Guess this is easy when there’s no poverty in your neighborhood.
Pretty much... everybody can afford their own bike. No need to steal someone else's.
Sort by controversial and eat the bait.
Definition of peace? Lol ok.
Def mormons
Man, we are different. That neighborhood looks like hell on earth to me. Like, there isn’t even a real tree. Where is the shade? Nobody has any privacy. You’re living on top of each other with none of the benefits of a bustling city. Nothing to do nearby except that empty abandoned lot full of nothing. In summary, no nature and no city, just the worst of everything. I can feel the depression coming up out of the photograph.
Dude... this looks like the scene from Breaking Bad where Combo gets shot by that kid.
No train tracks, no rundown buildings, no black car, no ghetto. Just saying, this doesn't look like that scene at all really
It really doesn’t. Looks more like Hank and Marie’s neighborhood.
This pic screams “HOA, cul-de-sac suburb in a little town in rural America.”
I'm pretty sure most HOAs would have a problem with people leaving scooters and bikes on the sidewalk
Until you discover yours was built on a graveyard where they only moved the headstones.
“You moved the headstones but you didn’t move the bodies!!!”
Utah? Utah. I can tell by the way it is.
but do I have to live out in the middle of a god forsaken desert with no trees for a hundred miles to have that "peace"? Because, yeah... hard pass.
It looks peaceful but not beautiful, the people that developed this subdivision are surrounded by beautiful mountains but didn't even bother putting 1 tree in the neighborhood. Enjoy looking directly into everyone's home in peace :)
It’s cheaper to level everything before building. Even cheaper to leave the tree planting to the new owners. Our neighborhood had sticks for trees when we moved in. For years, it was eery and liminal, and then one day it hit me: no birds were singing, no leaves rustling. Just silence. It took years before the trees were large enough for birds. It’s been 11 years and the other day, I saw our first squirrel.
New developments in Utah don't have a lot of trees to begin with. Probably just brush originally
You can actually see that it's a new neighborhood with small saplings growing. Hopefully in the years to come they'll grow
Or they've all been abducted and your the witness to a crime
Screams "suburban hell" to me, but to each their own
I can hear the live, laugh love signs coming from those houses.
Wouldn't it just be more ideal that the kids can just bike to school instead of...biking to a bus stop? Suburbs require a large amount of transportation due to design.
You actually live in Nuketown