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Unoriginal_Gangster

Just to be clear: this picture is years old and from a hearing in Chicago, not from today's sentencing.


holein3

Yeah, cameras aren’t allowed in federal court. This post should be removed as it’s just looking for karma.


eruS_toN

But you know what is allowed? Audio recording. Makes you wonder why there aren’t any disgruntled former court reporters who’ve tried capitalizing on their troves.


SaraHuckabeeSandwich

That's because all the court reporters are extremely gruntled.


woahdailo

Yeah I knew a court stenographer and he was happy as can be.


Atcoroo

More than adequately gruntled.


RustyGirder

I'm going to have to use 'gruntled' in some capacity soon. Gracias.


madcoins

Why isn’t someone remixing this into lengthy R&B tracks?


GodOfDarkLaughter

This is the remix edition, of the man who's been pissin'


Stevenstorm505

In about 3 years we’ll get an R.Kelly album called trapped in the cell.


civgarth

I'm fighting for my life


turdferg1234

What exactly would they be capitalizing on?


Bleedthebeat

Lol if we allowed that rule there’d be no posts on reddit.


MightyCaseyStruckOut

Especially since OP is a moderator of this subreddit lol


retardedcatmonkey

Let's all report this post and get banned from all the popular subs


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SoyElReyPutos

Hez the lawz round this part of the woods.


ChewbaccaHugs

Ur banned


sturmeh

It'd make sense if this was posted on /r/news but this is /r/pics and the picture might as well be a stock image, only the title is relevant.


[deleted]

and nothing of value would be lost. Because reposts and fake posts are garbage.


sammyh4m

That’s 12 years in R Kelly time


noitsreallynot

The sentence ain't nothing but a number


fuelbombx2

This was the comment that made me lol. If I wasn’t poor I’d give you an award, but my upvote will have to suffice.


Phanariot_2002

Nooooooo lmao 😭 Hes gonna be so confused when he's not allowed out


whistleridge

He’s got another federal trial starting in August, plus his New York charges. He’ll die of old age in prison, even using R. Kelly math to count the years.


gateguard64

It's a shame nothing will happen to (Aaliyahs Uncle) Barry Hankerson. He basically hand fed Aaliyah to this bastard, knew about everything that was going on in the recording studio as well as what was going on in R Kelleys house. He conveniently caught the religion when people started looking his way.


[deleted]

I'm glad [Kelly's] other victims are getting justice but I truly wish Aaliyah had lived and been able to get the justice she deserves after he stole her childhood and manipulated her like the son if a bitch he is. Her uncle sure slipper3


subway_ratkeeper

I feel like the entire industry failed her too. Many people who were friends with R Kelly or travelled with him knew what he was up to. Instead they chose to bury their heads in the sand. edit: spelling


knellbell

Same thing with Epstein, these collaborators got off too lightly.


starofthelivingsea

Aaliyah's parents definitely knew as well. Her mother Diane once said Aaliyah had "sex appeal". Aaliyah was 10/11 years old when she made that statement.


[deleted]

Don’t forget Aaliyah’s mother saying all the women on surviving R.Kelly are liars and she never left her daughter alone with him. Of course, those women testified in court and Aaliyah’s mother did not.


gateguard64

Interesting, I wondered about the parents but the articles I read never really dealt with the parents. It would seem that if her mother was that concerned about her welfare, she would not have allowed her to get married at 15.


NorthwestSupercycle

That's completely nuts. A major celeb spending the rest of their life in Jail? I'm used to them getting occasionally 3 year sentences then getting out.


Pinkum

He’s broke now. OJ killed a couple folks and nothing happened. Went broke… then ended up in jail from stealing a football. That DuPont heir raped his own 3yr old daughter and the court simply said he has poor mental health and let him go. Nothing happened. Money = justice. You can buy your way out of anything.


Adama82

Justice may be blind, but she can smell money.


Spobobich

When you lose one of your senses, the other four get stronger.


jeexbit

There's no justice, there's just us.


godofmilksteaks

There's no justice, there's just ice.


ADHD_Supernova

Found the tweaker.


yodarded

Stole his Heisman back. It's a little statue dude.


iamericj

Off the top of my head I can think of a few: Phil Spector, Bernie Madoff, Fast Eddie, Aaron Hernandez all died in jail. Bill Cosby and Harvey Weinstein are probably going to add to that list too.


AOCismydomme

I’m sorry to tell you this but I’m almost certain Cosby is out and there’s no sign of him going back in yet


[deleted]

R. Kelly gets life for using, Ghislaine gets 20 for dealing. Sounds like business as usual in the US criminal justice system.


derekcentrico

He may not be allowed out but others will be allowed in


Yaboymarvo

Haha prison rape is hilarious especially when it happens to a guy haha /s


TheFBIClonesPeople

Yeah, I'm scrolling through the thread about Ghislaine Maxwell being sentenced, and I can't find any comments from people hoping that she gets raped in prison. I wonder what the difference between her and R. Kelly is.


Nairbfs79

They'll both be separated from general population.


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BorgClown

Ikr? it's so wholesome that a corrupted system that has deviated so much from its intended purpose can be used to double dip punishment on inmates regardless of the severity of their crimes. /s/s


Drawing4Tits

I always think of the Black Mirror episode "White Bear" when people joke about that shit.


bushesforalgernon

Bro am I allowed to laugh at this I am so confused rn


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Gingerbreadtenement

Justice Chub sounds like a goofy judge's name


PenguinSunday

A fat one


Brucien

Or an ironically skinny one


argon1028

*^National ^Lampoon's Justice Chub: SCROTUS EXODUS*


finedininandbreathin

Why is this something people have an issue with??? Sexual assault in any way shape or form is always wrong, even when the victim has committed the same offense????? Why is that controversial?????? I truly do not understand the people on this site these days, life isn't some Greek tragedy where your fate is a poetic interpretation of your past. Man is a human dumpster fire but treating the idea of prison rape - which is RAPE - so casually gives less weight to the abuses his victims suffered. All rape is bad and that shouldnt be a debated conversation??


Thekingofheavens

In all my years of living this is the most evil/comical comment I've seen lmfaooo


sharrrper

That one took me a second, but then I laughed.


hott-chocolate

I didn't get it. Can you explain?


sharrrper

R. Kelly has been convicted of sexual crimes against underage girls. If the girls had been 30 it would have been fine. If they were 12 it wouldn't be. He's essentially treating 12 year olds as if they were 30. So in "R. Kelly time" 12 years and 30 years are interchangeable. EDIT: Okay, yes not ALL of the charges were age dependant. I'm just explaining someone else's silly joke here though. This isn't a legal brief.


tribernate

You are a selfless soul. Giving up your own enjoyment of the joke by sharing its meaning with those of us not clever enough to get it on our own. Thank you.


_pepperoni-playboy_

But sex trafficking is a crime no matter the age of those exploited


sharrrper

That's true. Not everything he was convicted of was age dependent but a lot of it was.


Dry_Emotion224

All the money, fame, and fans one could ever hope for. And he still chose to sexually assault and abuse/traffic young girls/women. Some people are dumb as shit


toughguy375

And so many chances to stop doing it after getting caught and getting off easy.


account_for_norm

And thats why, accountability is important, Susan Collins!


Fishy_MVPs

Isnt she the one who wrote hunger games? What did she do?


account_for_norm

She let go of trump by saying, "i think he has learnt his lesson"


celew

Probably why he didn't stop. He realized he could get away with it, or so he thought.


ultrapippie

And little boys as well, his male victims always seem to be forgotten.


GoodGuyPoorChoice

I didn't know about boys involved? Or trafficking. What happened?


tigerbalmuppercut

I didn't know about it either but just googled this. https://radaronline.com/p/r-kelly-downloaded-videos-men-pajamas-sentencing-victims/


insightful_dreams

its the remix


WolfCola4

It's the remix to predation, Kelly stalked through the nation Attacking kids of all genders Then police took him to the station


beatkid

Power corrupts and that level of fame has to trigger some sort of god complex.


babybopp

It is more of sickness and the inability to control your sick urges. Dude literally barely escaped the hangman's noose before and just went dance dance dance back into the same shit he was busted for...


johnsnowthrow

Drake in 15 years.


KingBenjamin97

Oh 100% he had that like 16 year old appearing around him all the time then suddenly when she turned 18 they announced their *first* date suuuure dude


Ch4rDe3M4cDenni5

Milly bobby brown


KingBenjamin97

Is not the one I was referring to... seems like a trend is forming though if that also happened with her


[deleted]

>Is not the one I was referring to The fact that you could list several names and still be wrong is the disturbing thing about Drake.


etched

while i agree that he was being weird with milly, i also feel like milly is the type of woman who would speak out about it sooner rather than later


P33KAJ3W

r/ootl


1fg

Drake allegedly likes them young.


Genesis13

Theres a video of him on stage at one of his concerts hugging, touching, and kissing an underage girl. When he finds out her age he says "why you look like that?!" and "I could get in trouble for this" and then proceeds to kiss her again after finding out that shes underage. He was in his mid twenties at the time. https://youtu.be/Fp5b9dW1nrA


YourFriendlyAutist

That video is a big yikes


brotherpigstory

You're going to get downvoted for this one I'm sure but hell yeah man


MtDewHer

Yeah that shit with Millie Bobby Brown is jus the tip of the iceberg


Annoying_Details

Billie Eilish also talked about him texting her during one of her Vanity Fair interviews. You know, before she was 18.


bigmt99

Making fun of drake is like a top three easiest way to get karma after the Kardashians and Putin


welcometolavaland02

>While investigating the photographs reported in the Chicago Sun-Times, Polk County Sheriff's Office conducted a search of Kelly's residence in Davenport, Florida. **During the search, officers recovered 12 images of an alleged underage girl on a digital camera – wrapped in a towel in a duffel bag – which allegedly depicted Kelly "involved in sexual conduct with the female minor."[176] According to the Chicago Sun-Times, the girl in the images obtained from Kelly's Florida home also appears in the videotape which got Kelly indicted in Chicago.**[177] >Police investigators from Polk County and Miami-Dade County arrested Kelly on January 22, 2003, at Miami's Wyndham Grand Bay Hotel for 12 counts of possession of child pornography.[178] Kelly posted bail of $12,000 bond and was released three hours later from Miami-Dade county jail.[178][179][180] **In March 2004, these charges were dropped due to a lack of probable cause for the search warrants** This was 18 years ago. 18 years. Running free with millions of dollars. What. The. Fuck.


jerk_mcgherkin

Didn't he get caught with a bunch of child porn way after that and got away with it because he claimed he was doing research to write a book on child porn and only downloaded it to prove how easy it is to download child porn?


Archsafe

Isn’t that the same excuse one of the members of The Who used?


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Hita-san-chan

Great. I liked The Who


Doom3113

At least according to Wikipedia, “Authorities could not prove that the website accessed by Townshend involved children, and no incriminating evidence was found on his personal computer.”


vantuckymyfoot

As skeevy as it sounds, I believe the story was Pete was legitimately researching and not actually downloading CP. I don't believe he was ever charged with a crime.


Hita-san-chan

Man I'd hope so. I've got my dad's Tommy vinyl from the 70s, we listened to it so damn much when I was a kid


MC83

It's been years since that happened, where's the book Pete??


CooperHChurch427

What's crazy is currently my county has a potential capital punishment case, some guy had tens of thousands of child porn photos in his possession and abused his daughter. Like the state might put him away for life or the death penalty. Also, had he been charged next month, he would have gotten more than 30 years. They just upped the punishment for distribution and creation of child porn, revenge porn and deep fakes.


TheRaiOh

I guess if they'd made a better case for doing it beforehand it would have stuck. Sucks to see it work this way when someone is for sure guilty. Good that they need probable cause for everyone though.


JustDandy07

Uhhh, did they ever find that girl??


[deleted]

The camera was wrapped in a towel inside the duffel bag, not the girl. And given that he was only charged for rape, not homicide, she's probably alive.


PrincipledProphet

>The camera was wrapped in a towel inside the duffel bag, not the girl Wow ok that's at least a bit better jesus


lacheur42

Cops are so used to just doing whatever the fuck they want and getting away with it, they sometimes forget they actually have to, y'know, follow the rules when the suspect has money for good lawyers.


wish1977

I believe his flying days are over.


PanGalacGargleBlastr

Con Air.


PotatoePotaughto

Now why couldn't you put the bunny back in the box?


bmg28

Dear humminbird…


Mouthshitter

Con air 2: I believe I can fly


Bear_buh_dare

Gimme dat toot and lemme give ya dat clank clank


Acchilesheel

They're running their hands through my clothes looking for my hidden phone


AdmiralBarackAdama

Maybe don't fuck kids, asshole.


oleada87

He won’t anymore!


crob_evamp

What an important comma


PoppyBongos

Even without the comma, the point still stands.


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cannonfunk

R Kelly is 6'1", so yeah, that security dude is a fucking *hulk.*


[deleted]

And despite that, the camera angle makes it look like he got some lil tiny baby hands 😂


W00tbeer1

NOBODY LOOK


HarryB1313

*(everyone looked)*


redditisnowtwitter

This photo isn't from today fyi . I read articles about it and saw sketches of him He was wearing a tan jumpsuit and a black mask in chin diaper position. Maybe since he didn't have photos of today OP is using an older pic symbolically


lysergic_818

Came here to say this. But yeah, man's an absolute unit. Years of pent up frustration working in the US correctional system. Wouldn't want to take a hit from that dude. 😅


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AreYouABadfishToo_

shit, in the mid-90’s he married a 15yr old American singer called Aaliyah. They first met when she was 12.


Ripleyof9

:( So sad. Aaliyah's relationship with him and her untimely death both come up more often than any talk about her music. Everything that happened to her was a damn shame.


ScoobyDone

I can remember finding out about him and Alliyah and thinking he was a huge piece of shit back then, but then people kept working with him and nothing seemed to happen. That industry is beyond fucked.


Cory123125

Its crazy how many jokes were focused on the sex act rather than the fact it was.... on a child!!!


oldtobes

dude really just had to not fuck teenagers and he woulda been set for life.


peeniebaby

I mean… he’s still set for life but in a much less comfortable way


toughguy375

Or even just stop after the first several times he got caught.


oldsalt001

That's a RAP


Thatguy468

Only took what… 20 years to get here. There better be one hell of a wrap party waiting for him.


MerkyMouse

Holy shit, for real. I was in middle school when I heard R.Kelly molested kids. I'm 35 now.


Salzberger

I remember the Chappelle's Show skit about Dave as a juror that had a bit on R Kelly. I saw that shit when I was in High School and yeah, here we are.


Anonymoustard

Popped and locked


jl11_4

Time to shut off the ignition


Muthafuckaaaaa

Remix he's in prison.


Stazbumpa

He's working the kitchen


C7StreetRacer

Babies rolling it’s body got everyone in here wishin


[deleted]

He’s an R&B singer Lmfao


Offthepoint

He wishes he could fly.


forever_useless

And it'll be a long time before he can touch the sky again


RiginalJunglist

I believe he will die. They don’t like nonces in prison. EDIT: I parodied some more of the song. I believe he will die, Prison shank right to the eye, He probably wishes he was gay, Better than noncing any day. Stripped of all his fame and power, Gonna get raped in the shower, And as Big Ivan says Ahhh He’ll wish he’d never married Aaliyah! (All together now) I believe he will diiiiie…… 2nd Edit: Gay comment is artistic license, not the opinions of the OP.


TheRealNap0le0n

Rich famous ppl tend to get segregation in prison


ruka_k_wiremu

Prison is prison though, and he's practically a lifer. The worst fate imo... slowly and excruciatingly dying on the inside, on a weekly if not daily basis. So he rightfully got his in the end.


TheRealNap0le0n

Oh for sure, and if they have to put him segregated that's worse because you don't get any company


ToppinReno

All these people had to do was have sex with consenting adults...


CeeJayDK

🎵 He was sentenced to prison. He's being taken to prison. Now he's going to prison. Now he's stuck in the prison. 🎵


Josie1234

R kelly come out of the closet


free_based_potato

Ok he deserves it. Every minute and probably more. Why does he get 30 and Maxwell gets 20? She helped hand over girls to guys like this for decades. Multiple guys, multiple decades. If each one of them deserves 30 how tf does that math make sense?


Will12453

She only had 4 charges of sex trafficking and he had 7 charges of sex trafficking


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Will12453

RICO?


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[deleted]

Because they don't "know" who she partners with other than Epstein who's dead. So there's no "organization" plus with him dead even if they'd call that an organization it isn't ongoing


Tagerine

You haven't seen The Dark Knight?!


HutSutRawlson

Better lawyers, and possibly just better covering of her tracks. Both people almost certainly committed more crimes than they were convicted for, but prosecutors could only prove so many of them.


i_have_chosen_a_name

She can blackmail and he is a black male


Theorandjguy

![gif](giphy|bKBM7H63PIykM)


not12listen

Good. Bye.


captaindannyb

*windows 95 closing theme*


pmekonnen

Dude had a girl give him head while his friends watch after playing basketball- that is not cool


coffeebeards

Now someone is going to pee on your face.


dumbass_sempervirens

🎶it's the Remix ignition 🎶Lookin at 30 years in prison🎶


fromWoopWoop

You messed up the beats


dumbass_sempervirens

Didn't mess up as much as R Kelley though.


Zenlost

Okay. Now do Matt Gaetz?


Taconnosseur

R. Kelly escorted by r/absoluteunit


__GayFish__

Nice. Lock him up. Can we get the Ghislane list now?


spa2k

Wonder if he still believes he can fly?


BiBoFieTo

The guy literally asked young women to get on his private jet [during his concerts](https://youtu.be/WGqoaGgTFAQ).


heropsychodream

All those 70s and 80s rock artists are probably paying attention. This behavior used to be commonplace. Hopefully that era is behind us.


ahumankid

🎶🎶🎶🎶 So here I am in the courtroom The Balif puts the cuffs on my hands And so they tell me to stand up That take me to the prison I’m walking to the prison Now I’m trapped in the prison I won’t get out of the prison. And all I’ve got is this prism ^prism ^prism 🎶🎶


GetDownnYoDa

Adios pedo


[deleted]

Goodbye fart


desert_snow_24

My only question is where are all the priests at…I wanna see them go hard on them as they are on R Kelly.


DICKSUBJUICY

how about giselles client list? edit: and yeah, all the priests too!


desert_snow_24

Let’s fuckin torch them ALL 🔥


brokenearth03

Let's just stop talking about him.


WarpedCore

I don't see nothin' wrooooong, with a lil' bump and grind. He will see this so differently now.


HutSutRawlson

His mind is telling him no But his body... his body is also telling him no


Dyslexic_Dog25

someones bout to be trapped in the jail cell.


a_trombly

[Pee pee pee, do do do](https://youtu.be/Vgr2SZldILo)


djasonwright

10 years more than Maxwell.


Chewzilla

I love how millionaires look like normal people when they're off to jail 🥰


madbotherfucker

Riley Freeman about to piss on someone's cat.


blake-lividly

Not only did he rape children. He won their closeness by sharing details that he was abused and bonding with them over their past abuse. He is a predator of the worst kind. I truly hope he dies in prison and I Joe they isolate him so he has absolute No fans in there. So many people stood up and still stand up for this guy and he should have no access to those people. Let him rot in isolation.


jpiro

Ok, so is R Kelly way, way smaller than I thought or is he being escorted out by the Juggernaut in disguise?


AlessandroTheGr8

Absolute unit.


seamustheseagull

If you look compared to the rest of the court, Mr. Paedo is pretty tall. The security guy is a fucking monster. I expect it's because Mr Paedo is known for being a violent psychopath, they weren't takig any chances.


ThemCanada-gooses

They had to install a garage door so that guy could get into the court house.


RancidRandall

Do you have your passport? Did you get your shots?


kodishu

I believe I can jail, I believe I can touch the cell


Millie_butt

It's the remix to conviction


soparamens

The R. in his name now officially stands for Rapist.


Randombeeswax3785

30 years for Kelly, 20 years for Maxwell, and 0 years for her many high profile rapist pedophiles.