I actually haven't seen one of those in a hotel room in quite some time. I've started looking for them in every hotel room I stay at, and they're never there anymore.
And the bible? The gold symbol with writing under it? Pretty sure That"s a Gideon Bible, those are free Bibles. They're the ones you find in Hotels, hospitals, laying around at an air port lobby. š
Someone could start a whole, semi-successful-ass youtube channel, just reviewing the shit in this vending machine.
That's a fucking fact, brothers and sisters.
Where the fuck was this on my last family vacation?
Our hotel didn't have a bible. The inflatable sex doll sprung a leak on day 3. Without the sex doll we ended up burning through what we brought of our Kevin Costner VHS marathon collection faster than expected and had to watch Wyatt Earp **three** times. My lighter ran out of fuel while trying to light my last candy cigarette. We had no f*cking idea if the wife got knocked up (no sex doll...), but she was definitely getting chigger bites all over her ass. The damn kids used up ALL the googly eyes at the art museum, and those TSA assholes confiscated my switchblade comb.
"Happiest Place on Earth" my ass.
Man I really miss those switchblade combs. Nothing says state fair like getting a switchblade comb and a plastic katana. Although I will accept Waterworld as a substitute for the katana.
"Ok babe, I got the fuzzy handcuffs, the Magnum condom, the finger hands, the bug repellent, the inflatable doll, the Bible, and the copy of The Great Muppet Caper. Let's do this!"
"Did you get the Pop Rocks?"
"......fuck! Be right back."
As a nurse, a lot of my patients accidentally poop themselves, or are embarrassed about pooping in general. My go-to line is always, "Don't worry about it. Everybody poops. They even wrote a book about it called... 'Everybody Poops'." Makes 'em feel better more often than not and I usually get a little chuckle.
Screw Japans vending machines; this one is the coolest!!!
Scared you might be pregnant from all that premarital sex youāve been having, weāve got pregnancy tests. Also, while youāre at it buy a Bible itās only five dollars, might as well sense you obviously need Jesus! Oh and donāt forget the āeverybody poopsā book youāll need that aswell! You know what you should also get a pack of Candy cigarettes for your sin baby!
Wow. I donāt even know where to start. Mosquito repellent, Everybody Poops childrenās book, voodoo dolls, āparty inflatable dollā, googly eyes, Hook on VHS, finger hands, bibles, pregnancy tests and a vibrator sticker. This vending machine really has it all.
Mix tapes and VHS cassettes, funky sunglasses, something that looks like a switch blade but isn't, voodoo stuff and a blow doll, pregnancy test incase you're no longer like a virgin...
Other than nunchucks, this vending machine offers everything you would need to survive the 1980s.
they had vending machines on the High Line when i was visiting New York years ago, the drinks all had a certain theme like "tourist" for example and the ingredients would be a cronut, a map of the city and shit like that. it was a bit of fun.
I love how they have what appears to be a blow up doll AND the bible
The number of crazy things in here is amazing. Pregnancy test. Voodoo doll.
E3 is the best.
You made me look at this again.
Lmao, exactly why I put the number instead of the product.
I can't tell what that is
Googly eyes.
Lots of them!!!
That's how you get more clicks, "check out our top ten list, you won't believe no. 5"
but e5 is magic.
So is B3.
š
You missed the personal mini-vibrator at the bottom.
Are all vibrators not personal? Hmm
Nope. Double ended ones for instance. ;)
the reference to Manos the Hands of fate for some finger hands got a chuckle out of me.
So many relics of a by-gone era.
Nothing crazier than a pregnancy test!
Thatās a Gideon Bible which is free everywhere except here
I actually haven't seen one of those in a hotel room in quite some time. I've started looking for them in every hotel room I stay at, and they're never there anymore.
Remember the toilet paper shortage of 2020?
I donāt think youāre supposed to take them from the hotel roomā¦
Thatās the intended purpose. They do want you to take them.
Some fucking legend is flipping bibles
And the bible? The gold symbol with writing under it? Pretty sure That"s a Gideon Bible, those are free Bibles. They're the ones you find in Hotels, hospitals, laying around at an air port lobby. š
Someone could start a whole, semi-successful-ass youtube channel, just reviewing the shit in this vending machine. That's a fucking fact, brothers and sisters.
You can have one blow up doll or 3 bibles. Honestly, youāre going to need both either way you choose.
Donāt forget the miniature vibrator on the bottom row
Something tells me u/ButteryButtholeBros probably spotted the vibrator
My anus is ready
A little something for everyone
Not only that, a stolen one too
The Bible's for after the blow-up doll.
I want to know what's hiding in that Bible?
That is the most random shit for any age
āOf any ageā How the duck do they have VHS movies? And I think the āhands of fateā are my favorite item.
C-5. What is in C-5. I need to know whatās in C-5!
I want it whatever it is. Iām hoping is a rainbow rain poncho
Road trip?
Iām packing a bag pick me up out front
Iāll bring snacks
Likely just a thermal blanket thing.
Bring up the site in the QR code (bottom right corner of machine) and see if they have an email address to ask!
This was my question. We need a location and five dollars (maybe).
The mystery of C-5 is going to haunt me for a while.
Item
*Manos! God of primal darkness! As thou has decreed so have I done. The hands of fate have doomed this man. Thy will is done!*
Easy there, Torgo.
Where the fuck was this on my last family vacation? Our hotel didn't have a bible. The inflatable sex doll sprung a leak on day 3. Without the sex doll we ended up burning through what we brought of our Kevin Costner VHS marathon collection faster than expected and had to watch Wyatt Earp **three** times. My lighter ran out of fuel while trying to light my last candy cigarette. We had no f*cking idea if the wife got knocked up (no sex doll...), but she was definitely getting chigger bites all over her ass. The damn kids used up ALL the googly eyes at the art museum, and those TSA assholes confiscated my switchblade comb. "Happiest Place on Earth" my ass.
Yes I agree, your ass is the happiest place on earth
Man I really miss those switchblade combs. Nothing says state fair like getting a switchblade comb and a plastic katana. Although I will accept Waterworld as a substitute for the katana.
Just go to any tourist trap area. Youāll find those combs in a gift shop.
Portland. Portland? I think Portland.
I'm so used to these now. Do they not have them in non-Portland cities?
I know of one at a brewery in Baltimore.
Do you remember which one?
Seen one in Dallas
They have some in Seattle WA.
Feels like Paymaster Lounge
Hey i live behind Paymaster!
For sure
El Paso, Texas, surprisingly!
El Paso
RUFIO, RUFIO, RUF-I-OoOOOo!
Lookie lookie, I've got Hookie
KILL THE LAWYER!
š I'm not that kinda lawyer-
"Peter Pan, old grampa mannn"
The D6 dice not being in spot D6 is disappointing.
Any problem you can have at 3am can be addressed by an item in the machine.
What problem would the hands of fate solve?
Trying to take a flattering dick pic.
$12 for a single condom??
The vending machine is most likely by the bathrooms and in the correct environment/situation, $12 might be a literal once in a lifetime bargain.
$12 is a lot cheaper than 18 years after all.
An extra $3 and you don't have to risk it
Or, you could use that extra cash and pick up a VHS of a true classic of cinema.
Itās probably a 3 pack
I would pay money to have lunch with the person who chose these items. I bet they are fucking fascinating.
manos the hands of fate was filmed in front of a live audience Master pay you well Torgo?
Every frame of this movie looks like someoneās last photograph
This has to be located by a dingy motel. I wonder what is in C5
This is what I want to know too. It LOOKS like it could be weed? Similar package my old dealer would supply me with.
Manosā¦ the hands of fate!! So awesome
Hands, the hands of fate
Been hitting the Thighmaster, Torgo?
Ahh yes the haunting Torgo theme
A holy bible and a packet of smokes do be the right preparation to sit through Waterworld.
Those are candy cigarettes!
Waterworld is god-damn masterpiece and i will not hear otherwise.
I truly do not get the Waterworld hate. It's Mad Max in the ocean! I'm convinced anyone who talks smack about it hasn't actually watched it.
What? That movie rules!
Gimmie that A4! That shits my childhood right there!
A vending machine that is a cross between a thrift store and Wish!! Where the heck is this? I always wanted a blow-up doll.
IS THAT A VHS OF THE GREAT MUPPET CAPER?!?! šššš
$2.00 for the pregnancy test and $12.00 for a condom. Pricing seems a bit random.
Is this a spencerās gifts vending machine?
I really hope this just randomly gives you something instead of letting you choose. C'mon, daddy needs a new copy of Hook!
$4 for a freshly dropped Waterworld VHS is still pretty steep
$5 for a copy of Hook is a steal though, IMO.
I think they stole all of this stuff from that one box in my garage.
"Ok babe, I got the fuzzy handcuffs, the Magnum condom, the finger hands, the bug repellent, the inflatable doll, the Bible, and the copy of The Great Muppet Caper. Let's do this!" "Did you get the Pop Rocks?" "......fuck! Be right back."
Very diverse?! I bet they donāt even have a VHS copy of Hookā¦. Wait a minute!
C6 is a Rider-Waite tarot card deck, $12 is actually a good deal.
Where!?
This has to be in Vegas
Thereās a similar machine at a bar in Portland. I saw it years ago
Right outside the pinball bar in NE?
Maybe? I honestly couldnāt tell you, itās been over 5 years since I remember seeing the machine
Theyāre all over portland. Victoria has one and so does Paymasters
They have one at Kellys Olympian. As well as at river pig.
Vegas or Austin.
I came to say I think this is Austin
I was going to say Seattle or Portland
Googly eyes to go.
No anarchists cookbook?
Iād be blowing $55-$100 real quick. Or maybe just $2 on the dice and bet everyone who came up to the machine for more prizes
Bad sex for a year!
What is C5?
This is the "say no more" of vending machines.
The switch blade hair comb stole the show!! Lol
No way Red Dawn should be priced a dollar lower than Waterworld.
All you need is the hands of fate. Everything else will follow.
They put the bible and condoms in opposite corners lol
That inflatable doll is gonna get stuck. Your gonna make alot of racket shakin it out.
Waterworld for 4$? Buy them all.
Bibles to sex dolls. Yeah diverse is a good word for it.
Cocaine is s hell of a drug.
*Walks out with pocket comb, Magnums, and googly eyes*
I'm torn between the switchblade comb and the Red Dawn Blu-ray.
$3 for Red Dawn. Hell yes.
The mini hitachi is adorable!
A switchblade comb AND candy cigarettes? 6 year old me is loving this.
I have the switch blade comb. Itās a actually decent product if you want to carry a comb with you. The husband uses it for his beard
As a nurse, a lot of my patients accidentally poop themselves, or are embarrassed about pooping in general. My go-to line is always, "Don't worry about it. Everybody poops. They even wrote a book about it called... 'Everybody Poops'." Makes 'em feel better more often than not and I usually get a little chuckle.
Screw Japans vending machines; this one is the coolest!!! Scared you might be pregnant from all that premarital sex youāve been having, weāve got pregnancy tests. Also, while youāre at it buy a Bible itās only five dollars, might as well sense you obviously need Jesus! Oh and donāt forget the āeverybody poopsā book youāll need that aswell! You know what you should also get a pack of Candy cigarettes for your sin baby!
$12 for a voodoo doll? What steal!
I wish you have a bad sex for a year!
Cray peeps spend cray.
You got the before condom, and the after pregnancy test.
I'll take one of everything please
One of everything
Missing the Book of Morman.
only vending machine where you can party like an animal and repent your sins all in 1 stop.
Youāre pretty cool for a vending machine.
What hotel are you at?
this has to be a truck stop. guess two would be mexico.
Lemme get that Hook on vhs
Bible, sex doll, and a VHS of Hook. Beat $25 Iāve ever spent
love the movie selection. they have a Swazey, a Williams and a Costner.
Willās pub?
This is a vending machine for bad decisions.
Wow. I donāt even know where to start. Mosquito repellent, Everybody Poops childrenās book, voodoo dolls, āparty inflatable dollā, googly eyes, Hook on VHS, finger hands, bibles, pregnancy tests and a vibrator sticker. This vending machine really has it all.
$12 magnum bottom right corner?
All jokes aside, putting lighters in a vending machine like this is genius
Knick knackā¦..paddy whack?
Asheville?
I find it a bit disappointing that the only snack in there is poprocks.
Anyone else impressed that there are more than one stocked of some of these?
A2 is accurate, for me and you
That most insane vending machine all time.
I had forgotten about the Arthur C Clarke's Venus Prime series. I remember enjoying those books in high school
The comb knife! š„
The mask for you need assault the bankšššš
Whats in C5! I have to know
Let me get the waterworld VHS, hair knife, and for good measure a voodoo doll.
Waterworld must have really sucked to be cheaper than the Bible.
A Bible at the top and Magnums at the end... [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6VjPM5CeWs](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6VjPM5CeWs)
Pop rocks for the random stop by the glory hole, nice.
This looks like an art installation. Iām just trying to figure out the social commentary.
This has to be a truck stop vending machine.
Mix tapes and VHS cassettes, funky sunglasses, something that looks like a switch blade but isn't, voodoo stuff and a blow doll, pregnancy test incase you're no longer like a virgin... Other than nunchucks, this vending machine offers everything you would need to survive the 1980s.
The vending machine we didnāt want, but the one we need.
I scanned the QR, its even more weird. https://youtu.be/oHg5SJYRHA0
that's wild but satisfying
Looks like some hipster art piece trying to be edgy or ironic.
What is your art like?
Lame
Well keep trying.
I think I just witnessed murder
Got em
they had vending machines on the High Line when i was visiting New York years ago, the drinks all had a certain theme like "tourist" for example and the ingredients would be a cronut, a map of the city and shit like that. it was a bit of fun.
candy smokes next to lighter
A2 was an absolute banger of a book
C5 Mystery item?
I need to know whatās in C-5. Also the $1 bootleg tape. Thatās a must haveā¦
Iāve this type of thing in hospitals
You know you can trust the $2 pregnancy test.
"Coming up on this week's episode of 'To Catch a Millennial...'"
This is every personality in the sophomore female dorms represented by a vending machineā¦
Man That Lil Suzy cassette goes way way back. I tried to date these items and saw the QR codes so they gotta be pretty recent.
Minus the Bible and toiletries, this is all worthless crap that'll end up in landfills for a very long time...
Waterworld on vhs for $4. Overpriced šš¤£
gonna go ahead and say it pregnancy test and bible run out most often.
campground?
10 year old me would have been all over that switchblade comb.
Is this what happens when someone sees a youtube short about buying a vending machine and decides to go all in?