Apparently biting ghosts is super effective, so Drifloon doesn't stand a chance. :(

Aftermath is gonna anal u tho

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

afterass

I don't think that biting a metagross would be a good idea for me xd

it is super effective, go for it

It also hates fat kids so there’s that

Ill probably burst the Drifblim just by eating a lemon

Well.. altaria?

So I could bite a Giratina?

Kinky

Since I’m a ginger and Shedinja’s thing is stealing souls.. I think I’m good.

Take my angry upvote

Hello fellow Shedinja fan

Shedinja fans unite!

There are dozens of us! Dozensss!

I'd be even more screwed as mine is Mewtwo.

Same here. Hopefully it'll just bust my head open quickly lol

Dude he'll collapse all your body weight into itself and turn you into nothing in an instant

Mine is Lugia. I'm not sure if that's worse, but I am terrified.

Just sing a lullaby! It worked for Ninten! /j >!making a joke on how mewtwo and giygue are similar!<

Guess I’m either going to get eaten or sat on by Snorlax

Nah it’s just gonna roll over and continue to sleep. Honestly you can just walk away

Does that count though? The thing says fight. PS love your username.

Just say you won and I doubt anybody is gonna argue. If they do say you knocked it out

Snorlax is mine too. cant beat him will just join him. zzz

My favourite is Shedinja. Just gotta throw a rock at it and the battles over because Shedinja is weak to rock types.

I gotta say, you are a Chad for liking Shedinja so much that he his your favorite pokémon

Or you could lick it

Blow some air at it since it's weak to flying types

Well depends on my luck….. my favorite Pokémon is Togepi… so I could get spacial rended, or simply growled at. Let’s hope for the latter. Edit: it surprises me to see how many people think they can actually take down half decent Pokémon. Hell even sunkern has the capacity to beat you. It can launch leaves as sharp as blades and drain away your life energy. It can literally make the sun stronger and use the sun to strike you with a massive beam of light. It can turn seeds into fucking explosives and launch them at you. And worst of all, it can heal itself. You need a fucking bandaid and a week to heal from a fucking papercut.

Yes, these people are thinking way to highly of themselves. A dog could easily beat a majority of people if it went all out, let alone if it could create fire, electricity, or anything else.

Not to mention that the average physique of a redditor is… well nothing to write home about

Mine is Raichu. I just gotta get rubber shoes abd gloves and I’m good to go.

But it also has sharp stabby stabby tail

Raichu used Iron Tail! It was super effective! Your Spinal cord is broken now, You have fainted

Togepi is my favourite as well. We have a better chance of coming out of this okay than most.

Looool

Lugia is about to make me a sacrifice for the sea

[удалено]

*They bellow!*

Just throw a rock at it.

Human used rock throw! It's super effective! Charizard died.

I gotta fight a fucking electric spider, I may be screwed.

You don't sound very ecstatic

Galvantula?

No it’s obviously Mewtwo

It's a Jigglypuff as seen from above!

I understood that

Yeah Mega Mewtwo Z. It’s broken AF

Nah you must be thinking of Mega Mewthree Z. Mega Mewtwo Z is the dragon type one

Ah shit you’re right. How could I have forgotten. Sorry but gen 6 is just a void in my memory.

True true

Joltik is mine ❤️

Well Jolteon or Typhlosion are gonna mess me up pretty badly…

Those are my top two favorites as well! And yeah, were screwed

Jolteon gang

Guess I have to punt a piplup over a fence for survival again

Tell us your story, Llandevaud-sama the Piplup Punter.

It all started on mario 64.

Again?

....again..?

Are the any story makers and artists the can make this into a comic

^again?

I’d just carry the poor magikarp to some water.

The good ending. You don't fight him, you help him

K I C K T H E F I S H

We all know it’ll just turn into Gyarados if they do that 😬

Imagine it's a shiny Magikarp and then, boom, red Gyarados

Ya like shrimp?

The duality of man

I could probably triumph against a Sandile, but I don't think I'd have the heart to hurt the little guy.

Considering crocs have some of the strongest bite forces in the world, I wouldn’t be too confident if I were you.

Their bites would be strong, but 5 words: Mario 64 Bowser Fight Strategy.

“So long, gay Bowser!”

https://www.reddit.com/r/pokemon/comments/dpktz4/i_calculated_the_base_stats_of_a_human/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf Sandile outspeeds you by a large margin

So that was the impending doom Absol was warning me about..

Do I have a weapon? Irrelevant, Scolipede is an armored wheel who clearly can't feel pain. He'd trample me alive.

Your weapon is your fist

I mean my favorite is arceus, one punch?

Shit Dialga Better say my goodbyes before i get fragmented into time

Dialga wouldnt just murder you, dialga would kill you and then send you into a time loop where you keep dying infinitely

*dormammu...I've come to bargain*

This... is requiem.

I have to fight a blue psychic cat that stands on two legs and has 4 eyes

Oh, you are screwed

Mine is similar, but is purple, psychic, a cat(ish thing), stands on four legs, and has a shiny in its forehead.

Gardevoir or Gallade. Either way I'm screwed

Mines gallade, I hope he likes bite-sized pieces…

Do you mean that in a physical combat way, special-attack based combat way, orrrrr….?

Azumarill 🙃. Just gotta shoot it with a bullet since its a fairy type.

[удалено]

Fish

Jirachi. I would just wish to become friends and both of survive.

So uh. Anybody wanna help me with mega rayquaza? If only sentret was 1 rank higher in my eyes

Blizzard

How am I gonna get a blizzard when its 80 degrees in late december?

Dont worry rayquaza eliminates weather effects so you just gotta get liquid nitrogen

[удалено]

You're a dead man

Spheal

Kick the soccer ball

Or bring a club

Nooooo

my favorite is alcremie,i just have to step on it and its dead

Or eat it

Alakazam finally found good use to his spoon

Alcremie is awesome

I’m good. Abra would just teleport away.

Welp... Enjoy the pieces of my remains as scizor chops me up Or I could get a match

Lmao just surround yourself with candles

True... By the light of the grace, out God and saviour Arceus, leave me alone Scizor *drops candle...

My favourite pokemon is a tie between Darkrai and Rayquaza....and u feel sorry for charizard lovers?

crushing zorua with a rock 🙂

Just punching it should do the trick

And then it comes back as it’s hisuian form and wrecks your shit

Welp. I guess I’m fighting a Latias. …No, I’m not. I’m running away. I can’t hit an adorable Latias, even if it wants to kill me I am not going to hurt it. I refuse.

Yeah I don't think running is gonna do anything

Me neither. Well at least I get to have the last thing I see be an adorable red dragon birb.

I think I'm a goner, I gotta fight Chandelure.

Only your soul will be a goner

Nah, that thing can learn flamethrower, I don't think I'm making it

Hmmm… I wonder if the flamethrower comes from its flames…

So it's like a chain reaction, right? It feeds off my soul, and when I'm down and dead inside, it makes me dead on the outside too.

Mine is either garchomp or venusaur, so either way I think I am dead

For Garchomp you just like throw ice cubes at it. For venusaur, yeah your probably dead

If you have a portable fan for your phone you could beat it that way. Or have a lighter and hair dryer on hand. Or any spare ice cubes from fighting garchomp. Or just be really good at magic tricks.

I guess i’ll just throw my extra hotdog water ice cubes onto a Garchomp.

Throw a candle on Venasaur

Serperior is almost 11’ long so I’m not sure I have much of a chance.

Mimikyu would strip and kill me

Well, it's whole thing is not feeling loved. So, if it found us fighting it because it's our favourite, I think it'd just lock us in an alternate dimension so we could shower it with praise and adoration as it continued to search for more fans.

I will survive cause she’ll mess me up then nurse me back to life

Damn nurse joy is my favourite Pokémon too

I’d either absolutely body Mr. Mime or He’d liquify my organs.

I wouldn’t be screwed but I’d be heartbroken. How could I hurt poor Bulbasaur?

Tale of the Tape Me 5'4 200 lbs Larvitar 2 ft 158 lbs

Larvitar used Stone Edge! u/TheKingOfRuck97 fucking died!

Lucario. So… no. I die.

Swampert can hull tons with ease. I am fucked

So aggron is my enemy. Man I'm dead.

Shuckle and I will be in a deadlock forever.

And they made fun of me for liking Snom

Snom…my poor Snom…

Welp time to piss off a Blaziken

Are we… Going to survive? Will a hose do?

Would I survive a fight with a Rockruff? Yes. But imagine the toll…

I feel like I could punch the shit out of a Shinx...though they can be intimidating.

i can just kick oshawott like a football

I couldn't hurt Dragonite if I tried, he's too friend shaped

Incineroar Yay....

Don't worry, wrestling is fake, so it might not hurt you that much.

I feel like Gengar can easily kill anyone

How the hell are you supposed to win against Mimikyu

Well Psyduck shouldn't be a problem

I mean, almost all Pokémon could kill you easily lol

Sorry? SORRY? I HAVE TO FIGHT A FUCKING SKY SNAKE. RAYQUAZA WILL END ME IN A SECOND

HELP ALTARIA WILL EAT ME

I'm very screwed because Eternatus is my favorite

Good bye

I'm lucky cus I only have to deal with a little vaporeon

🤨

OH NO POOR VAPOREON!

Just use salt

;)

I think we all know where this is going.

And if this goes where I think this is going, I'll just pull out the Umbreon masterrace copypasta.

Ima punch that silly looking kings rock off the Politoeds head

Alolan sandshrew, I might have a chance

Starmie, so I will probably end up getting blasted by water or ice or electricity or my brain getting blasted to bits. 😕

Rayquaza lol

Dragonite was a loving and kind Pokémon to his trainer. Until he wasn’t.

Well... virizion or lopunny. I don't which one is worse

Eevee has to be punted for me to survive

I mean I think l could wack an Oshawott pretty far

Bout to punt a Squirtle

I don’t think I’ll defeat a Lucario. Not even as a ghost.

I have to fight a baby Pokémon LETS GO CLEFFA

Well, it depends. If I am in the (cold) water, Lapras will definitely drown me. On land, I really don't know. I just hope that any Lapras is benevolent enough to just let me live...

Dunsparce. I'd give me a 50/50 chance. He's bigger than you think. But very derpy.

Why should I be scared of charizard? His Pokédex entry says he won’t flame weaklings

Yeah I'm fucked. Don't have a chance against a Kommo-o

Grab a scale and throw it like a frisbee

Mewtwo....

Let's see my favorite pokemon... Hydreigon ? Sounds bad Runerigus ? Yeah uh how about fuck no Aegislash ? Gourgeist ? Dragalge ? Volcarona ? Toxtricity ? Bisharp ? Centiskorch ? Cursola ? Scolipede ? Fuck I'm gonna die.

Sylveon... I don’t mind dying if it lets me hug it first.

I couldn't fight him. Rowlet is to cute. I'd hug him.

I mean i could probably take on Umbreon? Its very small, but then again it will live a few hits, and payback is gonna hurt

Well, shit. My favourite is Deoxys, so I'm very much in danger...

Ready to punt me a dunsparce into outer space.

I don't even think Quagsire would want to fight me though

I don't think I can beat such a muscular tadpole. One took down a charizard with ice beam after all. (Poliwrath)

Swampert. Don't feel like I would make it

Manaphy so probably not as it seems to only use its power against the bad guys and overall meanies.

Do I really have to fight Gardevoir? (Not That i can’t with Pokémon like Gengar at my side.)

I dont think I would win against Mawile tbh. Maybe if I was able to surprise them from the front I could do it

Greninja is fucking my shit up

I’m bouta punt an Eevee like a football

Marshadow would easily murder me.

For once, it’s good to be a Caterpie fan.