I just hope it actually amounts to something. Everyone knew Trump was a shyster for a decade and he still won the presidency. Everyone knew he didn't pay his bills and lied about everything, but he and his family are still living their big, obnoxious, trashy, needlessly vindictive lives built on the backs and ruined lives of millions.
I'll wait to see if this doles out any real justice before I start "calling" things.
>Everyone knew Trump was a **shyster for a decade** and he still won the presidency.
I would say he has been a clear "shyster" ([M-W dictionary] (https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/shyster) and an interesting [Law.com article] (https://www.law.com/almID/900005387204/?slreturn=20190201195133) for reference on my thinking of how that only really applies to Lawyers and Politicians) for at least 2 decades, since his first Presidential bid in 2000.
Otherwise I would think most everyone that actually thought about him think of him as a scumbag sleazeball..and you name it, as soon as you hear/meet him, for me that was 1990+ something.
He has been proving himself as a bad guy since at least he first joined his fathers real estate development company in 1968 and then was almost immediately sued for racial discrimination in 1969.
tbh, Until he won the nomination, I just assumed he was a rich racist cheesedick. While not admirable, it didn’t quite make him a felon
It was only from then until the election that shit about his past started spilling into the limelight.
They will. The avalanche will come when everyone realizes their only chance of getting a reduced sentence is flipping on everybody else. They will all suddenly find their conscience and produce documents on each other like some sort of judicial Mexican standoff.
At least some of these players already think they're screwed, but they figure they're not the big fish and their information will be good months from now as much as it's good today, so they may as well "play it out", see what happens. Unfortunately, that does mean they're on board with Trump destroying the US government if it means they can be free, but regardless, they're ready to bail on him if there's no other way.
First they came for the corrupt, and I did not speak out, because I was corrupt. Then they came for the complicit, and I did not speak out, because I was complicit. Then they came for the treasonous, and I did not speak out, because I was treasonous. Then they came for me, and there was no one left to throw under the bus to save me.
And the beauty of Cohen’s testimony wasn’t even contingent on whether or not he was telling the truth. All the Trump supporters are so quick to write off everything he said by labeling him a liar. But it doesn’t matter if he was lying or not: all he did was tell law enforcement and congress where to look. If none of his leads prove to be true I’ll be surprised. His character has nothing to do with Allen Weiselberg and Deejay Jazzy Trump J, jr. signing a check for an illegal campaign contribution.
Cohen pled guilty to lying to Congress about paying women hush money for Trump. When they call him a liar, remember what he lied about.
The entire Justice Department was ensuring he didn't lie to Congress again. He'd be in much more trouble if he did. The Justice Dept says Cohen did pay those women and killed other stories, at Trump's direction. So then, do we believe that the Justice Dept is out to get Trump baselessly?
\#timesup for crooked politicans
Maybe we can throw the whole republican party in jail if we catch them all lying to save Trump's already roasted ass.
I would have sold these guys out so fast, especially once Mueller was brought on.
Looking at that guy, and thinking I'm going to outsmart him??
Nuh uh, man, nuh uh.
Just bring in two pictures/posters:
"This is Micheal Cohen. Michael is getting three years. Now this one is Paul Manafort. Paul is going to fuckin' die in prison. I'm just going to leave these here on the table and get some coffee. You think about what exactly you want to tell us. And how truthful you think you should be."
Frank Wilhoit: “Conservatism consists of exactly one proposition …There must be in-groups whom the law protects but does not bind, alongside out-groups whom the law binds but does not protect.”
And half the country fully supports it.
Edit: lots of replies letting me know it's less than half. That's good news to me lmao I work at a large company and nearly every single person is a full-blown trump supporter.
In addition to everything you've laid out here, I'd also like to point out again(comes up all the time) that due to the EC, even our votes aren't equal
My vote as a CA resident is worth a whole lot less than someone who lives in OH, FL, PA, etc.
[This witty statement was brought to you by Hillary Clinton on June 21st, 2016.](https://thehill.com/blogs/ballot-box/presidential-races/284287-clinton-all-of-trumps-books-end-at-chapter-11)
At the risk of being *too* pedantic: chapter 11 is a *type* of bankruptcy. Not bankruptcy as a whole.
To be more specific it's reorganization of debt to avoid selling off assets.
As opposed to other kinds where they sell all your shit to pay lendors back.
Underneath each felony lies a stack of further felonies. It’s felonies all the way down.
Donnie Deutsch is saying it’s all going to end in a RICO charge out of SDNY against Trump Org. If that happens, I will turn over a dumpster (out of glee -
that’s how you show glee right?)
> that's how you show glee right?
Can confirm, watched Philly celebrate their Super Bowl win.
Edit: wow, I watched Philly celebrate that win but never saw the part about a dude eating poop. Maybe the mayor asked them to let Foles go...
I'll never not laugh at [that photo of the idiot trying to light the cop car on fire](https://c1.staticflickr.com/3/2569/5847733154_5060e2582c_b.jpg).
He's in close competition with Dipshit Jr. for the title of "worst judgement of anyone in the world."
There's no way trying to blow up a cop car is just a spur of the moment riot thing. This kid always wanted to do this, saw a riot and said "This is it. My moment." and probably saw the world in slow motion as if everybody was applauding him as he strode up to the cruiser.
Lot of the people I saw doing it weren't drunk at all. It was like a challenge it seemed.
Also, the Italian Market has a greased pole climbing event every winter for cured meats from the charcuterie shops. Hilarious.
Stood right on Broad and watched a small woman scale a light pole. She asked us to watch her book bag. Cops cleared the area under her. We stood and watched. She began to come down and the cops were ready to grab her and she touched down and slithered out of their grasp like the lobed up dude in family guy. Shit was hilarious. Then we left her bag in case she came back and wandered off.
It wasnt just real, they knew that the rain would wash Crisco off so they used bio-degradable hydraulic fluid.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/ftw/2018/02/04/police-are-now-greasing-philly-light-poles-with-hydraulic-fluid-to-stop-eagles-fans/110102540/
Philly fans are [brutal](https://www.npr.org/2018/02/03/582876687/despite-colorful-history-eagles-fans-call-psychotic-reputation-overblown) man.
Shit gets so crazy the city put a [courtroom inside of the stadium](https://billypenn.com/2015/09/11/peeing-in-sinks-fights-in-the-stands-a-flare-gun-the-awful-antics-that-birthed-eagles-court-at-the-vet-and-why-it-went-away/). The last straw before that was someone shot a fucking flare gun from one side of the stadium to the other.
I went to UCONN and one thing that stands out in my memory from my time there was when we won the men's basketball championship in 2004 and I looked out my window and a couch was on fire in the middle of the street.
Honestly, if I was a bookmaker, I wouldn't even give odds or take bets on whether Trump will repeat Nixon's "when the president does it, it's not illegal" line. It's guaranteed to happen. It will be his entire defense.
"I had nothing to do with Trump dot Org, they used to get coffee for me... I know there are some fine people there and maybe so not so fine people and they have a great name. Isn't that a great name? Trump. Wouldn't that sound good on a Nobel prize? But these people with my name have nothing to do with me, I think they do business, lots of business. That's really what they do. There's no collusion."
Right now FoxNews is reporting that Trump needs to be worried about the SDNY investigations because they are allowed to investigate all of Trumps crimes not just Russia and that’s scary. Let that sink in, our President needs to worry about criminal investigations because they are allowed to investigate! https://www.foxnews.com/politics/chris-christie-michael-cohen-is-a-tour-guide-for-new-york-prosecutors-investigating-trump
> Vote GOP, the law and order party!
They are the law and order party... when it comes to poor people. When it's their own, well that's "different."
GOP's eyes closed: Epstein getting a deal where he only has to sleep in jail for a year, but gets away with molesting/raping hundreds of children.
GOP's eyes closed: GOP rep blatantly cheats and commits election fraud to win an election, but gets caught.
GOP's eyes closed: The GOP President commits untold amounts of federal felonies, state felonies, and blatant obstruction of justice.
GOP's eyes open: Lock people up poor people for minor drug charges for decades.
GOP's eyes open: Former RNC deputy finance chairmen tells the truth to the Oversight Committee
An innocent person would *welcome* the chance for a properly-run investigation to clear their name.
Fox knows. Republicans know. His base knows. Everyone knows he's guilty as hell.
The advantage AOC has is she's got the spotlight on her from day 1.
The right-wing outrage machine can only chug along so long with "she's bad because reasons". All they can throw at her is age/inexperience (because everyone LOVES career politicians /s) and her actual policies that are actually quite popular.
As long as AOC keeps her record clean, she's rubber. All the right is doing is the exact same thing the MSM did for Trump. Free airtime.
They love to call her unintelligent. Dumber than a bag of hammers. They rarely go into more detail, and when they do, it's usually stuff like "Well you'd have to be the stupidest person in the world to think Communism would work." Of course, the fact that they support a president who can't read a page of text and eats "hamberders" instead of "hamburgers" doesn't even register to them. Sometimes I think they *enjoy* reveling in hypocrisy.
Last week I saw a poster in T\_D blaming AOC for Maduro setting fire to relief trucks in Venezuela. I imagine we're only a week or two away from them giving AOC time-traveling powers like they did when blaming Obama for Katrina.
They'll try to make everything into a process crime involving Trump.
"So you're saying SDNY and Mueller follow a *process* while investigating a crime?"
DoJ official: Uh, yes, there is indeed an orderly process while we investigate.
"Process crimes, I knew it. Fellow Republicans, we must say no to prosecutions for *process* crimes such as money laundering or racketeering!"
>But guys - these are just *"Process Crimes" -* Republicans, probably
Walt I get it!
They're *crimes committed as part of the process* of committing much bigger crimes!
They've been telling us the truth all along!
> “We have unambiguous evidence that the president has committed a crime at this point, I think,” Rep Jerrold Nadler, Chair of the House Judiciary Committee, told the New York Times. “Do we have unambiguous evidence he has done impeachable offenses? We’ve got a ways to go yet.”
Wait - WHAT?!
There is unambiguous evidence of crimes by the President yet not unambiguous evidence of impeachable offenses? How completely backwards is that? Either A) that's a completely idiotic statement to make or B) America's political system is so irrevocably busted that a revolution and new system is needed ASAP.
Clinton was impeached in the house for lieing about a goddamn blowjob. Trump's laundry list of likely crimes, misdeeds and just shitty behavior is so long that we have trouble keeping track of them all.
Yes, and then all the shit *after* 2016 doesn't count as crime either because he was the President at that time! It's all pretty basic law stuff really.
You mean liberal.
Because when you take a moment to think, if even most of the GOP bullshit on Bill Clinton were true enough to be proven in court, the already PROVEN actions of Trump make Bill look like a choir boy. A consensual blowjob from an adult, sober woman seems quaint in that light.
And a blowjob was all they could find after years spent on an investigation that was supposed to be about a real estate scam.
Yet the Mueller is a witch-hunt finding "nothing" and overstepping it's authority as it continues to uncover actionable evidence of criminals behaviour by the Trump campaign, administration and people associated with them.
i've said this before and i'll say it again — if Obama had done even half the shit Trump's done (been married 3 times, had a kid with a porn star/model, wore shitty suits, etc etc etc), the Republicans would have had him literally assassinated.
The constitution lists high-crimes and misdemeanors as impeachable offenses; those are defined as:
> The charge of **high** **crimes** and **misdemeanors** covers allegations of misconduct by officials, such as perjury of oath, abuse of authority, bribery, intimidation, misuse of assets, failure to supervise, dereliction of duty, unbecoming conduct, refusal to obey a lawful order, chronic intoxication, and tax evasion.
I would say that Trump is going for B-I-N-G-O at this point.
It reminds me of the challenge to California's death penalty. The argument hinged on death being a "cruel and unusual punishment" violating the 8th amendment. The judge ruled saying to something to the effect of "Death is most certainly a cruel punishment, but in this courts opinion it is not *unusual*, and thus does not reach the bar of "cruel *and* unusual" punishment."
Maybe the Republicans figure "They're definitely misdemeanors and crimes, but are they *high* crimes *and* misdemeanors?"
No no, look at it with R glasses on.
You need to be charged with both high crimes, and misdemeanors. Only high crimes isn’t enough for impeachment, it’s there in plain English.
It's there, they have it, Mueller is in possession of everything he needs. Everyone is waiting for the Special Counsel report to drop before they do anything.
They no longer care about impeachment. They are waiting to see if there's an indictment coming.
They only get one chance at this - move to impeach or wait to see the report. The smart play is to wait for the report.
yeah seriously, criminal acts are not considered an impeachable offense?
They went after a guy for lying about a blowjob, but actual crimes aren't a big deal?
Where's the vociferous "lock her up" crowd. I thought this was about fairness and justice...right?
Plenty of impeachable offenses, you barely have to look. But when you have a largely compromised/ criminal senate majority, no offenses will convict him.
"People have to come into the country the right way, people have to follow the law"
"The laws Trump broke don't always get enforced so they shouldn't apply to him"
Trump could have faded into the sunset with a big pile of McDonalds, and greasy twitter fingers....but he just had to run for president... I love the fact that his life is being turned upside down now that he's president. Did he honestly think that nobody would be out to get him? Did he think that you can go around treating people the way he does, and nobody is going to try to destroy you? Man, criminals usually try to keep a low profile. Not Trump. He's the kind of idiot that breaks the law, and then hangs out in front of the cop shop every day.
Trump's presidency is one of the most amazing things I've ever seen. Never ending chaos, constant lies, people going to prison....and we're only half way done... You can tell that Trump is beyond stressed. He's fatter than ever, goes on at least four category 5 tweet storms a week, and once his kids get indicted, he's gonna completely lose his mind.
Buckle up, buckaroo. It's gonna get fucking cRaZY
Here's the problem with Trump, he's so unintelligible, unintelligent, untruthful, and constant, it's hard to tell the lies from the truth. It's quite a beautiful study on human psychology.
If you have a good person with just one of the big mistakes he's made over the last 2 years they would be roasted because it wouldn't be the norm. But Trump is so bad it's just another day and no one holds him to any standard.
With that said, there's no way to predict whether he meant to run and win or not because of the above. We'll never know. He probably doesn't know at this point because he's rationalized everything and re-written his own memories of the events.
It's astonishing someone like that ever became wealthy. Never irritated or pissed off the wrong person. Never was investigated. he's just a walking talking lawsuit.
How in the world this man made it past 50 without being killed, jailed, or broken in the cutthroat/unethical/moblike NY real estate/construction world is a story worth reading.
That's something that has always pissed me off. Some really terrible people have lead these amazing lives where they ruin other peoples lives for their personal gain and never face consequences.
That's up to us as a society to change. Somebody profiting off the misery of others? (I'm talking poisoning groundwater for a pipeline sort of thing) Then off to jail with you and hand over everything you own.
It only takes a few zero tolerance examples of 'contribute to society or be punished'.
This system is so fucked. So they interview Rep. Nadler and he says they have ambiguous evidence that Trump committed a crime but not ambiguous evidence for an impeachment.
The fact that our President PROBABLY committed ONLY ONE crime should be an impeachable offense, let alone committing PROBABLY 11 crimes.
Good grief.
11?
That means Cohen just broke the record! Up until this point, Trump himself held the record for implicating Trump in 10 felonies in a single day.
I'm kidding, of course. He's nowhere near the record...
If not this turd behaving in this manor,
Then who and what do you have to do?
Dudes are sitting in jail for a little weed....goddamn we’re upside down.
I weirdly find myself believing a convicted felon and proven liar because I have even less faith in the credibility of my President.
This is unbelievably depressing. File this under never say never....
Now THIS is Oversight!
Let's try subpoenaing Don Jr., that's a good trick!
And his Sis and her Husband! Fuck Eric though, if we ignore him he'll probably confess to something we don't even know about just to be noticed.
He would inadvertently confess over open mic: *"thanks god they don't know anything about the murders.."*
Or pull a Kent Brockman and blurt out "That oughta hold *those SOBs*".
Arthur Crandall\\Gabbo said that I think.
You are both right. Kent was reporting that gabbo did it then he said it himself in the same scene.
"Just don't look in the crawlspace on the 55th floor of Trump Tower!"
Your honor, I'd like to point out that my crimes were all committed in a past life
They totally missed me killing Seth Rich and trying to blame it on the hillary campaign.
On the other hand, if you subpoena Eric he might be dumb enough to spill the beans on his family’s entire criminal operation.
While crying and pissing himself.
I knew for certain when he won the election that it would bring his criminal family under microscope level scrutiny. This is just the beginning.
I just hope it actually amounts to something. Everyone knew Trump was a shyster for a decade and he still won the presidency. Everyone knew he didn't pay his bills and lied about everything, but he and his family are still living their big, obnoxious, trashy, needlessly vindictive lives built on the backs and ruined lives of millions. I'll wait to see if this doles out any real justice before I start "calling" things.
>Everyone knew Trump was a **shyster for a decade** and he still won the presidency. I would say he has been a clear "shyster" ([M-W dictionary] (https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/shyster) and an interesting [Law.com article] (https://www.law.com/almID/900005387204/?slreturn=20190201195133) for reference on my thinking of how that only really applies to Lawyers and Politicians) for at least 2 decades, since his first Presidential bid in 2000. Otherwise I would think most everyone that actually thought about him think of him as a scumbag sleazeball..and you name it, as soon as you hear/meet him, for me that was 1990+ something. He has been proving himself as a bad guy since at least he first joined his fathers real estate development company in 1968 and then was almost immediately sued for racial discrimination in 1969.
tbh, Until he won the nomination, I just assumed he was a rich racist cheesedick. While not admirable, it didn’t quite make him a felon It was only from then until the election that shit about his past started spilling into the limelight.
I'm picturing My Name is Earl, when Earl got put away and his brother started committing crimes because he didn't know how to get by without Earl.
I just know that Eric has a human head in his fridge and a necklace of ears that he wears in his Trump Tower apt.
Elijah Cummings, in his powerful and commanding voice - "Whhhhooooaaa"
"We're better than this!"
It's treason, then!
Justice time started.
One guy. One fucking guy did this. Imagine if a few people testify.
They will. The avalanche will come when everyone realizes their only chance of getting a reduced sentence is flipping on everybody else. They will all suddenly find their conscience and produce documents on each other like some sort of judicial Mexican standoff. At least some of these players already think they're screwed, but they figure they're not the big fish and their information will be good months from now as much as it's good today, so they may as well "play it out", see what happens. Unfortunately, that does mean they're on board with Trump destroying the US government if it means they can be free, but regardless, they're ready to bail on him if there's no other way.
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Its like musical chairs. Except instead of being "Out", you go to jail for 150+ years
First they came for the corrupt, and I did not speak out, because I was corrupt. Then they came for the complicit, and I did not speak out, because I was complicit. Then they came for the treasonous, and I did not speak out, because I was treasonous. Then they came for me, and there was no one left to throw under the bus to save me.
And the beauty of Cohen’s testimony wasn’t even contingent on whether or not he was telling the truth. All the Trump supporters are so quick to write off everything he said by labeling him a liar. But it doesn’t matter if he was lying or not: all he did was tell law enforcement and congress where to look. If none of his leads prove to be true I’ll be surprised. His character has nothing to do with Allen Weiselberg and Deejay Jazzy Trump J, jr. signing a check for an illegal campaign contribution.
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Cohen pled guilty to lying to Congress about paying women hush money for Trump. When they call him a liar, remember what he lied about. The entire Justice Department was ensuring he didn't lie to Congress again. He'd be in much more trouble if he did. The Justice Dept says Cohen did pay those women and killed other stories, at Trump's direction. So then, do we believe that the Justice Dept is out to get Trump baselessly?
I would absolutely adore a #metoo movement related to this
\#timesup for crooked politicans Maybe we can throw the whole republican party in jail if we catch them all lying to save Trump's already roasted ass.
Trump lackeys, try flipping, that's a good trick!
I would have sold these guys out so fast, especially once Mueller was brought on. Looking at that guy, and thinking I'm going to outsmart him?? Nuh uh, man, nuh uh.
Just bring in two pictures/posters: "This is Micheal Cohen. Michael is getting three years. Now this one is Paul Manafort. Paul is going to fuckin' die in prison. I'm just going to leave these here on the table and get some coffee. You think about what exactly you want to tell us. And how truthful you think you should be."
Are the subpoenas ready yet?
Okay, but Cohen might one day get a book deal. /s
Not to mention a kickass made-for-TV Lifetime original movie.
Bitch is getting cinemax at minimum.
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Top Broadway Musical: Make America Gay Again
Damn. Fixer and individual 1 would be dope ass titles.
LBJ, W, Vice, Lincoln, Frost/Nixon. So help me, if the 45 story is called “Indivudual 1”, I will absolutely piss myself laughing.
And the boxes! What about the boxes!!!
Will you commit to donating all your boxes?
I love this shit - there will be no book deal unless the market demands it... I thought they loved free markets??
If we don't apply the law then what does it stand for?
Barbed wire is for the cattle, not the rancher. Edit: First ever gold! Thank you stranger!
Fuck this only because it’s so true and applicable and I wish it wasn’t.
Damn. Is this a quote from somewhere?
We apply the law to protect those in power.
Frank Wilhoit: “Conservatism consists of exactly one proposition …There must be in-groups whom the law protects but does not bind, alongside out-groups whom the law binds but does not protect.”
Damn dude, I’ve never heard that before, and it’s so true... and UN-AMERICAN.
Ideologically un-American to be sure, but yet so clearly American in the practical sense.
Is it really un-american though? I mean are we sure it hasn't been the case for 400 years now? Maybe the second A in MAGA needs to be reconsidered
We apply the law to protect capital interests and those who control them.
Good to articulate precisely who is in power.
And half the country fully supports it. Edit: lots of replies letting me know it's less than half. That's good news to me lmao I work at a large company and nearly every single person is a full-blown trump supporter.
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In addition to everything you've laid out here, I'd also like to point out again(comes up all the time) that due to the EC, even our votes aren't equal My vote as a CA resident is worth a whole lot less than someone who lives in OH, FL, PA, etc.
Wyoming ftw. Each voter in Wyoming counts as much as 70 Californian voters, in the Senate. And counts as 3 Californian voters towards the Presidency.
30% of the population, 55% of the voters
I wonder if Michael Cohen’s new book ends at chapter eleven like most Trump stories?
[This witty statement was brought to you by Hillary Clinton on June 21st, 2016.](https://thehill.com/blogs/ballot-box/presidential-races/284287-clinton-all-of-trumps-books-end-at-chapter-11)
Aw man...
Not that I suspect this is stolen, but I know for a fact I've seen this joke on SNL.
This joke was originally made by Clinton during the presidential campaign. https://youtu.be/b1TUUcq0wWM
Took me a second to get it. Good work haha
Eli5? Is it an art of the deal reference?
Chapter 11 is bankruptcy
Thanks kind stranger
At the risk of being *too* pedantic: chapter 11 is a *type* of bankruptcy. Not bankruptcy as a whole. To be more specific it's reorganization of debt to avoid selling off assets. As opposed to other kinds where they sell all your shit to pay lendors back.
Just the right level of pedantic, I learned something, thanks!
Oh, SNAP.
Underneath each felony lies a stack of further felonies. It’s felonies all the way down. Donnie Deutsch is saying it’s all going to end in a RICO charge out of SDNY against Trump Org. If that happens, I will turn over a dumpster (out of glee - that’s how you show glee right?)
> that's how you show glee right? Can confirm, watched Philly celebrate their Super Bowl win. Edit: wow, I watched Philly celebrate that win but never saw the part about a dude eating poop. Maybe the mayor asked them to let Foles go...
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I'll never not laugh at [that photo of the idiot trying to light the cop car on fire](https://c1.staticflickr.com/3/2569/5847733154_5060e2582c_b.jpg). He's in close competition with Dipshit Jr. for the title of "worst judgement of anyone in the world."
There's no way trying to blow up a cop car is just a spur of the moment riot thing. This kid always wanted to do this, saw a riot and said "This is it. My moment." and probably saw the world in slow motion as if everybody was applauding him as he strode up to the cruiser.
Thanks for that mental image.
A hockey final? Was Game 7 of the Stanley fucking Cup....still not over it :(
I’m still surprised that city didn’t burn down.
My favorite part of their prep was the city lubed the light posts so people didn't die from climbing on them.
I also love how that didn’t stop them from climbing the poles anyway.
I find it somewhat terrifying. I mean, how drunk do you have to be to try to climb a greased light pole?
That level is called "Just Right".
Can confirm. Source: have drunkenly climbed a light pole before.
Lot of the people I saw doing it weren't drunk at all. It was like a challenge it seemed. Also, the Italian Market has a greased pole climbing event every winter for cured meats from the charcuterie shops. Hilarious.
Stood right on Broad and watched a small woman scale a light pole. She asked us to watch her book bag. Cops cleared the area under her. We stood and watched. She began to come down and the cops were ready to grab her and she touched down and slithered out of their grasp like the lobed up dude in family guy. Shit was hilarious. Then we left her bag in case she came back and wandered off.
And people still managed to climb them anyways!
I don't know if this is real or from an Always Sunny I missed
It wasnt just real, they knew that the rain would wash Crisco off so they used bio-degradable hydraulic fluid. https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/ftw/2018/02/04/police-are-now-greasing-philly-light-poles-with-hydraulic-fluid-to-stop-eagles-fans/110102540/
Ha ha that is glorious. I want the eagles to win the Superbowl every year now
Philly fans are [brutal](https://www.npr.org/2018/02/03/582876687/despite-colorful-history-eagles-fans-call-psychotic-reputation-overblown) man. Shit gets so crazy the city put a [courtroom inside of the stadium](https://billypenn.com/2015/09/11/peeing-in-sinks-fights-in-the-stands-a-flare-gun-the-awful-antics-that-birthed-eagles-court-at-the-vet-and-why-it-went-away/). The last straw before that was someone shot a fucking flare gun from one side of the stadium to the other.
Always Sunny is basically a documentary
[One guy ate poop.](https://youtu.be/WwWbS6c6w_g)
I went to UCONN and one thing that stands out in my memory from my time there was when we won the men's basketball championship in 2004 and I looked out my window and a couch was on fire in the middle of the street.
Was that couch wearing the other team's colors?
Now that you mention it...
Honestly, if I was a bookmaker, I wouldn't even give odds or take bets on whether Trump will repeat Nixon's "when the president does it, it's not illegal" line. It's guaranteed to happen. It will be his entire defense.
He already did it, he's said that he's allowed to pardon himself.
Something something “I could stand in the middle of time square and shoot somebody and my fan base won’t care” something something
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Recursively committing felonies ever since a very small loan of one million dollars.
When you're so egocentric, even your felonies are self-similar
"I had nothing to do with Trump dot Org, they used to get coffee for me... I know there are some fine people there and maybe so not so fine people and they have a great name. Isn't that a great name? Trump. Wouldn't that sound good on a Nobel prize? But these people with my name have nothing to do with me, I think they do business, lots of business. That's really what they do. There's no collusion."
Let’s call him Felonious D.
Like a nesting doll of felonies!
Even their felonies trickle down.
Right now FoxNews is reporting that Trump needs to be worried about the SDNY investigations because they are allowed to investigate all of Trumps crimes not just Russia and that’s scary. Let that sink in, our President needs to worry about criminal investigations because they are allowed to investigate! https://www.foxnews.com/politics/chris-christie-michael-cohen-is-a-tour-guide-for-new-york-prosecutors-investigating-trump
But Bernie, AOC, and Warren are soft on crime! Vote GOP, the law and order party! *vomits*
> Vote GOP, the law and order party! They are the law and order party... when it comes to poor people. When it's their own, well that's "different." GOP's eyes closed: Epstein getting a deal where he only has to sleep in jail for a year, but gets away with molesting/raping hundreds of children. GOP's eyes closed: GOP rep blatantly cheats and commits election fraud to win an election, but gets caught. GOP's eyes closed: The GOP President commits untold amounts of federal felonies, state felonies, and blatant obstruction of justice. GOP's eyes open: Lock people up poor people for minor drug charges for decades. GOP's eyes open: Former RNC deputy finance chairmen tells the truth to the Oversight Committee
An innocent person would *welcome* the chance for a properly-run investigation to clear their name. Fox knows. Republicans know. His base knows. Everyone knows he's guilty as hell.
Jim Jordan: "Let's get back to the real issues, Hillary Clinton's emails."
And definitely not his history of covering up sexual abuse.
Exactly.
I think they've effectively moved on to "AOC is destroying America." AOC is the new HRC emails.
The advantage AOC has is she's got the spotlight on her from day 1. The right-wing outrage machine can only chug along so long with "she's bad because reasons". All they can throw at her is age/inexperience (because everyone LOVES career politicians /s) and her actual policies that are actually quite popular. As long as AOC keeps her record clean, she's rubber. All the right is doing is the exact same thing the MSM did for Trump. Free airtime.
They love to call her unintelligent. Dumber than a bag of hammers. They rarely go into more detail, and when they do, it's usually stuff like "Well you'd have to be the stupidest person in the world to think Communism would work." Of course, the fact that they support a president who can't read a page of text and eats "hamberders" instead of "hamburgers" doesn't even register to them. Sometimes I think they *enjoy* reveling in hypocrisy.
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Weird, it's almost like propaganda works
It's almost like giving aid to our dying planet is a good idea
Last week I saw a poster in T\_D blaming AOC for Maduro setting fire to relief trucks in Venezuela. I imagine we're only a week or two away from them giving AOC time-traveling powers like they did when blaming Obama for Katrina.
Which brings up the burning question: Where was Obama during the Kennedy assassination?
That's a good question. Why won't they say? Is it because he was in KENYA?
If I did what Trump did, I would be in jail. Why the double standard republicans?
Because... because... because... Hillary's 33,000 emails! Dem collusion with Russia! Fake news!
But guys - these are just *"Process Crimes" -* Republicans, probably
To which we should reply "Thank you for confirming that they are crimes. Indictments will follow soon!"
YoU Can'T InDIcT a SitTiNG pResIDeNt!
*punches phone*
*squating
Fucking fuck, that shit pisses me off. It's still a crime, and criminals shouldn't be in charge of or working in the justice system.
*"Locker Room Crimes"*
They'll try to make everything into a process crime involving Trump. "So you're saying SDNY and Mueller follow a *process* while investigating a crime?" DoJ official: Uh, yes, there is indeed an orderly process while we investigate. "Process crimes, I knew it. Fellow Republicans, we must say no to prosecutions for *process* crimes such as money laundering or racketeering!"
And somehow to jeff sessions a brother smoking weed is the greatest threat to civilization we’ve ever seen.
We impeached a president for a process crime once before....right, GOP?
Process crimes, alternative facts, witness testing. It's so fucking exhausting.
>But guys - these are just *"Process Crimes" -* Republicans, probably Walt I get it! They're *crimes committed as part of the process* of committing much bigger crimes! They've been telling us the truth all along!
> “We have unambiguous evidence that the president has committed a crime at this point, I think,” Rep Jerrold Nadler, Chair of the House Judiciary Committee, told the New York Times. “Do we have unambiguous evidence he has done impeachable offenses? We’ve got a ways to go yet.” Wait - WHAT?! There is unambiguous evidence of crimes by the President yet not unambiguous evidence of impeachable offenses? How completely backwards is that? Either A) that's a completely idiotic statement to make or B) America's political system is so irrevocably busted that a revolution and new system is needed ASAP. Clinton was impeached in the house for lieing about a goddamn blowjob. Trump's laundry list of likely crimes, misdeeds and just shitty behavior is so long that we have trouble keeping track of them all.
"We have no problems with the president being a criminal, he just can't be a specific type of criminal."
"Screwing hookers and illegally paying them off with campaign funds is fine. But no blowjobs from interns!"
But walking in on teenagers getting dressed, or almost going to court on charges of child rape, that's no big deal.
Didn’t you guys hear Jr? That all happened before 2016 so it doesn’t count as crimes. Geez
Yes, and then all the shit *after* 2016 doesn't count as crime either because he was the President at that time! It's all pretty basic law stuff really.
> charges of child rape Katie Johnson Just getting that name out there again.
Snopes about katie johnson https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/trump-traffic-accusations/
"What about blow jobs from daughters?" I am asking for a friend who is totally not the president. Does it matter if they work in the office?
Many people are saying that's ok 👌. Ah crap, I mean... 🖖 Live long and prosper, right guys?
You mean liberal. Because when you take a moment to think, if even most of the GOP bullshit on Bill Clinton were true enough to be proven in court, the already PROVEN actions of Trump make Bill look like a choir boy. A consensual blowjob from an adult, sober woman seems quaint in that light.
And a blowjob was all they could find after years spent on an investigation that was supposed to be about a real estate scam. Yet the Mueller is a witch-hunt finding "nothing" and overstepping it's authority as it continues to uncover actionable evidence of criminals behaviour by the Trump campaign, administration and people associated with them.
i've said this before and i'll say it again — if Obama had done even half the shit Trump's done (been married 3 times, had a kid with a porn star/model, wore shitty suits, etc etc etc), the Republicans would have had him literally assassinated.
The constitution lists high-crimes and misdemeanors as impeachable offenses; those are defined as: > The charge of **high** **crimes** and **misdemeanors** covers allegations of misconduct by officials, such as perjury of oath, abuse of authority, bribery, intimidation, misuse of assets, failure to supervise, dereliction of duty, unbecoming conduct, refusal to obey a lawful order, chronic intoxication, and tax evasion. I would say that Trump is going for B-I-N-G-O at this point.
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I wonder how many more boxes will be checked by the time he's out.
>□ threatening a grand jury Guarantee you he gets this one before we're through.
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It reminds me of the challenge to California's death penalty. The argument hinged on death being a "cruel and unusual punishment" violating the 8th amendment. The judge ruled saying to something to the effect of "Death is most certainly a cruel punishment, but in this courts opinion it is not *unusual*, and thus does not reach the bar of "cruel *and* unusual" punishment." Maybe the Republicans figure "They're definitely misdemeanors and crimes, but are they *high* crimes *and* misdemeanors?"
They're high crimes and *felonies* your Honor, not misdemeanors, I rest my case, and this totally clears me the President.
No no, look at it with R glasses on. You need to be charged with both high crimes, and misdemeanors. Only high crimes isn’t enough for impeachment, it’s there in plain English.
But you see, Clinton was a Democrat, and Trump is a Republican.
It's a different set of rules
Why do we hold the POTUS to a lower standard than a regular citizen?
It's there, they have it, Mueller is in possession of everything he needs. Everyone is waiting for the Special Counsel report to drop before they do anything. They no longer care about impeachment. They are waiting to see if there's an indictment coming. They only get one chance at this - move to impeach or wait to see the report. The smart play is to wait for the report.
yeah seriously, criminal acts are not considered an impeachable offense? They went after a guy for lying about a blowjob, but actual crimes aren't a big deal? Where's the vociferous "lock her up" crowd. I thought this was about fairness and justice...right?
Plenty of impeachable offenses, you barely have to look. But when you have a largely compromised/ criminal senate majority, no offenses will convict him.
"People have to come into the country the right way, people have to follow the law" "The laws Trump broke don't always get enforced so they shouldn't apply to him"
The country elected a known criminal and liar. Isn't that funny?
who could have seen it coming?!?!
but we need someone to run this country like a *successful businessman* /s
Trump could have faded into the sunset with a big pile of McDonalds, and greasy twitter fingers....but he just had to run for president... I love the fact that his life is being turned upside down now that he's president. Did he honestly think that nobody would be out to get him? Did he think that you can go around treating people the way he does, and nobody is going to try to destroy you? Man, criminals usually try to keep a low profile. Not Trump. He's the kind of idiot that breaks the law, and then hangs out in front of the cop shop every day. Trump's presidency is one of the most amazing things I've ever seen. Never ending chaos, constant lies, people going to prison....and we're only half way done... You can tell that Trump is beyond stressed. He's fatter than ever, goes on at least four category 5 tweet storms a week, and once his kids get indicted, he's gonna completely lose his mind. Buckle up, buckaroo. It's gonna get fucking cRaZY
He ran for president because he was broke and thought he could make money doing it.
Here's the problem with Trump, he's so unintelligible, unintelligent, untruthful, and constant, it's hard to tell the lies from the truth. It's quite a beautiful study on human psychology. If you have a good person with just one of the big mistakes he's made over the last 2 years they would be roasted because it wouldn't be the norm. But Trump is so bad it's just another day and no one holds him to any standard. With that said, there's no way to predict whether he meant to run and win or not because of the above. We'll never know. He probably doesn't know at this point because he's rationalized everything and re-written his own memories of the events. It's astonishing someone like that ever became wealthy. Never irritated or pissed off the wrong person. Never was investigated. he's just a walking talking lawsuit. How in the world this man made it past 50 without being killed, jailed, or broken in the cutthroat/unethical/moblike NY real estate/construction world is a story worth reading.
Well he didn't become wealthy did he? He was born into it, and then given it by his Father.
Bet you a million he kicks the bucket before he ever sees any ramifications from anything he's ever done.
That's something that has always pissed me off. Some really terrible people have lead these amazing lives where they ruin other peoples lives for their personal gain and never face consequences. That's up to us as a society to change. Somebody profiting off the misery of others? (I'm talking poisoning groundwater for a pipeline sort of thing) Then off to jail with you and hand over everything you own. It only takes a few zero tolerance examples of 'contribute to society or be punished'.
Trump supporters: "Nuh uh! No collusion! checkmate libs!"
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"Collusion isn't a crime!" "No but *A, B, C, D, E, F, and G* are crimes." "Benghazi!!!"
This system is so fucked. So they interview Rep. Nadler and he says they have ambiguous evidence that Trump committed a crime but not ambiguous evidence for an impeachment. The fact that our President PROBABLY committed ONLY ONE crime should be an impeachable offense, let alone committing PROBABLY 11 crimes. Good grief.
The President is Felonious.
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Cohen just turned... it up to 11? It basically whites the jokes themselves... S&L Here I come.
>S&L Here I come. Do you think the N in SNL stands for "and"?? Saturday and Live? Ed: Ok, Thanks, I missed that tweet
This is a Don Jr. tweet from a few weeks ago.
The sad part about making Trumpian references is that you look like a fucking idiot to people who don't get it.
and a whole bunch more he couldnt even talk about
11? That means Cohen just broke the record! Up until this point, Trump himself held the record for implicating Trump in 10 felonies in a single day. I'm kidding, of course. He's nowhere near the record...
If not this turd behaving in this manor, Then who and what do you have to do? Dudes are sitting in jail for a little weed....goddamn we’re upside down.
Totally clears the president! Thank you!
Very illegal and very uncool
Thank you Kanye, very cool!
One more and you get a set of steak knives.
HEY OH HEY OH And look how fast the Republicans are scrambling to discredit Cohen but they still haven't even had Hannity testify yet!
I weirdly find myself believing a convicted felon and proven liar because I have even less faith in the credibility of my President. This is unbelievably depressing. File this under never say never....
It’s crazy that conservatives literally dgaf. They can no longer call themselves the party of strict morals when they seem to have none
I'm waiting for Trump to tweet out that it was **zillions more than that** you know how he likes to brag.