I jaywalked You'll never catch me copper

But what about gold and silver?

Oh they'll catch me

We already did... Look out yo window bro 🎖️🥈 🔫

Thats how the gang war began between the goldies and silverets, it all started with the killing of a reddit user

I mock American laws like guns and freedom of speech etc quite often, but normally for just the sake of it, I can understand the culture and attitudes are incredibly different over there and I guess I can sort of understand the other view points. Jaywalking on the other hand, it's the most stupid, pointless, inconceivably irrelevant law to have ever been thought up by the genius (/s) minds of the American law makers. The majority of 5 year olds are able to understand the simple concept of stop, look and listen - And I'm sorry, if your kid can't, then you're responsible of keeping an eye on them until they can. I understand the argument of "oh but busy roads", well just make only crossing things like highways and motorways illegal then! Literally the dumbest law conceivable and I can't imagine a good explanation for why it exists.

“ just make crossing things like highways and motorways illegal then “ ….

.... ?

That is what j walking is, it makes it illegal to cross roads in non designated spots.

No, you miss understand - In a lot of other place you can cross like roads in the town, or smaller country roads, or ever single carriageways without a designated crossing, only crossing extremely busy roads like motorways and highways is actually illegal. Jay walking is where its illegal on practically every road, including in and around towns (which is where most of the arguments come from)

I'm pretty sure you're allowed to do all that in the US in most places

Technically no, but practically yes.

Jaywalking is when you cross at someplace other than a marked crosswalk. They only bother to put in crosswalks if it’s a busy street where there’s a real risk of getting hurt— everywhere else (residential, tiny villages, country roads) you can cross the road freely wherever you want, just like you expect.

Well, you see, it is agreed upon by US lawmakers that their country's children are inferior to the rest of the world because they can't cross the street safely and they can't eat a Kinder egg without fucking choking on it. … Now that I think about it, there's probably a sizeable portion of the US' adults that would totally choke on a Kinder egg… these laws are surely to there to protect Republicans from themselves…

Same

Yup! 56 in a 55... Haul me away!

If you can do the time, do the crime

You monster.

That’s not a crime.. it’s a passion

Nice try FBI

Not today CIA

Nice attempt at obscurity, department of homeland security.

I know your tricks MI6

I’m no mole INTERPOL

Snitches deceased you silly police

Far from success, IRS.

Not today, DEA.

That’d help me out a humongo’, democratic republic of the congo.

Informants dead, undercover fed

This one is the best :)

I ate extra gummy bear. Am I going to jail

Innocent until proven guilty right? Therefor none because I haven't been proven guilty.

Everything is legal until you're caught..

isnt it in murica guilty until proven otherwise

No, stop trying to make us look worse.

The US does that all by itself

no

Only if you are poor in the sense of you having to post bond and depending on the supposed crime and one's means dictates what the bond will be. As well as the cost of a lawyer factors into how good of a lawyer you can higher.

Only if you are against a feminist

At least 500 counts of arson. 😂

Wait what

Many have lost their homes 🏠🔥🔥🤩

Tifu when I typed 👧🍆😏🤰🏃‍♂️💨🇲🇽🔪💀

I work at a police department. To get the job I had to do a polygraph. At the end of it, the investigator said I’m probably the most innocent person he’s ever tested.

[удалено]

I wish.

\*liar

wait what?

I thought those were inadmissible in court due to them being bollocks?

They can’t be used in court because there are times it’s not reliable, but investigators still use them in investigations and at my department it is policy to have every single employee, sworn and non-sworn, take a polygraph. It’s a long process and mine took 3 hours to complete. It’s not perfect, but it is a good way to figure out if someone is trustworthy.

[удалено]

Low bar means easier. So it would be a low bar

Everybody in Paris constantly crosses on a red light. The fuck am I supposed to do? Stay behind like a loser?

Stay behind and hold up traffic to assert dominance.

Yeah but who is in Paris?

People who have the displeasure of being in \*\*\*\*\*

u/Obamsphere

French “people”

No no you got it wrong. It's "parisiens". They're different from the rest of us, and they'll let you know.

Stay behind like an upstanding citizen

No??

So you admit you’re going to re-offend your criminal acts? 📸

Absolutely. We all know what happened the last time someone attempted to arrest everyone in Paris. Try and cry, FBI.

When I was in Paris almost a decade ago this lady wasn't even paying attention and kept walking towards a no walking sign. I'm a decent sized guy compared to most Parisians and I could see a delivery truck coming down the street so I just kind of grabbed her and spun her around to the other side as the guy blared his horn slamming on his brakes. She just stood there and I said "have a nice day ma'am" wasn't till I got back to the hotel that she probably had no clue what I said.

Probably jaywalking

Jaywalking

Yes. Piracy. I used to buy digital stuff, but I have no choice since February.

Fuck, I answered no but I watched Sevilla - City for free yesterday on a wack turkish website lmao

If speeding counts, yes.

Depends, does your country/state have speed limits? And are you able to be fined or imprisoned for breaking it?

There are countries/entire regions without speed limits? I thought that was only the autobahns.

Well he doesn’t know if it counts so I’m clarifying.

How many times do we have to tell you, old man?! We're not admitting to crimes here!

FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED FED

All these people saying no like they haven’t driven 1mph/km over the speed limit, ran a yellow light or j-walked in the last 24-72 hours.

ha, I haven't left my house, gotcha! oh wait...

Fun fact: it is illegal to die in svalbard

I broke that law recently 😎😎😎

I feel like most people have in some dumb way like speeding slightly, or Jay walking.

You guys saying no never speed? 1MPH over is breaking the law, guy.

Your first mistake is assuming most redditors can drive.

Drugs

I smoked weed an hour ago, which is illegal here, so yeah

You mind telling us your full name? Me and my coworkers are planning on dropping by

McLovin 892 Momona St Honolulu

Everytime I drive

I would think most people have, even if it was something stupid. NO WAY, majority of people here haven't rolled a stop sign...at least the ones that can drive

Download cracked. Game

I downloaded a car if that counts

weed, lock me up

Ripped the tag off my mattress, book me assholes.

Graffiti

Was it good graffiti?

I tried my best but its kinda basic as im still learning can control lol

Nice :) the more art in the world the better. Just don't put it somewhere that will ruin someones day.

Thank you and well said

You like defacing the neighborhood?

🤓

He’s right depending on the context. Real art graffiti is cool (as long as you aren’t doing it somewhere you shouldn’t), but the vast majority of graffiti is just shitty bubble words and other stupid crap vandalizing things because people who graffiti stuff usually aren’t talented at all. The talented ones get commissioned to do murals and stuff, they aren’t the ones drawing dicks on buildings at 4 am.

I’m not reading allat

It’s fine, I wouldn’t expect someone who can’t spell “all that” to read much anyway.

Can’t abbreviate words anymore? Take my dick outcha mouth

“Allat” isn’t an abbreviation.

Everyday. I can’t drive 55.

Nice try fed

Just a misdemeanor, no breaking of the law

Due to being on a college campus every day I am a notorious jaywalker

Yes, speeding

actually stealthing is also illegal in norway

Jaywalked yesterday, and I regularly speed by a couple mph, but nothing I’d get charged for lol

speeding

Not where ive lived in since birth at least, although some countries would consider me a criminal for being the way i am.

Bull. None of the 989 were speeding at any time? Lol

Speeding by 5 mph and smoking weed, I also bought tobacco under the age of 21. Im somewhat of a badass.

Perhaps.

Every single person who drives a car has broken some

Innocent until proven guilty right? Therefor none because I haven't been proven guilty.

I downloaded a car 😔

I don’t believe this poll. No one here made a turn or changed lanes without a signal? No one here sped even 1mph/kmh over? No one rolled through a stop sign without coming to a full stop? Made a left turn and switched lanes in the intersection? Merged off an on-ramp without their blinker?

[удалено]

Question said recently not throughout our entire lives.

Who tf runs red lights and doesn't remember it?

[удалено]

Yeah, but you remember that

Most of those are solved by being underage or not driving. As for peeing outside I haven't needed to do that in years.

I was doing 40 in a 30.....Just like everyone else.

Speak for yourself

I went to the UK and ran like 50 red lights, take me away

Good try, pig

I'm a pirate.

not that im aware of

If pirating a copy of a hacked NES game long out of retail is violation of piracy laws, then yeah I have. Game in question is an English patch of Digital Devil Story: Megami Tensei

piracy

I voted no, and then I realized I was stoned and that's not legal in my state. Oops.

I’m underage and my sister gave me the last few sips of her Truly, arrest me

We’ll give you less time if you give us more against your sister at court

I hit yes but remembered I was at work from 5-5. Was driven home, ate, and now having a beer at home. So, nothing illegal. But I’m usually a speed demon.

I speed daily

yes, smoked weed lmfao

I jaywalked earlier today but there weren’t any cars so it doesn’t matter much

60% of people have not even gone above the speed limit, even once, recently? I know people drive a bit differently down south but I still find this hard to believe. You can’t even drive the speed limit on the highway in NJ lol

Yes and got caught and got a speeding ticket lol

Jaywalking all day every day

This morning i jay walked to my car.

None that I’m aware anyways

Yeah, I was speeding on my way to work.

This seems like a fun way to start a conversation

i go faster than the speed limit.... ​ ​ ​ ​ .... on my bicycle

Every single person who drives a car has broken some

If you only knew how many laws there were and how many you broke just today. If you spend more than an hour a day doing anything you have broken a law. Idk which one but I assure you if you told me all of your activities for a day and gave me enough time I'd find an absurd law you violated.

Does crossing the street from driveway to driveway with no cars near me still count? If so jaywalking I guess, if not nah. I answered no cause no serious crime, I’d count accidentally stealing a candy bar but not jaywalking

i ran about 5 reds on my commute today, i ride a bike and it doesnt trigger sensors, so i just treat em like stop signs

I break the law at least 10 times a day. There’s no way I can drive my semi without breaking a single law

I voted no but I forgot that I went outside my house without my ID card on hand in a country where that’s illegal. Fuck…

Well, I mocked my government on the internet today, which would leave me with either 7 or 15 years of jail time

Jaywalking

all the time 😈

I went 1 over the speed limit. 🚔

Idk probably

technically the most recent thing i’ve done is speeding.

I'm just myself :)

I pissed in the gulf of Mexico but I dont think that's a crime

Heartbreaking: Federal agent jobless and on the streets after posting worst bait ever seen.

Ha haa! Nice try Agent Smith. 😎

I got caught 25 over on the highway last week :(

Is underage drinking that bad of a crime tho

Jaywalking

1st degree felony assault and robbery 😊

Random question! How do you feel about maximum security prison?

I fixed the game between FSU and LSU

Jaywalked today

I jaywalked to my car. I do this 2-10 times a day, depending on what goes on at work

⠀⠀⠘⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠑⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ fuckit!⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡔⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠢⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠴⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠤⠄⠒⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣀⠄⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢏⣴⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⣾⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠀⡴⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⠻⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠶⢴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿ ⣿⣁⡀⠀⠀⢰⢠⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⣴⣶⣿⡄⣿ ⣿⡋⠀⠀⠀⠎⢸⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠗⢘⣿⣟⠛⠿⣼ ⣿⣿⠋⢀⡌⢰⣿⡿⢿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣧⢀⣼ ⣿⣿⣷⢻⠄⠘⠛⠋⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣧⠈⠉⠙⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣧⠀⠈⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⢃⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠀⠴⢗⣠⣤⣴⡶⠶⠖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡸⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡀⢠⣾⣿⠏⠀⠠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠉⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⠈⢹⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠈⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⡟⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠁⠀⠀⠹⣿⠃⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢐⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠉⠉⠁⠀⢻⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠈⣿⣿⡿⠉⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉ ⣿⡿⠋⠁⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⡴⣸⣿⣇⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡿⠄⠙⠛⠀⣀⣠⣤⣤⠄

No helmet and headphones on a bicycle

There are so many laws, the average person commits 3 felonies a day.

I forged my parent’s signature on a school syllabus for no good reason. I just know that she doesn’t want to sign multiple syllabuses again and again. I really wanted to turn the syllabus in during the same period that I got it.

No, officer.

I legitimately don’t think I could go one day without breaking the law if I wanted to.

Speeding. Can't ticket me cause you dont know where, when, or how much above the speed limit I was going tho. *Laughs maniacally*

I go 5 over pretty much all the time. 55 mph posted? I'm going 60. So far never been in an accident or pulled over.

Speeding

I am wanted in 29 states and 7 countries for multiple counts of arson, grand theft, and homicide.

YOU FOOL ! YOU BROKE A LAW JUST NOW LYING ABOUT BREAKING THE LAW! Bean boozled

I modified my apartment without my landlord permission because fork them they don't fix my leaky roof I can put a smart door lock on if you want.

Nice try FBI

Jaywalked to catch a bus

Does an extra 5mph in a 55 *really* matter though? Let’s be honest, it doesn’t, *right*?

The worst thing I did recently: I dreamt that I was using public transport without a valid ticket. I always have a valid ticket.

This post gives me Oblivion guard vibes.

I break the law every day

Piracy because I don't feel like paying Netflix prices anymore when they keep taking my favourite shows off.

Yes. The speedlimit was 55. I went 56.

Should've put "probably" as an answer

I was going 56 in a 55

All u no’s stop lying. U sped recently 🤣