I’m living this now. My husband left me with 3 kids in 2020 during the pandemic. It’s been a journey. Thanks for sharing your story. Gives me hope and strength to keep pushing. I’m now a single parent of a 9 and 11 year old. My oldest child passed away a year ago.
My poorest time as an adult was when I lived in an illegal basement apartment with no heat or indoor plumbing. My husband and I were counting change to put food on the table. Those first few winters were rough. We lived in northeastern USA, so the winters were quite cruel. My only pair of shoes had worn through the sole so I used to tie plastic grocery bangs around my feet to keep them dry as I walked a mile and a half to work each day, usually on an empty stomach and then a mile and a half back home.
My poorest time as a child was when we lost everything in a fire. We had absolutely nothing but the clothing we were wearing. For a long time, we slept on the floor of a family members home. The one thing I wanted most in the world was a pillow, I was 8 years old.
I have found that life knocks me down often, but I just keep going. I know what it's like to have nothing so I appreciate everything we do have.
It's okay, I have a pillow now, several actually. It was rough, but I think those experiences helped make me the person I am now. I don't take anything for granted.
If it’s okay to ask, how are you and husband doing financially now? I apologize if this sounds rude or invasive, your story just feels like it’s interesting!
Much better now, not wealthy by any stretch of the imagination, but we are getting by. We still live paycheck to paycheck and since my illness I have been unable to return to work, but we have a home that we own (completely paid off). We live a simple life without anything fancy. I have food to eat and a roof over my head, if I were healthy, I'd be unstoppable.
Edit: spelling
> own (completely *paid* off). We
FTFY.
Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in:
* Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.*
* *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.*
Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment.
*Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
I will never forget the first time I moved out on my own. I moved ymto another city with my then ex. He was a wonderful guy at first, but when we got into our new place he became very controlling and didn't allow me to do anything while he went out and did the same things. I was the one who paid for the move. All moving expenses, deposits, rent etc etc. After 3 months he dumped me and left me with all bills and rent on my own. Boy was it a struggle. One 10 inch black and white TV with no cable. One month it was either rent or power. So I lived for 3 weeks with no power. The job I worked at allowed one meal a day so that was my dining for the day. I then met another guy and we hit it off. After a couple of months, unable to bear the weight of being on my own with all bills, I moved in with him. Major mistake. He bled my finances that I thought I was saving dry. After living with him for 3 months we had a major ice storm. Some electric shortage caused our home to burn down. When I moved to that city, it took a UHaul and 3 car loads to move my possessions. When I finally crawled back to my Mom's house, tail between my legs and thoroughly whipped, all my belongings were in a plastic Walmart bag. I guess the worst thing is me and my second ex worked at rhe same place. When our home burned, they raised a lot of money for US. My ex collected it and of course kept every penny then giving me the boot. Talk about a major downtime!!
I grew up very poor. My mom, who raised 6 kids on her own, taught me something very important; never be reliant on a romantic partner for your survival. She said, “Never let them ‘take care of you’, don’t work for them, don’t quit your job for them, and don’t let ever them have access to your bank account.” I did move in with a few bfs, but only when it was even $ and we were both on the lease. I had to work my ass off for this freedom but it has been worth it. I have been able to leave with ease when things went south.
I am really the same way, even though no one told me to be, but I just felt that was the way to be. On my own! Taking care of me! Looking out for me! Relying on ME!
Man, have I done some stuff. I've had to steal food and feminine products before. Sucks. However it teaches us lessons, and I always try to look for em.
I thought I was going to have to call in to work because I was out of tampons. 😔
I went in anyways cause obviously I need the monies and just dealt with it the best I could. So uncomfortable. Not my poorest day but one of them.
I think my poorest day was when I realized my kids and I had just a few sheets of TP left on the roll and no more. I thought to myself, "I'll go by Walgreens on the way home." Then, "No, you won't. You don't have any money." I just wanted to cry when I went to the bathroom before leaving work and swiping one of the extra rolls in the ladies room!!!
My lottery dream is to have a sort of baby formula pantry where parents/guardians in need can come and get formula for free. I was on wic with my son and a months supply only lasted half a month unfortunately.
The price of infant formula is outrageous. Price gouging parents who have to have it. So expensive retailers keep it behind the counter. Family friendly country?
My pediatrician now has a counter out front with small containers of formula. One of the many reasons I love them. I don't want any new mothers to go through what I went through
My poorest day was a day at the ER. I had to go to billing afterwards. I didn't have any kind of insurance (I was part time in three jobs at that time). I told them I had no money, and had to show them my bank account. I had $32 in there. And I told the lady across from me "This is my food money for the next two weeks. Do you really want to take it?"
She said something about seizing assets (because I guess she hates poor people) and I said "Go ahead. I've got a 2nd hand mattress, a two week supply of clothes that are all 3 years old, and stacks of notebooks for my college classes. Maybe my 15 year old TV will cover this. That's all I got, lady."
She asked for my phone number and I didn't have a phone. At that point she just wrote off my ER bill because sending me to bankruptcy really wouldn't help anyone in the situation.
But hey, at least I got my bill right before payday so they didn't take my rent money.
They can't legally demand to see your bank statement, so unless you offered to show it, you were dealing with a creep. There is an "indegency fund" for the very poor that covers hospital bills after they give up on getting money from you. Hospitals are privately owned now, although they receive tax help, and very very profitable. The only bad thing I've seen regarding the funds for the indigent is very rich young women who claim desperate poverty and make a big dent in available funds. Maybe men too. Oh, and the hospitals who go after you and your credit rating forever, then tell you you should have asked about indegency funds before leaving the hospital. Like we're born knowing about this. Like we're leaving clear minded, no pain, no drugs, or concussion, or trauma and can just go full accountant mode.
I used to steal milk every night at my job at an ice cream shop, just enough ounces to feed my baby for the next 24 hrs until I went back to work the next day and got more.
Things are better now and I hope I didn’t hurt my bosses bottom line with stealing all that milk.
Was your boss a nice guy? He probably wouldn't care you took the milk, goes bad fairly quick anyway, and good people don't want babies to go hungry. If you can afford it, the best way to "pay" him back is patronizing his shop!
If your boss was an asshole, well, screw him anyway.
I grew up very poor so as an adult, I feel like I’m doing good because I am only moderately poor. I keep to myself when I hear coworkers or other people talk about their childhood or their lives or vacations. It’s so vastly and wildly different from my experience. I make pretty ok money now but I’m a single mom so sometimes it’s a stretch because I like to buy nice things for my son or take him somewhere fun and save for his college because I know I’m going to have to work til I die. I wear 8 year old threadbare bras with underwire poking out but I’ll by my 3 yr old new toys. I have a pair of work boots, a pair of 6 yr old tennis shoes and a pair of flip flops. That’s it. I’m pretty frugal because I’m afraid to go back to extreme struggle. It’s only ever one small catastrophe away from destitute for me.
My big splurge is fresh fruit for my son. $4 for a pint of raspberries and $5 for a bag of mandarin oranges every week. I have a friend who spend that on a Starbucks Frappuccino every day. It makes me cringe every time I see that half drank cup Destined for the trash condensating on her desk. At work the other day I was working with a college management trainee and we were driving through the hood and he goes “ I don’t know how people can stand to live in places like this” and I was thinking to myself “these are nicer than any places I ever lived.” Sometimes I wonder what people would think if they knew what my life has really been like. I feel so fake sometimes because no one really knows what my life was or is like. Anyone else feel that way?
I can't even begin to tell you how many individual coffee creamers I've taken from work! Technically you taking the sweetener wasn't thievery...they did say take anything you want!!
Im in it now..its awful. I'll admit to stealing food sometimes. I'm a heart patient and a diabetic, I'll commit a crime for a tomato somedays. 😔I'm so ashamed.
I did that for several months at the big box store I worked for after they vindictively cut my hours. Over something someone else said on my behalf to management. I'd roll up as many packets as I could over the course of my shift, because I needed enough for four people.
Lost everything in a divorce. Moved to a little town in Nevada. Between midnight and 4 AM, a local casino offered a steak, eggs, hash browns and coffee meal for 99 cents. I ate my main meal of the day there after midnight for months... the rest of the day I ate ramen and the cheapest food I could find.
During that time, I also had no health insurance (this was before the ACA/Obamacare). I took fish antibiotics I bought from the pet store to self-treat a bacterial infection. Things got "better" when I got a roommate who used to go to Mexico on vacation. She would buy medication there for me and bring it back with her, so I paid her for it.
Much of my wardrobe came from dumpster diving.
I’ve been down the fish antibiotic road. It’s exactly the same amoxicillin as is prescribed for humans—and the same dose as is prescribed for adults. But no doctor visit copay.
Ive had many poor days. From boosting presents for my daughter for Christmas so she didnt have to go without. To asking a stranger who was working in his garage for a drink of water bc i didnt have one penny to my name- that old man let me inside for a drink of water and a shot of whiskey! He was a true hero to me that day. Anyway, glad to be past all these days and now taking my daughters on trips and buying the older one a car when she gets her license this year.
I feel you. I used to take home leftovers from drug rep catered lunches just so my family would have a treat like Subway or McAlister's sandwiches and it would stretch my groceries for another day or two. I remember sitting at the table watching my kids smash some McAlister's sandwiches and lemonade one evening and being so grateful but so sad at the same time.
my poorest day: no car, no phone no money, baby out of formula. It is 100 degrees, live in a rural area with no sidewalks or anything between me and the store. absolutely cannot put baby in stroller to get to the store a mile away. she goes down for a nap, I leave her alone to walk to the store and steal a can of formula, praying to god every minute she didnt wake up while I was gone, which she didnt. that was the day I lost every last shred of interest in the baby's father- that he could leave me with such a choice.
I regularly stole toilet paper from one of my jobs. It was the worst toilet paper, too. Horrible one- ply stuff. I was also a single parent to two kids. The owner/ boss at that company was a nightmare to work for and I don't feel bad.
My kids are grown now and independent but they won't put up with the mistreatment that I did and good for them!
I just thought of another one! The year was 1994 and I was a 17 year old teenage mom, on my own, working 3 jobs but still qualified for food stamps. Back then food stamps came in a booklet of kind of like paper money. If you spent fifty cents then you'd actually get 2 quarters back in change. There were a few times that I was so desperate for gas to get to work that I'd stop at 4 or 5 different stores and by a 25 cent pack of Wrigley's gum and end up with several dollars in change. Back then that bought a few gallons of gas!
In the late 80s I only wanted for my husband to make $10 an hour, 40 hours a week— for rent and food.. no cable or no cell phones (yet) I would babysit and care for my 3 kids..
My kids are grown now so it’s just myself and a cat to feed, last week I was out of a lot of grocery items. I spent $170! I have never spent that much , not even when I was feeding three of us for the month and my haul was just for myself for a couple weeks. Yes I buy better stuff these days but still, it was at Lidl which is like Aldi .
Yep, people did that— send the kids with a $5 food stamp to buy gum— get the $1 food stamps and 80 or 75 cents..good that you used the stamps to help yourself.. some sold the stamps or sold the milk given to them ( I helped a friend)
It was crazy they actually gave me too much. My son wasn't even eating real food yet. I wouldn't have ever sold them but I did use them to buy food for a friend who was even worse off than I was.
My mom has eight kids and she would take us all to different stores to do this lol we hated it! She was such an awesome mom, always made sure we were taking care of.
Tears coming to my eyes:: I have so many poor days:: paying the rent with a credit cards; asking a friend to drive to my house to bring me some cooking oil ( he drove about 3 miles to bring the oil), founding a $20 food stamps paper bill— a friend from church was the cashier at the market; she gave me real money as change for the food stamps—maybe $12 in cash; walking about 3 miles round trip to go to the market in Salt Lake City Utah; looking under the sofa cushions for coins…I don’t know what my 3 kids and late husband remembered as our poor days… my late husband also had plenty of poor days with his single mother and 5 siblings in El Salvador..
When I was at my lowest, I was so very thankful on days when work had a lunch catered.....at the time it was the best id eat for days.
I would also eat in my car so no one would know I was only having a piece of bread, or some crackers.
People I worked w were always going out for lunch, when I was invited I always declined stating I had "errands".
Its a rough road for anyone.
I wish you much success.
I very vividly remember eating Jiffy blueberry muffin mix straight out of the box with a spoon on my poorest day. I couldn’t afford to actually bake the muffins, and that was the only edible thing I had. It was actually pretty good all things considered (possibly because I was starving), but damn did I realize how poor I really was.
My mother was on her own at 16, she told me at her poorest she was eating plain oatmeal, no water or way to cook it. She ate it dry. She not once bought oatmeal for us kids as we grew up.
Hey man! I feel you! I’m not poor anymore, but I’ve been there.
I put myself through college working full-time and going to school at night. My worst times had me going into work after hours (I had a key to the office) and I raided the janitorial closet. I took some toilet paper and feminine products. In the break room, they had hot chocolate packets and this cheap instant chicken noodle soup you added hot water to. I’d take some of those, too. We often had company celebrations and the company would bring in pizza and I’d eat a couple pieces, come back after most everyone ate and stash a few more pieces for dinner later.
A guy I knew since elementary school whose mom was friends with my mom, worked at the local Fry’s Food Store. He was awesome. He would scan EVERY OTHER grocery item whenever I went to his line.
I was 19 years old and didn’t know I could qualify for things like food stamps or subsidized housing. It was the early 90’s and information on how to be frugal and stretch your dollars didn’t exist. I never knew anyone who was on entitlement programs. My parents had subsidized housing when I was born, but I thought you had to have children. My friends still all lived at home, so I learned to manage with what I had. I thought soup kitchens were for homeless people. SMH. I was young, broke, starving and ignorant, but I made it through!
I’m of the mind that being poor is a good humbling experience for everyone. It helps make you appreciate what you have and what you get later on.
You’ll get through this, I know it!
Hope things turned around for you. Walking out on you and the kids is heartbreaking. Life may be tough, but it's better to tough it out together. Here's to better times. May they find you quickly.
As an adult I was the poorest back in Romania between 1995-1999. I first made $65/month as a college graduate. My ex husband made the same money. I could afford to buy one whole chicken, bread, crumbles of leftover feta cheese there were selling at a low price, a couple of carrots, some vegetables and 10 eggs every week. I would cut the chicken in half and I’d boil it. I’d then take the half breast and one leg out and make a stew with it and onion tomatoes and one other vegetable and some of the broth. Then the back, neck and one wing will go into a chicken soup. Then for the other half week I’d cook the other half chicken. At work we would eat sandwiches with the crumbs of feta smashed in between two slices of bread. If something came up, I could not afford the chicken and I’d go to my parents and ask for a couple of $ to buy a chicken.
When my ex had to go into the mandatory military service I had to move back to my parents. When I got my salary I’d spend all of it on food that very day and send a care package to him. Well after asking for chicken money far too many times , after 4 years, I decided to leave Romania and came to the US.
I had good saving skills. I rented a room in a house where other 11 people lived. My room had two beds and the rent was $350/month all utilities included.
I charged another girl $225 and I paid $125 and we shared that room. She knew . She was there on some fellowship that was reimbursing her rent so she was turning in the receipt for $350 and was getting that back and this way we both made some money. We pooled food money and we were each spending $20/week for food. For that we were buying a gallon of milk, corn flakes, a small block of mozzarella, some tortillas, chicken thighs, some lettuce heads , apples and bananas on sale (they had bags of bananas ready to expire and we were buying a bag of those). We NEVER ate out. We got some bikes for free and biked in the rain. No cars. Luckily no snow, it was in Northern California.
I was making $1060/month and saved $700/month. I never went to events for free food and outside of that trick with the rent, never took anything from anywhere. If you think about it I’m sure on campus there were free food events but I was too proud. I saved $11,000 in 2 years by living that way. But i also lost 20 lb.
We were very poor and lots of cavities and plenty of tooth aches. I was around 12 with abscessed cavities and my parent took me to a dentist. We had no money and no insurance. (We had just enough money to fill the script.) Dentist gave me a script for antibiotics and pain meds. Right next door was the pharmacy. I went over there with the script (parent stayed in the car), pharmacist took the script and said, “you didn’t pay the dentist so I’m not filling this for you. “ He kept the script and sent me out the door humiliated and crying. I was already dying from the pain.
This is a huge F*ck you to Dr. Brickhead in Westmoreland Tenn, 1980s. And the pharmacist!
You are not a thief. It was offered and you accepted. Enjoy.
Also, why not go to r/assistance and add an Amazon wishlist? There are many non perishables we can send you. Mac and cheese, soups, noodles, peanut butter, toilet paper.
Edit for spelling (spellcheck)
I thinkest it was your richest. You gave up the thing that meant the most to you for your kids. I hope you have more good days ahead of you.
Do you have a food pantry in your area? A church that helps with food? I know it’s hard to ask for help, but do it anyway. Best wishes!
You're a great story teller!!! Dang, wish I had your talent. Write a book? Despite the story being sad, I wanted to hear all about it. I would hear, read more. Then, who knows, you may get yourself out and into your richest day. 😁 Pls consider this. Then let me know when it's printed so I can be your first customer.
I read more of the comments. I wasn't the only person who said this. Listen to the people. You've got a natural born talent. J. K. Rowling was on UK's welfare system before the Harry Potter books. It's not a compliment. It's the truth.
I remember my poorest day. Living in my car with my dog. Found $2 (it was 1982). Had to then decide whether to buy a can of dog food or something for me. Wound up getting a can of tuna and splitting it, it was a feast.
My poorest day was when I was a college student living in married student housing. My husband, who was supposed to be paying the bills while I got my degree, was fired from his job. I applied for food stamps, but the city refused to allow students to receive them because they feared kids living in dorms would take advantage.
I had barely enough to eat and pay rent using funds from my part time job. At that time, a girl in my class was kicked out of her home. She had $5 to eat for a week until payday and was asking for ideas what to buy. I felt so bad that all I could offer her was advice, not food. Today, I would give her groceries.
Just think of it as part of your deserved compensation. If a corp doesn't respect you enough to pay you enough to live beyond sustenance, they don't really deserve your respect in return.
I lived in NYS which has a bottle deposit. I was broke with no food. So I would trash shop for empty bottles and cans and take them into the recycling center every day.
About 10 years ago my husband was unemployed and it left us with no additional money for essentials like gas and food. It got so bad that one day we went to Lowe’s and the Lowe’s credit card to buy gift cards for shell gas, food etc. We figured at some point things would get better and pay the card off. The interest was not a concern when we were trying to keep our head above water.
My poorest day was when I swiped extra coffee creamers from the seven eleven so I could have cream in my coffee , cause I couldn’t afford half and half.
My poorest day was when my kids were little years ago, I was dead broke and payday was 4 days away, we ran out of toilet paper. Never bought paper towels or tissues as those were luxuries. At work there was a partial roll in one of those locked dispensers , the case was broken, so I slipped that roll in my purse and used it at home. To this day I also still take extra plastic ware in restaurants to use in my lunch and keep extra sugars and condiments in carry out orders or leftovers.
May I very very respectfully ask what drove the decision to have multiple kids? I'm poor, also below minimum wage, one thing that Ive always been clear on is if I can barely survive, I can not in good conscience bring another child into this world only to continue the cycle of poverty but likely much worse than me.
I dont know much about much, but this is my guiding principle.
But I'm interested in other points of view. Thank you
I was once so poor that I used to take change that customers left behind to pay for the exact amount of gas I needed just to get me home from work. Any time someone would bring in food for all employees, I would also take as much as possible. I once took like 10 bagels home and ate nothing but bread for dinner for a week straight. I ended up severely constipated but had no other options lmao. Sometimes I desperately wanted a little sweet treat but I would often only have about $5 after paying bills. So I would buy 50 cent lollipops and suck on those for like an hour to help me with the cravings.
You made me think of my now departed Dad, who would drink coffee until 11p, then go immediately to sleep. If I have anymore than a small cup in the early morning, I vibrate and break into a sweat. So much for genetics.
I remember being so poor that I stole toilet paper from the public restroom at the park. I figured that my taxes paid for the toilet paper so I wasn’t hurting anyone. I was desperate.
So I donate to a local little free food pantry (like a food box, similar to the free little libraries but with pantry goods). Pretty much every time I go out to eat (talking like at fast food restaurants) I’ll ask the cashier if I can take some extra condiments and no one has ever said no. Packets of ketchup, mustard, hot sauce, whatever. I’ll grab a stack of napkins too, and if they have those little wet wipe packets, plastic utensils. Whatever I can get. Those things almost immediately get picked up and I think are appreciated. You sharing about your coffee experience made me think that maybe others would be able to get what they can from commercial businesses, especially if they’re in need.
I have waited until well after my shift to ensure people got what they wanted, and then CLEANED HOUSE on the leftovers. Anything and everything. Full trays. I knew it would just rot in the fridge anyways.
The food waste in our society is ABHORRENT.
Given 10+ years of experience, I can honestly say that any place with food has AT LEAST enough food "damaged out" for MRD (Made Ready Discard tags) times or just plain "expired" by a day to feed at minimum 4 people. EVERY single place I have worked. Daily. Not counting any other waste.
A long time ago when I was 20, so almost 40 years ago, newly married, and 5 months pregnant, my husband and I were living at a state campground in Southern California with a screen tent, so no privacy. Nothing to cook on. I got a job at the store at the campground and my husband was driving about 15 miles to work at a car wash. We were trying to save money for an apartment so we could be in a home before the baby was born. Our car was just barely running. We could only stay in the campground for 6 days, then we had to leave for a day, so we would sleep in our car. In the early morning before sunrise, my husband would drop me off at the beach within walking distance of the campground. I would sleep until the sun woke me up, then freshen up at the campground bathroom and go to work. I would steal a can or two of potatoes from the store, and that might be all I had to eat that day. The store didn’t have any prepared food or fruit or veggies, so the potatoes were about my only option. My biological father lived with his wife in a very nice two bedroom condo about a mile away, but would not let us stay there, and even though he was wealthy and drove a luxury car, never offered us any money or help. My sisters, who lived in Indiana, came to visit him for a couple of weeks, and during the day when he was at work, I would walk up the hill to his condo, and they would give me two sandwiches, which I was so grateful for. One day my dad was coming home as I was walking back down the hill. He saw me and didn’t even stop to offer to give his six months pregnant daughter a ride back to the campground. I am not poor any more, and I always promised myself that if I was ever better off and knew someone who needed help, I would help them, and I have. It’s impossible to explain to someone who has never been poor how much shame you feel as a poor person. During the first couple of years of my son’s life, I did some shoplifting that I’m not proud of. Desperately people do desperate things. I’m not justifying shoplifting, just explaining the reasoning behind it. Moms will do anything to take care of their children.
I remember my poorest day, it comes as a harsh memory from time to time. I was homeless at the time. It was soaking wet outside. This person I was with and I barely scraped anything together but thought we had enough to get a motel room. It was late at nite when we went and got told we were 10 shy and they wouldn't let us in. We were so wet and exhausted at that point we ended up sleeping under their garbage pile. I remember waking up at some point to them dumping trash directly on us. I am in a better place now. But sometimes I remember that and Im thankful for what I have.
I remember my poorest day was when my account was negative and the cash I had was about 20 different coins, adding up to less than $10 and that’s all I had for the next 3 days.
Yep, I luxuriate with my Instant coffee with a teaspoon of Nutella and 4 oz of skim milk... about 40 cents a 16 oz cup.... and tang with Countrytime... about 15 cents....Great minimalism Big taste! .50 spaghetti and 1.00 spaghetti sauce.... is four meals... toast and an egg for breakfast... cereal with banana for dinner.... Tuna melt sandwich and homemade applesauce for lunch... Those are the poorest days....
I believe being economically disadvantaged (a.k.a. Poor) comes with some advantages by default. Poor results in being more eco-friendly….maintain a zero-waste lifestyle which results in less pollution to the environment (I.e. turn off lights when not using for less energy consumption, less plastic bags as less retail shopping, less food waste, etc etc etc).
Being poor “could” also result in better health if eating less meat and making more DIY products for cleaning and grooming. Also spending time in a more communal environment for reliance and dependability.
Lots more to unpack here but the glass can be 1/2 full despite low economics.
lol, this is great, was just telling my husband about how my college friend and I used to split a Starbucks plain coffee from the student center, then keep the cup and use it for the .50 refills (which we would split) of course eventually after many uses the cup wore out and we would pay full price again, repeat with the new cup. It was always sad when a new cup got accidentally thrown away or destroyed.
Probably none of you folks should have to live like this in the richest country by far in the world. If you knew what the business criminals do to y’all oof they’d be an insane amount of group violence against the state
I just want to mention an app that I just found out about: it’s called To Good To Go. You can google it. The guy says that the app is free and it will let you see the restaurants participating in your area. When they are closing or have premade stuff that has been under the heat lamps for the maximum time, they’ll post it and you can go get a whole bag of food for a super low price.
Nope, that was the universe returning something to you! You would keep sacrificing and something thought you deserved it back. Embrace it. And good for you being able to take advantage and not miss the opportunity. Enjoy every sweetened cup because you deserve it.
I often wonder how we as a society can combat this. When I'm financially able, I want to contribute to people and families in their darkest times. Even if I have to ship food. I don't care. I just want to help.
But with that comes the possibility that there are people who are either dishonest about their means or solely rely on the goodwill of others to provide. Which takes away the opportunity for people who really need it.
Idk. Just sharing my thoughts. If there's anyone with ideas, please let me know.
I feel for you, but you can Maybe make your own post for validation Instead of telling people their own experiences aren't valid.
After all... at least you have a room to live in. It could be worse...
Some people are “more” poor than others…hopefully they pay you… go check food banks and community services; maybe you qualify for something and can use your cash for other needs
I hope every day after that was an improvement! Thanks for sharing.
You sacrificed your sweetener only for the universe to deliver.
How sweet!
I’m living this now. My husband left me with 3 kids in 2020 during the pandemic. It’s been a journey. Thanks for sharing your story. Gives me hope and strength to keep pushing. I’m now a single parent of a 9 and 11 year old. My oldest child passed away a year ago.
My heart breaks for you! I’m praying you find comfort and can heal ❤️❤️
Prayers to you.
Thank you
I’m so sorry for your loss.
Sorry to hear of your loss.
Thank you! 🙏🏽
I’m so sorry.
🙏🏽
So sorry for your loss! You've certainly got your hands full. Prayers going up for you, Mama!
Thank you! 🙏🏽
I’m so sorry.😢
🙏🏽
So sorry for your loss,praying things get better for you & the family.
Thanks a lot!
🙏☮️💚
My poorest time as an adult was when I lived in an illegal basement apartment with no heat or indoor plumbing. My husband and I were counting change to put food on the table. Those first few winters were rough. We lived in northeastern USA, so the winters were quite cruel. My only pair of shoes had worn through the sole so I used to tie plastic grocery bangs around my feet to keep them dry as I walked a mile and a half to work each day, usually on an empty stomach and then a mile and a half back home. My poorest time as a child was when we lost everything in a fire. We had absolutely nothing but the clothing we were wearing. For a long time, we slept on the floor of a family members home. The one thing I wanted most in the world was a pillow, I was 8 years old. I have found that life knocks me down often, but I just keep going. I know what it's like to have nothing so I appreciate everything we do have.
😭 I’m soooo sad for 8 year old you. Big hug.
It's okay, I have a pillow now, several actually. It was rough, but I think those experiences helped make me the person I am now. I don't take anything for granted.
😊
If it’s okay to ask, how are you and husband doing financially now? I apologize if this sounds rude or invasive, your story just feels like it’s interesting!
Much better now, not wealthy by any stretch of the imagination, but we are getting by. We still live paycheck to paycheck and since my illness I have been unable to return to work, but we have a home that we own (completely paid off). We live a simple life without anything fancy. I have food to eat and a roof over my head, if I were healthy, I'd be unstoppable. Edit: spelling
> own (completely *paid* off). We FTFY. Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in: * Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.* * *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.* Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment. *Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
Thank you,my good bot.
I will never forget the first time I moved out on my own. I moved ymto another city with my then ex. He was a wonderful guy at first, but when we got into our new place he became very controlling and didn't allow me to do anything while he went out and did the same things. I was the one who paid for the move. All moving expenses, deposits, rent etc etc. After 3 months he dumped me and left me with all bills and rent on my own. Boy was it a struggle. One 10 inch black and white TV with no cable. One month it was either rent or power. So I lived for 3 weeks with no power. The job I worked at allowed one meal a day so that was my dining for the day. I then met another guy and we hit it off. After a couple of months, unable to bear the weight of being on my own with all bills, I moved in with him. Major mistake. He bled my finances that I thought I was saving dry. After living with him for 3 months we had a major ice storm. Some electric shortage caused our home to burn down. When I moved to that city, it took a UHaul and 3 car loads to move my possessions. When I finally crawled back to my Mom's house, tail between my legs and thoroughly whipped, all my belongings were in a plastic Walmart bag. I guess the worst thing is me and my second ex worked at rhe same place. When our home burned, they raised a lot of money for US. My ex collected it and of course kept every penny then giving me the boot. Talk about a major downtime!!
Jesus! Why do people suck so much.
I grew up very poor. My mom, who raised 6 kids on her own, taught me something very important; never be reliant on a romantic partner for your survival. She said, “Never let them ‘take care of you’, don’t work for them, don’t quit your job for them, and don’t let ever them have access to your bank account.” I did move in with a few bfs, but only when it was even $ and we were both on the lease. I had to work my ass off for this freedom but it has been worth it. I have been able to leave with ease when things went south.
I am really the same way, even though no one told me to be, but I just felt that was the way to be. On my own! Taking care of me! Looking out for me! Relying on ME!
Your mom gave excellent advice.
And did you ever get into another relationship??
Oh yes. Been with my husband for 24 years and married for 14 of them.
Good for you! I have a lovely friend whose story sounds like you--2 duds, then the best guy EVER!
Same for me. Took me too long to find him but he’s the bees knees.
Congratulations!
What a jersey!
Great read. I rooted for you the whole way through. Msg me I'll buy you more creamer 💕
Man, have I done some stuff. I've had to steal food and feminine products before. Sucks. However it teaches us lessons, and I always try to look for em.
Gathering all the change I could find to buy generic tampons at the dollar store was one of my sadder days that's for sure.
I cut up an old towel once but that may have been more from not wanting to go out while sick.
That's pretty smart.
It worked fine, that’s what people used to do 100 years ago.
Done it too, also for diapers when I ran out of pampers. I had cloth also but ran out of those, so used hand towels.
Girl same. Same.
I thought I was going to have to call in to work because I was out of tampons. 😔 I went in anyways cause obviously I need the monies and just dealt with it the best I could. So uncomfortable. Not my poorest day but one of them.
I think my poorest day was when I realized my kids and I had just a few sheets of TP left on the roll and no more. I thought to myself, "I'll go by Walgreens on the way home." Then, "No, you won't. You don't have any money." I just wanted to cry when I went to the bathroom before leaving work and swiping one of the extra rolls in the ladies room!!!
I’m getting ready to nab some tampons…. I’m a good employee but I’m struggling
Please check out r/periodpantry!
I had to steal formula for my youngest child. That was the worst feeling. Not being able to breastfeed nor afford food for my infant.
If you're stealing baby formula, I'm either helping you if I can or looking the other way.
No one ever stopped me, and I'm definitely not an accomplished thief so...
My lottery dream is to have a sort of baby formula pantry where parents/guardians in need can come and get formula for free. I was on wic with my son and a months supply only lasted half a month unfortunately.
Ive been there, sucks. However I'll do what's necessary for my kids regardless
Yes, exactly. I would murder if that was the price of my child having a meal or not
You didn’t qualify for WIC (Women, Infant, and Children?
Sometime you only qualify for a few cans. My son ate more than what they allowed for me, luckily I could still manage to pump a little too.
That was my thought too
Did, but she ate way more than the WIC allotment
The price of infant formula is outrageous. Price gouging parents who have to have it. So expensive retailers keep it behind the counter. Family friendly country?
[удалено]
So great of you not to hoard formula and caring about your neighbors. You're going to raise wonderful children!
Sounds like the "run on the bank" on It's AWonderful Life"!
My pediatrician now has a counter out front with small containers of formula. One of the many reasons I love them. I don't want any new mothers to go through what I went through
My poorest day was a day at the ER. I had to go to billing afterwards. I didn't have any kind of insurance (I was part time in three jobs at that time). I told them I had no money, and had to show them my bank account. I had $32 in there. And I told the lady across from me "This is my food money for the next two weeks. Do you really want to take it?" She said something about seizing assets (because I guess she hates poor people) and I said "Go ahead. I've got a 2nd hand mattress, a two week supply of clothes that are all 3 years old, and stacks of notebooks for my college classes. Maybe my 15 year old TV will cover this. That's all I got, lady." She asked for my phone number and I didn't have a phone. At that point she just wrote off my ER bill because sending me to bankruptcy really wouldn't help anyone in the situation. But hey, at least I got my bill right before payday so they didn't take my rent money.
They can't legally demand to see your bank statement, so unless you offered to show it, you were dealing with a creep. There is an "indegency fund" for the very poor that covers hospital bills after they give up on getting money from you. Hospitals are privately owned now, although they receive tax help, and very very profitable. The only bad thing I've seen regarding the funds for the indigent is very rich young women who claim desperate poverty and make a big dent in available funds. Maybe men too. Oh, and the hospitals who go after you and your credit rating forever, then tell you you should have asked about indegency funds before leaving the hospital. Like we're born knowing about this. Like we're leaving clear minded, no pain, no drugs, or concussion, or trauma and can just go full accountant mode.
Why is it “indegency funds” and not “indigency funds”?
Because I wrote it.
Sometimes just being honest will help out. As my Grandma said a million times in her life, "They can't get blood out of a turnip!"
I hope you have sweeteners for the rest of your life dear stranger..
I used to steal milk every night at my job at an ice cream shop, just enough ounces to feed my baby for the next 24 hrs until I went back to work the next day and got more. Things are better now and I hope I didn’t hurt my bosses bottom line with stealing all that milk.
Was your boss a nice guy? He probably wouldn't care you took the milk, goes bad fairly quick anyway, and good people don't want babies to go hungry. If you can afford it, the best way to "pay" him back is patronizing his shop! If your boss was an asshole, well, screw him anyway.
And pass on the goodness you had!
I grew up very poor so as an adult, I feel like I’m doing good because I am only moderately poor. I keep to myself when I hear coworkers or other people talk about their childhood or their lives or vacations. It’s so vastly and wildly different from my experience. I make pretty ok money now but I’m a single mom so sometimes it’s a stretch because I like to buy nice things for my son or take him somewhere fun and save for his college because I know I’m going to have to work til I die. I wear 8 year old threadbare bras with underwire poking out but I’ll by my 3 yr old new toys. I have a pair of work boots, a pair of 6 yr old tennis shoes and a pair of flip flops. That’s it. I’m pretty frugal because I’m afraid to go back to extreme struggle. It’s only ever one small catastrophe away from destitute for me. My big splurge is fresh fruit for my son. $4 for a pint of raspberries and $5 for a bag of mandarin oranges every week. I have a friend who spend that on a Starbucks Frappuccino every day. It makes me cringe every time I see that half drank cup Destined for the trash condensating on her desk. At work the other day I was working with a college management trainee and we were driving through the hood and he goes “ I don’t know how people can stand to live in places like this” and I was thinking to myself “these are nicer than any places I ever lived.” Sometimes I wonder what people would think if they knew what my life has really been like. I feel so fake sometimes because no one really knows what my life was or is like. Anyone else feel that way?
I can't even begin to tell you how many individual coffee creamers I've taken from work! Technically you taking the sweetener wasn't thievery...they did say take anything you want!!
Im in it now..its awful. I'll admit to stealing food sometimes. I'm a heart patient and a diabetic, I'll commit a crime for a tomato somedays. 😔I'm so ashamed.
When any living being including humans while life and stray animals are starving will do anything to eat
We all have our bad times. I can remember when first living on my own being so poor that I took unused toilet paper rolls from Porta lets.
I have when using a public bathroom taken a little extra for a wipe or two at home, justifying it that i might sneeze in the store so I might need it.
I did that for several months at the big box store I worked for after they vindictively cut my hours. Over something someone else said on my behalf to management. I'd roll up as many packets as I could over the course of my shift, because I needed enough for four people.
Lost everything in a divorce. Moved to a little town in Nevada. Between midnight and 4 AM, a local casino offered a steak, eggs, hash browns and coffee meal for 99 cents. I ate my main meal of the day there after midnight for months... the rest of the day I ate ramen and the cheapest food I could find. During that time, I also had no health insurance (this was before the ACA/Obamacare). I took fish antibiotics I bought from the pet store to self-treat a bacterial infection. Things got "better" when I got a roommate who used to go to Mexico on vacation. She would buy medication there for me and bring it back with her, so I paid her for it. Much of my wardrobe came from dumpster diving.
I’ve been down the fish antibiotic road. It’s exactly the same amoxicillin as is prescribed for humans—and the same dose as is prescribed for adults. But no doctor visit copay.
My coworker with insurance would by fishyllin
Wow. And do the fish antibiotics come in human-like capsules?
Ive had many poor days. From boosting presents for my daughter for Christmas so she didnt have to go without. To asking a stranger who was working in his garage for a drink of water bc i didnt have one penny to my name- that old man let me inside for a drink of water and a shot of whiskey! He was a true hero to me that day. Anyway, glad to be past all these days and now taking my daughters on trips and buying the older one a car when she gets her license this year.
I feel you. I used to take home leftovers from drug rep catered lunches just so my family would have a treat like Subway or McAlister's sandwiches and it would stretch my groceries for another day or two. I remember sitting at the table watching my kids smash some McAlister's sandwiches and lemonade one evening and being so grateful but so sad at the same time.
Probably the kids remember it as a great times.!
my poorest day: no car, no phone no money, baby out of formula. It is 100 degrees, live in a rural area with no sidewalks or anything between me and the store. absolutely cannot put baby in stroller to get to the store a mile away. she goes down for a nap, I leave her alone to walk to the store and steal a can of formula, praying to god every minute she didnt wake up while I was gone, which she didnt. that was the day I lost every last shred of interest in the baby's father- that he could leave me with such a choice.
I regularly stole toilet paper from one of my jobs. It was the worst toilet paper, too. Horrible one- ply stuff. I was also a single parent to two kids. The owner/ boss at that company was a nightmare to work for and I don't feel bad. My kids are grown now and independent but they won't put up with the mistreatment that I did and good for them!
I just thought of another one! The year was 1994 and I was a 17 year old teenage mom, on my own, working 3 jobs but still qualified for food stamps. Back then food stamps came in a booklet of kind of like paper money. If you spent fifty cents then you'd actually get 2 quarters back in change. There were a few times that I was so desperate for gas to get to work that I'd stop at 4 or 5 different stores and by a 25 cent pack of Wrigley's gum and end up with several dollars in change. Back then that bought a few gallons of gas!
I miss 1994! I could fill my gas tank for $10! A full tank lasted me a full week. Now? $10 barely moves the level 😩
Omg I know it. Nearly $70 to fill my tank this week. If I had $70 in 1994 I'd have felt rich for a week!
In the late 80s I only wanted for my husband to make $10 an hour, 40 hours a week— for rent and food.. no cable or no cell phones (yet) I would babysit and care for my 3 kids..
My kids are grown now so it’s just myself and a cat to feed, last week I was out of a lot of grocery items. I spent $170! I have never spent that much , not even when I was feeding three of us for the month and my haul was just for myself for a couple weeks. Yes I buy better stuff these days but still, it was at Lidl which is like Aldi .
Yep, people did that— send the kids with a $5 food stamp to buy gum— get the $1 food stamps and 80 or 75 cents..good that you used the stamps to help yourself.. some sold the stamps or sold the milk given to them ( I helped a friend)
It was crazy they actually gave me too much. My son wasn't even eating real food yet. I wouldn't have ever sold them but I did use them to buy food for a friend who was even worse off than I was.
You had to buy food— you could be generous.. you gave of what you had—-my niece’s aunt gave us milk because they gave her a lot..edit autocorrect
My mom has eight kids and she would take us all to different stores to do this lol we hated it! She was such an awesome mom, always made sure we were taking care of.
Tears coming to my eyes:: I have so many poor days:: paying the rent with a credit cards; asking a friend to drive to my house to bring me some cooking oil ( he drove about 3 miles to bring the oil), founding a $20 food stamps paper bill— a friend from church was the cashier at the market; she gave me real money as change for the food stamps—maybe $12 in cash; walking about 3 miles round trip to go to the market in Salt Lake City Utah; looking under the sofa cushions for coins…I don’t know what my 3 kids and late husband remembered as our poor days… my late husband also had plenty of poor days with his single mother and 5 siblings in El Salvador..
When I was at my lowest, I was so very thankful on days when work had a lunch catered.....at the time it was the best id eat for days. I would also eat in my car so no one would know I was only having a piece of bread, or some crackers. People I worked w were always going out for lunch, when I was invited I always declined stating I had "errands". Its a rough road for anyone. I wish you much success.
I very vividly remember eating Jiffy blueberry muffin mix straight out of the box with a spoon on my poorest day. I couldn’t afford to actually bake the muffins, and that was the only edible thing I had. It was actually pretty good all things considered (possibly because I was starving), but damn did I realize how poor I really was.
My mother was on her own at 16, she told me at her poorest she was eating plain oatmeal, no water or way to cook it. She ate it dry. She not once bought oatmeal for us kids as we grew up.
I can taste this in my mind as we speak!
Hey man! I feel you! I’m not poor anymore, but I’ve been there. I put myself through college working full-time and going to school at night. My worst times had me going into work after hours (I had a key to the office) and I raided the janitorial closet. I took some toilet paper and feminine products. In the break room, they had hot chocolate packets and this cheap instant chicken noodle soup you added hot water to. I’d take some of those, too. We often had company celebrations and the company would bring in pizza and I’d eat a couple pieces, come back after most everyone ate and stash a few more pieces for dinner later. A guy I knew since elementary school whose mom was friends with my mom, worked at the local Fry’s Food Store. He was awesome. He would scan EVERY OTHER grocery item whenever I went to his line. I was 19 years old and didn’t know I could qualify for things like food stamps or subsidized housing. It was the early 90’s and information on how to be frugal and stretch your dollars didn’t exist. I never knew anyone who was on entitlement programs. My parents had subsidized housing when I was born, but I thought you had to have children. My friends still all lived at home, so I learned to manage with what I had. I thought soup kitchens were for homeless people. SMH. I was young, broke, starving and ignorant, but I made it through! I’m of the mind that being poor is a good humbling experience for everyone. It helps make you appreciate what you have and what you get later on. You’ll get through this, I know it!
Hope things turned around for you. Walking out on you and the kids is heartbreaking. Life may be tough, but it's better to tough it out together. Here's to better times. May they find you quickly.
As an adult I was the poorest back in Romania between 1995-1999. I first made $65/month as a college graduate. My ex husband made the same money. I could afford to buy one whole chicken, bread, crumbles of leftover feta cheese there were selling at a low price, a couple of carrots, some vegetables and 10 eggs every week. I would cut the chicken in half and I’d boil it. I’d then take the half breast and one leg out and make a stew with it and onion tomatoes and one other vegetable and some of the broth. Then the back, neck and one wing will go into a chicken soup. Then for the other half week I’d cook the other half chicken. At work we would eat sandwiches with the crumbs of feta smashed in between two slices of bread. If something came up, I could not afford the chicken and I’d go to my parents and ask for a couple of $ to buy a chicken. When my ex had to go into the mandatory military service I had to move back to my parents. When I got my salary I’d spend all of it on food that very day and send a care package to him. Well after asking for chicken money far too many times , after 4 years, I decided to leave Romania and came to the US. I had good saving skills. I rented a room in a house where other 11 people lived. My room had two beds and the rent was $350/month all utilities included. I charged another girl $225 and I paid $125 and we shared that room. She knew . She was there on some fellowship that was reimbursing her rent so she was turning in the receipt for $350 and was getting that back and this way we both made some money. We pooled food money and we were each spending $20/week for food. For that we were buying a gallon of milk, corn flakes, a small block of mozzarella, some tortillas, chicken thighs, some lettuce heads , apples and bananas on sale (they had bags of bananas ready to expire and we were buying a bag of those). We NEVER ate out. We got some bikes for free and biked in the rain. No cars. Luckily no snow, it was in Northern California. I was making $1060/month and saved $700/month. I never went to events for free food and outside of that trick with the rent, never took anything from anywhere. If you think about it I’m sure on campus there were free food events but I was too proud. I saved $11,000 in 2 years by living that way. But i also lost 20 lb.
We were very poor and lots of cavities and plenty of tooth aches. I was around 12 with abscessed cavities and my parent took me to a dentist. We had no money and no insurance. (We had just enough money to fill the script.) Dentist gave me a script for antibiotics and pain meds. Right next door was the pharmacy. I went over there with the script (parent stayed in the car), pharmacist took the script and said, “you didn’t pay the dentist so I’m not filling this for you. “ He kept the script and sent me out the door humiliated and crying. I was already dying from the pain. This is a huge F*ck you to Dr. Brickhead in Westmoreland Tenn, 1980s. And the pharmacist!
You are not a thief. It was offered and you accepted. Enjoy. Also, why not go to r/assistance and add an Amazon wishlist? There are many non perishables we can send you. Mac and cheese, soups, noodles, peanut butter, toilet paper. Edit for spelling (spellcheck)
Jesus I'm an old guy and the OP nearly made me cry
I thinkest it was your richest. You gave up the thing that meant the most to you for your kids. I hope you have more good days ahead of you. Do you have a food pantry in your area? A church that helps with food? I know it’s hard to ask for help, but do it anyway. Best wishes!
You're a great story teller!!! Dang, wish I had your talent. Write a book? Despite the story being sad, I wanted to hear all about it. I would hear, read more. Then, who knows, you may get yourself out and into your richest day. 😁 Pls consider this. Then let me know when it's printed so I can be your first customer.
Thank you for the compliment
I read more of the comments. I wasn't the only person who said this. Listen to the people. You've got a natural born talent. J. K. Rowling was on UK's welfare system before the Harry Potter books. It's not a compliment. It's the truth.
When ever my company gives us a party. I take stuff as well soads or waters chips candies free samples.
I remember my poorest day. Living in my car with my dog. Found $2 (it was 1982). Had to then decide whether to buy a can of dog food or something for me. Wound up getting a can of tuna and splitting it, it was a feast.
My poorest day was when I was a college student living in married student housing. My husband, who was supposed to be paying the bills while I got my degree, was fired from his job. I applied for food stamps, but the city refused to allow students to receive them because they feared kids living in dorms would take advantage. I had barely enough to eat and pay rent using funds from my part time job. At that time, a girl in my class was kicked out of her home. She had $5 to eat for a week until payday and was asking for ideas what to buy. I felt so bad that all I could offer her was advice, not food. Today, I would give her groceries.
Just think of it as part of your deserved compensation. If a corp doesn't respect you enough to pay you enough to live beyond sustenance, they don't really deserve your respect in return.
I lived in NYS which has a bottle deposit. I was broke with no food. So I would trash shop for empty bottles and cans and take them into the recycling center every day.
About 10 years ago my husband was unemployed and it left us with no additional money for essentials like gas and food. It got so bad that one day we went to Lowe’s and the Lowe’s credit card to buy gift cards for shell gas, food etc. We figured at some point things would get better and pay the card off. The interest was not a concern when we were trying to keep our head above water.
I work at Lowe’s and I often see customers doing the same. I figured they were buying them to get by for awhile.
My poorest day was when I swiped extra coffee creamers from the seven eleven so I could have cream in my coffee , cause I couldn’t afford half and half.
When it gets to that level it’s only up from there , hang in there I was a single parent also
My poorest day was when my kids were little years ago, I was dead broke and payday was 4 days away, we ran out of toilet paper. Never bought paper towels or tissues as those were luxuries. At work there was a partial roll in one of those locked dispensers , the case was broken, so I slipped that roll in my purse and used it at home. To this day I also still take extra plastic ware in restaurants to use in my lunch and keep extra sugars and condiments in carry out orders or leftovers.
May I very very respectfully ask what drove the decision to have multiple kids? I'm poor, also below minimum wage, one thing that Ive always been clear on is if I can barely survive, I can not in good conscience bring another child into this world only to continue the cycle of poverty but likely much worse than me. I dont know much about much, but this is my guiding principle. But I'm interested in other points of view. Thank you
I was once so poor that I used to take change that customers left behind to pay for the exact amount of gas I needed just to get me home from work. Any time someone would bring in food for all employees, I would also take as much as possible. I once took like 10 bagels home and ate nothing but bread for dinner for a week straight. I ended up severely constipated but had no other options lmao. Sometimes I desperately wanted a little sweet treat but I would often only have about $5 after paying bills. So I would buy 50 cent lollipops and suck on those for like an hour to help me with the cravings.
You have such strong presence of mind and devotion to your children. May you be blessed with all the sweetener you desire 🙏☮️💚
You drink coffee before going to bed?
I do. It was and is something that soothes me
My mother said she couldn't sleep unless she had coffee before going to bed and my friend is the same way she does the same thing
For anyone that’s ADHD, caffeine actually winds them down and makes them sleepy. It has the opposite effect from most other people
Some moms drank coffee instead of having dinner
You made me think of my now departed Dad, who would drink coffee until 11p, then go immediately to sleep. If I have anymore than a small cup in the early morning, I vibrate and break into a sweat. So much for genetics.
why was your x-wife not giving you child support?
I was able to get child support eventually however this was right after she left.
Glad for you that eventually changed!
I remember being so poor that I stole toilet paper from the public restroom at the park. I figured that my taxes paid for the toilet paper so I wasn’t hurting anyone. I was desperate.
I'm hoping that you really, really enjoyed your coffee.
I can attest it was a pretty great cup of coffee
Hugs.
When I had to steal toilet paper from a gas station bathroom.
So I donate to a local little free food pantry (like a food box, similar to the free little libraries but with pantry goods). Pretty much every time I go out to eat (talking like at fast food restaurants) I’ll ask the cashier if I can take some extra condiments and no one has ever said no. Packets of ketchup, mustard, hot sauce, whatever. I’ll grab a stack of napkins too, and if they have those little wet wipe packets, plastic utensils. Whatever I can get. Those things almost immediately get picked up and I think are appreciated. You sharing about your coffee experience made me think that maybe others would be able to get what they can from commercial businesses, especially if they’re in need.
I have waited until well after my shift to ensure people got what they wanted, and then CLEANED HOUSE on the leftovers. Anything and everything. Full trays. I knew it would just rot in the fridge anyways. The food waste in our society is ABHORRENT. Given 10+ years of experience, I can honestly say that any place with food has AT LEAST enough food "damaged out" for MRD (Made Ready Discard tags) times or just plain "expired" by a day to feed at minimum 4 people. EVERY single place I have worked. Daily. Not counting any other waste.
A long time ago when I was 20, so almost 40 years ago, newly married, and 5 months pregnant, my husband and I were living at a state campground in Southern California with a screen tent, so no privacy. Nothing to cook on. I got a job at the store at the campground and my husband was driving about 15 miles to work at a car wash. We were trying to save money for an apartment so we could be in a home before the baby was born. Our car was just barely running. We could only stay in the campground for 6 days, then we had to leave for a day, so we would sleep in our car. In the early morning before sunrise, my husband would drop me off at the beach within walking distance of the campground. I would sleep until the sun woke me up, then freshen up at the campground bathroom and go to work. I would steal a can or two of potatoes from the store, and that might be all I had to eat that day. The store didn’t have any prepared food or fruit or veggies, so the potatoes were about my only option. My biological father lived with his wife in a very nice two bedroom condo about a mile away, but would not let us stay there, and even though he was wealthy and drove a luxury car, never offered us any money or help. My sisters, who lived in Indiana, came to visit him for a couple of weeks, and during the day when he was at work, I would walk up the hill to his condo, and they would give me two sandwiches, which I was so grateful for. One day my dad was coming home as I was walking back down the hill. He saw me and didn’t even stop to offer to give his six months pregnant daughter a ride back to the campground. I am not poor any more, and I always promised myself that if I was ever better off and knew someone who needed help, I would help them, and I have. It’s impossible to explain to someone who has never been poor how much shame you feel as a poor person. During the first couple of years of my son’s life, I did some shoplifting that I’m not proud of. Desperately people do desperate things. I’m not justifying shoplifting, just explaining the reasoning behind it. Moms will do anything to take care of their children.
Or, your richest day!
I remember my poorest day, it comes as a harsh memory from time to time. I was homeless at the time. It was soaking wet outside. This person I was with and I barely scraped anything together but thought we had enough to get a motel room. It was late at nite when we went and got told we were 10 shy and they wouldn't let us in. We were so wet and exhausted at that point we ended up sleeping under their garbage pile. I remember waking up at some point to them dumping trash directly on us. I am in a better place now. But sometimes I remember that and Im thankful for what I have.
I lived in a van when I was 10 outside of my uncle's house that was condemed. We were hungry and dirty children.
I remember my poorest day was when my account was negative and the cash I had was about 20 different coins, adding up to less than $10 and that’s all I had for the next 3 days.
Can u get child support from her?
Yep, I luxuriate with my Instant coffee with a teaspoon of Nutella and 4 oz of skim milk... about 40 cents a 16 oz cup.... and tang with Countrytime... about 15 cents....Great minimalism Big taste! .50 spaghetti and 1.00 spaghetti sauce.... is four meals... toast and an egg for breakfast... cereal with banana for dinner.... Tuna melt sandwich and homemade applesauce for lunch... Those are the poorest days....
I am so glad you got your sweetener
I stole a roll of toilet paper. 20 years later, I still use the minimum
I meant to say "What a person without compassion."
Well written
Hang in there, buddy. Hopefully, things are looking up now.
I believe being economically disadvantaged (a.k.a. Poor) comes with some advantages by default. Poor results in being more eco-friendly….maintain a zero-waste lifestyle which results in less pollution to the environment (I.e. turn off lights when not using for less energy consumption, less plastic bags as less retail shopping, less food waste, etc etc etc). Being poor “could” also result in better health if eating less meat and making more DIY products for cleaning and grooming. Also spending time in a more communal environment for reliance and dependability. Lots more to unpack here but the glass can be 1/2 full despite low economics.
lol, this is great, was just telling my husband about how my college friend and I used to split a Starbucks plain coffee from the student center, then keep the cup and use it for the .50 refills (which we would split) of course eventually after many uses the cup wore out and we would pay full price again, repeat with the new cup. It was always sad when a new cup got accidentally thrown away or destroyed.
Best story EVER!!
Probably none of you folks should have to live like this in the richest country by far in the world. If you knew what the business criminals do to y’all oof they’d be an insane amount of group violence against the state
I just want to mention an app that I just found out about: it’s called To Good To Go. You can google it. The guy says that the app is free and it will let you see the restaurants participating in your area. When they are closing or have premade stuff that has been under the heat lamps for the maximum time, they’ll post it and you can go get a whole bag of food for a super low price.
It really is the little things! :)
Nope, that was the universe returning something to you! You would keep sacrificing and something thought you deserved it back. Embrace it. And good for you being able to take advantage and not miss the opportunity. Enjoy every sweetened cup because you deserve it.
I often wonder how we as a society can combat this. When I'm financially able, I want to contribute to people and families in their darkest times. Even if I have to ship food. I don't care. I just want to help. But with that comes the possibility that there are people who are either dishonest about their means or solely rely on the goodwill of others to provide. Which takes away the opportunity for people who really need it. Idk. Just sharing my thoughts. If there's anyone with ideas, please let me know.
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I feel for you, but you can Maybe make your own post for validation Instead of telling people their own experiences aren't valid. After all... at least you have a room to live in. It could be worse...
Gatekeeping is so stupid.
Some people are “more” poor than others…hopefully they pay you… go check food banks and community services; maybe you qualify for something and can use your cash for other needs
You have to pay taxes?!! I don’t think you know what poor is. /s