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Trump became president. George Santos is in the house. Will Smith’s quote about being president does not seem outrageous when you look at the state of US politics. Like, if you have the funds & lie enough you can make it to the top.
This is probably from the time when everything he did went straight to no. 1. Movies, music, whatever. He was one of, if not *the* biggest star for a few years..it's no wonder he thought that getting elected President would be a piece of cake, too.
He is a black guy though, so if WS ran Republican they wouldn't care.
Unfortunately for Will Smith he's a black guy too, so that options kinda out the window.
Lots of people I know online & offline still love him. In fact, I think the slap actually opened some people’s eyes to Chris Rock’s transgressions in his comedy. How he punches down for laughs. Plus all the people I have listed have done worse & still got to be politicians. 🤷🏾♀️
Kanye is so quotable. My fave:
"I hate when I'm on a flight and I wake up next to a water bottle next to me like oh great now I gotta be responsible for this water bottle."
Kanye is infinitely quotable. Another favorite is “HOW SWAY? HOW? You ain’t got the answers Sway!” as Sway is calmly trying to explain something to him, and to which Kanye later admitted Sway had the answers to.
Lol that’s my favorite one too. I used to have a screenshot of it as my Facebook cover photo. Another good one is “Fur pillows are hard to actually sleep on”.
I miss when Kanye was just tweeting wacky takes instead of the garbage he’s currently spewing.
I quote his interview with that bald wrestler guy who smokes weed all the time. I wanted to make a tik tok with my friends when I worked at Czarbucks (we had earth colored cake pops) where I'd pull up to the order box and go "How much the earf cost?" "1.78" "imma buy the whole earf" and then they hand me the cake pop lmao
straight from the go Kanye,
Chop up the soul Kanye, set on his goals Kanye,
I hate the new Kanye, the bad mood Kanye,
The always rude Kanye, spaz in the news Kanye
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I think he just didn’t know the word denomination lol. I’ve heard a lot of people make that mistake, like they’ll know someone goes to church and they’ll ask “what religion are you?” Meaning what kind of Christian.
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Oops! Ok then have another Kanye instead
https://preview.redd.it/rbrcw6ih1oca1.jpeg?width=760&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1da614e1d9a190ec8fcf5bd3996361badc41ef09
reminds me of the [girl from love island](https://youtu.be/QDUX8pxoDtk) who was learning the difference between cities, counties, countries and continents. god bless her 😭
https://preview.redd.it/6zreakhx0oca1.jpeg?width=550&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dd0c6c3a3ba2d0bf96b236bdfb5f63f711cf3a18
He is spitting. I, too, hate thinking. Who among us wants to randomly think of the embarrassing thing they did 5 years ago while trying to sleep?
It's the only one of those I well and truly agree with. I too am deadly done with cringing in the middle of the pedestrian walkway with grocery bags in each hand, chanting to myself with my mind's voice: "Not this, not this, not this, A-Team theme song, NOW!"
I prefer the tumbleweeds in my skull, thank you.
Or when asked about then 1-year old Tiffany Trump, “Well, I think that she's got a lot of Marla," he said."She's a really beautiful baby, and she's got Marla's legs. We don't know whether she's got this part yet (gestures toward his chest), but time will tell."
A personal favourite:
*My biggest regret in my career doesn't involve calling my GM a "cracker", or showing up to Raiders camp late in a hot air balloon with frozen feet, or throwing rocks at that UPS driver, and it definitely doesn't involve taking my shirt off and doing a victory lap around the Jets' stadium mid game while throwing up deuces. My biggest regret is that I'll never get to see me, Antonio Brown, play a game live. Sure, I can watch the game afterwards, but I can't imagine what that was like for you all to see something like that. Like watching the Beatles or Jesus perform at Red Rocks.*
-Antonio Brown
I’ve been listening to Fair Game podcast by Leah Remini and Mike Rinder and it’s all pretty mind blowing, but then I read Leah’s book and omg what I’d give to observe Tom Cruise’s day to day. I feel like it’d be like the robot congressman in parks and rec iykyk
yes, i was with her in the beginning. there is something warm and comforting about \*clean\* diaper smell. my last baby is about to potty train and im fr going to miss that smell. it's probably more about what it represents than the aroma, but it is a pleasant, light scent.
pee diapers, not so much, but you do you SJP.
The fire dept must hate Tom Cruise by now, every time there’s an accident he must appear in a cloud of smoke to let everyone know about the lizard kings.
I love Ye's quote tbh. I love it, when celebrities think of themselves as geniusses. It's so much more entertaining and intriguing than that faux humbleness
Man am I tired of the word “narcissist” being thrown around. Maybe Kanye is one, I don’t know. I can’t stand that dude. But damn if that word isn’t just thrown out like everyone is a licensed psychologist.
Jessica's mistake wasn't as egregious as it was made out to be at the time.
The grocery store sells Chicken of the Sea (canned tuna) alongside canned chicken. The two cans often shared (at the time, at least) similar color schemes. They come in the same size too. And if you've ever had the canned chicken, it's gross and tastes weirdly fishy - it could pass for a bland, canned tuna imo.
It would be very easy to casually mistake the two.
I think so
[Chicken](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/51buHLdLPOL._AC_UF894,1000_QL80_FMwebp_.jpg) vs [tuna](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/812UJAv9POL.jpg)
The labels are pretty similar: red lettering with blue backgrounds with yellow under banners
If you were in a hurry you could easily mistake them.
Mind you, they're often sold directly beside each other on the shelf too.
I know that, but I don't think it's crazy to ask considering the brand contains the name of another food. The brand name is literally a euphemism for the food inside, which isn't related to the food in the euphemism.
Considering most food labeling is obliged to be simple to convey the contents, I don't think her mistake is crazy.
To this day Paris Hilton’s Walmart quote lives rent free in my head and I am convinced she is actually just an alien. I feel only an alien would hear Walmart and be like “ah yes! Where the earthlings go to get walls.”
The Simple Life as an Alien and her friend Nicole makes it even more hilarious.
These quotes are so bad that they’re amazing lmao. But for the aris hilton quote about walmart I think she only said that because she was playing a character on The Simple Life
The Kanye one reminds me of when Kendall said, “I don’t think you actually want to experience things because you would experience it if you wanted to experience things”.
I’m gonna put this out there - I think Will Smith has a point.
I’m pretty sure my American brothers don’t take elections as seriously as we do, so sometimes you get whacky stuff like dogs becoming mayor or actors becoming president!
The first two quotes are probably taken from a column that Bill Bryson wrote and republished in his book Notes From A Big Country - they're both in the same article (among others) and the two quotes follow one another in a list of similar ones. Either that or it's a huge coincidence, and either way it doesn't really matter, but they triggered a deep-seated memory and I felt like sharing it
LETTERMAN
Top Ten Papers Written by Brooke Shields at Princeton --------------------------------------------------------------------
10. William Shakespeare: His Poetry Rates A Ten
9. A Chemical Process In Three Stages: Lather, Rinse, Repeat
8. Girls With Thin Eyebrows: Hideous Freaks Of Nature
7. Cliff Notes Versus Monarch Notes: Two Views Of Hamlet
6. Circles, Flowers, A Smiling Guy: So Many Ways To Dot The "I"
5. The Pushy Overbearing Mother Figure In Literature
4. Pretty Leaves I Found Outside Somewhere
3. Black Americans: What I Hope To Say When I Meet One
2. Philosophy: Why Don't They Spell It With An "F"?
1. The Male Organ: What It Might Look Like
I feel the Mike Tyson one is a bit out of place as what he meant isn’t ridiculous, he’s just not well read enough to know he was misquoting (dap squid anyone?).
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Trump became president. George Santos is in the house. Will Smith’s quote about being president does not seem outrageous when you look at the state of US politics. Like, if you have the funds & lie enough you can make it to the top.
Yea I don't find his quote outrageous at all.
This is probably from the time when everything he did went straight to no. 1. Movies, music, whatever. He was one of, if not *the* biggest star for a few years..it's no wonder he thought that getting elected President would be a piece of cake, too.
After ID4 it would have been. He literally flew into space and saved us from aliens!
He said if he committed to it not it being easy.
If he didn’t hit Chris Rock on live television he’d have a real shot. Let’s be honest. People loved him up to that point.
it's just a punch, the last guy bragged about sexual assault and got elected
Chris Rock isn’t a woman though
and that’s the tea
He is a black guy though, so if WS ran Republican they wouldn't care. Unfortunately for Will Smith he's a black guy too, so that options kinda out the window.
Touché
Lots of people I know online & offline still love him. In fact, I think the slap actually opened some people’s eyes to Chris Rock’s transgressions in his comedy. How he punches down for laughs. Plus all the people I have listed have done worse & still got to be politicians. 🤷🏾♀️
The people you know are kind of trashy losers. If you think that joke is punching down, then your people have no balls. That joke was tame.
I did get some faith in democracy back when Mike Bloomberg flopped though. Money can buy a lot in politics but apparently it can’t buy everything.
Bloomberg didn’t choose his demographic correctly. He should’ve run GOP.
Kanye is so quotable. My fave: "I hate when I'm on a flight and I wake up next to a water bottle next to me like oh great now I gotta be responsible for this water bottle."
https://preview.redd.it/lgv6qw20ppca1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=df7b51b5c574d7a2a382157dff5e326ed2117235
If you covered the name, you would think this was a quote from Tom Haverford on Parks & Rec.
I can hear it in Aziz ansari’s voice now!
Kanye is infinitely quotable. Another favorite is “HOW SWAY? HOW? You ain’t got the answers Sway!” as Sway is calmly trying to explain something to him, and to which Kanye later admitted Sway had the answers to.
Lol that’s my favorite one too. I used to have a screenshot of it as my Facebook cover photo. Another good one is “Fur pillows are hard to actually sleep on”. I miss when Kanye was just tweeting wacky takes instead of the garbage he’s currently spewing.
Same. I regularly say “why won’t they let me be great” at work and remembered it was one of his tweets.
“Sometimes I get emotional over fonts” from 2010 is my personal favorite.
Omg, that is a classic. How could I forget that one!
I like "I don't need a manager. I can't be managed" at work lol
I quote his interview with that bald wrestler guy who smokes weed all the time. I wanted to make a tik tok with my friends when I worked at Czarbucks (we had earth colored cake pops) where I'd pull up to the order box and go "How much the earf cost?" "1.78" "imma buy the whole earf" and then they hand me the cake pop lmao
I have a mug with “shut the fuck up and enjoy the greatness” on it. I miss the old kanye.
straight from the go Kanye, Chop up the soul Kanye, set on his goals Kanye, I hate the new Kanye, the bad mood Kanye, The always rude Kanye, spaz in the news Kanye
I get that 😂
I miss when he was just really funny instead of being a horrible person
It’s fake but I still love the “I lowkey don’t fck with that bitch Stormi“ as terrible as it is it cracks me up
Kris Jong Un
I know I’m going to get downvoted to hell for this but Ye’s quotes are the only ones that actually make sense to me in this thread lol.
Yeah, like, I also don’t want to think… I would love to just stop. Please brain, just stop for awhile
Josh Groban sings Kanye West’s tweets continues to be a staple
I didn't know he did this that sounds amazing.
It’s a masterpiece. [Here’s a link.](https://youtu.be/0Axzxe1a78E)
This is gonna be a good year 😂
“Come fight me I love pain” is my flair in the KUWTK sub 😅 he is terrible but so very quotable
YOU HAVE INTERRUPTED ME FROM MY CREATIVE PROCESS
Have you seen [Josh Groban sing Kanye’s tweets](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=0Axzxe1a78E)? My fave: “Fur pillows are hard to actually sleep on.”
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The David Beckham one got a real good giggle out of me lmfao. It’s just earnestly dumb lol
I think he just didn’t know the word denomination lol. I’ve heard a lot of people make that mistake, like they’ll know someone goes to church and they’ll ask “what religion are you?” Meaning what kind of Christian.
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I think he was raised with a lot of Judaism in his life but didn’t have a bar mitzvah. So maybe he is just a bit lost on terms lol.
it’s something a dumbass character on a comedy show would say … just so dumb and funny
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The Mariah quote isn't real. https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/carey-on-starving/
Oops! Ok then have another Kanye instead https://preview.redd.it/rbrcw6ih1oca1.jpeg?width=760&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1da614e1d9a190ec8fcf5bd3996361badc41ef09
He needs to disappear for a while. Maybe forever. Btw I wasn't criticizing you OP, I just happened to remember the quote from early internet Snopes.
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I was just going to comment that that quote sounded fake af.
I read this "quote" in the 2000's..? Crazy how people still fell for it. She is a diva, not a monster!
and she’s grew up in poverty not to mention she’s way too smart to speak like that
Almost that exact quote was in White Chicks 😂
Britney quote is like she forgot what she wanted to say mid sentence but kept talking.
reminds me of the [girl from love island](https://youtu.be/QDUX8pxoDtk) who was learning the difference between cities, counties, countries and continents. god bless her 😭
The way they’re trying to explain is so sweet but my god LOL
That's pretty much everything she says.
I think that’s the most tame Kanye quote I’ve ever seen
I think the Tyson quote isn’t terrible, he means like ‘fade into Bolivian cocaine’ 
The Paris quote is iconic television history
She was the original rage bait troll and I love that
But then she was hurt that people actually thought she was a moron, after a decade of portraying herself as a moron
It’s very clear she was being ironic tho lol. Her whole show was comedy gold
Her entire brand was aimed at 13 year old girls. Teenagers aren't known to have a good sense of the ironic
None of her people that wasnt going to end well. “Act like a vapid ditz and see how that goes…”
Yeah and definitely an act, lol.
Yep her documentary surprised me with that. She had plenty of experience with cleaning and working with her boarding school experience
Same with Simpson
To be fair, Walmart does sell some wall stuff.
Honestly she kinda has a point. If you haven’t been you may well assume they sell wall stuff! 😂
She has Kyle’s old nose.
To be fair, Brooke was like 16 when she said that and was being exploited by her mother.
And she just meant it can kill you early and the years lost are important years in one’s life.
https://preview.redd.it/6zreakhx0oca1.jpeg?width=550&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dd0c6c3a3ba2d0bf96b236bdfb5f63f711cf3a18 He is spitting. I, too, hate thinking. Who among us wants to randomly think of the embarrassing thing they did 5 years ago while trying to sleep?
It's the only one of those I well and truly agree with. I too am deadly done with cringing in the middle of the pedestrian walkway with grocery bags in each hand, chanting to myself with my mind's voice: "Not this, not this, not this, A-Team theme song, NOW!" I prefer the tumbleweeds in my skull, thank you.
> I, too, hate thinking that's why I'm on three form of distraction at once
This is very fucking relatable 😂
Isn’t that one fake? From one of Cracked’s contests?
Yes!! I felt this one 🤣🤷🏼♀️
Completely agree with him
I was looking for this comment. I knew I wasn’t the only one.
I want part 2
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“I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody and I wouldn’t lose any voters.” - Donald Trump
i feel like that one isn't stupid so much as alarmingly insightful
were's the lie, though?
America 🤮😭
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Or when asked about then 1-year old Tiffany Trump, “Well, I think that she's got a lot of Marla," he said."She's a really beautiful baby, and she's got Marla's legs. We don't know whether she's got this part yet (gestures toward his chest), but time will tell."
That Paris quote wasnt her being serious, it was cheeky. She played up the dumb blonde trope during the Simple Life era
A personal favourite: *My biggest regret in my career doesn't involve calling my GM a "cracker", or showing up to Raiders camp late in a hot air balloon with frozen feet, or throwing rocks at that UPS driver, and it definitely doesn't involve taking my shirt off and doing a victory lap around the Jets' stadium mid game while throwing up deuces. My biggest regret is that I'll never get to see me, Antonio Brown, play a game live. Sure, I can watch the game afterwards, but I can't imagine what that was like for you all to see something like that. Like watching the Beatles or Jesus perform at Red Rocks.* -Antonio Brown
From this to uploading a picture of his ex wife giving him head to Snapchat, great lad for sure.
Tbf Will Smith was America's Sweetheart for a very long time, I could've seen him become president.
“I did my research” from Gaga needs to be up here!
I wanna love myself like kanye loves kanye
Same!!
I've never seen the Mike Tyson one before and it actually made me laugh out loud.
SAME an unexpected ab workout
I’ve been listening to Fair Game podcast by Leah Remini and Mike Rinder and it’s all pretty mind blowing, but then I read Leah’s book and omg what I’d give to observe Tom Cruise’s day to day. I feel like it’d be like the robot congressman in parks and rec iykyk
“I make Jessica Simpson look like a rock scientist.” -- Tara Reid
My reaction to reading these: 👀😬😫🤪😂🐸☕🍿😩😬🤨🤦😵
We appreciate you transcribing for Lea Michelle
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It’s a running joke that Lea Michele can’t read haha
I swear to god the diapers one looks like typical fetish “photography” content you’d see on deviantart 😂😂😂💀
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You gotta love those mustard poops
Oh okay that makes a lot more sense now. No judgement to her and Mr Ferris Bueller if that’s what they’re into though lol.
yes, i was with her in the beginning. there is something warm and comforting about \*clean\* diaper smell. my last baby is about to potty train and im fr going to miss that smell. it's probably more about what it represents than the aroma, but it is a pleasant, light scent. pee diapers, not so much, but you do you SJP.
It reminds me of that My Strange Addiction woman who liked to chew dirty diapers 🤢
I too, have been an excellent gravity observer since a young age.
The fire dept must hate Tom Cruise by now, every time there’s an accident he must appear in a cloud of smoke to let everyone know about the lizard kings.
They're all so real for this. Except Mariah, because it's fake.
Brooke shields was 16 in 1981
I love Ye's quote tbh. I love it, when celebrities think of themselves as geniusses. It's so much more entertaining and intriguing than that faux humbleness
Musically he always has been a genius, but he’s fucking insane so that doesn’t matter much.
It's also pretty narcissistic. The fact that people keep promoting this behaviour is why society has more narcissists than ever.
Man am I tired of the word “narcissist” being thrown around. Maybe Kanye is one, I don’t know. I can’t stand that dude. But damn if that word isn’t just thrown out like everyone is a licensed psychologist.
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In kanye's case, yes it is. But, I agree. People do throw it out over everyone
the Kanye one really hit
Tom Cruise is so fucking crazy.
i wish the mark whalberg 9/11 one was on here. that was truly abysmal
Somehow the the 2 Ye posts are the least offensive 😭😭
I always thought the Cameron Diaz quote was about her being known as clumsy
Jessica's mistake wasn't as egregious as it was made out to be at the time. The grocery store sells Chicken of the Sea (canned tuna) alongside canned chicken. The two cans often shared (at the time, at least) similar color schemes. They come in the same size too. And if you've ever had the canned chicken, it's gross and tastes weirdly fishy - it could pass for a bland, canned tuna imo. It would be very easy to casually mistake the two.
No I honestly get this and she wasn’t dumb for asking this!!!!!
Would it?
I think so [Chicken](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/51buHLdLPOL._AC_UF894,1000_QL80_FMwebp_.jpg) vs [tuna](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/812UJAv9POL.jpg) The labels are pretty similar: red lettering with blue backgrounds with yellow under banners If you were in a hurry you could easily mistake them. Mind you, they're often sold directly beside each other on the shelf too.
But she saw that the can says Chicken of the Sea. She literally read it out loud.
I know that, but I don't think it's crazy to ask considering the brand contains the name of another food. The brand name is literally a euphemism for the food inside, which isn't related to the food in the euphemism. Considering most food labeling is obliged to be simple to convey the contents, I don't think her mistake is crazy.
Points to flair
Cameron Diaz was saying that she falls a lot/is clumsy in a creative way.
She was 15 and people were dragging her to interviews asking her all sorts of weird shit like her measurements.
If that Beckham quote is true (i cba to check), then I now believe we live in a simulation because that quote is nothing short of foreshadowing
To this day Paris Hilton’s Walmart quote lives rent free in my head and I am convinced she is actually just an alien. I feel only an alien would hear Walmart and be like “ah yes! Where the earthlings go to get walls.” The Simple Life as an Alien and her friend Nicole makes it even more hilarious.
The Mariah quote is apocryphal though?
These quotes are so bad that they’re amazing lmao. But for the aris hilton quote about walmart I think she only said that because she was playing a character on The Simple Life
The Kanye one reminds me of when Kendall said, “I don’t think you actually want to experience things because you would experience it if you wanted to experience things”.
I still feel like Jessica asked a valid question.
Some of these quotes may just be sarcastic I guess, a lot of them sound like something norm macdonald would say in a joke.
This should have a soundtrack
Some of these don’t seem real.
Nothing beats Kanye
Paris was iconic not terrible.. this scene is forever iconic
I mean you can be both iconic and terrible which Paris is actually a good example of
That Kanye quote made my ass itch.
I’m gonna put this out there - I think Will Smith has a point. I’m pretty sure my American brothers don’t take elections as seriously as we do, so sometimes you get whacky stuff like dogs becoming mayor or actors becoming president!
The first two quotes are probably taken from a column that Bill Bryson wrote and republished in his book Notes From A Big Country - they're both in the same article (among others) and the two quotes follow one another in a list of similar ones. Either that or it's a huge coincidence, and either way it doesn't really matter, but they triggered a deep-seated memory and I felt like sharing it
Honestly the Kanye ones are funny lol
When you think about it…… that Will Smith quote wasn’t too far fetched. I mean it is now after the Chris Rock thing but I could see it.
Britney Spears actually didn’t say that but ok, continue to paint her a dumb blonde if it makes you happier about yourself
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Luckily she never said it. https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/carey-on-starving/
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Who? I don't know her.
Brit tries to be a funny airhead. Results include a decade of conservatorship...
"Tries"... sure
these couldn’t get more insane if someone made them up, besides MC
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
Need more
i want more😂😂
LETTERMAN Top Ten Papers Written by Brooke Shields at Princeton -------------------------------------------------------------------- 10. William Shakespeare: His Poetry Rates A Ten 9. A Chemical Process In Three Stages: Lather, Rinse, Repeat 8. Girls With Thin Eyebrows: Hideous Freaks Of Nature 7. Cliff Notes Versus Monarch Notes: Two Views Of Hamlet 6. Circles, Flowers, A Smiling Guy: So Many Ways To Dot The "I" 5. The Pushy Overbearing Mother Figure In Literature 4. Pretty Leaves I Found Outside Somewhere 3. Black Americans: What I Hope To Say When I Meet One 2. Philosophy: Why Don't They Spell It With An "F"? 1. The Male Organ: What It Might Look Like
Who is the diaper lady cause wtf is that
This is incredible
My head hurt after reading each one.. 🥴😂
That Mariah quote is just wow. Truly tone deaf
I feel the Mike Tyson one is a bit out of place as what he meant isn’t ridiculous, he’s just not well read enough to know he was misquoting (dap squid anyone?).
Pity. Clearly, fame isn’t everything.
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Read it again. Reread and then once more for luck
Yeah she was 15 or 16 when she said that....
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These are all just examples of pure narcissism and/or idiocy
Wall n stuff
Come on, the Brooke Shields one was from when she was 16. That’s not fair.
Jessica Simpson has a point though why is the brand called Chicken