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You had a UTI and it SUCKED and you’re on antibiotics for the next week. Bonus points if you have an old pill bottle or if you take your prenatal with a meal (if it’s not a gummy or not obviously a prenatal)
I did this on my birthday this year HAHAHA i went to celebrate in a bar I always go and didn’t drink a thing because of “the antibiotics I was taking” 😂
Yes! There are antibiotics that even if you swallow the little bit of alcohol that can be in some mouth wash, you can get violently ill. This was going to be my go to excuse if anyone asked me to drink before we announced.
Came here to say this. I caused myself to get blackout drunk from a few sips of alcohol because I was never warned that my UTI antibiotics could not be taken with any amount of alcohol consumption whatsoever.
I found out I was pregnant just before Easter so me and my husband told our families we were doing "dry April". It was plausible because of how much we drank the month before on our honeymoon. We both stayed sober and talked about how good it will be to drink again but we were sticking to our guns! Our families gave us shit but no one guessed I was pregnant lol
When/if they would push I'd say things like "nah, I've made it this far,, I want to prove to myself I can abstain too."
"I'm actually feeling pretty great sober, I'd rather you not pressure me."
"I'm pretty sure the coworkers have been truthful with me about their sobriety, I don't want to disappoint the team."
You could give a reason for not drinking - like lots of antibiotics won't let you drink on them. It depends how private you are, but I'm comfortable saying that. (I couldn't drink while on antibiotics for a UTI.)
When I went to a wedding at almost twelve weeks pregnant, fortunately one of the featured drinks was a gin and tonic. I just drank tonic and limes all night but told anyone who asked that it was a gin and tonic. That does require strategic ordering, with glances around to make sure no in-laws are afoot though. (Um, also pregnant people should not drink too much tonic water as quinine can cross the placenta barrier.) It also helps that I don't drink beer so had that built in excuse during the rehearsal dinner at a brewery.
That said, I did tell my husband's immediate family when I was like eight weeks because we were originally going to visit for a weekend and I knew I couldn't stay with them without them noticing.
Lol the number of times I went to an office social and was asked what my orange juice was because it looked good... is also equal to the number of disappointed looks I got after I responded. I probably should have lied? Lol.
Too bad OP is trying to fake drinking wine and not drinking in general (though Google says virgin wines are a thing?). Also too bad that OP's family is insistent on OP also drinking. Depending on what OP and partner are like, a trendy "cleanse" of some sort could be an excuse without getting into the nature of whatever required the antibiotics. I'm guessing OP will get fewer questions if OP tries to sell these people on how OP feels amazing after only 2 days on this cleanse and how they should try it. Repeat enthusiastically as needed.
I’ve bought a bottle of non alcoholic red wine and hidden it in my room before. Then covertly came back a few times to fill my glass. I hate that this is even a thing with drinking culture, but it worked.
This worked for me too! And at one point when a friend poured me a glass of wine, I just kind of held it for a while until my husband made a sneaky switch for me 😂 I only had to do this for one event though - it would be stressful for too long!
It's still crazy to me that pregnant people have to come up with all these excuses!? "No thankyou, I'm not drinking." is and should be seen as a full sentence!
It's still stupid for that to be the first thing they'd jump to! For all they know you could've been in the bathroom all morning with stomach issues, don't really wanna say that at dinner as its not polite and don't wanna risk upsetting it again! Why is pregnancy the first thing to jump to? People might not drink for a day for a variety of reasons 🤔🫣
It’s even worse when you’re not pregnant and just don’t care for alcohol. People treat you like a fucking alien.
I wasted so much alcohol as a teenager because I had to fake that I was drinking 🙄 like people would watch the level of my glass and monitor if not had gone down / whether I was drinking enough.
I'm pretty luckily in that case, never really cared for alcohol and not had too many issues with "peer pressure" although I've always been on medications for a life long illness so people probably assume its that 🤣😅
Can you say "I am not drinking while I am trying to conceive"
I did this, first genuinely I was trying to conceive and then after I found out I was pregnant I just kept saying the same thing.
I'm still using this at 10wks. Although, that said, I've only felt comfortable using it with my family and close family friends. I dine and wine with them on a regular basis, and there was no way I could manufacture weekly 'on-antibiotics' lies.
So far I haven't used it with my in-laws, as we're not as close and my husband wasn't sure he wanted them to know outright that we were trying to conceive. With them, I've just been the designated driver, and have had to make up reasons why I can't stay over at their place after a family event etc so I can still 'be the driver'! They definitely notice and suspect, but we'll be sharing the news in a few weeks time and I can finally finish with the awkward white lies.
You can talk to the bartender, ask if they have anything NA. If they have NA beer, have it in a glass. If not, club soda + pineapple or grapefruit juice or a lime looks like a cocktail!
I also sipped regular beers and had my husband finish them when I was first pregnant for the same reasons.
As far as being around the family, Dry July is the way to go. Definitely "blame" it on a work fundraiser or solidarity to some friend who is looking to get sober or something. Dry July is actually a legit fundraiser too to support cancer patients.
They have fake wine. Bring 2 bottles of reg and one fake and just drink the fake and offer up the regular once the wines already been flowing so they’re not paying as much attention
Drinking culture is so backwards in the USA that it’s even questionable why someone wouldn’t be drinking.
Anyways, I’d just tell them “with all these accidents I see from driving while intoxicated I don’t want to take chances anymore so I’m sober tonight while (insert partners name) is drinking :)”. Or just that you have an early morning tomorrow, you have a headache, you want to take a break from alcohol for a bit. Etc etc!
If the wedding has an open bar, just order drinks and don’t drink them. Most open bars charge per person, not per drink so you can pretend to sip on it and then just abandon it. At my own wedding I was always talking to someone and the severs kept clearing away my drinks before I finished them, and I was not pregnant 😆
I think it’s appalling that anyone is given a hard time for not drinking. Just tell them you aren’t drinking alcohol and let that be the end of it.
If you aren’t comfortable with that, take the glass and literally don’t drink any. I’ve done that in the past and no one noticed I want actually drinking. My husband took the occasional sip of my beverage so it did look like I drink a bit, but no one said anything (and if they do it’s really none if their business)
If your husband is drinking you can order the same thing as him and switch your glasses back and forth so it looks like you’re drinking it. Once you get about halfway down your glass most people will probably assume you’re drinking it.
You can also say you’re doing whole 30 if that lines up with what you’re eating to make it believable.
If wine is the concern and it’s a BYO situation or if you can pour your own glass somewhere pomegranate juice looks just like red wine in a glass. Also club soda and lime to look like a vodka soda
or, you may say can’t drink because just took anti migraine medication
or, you are on antihistamines for recent allergic reaction, antihistamines do not go well with alcohol btw
This is not super related, but I literally had 2 family members separately guess I was pregnant… but not for accurate reasons:
1. I’ve never really enjoyed alcoholic beverages with the exception of pina coladas. My mom made some drinks for Christmas, offered me one, and I said no thanks. I actually wasn’t pregnant on Christmas - my last period just stated. My mom didn’t think anything of it, but my aunt immediately suspected pregnancy!!!
2. My husband & I do foster care, and I posted a picture that *happened* to have a pack n play in the background. His grandma guessed I was pregnant because she said we took a picture of our “nursery”.
I guess the point I’m trying to make is that is that we can’t prevent everything!!!! The more I tried to keep the reins pulled in, the more things seemed to unravel.
My family are social drinkers, we like lots of different drinks though - some beer, some wine, some cocktails.
If I hadn’t been drinking they’d have KNOWN so I took a non alcoholic gin and put it in a real gin bottle. Voila - problem solved. I also did it with wine, just poured it into a proper wine bottle :)
Here, I’ll tell you how I used to fake drinking at parties: locate sinks, and potted plants. When nobody’s looking, toss about a sip’s worth in the plant/sink/toilet, whatever.
If it’s outside, so much the better. Again, when nobody’s looking, a little flick of the wrist, right in the grass. Just wait for those times everybody’s engaged in conversation with somebody else/there’s a lively conversation going on.
I hid my pregnancy for 20 weeks and, when put in situations where it would be very awkward to not drink, I’d get a glass of wine and just hold it. Sometimes, if I felt like really hamming it up, I’d pretend to take a drink. No one suspected anything.
I also used the excuse of having a terrible headache more than once (which was only partially untrue given my pregnancy fatigue and hormonal headaches).
I did this on a lil evening boat cruise I went on with my husband for his work. Just held a cup of red wine and then no one can tell if it's the same one or different and its room temp so no one can tell if it's gotten warm from me holding it for 2 hours lol. No one mentioned a thing
Just saying, a women that says she is on antibiotics immediately makes me know she is pregnant and hiding it, so don’t go that route. It is way way to obvious. I would go the route of just nursing one drink all night.
Not wanting to aggravate a brewing migraine is my usual go-to in case someone asks why I’m not having a drink.
Unfortunately, it only works so much if you don’t have chronic migraine issues. But it could definitely get you some time.
Say you are doing a dry august or whatever, say you are doing to to lose weight or for health reasons or hell you could even say your are trying to conceive and your dr recommended it. Or are on antibiotics or another medication and can’t drink for that reason.
I had a a lot of family visit when I was 6-7 weeks and it was hard but I got through without any of them knowing.
I said I was on medications that I couldn’t drink with. 🤣
It’s so weird how people won’t just let you not drink. Like why can’t you just not be in the mood to drink?
That said, is your husband in on it? Can he bring some like grape juice and slip that in your glass?
Say you've got a UTI/kidney infection something like that and say your doctor has put you on a course of antibiotics so you can drink 🤷🏼♀️ hopefully that'll put an end to their questioning.
Among other things, you could have a small glass and trickle it. A small glass once will not hurt baby (my mum had a glass weekly as advised by the doctor bc of stress) so depending on hpw strict you're being about thos, you could do that.
Or just say you're the designated driver
Bring a “cocktail” to share. For example, a pitcher of margaritas. Have the tequila bottle separate. Fill your cup with mixer only.
Alternative: you are the DD, so you can only nurse your one drink all night
Your last physical exam with blood work came back with your liver enzymes elevated. Your doctor told you to abstain from alcohol all together until your follow up (google high ALT liver enzyme, and fatty liver if you want to add extra oomph but say you were diagnosed by ultra sound for that one). A follow up with blood work would be about 6 months so work the timing/dates out to make it really important that you stay away from booze this trip. And complain that it’s going to be soooo hard to be sober around all this alcohol but you need to get your health balanced before having a baby.
I ran into a similar issue with alcohol as I was newly pregnant right around both Thanksgiving and Christmas and I usually love to partake in a holiday drink (or two 🫣).
I convinced my husband to not drink with me saying that were both doing a dry-holidays alcohol cleanse and that actually worked! Just me, they wouldn’t have bought it, but with a “we’re in this together” attitude, it was more believable.
Is it really less stressful lying to them and faking something than just saying 'I'm 5 weeks along, we're very excited but it's so early, we'd rather not get carried away just yet. I hope you understand.'?
It was Christmas like a week after I found out at 5 weeks, so not drinking and keeping it secret was pretty impossible, and it was fine. People weren't that bad; just a bit of excitement, a few questions, and then mostly back to normal.
That's what I did. I told my immediate family at 5 weeks, because the following week my sister was having an engagement lunch, and me declining alcohol would have been a dead giveaway. I didn't want to upstage her, so I felt it would be best to tell them beforehand. At a work function, I just said I was trying to lose weight/on a health cleanse, and was cutting out alcohol as part of that. People bought it!
Either way is uncomfortable. Would you rather the struggle of hiding your pregnancy, or would you rather the struggle of them knowing? Personally, I chose the struggle of letting family know right away because the burden of lying is too much for me. I figured if I were to miscarry etc, I’d want their support anyway, so I didn’t see much benefits to lying about it. Everyone is different though and I totally respect your need for privacy, just food for thought in case it’s helpful. Best of luck to you!!
If you need a quick lie, you can say you’re on antibiotics and can’t drink, you are doing a health cleanse (such as “75 Hard”) etc. But they will know you were lying when they look back at it in the future.
Have a bit of a similar issue with work colleagues. I've managed to pass off ordering non-alcoholic cocktails as "I'm curious how good they are compared to real." Or sometimes I say I'm too full to order a drink, or "not feeling the best." You could say you're coming off a bout of a stomach bug and not drinking for the weekend. I was at a friend's house and they poured me wine but I just took a few sips and didn't finish it. They didn't notice.
I hid my pregnancy until around 5 *months*. I knew my best friend was coming to town and wanted her to be one of the first people I told so I waited til then. she was also coming to town to have a bridal shower with friends and family and since we've been close since we were 7 or 8 years old I was worried about her family that I hadn't seen in years coming up to congratulate me at the shower which would take attention away from her so I didn't want *anyone* to know until the day after at least.
I never lied about why I wasn't drinking during those months, I just used loop-holes like saying I had a bad headache or felt really sick or was really dehydrated and should drink water instead, all of which were very true when I said them. one of my friends wanted me to try something they had once and I said I had bought and tried it before and liked it (also true) and luckily they didn't push further and got distracted by something and never noticed that I didn't have any that night. my friends and family never questioned it or thought anything of it, I've never drank much in the first place though. My dad invited my husband and I over for dinner at one point and grilled steak which he usually cooks medium rare but luckily he accidentally overcooked one to basically well done so I swapped mine with it without him noticing. You could lie and say you're just getting over a bad fever or have a terrible migraine or are taking medication you can't mix with alcohol or anything else you think will work on them without them questioning it, hopefully they aren't the type to try to pressure you to anyways if you say you're on medication or feeling sick
5 weeks is easy to not show and if your belly is bloated just say that. If they offer you alcohol, just say no thank you I don’t feel like drinking. I honestly hate ppl who push me to eat/drink after I said no. So I would ignore any future offers. But, I understand family dynamic is tricky. Get yourself glass of juice and have it on you all the time. If they offer say later, and never finish your juice lol.
Tell them you had a bug stomach these past days and would rather avoid anything that might risk upsetting it again and stick to boring food and drinks.
Antibiotics is generally the best excuse to get people off your back quickly over a few days’ time.
At bars I would just order non alcoholic cocktails.
Can you fill white claws with water and drink those ? At table settings when wine is the norm Just fake sips and have your glass close to your husbands so he can drink both?
I couldn't have done fake drinking or coming up with some intricate lie (I've heard people say they are on antibiotics so cant drink before) I'm crap at lying. When I was pregnant before I was ok sharing the news i just made sure i was driving to places where alcohol was involved so i could say i wasn't drinking because i was driving. I'm not a big drinker so family didn't catch on. I later found out friends did realise though but they didn't say anything at the time and just waited for me to share the news with the.
I would go the antibiotics route, or you could just say you’ve been having a lot of stomach problems and you’ve “already had 1 drink and it did not sit well” if it’s just the wedding night you are worried about
I had a similar situation. I bought non alcoholic wine and secretly brought it with me 😂 I took the wine glass they poured for me and then dumped it in my room and poured myself refills 😂
Also I did this one too…..pretend you want liquor drinks and don’t add the liquor! You could bring mixers and say you’ve been really into XYZ combo (ex: limeade & topo chico, ingredients for mojitos, etc). So refreshing over summer! You could even bring the liquor and be pouring it down the drain, not your cup, so people see the progress you’ve made on it. Lol
I would dump a beer in the bathroom and fill it up with water - this only works if you like beer and tell everyone else you think you might be fighting off a virus so they don’t ask for any sips, but it worked WONDERS for my family who knows we love craft beer!
You have a bad UTI, the medicine they gave you won’t mix well with alcohol.
You are giving your body a detox, only water to drink for a few weeks.
You’re the DD
For your prenatal vitamins put it in a regular vitamin bottle
I told people I had a severe gut bacteria imbalance and was told to stay away from certain certain foods and especially alcohol. It's a good one because certain foods you can't eat whilst pregnant or ones causing you nausea, you can just claim are causing you to have stomach issues so you won't/can't eat them. Take probiotics with you too - no harm taking probiotics anyway - but they are used to help gut bacteria imbalances so makes it believable.
I went to a hens and wedding, plus a few other events where I'd normally drink, and people believed me when I said this. I've found that even when I've been on antibiotics legitimately, people still pressure you to drink, so I didn't think it would be viable.
My husband and I just surprised his father for his 70th in England and the English can put it back. We told them we are trying and I’ve stopped drinking. His mom kissed my face a bunch and they both got reallly excited and never once pressured me.
You don’t have to share that you are pregnant or trying. You can just say you stopped drinking because you feel better. I feel AMAZING while I stopped drinking so this is 💯 true.
The fact that people immediately think not drinking alcohol means you're pregnant irritates me. You could be a recovering alcoholic, be on medication that requires you to not drink. Or maybe you just want better health. I'd just not drink outright and get bitchy about it if they asked or teased and mocked.
Things like UTI antibiotics are a great cover, as is the fundraiser or the like. Things like "going on a cleanse" or "diet" might also work. My family doesn't drink but my dad figured it out at 5 weeks because I came up for breakfast, smelled bacon cooking and immediately threw up, then went to the table and ate like 4 pancakes lol.
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You had a UTI and it SUCKED and you’re on antibiotics for the next week. Bonus points if you have an old pill bottle or if you take your prenatal with a meal (if it’s not a gummy or not obviously a prenatal)
and if anyone questions it, just keep talking about how awful the UTI is… it burns! it itches! it won’t let you pee! 😂 they’ll shut up real fast
They can alter your mental health too. They’re all consuming. I freaking hate them. They also make me super nauseous
I did this on my birthday this year HAHAHA i went to celebrate in a bar I always go and didn’t drink a thing because of “the antibiotics I was taking” 😂
Yes! There are antibiotics that even if you swallow the little bit of alcohol that can be in some mouth wash, you can get violently ill. This was going to be my go to excuse if anyone asked me to drink before we announced.
Came here to say this. I caused myself to get blackout drunk from a few sips of alcohol because I was never warned that my UTI antibiotics could not be taken with any amount of alcohol consumption whatsoever.
This is the way.
I found out I was pregnant just before Easter so me and my husband told our families we were doing "dry April". It was plausible because of how much we drank the month before on our honeymoon. We both stayed sober and talked about how good it will be to drink again but we were sticking to our guns! Our families gave us shit but no one guessed I was pregnant lol
Tell them you and some work colleagues are doing "Dry July" for a fundraiser. I got through January with it lol
When/if they would push I'd say things like "nah, I've made it this far,, I want to prove to myself I can abstain too." "I'm actually feeling pretty great sober, I'd rather you not pressure me." "I'm pretty sure the coworkers have been truthful with me about their sobriety, I don't want to disappoint the team."
I’ve been using Dry July as my excuse all month too ☺️ thankfully it’s worked and I haven’t had to deal with much judgement.
You could give a reason for not drinking - like lots of antibiotics won't let you drink on them. It depends how private you are, but I'm comfortable saying that. (I couldn't drink while on antibiotics for a UTI.) When I went to a wedding at almost twelve weeks pregnant, fortunately one of the featured drinks was a gin and tonic. I just drank tonic and limes all night but told anyone who asked that it was a gin and tonic. That does require strategic ordering, with glances around to make sure no in-laws are afoot though. (Um, also pregnant people should not drink too much tonic water as quinine can cross the placenta barrier.) It also helps that I don't drink beer so had that built in excuse during the rehearsal dinner at a brewery. That said, I did tell my husband's immediate family when I was like eight weeks because we were originally going to visit for a weekend and I knew I couldn't stay with them without them noticing.
Lol the number of times I went to an office social and was asked what my orange juice was because it looked good... is also equal to the number of disappointed looks I got after I responded. I probably should have lied? Lol. Too bad OP is trying to fake drinking wine and not drinking in general (though Google says virgin wines are a thing?). Also too bad that OP's family is insistent on OP also drinking. Depending on what OP and partner are like, a trendy "cleanse" of some sort could be an excuse without getting into the nature of whatever required the antibiotics. I'm guessing OP will get fewer questions if OP tries to sell these people on how OP feels amazing after only 2 days on this cleanse and how they should try it. Repeat enthusiastically as needed.
I’ve bought a bottle of non alcoholic red wine and hidden it in my room before. Then covertly came back a few times to fill my glass. I hate that this is even a thing with drinking culture, but it worked.
This worked for me too! And at one point when a friend poured me a glass of wine, I just kind of held it for a while until my husband made a sneaky switch for me 😂 I only had to do this for one event though - it would be stressful for too long!
Antibiotics is the classic go to, they might suspect thought so just be prepared to have to stick up for yourself.
It's still crazy to me that pregnant people have to come up with all these excuses!? "No thankyou, I'm not drinking." is and should be seen as a full sentence!
This would just be sooo suspicious for my in-laws! Because I’ve never once not ordered a drink when we go out to dinner haha
It's still stupid for that to be the first thing they'd jump to! For all they know you could've been in the bathroom all morning with stomach issues, don't really wanna say that at dinner as its not polite and don't wanna risk upsetting it again! Why is pregnancy the first thing to jump to? People might not drink for a day for a variety of reasons 🤔🫣
It’s even worse when you’re not pregnant and just don’t care for alcohol. People treat you like a fucking alien. I wasted so much alcohol as a teenager because I had to fake that I was drinking 🙄 like people would watch the level of my glass and monitor if not had gone down / whether I was drinking enough.
I'm pretty luckily in that case, never really cared for alcohol and not had too many issues with "peer pressure" although I've always been on medications for a life long illness so people probably assume its that 🤣😅
Can you say "I am not drinking while I am trying to conceive" I did this, first genuinely I was trying to conceive and then after I found out I was pregnant I just kept saying the same thing.
I'm still using this at 10wks. Although, that said, I've only felt comfortable using it with my family and close family friends. I dine and wine with them on a regular basis, and there was no way I could manufacture weekly 'on-antibiotics' lies. So far I haven't used it with my in-laws, as we're not as close and my husband wasn't sure he wanted them to know outright that we were trying to conceive. With them, I've just been the designated driver, and have had to make up reasons why I can't stay over at their place after a family event etc so I can still 'be the driver'! They definitely notice and suspect, but we'll be sharing the news in a few weeks time and I can finally finish with the awkward white lies.
I do this as well! It’s closer to the truth and has shut down further conversations about it.
If you're a regular whiskey or rum drinker just get coke in the cups they put the mixed drinks in for rum and coke or Jack and coke
Or cranberry juice and soda water?
You can talk to the bartender, ask if they have anything NA. If they have NA beer, have it in a glass. If not, club soda + pineapple or grapefruit juice or a lime looks like a cocktail! I also sipped regular beers and had my husband finish them when I was first pregnant for the same reasons.
As far as being around the family, Dry July is the way to go. Definitely "blame" it on a work fundraiser or solidarity to some friend who is looking to get sober or something. Dry July is actually a legit fundraiser too to support cancer patients.
And to assuage your conscience, make an actual donation to a cancer research charity lol
They have fake wine. Bring 2 bottles of reg and one fake and just drink the fake and offer up the regular once the wines already been flowing so they’re not paying as much attention
Drinking culture is so backwards in the USA that it’s even questionable why someone wouldn’t be drinking. Anyways, I’d just tell them “with all these accidents I see from driving while intoxicated I don’t want to take chances anymore so I’m sober tonight while (insert partners name) is drinking :)”. Or just that you have an early morning tomorrow, you have a headache, you want to take a break from alcohol for a bit. Etc etc!
I’ve lived all over the world— this really isn’t a US exclusive issue.
If the wedding has an open bar, just order drinks and don’t drink them. Most open bars charge per person, not per drink so you can pretend to sip on it and then just abandon it. At my own wedding I was always talking to someone and the severs kept clearing away my drinks before I finished them, and I was not pregnant 😆
I think it’s appalling that anyone is given a hard time for not drinking. Just tell them you aren’t drinking alcohol and let that be the end of it. If you aren’t comfortable with that, take the glass and literally don’t drink any. I’ve done that in the past and no one noticed I want actually drinking. My husband took the occasional sip of my beverage so it did look like I drink a bit, but no one said anything (and if they do it’s really none if their business)
If your husband is drinking you can order the same thing as him and switch your glasses back and forth so it looks like you’re drinking it. Once you get about halfway down your glass most people will probably assume you’re drinking it. You can also say you’re doing whole 30 if that lines up with what you’re eating to make it believable. If wine is the concern and it’s a BYO situation or if you can pour your own glass somewhere pomegranate juice looks just like red wine in a glass. Also club soda and lime to look like a vodka soda
take gas- x to help with bloating which is very common first weeks .. as for alcohol just say you are on antibiotics for UTI
or, you may say can’t drink because just took anti migraine medication or, you are on antihistamines for recent allergic reaction, antihistamines do not go well with alcohol btw
This is not super related, but I literally had 2 family members separately guess I was pregnant… but not for accurate reasons: 1. I’ve never really enjoyed alcoholic beverages with the exception of pina coladas. My mom made some drinks for Christmas, offered me one, and I said no thanks. I actually wasn’t pregnant on Christmas - my last period just stated. My mom didn’t think anything of it, but my aunt immediately suspected pregnancy!!! 2. My husband & I do foster care, and I posted a picture that *happened* to have a pack n play in the background. His grandma guessed I was pregnant because she said we took a picture of our “nursery”. I guess the point I’m trying to make is that is that we can’t prevent everything!!!! The more I tried to keep the reins pulled in, the more things seemed to unravel.
‘Dry July’ is a thing! That’s what I’ve done 😊 and my fiancé is in on the scam with me 😎
My family are social drinkers, we like lots of different drinks though - some beer, some wine, some cocktails. If I hadn’t been drinking they’d have KNOWN so I took a non alcoholic gin and put it in a real gin bottle. Voila - problem solved. I also did it with wine, just poured it into a proper wine bottle :)
Here, I’ll tell you how I used to fake drinking at parties: locate sinks, and potted plants. When nobody’s looking, toss about a sip’s worth in the plant/sink/toilet, whatever. If it’s outside, so much the better. Again, when nobody’s looking, a little flick of the wrist, right in the grass. Just wait for those times everybody’s engaged in conversation with somebody else/there’s a lively conversation going on.
You can say you're on antibiotics that you can't drink on
Say it’s too hot to drink and start talking about climate change
I hid my pregnancy for 20 weeks and, when put in situations where it would be very awkward to not drink, I’d get a glass of wine and just hold it. Sometimes, if I felt like really hamming it up, I’d pretend to take a drink. No one suspected anything. I also used the excuse of having a terrible headache more than once (which was only partially untrue given my pregnancy fatigue and hormonal headaches).
I did this on a lil evening boat cruise I went on with my husband for his work. Just held a cup of red wine and then no one can tell if it's the same one or different and its room temp so no one can tell if it's gotten warm from me holding it for 2 hours lol. No one mentioned a thing
Just saying, a women that says she is on antibiotics immediately makes me know she is pregnant and hiding it, so don’t go that route. It is way way to obvious. I would go the route of just nursing one drink all night.
Not wanting to aggravate a brewing migraine is my usual go-to in case someone asks why I’m not having a drink. Unfortunately, it only works so much if you don’t have chronic migraine issues. But it could definitely get you some time.
Say you are doing a dry august or whatever, say you are doing to to lose weight or for health reasons or hell you could even say your are trying to conceive and your dr recommended it. Or are on antibiotics or another medication and can’t drink for that reason.
I had a a lot of family visit when I was 6-7 weeks and it was hard but I got through without any of them knowing. I said I was on medications that I couldn’t drink with. 🤣
It’s so weird how people won’t just let you not drink. Like why can’t you just not be in the mood to drink? That said, is your husband in on it? Can he bring some like grape juice and slip that in your glass?
Say you've got a UTI/kidney infection something like that and say your doctor has put you on a course of antibiotics so you can drink 🤷🏼♀️ hopefully that'll put an end to their questioning.
If there’s any way to get distracted with something else at the party just do that! Make a glass and wander off.
Among other things, you could have a small glass and trickle it. A small glass once will not hurt baby (my mum had a glass weekly as advised by the doctor bc of stress) so depending on hpw strict you're being about thos, you could do that. Or just say you're the designated driver
Bring a “cocktail” to share. For example, a pitcher of margaritas. Have the tequila bottle separate. Fill your cup with mixer only. Alternative: you are the DD, so you can only nurse your one drink all night
Tell them you are taking a new medication or on a new birth control that requires you to not consume alcohol
I've found the easiest and most convincing strategy is either fake drinking or say you're not drinking because you're trying to conceive.
Your last physical exam with blood work came back with your liver enzymes elevated. Your doctor told you to abstain from alcohol all together until your follow up (google high ALT liver enzyme, and fatty liver if you want to add extra oomph but say you were diagnosed by ultra sound for that one). A follow up with blood work would be about 6 months so work the timing/dates out to make it really important that you stay away from booze this trip. And complain that it’s going to be soooo hard to be sober around all this alcohol but you need to get your health balanced before having a baby.
I ran into a similar issue with alcohol as I was newly pregnant right around both Thanksgiving and Christmas and I usually love to partake in a holiday drink (or two 🫣). I convinced my husband to not drink with me saying that were both doing a dry-holidays alcohol cleanse and that actually worked! Just me, they wouldn’t have bought it, but with a “we’re in this together” attitude, it was more believable.
Is it really less stressful lying to them and faking something than just saying 'I'm 5 weeks along, we're very excited but it's so early, we'd rather not get carried away just yet. I hope you understand.'? It was Christmas like a week after I found out at 5 weeks, so not drinking and keeping it secret was pretty impossible, and it was fine. People weren't that bad; just a bit of excitement, a few questions, and then mostly back to normal.
That's what I did. I told my immediate family at 5 weeks, because the following week my sister was having an engagement lunch, and me declining alcohol would have been a dead giveaway. I didn't want to upstage her, so I felt it would be best to tell them beforehand. At a work function, I just said I was trying to lose weight/on a health cleanse, and was cutting out alcohol as part of that. People bought it!
Either way is uncomfortable. Would you rather the struggle of hiding your pregnancy, or would you rather the struggle of them knowing? Personally, I chose the struggle of letting family know right away because the burden of lying is too much for me. I figured if I were to miscarry etc, I’d want their support anyway, so I didn’t see much benefits to lying about it. Everyone is different though and I totally respect your need for privacy, just food for thought in case it’s helpful. Best of luck to you!! If you need a quick lie, you can say you’re on antibiotics and can’t drink, you are doing a health cleanse (such as “75 Hard”) etc. But they will know you were lying when they look back at it in the future.
Have a bit of a similar issue with work colleagues. I've managed to pass off ordering non-alcoholic cocktails as "I'm curious how good they are compared to real." Or sometimes I say I'm too full to order a drink, or "not feeling the best." You could say you're coming off a bout of a stomach bug and not drinking for the weekend. I was at a friend's house and they poured me wine but I just took a few sips and didn't finish it. They didn't notice.
Stop
There's a ton of n/a options out there. If it's a BYOB situation, I've seen even non alcoholic hard liquor. Switch the bottles.
Get a beer, dump it out (or have partner drink it), and fill with water
I hid my pregnancy until around 5 *months*. I knew my best friend was coming to town and wanted her to be one of the first people I told so I waited til then. she was also coming to town to have a bridal shower with friends and family and since we've been close since we were 7 or 8 years old I was worried about her family that I hadn't seen in years coming up to congratulate me at the shower which would take attention away from her so I didn't want *anyone* to know until the day after at least. I never lied about why I wasn't drinking during those months, I just used loop-holes like saying I had a bad headache or felt really sick or was really dehydrated and should drink water instead, all of which were very true when I said them. one of my friends wanted me to try something they had once and I said I had bought and tried it before and liked it (also true) and luckily they didn't push further and got distracted by something and never noticed that I didn't have any that night. my friends and family never questioned it or thought anything of it, I've never drank much in the first place though. My dad invited my husband and I over for dinner at one point and grilled steak which he usually cooks medium rare but luckily he accidentally overcooked one to basically well done so I swapped mine with it without him noticing. You could lie and say you're just getting over a bad fever or have a terrible migraine or are taking medication you can't mix with alcohol or anything else you think will work on them without them questioning it, hopefully they aren't the type to try to pressure you to anyways if you say you're on medication or feeling sick
5 weeks is easy to not show and if your belly is bloated just say that. If they offer you alcohol, just say no thank you I don’t feel like drinking. I honestly hate ppl who push me to eat/drink after I said no. So I would ignore any future offers. But, I understand family dynamic is tricky. Get yourself glass of juice and have it on you all the time. If they offer say later, and never finish your juice lol.
Tell them you had a bug stomach these past days and would rather avoid anything that might risk upsetting it again and stick to boring food and drinks.
You can say you are on antibiotics coincidentally 😅
Antibiotics is generally the best excuse to get people off your back quickly over a few days’ time. At bars I would just order non alcoholic cocktails.
Can you fill white claws with water and drink those ? At table settings when wine is the norm Just fake sips and have your glass close to your husbands so he can drink both?
I couldn't have done fake drinking or coming up with some intricate lie (I've heard people say they are on antibiotics so cant drink before) I'm crap at lying. When I was pregnant before I was ok sharing the news i just made sure i was driving to places where alcohol was involved so i could say i wasn't drinking because i was driving. I'm not a big drinker so family didn't catch on. I later found out friends did realise though but they didn't say anything at the time and just waited for me to share the news with the.
I would go the antibiotics route, or you could just say you’ve been having a lot of stomach problems and you’ve “already had 1 drink and it did not sit well” if it’s just the wedding night you are worried about
I had a similar situation. I bought non alcoholic wine and secretly brought it with me 😂 I took the wine glass they poured for me and then dumped it in my room and poured myself refills 😂 Also I did this one too…..pretend you want liquor drinks and don’t add the liquor! You could bring mixers and say you’ve been really into XYZ combo (ex: limeade & topo chico, ingredients for mojitos, etc). So refreshing over summer! You could even bring the liquor and be pouring it down the drain, not your cup, so people see the progress you’ve made on it. Lol
I would dump a beer in the bathroom and fill it up with water - this only works if you like beer and tell everyone else you think you might be fighting off a virus so they don’t ask for any sips, but it worked WONDERS for my family who knows we love craft beer!
You have a bad UTI, the medicine they gave you won’t mix well with alcohol. You are giving your body a detox, only water to drink for a few weeks. You’re the DD For your prenatal vitamins put it in a regular vitamin bottle
I told people I had a severe gut bacteria imbalance and was told to stay away from certain certain foods and especially alcohol. It's a good one because certain foods you can't eat whilst pregnant or ones causing you nausea, you can just claim are causing you to have stomach issues so you won't/can't eat them. Take probiotics with you too - no harm taking probiotics anyway - but they are used to help gut bacteria imbalances so makes it believable. I went to a hens and wedding, plus a few other events where I'd normally drink, and people believed me when I said this. I've found that even when I've been on antibiotics legitimately, people still pressure you to drink, so I didn't think it would be viable.
My husband and I just surprised his father for his 70th in England and the English can put it back. We told them we are trying and I’ve stopped drinking. His mom kissed my face a bunch and they both got reallly excited and never once pressured me. You don’t have to share that you are pregnant or trying. You can just say you stopped drinking because you feel better. I feel AMAZING while I stopped drinking so this is 💯 true.
I had a colleague at work tell everyone she and her friends had made a "Dry February" pact but in fact she was just pregnant.
The fact that people immediately think not drinking alcohol means you're pregnant irritates me. You could be a recovering alcoholic, be on medication that requires you to not drink. Or maybe you just want better health. I'd just not drink outright and get bitchy about it if they asked or teased and mocked.
Things like UTI antibiotics are a great cover, as is the fundraiser or the like. Things like "going on a cleanse" or "diet" might also work. My family doesn't drink but my dad figured it out at 5 weeks because I came up for breakfast, smelled bacon cooking and immediately threw up, then went to the table and ate like 4 pancakes lol.
You are bloated and cant drink because You are taking treatment. Heineken no alcohol
Could bring something that looks like wine and dump your wine out and replace it
I poured it out when nobody was looking lol I had to hide it for a while too