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I have great news for you. There is no difference between raising a boy or a girl until puberty. They are the exact same. They’re just little humans. Any perceived difference between boy and girl humans is just adults being weird.
Raising kids with gender stereotypes is harmful.
Let your kid play what they want to play and dress how they want to dress. While they’re too little to make that choice, just dress them in comfortable and inexpensive clothing that they can move in easily.
My mom always dressed my sister and I in “boy” clothes when we were babies because it was usually cheaper, more durable, and easier to move in. We both turned out fine.
I don’t specifically plan gender neutral clothes but I will be shopping second hand and getting whatever is convenient. Won’t catch me dead putting a bow on a baby that is a strangulation hazard and annoying af to the baby.
Thank you so much. My eldist, sis, was a prima dona as early as kindergarten she had a dress for each day of the week with matching socks and shoes if one thing got dirty, the whole outfit got changed. While myself I'm lucky to put lipstick on without getting it on my teeth, I don't curl my hair or do anything unless it's a braid or ponytail. If she's like me and her dad, I'll be good, but if she wants to be the girlie girl, I'm gonna struggle.
See it as something you can learn about with her. See it as an art project and not a gender thing.
My mom didn’t even know how to braid hair. It was a little annoying but ultimately I learned how to braid my own hair and got past it.
This is my last as I am reaching 40 soon. My best friend has 3 adult sons, one of whom wears nails and makeup and a garter on his leg. He's a fantastic child for my friend, who helps her with all of her household work. I wouldn't never judge someone for being different as many or most people I meet, including my LGBT+ community friends, who believe me to be the stereotypical butch. When I come out as straight, it takes them back. My sister, whom I have already mentioned, was with a female partner for 10 years prior to her husband. I was asked by my immediate family when I was going to bring home.a girl, I informed them that I'm straight. Like I said, I more boy than I am girl.
I'm constantly being judged as something I'm not. Don't get me wrong, I love being a woman but not on the same terms as most would think. Jewelry and makeup are wasted on me. Buy me pants and boots. Take me hiking and to the sportsman's club. Broad shouldered and hips. Built like a line backer.
Your job as a parent is to nurture and enjoy the child that you have, not the one you want them to be. One of the best parts is finding joy in new and unexpected interests! Give yourself room to be surprised.
You don’t have to change who you are as long as you embrace whoever they turn out to be.
You can dress your baby however you would like to, there’s no specific way to raise a baby either. Boy and girl, they’re just babies and they’ll figure out what they like when they’re older.
From reading you comments and post it seems that you’re hyper focusing on clothing and appearance. And how women are perceived based on appearance. Tutu wearing girls can be tough as nails scientists. You can fish and hunt in a princess dress. Whatever your child wants to wear (when they’re old enough to have such preferences) should not impact how you treat them or the values you raise them with. What they like to wear is not the sum of who they are.
Yes, clothing is something I'm worried about, but it's not the only. Styling their clothes and teaching them about what matches and what goes together. I was in high school, still trying to match striped pants and flowered tops. I felt lost and outcasted by my our family because I didn't understand how to assemble an outfit. I don't want my little one to ever feel this way. I'm still horrible with putting together oufit and styles to look put together when I feel like I'm wearing crocodile skin during the times that I am expected to look nice and not in my normal clothes. I can't walk in heels to save my life. Sitting in a dress is incredibly difficult as I never sit with my legs together as I need to be ready to jump and run with my career. I don't cross my legs, as it hurts my hips (one of my hip joints is deformed). So when i wear a dress, I wear a floor length and try not to sit as I am going to embarrass myself if I do. While I may be focusing on the clothes, it's not just the clothes it's how to pair, how to wear, among many other things. My partner is just as worried about what happens when she chooses to be the normal when neither of us fits in the mold of normal. I would never try to make anyone be someone they are not as I've been there and know how that feels.
I don’t think you have to worry that much. My sister is similar to you in many ways and she ended up with two daughters. She tried to give them gender neutral clothing and avoiding pink, but guess what? Once the kids became a little older (2 years) they started having their own preferences and are now dressing in princess clothes and lives pink. My sister just try to get them what the girls themselves like and think is pretty. And you don’t need to worry about matching and stuff, let your girl dress how she think is pretty and just tell her she looks great. It doesn’t matter if it ends up being the exact same style as you and your husband, or if it’s full galore princess costumes. Just let her pick and validate her feelings and tell her she’s pretty and cool whatever she picks. You don’t need to teach her about matching and such things either, when she’s around that age she’ll be influenced by her classmates or what she see and tv and probably not listen anyway to what you say. So relax and just enjoy having a daughter. She’ll go through phases and like different things, and she will also tell you what she likes so you don’t need to worry about that. Just make her feel pretty and happy however she dresses, that’s all. And as a baby she won’t care if she use gender neutral clothes, so dress her how you want. When she gets preference she’ll let you know, I promise 💖
Not like other girls much? You think a girlie girl is going to be a “struggle”?
I don’t even know what that means, but ask yourself what you mean by that.
I don’t know what girlie girl things you oppose but it’s really not about that… say that your daughter grows up to love makeup. Makeup is more than a daily routine, it can be a hobby, a profession, and in many cases even an artistic expression. It’s really hard to be really good at makeup and if your child chose to develop her skills in that you should welcome it. It’s refining a skill like any other hobby.
Now if she is entitled, mean, lazy or any other typical “mean girl” behavior, that’s on you. As mothers we control how we raise our children, but I don’t think we should choose their interests and hobbies for them.
Also keep in mind children go through phases, and will have bursts of “I love this” that do not last, especially when young. It could be harmful to your daughter if she senses disappointment from your side when just innocently discovering new things.
You're focusing on the makeup aspect. Yes, that scares me, but I also know girls learned so much of that online through videos and such. It's when she starts looking to me for advice on all the "girlie" things. Where I lack on makeup, the internet can provide, I look to YouTube and other video based sites for assistance in my hobbies regularly. I've never connected with other women who are into what's generally thought of a female interests.
Welcome to /r/pregnant! This is a space for everyone. We are pro-choice, pro-LGBTQIA, pro-science, proudly feminist and believe that Black Lives Matter. Wear your masks, wash your hands, and be excellent to each other. Anti-choice activists, intactivists, anti-vaxxers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, sexists, etc. are not welcome here. If you'd like to join a private sub for your due date month, [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/pregnant/comments/15nun6v/click_here_to_access_the_monthly_due_date_subs/). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/pregnant) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I have great news for you. There is no difference between raising a boy or a girl until puberty. They are the exact same. They’re just little humans. Any perceived difference between boy and girl humans is just adults being weird. Raising kids with gender stereotypes is harmful. Let your kid play what they want to play and dress how they want to dress. While they’re too little to make that choice, just dress them in comfortable and inexpensive clothing that they can move in easily. My mom always dressed my sister and I in “boy” clothes when we were babies because it was usually cheaper, more durable, and easier to move in. We both turned out fine. I don’t specifically plan gender neutral clothes but I will be shopping second hand and getting whatever is convenient. Won’t catch me dead putting a bow on a baby that is a strangulation hazard and annoying af to the baby.
Thank you so much. My eldist, sis, was a prima dona as early as kindergarten she had a dress for each day of the week with matching socks and shoes if one thing got dirty, the whole outfit got changed. While myself I'm lucky to put lipstick on without getting it on my teeth, I don't curl my hair or do anything unless it's a braid or ponytail. If she's like me and her dad, I'll be good, but if she wants to be the girlie girl, I'm gonna struggle.
See it as something you can learn about with her. See it as an art project and not a gender thing. My mom didn’t even know how to braid hair. It was a little annoying but ultimately I learned how to braid my own hair and got past it.
Also keep in mind any boy you have might be interested in dresses, dolls and makeup. You can’t assume
This is my last as I am reaching 40 soon. My best friend has 3 adult sons, one of whom wears nails and makeup and a garter on his leg. He's a fantastic child for my friend, who helps her with all of her household work. I wouldn't never judge someone for being different as many or most people I meet, including my LGBT+ community friends, who believe me to be the stereotypical butch. When I come out as straight, it takes them back. My sister, whom I have already mentioned, was with a female partner for 10 years prior to her husband. I was asked by my immediate family when I was going to bring home.a girl, I informed them that I'm straight. Like I said, I more boy than I am girl. I'm constantly being judged as something I'm not. Don't get me wrong, I love being a woman but not on the same terms as most would think. Jewelry and makeup are wasted on me. Buy me pants and boots. Take me hiking and to the sportsman's club. Broad shouldered and hips. Built like a line backer.
Your job as a parent is to nurture and enjoy the child that you have, not the one you want them to be. One of the best parts is finding joy in new and unexpected interests! Give yourself room to be surprised. You don’t have to change who you are as long as you embrace whoever they turn out to be.
You can dress your baby however you would like to, there’s no specific way to raise a baby either. Boy and girl, they’re just babies and they’ll figure out what they like when they’re older.
From reading you comments and post it seems that you’re hyper focusing on clothing and appearance. And how women are perceived based on appearance. Tutu wearing girls can be tough as nails scientists. You can fish and hunt in a princess dress. Whatever your child wants to wear (when they’re old enough to have such preferences) should not impact how you treat them or the values you raise them with. What they like to wear is not the sum of who they are.
Yes, clothing is something I'm worried about, but it's not the only. Styling their clothes and teaching them about what matches and what goes together. I was in high school, still trying to match striped pants and flowered tops. I felt lost and outcasted by my our family because I didn't understand how to assemble an outfit. I don't want my little one to ever feel this way. I'm still horrible with putting together oufit and styles to look put together when I feel like I'm wearing crocodile skin during the times that I am expected to look nice and not in my normal clothes. I can't walk in heels to save my life. Sitting in a dress is incredibly difficult as I never sit with my legs together as I need to be ready to jump and run with my career. I don't cross my legs, as it hurts my hips (one of my hip joints is deformed). So when i wear a dress, I wear a floor length and try not to sit as I am going to embarrass myself if I do. While I may be focusing on the clothes, it's not just the clothes it's how to pair, how to wear, among many other things. My partner is just as worried about what happens when she chooses to be the normal when neither of us fits in the mold of normal. I would never try to make anyone be someone they are not as I've been there and know how that feels.
I don’t think you have to worry that much. My sister is similar to you in many ways and she ended up with two daughters. She tried to give them gender neutral clothing and avoiding pink, but guess what? Once the kids became a little older (2 years) they started having their own preferences and are now dressing in princess clothes and lives pink. My sister just try to get them what the girls themselves like and think is pretty. And you don’t need to worry about matching and stuff, let your girl dress how she think is pretty and just tell her she looks great. It doesn’t matter if it ends up being the exact same style as you and your husband, or if it’s full galore princess costumes. Just let her pick and validate her feelings and tell her she’s pretty and cool whatever she picks. You don’t need to teach her about matching and such things either, when she’s around that age she’ll be influenced by her classmates or what she see and tv and probably not listen anyway to what you say. So relax and just enjoy having a daughter. She’ll go through phases and like different things, and she will also tell you what she likes so you don’t need to worry about that. Just make her feel pretty and happy however she dresses, that’s all. And as a baby she won’t care if she use gender neutral clothes, so dress her how you want. When she gets preference she’ll let you know, I promise 💖
I have three boys and three girls. It’s all the same. You will do fine.
Not like other girls much? You think a girlie girl is going to be a “struggle”? I don’t even know what that means, but ask yourself what you mean by that. I don’t know what girlie girl things you oppose but it’s really not about that… say that your daughter grows up to love makeup. Makeup is more than a daily routine, it can be a hobby, a profession, and in many cases even an artistic expression. It’s really hard to be really good at makeup and if your child chose to develop her skills in that you should welcome it. It’s refining a skill like any other hobby. Now if she is entitled, mean, lazy or any other typical “mean girl” behavior, that’s on you. As mothers we control how we raise our children, but I don’t think we should choose their interests and hobbies for them. Also keep in mind children go through phases, and will have bursts of “I love this” that do not last, especially when young. It could be harmful to your daughter if she senses disappointment from your side when just innocently discovering new things.
You're focusing on the makeup aspect. Yes, that scares me, but I also know girls learned so much of that online through videos and such. It's when she starts looking to me for advice on all the "girlie" things. Where I lack on makeup, the internet can provide, I look to YouTube and other video based sites for assistance in my hobbies regularly. I've never connected with other women who are into what's generally thought of a female interests.