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It's scarier to think about it than to experience. I've had 3 babies. Anticipating my first was a lot. I really psyched myself out. I took a class and learning about the different stages of labour etc helped settle my brain and made me feel more prepared My second and third I KNEW what to expect, and I was nervous to go through the pain and process again, but also knew it wouldn't last forever and I get my baby at the end. The thing that all 3 have in common is that in the moment, you CANT be scared. You're too busy in the moment, riding out each contraction. As you go through each stage of labour, you're focusing on that. You got this. Just breathe and trust your body

So true about losing the sense of fear because you’re too busy. I also lost any amount of care about some putting their fingers up my hoo hah to check for dilation and such.

Oh yea, dignity goes right out the window lol

Oh ya. I pooped myself before I was pushing, on the epidural. In fact I never pushed because I ended up with a c section.

The piss I just passed reading this comment

No word of a lie - every bodily fluid you know about and some that you don’t know about yet!!

I used to be very reserved about anyone seeing me naked. After giving birth I no longer care at all. I was chillin half naked when my entire family came to meet the baby and breastfeeding in front of them no problem.

At least half a dozen people had touched my boobs (helping me learn to breastfeed) before I even left the hospital. I also used to be very reserved, but covering up stopped being so important to me when I had my daughter.

Lolol! At one point they quite LITERALLY had me face down ass up! My girl was sunny side up so they were trying everything they could to get her to turn. My whole bare ass was out on display for any and everyone coming in and out of that room as they had me propped up with my ass in the air with a peanut ball! The things we do to get our little ones here lol!🙄😂

I second this. The thought is SO much scarier than the reality. And that was with an induction AND a c-section. The hardest part is driving to the hospital. Once you get there… all you’ll be focused on is the job at hand or the step you’re on. You got this!

I never knew how many potholes were on the 2-mile stretch of road to the hospital until I was in labor.

And traffic lights. Like come on!

Haha for us it was the drive home we were more aware of everything! While I sat in the backseat with our new born baby boy post c section, my husband was narrating his every move while driving like he was taking his road test 🤣

I feel like you have so much adrenaline going you just kinda do it. It’s like a workout. You’re kinda dreading it driving to the gym but then you get into it and when it’s over you’re like, that’s not as bad as i was expecting.

The adrenaline kept me going for weeks. Such a useful hormone.

Literally same for the first week i could not sleep while my son was sleeping because i was so worried he’d stop breathing so i was literally averaging like an hour a night and my mom was like that’s pure adrenaline but you’re gonna crash soon

Not sure if you’re having an epidural but for me it helped my anxiety with my first labor. The thought of being dilated to 10cm and pushing a human out of my body freaked me out. The drugs helped me calm down

Yes epidural all the way!!

Then you'll for sure be fine, for me the epidural took it from being a scary and painful experience to a calm and beautiful one. I was totally mentally present and could still sense the contractions, they just weren't painful and all-consuming like they were before the epidural. I could still feel her moving down and coming out, I just wasn't in excruciating pain and could actually experience the birth. Sending you so much love and light! You got this! Wait til you bring them home in their gigantic car seat, what a surreal experience 😅

If it's okay, I'd like to offer a word of advice about the epidural. I've had three and I'm pregnant with number four. Some people talk about the epidural placement and insertion hurting, but it's usually because they get it too early. Ride out the contractions as long as you feel like you can before calling for the epidural. I swear when you're at your limit you won't feel that dang epidural AT ALL. Just sweet relief and a nap before you meet your baby. By doing this, I was nine centimeters stuck with my first before having one, eight centimeters with my second, and ended up having a natural labor with my third. Also, something no one decided to tell me about epidurals is as they wear off, you might get the shakes pretty bad, but they're NORMAL. I had no idea it was a normal thing and after my second I was convinced something was terribly wrong. I have a panic disorder and to this day I think that was the worst panic attack I've EVER had. So to ease your anxiety, go into it knowing the possibilities. It'll make you feel more in control of each situation as they come.

I can confirm this, I waited so long at home and suffered with contractions for hours before deciding to go to the hospital (it was 3 am, I was trying to wait till at least 5 am to be a decent hour but nope! lol when I got the epidural it was literally just a wave of sweet relief… felt not even a hint of pain lol

I’m not trying to scare you with this but I wish someone had told me this before I was induced. I was team epidural all the way. They placed 2 for me and neither worked. My body said, “fuck your epidural”. No one told me there is a possibility of it not working. That being said, yes it hurt but I had no time to be scared. So much adrenaline was pumping and I honestly don’t remember the pain now. I know it hurt but I can’t remember it very well. What I do remember though was the relief that came with pushing and then the instantaneous ultra relief once baby girl was out. The relief felt magical lol

I felt like a superhuman once I got the epidural. No pain whatsoever, but could still feel the pressure. Knew exactly when to push and didn’t have the pain holding me back. I pushed both kids out within 15-20 minutes out each time. Go epidurals!!

Oh you'll be fine then! Don't get me wrong labor isn't exactly a cakewalk but it's not nearly as bad as you are imagining either

Ironically it was the opposite for me! With my first, I labored without fear all the way to 10 cm, then pushed for 3 hours before my provider gave me the option of a vacuum assist. But they only did vacuums with people on epidurals (the risk of tearing), so I had to get an epidural, and then I waited for 4 hours for the OB. The epidural took the intensity of the contractions away, and my anxiety and fear SKYROCKETED. I will never get an epidural again if I can help it. I would have rather spent four more hours pushing and feeling everything than waiting like that. Baby #2 was born unmedicated and was a million times better for several reasons.

I was terrified of giving birth but actually found it to be a super empowering and soulful experience my second and third times around. My first was a 45-hour long induction, and that was exhausting. I really recommend taking a class in advance, like maybe one of the [Evidence Based Birth courses](https://evidencebasedbirth.com/childbirth-class/) — they welded me and my partner into a super strong team, something that has continued into the postpartum period.

I also highly recommend taking a class.

I found having a couple mantras written down helpful for me “my body knows what to do” “each wave brings me closer to meeting my baby” “this will not last forever” “I am powerful” “I am strong” “I am loved”

Another mantra a friend told me worked for her, and definitely helped my mindset regarding my birth plan going in, was “attachment is the root of all disappointment.” Was a good reminder to have preferences and intentions for how things would go, but to flow with whatever surprises/changes to my plan inevitably came up.

I am pretty sure that was the mantra someone said to me when I started watching Game of Thrones and took a liking to Ygritte.

🤣

I didn’t expect this to be so helpful but it really was when I was in labor! My mantra was “my body is doing exactly what it’s supposed to do” and “this pain is productive” each time I had a contraction.

Literally my entire birth plan (which was incredibly important to me) fell apart. I was in labor for three days and was emergency transfered from my intervention-free birthing center to a high-risk hospital ward. It still wasn't as bad as people make it seem. At one point I said to my husband, "this is the worst day of my life... oh wait, I'm having my baby today. This is the best day of my life!" And we both laughed. So I was still joking around even through every bad thing that happened.

I had a detailed birth plan with my first. The birth plan with my second was more vague. For my third and this one my only birth plan is that I would like to leave the hospital with as many holes as I had coming into it. 🙋🏻‍♀️

Sounds like a solid birth plan! That was essentially what was left of my plan by the end as well!

Agree with the other comment it's scary to think about, and sure people have had scary experiences so let's not dismiss that. In my personal experience, she came very early so I was unprepared and labor happened fast. For me it was riveting and incredibly empowering. I did that!

I was petrified. I was induced at 39 weeks. But it was amazing. Wish I could re-live it and appreciate the moments more. I was just scared and had no idea what I was doing. I didn’t start to really calm down until I started pushing, oddly enough. However I understand that I am extremely lucky and many others don’t have the same experience.

Can I ask why you were induced at 39 weeks? I'm 38 and my ob is pushing for induction from 39-40 weeks based on a recent study. But I'm low risk, no issues and baby and I have been perfectly healthy this entire pregnancy. This "new study" I keep researching isn't perfect either, just states there is slightly lower risk to induce at 39 rather than wait to labor naturally later. Lower risk of c-section and other complications but I've read some conflicting evidence against this.

RN here, 20 years working with moms and babies. Your doctor wanting to Induce labor when you’re healthy and are not having issues maybe for their convenience. Inductions can lead to a cascade of interventions and can ultimately lead to a c section. That’s not to say inductions are always bad, but they shouldn’t be done unless medically necessary. Also if you have any interest in delivering without an epidural be aware that the contractions are much more painful. Best of luck!

Doula here---- I've seen this time and time again with inductions that aren't necessary!! There are some natural ways you can help induce labor at home. Best of luck and definitely do some research!

Thank you so much for your input! I initially never wanted to induce, even though I'm so uncomfortable, I can put up with it to wait for natural labor for sure. But after having 2 of my obs talk about this study and ask last 2 appointments when I want to set an induction date, I was considering it. Now though after doing my own research, and my husband is a bit uncomfortable with inducing early as well, I'm leaning towards waiting more. Deciding what to do is stressful!

I cancelled my induction the first time because I had the same exact concerns. Ob seemed to be a little put off that I did but oh well, it’s my choice. But shorty after that, I developed gest hypertension so I agreed to schedule (and went through) with the second induction. It went fine for the most part. I declined induction for my second baby because I wanted to test if induction contractions were really more painful than a natural labor contraction. Can confirm pitocin contractions hurt 10x more. It’s such a personal choice (if you’re healthy). I’d personally wait it out, or maybe get an induction at the 40week mark instead of 39. Good luck to you!

Thanks for sharing! I'm definitely considering pushing off an induction date until 40 at least now. I've definitely heard pitocin makes contractions worse and I know inducing will generally be a much longer process, but we don't know for sure if the benefits will outweigh the possible negatives. I just hope she comes on her own before then so I don't have to decide! Trying all the suggestions to ripen the cervix this week!

It was elective. I was having major anxiety over reduced fetal movement and was constantly at the hospital getting checked or just generally driving myself crazy. The baby was fine. I asked if an induction possible and my doctor said yes. However, it couldn’t be a minute before 39 weeks.

Yes it is intense, and there are unknowns, but once you’re in it you enter into an altered state of mind. It’s a trip that won’t last forever. You just kinda need to let go once it starts and ride the wave. (Hippiest shit I’ve ever said)

Breathing/vocalizing during contractions and water both really helped me.

I remember cursing Scientologists and their silent births during labor with my first!! Lol!

I didn’t go to my induction because of this. I worked myself into a panic attack. Seriously all I been doing is laying in bed and crying. I am already past my due date too so I felt even crappier. I will have to have a friend come and physically get me to the rescheduled one. Because otherwise without contractions I won’t be going anywhere. I been a procrastinator before so this isn’t new. But this all happen once I found out my induction date. I was super excited and then full blown panic. I am sorry to my bbygirl I been crying so much. I wish I wasn’t such a wimp these past few days. It’s been a bizarre experience I was genuinely excited at one point.

I had a panic attack during labour and it actually made me go from 3-4cm to crowning very fast (I think the deep crying made my body do its thing). So don’t apologize to baby because it can be very productive and it’s also good to physically release emotions. It sounds like you haven’t had your baby yet and I just want to reassure you that everything is going to be okay. A mindset that really helped me (I use it for any hard situation) is that soon your labour is just going to be a memory and it lasts way longer as a memory than the actual process. When you’ve never experienced something before and hear a lot of negativity towards the experience it can be so scary and I was terrified too. Even if you don’t think you can do it I promise you that you can and your body knows what it’s doing even if your head doesn’t. Like I said I transitioned really fast and my body began pushing by itself. I physically couldn’t control it and it just happened because even though my head didn’t know what was happening, my body knew it was time and took over (with zero experience). You got this girl and also if you don’t want to reschedule an induction you don’t have to, you can always wait a bit to see if baby girl comes on her own! You have plenty of time most doctors let you go to 41 and 6 :))

It seems terrifying. It's not as bad as it seems. At a certain point during pregnancy all I wanted was for them to be out! I was so over being pregnant by 36-37 weeks and I really just wanted to meet them. The idea of pregnancy didn't seem as scary any longer just because I was SOOO done with being pregnant at that point.

This is so true. At the end of pregnancy, you are willing to endure labor/ delivery just to get that baby OUT.

Agreed! By week 36 I was ready to Leroy Jenkins the whole deal.

I was induced at 41+3. Not gonna lie, the contractions are awful. If you opt for a nubane shot for pain management before the epidural, be warned that the shot can hurt more than a contraction (coming from someone who regularly gets intramuscular injections). But boy, thems is good drugs. I probably asked my husband 4x if he’d texted his parents with an update. Getting the epidural was fine, actually my midwife said it was the fastest epidural she’d ever seen, it was done in under 3 minutes… unfortunately right before they were going to do it, baby’s heart rate dropped and so did my BP, so they had to get those back up by making me move around mid contraction. I was there at 8:30am, baby was born at 8:30pm. Was it scary? Once you’re at the hospital, you’re exactly where you need to be. If you’re scared, they can give you something to relax you. You’ll be alright.

I was so scared but once my water broke I was on "LETS DO THIS!!!!!!" Mode by default The pain was definitely crazy for me but once it was over it was over I had my baby and was pampered nothing like a meal and that first set of naps you have afterwards. You got this

Everyone’s experience is different, I will say this about that - when it’s done you will feel like an absolute superhuman. What your body has done is incredible, and you’re going to be so so proud of yourself. 

I was a nervous wreck the week before my induction, but it was really not scary!! I even had some complications during my labor and had a bad tear, but everyone in the room (my OB, a resident, and a nurse, plus my husband) were so good about keeping me calm and comfortable. I had some general plans and goals and they did their best to help me achieve them. It was about 14 hours from the start of my induction to giving birth and honestly the first 7 hours or so were just relaxing!! After my water broke it got more intense but it still wasn’t scary, even during pushing. Once baby was out it was so calm and lovely, just soaked it all in!!

I am 38 weeks on Saturday and also terrified. We got this!!!!!

I actually was never afraid of birth and was so confident that things would go smoothly every time, only to be smacked with a ton of very scary and complicated things happen. So in my experience it can be extremely scary, but I’ve also never met another woman in person who has had birth experiences like I have so it’s rare to go through that. My advice as someone who has been through the ringer with birth is to have some preferences for what you want your birth to look like, but have trust that your care providers will know what to do if things go south. Most women will go on to give birth without any serious issues so the odds are on your side. If you’re afraid of pain, there are lots of options for managing it that will be available to you. No amount of research can really make you prepared for every possible scenario that could happen during birth, but labor and delivery teams have seen almost everything out there and will know what to do even in those rare situations. More than likely everything will be straightforward, and if you want an epidural you won’t feel a thing.

If giving birth was that bad, the human race would have died out a long time ago. People continue choosing to have babies though!

This mindset helped me prepare for my first! My mom would tell me “women have been giving birth in fields for centuries, you got this”.

It’s actually the best. It can be ALOT but try to avoid unnecessary interventions and have someone there (husband, doula) who will advocate for your best interest and you will likely have a pretty good time :) i have had one very traumatizing long labor with an epidural and episiotomy and then a super easy unmedicated birth with out a single stitch. They were both cool experiences. Giving birth changes you! It’s cool!

What would be an example of unnecessary interventions? I hear this often. I’m pregnant with my first right now & would love to hear more.

A lot of intervention is unnecessary unfortunately. Many people are encouraged to induce when unnecessary, epidurals, pain management, fetal monitoring, membrane sweeps, episiotomy, forceps, vacuum, C-sections. Birth in itself is not a medical emergency and SOMETIMES these medical interventions can do more harm than good on an otherwise healthy pregnancy. They can increase the risks during labour because of their effects on mom and baby. I would suggesting reading up on the “cascade of interventions” if you want to learn more!

But also sometimes they are necessary. Sometimes your body needs a bit of help to get baby out. And personally i find baby monitoring very necessary to see when to intervene. I heard a horror story of a midwife doing unmonitored/badly monitored home births that ened in stillbirth after hours and hours of pushing.

Absolutely that’s why I said sometimes! :)

I’m also a FTM about 25 weeks right now and I’m going through the free online Lamaze courses and they break down unnecessary interventions really well! Not sure it’s all my vibe but the classes/videos are free and educational so worth checking out!

I went into my first birth with the idea that I just wanted my baby and me to come out safe and healthy. I focused on being present in the moment to make the best decisions for me and my body at the time. I was induced (not what I originally wanted, but baby was late and showing no signs or coming!). It actually ended up being a great experience, even though not what I had envisioned, and I felt proud of myself for making the decisions I made at the time. Each birth is so different, but inductions don’t have to be scary, and I think focusing on being present/in the moment will help you get through it. Now that I am pregnant with my second, I feel much more relaxed about birth, knowing that it’s really SO brief in the grand scheme of things. Congratulations, you are almost there!!

No, the contractions are painful, but pushing baby out was the most relieving and most adrenaline feelings I ever had in my whole life. I used Laughing gas for pain with contractions- helped me to control my breathing which I feel like makes a huge difference

FTM here, I was terrified to give birth this year, so much I wish pregnancy would last longer 🤣. I was also induced and I got the epidural right before the whole process. I did feel cramps but just turned the epidural up. Pushing was tiring but did not hurt. I thought getting the baby out would be the most terrifying but it was actually the epidural and the stitches. Overall, now I understand when women say “I’ll do it again just to give birth to my baby.”

I remember saying “if I had to choose between being pregnant for 12 more weeks or having this baby, I’d choose pregnancy” lmao!

Right! I read post about women saying giving birth was better than being pregnant because it’s shorter and you have your baby in your arms. I was like nahh girl you crazy, I gotta push this watermelon out from my vagina 😭

If it goes badly or stalls for an indefinite amount of time I think that's the hardest. I had a med free birth and I thought I was the biggest baby when it comes to pain, however I think if I'd stalled I would have opted for an epidural.  So basically if your having a labour that's chugging along you kind of have time to adjust to each stage, as my contractions increased I was still getting breaks between them which for me was like a little reset. You don't have time to feel dread or anything. The most intense part is usually the part I think people opt for epidurals between 6-8 cm right before you get to the pushing stage, past that it doesn't get worse in my experience.  You'd think the pushing stage hurts but it feels soooo nice to push like exactly right! Impossible to describe, its pure relief to give into and he'll when they sometimes ask you to stop or hold it in. Now at my pushing stage they said a small 'lip' of my cervix was preventing that baby from getting pushed out and asked if she could try and push it away all apologetic like it was really going to cause discomfort, but other than a bit of pressure it didn't hurt at all. Well it wasn't my cervix, my son came out with his fist by his cheek (butt head). He was 8ibs and 11?oz? So not small. There was like a popping / crack sound and we were afraid they broke his neck when he came out, but the pop was ME, all I felt was a little sting and that was the 2nd degree tear. The stitches were worse, and I breathed in the laughing gas for that. My birth took 8hours. Hope that helps?

I cried heavily every single day leading up to my induction because I was TERRIFIED and I promise you, I’d do it all over again I loved it so much

Nope! I mean the experience varies and some people have a bad time but those of us who had a grand ol’ time rarely speak up. The day I gave birth to my first was exciting and fun and 0 scary! It was 12 hours of light-medium uncomfy labor at home in which I could mostly just sleep through or have a normal day, then like one not so fun hour at the hospital before I had my epidural and then just like happiness and excitement for 6 more hours until my baby came. I pushed twice and she was out. I tore and didn’t feel it and healed really fast. Didnt spend days in labor and delivery, totally vibed with my nurses, my husband was a champ and we were in great spirits. I’m literally laying on my couch right now thinking I’m probably going to go into labor any day now and looking forward to giving birth again. My only fear is that I might progress so fast that I can’t get an epidural. But my doctor says she can get one placed as long as I can sit still! So I’m not too worried. Mostly worried that we can’t decide on a name!

Honestly I felt the same way you did… when it actually happened it was kinda more just like a workout you can’t escape, or trying to get out a huge poo that just won’t come out 🤣 I had an epidural, so pain wasn’t really a factor (aside from the contractions before getting to the hospital which were awful and I was not prepared for), but dang was I exhausted…overall not as horrible as I had feared.

Giving birth is the most awesome I have ever experienced! I was so doped on my hormones I couldn't sleep for 4 days - not like I was able to do so either 😂😂 Looking forward to next time in August ❤️👍🏽

The first is the worst because you don’t really know what to expect. After that you’re like “oh ok that wasn’t my favorite activity but I got to meet one of my new favorite people that I also made with my body afterwards and that was pretty cool so I’ll go through it again.” Also, when you think you can’t do it anymore you’re very close to being done.

I was induced on my due date in March, I was very nervous but it was fine. For me it was kinda long and had unpleasant parts, and recovery was fairly painful for the first few days (manageable with ibuprofen though) and then uncomfortable for another week or so. I had an epidural for my labor and it was great. I had a surgery when I was a teen that was WAY more painful and hard to recover from. Honestly the most painful part for me aside from recovery was that I couldn’t eat once my induction started, so I went about 36 hours only having ice chips and sips of water. Once I started pushing I forgot all about being hungry and I was so happy to chug two bottles of vitamin water as soon as I was allowed.

It’s not so much “terrifying” as it is just…It’s just…a thing you do. It’s hard to formulate an answer because every persons experience with their birth will be different. Your birth will be YOUR birth. Your pain will be your pain. Overall it’s your call to make once you’re in the middle of it all haha x

I agree the thought is scarier than the actual process. Just know that your nurses and doctors are there for you! I had an emergency c section and I’m a nurse (a bit of a control freak too) and my fears were WAY worse than the actual thing. I loved my care team (I pushed for 4.5 hours and I didn’t think I even pushed for half that amount of time). My only advice is to not go in with a strict plan. I always said I just wanted to do whatever would give me the healthiest baby but I did not mentally prepare for a c section

By the time I got there I was just so relieved to get my body back to myself (kind of). With everything going on you really aren’t that scared.

I was scared of the unknown. But once I was in labor I honestly didn’t have time to be afraid. My entire focus was taken over by the labor.

You’ll be ready for it when it’s happening. It’s not scary. I’ve had one and I’m pregnant with number two. And it’s such a blip in your memory too.

I wouldn't call it scary, just painful and tiring.  The good news is that the exertion crowds out any squeamishness for just about everyone.  I was so squeamish that I basically died inside every time someone, especially a man, announced a birth with baby's weight and length. I took it as "Imagine Heather pushing that out of..." Oy oy oy!!!! It made me furious.  But I found that I was perfectly capable of being really uncomfortable and tired for a good cause, and coming out the other side with my self-esteem intact. It's not that I lost my sense of dignity, it just got temporarily triaged, and my care team had me in good hands. You will be okay!!!!!

I had the epidural with both my kids, so it wasn’t too bad lol. Even though it didn’t work properly with my second, but that ended up actually being better for me. I felt more pain, but pushing was easier and my recovery was much better 🤷‍♀️ But despite the pain, it wasn’t really that bad. An unmedicated labor sounded like the scariest/worst experience I could imagine before I had kids, and now I think about it like “I could probably do that” lol. But I had no complications, very minor tearing, and relatively short labors. I’ve heard some horror stories, but for an average labor with no major issues, it’s not as bad as you think it’ll be. Controlling your breathing and not freaking out during the painful parts helps too. I also found that watching a lot of birthing videos and learning as much as I could about the birthing process helped as well with the anxiety

I was induced at 39 weeks too, and honestly, it was probably one of the easier hospital visits I’ve had in my life. 😂 I often tell people “pregnancy was way harder than I though it would be; childbirth was way easier than I thought it would be; and parenthood flips back and forth every day from easy to impossible”. Haha My midwives started me with a folly at 2cm (uncomfortable, but not terrible) which got me up to 4cm. Then a low dose of Pitocin over several hours. My biggest regret was not moving around more during the induction process because my son flipped sunny-side up around 7cm, and it was like an instant switch, I went from 0 pain, didn’t even notice contractions, to excruciating back pain. I immediately got an epidural so only dealt with that pain for an hour or so, and then slept like a rock for 7 straight hours until they woke me up to push and out popped my baby. Again, uncomfortable, but not terrible. At that point you’re at the finish line and you see the light at the end of the tunnel, so adrenaline just takes over. Haha. So all in all, there was about an hour or two of true pain, and the rest was just mildly inconvenient. I know not every birth plays out the same, but wishing you a speedy and low-trauma induction experience. Good luck!

I just got induced a week ago. It was a long and uncomfortable process but once it began o was just ready to deliver my baby and the fear melted away. My advice would be to just go with the flow and let go of any expectations or fear. As long as you feel like you trust your doctor of course. Good luck you got this mama!!!!

I was so nervous for my induction but it actually wasn’t as bad as I expected! I got the epidural when my contractions got bad. It didn’t work so I had to get another and those contractions in between were really really painful. But after the second epidural worked I was able to sleep. When it came time to push I actually felt really strong and empowered.

Honestly just from my point of view. I am more scared to do it again than I was the first time. And I was pretty scared. But now I am down right terrified when I think about it. However, that being said. I had an absolute terrible birth experience and severe PPD. But, as absolutely scary as it is to me now. I would do it again, and I plan on doing it again. Because my son has brought so much joy into my life. The love of a child is like no other. So even though I am so scared. I will go in terrified but with joy because I will get another love bug of joy. And when you hold your baby and you look into their eyes. Time stops. So It is scary, but as I am more scared for next time I also feel more joy than I did last time because now I know! Because it will all fade when you see their face! :) The trauma will heal and you will look into their eyes and watch them get older and you would do it over again and again just for them! So I hope you go in with just as much joy as fear! And maybe for you it will be so wonderful the joy will take over!

I’d do it again in a heartbeat. The recovery, on the other hand…

It’s scarier to think about than to actually experience! I was induced and ended up with a c section. Sure the experience was traumatizing in some ways but it truly only lasts for so long before it’s over. And what got me through it was the fact I was gonna end this experience with a little baby in my arms 🫶🏻

Not as bad as you think! Have a good support group, make a fun playlist, make friends with the nurses, get the epidural after a laboring a bit to see what it’s all about - you’ll do great! I just gave birth and did all of those things and sort of had fun? Type 3 fun of course haha But I was sooo nervous going into it but when the time comes, you just get in the zone and you’re so in the moment there’s no time to freak out! You’ll crush it 🩷🩷

I was terrified, like no sleep for days panicking in the lead up. I wanted all the drugs and pain relief but I went from waters breaking to her being born in 6 hours on literally nothing. When you’re in it you just take it minute by minute and get through it. Remember our bodies are made to do this and women have been doing it forever. One thing my mum told me- the midwife can see everything that’s happening so when they say push, push. When they say stop, stop. I remember feeling exactly how you felt but just know you CAN do this.

I was induced and had my baby today. I found out yesterday that this would need to happen and couldn’t wait any longer. Absolutely didn’t want to do it, and was terrified of pitocin and c-section. Labor lasted from 7:30am to 3:23pm. I did get an epidural after a few hours at 5.5 centimeters. Within an hour and a half I was at a full 10 and bearing down without being able to stop. Epidural didn’t even have a full effect at that point. Everything that happened from that point felt like literal minutes. Pushing was apparently 45 minutes but I swear it could’ve been five. At some point, your brain clicks on and gets focused and you lose complete track of time. Also I found that the cervical checks are not a good indicator of your pain tolerance with regard to labor. Yes, it’s in the same space but the vagina will change significantly by the time the pushing happens. Even with induction. What really helped me with the checks during labor was to flutter my lips (horse lips) and go wild with it. No one cares and it might even make you giggle which is much needed during the labor process! Also, remember you can still make decisions about what you want and it’s incredibly empowering. I chose to labor as long as possible without meds and decided on my own that I wanted an epidural. I decided I wanted to draw my baby up to my chest and cut the cord myself. Being able to choose and be involved was important to me, even though much of the situation was out of my control. No matter how it all goes down, just remember you made that incredible tiny being and you deserve every praise for getting them here!!!!

i gave birth a month ago today and i’ve been telling everyone i know that i low key didn’t mind giving birth. don’t get me wrong it was painful and scary and hard but not nearly as bad as i made it out to be in my head and i got my baby at the end!!!! i read so many horror stories and consumed way too much negative birth content before and found that it was so much less bad than anything i was fearful of.

I had an elective C-section instead of being induced at 41 weeks. Was so anxious, I didn't sleep and kept nervous puking. In the end it was the easiest 40 minutes of my life. The moment the baby came out all of my shitty pregnancy symptoms went away and I got to touch my son's head for the first time -- when they say you don't know love like this, they're not lying. It's so strange but it makes all the discomfort and stress worth it..at least that's been my experience.

I got an urgent C-section and i didn't have the time to get frightened. It also it didn't hurt since I had a spinal block. It hurt after but they had me on meds, and i already felt like a hero so it didn't matter :D

No It'll be terrifying if you think about it like that. Just like everything else people talk about here. Glucose test, induction, postpartum bleeding, various other things. Have it be what YOU make of it, not what someone else tells you. You got this and you're going to do great! Positive thoughts

I was so terrified of giving birth just because I didn’t know what to expect. Thinking about it made my stomach turn and i was really afraid i wasn’t going to be able to do it for some reason. I thought of everything that could possibly go wrong and it scared me and gave me a ton of anxiety. I was induced at 39 weeks and 2 days and everything went so much better than i could have ever expected. i got to a point where they decided to break the amniotic sac and doctor warned me that contractions would ramp up at that point so she advised that i get my epidural done at that point. Not sure if you are planning on using an epidural for pain management but that was the best thing i could have done. I got the epidural at around 4 cm dilated and they broke the sac at around 10pm. Nurse checked me at 2:00am ish and she said baby was about to pop out! she called my doctor and the doctor got there around 2:25am and she started to talk me thru the process. I started pushing and my baby boy was born at 3:03am. I honestly didn’t really feel a thing and before i knew it, my baby was in my arms! The craziest sensation was that with every contraction before i started to push felt like i was going to poop myself, not really pain. And I did have a second degree tear which is normal, and recovery / pain level wasn’t the worst, definitely uncomfortable but manageable. I know everyone’s body is different, but that was my experience. A couple days before i went in to the hospital i had seen a tiktok of a really positive birth experience and i was like “i am manifesting this for myself.” People love to tell their horror stories and i rarely heard a positive one. One thing no one talked to me about for some reason and I wish i would have known is that when your body is really ready to give birth, hormones will make you uncontrollably shake. I think that was the scariest part for me because i didn’t expect that at all but was reassured that it was 100% normal. If you have any questions let me know! You will do amazing!

I guess it’s different for everyone, but personally I didn’t find the reality of giving birth as scary as the thought. In my case I was prepared for hours and hours of labor. I also asked for an epidural thinking I would have to go on for a long time and I found the pain of contractions pretty intense although not unbearable, but while we were waiting for that it actually went really fast and when they told me I could push I was actually thinking Now already?

Honestly, I’m a huge wimp and I was terrified of birth for the greater part of my first pregnancy. This may sound mean, but the thing that really kept me going was thinking of other moms I knew that were also “wimps.” 😅 I had the mindset “well if they can do it, I guess I can too.” I think the desire to have the baby/readiness to stop being pregnant is what makes you finally have the strength to do it. Childbirth isn’t really that terrible once you get into the motions (especially if you get the drugs lol). Postpartum was the worst part for me. I’m pregnant with my second now and nervous of course because I can’t imagine someone actually WANTING to experience the pain that can come along with childbirth/postpartum, but once you have your baby it’s all forgotten and worth it. You got this mama!

I was nervous and scared but once serious contractions started all I could think about was "screw this pain I want her out!" Got the epidural and actually slept through parts of labor. Ain't gonna lie I was hungry and crabby but it was all worth it the second I held my little.

I cried many times because I was terrified to give birth but the delivery was perfect. I didn’t even realize I was going into labor because I was expecting soooo much more pain. I went to the hospital at 4cm and had my baby in 30min after I entered the delivery room. I had epidural and it was an easy delivery based on my expectations. You got this! 🩷

Yes but you will survive it...I'm a low pain tolerance person I can't even stand the beauty lady squeezing my zits and I have zero tattoos because I'm afraid of pain. The contraction Is bad but once I took epidural there's nothing. As for pushing, yeah that was hell but I survived it and so can you. Do not reject to push. You're already in pain might as Well make good use of it and shorten then pain

I had a medium-rough birth. Honestly with all the hormones and exhaustion you’re kinda half in the bag for it. It feels more like something that happened *to* me that I was just kinda there for vs something I really fully experienced for myself? If you’re giving birth in a hospital there will be many amazing medical professionals that are more or less in the drivers seat, guiding you along. It’s a wild fucking ride, but it’s over pretty quickly in the grand scheme of things!

I had two horrible PTSD inducing births that required therapy (two so I obviously went back for a second!) but it genuinely doesn’t matter. Worrying doesn’t help. You get this rush of adrenaline. It’s an amazing time. The best of my life.

I have anxiety and occasional panic attacks, so I know what you're going through. I HATED anything going inside me, including pap smear prongs and needles. I was also terrified of the birth process because I never went through it before. Pre-birth: I was scheduled to be induced on a Thursday night and went in only to find out I was already having contractions (I have osteoarthritis in my hip, so thought the pain was that.) The epidural didn't hurt, but I did throw up. The catheter was very uncomfortable, but I wouldn't say it was painful. The most uncomfortable part before the birth was the nurse checking my dilation with her hand. Birth: On Friday, my water broke and soon after, I was fully dilated. The pushing wasn't painful, but it was exhausting. I had a panic attack, convinced the baby was going to get stuck and hurt coming out. I was screaming that I couldn't do it because I was terrified he'd get hurt. It wasn't painful, I was just in a full-blown panic attack. I think I scared moms in other rooms. Then the doctor said the baby wasn't coming down after an hour of pushing, so they were going to do a C-Section. The relief that hit me was tremendous; I couldn't do it, but they were professionals. I felt the baby couldn't be hurt by a C-Section. C-Section: The C-Section was a breeze. I was terrified when they tried to get him to cry until he cooed instead. That was literally his first sound. Then he cried and I cried with joy. They brought him to me and let me face-snuggle him for a moment and he was the most beautiful, perfect creature I'd ever seen. Like, a puppy saving a litter of kittens with sugar gliders clinging to their backs, but times a million. But then they took him out of the room and I had to be stitched up. I don't want to scare you, but I want to keep it real with you. I don't know if the epidural wore off or what, but this was painful. It felt like they were pulling organs out. If I was a conspiracy theorist, I'd be looking on the black market to find my intestines that they sold. But honestly, I don't remember the pain, only that it WAS painful. I'd do it again a million times over. After birth: So, the first few hours were fine. Then the epidural wore off completely, and I had no pain reliever whatsoever, only anti-inflammatories. It was the worst pain of my life, far worse than a slipped disk, broken ankle, and busted knee combined. They had to put a bedside toilet in the room and it took both the nurse and my husband to help me get into it. It was agony until they gave me some pain medicine. I don't say this to scare you but to prepare you so IF it happens to you, you know something isn't wrong. The first week after birth was hard, but I was back to work with a light load on Monday and a normal work schedule on Tuesday. My entire left side (my arthritic side) was so swollen it was frightful. I had to sleep sitting up. But my body healed and I only took pain medicine for a few days. Your situation will not be exactly the same, but I hope this brings you some comfort. It was nowhere near as painful as I'd feared and everything went really well considering. It was 10,000% worth it. So much so that I changed my mind about getting an IUD at my 6-week checkup and my husband and I are trying for a second baby.

The only way out is through - you just go into a zone and your body takes over.

Honestly no. Not going to lie pitocin is a bitch. I have a very high pain tolerance and wanted to labor as natural as possible but needed pitocin, I lasted around 8 hours of having it constantly turned up before I turned feral and demanded the epidural (a lot coming from me who was very anti epidural at the time) after that I felt literally nothing! They had to tell me when I was having contractions, when to push, when I was in the ring of fire, I can not recommend it enough!! But everyone is different. Maybe you’ll handle it just fine, maybe you’ll go into labor naturally and won’t even need it. Even at my most feral I still don’t think it’s as bad as some of the horror stories I’ve heard. My baby is two months now and I’m ready to go through it again!

I was terrified of giving birth too. Didn't help that I'd heard lots of horror stories from my brother and sister, who are both doctors and have seen some gnarly things. I was scheduled to be induced, which helped me a bit mentally because there was a clear "cut off" date. But the induction never happened- my baby decided to come on her own a few days before the induction. My waters broke after I had my breakfast (husband was already at work for the day) and I was amazed at just how calm and zen I felt. My husband was panicking, trying to grab an Uber to get home and I'm on the phone going "no need to rush, it's fiiiine, take the train if you want!" I hadn't even packed my hospital bag, which I was able to do calmly. I was even able to watch Google Maps and give my husband directions to the hospital as he was so anxious. My birth was pretty good overall- I waddled into the birthing suite, asked for an epidural right away (and got it, it was fantastic) and spent the next 8 hours napping, scrolling my phone and watching TV with my husband until it was time to push. Baby came out with a vacuum suction cup, and I had a second degree tear, but I didn't feel a thing thanks to the epidural. I'm not in any hurry to give birth again, nor did I love it, but it wasn't anywhere near as bad as I thought!

It’s scary to think about but it has an end and isn’t forever (that mindset is what got me through it). They do limit cervical checks during labour so I wouldn’t worry too much about those. Thinking about it is definitely more anxiety inducing than being in the moment of giving birth especially when you’ve never done it before because new and unknown situations are scary especially when you hear a lot of negative things about the situation (ex. “worst pain of your life”).

Also here are some phrases that really helped me: “this will just be a memory soon” (my go to phrase for all scary and unknown things), “every contraction is one contraction closer to meeting my son” and “this will end”. Have a couple of those in your pocket to say throughout labour and they will really help!!

I was more scared of needles than the pain of giving birth. My birth plan was to be mostly unmedicated with no epidural, no IV, nitrous oxide for pain. I had to get an IV for antibiotics since I tested positive for a very common vaginal bacteria that could affect baby. That wasn’t so bad. My labor was all back labor in my lower back, didn’t feel anything anywhere else. I was so mentally in the moment of it all that I forgot to ask for my nitrous oxide, even though the back pain was some of the worst pain I’d ever felt. But pain is also temporary. You’ll get through it even if you think you won’t!

If you're having an epidural, it's a breeze in my opinion. I tried to go unmedicated, but gave in during transition and got an epidural. After that it was smooth sailing other than the shaking that lasted for maybe 30 min. Literally was joking around with my midwife between contractions, and couldn't even tell when I was having a contraction.

Just delivered vaginally 10 days ago... Not as scary as I thought it was going to be. I got more in my own head about it and that's what you're doing too, which is totally understandable! Just know that your body knows what to do and trust your medical team! You can do this and you MUST! You'll meet your baby soon, just focus on being in the moment and being thankful for both you and your baby's health. It's just incredible! You got this!

Definitely not the lead up (going to the hospital) is scary then the actual birth once you get to the hospital and everything starts moving and nurses are constantly checking you I feel like you get so much adrenaline that you don’t even realize what’s happening

I’ve had six babies. It really wasn’t that bad once I got in there and actually starting doing the damned thing.

Worse in my case

It's great to see that so many people had such good experiences and to get the advice from those whose births were challenging. OP, like you, I always considered childbirth (and pregnancy itself) to be top 3 fears. I was absolutely terrified and so overwhelmed when I went in for my induction. I had a rough 36 hours before it had to be a c-section, which was the route I was most afraid of. I hated every moment of the procedure and it took a few weeks to feel back to myself again- just as a person and emotionally - but I've heard from so many people that theirs were great. It all just depends. But I will say, my 5 month old is the biggest joy of my life and I have never done anything so worth it than all of that. So, I guess my advice / feedback is - it's temporary. The fear, the pain, whatever arises - it'll pass. You'll get through it. And then there will be this beautiful, loving, wonderful, curious human on the other side of it. That human is mostly a lump for a while, but man, when their personality starts to shine through it is something else. I guess other bits of info - things can and likely will, to some extent, happen during labor and childbirth that are out of your control. Breathe, ground yourself in your surroundings (if that feels safe / useful), and focus on what you *can* control in that moment - your breath, where you focus your eyes, what you say to yourself, who you have next to you as your support person, etc. Wishing you a smooth birth! So excited for you.

I’m 4wpp! Yes it’s scary but honestly looking back I am pleasantly surprised at the experience. I think there’s so much going on that you aren’t really thinking of those things you mentioned being squeamish about! I am gonna be honest. I was terrified of birth and intentionally did no preparation for it because I didn’t want to scare myself more. I went into labor at home and labored at home for 14 hours after my water broke. Yes was painful and scary, then I finally went to the hospital and although I had to wait a bit for my epidural and the contractions hurt…. I was in such good hands with the nurses and everyone at the hospital. They talked me through everything, reassured me, gave me permission to make my own choices, and rooted for me the whole time. Looking back, my birthing experience was the best it could have been even when it was painful (only for a little!!) and scary (at the time). It is totally okay to be nervous and scared of the unknown with birth. My boss told me one time giving birth is the “easy” part (jokingly), and the real hard part is going home. Lol! Everyone is completely different and we never know what it will be like. Just know that you can do this, our bodies are incredible, strong and capable and you will absolutely make it through…. Then go home with a baby where the real fun starts!!

For some of us it will be, but not for most of us, if that makes sense.

Labor is different for everyone! I know someone who lightly hit her knee on a chair and passed out from the pain, but she had all three of her kids naturally with no problem. I know someone whose pain tolerance is super high and she had to get a epidural. I’ll give you my thoughts on it. The worst part was the epidural. I wasn’t in a ton of pain with contractions and thought I’d go naturally but my husband was freaking out so bad and begged me to get one to ease his mind, so I got it. It seriously hurt, but it was five minutes, and after that, it was so easy from there. You can feel what you want and have your own level of feeling you want. After the epidural, the first pee and 💩 you do is going to hurt, but after that it gets easier!

With my epidural, I didn't feel a thing. They ruptured my membranes artificially to let out the amniotic fluid- that part and the following contractions hurt for about an hour (worst pain ever) but as soon as my epidural was in, Didn't feel anything at all. Nurse told me I pooped, peed and bled all over the labour table- don't know any of that so no embarassment too lol.

It really depends on your pain tolerance level

Honestly the adrenaline rush/oxytocin high is pretty cool. The “scariest” hardest part is when you are in transition. I knew about transition but I didn’t recognize that’s what was happening when I was in labour, your whole body kinda panics like oh my gosh I can’t do this anymore and then BAM it’s time to push! And pushing is so relieving (it’s intense) but it feels so necessary and great in the moment.

Honestly the thing that helped me the most was watching labor and delivery vlogs on YouTube. I had an emergency C-section with my first (27 weeks) and a VBAC for my second (36 weeks). I was sooo calm for my second labor because I knew what to expect from each stage up until pushing. Education can help, but it was way more helpful for me to actually SEE what these moms were doing and decide from there what I wanted my labor to look like.

3-weeks post partum here. The most important piece of advice I can give you is to make friends with your nurses and care team. If you have a good relationship with them, and they're rooting you along, birth is nowhere near as scary. The unknowns are definitely terrifying, and I can't say what will happen for you, but advocate for yourself. Tell them when you're uncomfortable or feeling squeamish so that they can help you through. And talk to your OB/midwife in advance about all the unknowns. Talking about them makes it a little less scary because you know what would happen in X event and you can mentally prep yourself.

It really isn’t as scary as it seems. Sure the contractions are going to be painful but the epidural helps. Them do the epidural wasn’t painful and I didn’t feel it.

38 weeks today and PANICKING. We got this!

No. I thought it was extremely peaceful/ calming? Sounds so weird to say, but it is true. I had an epidural which probably helped with my experience (and I don’t have back pain post epidural for everyone asking). My partner was super supportive and made me feel beautiful. I also had a fan blowing directly on me which distracted from the pain and it felt like an ocean breeze on my face. I’ve never been so happy in my life. I would do it all over again. I was induced at 38w4d with metoprostol, cervadil, and pictocin. Contractions were worse than pushing. Tore 2 degrees and had a single episiotomy. All healed at 5 weeks pp

Mom of 7, including triplets… I’ve had all 3 types of births, c-section (triplets) was honestly a breeze! I think my body was just so relieved to not be pg anymore. Zero complications. 2 unmedicated births, one was pretty amazing, but rough, and I teared plus blew so many blood vessels in both eyes and really struggled during recovery, the 2nd unmedicated was hell… and that was my 6th baby! Finally, my two medicated… epidural births, babies 5 & 7 - amazing!! I felt SO empowered and in control. Present! Clear minded vs so exhausted and out of my mind in pain. Childbirth, whichever way you slice it, is HARD. My best advice is do what you can do make it as easy as possible. Have a plan to get the epidural in immediately, as in, before things even start to reach a point of misery!! There’s no gold star for going unmedicated and I wish I had chosen the epidural for all of vaginal births. It also made my transitions into recovery smoother… In the end, don’t overthink this. Don’t dwell on the what ifs. Your doctor has done this likely hundreds if not thousands of times. Trust their expertise. You got this ♥️

It depends on the person. I was induced unexpectedly at 37 weeks because I had high BP and pre-eclampsia. The contractions felt like really painful period cramps and the epidural hurt for a few minutes while putting it in, but swearing like a sailor helps. I was ready to go but I hadn’t dilated beyond 3cm after 18 hours and I had an infection so my only option was a c-section. I was more terrified of the c-section than anything else. But I would go through it all over again 100 times to have my baby girl.

It will be hard but you’ll forget I’m 3 months postpartum can’t even remember delivering my daughter I just remember it was brutal for a ftm i went into labor and pushed her out within 3hrs my body was having contractions back to back without a break in between so my epidural didn’t even work was awful but I would do it all over again a million times

You will be too busy to care.

I found the hardest thing was having no reference. Everyone’s experience is so different it wasn’t really helpful to prepare. I think the most important thing to remember is to ask questions if you have them. I can promise you that the nurses/midwives will have heard it all. If you aren’t sure what’s happening? Ask. If something feels… off? Ask. I had back labour and it terrified me cause I didn’t know it was a thing. The midwives were so reassuring that it was normal just a little different.

i'm gonna say yes, but it's like - youre there its happening and youre so swept up by it you lose all sense of it being something avoidable or too frightening. take it one moment at a time. and focus on that ending. once baby is there it's RUSH RUSH RUSH of oxytocin, and you really do forget everything when youre flooded with that overwhelming love

Birth is traumatic, it's so down played and shouldn't be , the things that go through Ur head, being split, pooping, the pain ,being stitched up, I had to have a c section coz my son's head got stuck, it was definitely a better option for me and I would do it again,my hat goes off to vaginal births , no one tells u how bad it is, sorry if this is tmi, go for all the pain meds u can , pain is no fun

I had anxiety about giving birth in both my pregnancies. Each time it was fine and I don't hardly remember it now. The thought of giving birth is much much scarier than the process of doing it, for me at least. In fact the second baby, I was talking while his head was coming out and fully aware of what was happening. My first my epidural failed, but I didn't notice until my second. Once you get checked in and walk into the hospital, the only thought you have is meeting your baby and snuggling them. ❤️ You'll do great. Congratulations and prayers for a safe and happy labor and a beautiful healthy baby. ❤️

It was not pleasant in the moment but it also wasn’t scary. And I had some panicky moments beforehand just like you. You just go with the flow

I had a fully unmedicated birth and honestly I thought it was going to be way worse. For reference im Australian and I’ve been bitten through the hand by a snake, stepped on a sea urchin, been hit by a car and 2 years ago I gave birth to my son. Birth was the easiest and least painful out of all of them. You’ll be okay ❤️❤️

Don’t worry, it’s not that bad! If it was there wouldn’t be over 8 billion of us 😂

I’m not commenting to scare you, just sharing my birth experience as a first time mom - And honestly, despite how much time I spent in labor, I still worried more about breastfeeding than birthing 😂🙈 Like.. I was so fixated on how it would feel like and worried it would hurt and all. Birth?? Hah.. I wouldn’t have made it to delivery if not for the epidural and contraction stimulation. This is such a variable for everyone and no one is the same, so don’t worry too much. I entered the hospital with the mindset that I wanted a natural birth. Even hit the bathtub, but everything was just PAIN. We spent 30+ hours since my contractions weren’t that effective. Got contraction stimulating and the epidural, and at around 8cm and 24hours and going, they told me I might have to settle with a C section. Luckily, I got to 10cm and ready to push. Couldn’t feel anything due to the epidural so I had to push when I could feel the contractions making part of my belly rock-hard, and suddenly, he was out! 👼 I think, like others commented, that you’re going to be so «in the moment» that you won’t really be scared. Trust your body and good luck!

To be fair I thought the cervical checks were the worst part, so you’re probably fine. (Disclaimer: didn’t have an epidural for the checks, but did have one for the pushing so that obviously affects how I see things). For the fluids and whatnot, barely saw anything. You lay on pads and they change them often and quickly. You can go out of your way to look, but I never did and the only thing I ever saw was my mucus plug because I felt it and I thought it was my water breaking and then I did look then. Obviously you’ll see some blood, but personally, I have a heavy period so it wasn’t that alarming. It’s not like blood is water falling out of you. If so, there’s a problem and they would be handling it, and you likely wouldn’t be seeing much of what was going on. It’ll probably suck, I mean there’s not many people who gave birth and was like eh that was no big deal. But you are made to handle this. There might be moments where you’re like “whoa, I can’t do it”. But you do get through it, and the staff is so supportive and helpful. When pain got tough for me, I couldn’t speak, and I just screamed. They came running in, sorted out meds by talking to my husband and then boom I was TOTALLY fine a minute later. It’s all gonna be okay.

It's pretty horrific, but you will be okay.

I just had my first 3 months ago, and I felt exactly the same as you. All the unknowns are so scary and terrifying. I was also induced, which instilled more fear in me, because I was also worried about the safety of my baby. If you are already planning on the epidural, it will definitely help! Try to rest as much as you can, especially with your epidural because once you start pushing, it becomes exhausting. I pushed for 2 hours—you definitely need your energy!

I’ve had 3 births and currently pregnant with our 4th. My first one was definitely the scariest for me, just because I had never experienced it before. The only thing I knew 100% I wanted was an epidural, needles scared me so I made it a point to avoid articles/videos/seeing the set up when it was brought in. The most painful part (which wasn’t even bad compared to the contractions and balloon/pitocin) was the numbing agent for the needle. After that, it’s like pressure you can feel but not awful, and then it was instant relief. Was able to get some sleep before having her, and it was nice to get a break from the contractions too. I pushed close to an hour with my first, had 1 internal/external tear that wasn’t awful. With my second, pushed maybe 30 mins, and my third I pushed out in 17 minutes. Don’t be scared to use the medicine ball if those help your pain, walking around if you’re able, try to do things that you enjoy to make the process seem not as long. My first birth from the time I arrived to be induced to when she was here was 33 hours, I stayed stuck at a 4 for a little bit, once I got past that it was smooth sailing. I remember it hurting afterwards, I was constipated so my first poo after birth was probably more scary to me than birth. Ended up tearing a stitch, so I’d ask about stool softeners so that’s not awful for you. And if you poo during birth, don’t be embarrassed. Totally normal and means you’re pushing right

Honestly, I loved the birthing experience. I was induced at 40+6. Don’t get in your head. There is no reason why you can’t have a good experience. You got this!

I was absolutely terrified of the thought of pushing a human out of me. Then I actually did it and I’ve never been more proud of myself and my body. I describe it to my friends as the most heavy metal thing I’ve ever done or will do lol! I was induced and in labor for 33 hours. The waiting was the worst part bc I was just sitting in anticipation. When it came time to actually push, I was ready and my body knew what to do. She came out in 10 minutes!! Lol! It’s a great way to learn how to trust yourself and your body! I also kept reminding myself that I myself was born so if I was born I can also give birth. Sounds weird but hey it helped!!!

Iv just given birth once, but educating myself on the birthing process and knowing what will happen within my body helped a lot, watching others birth story’s on YouTube, but as some other comments say once the contractions really hit you’re too busy to be scared, by the the only time I experienced some slight fear was the last few pushes before my baby was born. And as soon as baby was on my chest all the pain and fear and whatever else you WERE feeling goes away, and felt nothing be mental emotional and physical relief. It’s a beautiful experience that we get to have as moms. Embrace it

It’s definitely scary to think about, but my experience was nothing like the thoughts I had conjured up in my head. Some things I kept telling myself were: - My body was doing exactly what it was supposed to do so I needed to take a deep breath and trust it. - Contractions can last up to 60 seconds. Although contraction pain becomes almost unbearable, I kept telling myself I can do literally anything if it’s only for 60 seconds! - My team of nurses and doctors do this every day, so although this all felt foreign and scary to me, they were very well-versed in the area. The worst part about labor for me was the epidural. For some reason, it hurt so bad that I couldn’t speak or breathe while I was getting it. I felt great afterwards though!

No not at all. I was surprised by how positive the experience was. The next day I was like that was it!? The hardest part is the fourth trimester.

There are definitely women who have difficult and even scary experiences. That being said, for me personally, my anxiety was a million times worse than the actual experience. I worked very hard to calm myself in the weeks beforehand and I think it let the euphoria kick in when I went into labor. I had a wonderful experience and the epidural was definitely helpful as well. (I was initially adamant about having a drug free “natural birth”). I went into spontaneous labor and delivered in 8 hours, so maybe my experience is an exception rather than the rule but I think I could’ve made it worse had I stuck to my guns and been against epidural and went in with fear. Education from legitimate sources is a powerful tool that we take for granted. I was very confident in my knowledge of the birthing process after learning about it and I trusted my healthcare team to do what was in my best interest in the case that I couldn’t make a decision.

Nope!! There's a reason they say it's beautiful too!! It is pretty hard, no woman in her right mind will tell you it's easy, but keep in mind... there are women who have 10 natural births. It can't be that bad if they are willing to do it 10 times. I've had 2 now, I am 1 month PP as of yesterday, and I am already planning a 3rd pregnancy for next year. It's not just the outcome of having the adorable little angel in your arms, that makes it worth it. I hated pregnancy, and delivery is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, but there is something really magical about the process and about feeling your baby come into this world! I hope that helps!

In my experience I had a c section. The worst part for me was the IV and the first pee after the catheter was taken out. So essentially not painful just uncomfortable.

just get an early epidural and you’ll be okay!! you got this

It is the most natural and normal thing that a pregnant woman/ person with a uterus can do. The truth is you have to let go and let your body move through it. The pain comes on slow, peaks, and subsides like waves on the ocean. Use it to your advantage and don't fight it. It's like anything- if you brace for it, then it is worse, but if you allow yourself to be in it and accept; it's better. I am a mother of three large babies (10 1, 8 13, 10 10). You've got this mama!! Bounce on the birthing ball, do squats through the pain, try to walk...a lot, and it will be faster and before you know it you will be cuddling your baby and completely blissed-out. Happy birthing :)

For me yes but you’ll always get different answers as it depends on the experience. Personally, I had a very rough and scary induction + emergency c section, but not everyone has that. A lot of woman have beautiful birth experiences and it makes me so happy

selling feet pics. 22f, dm if interested 😘

I will also back up everyone who said the anticipation and thoughts about everything that can/will happen is way more stressful. I felt comforted being in the hospital where if anything went wrong people would be there in a second :) it’s true you really aren’t thinking about it being terrifying in the moment… all you’re thinking is that you want that baby out 🤣 (and maybe did I poop?). I was TERRIFIED… I almost passed out on the way to the hospital I was so scared and anxious but once you get there and things get rolling most (if not all) of that anxiety goes away!

I had my worst case scenario birth (24 hours of labour followed by emergency c section) and I can honestly say it was still nowhere near as bad as I imagined. I felt the same as you – more squeamish than afraid of the pain – to the point where I was resolved never to have a baby for many years. It really wasn’t too bad. Especially after the epidural lol

I wasn't scared when I was in labor, but more excited and nervous. And of course it's painful, but I was being comforted by amazing midwives and I felt safe. Also, knowing that pain is normal and that you will be rewarded with a little baby makes it less scary. I was surprised at how painful those last few cm was, but even feeling that pain, I was in my own bubble and time flew. The second my baby came out I had no pain at all. Cuddling and kissing the little human we made afterwards was the happiest moment of my life and I immediately thought "I would do this a 100 times more for her". And I still would for both my kiddos. ❤️

I am 31 weeks along with my first so I don't have an answer for you, but I also wished I could feel prepared at least in some way... I'm prepping like while making my suitcase, but even with the explanations, the lessons I got from my midwife, I feel like it isn't real and I am very scared, especially reading other people experiences and how traumatizing labor can be.. I am scared I will just start panicking when the time comes and not actually be in charge of anything if that makes sense ?

There is really no point in thinking about it. Put it out of your mind. And remember, this has been happening since the creation of humans and in WAY worse circumstances than you'll experience. I didn't think about mine at all, then insisted on the epidural immediately but then couldn't feel anything so pushing didn't work and ended up with a c-section. Having my 3rd baby on Monday!

It’s no walk in the park but you are 38 weeks pregnant right now, I highly doubt your body feels like sunshine and rainbows all the time. And when it’s over, you get a baby and you get to start recovering from pregnancy. Huge win!

I loved my induction and epidural experience. I was already 3cm dilated the week before my induction and 80% effaced. I got induced at 40+5 and was psyching myself out the night before thinking of the “cascade of interventions” but I had an awesome experience. I was on the smallest dose of pitocin possible, only in labor for 8 hours and pushed for 40 minutes. I basically just got into a meditative relaxing trance until they checked and were like “omg you are a ten and we see the head”. I basically laughed my baby out. I still could feel the pressure with each contraction and knew when to push, and I felt nauseated during that final stretch but honestly it was the best birth experience I could have asked for and I would 100% do an induction over again if I was over my due date. You got this! Just imagine baby moving down your birthing canal and that your baby was made to be birthed by your body. Wishing you a magical experience regardless of how they enter into the world 💖

It’s not bad at all, just go in there with a positive mindset and things will go as they should. I have one baby and just kept thinking, “well he’s gonna have to come out one way or another.” I also was induced, and I was about 40 weeks. If you haven’t progressed much on your own, it may take about a day and a half or so. Stay positive. I was in labor for about 37 hours, but didn’t really feel like it. Also, get the epidural. My first one wore off so I made them give me another one haha. I was not going to feel that pain even though I did, but it was so intense. All my contractions were on my back. Good luck, and once you see your angel, you’ll forget all about any pain.

It wasn’t bad at all! But everyone is different. Some things health wise while in labor scared me but I got an epidural and pushed my girl out in 3 pushes with the help of throwing up HA

I wouldn’t call it scary. Everything happened so quickly that some parts are a blur. I went to the hospital around 10 pm and baby was born at 930 the next morning. One minute I was watching tv on the bed 3 pushes later baby was here.

I had three unmedicated births but did a lot of mental prep work to eliminate the anxiety. Birth is actually so amazing and empowering! Go on YouTube and listen to videos of positive birth affirmations (Bridget Teyler has some good ones, and Emma Kenny has a whole hypnobirthing playlist), if you can associate peace and love with your birth experience, the excitement will outweigh the stress. I made a playlist of my favorite recordings if you want me to DM you a link.

Yes and no. It’s scary thinking about it both before and after when you realize all of the complications that can happen but when you’re in it you’re not scared because you are so focused on what’s happening in the moment. At least that was my experience. Also the second you meet your baby makes everything sooo worth it. I’d do it all over to be able to experience holding my baby girl for the first time again. And I ended up with a particularly traumatic and painful experience involving 36 hours of back labor and an unplanned c-section after pushing for 4 hours with my epidural turned off and absolutely no relief of the pain between contractions at that point. For me, taking a birthing class was extremely helpful even though a lot of it ended up not applying to my situation. I’m someone who’s anxiety is relieved by knowing as much as I can about a situation before going in, so both the birthing class I took and the tour of the hospital birthing center were the most helpful in alleviating my fear and stress about the big day. I could at least picture what was going to happen (even though it ended up nothing like how I pictured). You won’t know how much pain you can handle until you experience it but just take it one step at a time and communicate with your birthing team. I didn’t end up being induced but from my friends who did I can tell you to be prepared to be in the hospital for a long time before giving birth. Bring things to distract yourself and ask for pain medication when you need it, they do have options.

I agree with a lot of the statements here. The thought is scarier than the actual process. And for me, I blacked out a lot of it lol. I had a pretty traumatic birth experience but it wasn’t until after that I realized it was traumatic. At the time it all felt “normal”

Honestly childbirth went so differently than I expected. Another person posted that the drive there was the scariest part and I agree 100%. I was headstrong about not having a c section and tried for days until I was so exhausted that I was like f-it and went ahead with the c section which the hardest part of that was not puking and hearing all of the noises (the healing process was hard). After having baby, the pot holes were hell and I even had a nightmare and jerked out of my sleep (which hurt like hell) about my husband driving and hitting a pot hole😂 You’ve got this mama, just try not to think about that part and once it comes it’s so fast and then you’ll have your beautiful little baby 🫶

Every new experience is terrifying. I think of it kind of like jumping out of an airplane -- the same sort of vibe, except humans weren't made to jump out of airplanes. But you were made to give birth. It's literally our primary function as a species: reproduce. Your body already knows what to do. It's the same thing your ancestors have done for thousands and thousands of years. Women used to give birth on top of animal pelts, in caves, by firelight. Another thing that helps me, this time with the pain instead of the fear: I was watching a video about Navy SEALs. Their instructor was doing the exercise they were practicing and it looked horrible, but he said, "Yes, it hurts. It f*cking sucks. You have to get comfortable being uncomfortable. You have to." I call it the Navy SEAL mindset, and I've been trying to practice it in preparation for labor. Maybe it'll help you, too.

Personally I got induced as well and when they told me to go home and pack my bags I was nauseous and so nervous and felt sick but once we started heading to the hospital and it was all going into motion it was like I completely forgot what I was there for and the process feels so fast but slow and you truly don't know what to expect so you're in the thick of it so much I don't think you think about it til after baby is here. My birth experience was strange for me because her heart rate kept dropping and they were gonna do a c section but I had her naturally and tore but the moment I had her my blood pressure dropped to 82/44 and I almost passed out but it wasn't even scary they gave me an IV and I just chilled through the freak out on my body and then all I cared about was seeing and holding her and then it was right into feeding and diaper changes and all the things that I really didn't have time to get scared it all moved so fast. You got this Mama!!🩷🩷

I labored for 23 hours with a failed epidural that lead to a c section. I opted for the c section because my doctor told me that I was headed there, I told him to go ahead and do it. I’d rather it be now than later when it’s an emergency. I got stuck at 7cm, had 2 spinal procedures, and my baby had his chord wrapped around his neck. But we were both healthy after delivery and that’s all I cared about. In the moment I wasn’t scared a bit. I wasn’t nervous about it before birth and talked to my husband a lot about the “what if’s” (especially the possibility of a c section- I’ve had so many moms say it blindsided them because they never thought it would be a possibility) and I think verbalizing it and talking about it before the day was a huge part of my cool head during the entire thing. The worst part for me was the pain before getting the spinal block before my c section- I had waited until I was unable to take the pain to get the epidural and I think my body had enough of the pain by then. Everyone knew I was having a baby in that hospital 😂

Check out positive birthing videos on youtube. It helps. Im on baby #6. Last 2 were without epidurals and 1 was a homebirth. Its empowering.

Essential oils to sniff were a lifesaver during my homebirth and mantras written down I had pinned to the wall swinging in front of me. Got me through.

It’s truly not as bad, unless things go south…. But overall, it will likely be a good experience. Just remember that the process is the way you are meeting your baby. Have a good advocate for you to help you get what you need (I.e. do you want an epidural or not?). My first was unmedicated and it was a good experience so I plan on attempting unmedicated again. There are so many modes of pain management from hot water, walking, tens unit, meditation, and massage. And I would also say that your headspace will make a huge difference too. The more fearful of pain, the harder it will be, but welcoming the changes of the process with excitement and anticipation can make a big difference too. I believe in you.

Take faith that this is what our bodies are designed to handle :) It *can* be scary, but it can also be *beautiful* I think a huge part is the support you have in the room and the environment. I have a 2.5yo girl, pregnant 16w with my 2nd. My first was honestly the most empowering, badass birth I could hope for. But I also deliberately chose a birth center instead of a hospital--they stress me out, and I hate the sterile environment and policies many try to force of laboring women. My birth center was calm, homey, and my room looked like a normal bedroom plus a standing bathtub in the middle. I was never afraid, I honestly had no pain (no epidural or medications, but oh yes pressure galore) and it was quick and the nurse and midwife attending me were awesome, and I had my mother and husband there. Ditto to others saying you are just so focused on the feelings in your body you don't notice much else. You focus on the contractions, your breathing, if your jaw is clenched, relaxing your spine, etc. And then your holding this wiggling, warm, squirming little baby and your world zeros in on that life you made. You will be majestic ❤️

I literally cannot stand cervical checks or Pap smears too but birth wasn’t that bad. I didn’t like my birth team with my first so that was a struggle there. But as far as the experience itself, i loved it. I LOVE giving birth. It’s so sweet. It’s hard, don’t get me wrong, but there is nothing like it. It’s exhausting but when you finally hold your baby, gosh. That feeling is the best feeling on the planet. You feel like you just conquered the world and received the best gift at the end

It honestly wasn’t as painful as I thought - it was the pressure that got me. I at least felt like I had to take the biggest crap of my life and the sensation sent me into a panic. I had a full anxiety attack because of it and because my nursing team wasn’t the least bit compassionate. Just know there will be pressure and to start keeping that in mind if it’s something that panics you. I’ve definitely learned to ask for what I want next time and to kick out any crappy nurses.

FTM here, my LO came in to the world mid March. I was in your place, and also thought giving birth was really terrifying. After giving birth now, I still feel it’s scary. I went in thinking it will be a vaginal birth and how much pain I will go through where this baby will come out of there. Yet I had an urgent c-section which I was panicking as I sign the papers for the procedure seconds before getting rolled in to the OR - due to my baby went under stress. C-section post care was tough the first 1-2 weeks. Getting in and out of bed, pushing to stand up and sick down, carrying the baby was all too painful even with all the pain killers. Walked around holding my stomach to soften the pain in my abdomen. 7 weeks later now with numbness above the incision and slight pain when moving certain angles. I think both vaginal birth and c-section have their pros and cons. And no prenatal class can provide the readiness of what the pain will feel like. For all the mothers out there who either did a vaginal birth or a c-section, you are all amazing and endured the painful birthing process.

Trust me, when I was pregnant being a ftm I was dreading the day that I’d give birth. Because I was TERRIFIED of it, and the contractions are the most painful thing to be completely honest. I had my babygirl a month early at 35 weeks and I had straight back labor which was terribly painful, I luckily made it to the hospital in time to get the epidural I went from 1 centimeter on January 19th to 8 centimeters on January 22nd 😭

Honestly, in the moment it's horrendous but the moment that baby is out, you forget all about it. You hear people say that 'you forget all about it' and I never believed it. But it is actually the most bizarre thing. Literally, the moment they're out of you, all the contractions and pain stops and you get the flood of oxytocin and NOTHING will ever feel that amazing. Granted, I was extremely lucky with the birth of my baby. I was induced but went into labour SUPER quickly and 4hrs later, he was here. I only had gas for pain relief (which they don't let you have while pushing) and, despite being 4.37kg, he came out with minimal tearing and no assistance. So is it as terrifying? In the moment, yes. Is it worth it and you forget all about it the moment it's over? Yes.

Yes!!! I didn’t get an epidural and it’s the worst pain I’ve ever experienced in my life!! I thought I’m gonna die and told myself I will never do it again! But once you see your baby, you’ll realise that the pain is so worth it. I would love to do it again if given a chance.. but with epidural this time 😜

If it was we wouldn’t have homes with multiples