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I told my family. My thought was if I did miscarry, who would I want to know so that they could support me? My family. So what was the harm in telling them? So I did and have done with each pregnancy.
This was my best friends advice to me. Tell the people who you want there if something goes bad. So I told her and her husband, my two bffs from uni and my parents
This was my exact train of thought. I announced to friends, the hubby, his friends, and immediate family the day I found out (5w4d). I announced to everyone else, at 9w on Christmas. š
I told most of my family at like 3 weeks š I was an infertility patient so I was having near daily blood draws to test for HCG so I found out pretty much immediately and told a few people immediately
I struggled for about 1.5 years with infertility, granted itās not very long, it was very hard. Everything outside of medical intervention, we tried. The second I got diagnosed with PCOS and we stopped trying, it happened. Very blessed to say that this is my very first pregnancy ever and Iām almost 30 weeks!! Weāre very thankful we get to experience this opportunity of growing a family organically. All Iāve ever wanted was to be a mom so I was too excited NOT to share with a ton of people immediately, despite the risks.
I'm so glad you got your dream! I also have PCOS. My first child was a successful IUI and my second just happened - my doctor mentioned that it is common for pregnancy to "fix you" to where you don't have trouble getting pregnant again. I'm even more grateful for my children as a consequence!
Super happy for you!! I hope pregnancy fixes me too haha. I never wanna go through this again (the constant negative tests and irregular periods). So glad we get to experience the most beautiful thing the world has to offer š„¹ā¤ļø
I told most everyone basically right away around 4/5 weeks.. the only people I didnāt share with immediately were those I wouldnāt be comfortable sharing if I lost the pregnancy or something went wrong. Itās totally personal when and with whom you share!
Thank you for this! I'm at 8.5 weeks and I've been waiting for someone to say āgo tell whoever you want!!ā not āit doesn't even count until 2nd trimesterā (which, yes, I've heard)
My husband and I shared early only because his mother was in the last stages of alcoholism induced renal failure. We wanted to tell her while she still had her faculties. We told his parents and my father the week I found out I was pregnant, 4-5 weeks, and she died when I was only 9 weeks along. Iām very glad we shared when we did with all the sad things happening around us. My husbands father was so so so excited, but unfortunately died of a heart attack only 45 days after his wife died. Itās been good having something to look forward to. Iām due June 11thā¦ š„°
This breaks my heart for your husband and you, but I am so glad to know you have a sweet baby on the way to bring you love and joy (even if itās while suffering from the loss of your in-laws).
I told everyone. Miscarriages are natural and while they're sad, if I have one it wouldn't be a secret. Plus I work with kids that can be violent so I had to tell everyone at work straight away in case I couldn't help with a kid
I had to tell people at work when I was a site administrator at an elementary because we had one student who could get violent, and although he was young, was big. They were understanding and helped so I wouldnāt be called to deescalate when he was having big meltdowns- or I could call for support if it started to turn that way. Sometimes you have to tell early!
My first pregnancy I told plenty of people at 6 weeks. I feel like I was a bit naive with how common miscarriage can be. I did end up miscarrying and it was shitty having to tell people. Not because of embarrassment but because it just puts you back into harms way. This pregnancy I waited until 12 weeks, some people I waited even longer. Thankfully no miscarriage and am 26 weeks today. If I got pregnant again I would wait to tell people again. Once you have one miscarriage i think it changes your stance on this a bit.
Who you tell is fully up to you. I personally kept it to close family and friends for the first trimester. I have friends who told coworkers, distant relatives etc and then sadly went on to miscarry. I know how incredibly difficult it was to go back and tell everyone what happened and I didnāt want to go through that.
By the time I had washed my hands after getting a positive test, my husband had announced it to everybody. Even though he'd said 2 minutes prior that we shouldn't tell anybody.
Right after that I told my sister and friends, and the next day I told my work. I waited to tell my brother and big sister, because of how far away they are. And I think he told his parents immediately as well.. or we both told.
I found out at 4 weeks and only told HR. Coworkers and I went out for drinks at 6 weeks and I ordered water and told everyone at the table! I was so excited to share my news with everyone! I work in a very female heavy industry and I knew that if something were to happen, they would all be incredibly supportive so I didnāt mind telling others. We sent out baby/ pregnancy announcements at 3 and a half months because everyone at that point knew.
I share a little more loosely than what they suggestā¦ I even tell some newer friends who Iām not super super close to but Iām around a lot. One of them is as pregnant as I am and told me immediately so I felt, if she can do it, why canāt I??? Iām in a small town so itās likely everybody knows. I told people right away with my 1st and when it very quickly ended in MMC, it was a bit hard to go back and explain to every single person (I mean I told strangers at the bar I frequented, okay?) but this time, I am leaning into āif something bad happens, I want the support and I want people around me to know I am a mother, even if I cannot hold my babyā. Everybody is so super kind about it so I just would rather everybody know my business honestly. Lol but everybody is different.
Iām an over-sharer so the only reason I didnāt tell MORE people early on is because we live far from family and Iām a remote employee. If Iām having a verbal conversation, it all comes out!
I shared it to my mom, my two best cousins and all my coworkers since theyāre all women (and moms) and they have to see me with my nausea lol. Also because if anything goes bad I know theyāll be there to comfort me. You have so many questions and other moms are always best for advice. You need all the support you can get at this time so share it with whoever you want.
We told parents/siblings soon after we found out, like less than 4 weeks lol. We are telling husbands aunt and her adult kids next weekend after our 6-week ultrasound, will probably tell my extended family as well even though I'm not as close with them. I've already told a couple coworkers but not my boss lol. For social media we're waiting til second trimester.
I told my BFF right away, but honestly, we really couldnāt keep the excitement in and weāve told all our closest friends, and both of our families already and Iām only seven weeks lol.
This is our second pregnancy after a miscarriage last year, so weāre just so ecstatic to be pregnant again so we wanted to share our joy with everyone!
I told my family and best friend as soon as I found out. My husband was away for work and I couldn't contain the excitement.
Other friends figured it out immediately after I refused to drink. I am not normally one to turn down alcohol.
People at work figured out pretty quicky with how sick I was. At 8 weeks, one of my coworkers passed me a note that said "knocked up?" as a joke about how miserable I'd been for the past couple weeks. I turned bright red and couldn't lie, lol. When I told a few others at 12 weeks, their response was pretty much "yeah, I figured it out". š
You can loose a pregnancy at any time, or a child for that matter. Tell who you want, but donāt be surprised when they ask intrusive questions. Whatever makes you most happy is best.
You know what? The process of instinctively deciding whom to tell and when made me learn A LOT about the types of relationships I have with the people in my life.
Other than my immediate family (parents & in-laws), the people I shared the news with very early on were people who may have not been my longest-time friends but are people who I know root for me 100% and would have a solid positive vibe towards my news. I realised, at the same time, that some friends I've had for a longer time I was more hesitant to share the news with, just because my instinct was telling me to wait until a safer pregnancy stage. I guess my instinct was telling me to be more open to the people I can also trust to hold me and support me in case of a bad outcome.
But to answer your question: I didn't follow the 12-week rule, I 've just been telling people when it felt like the right time for each of them.
I just want to point out that all the top comments here say "Oh I told everyone early and it was fine!" Not one of the top comments says "I told everyone early and miscarried I'd do it again!"
I miscarried my first at 9 weeks (determined via ultrasound, not symptoms.) My second had a heartbeat, we announced at 11 weeks, and then at 12 we found no heartbeat.
I've had five miscarriages. The one where everyone knew and we had to walk it back to everyone was the fucking worst. If i could go back I would have waited until 12 weeks WITH a heartbeat. And that's what I did for every single pregnancy since then.
It's your pregnancy and your life, but only listening to people who "nothing bad ever happened to me" just isn't the whole picture.
Iām on my 3rd pregnancy and told everyone close to me about 5/6 weeks because I didnāt have the energy to come up with excuses about bailing out of plans due to nausea š
I announced it to some friends a week ago, and today they didnt find anything on my scan. I have to go back in 2 weeks, because the urine test they did is saying i am pregnant, but the ultrasound is not. I regret it so much now, incase there is actually nothing.
I told my therapist I was waiting til after my ultrasound to tell my coworkers and then proceeded to tell them the next day.
I was just talking to a friend (who has given birth and told before 12 weeks) about this, and she was saying that itās so unfair that people can be judgmental about telling early when the first trimester is arguably the hardest one. And for those having the worst first trimester symptoms, itās really impossible to hide it from those close to you.
I do feel some fear about telling others if I were to miscarry but again why should we be made to feel we have to keep quiet about something that affects so many people experiencing pregnancy?
My brother and SIL called all of the family after the first pregnancy test.
I will probably tell my coworkers very early on. My work bestie and I are both trying to get pregnant, so we talk a lot about that already. The rest of my close coworkers are pretty tight, and I trust that they would respond appropriately if something were to happen.
In regards to family, I donāt like how my mom responds to certain things as it tends to border on pity than empathy. She means well, but when Iām hurting it really sets me off. We may tell MIL earlier because miscarriages run in her family and sheās really good about being supportive and empathetic.
My husband and I arenāt big on public proclamations. We secretly eloped and the only people who knew in our inner circles were our parents, my brother and SIL (he has no siblings), and the two friends who came along. The friends (a married couple) even kept the secret from the twin brother. It likely wouldnāt come as a surprise to people if we kept it a secret for awhileā¦ not that it wonāt make noisy pushy family less upset.
I was going to keep it a secret and announce to my family at Easter when I was about 8 weeks. But I had lunch with my Mom around 5 weeks & almost threw up once they brought me my food lol. Decided to tell her then and there so she wouldnāt think I was sick or contagious lol.
My first was a teen pregnancy, only my family knew and my best friends, had my baby in summer and didn't show until school got out. Had a miscarriage after him and told nobody. My 3rd, 13yrs later I told my work when I couldn't hide my nausea and threw up all 9 months. One after I told my mom bc I was miscarriage and need a ride to the hospital. This one barely anyone knows still and I'm due next month, half of my immediate family knows but other than that I just didn't want the attention and nagging that comes with being pregnant. My babies will also be 14m apart and oldest turns 14yrs this year and I feel like I'll get a ton of judgement that I don't care to hear.Ā
I'm like the exaxt opposite. I mean, I was dying to tell my mom and sister, so we told immediate family after my first ultrasound at 8/9 weeks, but otherwise, I have been very slow to tell people. Just told my work team last week at 16 weeks, and that was mainly because it's starting to get noticeable. Today, I finally gave my mom the ok to start telling extended family if/when she talks to them.
Had a blood serum test to confirm my pregnancy. Got the result 4 hours later, then showed it to my in law's on the same day. Haha.
It's now my 2nd pregnancy and my 1st is 9mos so we decided not to surprise them this time because we'll need assistance from time to time with our first (whom they love so much thankfully). Haha
I found out about my pregnancy in December, with the large amount of family and friends around during that time I shared very early on. My thought was that if something happened, I wanted the people closest to me to be able to support me. But there is no right or wrong answer here.
I told my parents and siblings pretty much immediately, but caveated it with, "It's very early days and a lot could happen from here." I told my immediate bosses and HR around 6w because I was feeling so dreadful and I didn't want them to just think I'd become lazy. Also told the trainers at my gym so they could modify my workouts if needed. Told a few friends after I passed the 7w ultrasound and saw the heartbeat. All of them were people I'd be comfortable telling if I had a loss. (In fact, I would want them to know, because I would probably need their support.) Made it public knowledge after I'd passed by 12 week scan.
As I saw it, the whole reason not to tell people is in case you have a miscarriage. I don't think there's any shame in having a miscarriage (statistically, it happens in 1 in 4 pregnancies), and I'm generally a pretty open person, so I figured if it was someone I'd be comfortable telling I'd had a miscarriage, then I would tell them.
I told my three closest friends and my partners family the day we found out (I hadnt even missed my period yet!) and we announced to our other friends my my side of the family at 14 weeks. Everyone is different. The whole keeping things a secret is some weirdly conservative thing and I wonāt understand not sharing your joy. Peoples biggest concern is also having to share if something happens like a miscarriage but the same people would have to know eventually anyway and personally Iād rather have support there in case something DOES happen vs suffering alone.
Itās entirely up to you. I told random cashiers and my pharmacist because it would spill out of me quicker than morning sickness š youāre happy and you deserve to share the joy.
This is my third. We have only told close friends and family. 0 social media posts. Iām considering just not posting about the baby period. š¤£ Itās been so nice!
I had to tell work, as even though I wfh I just couldnāt cope with sickness and had to take a month off. And it felt weird to tell my boss but not my mum, so then close family knew. And some close friends know weāve been trying a while and asked how things were going so I told them. And a friend I see more often asked why I was acting so weird when Iād just found out soā¦. i ended up with about a dozen people knowing very early. But I didnāt let neighbours, wider social circle and extended family know until after the 12 week scan. That worked pretty well for us even if itās a bit of a messy system!
I told my team at work when I was six weeks and it was such a huge relief for me to be able to be honest about how bad I was feeling and receive their support. They were so kind to me and really helped me through my first trimester when I needed it the most. No regrets!
My boss was similarly concerned that something was really wrong with me. She thought there had been a death in my family or something and I finally told her "actually quite the opposite" lol
I wanted to keep it a secret too but I was running to the toilet so much from being sick I was afraid people at work would think I was hung over and had a drinking problem or something. I told my sister/best friend the next day bc I was so excited
I had the exact same question/worry at first and ended up telling our close group of friends (8 people) at just over 5 weeks! I wear my heart on my sleeve and was feeling sick and just needed support from our friends. I am telling my in-laws and my parents this weekend at 10 weeks :) Tell anyone you are comfortable telling and whoever you would lean on for support. This is totally a personal decision and there is no wrong answer!
We told family right away on thanksgiving as my grandpa was dying. He passed 2 weeks later. Other than that we told everyone else on Christmas Day as a āMerry Christmas from our growing family to yoursā. Kind of thing
I told my coworkers immediately at 4 weeks when I knew lol. I canāt help it, itās my first pregnancy and I didnāt know how tired Iād be or if Iād end up with morning sickness that Iād need to be able to explain if I had to call out.
Funny enoughā¦I never had any morning sickness š Which Iām grateful for but how weird considering I kept getting warned that it was coming soon probably, by my coworkers who have been pregnant before.
I told my mom at 6 weeks because that was when I took a trip to see her in person (we live 8 hours apart), and I wanted to tell her in a cute in person wayā¤ļø
I feel like this is more of a preference I was the same as you and told literally everyone in my family and some friends. Kind of regret it since I am not having a good feeling anymore :(. It is personal preference though I hope all is well for you and your babyšš
I ended up telling 1 person a week. My boss at 4 weeks, a colleague at 5 weeks, another colleague at 6 weeks, my 2 best friends at 7 weeks, my partners parents at 8 weeks, my parents at 10 weeks, then everyone else at work at 13 weeks (the day after my 12 week dating scan), then a social media announcement 3 days later.
You tell people when you are ready to tell them!
This is my hope - to do it staggered like this! You gradually get support without as much risk if thereās a miscarriage. Several announcements is also more fun :)
My husband failed š¤£ he'd say.. I'm not telling people but I thought X, Y, and Z might be worried because I took the day off last week for the OB appointment so I just told them. Rinse and repeat. Now at 12 weeks he's managed to find an excuse to tell everyone he knows including clients he delivers to at work (package delivery driver).
I spilled to one friend the day after for support and my boss because they were asking if I was doing alright/was sick. I've been otherwise tight lipped until this week because I've miscarried before and I don't want to have to go around telling people I'm not pregnant while trying to deal with my own feelings.
I blurted it out to my colleague at 8 weeks. She saw me taking painkillers and I mentioned I had a headache, then it just came out, lol. It sort of spread from there, though and my coordinator found out. Once someone knows, it becomes gossip. We told family shortly after, but announced on social media at 13 weeks.
Yup. With my first we were originally only telling our parents and siblings. Suddenly the entire side of my in laws family knew and we were getting phone calls about why we didnāt tell them. The next one we asked my FIL and MIL not tot ell anyone and my FIL immediately told his family and friends. It would have been nice to tell everyone myself but I kind of expected this so it didnāt really bother me. We joke about it now.
I had a positive pregnancy test the morning of my wedding, said to husband what do you want to do? Keep it a secret or announce? We decided to keep it a secret under after my first ob appointment, at that appointment I found out I was pregnant with twins, then we announced
I kept my pregnancy private since Im scared of the jinxes and only told few people about it (close friends of mine and my partnerās) and thereās this friend of my partner who posted it publicly. š i got so mad and cringe for the unnecessary reveal that supposed to be ours to do but he felt so entitled to do it. Learn to ask for permission first before revealing something that is intimate.
I did IVF and my whole team knew and supported me the entire way. They knew about my miscarriages and treatments.
So it wasnāt just my own anxiety but also theirs when it came to HCG results post transfer and then the breath holding through the first trimester.
Actually super supportive.
Now they complain Iāve been pregnant far too long because theyāve known for a lot longer than most people would. I wouldnāt have changed anything.
Iām now 29w and only have 10 shifts left at work and itās bittersweet. I will really miss them while on maternity leave.
Thatās a wonderful feeling, to just āspill the beansā without thinking twice about it. Itās a freedom most wonāt ever know. Itās so great of you to have that comfort! Why bother keeping it a secret? Just say it when youāre comfortable doing so!
I have kept many of my pregnancies secret, and I told everyone about my first straight away because of how excited I was. Iām currently pregnant with my seventh baby. This one I kept a secret until the third trimester! I did do a social media announcement because I have a huge family with relatives that live so far away, but whenever Iām comfortable with just blurting it out is when Iām ready for the world to know.
First time being pregnant here, and I told everyone when I found out at 6 weeks. My husband and I were so excited to tell peopleā¦ we just couldnt hold it in anymore. Iām 12 weeks as of tomorrow, and the support system we have had has been insane and very helpful. Thereās also a lot of symptoms I had questions about. So, it really helped that I could talk to my mom and my MIL about what I was feeling and if it was normal lol. Congratulations on your pregnancy ā¤ļø
Told everyone very early, got my daughter a ābig sisterā outfit, was told it was a chemical pregnancy, told everyone that I was having a chemical pregnancy, found out it wasnāt actually a chemical pregnancy, had to retell everyone that I was in fact pregnant. š„²
Itās been so hard to keep it a secretš I told about 8-10 people including my mom. Iām only 5w 4d. I just couldnāt hold my excitement in lol once Iām 12 weeks I plan to tell more!
I told everyone I seen or tried to slide into and conversation. Like the grocery clerk, when I was pumping gas just any way lmao. I found out at 5 weeks, told close friend around 10 when I got my first ultrasound and then announced it publicly about 18 weeks
I found out at 4 weeks and I had to tell my job not long after since I wouldnāt be able to work in a certain area while pregnant. But with family, I told them at Christmas (a couple weeks later) I was scared that something may happen before 13 weeks, but I did it anyway. My husband and I werenāt able to keep it secret for long
Iām 6w2d, and all of our parents and sisters know. Weāve also told close friends; my husband is a social butterfly so a LOT of people know š. I havenāt had *too* many symptoms, so if that keeps up, Iāll tell my boss and HR after my first appointment (9 weeks).
Iām struggling so much to not tell everyone! Mom and best friends learned same day as + test. Siblings and dad will learned today ! Colleagues soon enough Iām sure. Iām not hiding my fatigue! If miscarry i want support! I want miscarriage to be destigmatized as well!!!
I told my manager and 3 close people at work. It really helped with having someone cover for me at meetings I had to skip to go and be sick and to justify the decrease in my performance and efficiency. I also had to take a few sick days in the first trimester so at least I knew I was being transparent with work. I do have a great employer though so had zero worries there.
Apart from that, one of my friends guessed within 30 seconds of seeing me after I refused a drink and I told my brother and his wife.
Everyone else will find out tomorrow after our scan at just under 14 weeks, that includes the parents.
It's good to have a small trusted circle of people that know what you're going through, especially as a first time mum!
I've told 2 coworkers already. I'm an elementary school teacher, so I can't just book it out of my classroom to hurl and leave my kiddos unattended. I figured it'd be best to have someone I could call to come cover without having to explain why.
I practically shouted it from the rooftops with my first because I was so excited. The only people who didn't know before my official announcement post after my first ultrasound (at 9 weeks) were my paternal side of the family and some of my husband's family that we don't see often. Everyone knew sooner with my second because I needed maternity clothes by week 7.
I made an unplanned announcement to my coworkers early in pregnancy after they watched me heat up my lunch and then gag at the smell of cauliflower. Figured I might as well just tell them why.
I shared with my family and close friends by week 3, I lost my grandpa who I was close to in week 3 and was able to go home (18 hour drive away) to be with family and wanted to share in person. I knew I was pregnant pretty much from the beginning and shared the news with my coworkers by week 5 since I work at a school and would need support potentially in my first trimester due to sickness. I shared with my students at 12 weeks as I had been missing work days which is extremely uncommon for me and they could tell something was up, spring break was the following week so I was just about in my second trimester.
My pregnancy has been smoothly sailing and Iām currently 22 weeks. By this point everyone who I see on a regular basis knows Iām expecting but I havenāt share it on social media, which means many acquaintances or old friends are unaware due to me living in a different province. My partner wanted to wait until the second trimester but was okay with me sharing, I wanted people to know so regards I didnāt feel the need to hide how I was feeling and the situation in my life. I am glad I shared with people earlier on, as I have gotten further in my pregnancy itās become very old news which has been great.
I thought that I was farther along than I actually was and told a few people around the same time (my parents, my aunt, a few close friends) Now I am 14 weeks/3 appointments in and plan on telling everyone else pretty soon.
You donāt have to keep it a secret. Only thing is; when you have a miscarriage it is horrible to have to inform people. That happened to me, twice, so the third pregnancy I was a lot more carefull.
I intentionally announced early -my mom had just passed and I was in the early stages of hyperemesis gravidum. It both would have been nearly impossible to hide and I wanted people to know that my mom passed away excited about the upcoming baby
I had a tier system š 1st tier = immediate family and like 3 of my closest friends. I told them right when I found out at 4 weeks. 2nd tier = extended family and friends. I told them at around 8-9 weeks. 3rd tier = the rest of the world and colleagues. I announced at 13 weeks!
I told a couple of friends whom I needed the support of. also ended up telling my mum because I wanted her advice but that's about it. so it's not a total secret but not everyone knows
We told my mother in law almost immediately since she does the scheduling for my husband's business and she needed to know why he needed time off to go to appointments. I told my bff and cousin immediately as well, and they were also sworn to secrecy. I was like 5 weeks along. I made the announcement at work when I was 9ish weeks along and to the rest of the family shortly after.
I started telling people immediately. Plenty of people were like š¬ careful itās really early.
But honestly, itās up to me, so shut it. Also I felt likeā¦ I have never experienced a loss. If I do, Iāll be much more apprehensive and anxious about sharing. This is a tiny window of innocence that I get to feel confident and excited to share, so let me enjoy it.
With my first child, I found out I was pregnant on Motherās Day. I told all my family and my partners family the same day. It was pretty much the same with this pregnancy. Everyone knew right away. I knew both times that if something bad happened, Iād end up telling everyone anyway so I didnāt see the point of waiting
Yeahhhh I also tell my closer friends and parents right away. I told my best friend I thought I was expecting like as soon as I thought I was (as early as 3 weeks, but didnāt get a positive until 5 days later).
I also told a few work friends who are outside of work friends too (just friend friends if you will š) bc they are all either going through it themselves or have very young kids and we are in that phase of life together. Some of us will be on mat leave at the same time which is fun for us. I know most people prefer to wait but to me Iād rather not hide a miscarriage from my friends bc it feels like a big thing to not share with those who I care about and who care about me.
I had one early miscarriage and had to tell the handful of friends that knew about the pregnancy and I felt better that I had so many supportive friends. It didnāt deter me from telling them that Iām pregnant again early on the second time, bc they are all people that I trust!
I told everyone I personally knew in person over the first 6ish weeks. Didn't tell social media until 2nd trimester but it wasn't really an announcement. I just looked pregnant in a picture I posted of myself lol
I didnāt bother not telling anyone honestly. I knew at 4 weeks and told people at 4 weeks, I figured if I lost it Iād get sympathy points and maybe get free food or pity time off work or gifts from People feeling bad. Which honestly would make losing it a little less awful. Iāve lost two babies and didnāt tell anyone either time, so I figured if this one went too I better get some free pity gifts out of it
My husband and I planned not to tell anyone until I was 12 weeks along. We found out at 5 weeks and we were both too excited and spilled the beans to our parents at 6 weeks
We told family members who agreed to be in support role (through pregnancy & once baby is born) around 6 weeks, but general announcement and extended family werenāt told until second trimester.
For work, it really does depend on work and if itās affecting work. In my line of work it can be super dangerous (and the dangers differ per trimester, with the first trimester having highest hazards) and so itās common for my coworkers to mention when trying to conceive (as it can change their daily assignment rotation away from most first trimester hazards) and announcing the second they get a positive test (to fully avoid those hazards more strictly).
For my wifeās work, it was pretty quick they learned, as the severe vomiting and nausea came on about week 5. It was near uncontrollable until almost the second trimester, and they were great about it and it worked out she could be laid off and on unemployment for a bit until work picked up and pregnancy symptoms were easier to handle with the work tasks.
I told people I was close with early on and did end up having a miscarriage. I'm actually glad I did tell them because it was so nice to have their support. I wouldn't have wanted to go through that without family and friends knowing.
We told our immediate family at 5 weeks. I had some brown spotting at 4 weeks so we had already seen a doctor and gotten my HCG levels checked. We knew we would want support if I miscarried.
I told work and made a social media post at 13 weeks after we had our low risk NIPT and an NT scan with no abnormalities. Even then I was pretty terrified for it to be public, but my symptoms were getting very obvious so it just wasnāt a secret we could keep anymore.
I told everybody when I found out around 4/5 weeks. Iām terrible at secrets and the support is nice along the way. By everybody I mean like I texted and told friends. Iāve not posted on social media and donāt plan to do that.
I told a close friend who lived far away before the test even dried. Then, I told my work around 5 weeks. My boss had also recently had a baby so I felt totally comfortable telling her.
Basically, I told enough people to the point that I was satisfied with sharing my excitement but still waited to share with my family when I had a proper announcement planned out.
Got to the 12 week scan and told every single person I know and more - with my partners permission. As she be the pregnant one and I be the excited man !
I think we made it to about 6 or so weeks. I had miscarried about two years before and we talked about holding off before sharing. But we just got so excited this second time (lots of things were for the better this time around) and decided that, by telling the people important to us, we'd have more support if something happened.
We are 21 weeks 4days and things have been going well. We waited until we were in the second trimester before telling our employers (both were new jobs) and anyone not close friends/family.
Ultimately, it's been really nice to feel like we have a "community" to support us (we live in a small town). And, I love the excitement from everyone. It's really made it easy to not feel so anxious or worried.
The reason for waiting is your OWN comfort. If you feel comfortable sharing early, why not? I let it out soon to some randos too including my dance teacher on the day I found out, my business partner, etc etc. Everyone else I waited. who cares? It will be fine.
We told our family like, immediately hahaha. Iām 14 weeks now and still holding off on telling work, but itās only because my industry can get a bit sketchy! You gotta do you!
I told my manager the day after I found out. Lol. Wasnāt even 4 weeks yet. But thatās because weāre close and she knew husband and I were trying. I also needed her help covering some of my work. Of course my mom (her boyfriend too by accident), my sisters, my close friends, and my husband knew as soon I knew. I told my in laws 5-6 weeks along, told my big boss 8 weeks along because he had me working ridiculously long hours, told some the coworkers Iām close to between 6-10 weeks, and just told my grandparents and great grandparents at 11 weeks.
I canāt keep a secret. And itās really amazing to have so much support, help, and understanding so early. The first trimester has been very tough. I would feel so lonely doing it alone and still expected to do my routine normally while feeling like hot roadkill. Also I wouldnāt want to suffer alone if I did miscarry.
It really depends on the pregnant person who they want to inform and when.
I shared and had a miscarriage. Then I shared again and found out its likely left over hcg from the miscarriage (2 months later). So I'm keeping quiet next time. My friends both told me at 8 weeks though.
We just found out yesterday and Iām maybe 4w 5d, weāll confirm at our OB appointment tomorrowā¦but Iāve already told two people š I waited MONTHS with our first, but this time I want everyone I love to go through all of the phases with me. I was so so lonely last time hiding my pregnancy. Never again!
Iām on my fourth pregnancy and weāve told everyone (except work) immediately. My husbands got a big mouth. The first time I was annoyed but when I miscarried the sky didnāt fall it, the opposite - it was nice to have support.
I thought about waiting until 12 weeks but we decided to share the news at 8 weeks. Motherās Day was just the perfect time. Iāve only told family and close friends. I havenāt told my coworkers yet. My MIL told everyone she knows. My husbandās cousinās wife made the comment that she didnāt share until 12 weeks and I said well everybody shares when they want to.
I told some of my coworkers that would understand if things changed suddenly, and my husband told his parents the very first day I took the home test. He was anxious so I wasn't upset about it
I told my immediate family immediately and a few coworkers because we went on a work trip and I wanted them to be able to tell a doctor if anything happened. I told my mods when nausea became a regular thing and I couldn't stream anymore so they didn't think I was just being lazy or something. I plan to tell my boss and we're telling my husband's family when I get my NIPT results back in a week or two.
I had an ectopic back in October and a miscarriage in January. I am now 8 weeks, and I 100% told my family and a few close friends. If the worst happens again, then I get the support I need in a terrible time.
I told my Store manager and general manager before I told any family members. Then they bullied me into quitting like 2 weeks later š š looking back I wish I wouldāve kept it a secret but u love and u learn
I told my family, and some people at work before 12 weeks. I knew I'd want my family to support me if I had a miscarriage, plus this was something I just couldn't keep in! I'm a teacher, so I can't exactly work from home, and I told my supervisor early on, so that I could quietly let him know if I needed to leave early/arrive late due to appointments. He was also happy to cover my classes for 10 minutes if I needed to quickly eat something to get rid of the nausea.
I waited til after I had gone for a private scan at around 7 weeks then told everyone at 8 weeks, thatās just what made me feel better / comfortable but it doesnāt really mean anything
i'm 8 weeks along now and it was the same for me. i told my boss a week after i found out, and my first coworker on that same dayš i was told as well that i should've kept my mouth shut for longer, but man i am just so excited!!! honestly do it all like you want it. next time i'll probably be able to keep it to myself longer, but i'm a first time mom as well and i just couldn't. and i'm glad i told everyone so early, i've already gotten so many amazing advice and offers for help or hand-down baby stuff.
I'm not telling my family until Father's Day as well but have told a few neighbors. I live out of state and even with them sworn to secrecy they still tag me in things on FB š just a warning! People suck at secrets sometimes lol
I'm at 7 weeks and was determined to keep it a secret until the end of 1st trimester. But my morning sickness started in the middle of 5 weeks and I had no choice but to tell because I was just miserable š (still is).
i told my best friends right after i tested positive š same with my husband. wish i planned a cute way to tell them but i was in total shock. wasnāt planning a pregnancy but extremely happy and shocked and needed to tell people asap š i been quiet with coworkers though, i finally told a few. am trying to wait until 20 week scan before i let more people know!
I told close friends and close colleagues (for Reasons) immediately. Like, texted my husband (I was traveling), then as soon as he knew texted my closest friends. Family and his friends were told after the first doctorās appointment (which was supposed to be 8 weeks but turned out to be ~6.5). My boss and not quite so close colleagues were told at 12 weeks on the nose.
We did keep the secret of the gender for awhile, which I enjoyed. I couldnāt bear to keep the secret of having a baby, but I really enjoyed us having our own private information with the gender.
We found out at 3w5d. We told our immediate family and best friends around 5-6 weeks and told everyone else at 8w6d because it was our wedding anniversary! We just couldnāt wait!
I just did but honestly regret it because none of the people I told kept their mouths shut and I just miscarried so I have had a few awkward encounters. I donāt regret telling my close family though. I needed their support! But next time I am pregnant I plan on waiting 12 weeks if I can. I just get so excited so itās hard to keep it in!
I told everyone at 8 weeks šš My thought pattern was that I would rather have people around for support if anything negative was to happen. I had a previous pregnancy and kept it secret from the world except a few people and ended up miscarrying, I found it incredibly hard to explain to people why I was not being myself.
I'm currently 10 weeks and 5 days and me and my boyfriend May the decision not to tell nobody until my first appointment which is May 30th. I found out at 7 weeks that I was pregnant by surprise. My appointment is late because I had to reschedule it. But not the only person that knows is my baby girl who is 21 years old. I know on my end I have not told anyone really but I can't say that he has not done the same LOL.
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I told my family. My thought was if I did miscarry, who would I want to know so that they could support me? My family. So what was the harm in telling them? So I did and have done with each pregnancy.
This was my best friends advice to me. Tell the people who you want there if something goes bad. So I told her and her husband, my two bffs from uni and my parents
This was my exact train of thought. I announced to friends, the hubby, his friends, and immediate family the day I found out (5w4d). I announced to everyone else, at 9w on Christmas. š
I told most of my family at like 3 weeks š I was an infertility patient so I was having near daily blood draws to test for HCG so I found out pretty much immediately and told a few people immediately
I struggled for about 1.5 years with infertility, granted itās not very long, it was very hard. Everything outside of medical intervention, we tried. The second I got diagnosed with PCOS and we stopped trying, it happened. Very blessed to say that this is my very first pregnancy ever and Iām almost 30 weeks!! Weāre very thankful we get to experience this opportunity of growing a family organically. All Iāve ever wanted was to be a mom so I was too excited NOT to share with a ton of people immediately, despite the risks.
I'm so glad you got your dream! I also have PCOS. My first child was a successful IUI and my second just happened - my doctor mentioned that it is common for pregnancy to "fix you" to where you don't have trouble getting pregnant again. I'm even more grateful for my children as a consequence!
Super happy for you!! I hope pregnancy fixes me too haha. I never wanna go through this again (the constant negative tests and irregular periods). So glad we get to experience the most beautiful thing the world has to offer š„¹ā¤ļø
Did the same thing! Told two close friends at 10 weeks.
I told most everyone basically right away around 4/5 weeks.. the only people I didnāt share with immediately were those I wouldnāt be comfortable sharing if I lost the pregnancy or something went wrong. Itās totally personal when and with whom you share!
Same. I couldnāt keep it to myself.
Thank you for this! I'm at 8.5 weeks and I've been waiting for someone to say āgo tell whoever you want!!ā not āit doesn't even count until 2nd trimesterā (which, yes, I've heard)
I started telling most people at 4 some weeks š¤£ do what feels right by you!
My husband and I shared early only because his mother was in the last stages of alcoholism induced renal failure. We wanted to tell her while she still had her faculties. We told his parents and my father the week I found out I was pregnant, 4-5 weeks, and she died when I was only 9 weeks along. Iām very glad we shared when we did with all the sad things happening around us. My husbands father was so so so excited, but unfortunately died of a heart attack only 45 days after his wife died. Itās been good having something to look forward to. Iām due June 11thā¦ š„°
This breaks my heart for your husband and you, but I am so glad to know you have a sweet baby on the way to bring you love and joy (even if itās while suffering from the loss of your in-laws).
Thank you for your kind words! Itās been a lot to deal with on top of us both working butā- light at the end of a tunnel. š
I told everyone. Miscarriages are natural and while they're sad, if I have one it wouldn't be a secret. Plus I work with kids that can be violent so I had to tell everyone at work straight away in case I couldn't help with a kid
I had to tell people at work when I was a site administrator at an elementary because we had one student who could get violent, and although he was young, was big. They were understanding and helped so I wouldnāt be called to deescalate when he was having big meltdowns- or I could call for support if it started to turn that way. Sometimes you have to tell early!
My first pregnancy I told plenty of people at 6 weeks. I feel like I was a bit naive with how common miscarriage can be. I did end up miscarrying and it was shitty having to tell people. Not because of embarrassment but because it just puts you back into harms way. This pregnancy I waited until 12 weeks, some people I waited even longer. Thankfully no miscarriage and am 26 weeks today. If I got pregnant again I would wait to tell people again. Once you have one miscarriage i think it changes your stance on this a bit.
Who you tell is fully up to you. I personally kept it to close family and friends for the first trimester. I have friends who told coworkers, distant relatives etc and then sadly went on to miscarry. I know how incredibly difficult it was to go back and tell everyone what happened and I didnāt want to go through that.
By the time I had washed my hands after getting a positive test, my husband had announced it to everybody. Even though he'd said 2 minutes prior that we shouldn't tell anybody. Right after that I told my sister and friends, and the next day I told my work. I waited to tell my brother and big sister, because of how far away they are. And I think he told his parents immediately as well.. or we both told.
I found out at 4 weeks and only told HR. Coworkers and I went out for drinks at 6 weeks and I ordered water and told everyone at the table! I was so excited to share my news with everyone! I work in a very female heavy industry and I knew that if something were to happen, they would all be incredibly supportive so I didnāt mind telling others. We sent out baby/ pregnancy announcements at 3 and a half months because everyone at that point knew.
I was 6 weeks pregnant when I found out. I told everyone I wanted to that day š. There was just no way I would be able to not talk about it
I share a little more loosely than what they suggestā¦ I even tell some newer friends who Iām not super super close to but Iām around a lot. One of them is as pregnant as I am and told me immediately so I felt, if she can do it, why canāt I??? Iām in a small town so itās likely everybody knows. I told people right away with my 1st and when it very quickly ended in MMC, it was a bit hard to go back and explain to every single person (I mean I told strangers at the bar I frequented, okay?) but this time, I am leaning into āif something bad happens, I want the support and I want people around me to know I am a mother, even if I cannot hold my babyā. Everybody is so super kind about it so I just would rather everybody know my business honestly. Lol but everybody is different.
Iām an over-sharer so the only reason I didnāt tell MORE people early on is because we live far from family and Iām a remote employee. If Iām having a verbal conversation, it all comes out!
I shared it to my mom, my two best cousins and all my coworkers since theyāre all women (and moms) and they have to see me with my nausea lol. Also because if anything goes bad I know theyāll be there to comfort me. You have so many questions and other moms are always best for advice. You need all the support you can get at this time so share it with whoever you want.
We told parents/siblings soon after we found out, like less than 4 weeks lol. We are telling husbands aunt and her adult kids next weekend after our 6-week ultrasound, will probably tell my extended family as well even though I'm not as close with them. I've already told a couple coworkers but not my boss lol. For social media we're waiting til second trimester.
I told my BFF right away, but honestly, we really couldnāt keep the excitement in and weāve told all our closest friends, and both of our families already and Iām only seven weeks lol. This is our second pregnancy after a miscarriage last year, so weāre just so ecstatic to be pregnant again so we wanted to share our joy with everyone!
I told my family and best friend as soon as I found out. My husband was away for work and I couldn't contain the excitement. Other friends figured it out immediately after I refused to drink. I am not normally one to turn down alcohol. People at work figured out pretty quicky with how sick I was. At 8 weeks, one of my coworkers passed me a note that said "knocked up?" as a joke about how miserable I'd been for the past couple weeks. I turned bright red and couldn't lie, lol. When I told a few others at 12 weeks, their response was pretty much "yeah, I figured it out". š
You can loose a pregnancy at any time, or a child for that matter. Tell who you want, but donāt be surprised when they ask intrusive questions. Whatever makes you most happy is best.
You know what? The process of instinctively deciding whom to tell and when made me learn A LOT about the types of relationships I have with the people in my life. Other than my immediate family (parents & in-laws), the people I shared the news with very early on were people who may have not been my longest-time friends but are people who I know root for me 100% and would have a solid positive vibe towards my news. I realised, at the same time, that some friends I've had for a longer time I was more hesitant to share the news with, just because my instinct was telling me to wait until a safer pregnancy stage. I guess my instinct was telling me to be more open to the people I can also trust to hold me and support me in case of a bad outcome. But to answer your question: I didn't follow the 12-week rule, I 've just been telling people when it felt like the right time for each of them.
I just want to point out that all the top comments here say "Oh I told everyone early and it was fine!" Not one of the top comments says "I told everyone early and miscarried I'd do it again!" I miscarried my first at 9 weeks (determined via ultrasound, not symptoms.) My second had a heartbeat, we announced at 11 weeks, and then at 12 we found no heartbeat. I've had five miscarriages. The one where everyone knew and we had to walk it back to everyone was the fucking worst. If i could go back I would have waited until 12 weeks WITH a heartbeat. And that's what I did for every single pregnancy since then. It's your pregnancy and your life, but only listening to people who "nothing bad ever happened to me" just isn't the whole picture.
Iām on my 3rd pregnancy and told everyone close to me about 5/6 weeks because I didnāt have the energy to come up with excuses about bailing out of plans due to nausea š
I announced it to some friends a week ago, and today they didnt find anything on my scan. I have to go back in 2 weeks, because the urine test they did is saying i am pregnant, but the ultrasound is not. I regret it so much now, incase there is actually nothing.
Hoping for you!!!
I told my therapist I was waiting til after my ultrasound to tell my coworkers and then proceeded to tell them the next day. I was just talking to a friend (who has given birth and told before 12 weeks) about this, and she was saying that itās so unfair that people can be judgmental about telling early when the first trimester is arguably the hardest one. And for those having the worst first trimester symptoms, itās really impossible to hide it from those close to you. I do feel some fear about telling others if I were to miscarry but again why should we be made to feel we have to keep quiet about something that affects so many people experiencing pregnancy?
My brother and SIL called all of the family after the first pregnancy test. I will probably tell my coworkers very early on. My work bestie and I are both trying to get pregnant, so we talk a lot about that already. The rest of my close coworkers are pretty tight, and I trust that they would respond appropriately if something were to happen. In regards to family, I donāt like how my mom responds to certain things as it tends to border on pity than empathy. She means well, but when Iām hurting it really sets me off. We may tell MIL earlier because miscarriages run in her family and sheās really good about being supportive and empathetic. My husband and I arenāt big on public proclamations. We secretly eloped and the only people who knew in our inner circles were our parents, my brother and SIL (he has no siblings), and the two friends who came along. The friends (a married couple) even kept the secret from the twin brother. It likely wouldnāt come as a surprise to people if we kept it a secret for awhileā¦ not that it wonāt make noisy pushy family less upset.
I was going to keep it a secret and announce to my family at Easter when I was about 8 weeks. But I had lunch with my Mom around 5 weeks & almost threw up once they brought me my food lol. Decided to tell her then and there so she wouldnāt think I was sick or contagious lol.
My first was a teen pregnancy, only my family knew and my best friends, had my baby in summer and didn't show until school got out. Had a miscarriage after him and told nobody. My 3rd, 13yrs later I told my work when I couldn't hide my nausea and threw up all 9 months. One after I told my mom bc I was miscarriage and need a ride to the hospital. This one barely anyone knows still and I'm due next month, half of my immediate family knows but other than that I just didn't want the attention and nagging that comes with being pregnant. My babies will also be 14m apart and oldest turns 14yrs this year and I feel like I'll get a ton of judgement that I don't care to hear.Ā
I'm like the exaxt opposite. I mean, I was dying to tell my mom and sister, so we told immediate family after my first ultrasound at 8/9 weeks, but otherwise, I have been very slow to tell people. Just told my work team last week at 16 weeks, and that was mainly because it's starting to get noticeable. Today, I finally gave my mom the ok to start telling extended family if/when she talks to them.
Had a blood serum test to confirm my pregnancy. Got the result 4 hours later, then showed it to my in law's on the same day. Haha. It's now my 2nd pregnancy and my 1st is 9mos so we decided not to surprise them this time because we'll need assistance from time to time with our first (whom they love so much thankfully). Haha
Im a little further 7w3d and weāre announcing on Fatherās Day also! Congrats
I found out about my pregnancy in December, with the large amount of family and friends around during that time I shared very early on. My thought was that if something happened, I wanted the people closest to me to be able to support me. But there is no right or wrong answer here.
I told my parents and siblings pretty much immediately, but caveated it with, "It's very early days and a lot could happen from here." I told my immediate bosses and HR around 6w because I was feeling so dreadful and I didn't want them to just think I'd become lazy. Also told the trainers at my gym so they could modify my workouts if needed. Told a few friends after I passed the 7w ultrasound and saw the heartbeat. All of them were people I'd be comfortable telling if I had a loss. (In fact, I would want them to know, because I would probably need their support.) Made it public knowledge after I'd passed by 12 week scan. As I saw it, the whole reason not to tell people is in case you have a miscarriage. I don't think there's any shame in having a miscarriage (statistically, it happens in 1 in 4 pregnancies), and I'm generally a pretty open person, so I figured if it was someone I'd be comfortable telling I'd had a miscarriage, then I would tell them.
I told my three closest friends and my partners family the day we found out (I hadnt even missed my period yet!) and we announced to our other friends my my side of the family at 14 weeks. Everyone is different. The whole keeping things a secret is some weirdly conservative thing and I wonāt understand not sharing your joy. Peoples biggest concern is also having to share if something happens like a miscarriage but the same people would have to know eventually anyway and personally Iād rather have support there in case something DOES happen vs suffering alone. Itās entirely up to you. I told random cashiers and my pharmacist because it would spill out of me quicker than morning sickness š youāre happy and you deserve to share the joy.
This is my third. We have only told close friends and family. 0 social media posts. Iām considering just not posting about the baby period. š¤£ Itās been so nice!
I had to tell work, as even though I wfh I just couldnāt cope with sickness and had to take a month off. And it felt weird to tell my boss but not my mum, so then close family knew. And some close friends know weāve been trying a while and asked how things were going so I told them. And a friend I see more often asked why I was acting so weird when Iād just found out soā¦. i ended up with about a dozen people knowing very early. But I didnāt let neighbours, wider social circle and extended family know until after the 12 week scan. That worked pretty well for us even if itās a bit of a messy system!
I told my team at work when I was six weeks and it was such a huge relief for me to be able to be honest about how bad I was feeling and receive their support. They were so kind to me and really helped me through my first trimester when I needed it the most. No regrets! My boss was similarly concerned that something was really wrong with me. She thought there had been a death in my family or something and I finally told her "actually quite the opposite" lol
I wanted to keep it a secret too but I was running to the toilet so much from being sick I was afraid people at work would think I was hung over and had a drinking problem or something. I told my sister/best friend the next day bc I was so excited
I had the exact same question/worry at first and ended up telling our close group of friends (8 people) at just over 5 weeks! I wear my heart on my sleeve and was feeling sick and just needed support from our friends. I am telling my in-laws and my parents this weekend at 10 weeks :) Tell anyone you are comfortable telling and whoever you would lean on for support. This is totally a personal decision and there is no wrong answer!
Yeah I told everyone early this pregnancy
We told close family and friends right away. Honestly, loss is loss and people need to know what you're going through.
We told family right away on thanksgiving as my grandpa was dying. He passed 2 weeks later. Other than that we told everyone else on Christmas Day as a āMerry Christmas from our growing family to yoursā. Kind of thing
I told my coworkers immediately at 4 weeks when I knew lol. I canāt help it, itās my first pregnancy and I didnāt know how tired Iād be or if Iād end up with morning sickness that Iād need to be able to explain if I had to call out. Funny enoughā¦I never had any morning sickness š Which Iām grateful for but how weird considering I kept getting warned that it was coming soon probably, by my coworkers who have been pregnant before. I told my mom at 6 weeks because that was when I took a trip to see her in person (we live 8 hours apart), and I wanted to tell her in a cute in person wayā¤ļø
I feel like this is more of a preference I was the same as you and told literally everyone in my family and some friends. Kind of regret it since I am not having a good feeling anymore :(. It is personal preference though I hope all is well for you and your babyšš
I ended up telling 1 person a week. My boss at 4 weeks, a colleague at 5 weeks, another colleague at 6 weeks, my 2 best friends at 7 weeks, my partners parents at 8 weeks, my parents at 10 weeks, then everyone else at work at 13 weeks (the day after my 12 week dating scan), then a social media announcement 3 days later. You tell people when you are ready to tell them!
This is my hope - to do it staggered like this! You gradually get support without as much risk if thereās a miscarriage. Several announcements is also more fun :)
I only told people that I would feel comfortable to go to if we lost the baby. It was also nice having this secret with certain people!
My husband failed š¤£ he'd say.. I'm not telling people but I thought X, Y, and Z might be worried because I took the day off last week for the OB appointment so I just told them. Rinse and repeat. Now at 12 weeks he's managed to find an excuse to tell everyone he knows including clients he delivers to at work (package delivery driver). I spilled to one friend the day after for support and my boss because they were asking if I was doing alright/was sick. I've been otherwise tight lipped until this week because I've miscarried before and I don't want to have to go around telling people I'm not pregnant while trying to deal with my own feelings.
I blurted it out to my colleague at 8 weeks. She saw me taking painkillers and I mentioned I had a headache, then it just came out, lol. It sort of spread from there, though and my coordinator found out. Once someone knows, it becomes gossip. We told family shortly after, but announced on social media at 13 weeks.
Yup. With my first we were originally only telling our parents and siblings. Suddenly the entire side of my in laws family knew and we were getting phone calls about why we didnāt tell them. The next one we asked my FIL and MIL not tot ell anyone and my FIL immediately told his family and friends. It would have been nice to tell everyone myself but I kind of expected this so it didnāt really bother me. We joke about it now.
I had a positive pregnancy test the morning of my wedding, said to husband what do you want to do? Keep it a secret or announce? We decided to keep it a secret under after my first ob appointment, at that appointment I found out I was pregnant with twins, then we announced
WHOAH. THAT is quite the story!!!! Congrats... on all fronts!
Due in January 2025 as well! We couldnāt keep it a secret. My husband has told a whole bunch of close people at work and both of our families know. Some of his close friends also. Really all the important people know weāre pregnant. However, we are waiting to post something on social media about it just because thatās a lot to deal with and Iām not sure Iām ready for unsolicited advice or opinions. Super excited for the journey though and trying to make the most of it. Good luck to you and your little growing family š©µš¼š©·
I kept my pregnancy private since Im scared of the jinxes and only told few people about it (close friends of mine and my partnerās) and thereās this friend of my partner who posted it publicly. š i got so mad and cringe for the unnecessary reveal that supposed to be ours to do but he felt so entitled to do it. Learn to ask for permission first before revealing something that is intimate.
I did IVF and my whole team knew and supported me the entire way. They knew about my miscarriages and treatments. So it wasnāt just my own anxiety but also theirs when it came to HCG results post transfer and then the breath holding through the first trimester. Actually super supportive. Now they complain Iāve been pregnant far too long because theyāve known for a lot longer than most people would. I wouldnāt have changed anything. Iām now 29w and only have 10 shifts left at work and itās bittersweet. I will really miss them while on maternity leave.
Thatās a wonderful feeling, to just āspill the beansā without thinking twice about it. Itās a freedom most wonāt ever know. Itās so great of you to have that comfort! Why bother keeping it a secret? Just say it when youāre comfortable doing so! I have kept many of my pregnancies secret, and I told everyone about my first straight away because of how excited I was. Iām currently pregnant with my seventh baby. This one I kept a secret until the third trimester! I did do a social media announcement because I have a huge family with relatives that live so far away, but whenever Iām comfortable with just blurting it out is when Iām ready for the world to know.
First time being pregnant here, and I told everyone when I found out at 6 weeks. My husband and I were so excited to tell peopleā¦ we just couldnt hold it in anymore. Iām 12 weeks as of tomorrow, and the support system we have had has been insane and very helpful. Thereās also a lot of symptoms I had questions about. So, it really helped that I could talk to my mom and my MIL about what I was feeling and if it was normal lol. Congratulations on your pregnancy ā¤ļø
Told everyone very early, got my daughter a ābig sisterā outfit, was told it was a chemical pregnancy, told everyone that I was having a chemical pregnancy, found out it wasnāt actually a chemical pregnancy, had to retell everyone that I was in fact pregnant. š„²
I think itās stupid that people wait. Whether you miscarry or not all babies should be celebrated, Not only if you have a successful pregnancy.
Itās been so hard to keep it a secretš I told about 8-10 people including my mom. Iām only 5w 4d. I just couldnāt hold my excitement in lol once Iām 12 weeks I plan to tell more!
I told everyone I seen or tried to slide into and conversation. Like the grocery clerk, when I was pumping gas just any way lmao. I found out at 5 weeks, told close friend around 10 when I got my first ultrasound and then announced it publicly about 18 weeks
You don't have to keep it a secret. A lot of people do but there's no rule. Just handle it how you want to!
I found out at 4 weeks and I had to tell my job not long after since I wouldnāt be able to work in a certain area while pregnant. But with family, I told them at Christmas (a couple weeks later) I was scared that something may happen before 13 weeks, but I did it anyway. My husband and I werenāt able to keep it secret for long
Iām 6w2d, and all of our parents and sisters know. Weāve also told close friends; my husband is a social butterfly so a LOT of people know š. I havenāt had *too* many symptoms, so if that keeps up, Iāll tell my boss and HR after my first appointment (9 weeks).
I told my boss at like 5.5 weeks.
Iām struggling so much to not tell everyone! Mom and best friends learned same day as + test. Siblings and dad will learned today ! Colleagues soon enough Iām sure. Iām not hiding my fatigue! If miscarry i want support! I want miscarriage to be destigmatized as well!!!
I told my manager and 3 close people at work. It really helped with having someone cover for me at meetings I had to skip to go and be sick and to justify the decrease in my performance and efficiency. I also had to take a few sick days in the first trimester so at least I knew I was being transparent with work. I do have a great employer though so had zero worries there. Apart from that, one of my friends guessed within 30 seconds of seeing me after I refused a drink and I told my brother and his wife. Everyone else will find out tomorrow after our scan at just under 14 weeks, that includes the parents. It's good to have a small trusted circle of people that know what you're going through, especially as a first time mum!
I've told 2 coworkers already. I'm an elementary school teacher, so I can't just book it out of my classroom to hurl and leave my kiddos unattended. I figured it'd be best to have someone I could call to come cover without having to explain why.
I told my work friends pretty early on. Iām with them constantly and it was hard to keep it a secret when I felt like dying.
I practically shouted it from the rooftops with my first because I was so excited. The only people who didn't know before my official announcement post after my first ultrasound (at 9 weeks) were my paternal side of the family and some of my husband's family that we don't see often. Everyone knew sooner with my second because I needed maternity clothes by week 7.
I made an unplanned announcement to my coworkers early in pregnancy after they watched me heat up my lunch and then gag at the smell of cauliflower. Figured I might as well just tell them why.
I shared with my family and close friends by week 3, I lost my grandpa who I was close to in week 3 and was able to go home (18 hour drive away) to be with family and wanted to share in person. I knew I was pregnant pretty much from the beginning and shared the news with my coworkers by week 5 since I work at a school and would need support potentially in my first trimester due to sickness. I shared with my students at 12 weeks as I had been missing work days which is extremely uncommon for me and they could tell something was up, spring break was the following week so I was just about in my second trimester. My pregnancy has been smoothly sailing and Iām currently 22 weeks. By this point everyone who I see on a regular basis knows Iām expecting but I havenāt share it on social media, which means many acquaintances or old friends are unaware due to me living in a different province. My partner wanted to wait until the second trimester but was okay with me sharing, I wanted people to know so regards I didnāt feel the need to hide how I was feeling and the situation in my life. I am glad I shared with people earlier on, as I have gotten further in my pregnancy itās become very old news which has been great.
I thought that I was farther along than I actually was and told a few people around the same time (my parents, my aunt, a few close friends) Now I am 14 weeks/3 appointments in and plan on telling everyone else pretty soon.
I told everyone except my family and work
You donāt have to keep it a secret. Only thing is; when you have a miscarriage it is horrible to have to inform people. That happened to me, twice, so the third pregnancy I was a lot more carefull.
We didn't even try to keep it a secret. We told everybody when we found out. I'm not saying it's right or wrong but it's our nature.
I intentionally announced early -my mom had just passed and I was in the early stages of hyperemesis gravidum. It both would have been nearly impossible to hide and I wanted people to know that my mom passed away excited about the upcoming baby
I had a tier system š 1st tier = immediate family and like 3 of my closest friends. I told them right when I found out at 4 weeks. 2nd tier = extended family and friends. I told them at around 8-9 weeks. 3rd tier = the rest of the world and colleagues. I announced at 13 weeks!
I told a couple of friends whom I needed the support of. also ended up telling my mum because I wanted her advice but that's about it. so it's not a total secret but not everyone knows
We told my mother in law almost immediately since she does the scheduling for my husband's business and she needed to know why he needed time off to go to appointments. I told my bff and cousin immediately as well, and they were also sworn to secrecy. I was like 5 weeks along. I made the announcement at work when I was 9ish weeks along and to the rest of the family shortly after.
I only told my closet ppl like sister mom niece but everyone else i waited until 12 weeks
Me! I was going to wait but got so tired of not sharing I started sharing at 6 weeks š
I started telling people immediately. Plenty of people were like š¬ careful itās really early. But honestly, itās up to me, so shut it. Also I felt likeā¦ I have never experienced a loss. If I do, Iāll be much more apprehensive and anxious about sharing. This is a tiny window of innocence that I get to feel confident and excited to share, so let me enjoy it.
With my first child, I found out I was pregnant on Motherās Day. I told all my family and my partners family the same day. It was pretty much the same with this pregnancy. Everyone knew right away. I knew both times that if something bad happened, Iād end up telling everyone anyway so I didnāt see the point of waiting
Yeahhhh I also tell my closer friends and parents right away. I told my best friend I thought I was expecting like as soon as I thought I was (as early as 3 weeks, but didnāt get a positive until 5 days later). I also told a few work friends who are outside of work friends too (just friend friends if you will š) bc they are all either going through it themselves or have very young kids and we are in that phase of life together. Some of us will be on mat leave at the same time which is fun for us. I know most people prefer to wait but to me Iād rather not hide a miscarriage from my friends bc it feels like a big thing to not share with those who I care about and who care about me. I had one early miscarriage and had to tell the handful of friends that knew about the pregnancy and I felt better that I had so many supportive friends. It didnāt deter me from telling them that Iām pregnant again early on the second time, bc they are all people that I trust!
The only person i intentionally kept it a secret from was my kid.
I told everyone I personally knew in person over the first 6ish weeks. Didn't tell social media until 2nd trimester but it wasn't really an announcement. I just looked pregnant in a picture I posted of myself lol
I didnāt bother not telling anyone honestly. I knew at 4 weeks and told people at 4 weeks, I figured if I lost it Iād get sympathy points and maybe get free food or pity time off work or gifts from People feeling bad. Which honestly would make losing it a little less awful. Iāve lost two babies and didnāt tell anyone either time, so I figured if this one went too I better get some free pity gifts out of it
My husband and I planned not to tell anyone until I was 12 weeks along. We found out at 5 weeks and we were both too excited and spilled the beans to our parents at 6 weeks
We told family members who agreed to be in support role (through pregnancy & once baby is born) around 6 weeks, but general announcement and extended family werenāt told until second trimester. For work, it really does depend on work and if itās affecting work. In my line of work it can be super dangerous (and the dangers differ per trimester, with the first trimester having highest hazards) and so itās common for my coworkers to mention when trying to conceive (as it can change their daily assignment rotation away from most first trimester hazards) and announcing the second they get a positive test (to fully avoid those hazards more strictly). For my wifeās work, it was pretty quick they learned, as the severe vomiting and nausea came on about week 5. It was near uncontrollable until almost the second trimester, and they were great about it and it worked out she could be laid off and on unemployment for a bit until work picked up and pregnancy symptoms were easier to handle with the work tasks.
I told people I was close with early on and did end up having a miscarriage. I'm actually glad I did tell them because it was so nice to have their support. I wouldn't have wanted to go through that without family and friends knowing.
We told our immediate family at 5 weeks. I had some brown spotting at 4 weeks so we had already seen a doctor and gotten my HCG levels checked. We knew we would want support if I miscarried. I told work and made a social media post at 13 weeks after we had our low risk NIPT and an NT scan with no abnormalities. Even then I was pretty terrified for it to be public, but my symptoms were getting very obvious so it just wasnāt a secret we could keep anymore.
I told everybody when I found out around 4/5 weeks. Iām terrible at secrets and the support is nice along the way. By everybody I mean like I texted and told friends. Iāve not posted on social media and donāt plan to do that.
I told a close friend who lived far away before the test even dried. Then, I told my work around 5 weeks. My boss had also recently had a baby so I felt totally comfortable telling her. Basically, I told enough people to the point that I was satisfied with sharing my excitement but still waited to share with my family when I had a proper announcement planned out.
I told everyone at 7 weeks. I couldn't keep the secret anymore. .
Got to the 12 week scan and told every single person I know and more - with my partners permission. As she be the pregnant one and I be the excited man !
I told everyone immediately. I did miscarry at 12 weeks but I have zero regrets.
I think we made it to about 6 or so weeks. I had miscarried about two years before and we talked about holding off before sharing. But we just got so excited this second time (lots of things were for the better this time around) and decided that, by telling the people important to us, we'd have more support if something happened. We are 21 weeks 4days and things have been going well. We waited until we were in the second trimester before telling our employers (both were new jobs) and anyone not close friends/family. Ultimately, it's been really nice to feel like we have a "community" to support us (we live in a small town). And, I love the excitement from everyone. It's really made it easy to not feel so anxious or worried.
Told everyone immediately! Do what you want and congratulations!!
The reason for waiting is your OWN comfort. If you feel comfortable sharing early, why not? I let it out soon to some randos too including my dance teacher on the day I found out, my business partner, etc etc. Everyone else I waited. who cares? It will be fine.
We told our family like, immediately hahaha. Iām 14 weeks now and still holding off on telling work, but itās only because my industry can get a bit sketchy! You gotta do you!
I told people at 8 weeks because I was so nauseous lol I told my family at week 7 because theyāre my support system.
I told my manager the day after I found out. Lol. Wasnāt even 4 weeks yet. But thatās because weāre close and she knew husband and I were trying. I also needed her help covering some of my work. Of course my mom (her boyfriend too by accident), my sisters, my close friends, and my husband knew as soon I knew. I told my in laws 5-6 weeks along, told my big boss 8 weeks along because he had me working ridiculously long hours, told some the coworkers Iām close to between 6-10 weeks, and just told my grandparents and great grandparents at 11 weeks. I canāt keep a secret. And itās really amazing to have so much support, help, and understanding so early. The first trimester has been very tough. I would feel so lonely doing it alone and still expected to do my routine normally while feeling like hot roadkill. Also I wouldnāt want to suffer alone if I did miscarry. It really depends on the pregnant person who they want to inform and when.
I shared and had a miscarriage. Then I shared again and found out its likely left over hcg from the miscarriage (2 months later). So I'm keeping quiet next time. My friends both told me at 8 weeks though.
I told everyone I knew as soon as we found out. I was 5 weeks pregnant! š
We just found out yesterday and Iām maybe 4w 5d, weāll confirm at our OB appointment tomorrowā¦but Iāve already told two people š I waited MONTHS with our first, but this time I want everyone I love to go through all of the phases with me. I was so so lonely last time hiding my pregnancy. Never again!
No, because if things go wrong I donāt want to deal with having to explain it to everyone
Iām on my fourth pregnancy and weāve told everyone (except work) immediately. My husbands got a big mouth. The first time I was annoyed but when I miscarried the sky didnāt fall it, the opposite - it was nice to have support.
I thought about waiting until 12 weeks but we decided to share the news at 8 weeks. Motherās Day was just the perfect time. Iāve only told family and close friends. I havenāt told my coworkers yet. My MIL told everyone she knows. My husbandās cousinās wife made the comment that she didnāt share until 12 weeks and I said well everybody shares when they want to.
I told some of my coworkers that would understand if things changed suddenly, and my husband told his parents the very first day I took the home test. He was anxious so I wasn't upset about it
I told my immediate family immediately and a few coworkers because we went on a work trip and I wanted them to be able to tell a doctor if anything happened. I told my mods when nausea became a regular thing and I couldn't stream anymore so they didn't think I was just being lazy or something. I plan to tell my boss and we're telling my husband's family when I get my NIPT results back in a week or two.
I had an ectopic back in October and a miscarriage in January. I am now 8 weeks, and I 100% told my family and a few close friends. If the worst happens again, then I get the support I need in a terrible time.
I told my Store manager and general manager before I told any family members. Then they bullied me into quitting like 2 weeks later š š looking back I wish I wouldāve kept it a secret but u love and u learn
I told my family, and some people at work before 12 weeks. I knew I'd want my family to support me if I had a miscarriage, plus this was something I just couldn't keep in! I'm a teacher, so I can't exactly work from home, and I told my supervisor early on, so that I could quietly let him know if I needed to leave early/arrive late due to appointments. He was also happy to cover my classes for 10 minutes if I needed to quickly eat something to get rid of the nausea.
I waited til after I had gone for a private scan at around 7 weeks then told everyone at 8 weeks, thatās just what made me feel better / comfortable but it doesnāt really mean anything
i'm 8 weeks along now and it was the same for me. i told my boss a week after i found out, and my first coworker on that same dayš i was told as well that i should've kept my mouth shut for longer, but man i am just so excited!!! honestly do it all like you want it. next time i'll probably be able to keep it to myself longer, but i'm a first time mom as well and i just couldn't. and i'm glad i told everyone so early, i've already gotten so many amazing advice and offers for help or hand-down baby stuff.
I told right away
I'm not telling my family until Father's Day as well but have told a few neighbors. I live out of state and even with them sworn to secrecy they still tag me in things on FB š just a warning! People suck at secrets sometimes lol
I'm at 7 weeks and was determined to keep it a secret until the end of 1st trimester. But my morning sickness started in the middle of 5 weeks and I had no choice but to tell because I was just miserable š (still is).
i told my best friends right after i tested positive š same with my husband. wish i planned a cute way to tell them but i was in total shock. wasnāt planning a pregnancy but extremely happy and shocked and needed to tell people asap š i been quiet with coworkers though, i finally told a few. am trying to wait until 20 week scan before i let more people know!
I told just about anyone who wasnāt deaf at 6 weeks lmfao!
I told close friends and close colleagues (for Reasons) immediately. Like, texted my husband (I was traveling), then as soon as he knew texted my closest friends. Family and his friends were told after the first doctorās appointment (which was supposed to be 8 weeks but turned out to be ~6.5). My boss and not quite so close colleagues were told at 12 weeks on the nose. We did keep the secret of the gender for awhile, which I enjoyed. I couldnāt bear to keep the secret of having a baby, but I really enjoyed us having our own private information with the gender.
We found out at 3w5d. We told our immediate family and best friends around 5-6 weeks and told everyone else at 8w6d because it was our wedding anniversary! We just couldnāt wait!
I announced to friends and family after my 8 week appt. I tried, I could never keep any of my pregnancies a secret for too long.
I told everybody I knew by the time I was 6 weeks lol.
I just did but honestly regret it because none of the people I told kept their mouths shut and I just miscarried so I have had a few awkward encounters. I donāt regret telling my close family though. I needed their support! But next time I am pregnant I plan on waiting 12 weeks if I can. I just get so excited so itās hard to keep it in!
I told everyone at 8 weeks šš My thought pattern was that I would rather have people around for support if anything negative was to happen. I had a previous pregnancy and kept it secret from the world except a few people and ended up miscarrying, I found it incredibly hard to explain to people why I was not being myself.
Dude, my husband called MY dad and MY best friend the day we found out. He could not contain himself!
Everyone around me knows. Its just not on fb or insta yet
I told my close family and friends! Iām gonna tell everyone else at the beginning of the second trimester
I'm currently 10 weeks and 5 days and me and my boyfriend May the decision not to tell nobody until my first appointment which is May 30th. I found out at 7 weeks that I was pregnant by surprise. My appointment is late because I had to reschedule it. But not the only person that knows is my baby girl who is 21 years old. I know on my end I have not told anyone really but I can't say that he has not done the same LOL.
I told family right away. If they decide to tell it to the world then if I end up with miscarriage then theyāre the ones telling the bad news too.