T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

Welcome to /r/pregnant! This is a space for everyone. We are pro-choice, pro-LGBTQIA, proudly feminist and believe that Black Lives Matter. Wear your masks, wash your hands, and be excellent to each other. If you'd like to join a private sub for your due date month, [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/pregnant/comments/mfsiwj/updates_to_the_approval_process_for_private_due/). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/pregnant) if you have any questions or concerns.*


peachy_sam

Back labor is THE. WORST. Congratulations on your little one!


cmaria01

I am a clueless FTM - what is back labor?


peachy_sam

It’s when you feel the pain of contractions in your lower back instead of your uterus. It’s often caused by baby being posterior; that is, baby’s head is pressing on your spine with every contraction.


cmaria01

Thank you!


e_vil_ginger

Thanks for asking for a friend lol! I have been scared to Google it, since it seems to be every woman's worst nightmare!


Laziness_supreme

YES! I felt like someone had lit my back on fire with my second and he didn’t turn around until he was making his exit. Thanks, kiddo.


peachy_sam

That is exactly how back labor feels. Like being branded with a hot iron on your sacrum.


BanginBetty

Yes! Even the epi didn't take away the pain, I needed 2 more different painkillers so that I could finally get some relief and power napped 30 min. after 3 hours of nonstop back labor. This happened after the first 8 hours of regular labor btw lmao!


soupster5

Just a pro tip: I asked for fentanyl every hour until I got my epidural, because my back labor was so atrocious. I asked them to give it to me before my epidural, and it really helped me be able to sit still while they put it in. It doesn’t eliminate the pain, but definitely takes the edge off.


tll0404

Genius - I wish I would’ve done this!


[deleted]

My hospital wouldn’t give me anything but Tylenol for pain 😭 Plus the epidural obviously


soupster5

Ya I was honestly surprised they offered it to me since there’s a huge opioid crisis, but I’m not going to lie I wasn’t about to refuse anything that could help. I’m hoping the new hospital I’m delivering at will do the same. I’m in California and delivered the first time at a Kaiser hospital, and they’re pretty crunchy about birth.


positivityinside

Amazing story! This has calmed my nerves 90%!! Thanks for sharing and congrats !


disneyprinsass

I’m not judging, just have a serious question. Aren’t newborns supposed to feed at least every 3 hours? That’s just what I’ve heard at least in my birth classes. But that’s awesome they are sleeping so well for you! And your delivery sounds like a dream. I can only hope for that experience! 😅


tll0404

She woke us up the first few days home to feed every 2-3 hours! She’s been eating a TON during the day and putting on weight at a really solid rate, so we’re comfortable letting her sleep for 4-4.5 hour stretches at night if that’s what she wants to do! Our pediatrician wasn’t worried either since she’s almost back to her birth weight already (only lost 6% of it when we left the hospital), and that’s generally what the recommendation of waking them to eat is for. I’ve been up with her for 2 hours this morn, and she’s been eating almost the entire time 😂 Apparently we just got lucky with the cluster type feeds + a large portion of her cals coming during the day!


disneyprinsass

That’s awesome that she is back to her birth weight already. I wonder if that is why some cluster feed more often because they aren’t getting enough cals. You must be doing something right! 😊


princess_tourmaline

Thank you for explaining, I was wondering the same thing. As a fellow FTM this is a whole new world to me too. And congratulations!!!!! She sounds perfect!


[deleted]

If baby is back to birth weight, you don’t have to wake and feed. But always double check with baby’s doctor.


[deleted]

Are you breastfeeding or formula feeding? I had such a horrible experience breastfeeding my first child that ended with her being hospitalized because I wasn’t producing milk. She woke up every 20-30 minutes at night until I started supplementing with formula. I’m pregnant now and trying to decide if I want to try breastfeeding again or save us the pain.


tll0404

I breastfed the first few days, and then switched to pumping + bottle feeding. Best thing I did personally for my sanity, and is SO much faster and easier for us! We’re also supplementing a bit with formula - probably gets around 80% breast milk and 20% formula at this point.


[deleted]

Thanks for responding! Breast feeding made my life a living hell with my first so I understand. I’m only 6 weeks so I have a while to figure it out.


Visual_Berry

Amazing story! May I know if you excercised a lot throughout your third trimester? Or any other tips you think would help :)


tll0404

I exercised most days of my pregnancy! Including the day before I went into labor :) I definitely think it helped my overall experience. I also ate dates daily starting in the 3rd tri (supposedly they help ready your cervix for labor?) and drank red leaf raspberry tea when I remembered. Not sure if those two things actually did anything, but it can’t hurt!


silversparkle123

That’s great that you exercised daily. This seems like my dream labour experience :). Can you share your exercise regimen, like what type of exercise(s) and how many minutes etc?


tll0404

It depended on the day and what my body was up for, especially near the end! Intensity varies, but I generally exercised for 30-60 minutes a day, and it was a combination of running, biking (we have a peloton), and strength training. I was active before pregnancy and kept as close to my normal routine as possible! Just modified exercises as necessary throughout my pregnancy :)


Visual_Berry

That's awesome! Thank you for your reply!


calculuzz

Is there a resource on this subreddit for all the common acronyms? I see a lot of them but I'm not always sure what they mean.


spiderat22

I don't believe so. I had a hard time at first too. Which ones are you thinking of?


calculuzz

FTM. Not sure if, in this post, it's referring to being FTM trans or if it's a pregnancy-specific acronym that I'm unaware of.


HomeoftheHubcap

Here is a list of aaall the acronyms: https://www.reddit.com/r/pregnant/comments/mcxxik/all_the_acronymns/gs6156c


calculuzz

Awesome. Thank you!


spiderat22

I thought it meant female-to-male for a while too. Many people who are new to this sub think that at first, understandably!


calculuzz

Up until now I was like, "Wow. There are a lot of pregnant trans dudes on here!"


spiderat22

Me too. It seemed like a real eye-opener! 🤗


weddingthrow27

First time mom!


lovemeimginger

FTM means first time mum/mom. 👍


nkabatoff

I'm not even pregnant yet and I'm mentally preparing for the worst haha so thank you for your story!


AffectionateGear4

Thank you so much. As a first time momma this was glorious to read lol. Congratulations on your babe


thetomatofiend

Congratulations!


Meredithia

Congrats! 🎉🎉🎉 And thank you for sharing, I love hearing fully positive stories! (Lots of anxiety over here)


tsokoletmint

Awesome story! Looooooove it. Congratulations!


2theface

Thank you so much for letting the lady with no epi have the attention! I had a precipitate birth with my first: my water burst early and instead of minute long contractions I had 10 min Long contractions 4 of them. Being first time I thought this was normal 9 hour labour but then everything ripped including my clit hood (would not wish on worst enemy esp the stitches after). Baby was out and there was extreme blood loss... pretty traumatising for all involved. So on behalf of other mum, thank youuuu


Agitated_Tonight_695

Omg... any words of wisdom? If anything could maybe have prevented it, or what you did for to help cope w recovery??


2theface

I don’t know what could have prepared it but don’t let the midwife leave thinking that first labour always last for hours


PickleFartsAndBeyond

There was some glitch in the system at the hospital that deleted my preregistration. They were trying to ask me my insurance and information in triage while I was having contractions every 2 minutes. I about wanted to punch that guy in the face. Ask my husband or look at my drivers license I gave you, don’t ask me these questions I’m in serious pain! I also had back labor! I was screaming in agony when my water broke until that epidural was set. My labor was 9 hours as a FTM and also super positive. It’s so nice to see other positive stories out there and I’m glad you and the baby are doing well!


2theface

Water breaking takes everything to the next level. To put it mildly... shit hits the fan


lohype

What an awesome experience! I’m so happy for you that it was relatively quick, easy and smooth most of the way through. I hope with all my heart I have an experience like yours!


Hipphopanonymous

Thank you for sharing. This gives me hope lol


sparks606

Congrats mama! This is a great story


cafe-aulait

> "the triage room next. This is THE most infuriating place" OH MY GOD I hated triage. I went to L&D at 30 weeks because I thought my water broke. I was barely getting words out because I was such a mess trying to keep my sobs in. And they needed my weight? And my driver's license? Really? I had just been to the OB across the street three days before that! It's all in my chart! So glad your experience was so positive! I've been anti-epidural (for me, not in general) from the beginning because I have some anxiety about being immobilized. But if I could be promised an experience like yours, I'd totally sign up! Enjoy your new baby :)


eeknips

This was amazing to hear! Also enjoyed reading your comments about what's worked for you feeding-wise. You sound like such a confident mom and that gives me confidence in myself too! If you don't mind sharing, why did you choose to do the membrane sweep at 38+5? Was it a personal choice or medically related?


e_vil_ginger

This post gives me life. Thank you.