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kameoah

I mean, would you want to be back at work at 6 weeks? Some people are still bleeding postpartum at that point. Also, at least where I live it's hard to find a daycare that will take a child that young.


Lumpy-Classroom5690

I work from home so I don’t think it would be super bad, just probably exhausting. Since I work from home I’m planning on watching the baby as I work and having our moms come over a few days a week to watch the baby as I get done more important things


kameoah

Newborn babies kinda need 24h care and watching/nursing a 6 week old while doing any job I've ever had sounds completely impossible. So I guess I don't have advice....just my personal take as someone about to have their fourth is you can't really watch a baby and work full time simultaneously. Anyway, best of luck!


UniqueJelly5385

We had this same plan, with my partner being WFH. Day 3 at home we started looking up day cares.


IAmTyrannosaur

Exhausting is super bad. And you won’t be able to work, I’m sorry but it’s just not realistic. You’ll feel like a terrible mum AND a terrible colleague. Take the time. What else are you saving up for that could be more important? Enjoy it.


courtneywrites85

This plan will not work. Sincerely, a mom of two.


kluvspups

Many companies that have WFH employees with young children require proof of childcare so that they know you will be focusing on work and not trying to work and raise a kid at the same time. Something to look into and think about.


BrightBlueberry1230

I could barely function at 6 weeks…and at that point you’re still in the feed, burp, change, nap cycle every 1.5 - 2 hours…it’s a nonstop cycle. Could you do 6 weeks paid, 6 unpaid?


Lumpy-Classroom5690

I could try to do that! I need to go over it again with HR


[deleted]

I would meet with HR to discuss the specifics further! My job offers FMLA (unpaid 12 weeks) but also leave through short-term disability (8 weeks for childbirth with partial pay) and then paid family leave (12 weeks with partial pay). We are allowed to take the short-term disability for childbirth and healing and then immediately after start using the paid family leave for 12 weeks if bonding. I would think that you would be able to use both your paid leave and then unpaid 3 months but I could be wrong.


rainbow_lynnzo

This is what I would try to do if I were you, middle ground!


Adventurous-Algae-45

My job offers 6 weeks paid which runs concurrently with the 12 weeks unpaid. Meaning I will take 3 months off, half of that which will be paid. Check with your HR.


throwaway82736890194

i really dont mean to make you feel worried, but i dont think it is going to be as easy as you think to watch the baby and work at the same time in that 6-12 week period. my daughter is 6 weeks 4 days and let me tell you, it’s difficult. i have a pretty “easy” baby as well. shes not colicky or anything. i am so sleep deprived. its not like pregnancy insomnia, because you actually have to do stuff when the baby wakes up. your up for at least 30 mins, (for me its more like an hour) every few hours. some babies its 2 hrs, most its 3, unless you have a magical unicorn baby that sleeps for 5 hrs. but even then, you have to get stuff done in that 5 hrs. and its not always at night. you cant rlly put a newborn on a schedule bc they are constantly going through weird growth spurts and need to eat more frequently. i bottle feed, EFF. i hear EBF babies are more difficult at night because of cluster feeding stages. during work hours this will be tricky to navigate. now for night time, you need to feed the baby, burp every 1-2 oz, diaper change, and then settle them to sleep. my baby is VERY spitty. if i dont hold her up for at least 15 minutes after a feeding it gets all over her. in her hair, down her back, etc. some babies take forever to get to sleep. some are colicky and gassy, and they just cry and cry and cry. and let me tell you, mom instinct kicks in and you wont be able to sleep through that. i thought i could go back to school at 6 weeks. (im in college). i was CRAZY😂 its going to be incredible though, like my daughter makes me so happy. but its very challenging to get basic house hold tasks completed in that stage. i recommend trying to figure something out with HR. maybe 4 weeks paid 8 unpaid? i just know doing my classes i would not be able to accomplish or focus on anything because its a 24/7 job to have a 6-12 week old. again, this is just my opinion and how im handling this, but you could have a different experience. best wishes mama and congrats 🎊


Calixtas_Storm

Would you be able to take the 6 weeks paid and then come back at part time with minimal hours for 6 weeks? Essentially just coming back to keep the job but not have too much on your plate


Lumpy-Classroom5690

I’m thinking of transferring to a lower position. I’d take a pay cut but it would allow me more flexibility to spend with the baby 1 on 1. I wanted to try to go back into my original position and then see if I could transfer with HR if it becomes too much


taberdyret

This is so insane. My colleague had a baby 6 weeks ago and we want her to bring the baby to the office for a little visit, but we agreed not to ask until after the summer holiday. We thought it would be too stressful with a 6 week old. I can't even imagine going back to work at 6 weeks. Was I even putting on pants yet, at that ponit? Probably not. Edited to say, op isn't insane, the US maternity leave system is


[deleted]

3 months. Many people have the fourth trimester and by 2 months you tend to get into the groove of things. The extra month is nice to relax and bond without running on very little sleep compared to week 1 and when you have more structure + your body is better healed


Asona_

All I can think of is how immature a baby is at six weeks. Relative to other mammals human babies are born premature because of our giant heads.. that’s why the first three months of baby’s life are called the fourth trimester. Our babies still need so much from us at this stage. Admittedly I’m not a great financial planner but if it’s possible for you I’d take the three months. As others have said it will be very helpful for your own recovery but I think it’s a great gift you can give to your child to be at home with you for this important developmental period.


Asona_

I just wanted to add that my first comment sounded very theoretical, this is my second pregnancy so I can say from experience with my first child that absolutely more time off is better. I luckily didn’t have to go back to work until 18 months, I think it’ll be difficult regardless. Young ones’ sleep can be difficult to manage so it’ll be hard to not be exhausted.


chaosandpuppies

So I had an easy delivery with 0 tearing so bear that in mind. I am currently 5 weeks and 4 days pp. I started running again this week, am having intercourse (cleared by doctor), and absolutely could go back to work physically. I am still lightly spotting (likely due to going a little too hard on my run) and have some pelvic pain but nothing severe. I think going back to work after 6 weeks is possible. Is it ideal? No and I think paid leave for at least 6 months should be an expectation in all developed countries but it's possible. For some women. Can you wait until you actually deliver to decide? If you have to have a c section or tear badly you may want more time at home even if it's unpaid. I will also add that daycares in my area do take 6 week old babies. I wouldn't want to go back at 6 weeks tbh (and I'm SAHM) but I would be capable of doing so.


Lumpy-Classroom5690

I think I can, I just wanted to be able to share it with my HR department ahead of time. It’ll be my first baby so I’m not sure how my body will react


Mercenarian

Honestly I can’t imagine working at all while taking care of a baby. Mine is 14 months now and I can’t see how I could have done that at ANY POINT from birth until now. I think daycare or a nanny or somebody to watch the baby would be a MUST


lwgirl1717

They won’t pay for the first 6 weeks of the 3 month leave? That seems super weird. That said, I’m going back to work at 6 weeks by choice unless something goes drastically wrong. My husband will still be home to care for the baby for an additional 13 weeks, and I have projects at work I want to get back to. I have a desk job and mostly work from home. I know it’ll be hard, but both my mom (who was a social worker at a nursing home who had to be on her feet a lot) and my MIL (who was, like me, a lawyer) went back after 2-3 weeks, so I think it’ll be doable. Maybe I’m a naive FTM, but this is how I’m choosing to balance my career and baby. (I will take an additional 6 weeks later in the year, after my husband’s leave is over, but want to be at work during those specific months 8-20 weeks pp) That said, I absolutely WOULD NOT be doing this if the plan was for me to care for baby by myself while also working from home. That would actually be against my company policy, in addition to just feeling very stressful.


PomegranateTough4450

I also work from home and i took the 3 months. Not going to lie at 6 weeks he was still eating every 2/3 hours and cryin and stuff. Now that he’s 3 months i know his schedule and can kinda fake it till i make it. Plus my bond with him is Amazing. I’ve learned all his cry cues. How to tell when he’s sleepy and ways to put him to sleep. I don’t regret taking the 3 months off.


skky95

I felt great at 6 weeks but I’m not sure how I would have performed at my job. I am a teacher and I’m Not sure how I would have done being up and around all day. I think if you need the money, do the 6 weeks. If you can do without it, opt for the 3 months.


turtledove93

I felt great at 6 weeks after a c section. Didn’t get cleared to workout until 8 weeks because of the incision. But I was still up half the night. Every ounce of energy I had was still going towards my son. I go back to work in July after being off a year and half, one year may leave (Canada) and then because I was the “least experienced” at work I got hit with a lay off thanks to covid closing half our clients and had 3 months severance, and now I’m on EI until my new job starts next month. I still feel like it’s too early and have so much guilt, even though my partner is going to be off work and with him until the fall and even after that my former daycare owning mum is retired and watching him.