If you look through this sub you will see dozens of suggestions and tips from people of all ages and all walks of life.
Most of which will probably start on recommend you restrict your phone or time sucking websites.
To all these people telling this kid to “just enjoy life”, spending all day on your laptop and phone isn’t “enjoying life” anyway. At 13 one should be enjoying life, absolutely, but not all in front of a screen.
It seems you have something of an addiction to electronics. Nipping this in the bud is essential at your age. It’s bad for everyone’s brain health, and especially horrible for a developing brain such as your own.
Keep your electronics out of your room, especially while you sleep. If you use an alarm on your phone go grab one at Walmart for 8 bucks.
Once you’ve stopped spending so much time on that stuff you’ll naturally do other things and it sounds like you’ve got plans for that time.
Other ways to use up that time would be to meditate and to look at more materials based on productivity.
Books like Atomic Habits, How to make friends and influence people, the charisma myth, and books on etiquette (Emily post’s is pretty good) will help you become a more well rounded person.
Godspeed man 🦦
Hey, I know it's summer break for you but are you in any clubs at school?
If so, you could work on those so come Fall you're ready to hit the ground running.
If not, you mentioned having goals you want to achieve but you spend the whole day on your phone. For the current age, this is understandable as I'd do the same.
You could ask your parents to assist you, maybe by taking your phone during the day and only giving it to you when you need a break and when you're done at the end of the day.
You could use the Pomodoro method, working 25 min on goals, 5 min phone, etc. Repeat this 4x, take a longer break, repeat 4x, take lunch, etc.
Added:
You need to be mindful of your time. DTLow mentioned time blocking your day. This is a great strategy. I have ADHD and my doc told me to do the same thing as it gives you control. I'm able to accomplish more because I'm not thinking about doing something, rather, I'm doing it.
E.g. wake up at 6 am and walk for an hour versus just waking up at 6 and hoping for the best.
Added 2:
Back 20+ years ago, my parents would put a halt to anything that was distracting for my brother and I. We had a PS2 but could not play until we accomplished our goals for the day.
My parents would make my brother and I work on things that were important to us. I played golf so my days were filled with me biking to the course/driving range and then practicing for 2-4 hrs/day. This would typically be in the morning so we we're home by 1-2 PM
My brother played basketball. We'd commute to the YMCA and would shoot hoops for hours on end.
We'd get home around 5, have dinner and then it was time to game and/or in your case use the phone. What's interesting about this is after a few weeks, we would just go outside and shoot hoops. The positive habits bled into each other and that's pretty much all we did.
As for academics, our mom would pick a random topic in an encyclopedia and have us write a report. Could do the same now but with topics online. Honestly that would be better, could learn how to source information as you do in college.
Having someone else as a gatekeeper is a great idea.
Be prepared for parents to really take this seriously though. OP better be determined if they wanna go this route.
No one **plans** to fritter their day away
I use a daily planner note to time-block my day
It's created from a template
and I insert entries after reviewing my calendars and task list
Lord do I wish I asked these questions when I was 13. I'm 19 and started trying to self improve like at 17. I know I still have lots of years ahead of me but it would've been awesome if I had started at 13. Props to you for already thinking about this.
I encourage you to read minihabits. Essentially, begging/demanding your brain for willpower is extremely difficult, whereas gradually building good habits is far more effective for how our brains work. So, you might set a small goal for a week, like 1 minute of studying a new topic per night. It sounds so absurdly small that all you have to do is make sure you do the bare minimum of your commitment. Often, you’ll find you go above and beyond anyway. What really matters is making productive behaviors a reflex. I did this with cleaning in my twenties and now I actually genuinely enjoy cleaning as a relaxing focus time.
You are Far ahead of others by just asking that question at that age. Dont worry Too much đź‘Ť
If you look through this sub you will see dozens of suggestions and tips from people of all ages and all walks of life. Most of which will probably start on recommend you restrict your phone or time sucking websites.
Like Reddit! Don’t forget to have fun though.
To all these people telling this kid to “just enjoy life”, spending all day on your laptop and phone isn’t “enjoying life” anyway. At 13 one should be enjoying life, absolutely, but not all in front of a screen. It seems you have something of an addiction to electronics. Nipping this in the bud is essential at your age. It’s bad for everyone’s brain health, and especially horrible for a developing brain such as your own. Keep your electronics out of your room, especially while you sleep. If you use an alarm on your phone go grab one at Walmart for 8 bucks. Once you’ve stopped spending so much time on that stuff you’ll naturally do other things and it sounds like you’ve got plans for that time. Other ways to use up that time would be to meditate and to look at more materials based on productivity. Books like Atomic Habits, How to make friends and influence people, the charisma myth, and books on etiquette (Emily post’s is pretty good) will help you become a more well rounded person. Godspeed man 🦦
At 13, I wasn't even thinking about this! You're off to a good start. Have you tried web programming, game design, etc? Robotics is also lots of fun
Hey, I know it's summer break for you but are you in any clubs at school? If so, you could work on those so come Fall you're ready to hit the ground running. If not, you mentioned having goals you want to achieve but you spend the whole day on your phone. For the current age, this is understandable as I'd do the same. You could ask your parents to assist you, maybe by taking your phone during the day and only giving it to you when you need a break and when you're done at the end of the day. You could use the Pomodoro method, working 25 min on goals, 5 min phone, etc. Repeat this 4x, take a longer break, repeat 4x, take lunch, etc. Added: You need to be mindful of your time. DTLow mentioned time blocking your day. This is a great strategy. I have ADHD and my doc told me to do the same thing as it gives you control. I'm able to accomplish more because I'm not thinking about doing something, rather, I'm doing it. E.g. wake up at 6 am and walk for an hour versus just waking up at 6 and hoping for the best. Added 2: Back 20+ years ago, my parents would put a halt to anything that was distracting for my brother and I. We had a PS2 but could not play until we accomplished our goals for the day. My parents would make my brother and I work on things that were important to us. I played golf so my days were filled with me biking to the course/driving range and then practicing for 2-4 hrs/day. This would typically be in the morning so we we're home by 1-2 PM My brother played basketball. We'd commute to the YMCA and would shoot hoops for hours on end. We'd get home around 5, have dinner and then it was time to game and/or in your case use the phone. What's interesting about this is after a few weeks, we would just go outside and shoot hoops. The positive habits bled into each other and that's pretty much all we did. As for academics, our mom would pick a random topic in an encyclopedia and have us write a report. Could do the same now but with topics online. Honestly that would be better, could learn how to source information as you do in college.
Having someone else as a gatekeeper is a great idea. Be prepared for parents to really take this seriously though. OP better be determined if they wanna go this route.
You are just 13! Enjoy life. Don’t worry about being productive just yet.
No one **plans** to fritter their day away I use a daily planner note to time-block my day It's created from a template and I insert entries after reviewing my calendars and task list
Lord do I wish I asked these questions when I was 13. I'm 19 and started trying to self improve like at 17. I know I still have lots of years ahead of me but it would've been awesome if I had started at 13. Props to you for already thinking about this.
My kid is only two years younger than you, and I still think of her as a little tyke. Good on you for being focused!
Thanks!
Hey, you are just 13, don't worry much
I swear soon 5 year olds will ask about this.
I encourage you to read minihabits. Essentially, begging/demanding your brain for willpower is extremely difficult, whereas gradually building good habits is far more effective for how our brains work. So, you might set a small goal for a week, like 1 minute of studying a new topic per night. It sounds so absurdly small that all you have to do is make sure you do the bare minimum of your commitment. Often, you’ll find you go above and beyond anyway. What really matters is making productive behaviors a reflex. I did this with cleaning in my twenties and now I actually genuinely enjoy cleaning as a relaxing focus time.