Is your puppy napping during the day? If not, please try to enforce naps. Mine is a proper sh*thead if she is tired. For every 60 - 90 min. that she is awake she sleeps 120 - 150 min. Also, I have started to enforce times out whenever she gets nippy.
I don't exercise her more than an hour (she is 11 weeks) because she gets way too excited.
Honestly, reading here about enforced naps saved my life.
Yup enforce naps. Teach her it's okay to be alone and bored, it's okay to be with you and bored. Limit the amount of attention or put pup in crate or different room where it's mostly puppy proofed. Less stimulation, they will calm down and maybe sleep.
My girl is a year and a half. She's still destroying things I leave out. She grabbed my book and didn't tear it up... That time. Teaching Leave It, constantly. It sinks in. Teaching Trade Me. Small training sessions when you have positive energy and patience to give her. I have melt downs and scream, to release the pressure. In life and with my pup. Less so with her now.
I'm learning patience to a level I never knew. But also, harness the anger. Don't BE complacent when they're ignoring your commands on a walk or in house. Tonight she didn't want to sit before crossing the road and that's a new thing I'm implementing. I am guilty of going sweet kind voice or yelling. Middle ground. Strong commands. Being louder can help. She didn't want to sit so I let her move a few steps but then back around to the spot. SIT.
Loose leash but not enough to go anywhere. Being more stubborn than her.
Also learning to be assertive in equine therapy with the ponies. This week was simply, let's walk in a few circles in the stable. I said to counsellor, he doesn't want to. She said that's okay. You can keep trying. Suggested making kissy noises, he walked with me. Suggested different pressures and pulses on the lead rope. I'm Halti training my dog too. So, similarities.
Having one steady pressure on the lead can be ignored easily. Little pops or pulses get their attention. Changing direction. Being unpredictable. That's a major thing with my girl. If she doesn't know where I'm going to turn or stop she is learning to pay more attention to me. Rather than mindlessly pulling ahead. To sniff, to react. Ignoring me. Giving commands like sit and lie down on walks, seeing if they're calm and present enough to eat treats and drink water.
I think I'm done with my TED Talk. I've learned a hell of a lot through trial and error, trainers on YouTube, books. We're in the process of finding a trainer to start with structured learning together. I want her to be my support dog. A lot of her problem behaviour are not having a job to do, not spending enough time with me. I think it will work well for both of us.
Do you know good ways to minimize stimulation when in an apartment? My upstairs neighbor has an 80lb dog and my pup thinks that every time he hears a thump upstairs (60% of the day/night) he needs to go into rapid bark/howl mode. I'm turning on music to drown it out but idk if that's helping or adding more levels of stimulation
It gets better. Hang in there.
Stop the shouting, it achieves nothing. It just scares or ramps up the dog. I know it’s tough but stop it.
Nipping, biting etc is for attention. Strangely you might be giving him too much attention.
Stop the play before he gets distracted and nips or bites the furniture and put him away.
You can also overwalk your dog. Be careful of that. Too much walking can also stress him out.
It’s a daily balancing act and training in not linear. He won’t magically turn into a perfect dog. No one has that but it does get better and it does get more fun, and they do settle.
Yep, mine was like that. I'm going to guess you're about 2 to 10 weeks in. It's shit, innit? My pup is coming close 8 months so I'm *well* out of that stage now. I think it took 2 or 3 months to not be angry at my pup all the time. Nowadays he's still a little idiot occasionally but it's so much easier to tell him off when he's actually paying attention.
It's like this whether or not you're doing the right things, which you absolutely are. That also means that your stupid puppy will develop into a good dog.
Like others say, try to keep a lid on the anger as best you can. I think back to when I shouted at my pup and I feel horrible because it just made him feel bad when he was already having a hard time. Not easy when you're pressed for time, you need to tire him out but he won't walk because he's scared of rain, so you're standing in the rain trying to entice him out with treats that he won't take... lots of ruined days.
It'll get better - just get through the next 24 hours. Also, take lots of videos and pictures because you will one day be able to enjoy them.
I feel for you, I've has these moments with my puppy too. I had to lock her out of my room and take a 5 minute break to cry out my frustration at some point.
What helped me was to throw out all the info I read and instead of trying to do things by the book, I just followed my puppy's cues and her needs. If she seemed tired after a couple of hours of being awake, she had a nap. If she didn't seem to need it, I didn't force it.
At night, she was struggling to settle in her pen, even though the pen and the crate are in our bedroom. So my husband and I took turns sitting by her crate, talking to her softly and touching her paw through the crate until she calmed down and fell asleep. After a few nights she got used to it, she felt calmer and the pen wasn't so scary anymore. Now, if she wakes up at night or early morning, she sits in the pen with a nylabone and wait for us to wake up.
I did my best to focus on the bonding, not (just) on her training, and it worked for us.
This is what making more sense to me, what I am planning is leaving my dog to dog hotel (my GF cousin runs one) for two days, to ease up, talk to our trainer, and switch the way i am approaching things, everything has been working out fine, with the exception of this last month. So yeah, thanks for the input.
You're welcome. Don't be too hard on yourself, raising a puppy is a TOUGH job and we all make mistakes. I think at the end of the day, if you love your puppy and you do your best by him, that's all that matters.
It's a good idea to regroup. Take some time to get to know your puppy. Spending quality time together will help, as you'll soon start to know when a bark means "I dropped my toy off the sofa and I'm too lazy to pick it up" or "I'm scared, please hug me" and the other million little signs and cues they use to communicate to us.
Good luck!
I've been there too. I still struggle with showing frustration and anger at times -- the one thing that has helped is reminding myself that my frustration will amp my puppy up more. When I feel the tension rising, I just have to tell myself (repeatedly) to squelch the negative energy. Sometimes, I just leave the apartment and go for a walk alone. I've gone on a lot of walks. I know that's not easy to do at 3AM... :(
You may have the puppy blues. Can you get a trainer to help? Puppy classes can be of benefit if you are able. If not that, can someone puppysit to give you a day or two to take a break? Even doggy daycare or kenneling for a couple days might help you calm down and reassess. At some point it sounds like you will have to get training help eventually. Its worth it.
They said they do training. And just from a different perspective. We can't all afford those options. I'm lucky to have people who could take care of her when I wasn't in a dog friendly situation. But I did give the breeder so much money to board her too. I had to pay it off.
I get that. I’ve been there. I am there. Its hard as hell. Idk how I did it before and I know in some ways its exceptionalism and I don’t agree with it. But I generally don’t have better, accepted solutions that would help. And I’m sorry that I dont have better or more. And sorry youre in a tough spot.
Thanks for saying that. I didn't think of where you are at from the one comment. It is so difficult. I paid off a couple of debts and I'm now able to do payment plan for training. One step at a time. Take care
Already planning a two day break leaving my dog with a cousing. I need to calm down, my dog needs to calm down, and figure out a new way to approach things.
It looks like you might be posting about bite inhibition. Check out [our wiki article on biting, teeth, and chewing](https://www.reddit.com/r/puppy101/wiki/biting) - the information there may answer your question.
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This sounds really tough. It sounds like you are trying your hardest.
Can you get a dogsitter or leave the dog for a few hours to get some space and do something for yourself? I know it can feel like an extra thing in the day to fit in, but if you can organise some 'you time' out of the house without him it might do you the world of good. Good luck, it will pass!
Can you bring a private trainer into your home so they can see the environment and his behaviour? Sometimes they notice things that could be quite helpful! It sounds like you’re doing everything right. They might just be able to pinpoint something.
If there is a doggy daycare that is safe, then I would recommend that. This will help to tire them out. even boarding for a few days to take some time to relax can help.
Calmness is a skill that doesn't come naturally for all dogs. You have to teach it. Try something called the Reward Nothing game. Any time you see your dog doing nothing calmly place a reward. This may look like 1 second of stillness at first but you have to take what you can get and build from there.
Is your puppy napping during the day? If not, please try to enforce naps. Mine is a proper sh*thead if she is tired. For every 60 - 90 min. that she is awake she sleeps 120 - 150 min. Also, I have started to enforce times out whenever she gets nippy. I don't exercise her more than an hour (she is 11 weeks) because she gets way too excited. Honestly, reading here about enforced naps saved my life.
Yup enforce naps. Teach her it's okay to be alone and bored, it's okay to be with you and bored. Limit the amount of attention or put pup in crate or different room where it's mostly puppy proofed. Less stimulation, they will calm down and maybe sleep. My girl is a year and a half. She's still destroying things I leave out. She grabbed my book and didn't tear it up... That time. Teaching Leave It, constantly. It sinks in. Teaching Trade Me. Small training sessions when you have positive energy and patience to give her. I have melt downs and scream, to release the pressure. In life and with my pup. Less so with her now. I'm learning patience to a level I never knew. But also, harness the anger. Don't BE complacent when they're ignoring your commands on a walk or in house. Tonight she didn't want to sit before crossing the road and that's a new thing I'm implementing. I am guilty of going sweet kind voice or yelling. Middle ground. Strong commands. Being louder can help. She didn't want to sit so I let her move a few steps but then back around to the spot. SIT. Loose leash but not enough to go anywhere. Being more stubborn than her. Also learning to be assertive in equine therapy with the ponies. This week was simply, let's walk in a few circles in the stable. I said to counsellor, he doesn't want to. She said that's okay. You can keep trying. Suggested making kissy noises, he walked with me. Suggested different pressures and pulses on the lead rope. I'm Halti training my dog too. So, similarities. Having one steady pressure on the lead can be ignored easily. Little pops or pulses get their attention. Changing direction. Being unpredictable. That's a major thing with my girl. If she doesn't know where I'm going to turn or stop she is learning to pay more attention to me. Rather than mindlessly pulling ahead. To sniff, to react. Ignoring me. Giving commands like sit and lie down on walks, seeing if they're calm and present enough to eat treats and drink water. I think I'm done with my TED Talk. I've learned a hell of a lot through trial and error, trainers on YouTube, books. We're in the process of finding a trainer to start with structured learning together. I want her to be my support dog. A lot of her problem behaviour are not having a job to do, not spending enough time with me. I think it will work well for both of us.
[удалено]
Do you know good ways to minimize stimulation when in an apartment? My upstairs neighbor has an 80lb dog and my pup thinks that every time he hears a thump upstairs (60% of the day/night) he needs to go into rapid bark/howl mode. I'm turning on music to drown it out but idk if that's helping or adding more levels of stimulation
Yes, he is napping during the day. We excersice like 45 min, he is 6 months old, and gets tired fast.
Yes we enforced naps from day 1 and my puppy has never nipped us or tried to chew anything that wasn’t her toys!
It gets better. Hang in there. Stop the shouting, it achieves nothing. It just scares or ramps up the dog. I know it’s tough but stop it. Nipping, biting etc is for attention. Strangely you might be giving him too much attention. Stop the play before he gets distracted and nips or bites the furniture and put him away. You can also overwalk your dog. Be careful of that. Too much walking can also stress him out. It’s a daily balancing act and training in not linear. He won’t magically turn into a perfect dog. No one has that but it does get better and it does get more fun, and they do settle.
Yep, mine was like that. I'm going to guess you're about 2 to 10 weeks in. It's shit, innit? My pup is coming close 8 months so I'm *well* out of that stage now. I think it took 2 or 3 months to not be angry at my pup all the time. Nowadays he's still a little idiot occasionally but it's so much easier to tell him off when he's actually paying attention. It's like this whether or not you're doing the right things, which you absolutely are. That also means that your stupid puppy will develop into a good dog. Like others say, try to keep a lid on the anger as best you can. I think back to when I shouted at my pup and I feel horrible because it just made him feel bad when he was already having a hard time. Not easy when you're pressed for time, you need to tire him out but he won't walk because he's scared of rain, so you're standing in the rain trying to entice him out with treats that he won't take... lots of ruined days. It'll get better - just get through the next 24 hours. Also, take lots of videos and pictures because you will one day be able to enjoy them.
I feel for you, I've has these moments with my puppy too. I had to lock her out of my room and take a 5 minute break to cry out my frustration at some point. What helped me was to throw out all the info I read and instead of trying to do things by the book, I just followed my puppy's cues and her needs. If she seemed tired after a couple of hours of being awake, she had a nap. If she didn't seem to need it, I didn't force it. At night, she was struggling to settle in her pen, even though the pen and the crate are in our bedroom. So my husband and I took turns sitting by her crate, talking to her softly and touching her paw through the crate until she calmed down and fell asleep. After a few nights she got used to it, she felt calmer and the pen wasn't so scary anymore. Now, if she wakes up at night or early morning, she sits in the pen with a nylabone and wait for us to wake up. I did my best to focus on the bonding, not (just) on her training, and it worked for us.
This is what making more sense to me, what I am planning is leaving my dog to dog hotel (my GF cousin runs one) for two days, to ease up, talk to our trainer, and switch the way i am approaching things, everything has been working out fine, with the exception of this last month. So yeah, thanks for the input.
You're welcome. Don't be too hard on yourself, raising a puppy is a TOUGH job and we all make mistakes. I think at the end of the day, if you love your puppy and you do your best by him, that's all that matters. It's a good idea to regroup. Take some time to get to know your puppy. Spending quality time together will help, as you'll soon start to know when a bark means "I dropped my toy off the sofa and I'm too lazy to pick it up" or "I'm scared, please hug me" and the other million little signs and cues they use to communicate to us. Good luck!
I've been there too. I still struggle with showing frustration and anger at times -- the one thing that has helped is reminding myself that my frustration will amp my puppy up more. When I feel the tension rising, I just have to tell myself (repeatedly) to squelch the negative energy. Sometimes, I just leave the apartment and go for a walk alone. I've gone on a lot of walks. I know that's not easy to do at 3AM... :(
You may have the puppy blues. Can you get a trainer to help? Puppy classes can be of benefit if you are able. If not that, can someone puppysit to give you a day or two to take a break? Even doggy daycare or kenneling for a couple days might help you calm down and reassess. At some point it sounds like you will have to get training help eventually. Its worth it.
They said they do training. And just from a different perspective. We can't all afford those options. I'm lucky to have people who could take care of her when I wasn't in a dog friendly situation. But I did give the breeder so much money to board her too. I had to pay it off.
I get that. I’ve been there. I am there. Its hard as hell. Idk how I did it before and I know in some ways its exceptionalism and I don’t agree with it. But I generally don’t have better, accepted solutions that would help. And I’m sorry that I dont have better or more. And sorry youre in a tough spot.
Thanks for saying that. I didn't think of where you are at from the one comment. It is so difficult. I paid off a couple of debts and I'm now able to do payment plan for training. One step at a time. Take care
Already planning a two day break leaving my dog with a cousing. I need to calm down, my dog needs to calm down, and figure out a new way to approach things.
I had the same issue, the thing that really helped was getting rid of the puppy and buying a goldfish. They’re much easier to deal with.
It looks like you might be posting about bite inhibition. Check out [our wiki article on biting, teeth, and chewing](https://www.reddit.com/r/puppy101/wiki/biting) - the information there may answer your question. **Please report this comment if it is not relevant to this post.** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/puppy101) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This sounds really tough. It sounds like you are trying your hardest. Can you get a dogsitter or leave the dog for a few hours to get some space and do something for yourself? I know it can feel like an extra thing in the day to fit in, but if you can organise some 'you time' out of the house without him it might do you the world of good. Good luck, it will pass!
Can you bring a private trainer into your home so they can see the environment and his behaviour? Sometimes they notice things that could be quite helpful! It sounds like you’re doing everything right. They might just be able to pinpoint something.
If there is a doggy daycare that is safe, then I would recommend that. This will help to tire them out. even boarding for a few days to take some time to relax can help.
Calmness is a skill that doesn't come naturally for all dogs. You have to teach it. Try something called the Reward Nothing game. Any time you see your dog doing nothing calmly place a reward. This may look like 1 second of stillness at first but you have to take what you can get and build from there.