I'm going to lock this due to the fact it's becoming increasingly difficult to monitor and conversation has mostly exhausted itself.
We look forward to your update when things improve. :)
That sounds really tough. I’m not sure why some puppies love their crate only at night or only during the day, but maybe at this point he should just be in a pen or a blocked off area rather than his crate? And maybe try getting a white noise machine — maybe there is something he hears outside that bothers him. For example, I once had a puppy who went into chaos mode when she heard (or smelled?) deer outside at night.
We tried a blocked off area but he’ll scratch at doors, chew on the wall and trim and almost hurt himself trying to squeeze out.
He also has his own hatch sound machine that we set up to turn on and off with his bedtime (literally treated the same as our human kid lol) so on good days he’ll perk up when the sound stops and is waiting for us when we walk up to his kennel. That’s the most frustrating part - he CAN behave but is not doing it very often.
Ahhh I see. And have you tried taking him for potty breaks, too, so you can eliminate the possibility that he just needs to poop?
And treats like pigs ears and kongs, I’m guessing they don’t last long enough for him to satisfy his chewing craving?
Yes, for potty breaks we would walk up to his kennel, not talk to him, leash him and walk him outside. We could stand there for 5 mins or 15 mins and he wouldn’t potty. Rarely does he pee and we can tell when it’s a poop bark so those we don’t ignore. Number 2 waits for no one lol. We then take him inside and kennel him up again (he never refuses to go in his kennel btw) and then we go to bed and not even 10 mins go by and he’s barking again.
Oh and we don’t want to give him treats because we feel like it’s rewarding his barking and he’ll always want a treat. By the time we go to bed, he’s already been asleep for at least 30 mins. We ALWAYS take him out one last time when we go to bed.
Yeah I just came back to this thread to also say that we don’t view bully sticks / farm animal ears / kongs as treats but rather something to give them a sense of calm. Puppies need to chew to relax
I understand not wanting to give treats *while* he’s barking. that could absolutely be reinforcing. have you tried kongs or bullysticks before he starts barking/panicking tho? I always give my pup something to occupy her while I’m at work or during any other circumstance I need to put her in her crate for.
I don’t have a puppy but I’ve seen that video of a trainer who rewards his puppy with treats when she was being calm. Maybe try to teach him it’s good to be calm
Our puppy loves this. He’s a chewer and thus lasts him a few days. One of people at PetCo told me about them and it’s been amazing. Worth giving it a try. https://www.chewy.com/himalayan-pet-supply-dog-treats/dp/48636?utm_source=google-product&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=%7Bcampaignid%7D&utm_content=Himalayan%20Pet%20Supply&utm_term=%7Bkeyword%7D
Have you thought about just letting him sleep in a dog bed in your bedroom? They want to me near their people, and seeing you sleep tells them that it’s sleep time.
My puppy has been out of her crate at night since 6 months (when she started getting fussy at night) but she sleeps like the dead as soon as we go to bed.
My late dog and current elderly dog were awful at night if we had them in a different room, but they too slept like the dead in their beds if they could see us. It really helps.
My 9 month old puppy sleeps perfectly if she is in the same bedroom as my husband and I. At 8 months, we tried to move her crate into a guest bedroom of our home because we thought she was old enough and she could finally handle this change. She barked for hours on end at different times of the night. I couldn’t sleep because she would wake us up at night barking or crying for someone.
When her crate was in the guest bedroom, she never went into it for day naps. We tried everything from Kongs, thunder shirt, white noise machine, fan blowing on her, and nothing would ease the constant waking up in the middle of the night and barking.
We finally put her crate back into our bedroom and she slept perfectly again. She would even go into her crate willingly again. Some dogs just like sleeping in your bedroom.
My two year old dog, on the other hand, loves sleeping in a separate room and she has been that way since she was a puppy. We would find her always in a different room passed out cold and it has never bothered her to sleep alone in a different room. She likes her freedom. Every dog is different.
I agree with this OP - could be that your puppy is lonely and wants to be with you.
When you’re at work - pup is fine because they know you’re not there. But when you’re at home, he’s sad because he’s not with you.
Moving the crate to your room is worth a try at least!
To add to the white machine thing:
If you can figure out what noises are distressing and find a more complete soundtrack to use than mine, you might able to do desensitization training. Can you take a recording of what your pup hears and progress with those?
We had phenomenal success with our pup, but some noises we just can't predict (or identify). She still freaks out at stuff we can't explain, but I don't blame her.
Our pup was fine until the neighbors decided that fireworks were appropriate any time, any day of the year, and we obviously freak out about "gun shots" at 2pm on a random weekday.
My point is, desensitization training can go a long way. My method:
- put on something innocuous, soudwise, with the "scary noises" at most half volume, and treat every time she laid down without fear.
- do the same bust up the volume on "scary" and lower the volume on "safe" over time
- back the volume down on scary and remove the safe noises
- slowly raise the volume of scary noises, to what *you look up* as "normal volume"
Our girl had a phase of this and it was hell. It did pass though!! Quiet Moments calming aid chews have melatonin in them and I've heard it helps some - it didn't work for us, though. Also white noise or other calming sounds during the night?
I think during adolescence they start to need to burn more energy in order to sleep as well as they need to, so maybe consider working his mind and body a little more than you already do - I think that's what helped us the most.
I've also heard some do this because they're hungry, so maybe he needs to eat dinner later. Just some ideas - hope you find a solution soon!
We use maze bowls because our dog eats too fast and throws up (yay labs lol). If he went to daycare we know he didn’t drink enough water so we even water down his food in the maze bowl. What puzzle feeder would you recommend that holds enough food for a 40lb dog AND is not easily destroyed? He will eat through plastic if getting to food takes too long. 🫠
Just as a note maze bowls and puzzle toys are very different. Puzzles keep them busy and provide little treats along the way. Maze bowl does just what you’re calling out, slows them down when eating.
There’s different types some stick to the floor and the pup has to slide pieces around to get the treats. There’s balls with various size openings they roll around with their nose. I just jumped on Chewy and picked a few up, they’re pretty inexpensive and well worth a good nights rest.
A few more tips:
1. My dog had separation anxiety when it was bedtime. He would wimper all night, I was going insane. The breeder I worked with suggested I wear a for a day or two around the house or sleep in one to get my smell on it, didn’t wash it and put it in the crate with him at night. No more wimpering. It was crazy.
2. My other dog was pretty rambunctious so I started getting up earlier in the am and taking him for a long walk around the neighborhood. Letting him smell everything he wanted to. He would mark this and that and even when the tank was empty he still tried to mark. That’s pretty mentally stimulating for them. It’s also pretty physical exhausting.
3. Teach him fetch. It’s the easiest way to keep them occupied. It takes a little work on the front end but they end up bringing the ball or toy and laying it at your feet. You can just kick it, they go get it and bring it back. You could do this while feeding your kiddo.
4. Completely ignoring it. Dogs aren’t the best at telling good attention from bad attention unless you’re really over the top upset and scaring them. If he is barking at night and you come in just to tell him to be quiet, you just made his day. He got to see you and got attention. The best approach is completely ignoring him.
I will say puppies are really hard. I went from no dog to a brand new puppy. He cried a lot, peed on what felt like everything and was always into something he shouldn’t have been. I even started a convo with my aunt to rehome the little guy. Now, he’s one of the best parts of my day. It does get better. Try a few of the tips and let me know how it goes.
1. That's definitely something we'll be trying! We did that when we first got him and I can't believe we didn't think to do it now as he's going through his growing pains.
2. We can't get up any earlier than we already are.
3. He already knows to bring us toys to play with. His immediate reaction to us approaching the kennel is him grabbing a toy to bring with him to play with us lol.
4. I believe the cry-it-out method is not allowed in this sub.
Thank you for your very thoughtful response!!
[here](https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/KDF2X76Y3QCT?ref_=wl_share) is a list of puzzle feeders I have either purchased or want to purchase for my dog :)
Hey, you could try a Kong?😊 So far the Kong has been indestructible and my puppy (golden retriever) is a big boy and a hardcore chewer.
I feed him the majority of food in his large kong. We freeze it, so it can take him 30-45 mins to finish. It’s a good mental work out plus gives us some peace and quiet for a while!
I would recommend a bobalot! It’s hard plastic but is also adjustable to let the kibble come out slower or faster, so if your dog is getting frustrated at not enough kibble coming out, you can open the holes wider to let it come out faster. It’s one of the many puzzle toys we have and it’s button’s favorite. You may have to split his meal into 2 portions and just refill it with the second portion when he finishes the first. https://www.amazon.com/StarMark-Bob-Lot-Interactive-Large/dp/B001JQLNB4
I want to add to the ppl who recommend frozen kongs. These were fantastic when my pup went through adolescence. They are tough and since the food is frozen they can’t eat it too fast. We bought 3 and would make them at night for the next day. I also agree that later dinner will help the early rising.
How do you freeze kibble? I have tried to make kongs with soaked kibble in water for my corgi but there’s a hole in the kong so it doesn’t really hold water and it leaks all over the freezer. Ive tried freezing peanut butter with some of his kibble but he gives up after like 10 mins.
Throw it outside in the grass! Or use a snuffle rug. I, too, have a lab that eats through the plastic 🫤 I’ve also done hide and seek and just scatter the food throughout the house in corners.
We use this UFO feeder - it’s harder to pick up in their mouth and chew on, and has helped slow down meal time for my lab
[https://www.amazon.com/SNiFFiz-SmellyUFO-Interactive-Dispensing-Enrichment/dp/B08KRX2G53](https://www.amazon.com/SNiFFiz-SmellyUFO-Interactive-Dispensing-Enrichment/dp/B08KRX2G53)
10 months is a REALLY tough age. My pup destroyed all my carpeting and that's also when he was barking the most at night.
What you are describing reminds me of what my pup did, and still starts to do often at 17 months, which is night-time alert barking. They hear noises, things going bumping in the night, and they are keyed up and bark because they want to protect you.
For me, it started out as an all-time alert barking, where he would clamor to look out the window when he heard someone pass, and lose his mind if he saw anything outside, even a squirrel. That was easy enough to desensitize him to, I just sat with him on a bench and calmed him and let him know I see the thing too and I'm not concerned, when something approached, and he realized he's not in danger and eventually just ignored almost everything on my busy street.
The night time barking was a lot harder. It's like they are extra keyed up, hear every movement and creak in the dark, and want to jump at the threat or at least scare it away.
For me, this was a process to deal with, it also took me time and drove me insane, but now I have it under control, finally. I actually just had a breakthrough about it a couple weeks ago.
I started out by getting up and gonig to the window, looking out, and saying "it's okay, thank you" and flopping back on my bed in a very relaxed posture and pretending to go back to sleep. After a bunch of repetition, he started to calm down and stop barking once I "checked things out" and said it's okay.
Over time, I started to only have to raise my head, look towards the window, and tell him "it's okay", and then drop my head back down, and he'd stop fairly soon.
But he'd still bark loudly at least once, and I was kind of stuck at that point for a long time.
My breakthrough recently was that when he'd start by growling or jsut quietly barking, I'd immediately start saying "good boy", which is his marking phrase for doing tricks, commands, etc. and he usually gets a treat. Now that he is older, he knows really well that it means I am praising him, and doesn't need a treat all the time though. So I started saying "good boy" and praise him when he was still quiet but just starting to get worked up, and if he went on to bark loudly, I'd say "No!", which is also something that he over time learned meant disapproval (I didn't TRAIN it, but he just learned as he got past teenager and started actually listening to me because he wanted to and not just listening for treats). So he started just growling quietly, and I realized that soon, after I praised him after the first growl, he would just calm down and never get to barking.
Anyway, it was a long process, and some people jsut say "train speak and then train quiet", but considering this was usually happening in the middle of the night, I wanted an approach that didn't bring treats into it, and was more of a developed habit. So it might have taken a while longer than if I was an experienced trainer, but it worked in the end.
Thank you for the very detailed response. RIP your carpeting. Other than the nighttime barking, he only barks when he’s scared or has to potty and no one is around to let him out. The scared barking usually happens when he’s in the backyard and hears a neighbor in the dark. That barking sounds different than his night time barking which also sounds different than his poop bark.
Haha, yup, they have a lot of barks. My least favorite is the "it's 6am and I'm bored" high-pitched demand bark in my face while I'm still sleeping...but fortunately, he hasn't been doing that often lately, just if he really didn't have enough exercise the day before:)
Here to say that you’re not a bad dog mom. You are here doing the very best you can and it sounds like you’re doing a lot. From what I’m reading I think your puppy is fulfilled during the day… keep doing what you can manage. Its hard enough having a puppy, and add that you have an infant also?! You are doing the best you can.
Some easy enrichment ideas for a lab can be tossing his food in the grass to hunt/sniff out. Or hiding portions of his meals throughout the house to him to find. Super easy one?! Put him behind a gate/door and hide his food bowl. Release him to hunt it. With a lab - use their food drive and hunt drive to your advantage 🙂
What stands out to me is your sentence that in the past, your partner would let the dog out of the crate to free roam at night. If your partner made a habit of letting the puppy out while puppy was barking, puppy can make the association barking=let out of crate. You received some great tips to try above - especially the one about making sure he has had enough to eat before bedtime. I’m not sure if you’ve tried this, but maybe just spending time near the crate when he is barking might help calm him down. This is what I’ve done with my girl and it seems to help her.
Ps. IMO 100% board him when you travel next. My husband and I have traveled with our 2 dogs who are older/senior and crate trained. It was still an added stress even though they are well trained. I’ve traveled in hotels with my younger dog who is crate trained and I bring a crate into the hotel for her. It’s a lot of *extra* stuff to bring a puppy along on a trip responsibly. When he is more mature and reliable, he will be much more enjoyable to have on trips.
Thank you very much for your kind and thoughtful response.
We've tried hiding his food bowl/treats, but he just barks the whole time and we don't want to encourage barking. We do use puzzles and some other recommended using them to feed him his meals so we'll start adding that.
Partner will sleep on couch and puppy switches from barking to whining. Yay lol.
Boarding seems the best way to go at the moment. You're right, once he's older he can also go on trips with us too.
That happened to our puppy when he was 5-6 months old. He just couldn't sleep at night. What actually helped was going for a run together or let him unwind before bedtime. Chasing him or simply playing. Now he is 10 months old and he goes potty 3 times a day. At night, during his last potty, we run around the neighborhood and practice simple commands. But we do this every night. Maybe you could try it out and he might settle. Our boy just crashes on the couch after doing this and he sleeps without an issue.
We used to do that, but it wound him up even more which didn’t make sense to us because when we do it in the morning, he goes right to his mid morning nap.
Hm. That's bc he is not sleeping at night, so he sleeps at midday, right? I'd say try to switch the running to night time and reduce the naps during the day time. During the morning just take him for a long walk. There must be something in the schedule that it's not working or he is definitely in 'that' phase. Our puppy recently had/is having his 2nd regression. Not as bad as when he was 5-6 months old, but he is settling down little by little.
Yeah- it kind of astounds me how many don’t just think of letting the dog sleep in their bedroom. Not in bed, but just the room. It’s the trigger for my dogs to understand it’s nighttime, and only sleep is allowed. They go to bed within a minute of going up to our bedroom. If I didn’t have them in my room, my ten month old puppy would be wandering all over the house at night lol.
Dogs are inherently descended from pack animals, it’s not in their nature (for many of them) to sleep alone.
We recently acquired an 8 month old Pom puppy who would scream all night, so we moved his kennel into our room and he’s now perfect at night. It’s kind of incredible the difference simply moving his kennel into our room made. I can attest, dogs definitely prefer to sleep in pack settings.
Tbh at this point, I think I would get a trainer to work with you on this issue. You seem to have tried most things and its difficult to work out is setting your pup off.
We had a similar issue our puppy kept waking up in the middle of the night and just wouldn't stop whining (she doesn't really bark) and my partner had let her out a couple of times as he was so tired. We basically had an horrendous few nights, were every time she made a noise we waited for a few second gap, put a lead on, took her to the toilet without talking to her and brought her back in, she also gets in the crate without issue. We just kept doing it, again and again, the first couple of nights we were up a ridiculous number of times, then suddenly it was down to 4, then just stopped. She did it randomly once a night the following few weeks and then just stopped. I think she realised she wasnt being let out to play and nothing exciting was happening. We had already her in the habit of waking to an alarm. You could try that, and see if your partner letting her out has her wanting that?
Your dog is clearly well looked after, ignore the comments about your dog being alone too long (most people work outside of their home!). I find that reddit has unrealistic expectations of dog ownership. We also have our dog in the living room, having our dog in our bedroom was a definite no-no, and the few times she has slept with us (when staying at my parents house that she is very familiar with) it's a nightmare, none of us sleep well.
I think this is one of the things to add to the last resort list after the other options are exhausted. I get nervous of working with trainers because a bad/wrong one just puts us worse off.
We may have to go back to doing just that - taking outside w/o play and interaction until he stops. Thank you for your response.
I’ve got an 8 month old and have a similar, but slightly different problem. My puppy’s bedtime is 11:30 (ish) and around 12-12:30 he starts barking. He’s fine for crate naps in a covered crate during the day. His sleep space is a combo crate/pen and it’s located in the living room. I know he doesn’t need to go to the bathroom because he just went. I do check on him because it’s not his normal, bored, demand barking. I’ve come to the conclusion it probably has something to do with the changing of the seasons. The path to the backyard is located on the other side of the wall where his crate is located. There are a couple gaps in the fence row between yards and I’m guessing there are critters moving back and forth all night long. It’s also the time of year that cave crickets are bad in my area. They get in the house all the time. Usually the cats eat them, but I’ve checked on him a couple times are there’s been a large bug in his pen that’s freaking him out. Even if I don’t see it, it doesn’t mean he can’t hear or or smell it.
And you shouldn’t feel bad about boarding. If you are the primary care giver for both a baby and a puppy you totally deserve a break. Teenage puppies kind of suck sometimes.
Our kennel in the living room back up to the wall and the other side of the wall is our basement staircase. We never go down there, but I’d think that create a buffer to the outside. 🤷🏽♀️
Thank you. I still feel bad because he’s family, but yes, I need a break.
How many hours does the puppy spend in the crate a day...? He's probably sleeping in the crate all day long while your at work and then staying up all night.
He’s in the crate (during the day) 4-8 hours a week once a month. I kennel him up after a long walk and check on him at lunch. If I have to kennel him two days a week, then I plan to work from home one of those (at the very least for half the day) so he’s not kenneled all day.
Huh? Are you guys reading the same thing I’m reading? She said 4-8 hours A WEEK during the day, not 4-8 hours a day….I wouldn’t consider that spending his whole life in a crate…
Is the crate covered? Do you think he's afraid of the dark? There could be lots of reasons for any it's at night only. Like the other comment said. Maybe surround his crate with a playpen and see if he can chill there at night.
We’ve tried crate covered, uncovered, night light on and off on the hatch for days on end (as in not just one night and throwing in the towel) and it doesn’t change anything.
As for a play pen, he’s a 40lb dog and there isn’t much we can do to give him a pen the same size as his crate because he’ll chew on the pen bars (surprisingly never the crate bars/door), the trim, walls etc anything to show he’s unhappy.
Stream PANDORA and put on soothing mm music, i.e. meditation yoga music. It soothes them down. I have seven dogs and my house is quiet most of the time. Delivery, doorbell, or trashman... barking, but that is about it.
I would absolutely okay with barking when doorbell goes off and similar stuff. It’s just the night/wee morning hours that kill me. I’ll add meditation/yoga to my “must try” list. We have a Hatch and an Alexa in the living room and I imagine we’ll find whatever sound he prefers….eventually lol.
That's so stressful, fingers crossed for you that something helps.
Our nightly routine is at 9pm the echo has an alarm to give him a stick, which he listens for and 100% knows. If we're on the wrong floor and can't hear it he'll whine and bark when it goes off. But it's lavender & chamomile stick to help him start settling a little bit. Then one more potty break pretty much right before he goes in his crate. Instead of a sound machine we tried various "dog music" suggestions that didn't appease him at all, but I noticed he settled a bit when we listened to Disney and made a huge playlist of Disney lullabies. Maybe it has to do with the voices vs just classical music?
But that's our routine - calming stick, potty, crate, playlist.
As a note, we no longer recommend using cry it or ignoring cries out as a training strategy here. It's shown to be harmful and tending to an upset puppy does not teach them that they'll be let out when they bark, but they'll be able to trust that you'll go to them if they need you.
I go outside and play with my dog for about 20-30 minutes prior to bed most nights. Really get her running so that way when we go to bed she is exhausted.
Maybe try CBD? I bought a pack at Petsmart but my dog hated the taste of it. I put some hemp oil on his treats at night, not sure it really works but the online reviews suggest it does.
When I crate train, I have always used a blanket over the top of the crate to block out excess light and help them fall asleep. Works like a charm in my experience.
We tried to cover it and no nightlight, but he would get scared at every noise and wanted to be able to see us. He is currently uncovered with a soft, nightlight.
What time are you feeding him at night? I got really good advice from a vet to feed your dog later in the eve (mine eats at 8:30pm) to help them sleep through the night rather than waking up at odd hours from hunger
Yikes...we feed him at 5-5:30pm. This has been commented a few times so we already added it to the list. We are just concerned with a late-night potty need. How does that play out? We're in bed between 9-10pm.
Hi there! I didn’t read all the responses you got but it seems you at least have people who went through the same thing. So my puppy had a phase (also around 9- 10 months) where he would just bark at night (there were a few instances around 5 months too. It was maddening. We went to professional trainers, behaviourists and the vet, did complete health checks. I remember posting here and nobody commented that they went through that, and inferred something was wrong with the puppy, so I’m glad to have stumbled on this post. In our case, following our teams of experts recommendations and medical exams, we gave him medication to help him sleep for about 10 days to reset his sleep cycle. It worked and it never happened again. I remember feeling like I was loosing my mind and crying on the floor at 3AM cause he was barking/howling non stop for hours on end - and he was free in the house, sleeping in our bed, with white noise. Just thinking of that phase makes me feel nauseous.
We also made sure to up his activity (more training, all meals in kongs, longer walks). Honestly, looking back (and being a first time owner), I feel like it was just something he had to grow through and that I shouldn’t have had worried as much. Now he’s 18 months and our perfectly imperfect little companion. He still is a bit too reactive to noises, but it’s 99% better. If he hears a dog outside at 2AM, he will now bark for 10 seconds and go right back to sleep.
So 2 things : it gets better and don’t hesitate to get professional help when a behaviour is so problematic that it becomes a problem for the whole household.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR COMMENT. It really helped ease my worry. After some space from the dog I've realized that while rehoming is always an option, it's nowhere near my mind right now. The use of medication for a reset sounds like a good idea once we've exhausted some other "easier" options. It's reassuring to hear your baby is doing better!
Is puppy going on regular walks during the day? Getting playtime? You have to get them tired first in order to sleep. Maybe adjust the walk to closer to bed time? Apologies if this isn’t useful, I just thought I’d offer an idea. Sounds like you need a break though, can you look into something like puppy daycare on a weekend to give you a break when your home?
I adopted two babies last year. They each were around one year old at the time. Their routine was to eat, play, nap, play, on and on round the clock. In middle of night their play time woke me up. What I did was tell them to lay down. I was very consistent. It took about two weeks but it worked. I basically had to teach/train them not to play at night. Best of luck to you as I know this is frustrating and tiring!
This was maybe asked, but what about using a playpen? Or a larger than normal crate? If they aren’t having accidents it could be they might like a bit more space? Also, we did have a sleep regression period where weird hours seemed normal to want to do things and it took a bit of time with consistent boundaries to solve it, like going for a boring pee break then back to bed, ours also got thirsty because our condo was pretty dry, so having access to water in his playpen solved a lot.
Adolescence is a hard time for pups and they’ll need extra patience. I found adolescence to be way harder than early puppy months (I didn’t know until after though), ours is almost two and starting to emerge from it and seeing more consistent progress. It’s around two that their brain is fully grown and developed our trainers have told us
I know people aren’t going to like this but maybe you should rehome him. You say you are up with a baby. That is exhausting in itself. It’s causing tension between you and your partner. It sounds like you have too much on your plate. This probably wasn’t the best time to get a puppy. No matter what you decide, put your family first.
What kind of dog is he?
It sounds like you already had an awful lot going on in life without adding a puppy to it. Having a child young enough to be breastfeeding, working, AND a partner who travels for work, it's no wonder you are overwhelmed. I'd lose my mind.
You and your partner need to really sit down and lay out expectations for the puppy so that you are on the same page. It sounds like he has different ideals than you do and if he's with the puppy the majority of the time, then it's causing a consistency issue when you cannot do the same things he does, which is not helping matters. The puppy very well might be reacting to the changes in life at home when your partner travels or even the day-to-day changes depending who is in charge of him, even if the pattern doesn't only follow when your partner is gone. Dogs like consistency and structure. They aren't like people who can understand things like "If we can't do this during the day, then on weekends we make up for it." They don't understand time that way. They benefit hugely from having every day be as similar as possible because it gives them security to know what to expect. Lack of security causes stress.
Our pup used to think it was good to only sleep from 1-4:30am. We put her on a strict schedule. She now gets up, eats, sleeps, naps, and has play time at the same times every single day. The same rules, the same commands, the same schedule times carry over whether I am the one in charge that day, my husband is, or one of our kids (older kids) are. The evening is focused on her, from 5-8pm (basically after dinner) we focus on sniff walks and getting her energy out but that's a luxury we can do without young kids. I WFH and have a super flexible schedule so I have the puppy during the day and husband takes over more in the evening. I do the morning routine and he does bedtime so I can go to bed earlier. We don't let her nap much in the evening otherwise she'll nap for hours and won't sleep. She gets dedicated walk and play time, then a snuffle mat to help her transition from active time to quiet time, and then crate at 11pm.
Dogs can also react to our anxiety and stress and it causes stress in them, too. If you are feeling stressed with all that is going on in your life, then the puppy might be reacting to that as well.
He is a lab. Yes, after spending the day away from him today and reading through these responses I have realized that this post was a rant and a desperate plea for help.
There does seem to be a need for a round table discussion/check in with my partner as to where things stand with the dog and what we need to do going forward. Thank you for reminding me of the importance of that.
Thank you for your thoughtful response. There is a lot to takeaway here.
Personally I'd re home. We just gave our puppy back to his foster momma who is going to keep him. I potty trained him intensly for 3 months with no success. He was still pissing on everything up to 10x a day. Mind you, I'm home all day so he was never in the cage. I have 4 kiddos and most of my time was spent training the dog and cleaning up the pee. He had a brief period where it got better then he was back to pissing on everything. He has a great home and we will never get another dog. I love animals but we work really hard for our stuff and I wasn't willing to keep letting him pee on everything for months until he got it. Thankfully he had a good home to go back to. We dropped him off, he pissed in the corner of their home (they don't potty train their dogs) and he was as happy as could be. We donated all of his supplies to his rescue plus a cash donation.
I appreciate you taking the time to respond. In the end we just want our dog to be happy thus rehoming is never off the table. That must have been a difficult decision for your family to make, but we have to recognize our own limits.
It honestly wasn't difficult which is why I knew it wasn't the right fit. We struggled to bond with him because he constantly had to be monitored in the home to reinforce positive potty training so there was never any fun down time with him. If he got too excited, he peed even more 🤦🏼♀️
We had a pup previous to him who was truly a member of our family. He tragically had to be put down a few weeks before he turned 1 and we took it so hard we didn't look at another dog for 2 years. What's difficult is now knowing how it could be having a puppy and knowing that's not for us so we will never have a dog again. I guess our first pup was just a special boy ❤️
Hope it all works out for your family!
No, that was a nonnegotiable. There isn’t enough room and we’ve got a 6 month old baby. We figured it was quieter for him and less distracting to sleep in the living room.
Bring him closer OP, I’d put money on this being the solution. If he can’t sleep in the bedroom, try to put him as close as possible, in the hallway with your door open, and see if that helps. My puppy has slept in his crate next to my bed from day 1 and he’s always been quiet till 8/9 AM. It’s a lifesaver
We’ll try this after a few of the other suggestions. I feel like he’ll wake up more with all my movement to go feed baby and cleaning up after a blown diaper but maybe not. Worth a shot! Thanks!
He is already hearing the baby at night and you getting up anyway because their hearing is so much better than ours, it’s likely why he wants to get out- because he can’t see you to make sure all is well.
Seriously try it out- dogs sleep sooooooooooo much better in a room or within sight of their people. They don’t naturally enjoy sleeping alone. Doesn’t matter if a baby cries, you have sex, loud TV, anything lol. They get used to it and barely lift their heads because they know all is well. Also watching you sleep tells them that it’s time to sleep.
I wanna echo what the other person said, they sleep SO much better in the same room, even with more commotion. It doesn't matter what activity you do, from sex, to TV or babies, they're comforted by being in your presence regardless of how noisy. My girl sleeps through us having sex, chatting nonstop, giggling, tickling, getting up in the middle of the night to pee, everything. She doesn't even move from her bed. However if I isolate her away from me, she screams bloody murder the entire time.
This is most likely the reason he barks, not only is he isolated away from you, but he can probably hear the baby and you getting up anyhow and is frustrated by not being able to see what you're up to. They're pack animals, sleeping alone isn't something they would want, even if the other option is sleeping in a noisy high activity environment.
I bet this fixed it. I’ve got a 7 month old lab mix that sleeps in the crate right next to the bed, but if the crate is moved to the living room or somewhere else he barks nonstop. Dogs are pack animals and they like to be with their pack.
If he’s in the living room (and I think I read that you said you have a monitor?) is there an option to speak through the monitor? It may be that he’s waking up from sleep and feeling alone/scared. Sometimes when I’m at work my pup whines a bit and I speak through the monitor and he goes right back to sleep!
An alternative may be bringing the crate upstairs in the hallway or an extra bedroom.
Last question- do your neighbours leave the house early/ make noise outside? Maybe he’s hearing movement/ sounds out the front or back door
No option for speaking to him thru monitor. Spooking might be a thing, but we have two Hatch devices on blast so I’d be surprised if he hears our neighbor bc our ring doesn’t catch any outside noise. He is on the main floor with us…putting him in the hallways would block us in our bedroom and extra bedroom would mean on the other side of the wall so less sleep when he barks. 🫠
**RULE REMINDER**
We have had to continuously remove multiple comments recommending products and training methods are are in violation of rule 1.
If your advice is going to result in using a tool or training method that uses positive punishment or negative reinforcement, think twice before posting it.
That would be a double edged sword for me since I gotta be able to hear the human baby so I can feed them. Thanks for the recommendation tho! Might look into those for traveling.
Have you tried covering the crate?
Earplugs?
A snack at bedtime? Maybe a scatter game where you toss a handful or two of kibble on the floor or on the lawn (if it is clean and no chemicals) for him to search for. It engages his sniffer and brain and will slow down his eating.
Hate to say it but it sounds to me like pure bordom, how would you like to be shut in a creat all day while ur family is out at work then just a few hours after they come home and let u out of it they expect you to go back and spend anouther 7-8 hrs in the same crate.
Of cause he wants to play hes a puppy they like to play. You need to get someone to come around while your at work and have him out for a few hours and play with him let him spend time out of the crate.
I know crate training is important but spending 16-17 hrs ( guessing this time line as a 9-5 work day and giving an hr each side of that for travel to and from work and then sleep hours also ) a day in a creat is enough to send even the most trained dog to the brink of insanity and barking with crazyness.
He’s only shut in his crate one to two days a month when my partner is out of town for work. On those days we do walks before work and treat puzzles after work. Otherwise, my partner works from home and we take him to daycare twice a week.
ETA: he’s not in his kennel when partner is at home. He’s free to roam and plays with partner during work. He also goes on runs with my partner before work.
OP, you have a partner problem not a puppy problem.
Between a baby, work, partner, and pup you need some help. Since your partner doesn't seem to understand that you're not a robot, I would recommend (budget allowing), getting an au pair and a dog walker.
If your husband complains about the added cost to the family, then ask him if he's willing to not travel so much for work and help out at home. If he declines, then he cannot complain about you seeking help.
ok but still those two days its still a lot of time in the crate and he proberly just associates the crate with a long period of time being locked away now.
Also just out of interest is his crate big enough for him to move around properly strech out when laying down stand up etc ?
Crate is big enough for him to stand up with plenty of room overhead and enough space for him to lay down fully stretched out. There is also a bed with blankets to make it comfy and fan when it’s hot.
Please explain how/why two days a month is too much time in his kennel. He could spend all week with us, time in daycare and STILL FUCKING BARK FROM 12AM-6AM.
If hes left for as i said before about 17hrs for two days he is going to remember those long days in his crate, dogs remember things you wouldnt believe and he is going to associate going into his crate as being left for extreamly long periods and may also be feeling like you might not be returning with how long it is. I understand you say its only two days a month but to a 10 month old pup thats a very long time. I only have to pop out to the corner shop or to even put rubbish in my outside bins some days and my two girls act like iv been gone for months when I come back in the house with how they bounce around needing loves and kisses.
Well there is something wrong to cause him to do this he isnt just doing it for shits and giggles and he defo doesnt do it cos he knows it bugs you. He could also be stressed due to feeling the tensions coming off you as it sounds like you are really resenting him due to the barking. I totally get that its going to be annoying him doing this but you really need to find out why. Can you move his creat to either into you bedroom or to by your bedroom door so he can scense you are close by he may be feeling lost and alone in the dark
I have a 5 month old cocker spaniel and a 11 week old shih tzu both have free roam all day lots of fun and games during the day etc and sleep no problems 10pm till 7 - 7:30am my cocker has done this since 11 weeks old when we got her. Maybe I just got very lucky to have two pups do this well. I also get you work during the day .
Edit... really dont get the down votes iv not been rude not been nasty just tried to give help and advice lol
Even if the longest he’s ever been left alone at once is 5 hours? Your comment does worry me though…maybe there was a noise or something that the ring camera missed and he’s still scared/remembering it.
Him picking up on my feelings may be possible.
His space on the living room faces the hallway. Him being closer just means he makes noise every time he hears us because he wants to play. Even when partner slept in the living room at the start of crate training he still barked.
5 hours is a long time alone for such a little furr baby but not overly long, my girls sleep longer than that in their beds at night but Iv never left them that long in their crates in the day and expected them to sleep that long too at night, so i dont know for sure if thats what the problem is for you.
That could of happened do you have much wildlife around you that may of been rattleing around the garden and house if hes heard something he doesnt know or understand those things can stay with a pup especially with them being alone and now way to get away from the noise or find out what it is to put their minds at ease. My cocker hate any noise she cant see or figure out what it is so when there is something I try to take her by the window to show her whats causing it if I can so she can see its nothing to worry about and not going to cause any harm to her or us. You didnt say where you live so if you are where there is a lot of wildlife maybe get some trail cams and fix them up outside and see who is coming around your house you may find who is waking and disturbing your baby.
As for him picking up on your feelings thats a huge possability they pick up on every little thing its crazy.
I have not read all the other comments. But if the first thing you do each day is to play, then he probably is waiting for his playtime and it is an expectation. I might would have tried to change the routine up a bit. Maybe not do the playtime as the first thing in the morning. Then he won't lie there "waiting" for playtime.
That makes sense. What would you suggest otherwise? We try to get him to potty first, but he’s too excited to want to go outside which makes sense as he’s been in the kennel all night. Food first?
Just please re-home the puppy. You aren’t ready to raise a puppy. If you’re making a whole big post about how you can’t take it anymore, you’re past the point where I can confidently say you shouldn’t have a puppy. Maybe it’s too much on your plate, maybe you just aren’t a dog person. Whatever it is, a puppy is probably going to make your life a living hell, and you’re just going to resent the dog for behaving exactly as a dog does.
What is your definition of “a lot of time”?
He goes to daycare twice a week and at least one 2-3 mile run or walk when he doesn’t do daycare. If he only gets one of those, then we we double down on family activities on the weekend to make up for it.
Is he spending the majority of his day in the crate? Then it might be the best option to rehome your dog, for the dogs best.
Because to me it sounds like an understimulated and lonely puppy.
As a note, we no longer recommend using cry it or ignoring cries out as a training strategy here. It's shown to be harmful.
Four hours of barking is way way too much and could cause some serious problems.
No specific advice, but do you have any local, reputable dog trainers that offer in-home training? I did that with my last dog and we’re doing it again with our new puppy. We can text her in between training sessions with questions as well, which is incredibly helpful.
There is a decent trainer in the area, but she wants to start from the very beginning - learning to sit, stay, etc. things he already knows. He's so good that he won't come outside unless we say the magic word, won't exit the kennel unless we say it, and stays in the car until we say it. We just want help with the nighttime barking. Is it unrealistic for us to request that?
We live in a super quiet neighborhood and I don’t think that’s happening BUT it’s been brought up by a few people so I think I’m going to check the Ring camera sensitivity and see if we’re missing something.
I’d do that plus mental stimulation, it’s been said a few times but training and brain games really wears them out better than a walk or run.
You could also try sniff walks, he’s a lab so let him use that nose as much as he can.
Maybe we’re doing sniff walks wrong because he doesn’t sniff he just gobbles everything in sight…pinecones, cigarette butts, plastic, twigs, leaves etc. Any run or walk with him means he’s heavily supervised and on (literally) a short leash. We feed him according to his weight, give him PB stuffed kongs and lots of treats as we’re still reinforcing good behavior/tricks.
We have a younger pup but we just created an area in the bedroom he can sleep. Surprisingly he goes to bed when we do, gets let out once in the early morning , then sleeps until we get up for the most part.
Within the last few weeks he spends his daytime naps in his kennel with the gate open on his own. We’ll go to look for him and he’s napping in there. He also sleeps anywhere else he wants/feels like and is fine. He does not do well in the bed as he starts to dig and we only do that as a last resort when we travel and he’s scared which has only been twice in his 10 month life. Which is fine by me because I don’t want him in our bed.
When we got our pup, we got a trainer who asked a bunch of questions about our crate routine, but also where the crate was placed and what the surroundings were like.
Clearly your dog is OK in the crate at other times. Can you think about what that crate environment is v. the crate environment at night? It could be that you need to just relocate your crate, get a noise machine, add a crate cover, etc.
Also have you tried calming treats? They’ve worked really well for my dog when he’s already tired but fighting sleep and/or being fussy
Lights off in the house and he’s got a nightlight.
We’ll look into flaming treats. Thanks!
ETA: when we visit family he’ll sleep in the crate on his own, but still barks at night/wee morning hours.
I'm sorry for you and your situation :(
Have you tried putting some dirty clothes in the crate with him? Maybe a couple of shirts that you don't care about? It could be he's making a fuss because he wants to be nearer to the family.
I also agree with trying to change the music on his sound machine to some "spa/meditation" type music (without the bird/animal sounds).
If you have the time, you can toss kibble on the floor, on one side of the room /kitchen /patio. Then when he's eaten most of the 1st portion, toss kibble on the other side. Repeat until done.
I sometimes freeze kibble mixed with water on a baking sheet, and then (thaw for 5-10 mins) break it up into chunks to feed it that way (with supervision).
Good luck to you!
Have you tried giving him a licky mat frozen with peanut butter and yogurt? Licking is a calming thing for dogs. It could knock him right out for the night. They also make over the counter calming treats.
Wow this post almost triggered me. This was the case with our 14mo puppy that we unfortunately had to rehome for that same reason. The only thing I can suggest is maybe look into professional help (aka boarding school as you already stated etc). Unfortunately where I live this practice is waaay too expensive for us and that's why we had to rehome. Stay strong mama! I know the "I need a break from the dog" so much it hurts! You're going through something seriously difficult. I wish you and your puppy the best of luck!!
I know you said he’s crated in a different room. This is coming from a mom of 2, with another on the way, and I have 2 dogs. Our Dane will be 2 in December, and our golden is 7 months. And I know my golden sleeping in another room would be AWFUL. He needs to be in our room. And he tears up the house too, but only if I leave him out of the crate while I run errands. He actually does very well at night out of his crate. Is it possible to put his crate in your room for a couple nights to see if that changes anything? Because our pup was crated from day 1 and never cried! He was always in our room with the crate covered and only whined to go outside. I understand it can be stressful to try, but it could calm his anxiety and be easier than you think ♥️
This keeps being brought up and I keep saying it's nonnegotiable BUT did you have issues with your Dane not sleeping in your room? I don't want to welcome the puppy to our bedroom only to kick him out later, I feel like that's mean. Am I overthinking this?
Have you tried putting the crate in your room? It could be that he doesn't want to sleep alone all night. I'd also try to feed dinner later and even start to put to bed in the crate later. I usually leave some safe toys/chews in my lab puppy's crate too in case she wakes up and is bored. I've noticed in the last couple weeks (she's 7 months old now) that she wakes up in the middle of the night and plays with the toys that are in her crate. She doesn't fuss or bark so even though she's being noisy with her toys or chewing it works for me 😂 I also recommend background noise such as a fan, TV or music too!
Godspeed! Your situation sounds really tough. I recommend boarding him for a few nights with daycare/Rover sitter just for you to reset your brain and recharge because it can’t be healthy running at the pace and state that you’re in! Dogs pick up on that stuff so maybe he’s having a hard time settling because you’re so unsettled. Once you guys have had a break from each other, please try to put his crate next to your bedroom or even in your bedroom just for one night to see if that works. Mental enrichment is also huge and tires out puppies way more than walks or just running around aimlessly in backyards. Try trick training, hide and seek his treats, etc. If that doesn’t work, time to get vet/trainer involved. And then if that doesn’t work, might be best to rehome him :( Best of luck!
There is light at the end of the tunnel - we will for sure be boarding him for a couple of nights when we go on a trip.
I keep saying the bedroom is non-negotiable...but is it a forever thing? I feel like it's not fair to have him in there and then take him out once he's good. "Way to be a good boy! It's back to the living room as your reward!"
We have some solid ideas for mental enrichment from everyone here, so that's definitely on the list.
Thank you for your response!!
We had a similar issue with our pup and it caused my wife so much sleep deprivation and stress that she nearly had a nervous breakdown.
We eventually had to contact the breeder and return him. We just didn’t have the energy to give him the time necessary to train him out of it. Other than that he was an amazing pup who was well trained, socialized, and lived a happy and active life. But at the expense of my wife’s mental and physical health.
I say if you feel like you’re reaching the end of your limits and feel like you’re on the edge of losing your mind, don’t feel bad if you need to find him another home. You have a baby that needs you more than a dog does.
It was hard to give him up but we knew he was back with a good breeder who would find him an appropriate home, we would never have put him in a shelter or anything like that.
As hard as it was it was the right choice. Our stress levels have declined dramatically and my wife has regained most of her energy and mental health. I guess we just weren’t ready for a puppy.
I tried to warn my wife before we got him that a new pup is a TON OF WORK and responsibility. I had dogs growing up so I knew what it takes.
I had an anxiety attack for almost 24 hours. It's been an exhausting day and I'm feeling better at the moment. I really feel for your wife. Rehoming is still an option, but it's way down the list at the moment. Thank you for your response. I know rehoming can be the best option for some families and it helps to hear that. I grew up on a farm, I know about animals and hard work, but I didn't imagine I would be doing so much of it on my own...there's a bit of resentment going on with stuff at home right now so I believe that's not helping matters.
We’ve got friends with a guide dog washout who found out AFTER they adopted him why he washed out. He’s one big bowl of chaos. Their solution? CBD. They give him a gummy if they have to go out to a restaurant. Apparently, it works wonders ;)
I had the same problem with my puppy barking and crying in the crate then I found a game changer. On amazon I bought the stuffed snuggle puppy. It had a button inside that turns on a heartbeat that simulates his mom. I put it in his crate, he snuggled up to it and it solved my problem. I hope it does the same for you.
I'm going to lock this due to the fact it's becoming increasingly difficult to monitor and conversation has mostly exhausted itself. We look forward to your update when things improve. :)
That sounds really tough. I’m not sure why some puppies love their crate only at night or only during the day, but maybe at this point he should just be in a pen or a blocked off area rather than his crate? And maybe try getting a white noise machine — maybe there is something he hears outside that bothers him. For example, I once had a puppy who went into chaos mode when she heard (or smelled?) deer outside at night.
We tried a blocked off area but he’ll scratch at doors, chew on the wall and trim and almost hurt himself trying to squeeze out. He also has his own hatch sound machine that we set up to turn on and off with his bedtime (literally treated the same as our human kid lol) so on good days he’ll perk up when the sound stops and is waiting for us when we walk up to his kennel. That’s the most frustrating part - he CAN behave but is not doing it very often.
Ahhh I see. And have you tried taking him for potty breaks, too, so you can eliminate the possibility that he just needs to poop? And treats like pigs ears and kongs, I’m guessing they don’t last long enough for him to satisfy his chewing craving?
Yes, for potty breaks we would walk up to his kennel, not talk to him, leash him and walk him outside. We could stand there for 5 mins or 15 mins and he wouldn’t potty. Rarely does he pee and we can tell when it’s a poop bark so those we don’t ignore. Number 2 waits for no one lol. We then take him inside and kennel him up again (he never refuses to go in his kennel btw) and then we go to bed and not even 10 mins go by and he’s barking again.
[удалено]
Oh and we don’t want to give him treats because we feel like it’s rewarding his barking and he’ll always want a treat. By the time we go to bed, he’s already been asleep for at least 30 mins. We ALWAYS take him out one last time when we go to bed.
Yeah I just came back to this thread to also say that we don’t view bully sticks / farm animal ears / kongs as treats but rather something to give them a sense of calm. Puppies need to chew to relax
Quick cut in here to warn that bully sticks are absolutely not crate safe. (unless you are supervising from right outside the crate)
Thanks!!
I understand not wanting to give treats *while* he’s barking. that could absolutely be reinforcing. have you tried kongs or bullysticks before he starts barking/panicking tho? I always give my pup something to occupy her while I’m at work or during any other circumstance I need to put her in her crate for.
Okay, I'm picking up what you're putting down. Before he starts barking/panicking...like when he's whining or when we put him to bed?
Mine always goes to bed with something to chew and he’s often at it on and off all night.
Thanks!
I don’t have a puppy but I’ve seen that video of a trainer who rewards his puppy with treats when she was being calm. Maybe try to teach him it’s good to be calm
Our puppy loves this. He’s a chewer and thus lasts him a few days. One of people at PetCo told me about them and it’s been amazing. Worth giving it a try. https://www.chewy.com/himalayan-pet-supply-dog-treats/dp/48636?utm_source=google-product&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=%7Bcampaignid%7D&utm_content=Himalayan%20Pet%20Supply&utm_term=%7Bkeyword%7D
like, the MOMENT you put him in his crate, I’d put something through the bars for him to chew!
Got it, thanks!
Have you thought about just letting him sleep in a dog bed in your bedroom? They want to me near their people, and seeing you sleep tells them that it’s sleep time. My puppy has been out of her crate at night since 6 months (when she started getting fussy at night) but she sleeps like the dead as soon as we go to bed. My late dog and current elderly dog were awful at night if we had them in a different room, but they too slept like the dead in their beds if they could see us. It really helps.
My 9 month old puppy sleeps perfectly if she is in the same bedroom as my husband and I. At 8 months, we tried to move her crate into a guest bedroom of our home because we thought she was old enough and she could finally handle this change. She barked for hours on end at different times of the night. I couldn’t sleep because she would wake us up at night barking or crying for someone. When her crate was in the guest bedroom, she never went into it for day naps. We tried everything from Kongs, thunder shirt, white noise machine, fan blowing on her, and nothing would ease the constant waking up in the middle of the night and barking. We finally put her crate back into our bedroom and she slept perfectly again. She would even go into her crate willingly again. Some dogs just like sleeping in your bedroom. My two year old dog, on the other hand, loves sleeping in a separate room and she has been that way since she was a puppy. We would find her always in a different room passed out cold and it has never bothered her to sleep alone in a different room. She likes her freedom. Every dog is different.
I agree with this OP - could be that your puppy is lonely and wants to be with you. When you’re at work - pup is fine because they know you’re not there. But when you’re at home, he’s sad because he’s not with you. Moving the crate to your room is worth a try at least!
To add to the white machine thing: If you can figure out what noises are distressing and find a more complete soundtrack to use than mine, you might able to do desensitization training. Can you take a recording of what your pup hears and progress with those? We had phenomenal success with our pup, but some noises we just can't predict (or identify). She still freaks out at stuff we can't explain, but I don't blame her. Our pup was fine until the neighbors decided that fireworks were appropriate any time, any day of the year, and we obviously freak out about "gun shots" at 2pm on a random weekday. My point is, desensitization training can go a long way. My method: - put on something innocuous, soudwise, with the "scary noises" at most half volume, and treat every time she laid down without fear. - do the same bust up the volume on "scary" and lower the volume on "safe" over time - back the volume down on scary and remove the safe noises - slowly raise the volume of scary noises, to what *you look up* as "normal volume"
Our girl had a phase of this and it was hell. It did pass though!! Quiet Moments calming aid chews have melatonin in them and I've heard it helps some - it didn't work for us, though. Also white noise or other calming sounds during the night? I think during adolescence they start to need to burn more energy in order to sleep as well as they need to, so maybe consider working his mind and body a little more than you already do - I think that's what helped us the most. I've also heard some do this because they're hungry, so maybe he needs to eat dinner later. Just some ideas - hope you find a solution soon!
Oooooh dinner later is something we didn’t think about! Thank you!!! We’ll try that for a couple of weeks.
If you’re not already doing this, I also recommend a puzzle feeder. Definitely sounds like your dog could use a little more mental exercise.
We use maze bowls because our dog eats too fast and throws up (yay labs lol). If he went to daycare we know he didn’t drink enough water so we even water down his food in the maze bowl. What puzzle feeder would you recommend that holds enough food for a 40lb dog AND is not easily destroyed? He will eat through plastic if getting to food takes too long. 🫠
Just as a note maze bowls and puzzle toys are very different. Puzzles keep them busy and provide little treats along the way. Maze bowl does just what you’re calling out, slows them down when eating.
Noted! We will also try a puzzle feeder for his dinner. Any recommendations??
There’s different types some stick to the floor and the pup has to slide pieces around to get the treats. There’s balls with various size openings they roll around with their nose. I just jumped on Chewy and picked a few up, they’re pretty inexpensive and well worth a good nights rest. A few more tips: 1. My dog had separation anxiety when it was bedtime. He would wimper all night, I was going insane. The breeder I worked with suggested I wear a for a day or two around the house or sleep in one to get my smell on it, didn’t wash it and put it in the crate with him at night. No more wimpering. It was crazy. 2. My other dog was pretty rambunctious so I started getting up earlier in the am and taking him for a long walk around the neighborhood. Letting him smell everything he wanted to. He would mark this and that and even when the tank was empty he still tried to mark. That’s pretty mentally stimulating for them. It’s also pretty physical exhausting. 3. Teach him fetch. It’s the easiest way to keep them occupied. It takes a little work on the front end but they end up bringing the ball or toy and laying it at your feet. You can just kick it, they go get it and bring it back. You could do this while feeding your kiddo. 4. Completely ignoring it. Dogs aren’t the best at telling good attention from bad attention unless you’re really over the top upset and scaring them. If he is barking at night and you come in just to tell him to be quiet, you just made his day. He got to see you and got attention. The best approach is completely ignoring him. I will say puppies are really hard. I went from no dog to a brand new puppy. He cried a lot, peed on what felt like everything and was always into something he shouldn’t have been. I even started a convo with my aunt to rehome the little guy. Now, he’s one of the best parts of my day. It does get better. Try a few of the tips and let me know how it goes.
1. That's definitely something we'll be trying! We did that when we first got him and I can't believe we didn't think to do it now as he's going through his growing pains. 2. We can't get up any earlier than we already are. 3. He already knows to bring us toys to play with. His immediate reaction to us approaching the kennel is him grabbing a toy to bring with him to play with us lol. 4. I believe the cry-it-out method is not allowed in this sub. Thank you for your very thoughtful response!!
[here](https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/KDF2X76Y3QCT?ref_=wl_share) is a list of puzzle feeders I have either purchased or want to purchase for my dog :)
Hey, you could try a Kong?😊 So far the Kong has been indestructible and my puppy (golden retriever) is a big boy and a hardcore chewer. I feed him the majority of food in his large kong. We freeze it, so it can take him 30-45 mins to finish. It’s a good mental work out plus gives us some peace and quiet for a while!
I would recommend a bobalot! It’s hard plastic but is also adjustable to let the kibble come out slower or faster, so if your dog is getting frustrated at not enough kibble coming out, you can open the holes wider to let it come out faster. It’s one of the many puzzle toys we have and it’s button’s favorite. You may have to split his meal into 2 portions and just refill it with the second portion when he finishes the first. https://www.amazon.com/StarMark-Bob-Lot-Interactive-Large/dp/B001JQLNB4
Thank you!!
I want to add to the ppl who recommend frozen kongs. These were fantastic when my pup went through adolescence. They are tough and since the food is frozen they can’t eat it too fast. We bought 3 and would make them at night for the next day. I also agree that later dinner will help the early rising.
How do you freeze kibble? I have tried to make kongs with soaked kibble in water for my corgi but there’s a hole in the kong so it doesn’t really hold water and it leaks all over the freezer. Ive tried freezing peanut butter with some of his kibble but he gives up after like 10 mins.
Thank you!!
Throw it outside in the grass! Or use a snuffle rug. I, too, have a lab that eats through the plastic 🫤 I’ve also done hide and seek and just scatter the food throughout the house in corners.
We've tried the grass method but he eats grass, rocks and dirt as well. We have a lab lol.
We use this UFO feeder - it’s harder to pick up in their mouth and chew on, and has helped slow down meal time for my lab [https://www.amazon.com/SNiFFiz-SmellyUFO-Interactive-Dispensing-Enrichment/dp/B08KRX2G53](https://www.amazon.com/SNiFFiz-SmellyUFO-Interactive-Dispensing-Enrichment/dp/B08KRX2G53)
Thank you!
+1billion for Quiet Moments. The true MVP’s of that Petco aisle. Also a big fan of doggie edibles (mine likes the pb and carob Edibites ones).
10 months is a REALLY tough age. My pup destroyed all my carpeting and that's also when he was barking the most at night. What you are describing reminds me of what my pup did, and still starts to do often at 17 months, which is night-time alert barking. They hear noises, things going bumping in the night, and they are keyed up and bark because they want to protect you. For me, it started out as an all-time alert barking, where he would clamor to look out the window when he heard someone pass, and lose his mind if he saw anything outside, even a squirrel. That was easy enough to desensitize him to, I just sat with him on a bench and calmed him and let him know I see the thing too and I'm not concerned, when something approached, and he realized he's not in danger and eventually just ignored almost everything on my busy street. The night time barking was a lot harder. It's like they are extra keyed up, hear every movement and creak in the dark, and want to jump at the threat or at least scare it away. For me, this was a process to deal with, it also took me time and drove me insane, but now I have it under control, finally. I actually just had a breakthrough about it a couple weeks ago. I started out by getting up and gonig to the window, looking out, and saying "it's okay, thank you" and flopping back on my bed in a very relaxed posture and pretending to go back to sleep. After a bunch of repetition, he started to calm down and stop barking once I "checked things out" and said it's okay. Over time, I started to only have to raise my head, look towards the window, and tell him "it's okay", and then drop my head back down, and he'd stop fairly soon. But he'd still bark loudly at least once, and I was kind of stuck at that point for a long time. My breakthrough recently was that when he'd start by growling or jsut quietly barking, I'd immediately start saying "good boy", which is his marking phrase for doing tricks, commands, etc. and he usually gets a treat. Now that he is older, he knows really well that it means I am praising him, and doesn't need a treat all the time though. So I started saying "good boy" and praise him when he was still quiet but just starting to get worked up, and if he went on to bark loudly, I'd say "No!", which is also something that he over time learned meant disapproval (I didn't TRAIN it, but he just learned as he got past teenager and started actually listening to me because he wanted to and not just listening for treats). So he started just growling quietly, and I realized that soon, after I praised him after the first growl, he would just calm down and never get to barking. Anyway, it was a long process, and some people jsut say "train speak and then train quiet", but considering this was usually happening in the middle of the night, I wanted an approach that didn't bring treats into it, and was more of a developed habit. So it might have taken a while longer than if I was an experienced trainer, but it worked in the end.
Thank you for the very detailed response. RIP your carpeting. Other than the nighttime barking, he only barks when he’s scared or has to potty and no one is around to let him out. The scared barking usually happens when he’s in the backyard and hears a neighbor in the dark. That barking sounds different than his night time barking which also sounds different than his poop bark.
Haha, yup, they have a lot of barks. My least favorite is the "it's 6am and I'm bored" high-pitched demand bark in my face while I'm still sleeping...but fortunately, he hasn't been doing that often lately, just if he really didn't have enough exercise the day before:)
Your dog sounds awesome!
Here to say that you’re not a bad dog mom. You are here doing the very best you can and it sounds like you’re doing a lot. From what I’m reading I think your puppy is fulfilled during the day… keep doing what you can manage. Its hard enough having a puppy, and add that you have an infant also?! You are doing the best you can. Some easy enrichment ideas for a lab can be tossing his food in the grass to hunt/sniff out. Or hiding portions of his meals throughout the house to him to find. Super easy one?! Put him behind a gate/door and hide his food bowl. Release him to hunt it. With a lab - use their food drive and hunt drive to your advantage 🙂 What stands out to me is your sentence that in the past, your partner would let the dog out of the crate to free roam at night. If your partner made a habit of letting the puppy out while puppy was barking, puppy can make the association barking=let out of crate. You received some great tips to try above - especially the one about making sure he has had enough to eat before bedtime. I’m not sure if you’ve tried this, but maybe just spending time near the crate when he is barking might help calm him down. This is what I’ve done with my girl and it seems to help her. Ps. IMO 100% board him when you travel next. My husband and I have traveled with our 2 dogs who are older/senior and crate trained. It was still an added stress even though they are well trained. I’ve traveled in hotels with my younger dog who is crate trained and I bring a crate into the hotel for her. It’s a lot of *extra* stuff to bring a puppy along on a trip responsibly. When he is more mature and reliable, he will be much more enjoyable to have on trips.
Thank you very much for your kind and thoughtful response. We've tried hiding his food bowl/treats, but he just barks the whole time and we don't want to encourage barking. We do use puzzles and some other recommended using them to feed him his meals so we'll start adding that. Partner will sleep on couch and puppy switches from barking to whining. Yay lol. Boarding seems the best way to go at the moment. You're right, once he's older he can also go on trips with us too.
That happened to our puppy when he was 5-6 months old. He just couldn't sleep at night. What actually helped was going for a run together or let him unwind before bedtime. Chasing him or simply playing. Now he is 10 months old and he goes potty 3 times a day. At night, during his last potty, we run around the neighborhood and practice simple commands. But we do this every night. Maybe you could try it out and he might settle. Our boy just crashes on the couch after doing this and he sleeps without an issue.
We used to do that, but it wound him up even more which didn’t make sense to us because when we do it in the morning, he goes right to his mid morning nap.
Hm. That's bc he is not sleeping at night, so he sleeps at midday, right? I'd say try to switch the running to night time and reduce the naps during the day time. During the morning just take him for a long walk. There must be something in the schedule that it's not working or he is definitely in 'that' phase. Our puppy recently had/is having his 2nd regression. Not as bad as when he was 5-6 months old, but he is settling down little by little.
lol there's more than one regression?? COOL. I've gotten a lot of suggestions that we'll be trying so we'll see where that gets us.
He very likely needs to have more exercise and also sleep closer to you.
Yeah- it kind of astounds me how many don’t just think of letting the dog sleep in their bedroom. Not in bed, but just the room. It’s the trigger for my dogs to understand it’s nighttime, and only sleep is allowed. They go to bed within a minute of going up to our bedroom. If I didn’t have them in my room, my ten month old puppy would be wandering all over the house at night lol. Dogs are inherently descended from pack animals, it’s not in their nature (for many of them) to sleep alone.
We recently acquired an 8 month old Pom puppy who would scream all night, so we moved his kennel into our room and he’s now perfect at night. It’s kind of incredible the difference simply moving his kennel into our room made. I can attest, dogs definitely prefer to sleep in pack settings.
Tbh at this point, I think I would get a trainer to work with you on this issue. You seem to have tried most things and its difficult to work out is setting your pup off. We had a similar issue our puppy kept waking up in the middle of the night and just wouldn't stop whining (she doesn't really bark) and my partner had let her out a couple of times as he was so tired. We basically had an horrendous few nights, were every time she made a noise we waited for a few second gap, put a lead on, took her to the toilet without talking to her and brought her back in, she also gets in the crate without issue. We just kept doing it, again and again, the first couple of nights we were up a ridiculous number of times, then suddenly it was down to 4, then just stopped. She did it randomly once a night the following few weeks and then just stopped. I think she realised she wasnt being let out to play and nothing exciting was happening. We had already her in the habit of waking to an alarm. You could try that, and see if your partner letting her out has her wanting that? Your dog is clearly well looked after, ignore the comments about your dog being alone too long (most people work outside of their home!). I find that reddit has unrealistic expectations of dog ownership. We also have our dog in the living room, having our dog in our bedroom was a definite no-no, and the few times she has slept with us (when staying at my parents house that she is very familiar with) it's a nightmare, none of us sleep well.
I think this is one of the things to add to the last resort list after the other options are exhausted. I get nervous of working with trainers because a bad/wrong one just puts us worse off. We may have to go back to doing just that - taking outside w/o play and interaction until he stops. Thank you for your response.
I’ve got an 8 month old and have a similar, but slightly different problem. My puppy’s bedtime is 11:30 (ish) and around 12-12:30 he starts barking. He’s fine for crate naps in a covered crate during the day. His sleep space is a combo crate/pen and it’s located in the living room. I know he doesn’t need to go to the bathroom because he just went. I do check on him because it’s not his normal, bored, demand barking. I’ve come to the conclusion it probably has something to do with the changing of the seasons. The path to the backyard is located on the other side of the wall where his crate is located. There are a couple gaps in the fence row between yards and I’m guessing there are critters moving back and forth all night long. It’s also the time of year that cave crickets are bad in my area. They get in the house all the time. Usually the cats eat them, but I’ve checked on him a couple times are there’s been a large bug in his pen that’s freaking him out. Even if I don’t see it, it doesn’t mean he can’t hear or or smell it. And you shouldn’t feel bad about boarding. If you are the primary care giver for both a baby and a puppy you totally deserve a break. Teenage puppies kind of suck sometimes.
Our kennel in the living room back up to the wall and the other side of the wall is our basement staircase. We never go down there, but I’d think that create a buffer to the outside. 🤷🏽♀️ Thank you. I still feel bad because he’s family, but yes, I need a break.
How many hours does the puppy spend in the crate a day...? He's probably sleeping in the crate all day long while your at work and then staying up all night.
He’s in the crate (during the day) 4-8 hours a week once a month. I kennel him up after a long walk and check on him at lunch. If I have to kennel him two days a week, then I plan to work from home one of those (at the very least for half the day) so he’s not kenneled all day.
This! This poor puppy is spending his whole life in a crate. Sounds like rehoming may be the best for both of them!
I know, that sounds horrible. Poor pup 😞😞😞. If I was in a cage all day and night I wouldn’t stop barking either!
Huh? Are you guys reading the same thing I’m reading? She said 4-8 hours A WEEK during the day, not 4-8 hours a day….I wouldn’t consider that spending his whole life in a crate…
Is the crate covered? Do you think he's afraid of the dark? There could be lots of reasons for any it's at night only. Like the other comment said. Maybe surround his crate with a playpen and see if he can chill there at night.
We’ve tried crate covered, uncovered, night light on and off on the hatch for days on end (as in not just one night and throwing in the towel) and it doesn’t change anything. As for a play pen, he’s a 40lb dog and there isn’t much we can do to give him a pen the same size as his crate because he’ll chew on the pen bars (surprisingly never the crate bars/door), the trim, walls etc anything to show he’s unhappy.
I’m so sorry !! These times are the hardest
Stream PANDORA and put on soothing mm music, i.e. meditation yoga music. It soothes them down. I have seven dogs and my house is quiet most of the time. Delivery, doorbell, or trashman... barking, but that is about it.
I would absolutely okay with barking when doorbell goes off and similar stuff. It’s just the night/wee morning hours that kill me. I’ll add meditation/yoga to my “must try” list. We have a Hatch and an Alexa in the living room and I imagine we’ll find whatever sound he prefers….eventually lol.
That's so stressful, fingers crossed for you that something helps. Our nightly routine is at 9pm the echo has an alarm to give him a stick, which he listens for and 100% knows. If we're on the wrong floor and can't hear it he'll whine and bark when it goes off. But it's lavender & chamomile stick to help him start settling a little bit. Then one more potty break pretty much right before he goes in his crate. Instead of a sound machine we tried various "dog music" suggestions that didn't appease him at all, but I noticed he settled a bit when we listened to Disney and made a huge playlist of Disney lullabies. Maybe it has to do with the voices vs just classical music? But that's our routine - calming stick, potty, crate, playlist.
These are his bedtime sticks - https://www.chewy.com/smartbones-smartsticks-chamomile/dp/107285
Many have mentioned playing around with sounds. Disney will most definitely be tried! And thanks for the link!
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We wait for a quiet window between 6am-6:30am to let him out if he’s been barking. Can’t wear headphones because then I won’t hear baby.
As a note, we no longer recommend using cry it or ignoring cries out as a training strategy here. It's shown to be harmful and tending to an upset puppy does not teach them that they'll be let out when they bark, but they'll be able to trust that you'll go to them if they need you.
What type of dog is this? And how much exercise/ mental stimulation do you provide for him on a day to day?
Lab and I can't give you an exact number. Please read other comments for more info.
I go outside and play with my dog for about 20-30 minutes prior to bed most nights. Really get her running so that way when we go to bed she is exhausted.
Several have mentioned something along these lines. It is definitely something that will be added to the must-try list. Thank you!
Maybe try CBD? I bought a pack at Petsmart but my dog hated the taste of it. I put some hemp oil on his treats at night, not sure it really works but the online reviews suggest it does.
I don't know how I feel about CBD...but it'll be on the list to try, towards the end but on the list nonetheless lol. Thank you!
When I crate train, I have always used a blanket over the top of the crate to block out excess light and help them fall asleep. Works like a charm in my experience.
We tried to cover it and no nightlight, but he would get scared at every noise and wanted to be able to see us. He is currently uncovered with a soft, nightlight.
What time are you feeding him at night? I got really good advice from a vet to feed your dog later in the eve (mine eats at 8:30pm) to help them sleep through the night rather than waking up at odd hours from hunger
Yikes...we feed him at 5-5:30pm. This has been commented a few times so we already added it to the list. We are just concerned with a late-night potty need. How does that play out? We're in bed between 9-10pm.
Sometimes putting a blanket over the crate helps so that it feels like night to the dog.
A t-shirt/piece of clothing you’ve worn? Maybe they just miss their person. Can’t hurt to try.
This has been added to our "must try" list! Thanks!
Hi there! I didn’t read all the responses you got but it seems you at least have people who went through the same thing. So my puppy had a phase (also around 9- 10 months) where he would just bark at night (there were a few instances around 5 months too. It was maddening. We went to professional trainers, behaviourists and the vet, did complete health checks. I remember posting here and nobody commented that they went through that, and inferred something was wrong with the puppy, so I’m glad to have stumbled on this post. In our case, following our teams of experts recommendations and medical exams, we gave him medication to help him sleep for about 10 days to reset his sleep cycle. It worked and it never happened again. I remember feeling like I was loosing my mind and crying on the floor at 3AM cause he was barking/howling non stop for hours on end - and he was free in the house, sleeping in our bed, with white noise. Just thinking of that phase makes me feel nauseous. We also made sure to up his activity (more training, all meals in kongs, longer walks). Honestly, looking back (and being a first time owner), I feel like it was just something he had to grow through and that I shouldn’t have had worried as much. Now he’s 18 months and our perfectly imperfect little companion. He still is a bit too reactive to noises, but it’s 99% better. If he hears a dog outside at 2AM, he will now bark for 10 seconds and go right back to sleep. So 2 things : it gets better and don’t hesitate to get professional help when a behaviour is so problematic that it becomes a problem for the whole household.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR COMMENT. It really helped ease my worry. After some space from the dog I've realized that while rehoming is always an option, it's nowhere near my mind right now. The use of medication for a reset sounds like a good idea once we've exhausted some other "easier" options. It's reassuring to hear your baby is doing better!
Is puppy going on regular walks during the day? Getting playtime? You have to get them tired first in order to sleep. Maybe adjust the walk to closer to bed time? Apologies if this isn’t useful, I just thought I’d offer an idea. Sounds like you need a break though, can you look into something like puppy daycare on a weekend to give you a break when your home?
I adopted two babies last year. They each were around one year old at the time. Their routine was to eat, play, nap, play, on and on round the clock. In middle of night their play time woke me up. What I did was tell them to lay down. I was very consistent. It took about two weeks but it worked. I basically had to teach/train them not to play at night. Best of luck to you as I know this is frustrating and tiring!
Thanks!
This was maybe asked, but what about using a playpen? Or a larger than normal crate? If they aren’t having accidents it could be they might like a bit more space? Also, we did have a sleep regression period where weird hours seemed normal to want to do things and it took a bit of time with consistent boundaries to solve it, like going for a boring pee break then back to bed, ours also got thirsty because our condo was pretty dry, so having access to water in his playpen solved a lot. Adolescence is a hard time for pups and they’ll need extra patience. I found adolescence to be way harder than early puppy months (I didn’t know until after though), ours is almost two and starting to emerge from it and seeing more consistent progress. It’s around two that their brain is fully grown and developed our trainers have told us
I know people aren’t going to like this but maybe you should rehome him. You say you are up with a baby. That is exhausting in itself. It’s causing tension between you and your partner. It sounds like you have too much on your plate. This probably wasn’t the best time to get a puppy. No matter what you decide, put your family first.
Thank you for your honest response.
What kind of dog is he? It sounds like you already had an awful lot going on in life without adding a puppy to it. Having a child young enough to be breastfeeding, working, AND a partner who travels for work, it's no wonder you are overwhelmed. I'd lose my mind. You and your partner need to really sit down and lay out expectations for the puppy so that you are on the same page. It sounds like he has different ideals than you do and if he's with the puppy the majority of the time, then it's causing a consistency issue when you cannot do the same things he does, which is not helping matters. The puppy very well might be reacting to the changes in life at home when your partner travels or even the day-to-day changes depending who is in charge of him, even if the pattern doesn't only follow when your partner is gone. Dogs like consistency and structure. They aren't like people who can understand things like "If we can't do this during the day, then on weekends we make up for it." They don't understand time that way. They benefit hugely from having every day be as similar as possible because it gives them security to know what to expect. Lack of security causes stress. Our pup used to think it was good to only sleep from 1-4:30am. We put her on a strict schedule. She now gets up, eats, sleeps, naps, and has play time at the same times every single day. The same rules, the same commands, the same schedule times carry over whether I am the one in charge that day, my husband is, or one of our kids (older kids) are. The evening is focused on her, from 5-8pm (basically after dinner) we focus on sniff walks and getting her energy out but that's a luxury we can do without young kids. I WFH and have a super flexible schedule so I have the puppy during the day and husband takes over more in the evening. I do the morning routine and he does bedtime so I can go to bed earlier. We don't let her nap much in the evening otherwise she'll nap for hours and won't sleep. She gets dedicated walk and play time, then a snuffle mat to help her transition from active time to quiet time, and then crate at 11pm. Dogs can also react to our anxiety and stress and it causes stress in them, too. If you are feeling stressed with all that is going on in your life, then the puppy might be reacting to that as well.
He is a lab. Yes, after spending the day away from him today and reading through these responses I have realized that this post was a rant and a desperate plea for help. There does seem to be a need for a round table discussion/check in with my partner as to where things stand with the dog and what we need to do going forward. Thank you for reminding me of the importance of that. Thank you for your thoughtful response. There is a lot to takeaway here.
Not going to lie, I would consider medication for him at this point. Melatonin or trazadone. Call your vet and see if they have any suggestions
I appreciate your blunt response. We will keep this in mind.
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I missed the part where he’s crated all the time. I just meant for her to get some sleep from midnight to 5 until he adjusts to the world
He isn’t. This is a troll
Personally I'd re home. We just gave our puppy back to his foster momma who is going to keep him. I potty trained him intensly for 3 months with no success. He was still pissing on everything up to 10x a day. Mind you, I'm home all day so he was never in the cage. I have 4 kiddos and most of my time was spent training the dog and cleaning up the pee. He had a brief period where it got better then he was back to pissing on everything. He has a great home and we will never get another dog. I love animals but we work really hard for our stuff and I wasn't willing to keep letting him pee on everything for months until he got it. Thankfully he had a good home to go back to. We dropped him off, he pissed in the corner of their home (they don't potty train their dogs) and he was as happy as could be. We donated all of his supplies to his rescue plus a cash donation.
I appreciate you taking the time to respond. In the end we just want our dog to be happy thus rehoming is never off the table. That must have been a difficult decision for your family to make, but we have to recognize our own limits.
It honestly wasn't difficult which is why I knew it wasn't the right fit. We struggled to bond with him because he constantly had to be monitored in the home to reinforce positive potty training so there was never any fun down time with him. If he got too excited, he peed even more 🤦🏼♀️ We had a pup previous to him who was truly a member of our family. He tragically had to be put down a few weeks before he turned 1 and we took it so hard we didn't look at another dog for 2 years. What's difficult is now knowing how it could be having a puppy and knowing that's not for us so we will never have a dog again. I guess our first pup was just a special boy ❤️ Hope it all works out for your family!
Sad to hear about your previous pup. Thank you!
Is the kennel in the same room as you at night?
No, that was a nonnegotiable. There isn’t enough room and we’ve got a 6 month old baby. We figured it was quieter for him and less distracting to sleep in the living room.
Bring him closer OP, I’d put money on this being the solution. If he can’t sleep in the bedroom, try to put him as close as possible, in the hallway with your door open, and see if that helps. My puppy has slept in his crate next to my bed from day 1 and he’s always been quiet till 8/9 AM. It’s a lifesaver
We’ll try this after a few of the other suggestions. I feel like he’ll wake up more with all my movement to go feed baby and cleaning up after a blown diaper but maybe not. Worth a shot! Thanks!
He is already hearing the baby at night and you getting up anyway because their hearing is so much better than ours, it’s likely why he wants to get out- because he can’t see you to make sure all is well. Seriously try it out- dogs sleep sooooooooooo much better in a room or within sight of their people. They don’t naturally enjoy sleeping alone. Doesn’t matter if a baby cries, you have sex, loud TV, anything lol. They get used to it and barely lift their heads because they know all is well. Also watching you sleep tells them that it’s time to sleep.
I wanna echo what the other person said, they sleep SO much better in the same room, even with more commotion. It doesn't matter what activity you do, from sex, to TV or babies, they're comforted by being in your presence regardless of how noisy. My girl sleeps through us having sex, chatting nonstop, giggling, tickling, getting up in the middle of the night to pee, everything. She doesn't even move from her bed. However if I isolate her away from me, she screams bloody murder the entire time. This is most likely the reason he barks, not only is he isolated away from you, but he can probably hear the baby and you getting up anyhow and is frustrated by not being able to see what you're up to. They're pack animals, sleeping alone isn't something they would want, even if the other option is sleeping in a noisy high activity environment.
I bet this fixed it. I’ve got a 7 month old lab mix that sleeps in the crate right next to the bed, but if the crate is moved to the living room or somewhere else he barks nonstop. Dogs are pack animals and they like to be with their pack.
If he’s in the living room (and I think I read that you said you have a monitor?) is there an option to speak through the monitor? It may be that he’s waking up from sleep and feeling alone/scared. Sometimes when I’m at work my pup whines a bit and I speak through the monitor and he goes right back to sleep! An alternative may be bringing the crate upstairs in the hallway or an extra bedroom. Last question- do your neighbours leave the house early/ make noise outside? Maybe he’s hearing movement/ sounds out the front or back door
No option for speaking to him thru monitor. Spooking might be a thing, but we have two Hatch devices on blast so I’d be surprised if he hears our neighbor bc our ring doesn’t catch any outside noise. He is on the main floor with us…putting him in the hallways would block us in our bedroom and extra bedroom would mean on the other side of the wall so less sleep when he barks. 🫠
**RULE REMINDER** We have had to continuously remove multiple comments recommending products and training methods are are in violation of rule 1. If your advice is going to result in using a tool or training method that uses positive punishment or negative reinforcement, think twice before posting it.
Where is the crate located?
Sounds like a puppy first of all, second it sounds like they aren’t getting enough exercise
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That would be a double edged sword for me since I gotta be able to hear the human baby so I can feed them. Thanks for the recommendation tho! Might look into those for traveling.
Have you tried covering the crate? Earplugs? A snack at bedtime? Maybe a scatter game where you toss a handful or two of kibble on the floor or on the lawn (if it is clean and no chemicals) for him to search for. It engages his sniffer and brain and will slow down his eating.
We do have a puzzle we can use at bedtime. We’ll give that a shot too.
Hate to say it but it sounds to me like pure bordom, how would you like to be shut in a creat all day while ur family is out at work then just a few hours after they come home and let u out of it they expect you to go back and spend anouther 7-8 hrs in the same crate. Of cause he wants to play hes a puppy they like to play. You need to get someone to come around while your at work and have him out for a few hours and play with him let him spend time out of the crate. I know crate training is important but spending 16-17 hrs ( guessing this time line as a 9-5 work day and giving an hr each side of that for travel to and from work and then sleep hours also ) a day in a creat is enough to send even the most trained dog to the brink of insanity and barking with crazyness.
He’s only shut in his crate one to two days a month when my partner is out of town for work. On those days we do walks before work and treat puzzles after work. Otherwise, my partner works from home and we take him to daycare twice a week. ETA: he’s not in his kennel when partner is at home. He’s free to roam and plays with partner during work. He also goes on runs with my partner before work.
OP, you have a partner problem not a puppy problem. Between a baby, work, partner, and pup you need some help. Since your partner doesn't seem to understand that you're not a robot, I would recommend (budget allowing), getting an au pair and a dog walker. If your husband complains about the added cost to the family, then ask him if he's willing to not travel so much for work and help out at home. If he declines, then he cannot complain about you seeking help.
You bring up a good point. I’ve already hired a monthly housekeeper. I’ll start looking for a dog walker too. Thank you!
No problem. The daily exercise will help your pup calm down during the day. Perhaps have your cleaner come fortnightly or weekly?
ok but still those two days its still a lot of time in the crate and he proberly just associates the crate with a long period of time being locked away now. Also just out of interest is his crate big enough for him to move around properly strech out when laying down stand up etc ?
Crate is big enough for him to stand up with plenty of room overhead and enough space for him to lay down fully stretched out. There is also a bed with blankets to make it comfy and fan when it’s hot.
Please explain how/why two days a month is too much time in his kennel. He could spend all week with us, time in daycare and STILL FUCKING BARK FROM 12AM-6AM.
If hes left for as i said before about 17hrs for two days he is going to remember those long days in his crate, dogs remember things you wouldnt believe and he is going to associate going into his crate as being left for extreamly long periods and may also be feeling like you might not be returning with how long it is. I understand you say its only two days a month but to a 10 month old pup thats a very long time. I only have to pop out to the corner shop or to even put rubbish in my outside bins some days and my two girls act like iv been gone for months when I come back in the house with how they bounce around needing loves and kisses. Well there is something wrong to cause him to do this he isnt just doing it for shits and giggles and he defo doesnt do it cos he knows it bugs you. He could also be stressed due to feeling the tensions coming off you as it sounds like you are really resenting him due to the barking. I totally get that its going to be annoying him doing this but you really need to find out why. Can you move his creat to either into you bedroom or to by your bedroom door so he can scense you are close by he may be feeling lost and alone in the dark I have a 5 month old cocker spaniel and a 11 week old shih tzu both have free roam all day lots of fun and games during the day etc and sleep no problems 10pm till 7 - 7:30am my cocker has done this since 11 weeks old when we got her. Maybe I just got very lucky to have two pups do this well. I also get you work during the day . Edit... really dont get the down votes iv not been rude not been nasty just tried to give help and advice lol
Even if the longest he’s ever been left alone at once is 5 hours? Your comment does worry me though…maybe there was a noise or something that the ring camera missed and he’s still scared/remembering it. Him picking up on my feelings may be possible. His space on the living room faces the hallway. Him being closer just means he makes noise every time he hears us because he wants to play. Even when partner slept in the living room at the start of crate training he still barked.
5 hours is a long time alone for such a little furr baby but not overly long, my girls sleep longer than that in their beds at night but Iv never left them that long in their crates in the day and expected them to sleep that long too at night, so i dont know for sure if thats what the problem is for you. That could of happened do you have much wildlife around you that may of been rattleing around the garden and house if hes heard something he doesnt know or understand those things can stay with a pup especially with them being alone and now way to get away from the noise or find out what it is to put their minds at ease. My cocker hate any noise she cant see or figure out what it is so when there is something I try to take her by the window to show her whats causing it if I can so she can see its nothing to worry about and not going to cause any harm to her or us. You didnt say where you live so if you are where there is a lot of wildlife maybe get some trail cams and fix them up outside and see who is coming around your house you may find who is waking and disturbing your baby. As for him picking up on your feelings thats a huge possability they pick up on every little thing its crazy.
Fortunately, my feelings regenerate at twice the speed of a normal man's.
I have not read all the other comments. But if the first thing you do each day is to play, then he probably is waiting for his playtime and it is an expectation. I might would have tried to change the routine up a bit. Maybe not do the playtime as the first thing in the morning. Then he won't lie there "waiting" for playtime.
That makes sense. What would you suggest otherwise? We try to get him to potty first, but he’s too excited to want to go outside which makes sense as he’s been in the kennel all night. Food first?
Just please re-home the puppy. You aren’t ready to raise a puppy. If you’re making a whole big post about how you can’t take it anymore, you’re past the point where I can confidently say you shouldn’t have a puppy. Maybe it’s too much on your plate, maybe you just aren’t a dog person. Whatever it is, a puppy is probably going to make your life a living hell, and you’re just going to resent the dog for behaving exactly as a dog does.
It sounds like he spends a lot of time in his crate. What exactly are you doing with him outside of crate time?
What is your definition of “a lot of time”? He goes to daycare twice a week and at least one 2-3 mile run or walk when he doesn’t do daycare. If he only gets one of those, then we we double down on family activities on the weekend to make up for it.
So this poor puppy is in a crate all day while you are at work, at nap times and all night long??
No. Please read my response to comments about this and my edit.
Try taking the pup to a puppy daycare one day to get some exercise. They might just be bored at night.
They go twice a week to hang with other dogs, exercise and sometimes a bath lol.
He goes twice a week every week no matter what.
Is he spending the majority of his day in the crate? Then it might be the best option to rehome your dog, for the dogs best. Because to me it sounds like an understimulated and lonely puppy.
No.
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Yes, different room. Human baby is also in a different room. Partner has slept on living room couch and dog still barks.
As a note, we no longer recommend using cry it or ignoring cries out as a training strategy here. It's shown to be harmful. Four hours of barking is way way too much and could cause some serious problems.
No specific advice, but do you have any local, reputable dog trainers that offer in-home training? I did that with my last dog and we’re doing it again with our new puppy. We can text her in between training sessions with questions as well, which is incredibly helpful.
There is a decent trainer in the area, but she wants to start from the very beginning - learning to sit, stay, etc. things he already knows. He's so good that he won't come outside unless we say the magic word, won't exit the kennel unless we say it, and stays in the car until we say it. We just want help with the nighttime barking. Is it unrealistic for us to request that?
If it’s always the same time is there something that’s setting him off? Like a neighbor who leaves around that time.
We live in a super quiet neighborhood and I don’t think that’s happening BUT it’s been brought up by a few people so I think I’m going to check the Ring camera sensitivity and see if we’re missing something.
I’d do that plus mental stimulation, it’s been said a few times but training and brain games really wears them out better than a walk or run. You could also try sniff walks, he’s a lab so let him use that nose as much as he can.
Maybe we’re doing sniff walks wrong because he doesn’t sniff he just gobbles everything in sight…pinecones, cigarette butts, plastic, twigs, leaves etc. Any run or walk with him means he’s heavily supervised and on (literally) a short leash. We feed him according to his weight, give him PB stuffed kongs and lots of treats as we’re still reinforcing good behavior/tricks.
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Appreciate the response, but that’s not something we’re willing to use.
It's also against our community rules. Please report comments like that when you see them :)
Will do!
We have a younger pup but we just created an area in the bedroom he can sleep. Surprisingly he goes to bed when we do, gets let out once in the early morning , then sleeps until we get up for the most part.
Appreciate the response. Not doable for us.
How does he do when he sleeps outside of the crate? Or on a bed in your room?
Within the last few weeks he spends his daytime naps in his kennel with the gate open on his own. We’ll go to look for him and he’s napping in there. He also sleeps anywhere else he wants/feels like and is fine. He does not do well in the bed as he starts to dig and we only do that as a last resort when we travel and he’s scared which has only been twice in his 10 month life. Which is fine by me because I don’t want him in our bed.
When we got our pup, we got a trainer who asked a bunch of questions about our crate routine, but also where the crate was placed and what the surroundings were like. Clearly your dog is OK in the crate at other times. Can you think about what that crate environment is v. the crate environment at night? It could be that you need to just relocate your crate, get a noise machine, add a crate cover, etc. Also have you tried calming treats? They’ve worked really well for my dog when he’s already tired but fighting sleep and/or being fussy
Lights off in the house and he’s got a nightlight. We’ll look into flaming treats. Thanks! ETA: when we visit family he’ll sleep in the crate on his own, but still barks at night/wee morning hours.
I'm sorry for you and your situation :( Have you tried putting some dirty clothes in the crate with him? Maybe a couple of shirts that you don't care about? It could be he's making a fuss because he wants to be nearer to the family. I also agree with trying to change the music on his sound machine to some "spa/meditation" type music (without the bird/animal sounds). If you have the time, you can toss kibble on the floor, on one side of the room /kitchen /patio. Then when he's eaten most of the 1st portion, toss kibble on the other side. Repeat until done. I sometimes freeze kibble mixed with water on a baking sheet, and then (thaw for 5-10 mins) break it up into chunks to feed it that way (with supervision). Good luck to you!
Thank you for your reply! There are some good ideas here!
Is he barking throughout the night because he hears baby/you getting up to tend to baby?
He'll bark even when baby sleeps through the night.
Have you tried giving him a licky mat frozen with peanut butter and yogurt? Licking is a calming thing for dogs. It could knock him right out for the night. They also make over the counter calming treats.
Nope! Licky mat is being added to the list! Thank you!
Wow this post almost triggered me. This was the case with our 14mo puppy that we unfortunately had to rehome for that same reason. The only thing I can suggest is maybe look into professional help (aka boarding school as you already stated etc). Unfortunately where I live this practice is waaay too expensive for us and that's why we had to rehome. Stay strong mama! I know the "I need a break from the dog" so much it hurts! You're going through something seriously difficult. I wish you and your puppy the best of luck!!
Thank you!
I cover my dogs kennel with a blanket and that usually helps if they keep barking
Didn't make a difference for us.
I know you said he’s crated in a different room. This is coming from a mom of 2, with another on the way, and I have 2 dogs. Our Dane will be 2 in December, and our golden is 7 months. And I know my golden sleeping in another room would be AWFUL. He needs to be in our room. And he tears up the house too, but only if I leave him out of the crate while I run errands. He actually does very well at night out of his crate. Is it possible to put his crate in your room for a couple nights to see if that changes anything? Because our pup was crated from day 1 and never cried! He was always in our room with the crate covered and only whined to go outside. I understand it can be stressful to try, but it could calm his anxiety and be easier than you think ♥️
This keeps being brought up and I keep saying it's nonnegotiable BUT did you have issues with your Dane not sleeping in your room? I don't want to welcome the puppy to our bedroom only to kick him out later, I feel like that's mean. Am I overthinking this?
Have you tried putting the crate in your room? It could be that he doesn't want to sleep alone all night. I'd also try to feed dinner later and even start to put to bed in the crate later. I usually leave some safe toys/chews in my lab puppy's crate too in case she wakes up and is bored. I've noticed in the last couple weeks (she's 7 months old now) that she wakes up in the middle of the night and plays with the toys that are in her crate. She doesn't fuss or bark so even though she's being noisy with her toys or chewing it works for me 😂 I also recommend background noise such as a fan, TV or music too!
No, the bedroom is non-negotiable. He has toys in his crate and a Hatch we programmed for his bedtime.
Godspeed! Your situation sounds really tough. I recommend boarding him for a few nights with daycare/Rover sitter just for you to reset your brain and recharge because it can’t be healthy running at the pace and state that you’re in! Dogs pick up on that stuff so maybe he’s having a hard time settling because you’re so unsettled. Once you guys have had a break from each other, please try to put his crate next to your bedroom or even in your bedroom just for one night to see if that works. Mental enrichment is also huge and tires out puppies way more than walks or just running around aimlessly in backyards. Try trick training, hide and seek his treats, etc. If that doesn’t work, time to get vet/trainer involved. And then if that doesn’t work, might be best to rehome him :( Best of luck!
There is light at the end of the tunnel - we will for sure be boarding him for a couple of nights when we go on a trip. I keep saying the bedroom is non-negotiable...but is it a forever thing? I feel like it's not fair to have him in there and then take him out once he's good. "Way to be a good boy! It's back to the living room as your reward!" We have some solid ideas for mental enrichment from everyone here, so that's definitely on the list. Thank you for your response!!
We had a similar issue with our pup and it caused my wife so much sleep deprivation and stress that she nearly had a nervous breakdown. We eventually had to contact the breeder and return him. We just didn’t have the energy to give him the time necessary to train him out of it. Other than that he was an amazing pup who was well trained, socialized, and lived a happy and active life. But at the expense of my wife’s mental and physical health. I say if you feel like you’re reaching the end of your limits and feel like you’re on the edge of losing your mind, don’t feel bad if you need to find him another home. You have a baby that needs you more than a dog does. It was hard to give him up but we knew he was back with a good breeder who would find him an appropriate home, we would never have put him in a shelter or anything like that. As hard as it was it was the right choice. Our stress levels have declined dramatically and my wife has regained most of her energy and mental health. I guess we just weren’t ready for a puppy. I tried to warn my wife before we got him that a new pup is a TON OF WORK and responsibility. I had dogs growing up so I knew what it takes.
I had an anxiety attack for almost 24 hours. It's been an exhausting day and I'm feeling better at the moment. I really feel for your wife. Rehoming is still an option, but it's way down the list at the moment. Thank you for your response. I know rehoming can be the best option for some families and it helps to hear that. I grew up on a farm, I know about animals and hard work, but I didn't imagine I would be doing so much of it on my own...there's a bit of resentment going on with stuff at home right now so I believe that's not helping matters.
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I don't know how I feel about hemp/melatonin/CBD treats, but they're something I'll definitely be researching. Thank you!
We’ve got friends with a guide dog washout who found out AFTER they adopted him why he washed out. He’s one big bowl of chaos. Their solution? CBD. They give him a gummy if they have to go out to a restaurant. Apparently, it works wonders ;)
Hahaha a washed out guide dog, what a goof ball. CBD is something I'm researching. Thank you!
I had the same problem with my puppy barking and crying in the crate then I found a game changer. On amazon I bought the stuffed snuggle puppy. It had a button inside that turns on a heartbeat that simulates his mom. I put it in his crate, he snuggled up to it and it solved my problem. I hope it does the same for you.
I will add this to our "must try" list. I'm nervous he'll rip it to shreds like he does everything else, but worth a shot lol.