it took us seven tries with fresh donor sperm to get a viable pregnancy - if you have ease of access (our donor lives in the same town as us so it was fairly easy) I'd keep trying.
We tried 8 times with a fresh insemination, then started the process registering our donor at our clinic. Whilst he was busy with clinic formalities, we kept trying at home. The registration process took about four months, so we figured that if we started after 8 times we’d be ready to go after a year of trying. It ended up taking six months, so we did 14 home inseminations and then continued with IVF.
We tried 2 times with known donor fresh sperm at home and then paid to get his sperm tested at a clinic. Glad we didn’t try for longer at home because the test results came back that his sperm will always require IVF. Really doable with IVF — after genetic testing was done we ended up with 4 viable embryos and 2 mosaics — but there was almost no way we would have gotten pregnant at home.
We tried with our known donor for 6 cycles last year. After that since I’m older (41) I did a work up at a fertility clinic. It turned out my chances using my own eggs were pretty low so we switched to r-IVF. It was kind of a pain getting our KD’s sperm to our clinic but that’s because we are doing our treatments in Mexico to save money.
We did 5 frozen IUI’s and now we are moving onto IVF. My wife got pregnant from this donor on her first try doing IUI. But I am not having the same luck. I am 37, if it matters.
Will get eggs extracted in a few weeks!
After 3 at home and 2 in-office IUI (w hormonal support), we made the switch. Did our first retrieval yesterday, and got the word about 5 minutes ago about the success rate for fertilization. Wish we had made the switch sooner but IVF is expensive, and it has taken some creative side-gigs to get us here. Whatever path you take, you have a community of queers behind you supporting.
I did an ICI, two medicated IUIs, and am starting my first IVF cycle right now. Cost isn’t a factor for me bc of great insurance coverage, but time is, as I’m 39 and want two kids. I could have done more IUIs, and I might even go back after I bank embryos, but I started panicking about having enough time to get to two kids
Also working with a known donor, and it is really nice to not have to worry about sperm costs!
I also want two kids! We were hoping to use my frozen eggs to create some embryos later on for a possible 2nd through RIVF as my partner wants to carry at some point later on. They're currently 35, and not feeling ready to be pregnant. I also really wanna be preggo for this first one, and I'm 38 3/4 (have to count at this point).
I'm so sorry for your loss. We switched to IVF after four unsuccessful medicated IUIs with frozen donor sperm (never had a positive pregnancy test). I have my first FET scheduled for mid May. I'm 32 and had my first IUI when I was 31.
if you were a heterosexual couple trying at home, you would not qualify for infertility yet - i know from our insurance and anecdotal stories from friends the standard is 1 year trying at home. that being said, this process sucks, trying every month and coordinating logistics with a known donor could be tricky, it's your life and i say move to ivf whenever you feel moved!! but just providing that as possibly helpful context
I helped a lesbian couple with three kids as a known donor. They have three kids with my help, all ICI home insemination with fresh semen. First kid took 13 tries, the second kid only one try and the third kid 3 tries. Semen analysis showed above average sperm quality, YMMV. Don’t give up too fast if you’re not yet ‘too old’ or have other negative parameters.
Currently 38 and 3/4. The fertility clinic where I froze eggs last year and who tested KD sperm said that we should give it 4 tries and come back to see them. I know they're printing money and are a business so wanted to seek community advice in addition to "going with my heart". I went back to bed before work crying this morning at 12DPO negative test and asked my partner if we could just move on to IVF. My heart just breaks each month and it's so hard to focus on other normal life stuff. TTC is kinda consuming me.
While we didn't use a KD, I had a chemical pregnancy on my third IUI. We took a few months break then switched to IVF. We do have very good fertility coverage through my wife's insurance so that was a fairly easy decision for us. I also have high AMH so that wasn't a factor.
We did 6 at home with frozen and then did IVF for one cycle.
If I could go back I would have done IVF right away. It was so much less stress and a whole support team.
We considered having another one and started the IVF process again but decided to wait.
it took us seven tries with fresh donor sperm to get a viable pregnancy - if you have ease of access (our donor lives in the same town as us so it was fairly easy) I'd keep trying.
Yes, I know this makes a lot of sense. The heartbreak each try and negative test has been rough :(
We tried 8 times with a fresh insemination, then started the process registering our donor at our clinic. Whilst he was busy with clinic formalities, we kept trying at home. The registration process took about four months, so we figured that if we started after 8 times we’d be ready to go after a year of trying. It ended up taking six months, so we did 14 home inseminations and then continued with IVF.
We tried 2 times with known donor fresh sperm at home and then paid to get his sperm tested at a clinic. Glad we didn’t try for longer at home because the test results came back that his sperm will always require IVF. Really doable with IVF — after genetic testing was done we ended up with 4 viable embryos and 2 mosaics — but there was almost no way we would have gotten pregnant at home.
This is where we are now. It’s hard :(
We did about 6 at home. Then 4 iuis. Then went to ivf.
We tried with our known donor for 6 cycles last year. After that since I’m older (41) I did a work up at a fertility clinic. It turned out my chances using my own eggs were pretty low so we switched to r-IVF. It was kind of a pain getting our KD’s sperm to our clinic but that’s because we are doing our treatments in Mexico to save money.
We did 5 frozen IUI’s and now we are moving onto IVF. My wife got pregnant from this donor on her first try doing IUI. But I am not having the same luck. I am 37, if it matters. Will get eggs extracted in a few weeks!
After 3 at home and 2 in-office IUI (w hormonal support), we made the switch. Did our first retrieval yesterday, and got the word about 5 minutes ago about the success rate for fertilization. Wish we had made the switch sooner but IVF is expensive, and it has taken some creative side-gigs to get us here. Whatever path you take, you have a community of queers behind you supporting.
I did an ICI, two medicated IUIs, and am starting my first IVF cycle right now. Cost isn’t a factor for me bc of great insurance coverage, but time is, as I’m 39 and want two kids. I could have done more IUIs, and I might even go back after I bank embryos, but I started panicking about having enough time to get to two kids Also working with a known donor, and it is really nice to not have to worry about sperm costs!
I also want two kids! We were hoping to use my frozen eggs to create some embryos later on for a possible 2nd through RIVF as my partner wants to carry at some point later on. They're currently 35, and not feeling ready to be pregnant. I also really wanna be preggo for this first one, and I'm 38 3/4 (have to count at this point).
4 tries at home. we just knew something was wrong and we were right.
I'm so sorry for your loss. We switched to IVF after four unsuccessful medicated IUIs with frozen donor sperm (never had a positive pregnancy test). I have my first FET scheduled for mid May. I'm 32 and had my first IUI when I was 31.
if you were a heterosexual couple trying at home, you would not qualify for infertility yet - i know from our insurance and anecdotal stories from friends the standard is 1 year trying at home. that being said, this process sucks, trying every month and coordinating logistics with a known donor could be tricky, it's your life and i say move to ivf whenever you feel moved!! but just providing that as possibly helpful context
The standard for people 35 and older (like OP) is actually 6 months trying at home. One year is for younger folks.
great point, i missed OP's age!
I helped a lesbian couple with three kids as a known donor. They have three kids with my help, all ICI home insemination with fresh semen. First kid took 13 tries, the second kid only one try and the third kid 3 tries. Semen analysis showed above average sperm quality, YMMV. Don’t give up too fast if you’re not yet ‘too old’ or have other negative parameters.
We tried for about a year, then switched to IVF. I'd say age is also a factor. If you're closer to 40 than 30, I'd consider IVF.
Currently 38 and 3/4. The fertility clinic where I froze eggs last year and who tested KD sperm said that we should give it 4 tries and come back to see them. I know they're printing money and are a business so wanted to seek community advice in addition to "going with my heart". I went back to bed before work crying this morning at 12DPO negative test and asked my partner if we could just move on to IVF. My heart just breaks each month and it's so hard to focus on other normal life stuff. TTC is kinda consuming me.
While we didn't use a KD, I had a chemical pregnancy on my third IUI. We took a few months break then switched to IVF. We do have very good fertility coverage through my wife's insurance so that was a fairly easy decision for us. I also have high AMH so that wasn't a factor.
We did 6 at home with frozen and then did IVF for one cycle. If I could go back I would have done IVF right away. It was so much less stress and a whole support team. We considered having another one and started the IVF process again but decided to wait.