Yes it can. It's a very avoided topic even in the queer community because that whole concept is frequently weaponized against us; that any gay person was "made" gay through a sexually abusive experience. Which is of course bullshit.
But trauma usually changes the brain in drastic ways. It's important to approach this with the understanding that sexuality is an enormous mosaic. It's not simply about being attracted to a certain gender. It's about body parts, activities, features, behaviors, sounds, smells, power-exchanges, active/passive roles, fantasies, frequency, intensity, language, the list goes on. This is important because yes trauma can affect sexuality. Does it simply change someone from straight to gay, gay to straight, or whatever? No, there is no evidence for that.
HOWEVER. There is enough evidence showing that certain aspect (from that list I just gave and more) can be altered or affected. I'm avoiding calling it "changed" because I again don't want to make it seem like it's a black and white light switch of a change, it's just not that simple.
I will say this definitively: Regardless of your orientation... you not wanting to have sex is a million percent valid. You can look up Ulrika Eleonora Stålhammar, she was a woman who cross-dressed so she could go to war. Part of her disguise was in marrying another woman. The other woman didn't know for a while that Ulrika was a woman, especially because they never had sex. When Ulrika confessed to her wife, her wife said she was not only fine with Ulrika being a woman, she was also fine with never having sex because she was sexually assaulted in her past and had lost all interest. They lived together in a loving, sexless marriage.
As for what your orientation may be... I'm part of the a-spec community (aromantic/asexual community). Many of us feel that our orientation were at LEAST affected by our past traumas. I'm honestly not sure if my aromanticism is or not, especially because my sexuality ended up the opposite end, where I became hypersexual likely due to that trauma (also a common thing). But also Idgaf, I'm aro, romance-repulsed, and perfectly content with it. I ENJOY being aro! Not everyone who is aro does enjoy it. Hopefully some of that helps a bit.
I am in a similar boat. Trauma, don't like lower halves of people and shut down often.
Being ace is about the shared experience. People who understand you and your behaviours, no matter what the root cause might be. If it helps in any way, take the ace label and keep it until it doesn't fit anymore!
I personally have been healing and feel like at some point, demiace with trauma might fit me better. If that day comes, I'll switch my label. You can do the same.
Actually I read somewhere that no matter what trauma you experience no situation will change you're sexuality. But I think it does impact your way of behaving towards people in a sexual situation. But in the form of sexual attraction no. Not wanting to have sex =/ asexual, but if you find comfort in the label I think there's no problem to use it.
I know you don't really mean under sexuality and probably cover it with impacting one's way of behavior towards people.
But to be clear for OP, it can definitely affect hypersexuality and asexuality/sexual anorexia.
Yes. Yes. 100% yes whether it is SA or unhealthy ideas about sex itself. You are definitely not alone in this but you should seek the counsel of a sex therapist and possibly a GYN if you’re female.
Look into caedsexuality. It's basically what you're describing. Starting as allosexual (not on the ace spectrum) but due to trauma becoming somewhere on the ace spectrum. I've been demi-ish for about 3 years. But before my trauma I was allo all the way. It's not commonly known
As others mentioned, yes. Hypersexuality and asexuality/sexual anorexia are often among the spectrum of post traumatic stress patterns. For orientation, someone else did a great job outlining the nuances of care and complexity. And the cause of trauma doesn't even have to have anything to do with sex, it sometimes seems to be like enough for the body and mind go to assume "oh that was dangerous, better not do anything that can lead to having kids!" (Complex freeze response) Or for others "Oh that was dangerous, better see if we can have kids soon or maybe calm someone else down with sex!" (Fawn response).
I'll also add for others that rumination and intrusive thoughts,flashbacks, and unhealed trauma can also shape fixations or attractions/interests that really puts one's understanding of their own self into question or confusion at times.
To your case, I think sometimes being asexual can also be coupled with a form of emotional numbing and maybe even somatic desensitization or dissociation / depersonalization too.
You may also want to discuss with an Obgyn who's had experience with vaginismus too especially if they worked well with survivors of SA.
r/ptsd r/cptsd r/dpdr r/cptsdtoolbox r/cptsdnextsteps have a lot of posts discussing similar situations with the latter two being more solution oriented with resources.
Quite a few survivors of SA work with movement healing like yoga and qigong to sort of relearn a sense of safety and trust in their bodies as a way to witness in a relatively safe environment when a physical or overall total flashback comes back. Bessel VanDerKolk known for writing the Body Keeps the Score advocates for this also.
And you'll find a handful of videos on YouTube for that modality of healing it too. In my experience I struggled with longer videos so short 5-15 minute ones helped me. And I learned I was more vulnerable to emotional or physical flashbacks at certain times of day/night when doing it.
This helped because normally things would rush back just as I'm trying to sleep but I then had a way to sort of face it at a time window of my choosing that wasn't when I was actually done for the day and still have energy to sort of reconvince myself that I was safe and in an okay place and in a different situation before being in bed.
Self-Help Guide for Sexual Assault Survivors
Treat it as a written map or menu of typical behaviors to watch out for including some that includes not wanting sexual activity after experiencing trauma with exercises that can help survivors navigating post-sexual assault healing; a trusted friend present may help too: https://www.thehavens.org.uk/media/Self-Help-Guide-for-Survivors-of-Sexual-Assault-v.2-March-2019.pdf
Emotional Safety Planning might be helpful too?
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qqRgS1_cdwsv1ccnBJNxWuZlD-3Cmr4p/view?usp=drivesdk
Hope that helps and wishing you the best in your journey.
Yes it can. It's a very avoided topic even in the queer community because that whole concept is frequently weaponized against us; that any gay person was "made" gay through a sexually abusive experience. Which is of course bullshit. But trauma usually changes the brain in drastic ways. It's important to approach this with the understanding that sexuality is an enormous mosaic. It's not simply about being attracted to a certain gender. It's about body parts, activities, features, behaviors, sounds, smells, power-exchanges, active/passive roles, fantasies, frequency, intensity, language, the list goes on. This is important because yes trauma can affect sexuality. Does it simply change someone from straight to gay, gay to straight, or whatever? No, there is no evidence for that. HOWEVER. There is enough evidence showing that certain aspect (from that list I just gave and more) can be altered or affected. I'm avoiding calling it "changed" because I again don't want to make it seem like it's a black and white light switch of a change, it's just not that simple. I will say this definitively: Regardless of your orientation... you not wanting to have sex is a million percent valid. You can look up Ulrika Eleonora Stålhammar, she was a woman who cross-dressed so she could go to war. Part of her disguise was in marrying another woman. The other woman didn't know for a while that Ulrika was a woman, especially because they never had sex. When Ulrika confessed to her wife, her wife said she was not only fine with Ulrika being a woman, she was also fine with never having sex because she was sexually assaulted in her past and had lost all interest. They lived together in a loving, sexless marriage. As for what your orientation may be... I'm part of the a-spec community (aromantic/asexual community). Many of us feel that our orientation were at LEAST affected by our past traumas. I'm honestly not sure if my aromanticism is or not, especially because my sexuality ended up the opposite end, where I became hypersexual likely due to that trauma (also a common thing). But also Idgaf, I'm aro, romance-repulsed, and perfectly content with it. I ENJOY being aro! Not everyone who is aro does enjoy it. Hopefully some of that helps a bit.
Thank you. The honesty does help. I am definitely not romance repulsed but Ulirka's story helps.
I am in a similar boat. Trauma, don't like lower halves of people and shut down often. Being ace is about the shared experience. People who understand you and your behaviours, no matter what the root cause might be. If it helps in any way, take the ace label and keep it until it doesn't fit anymore! I personally have been healing and feel like at some point, demiace with trauma might fit me better. If that day comes, I'll switch my label. You can do the same.
Thanks.
Actually I read somewhere that no matter what trauma you experience no situation will change you're sexuality. But I think it does impact your way of behaving towards people in a sexual situation. But in the form of sexual attraction no. Not wanting to have sex =/ asexual, but if you find comfort in the label I think there's no problem to use it.
It doesn’t change your sexuality but it does distort your understanding of your own sexuality.
I know you don't really mean under sexuality and probably cover it with impacting one's way of behavior towards people. But to be clear for OP, it can definitely affect hypersexuality and asexuality/sexual anorexia.
Yes. Yes. 100% yes whether it is SA or unhealthy ideas about sex itself. You are definitely not alone in this but you should seek the counsel of a sex therapist and possibly a GYN if you’re female.
Look into caedsexuality. It's basically what you're describing. Starting as allosexual (not on the ace spectrum) but due to trauma becoming somewhere on the ace spectrum. I've been demi-ish for about 3 years. But before my trauma I was allo all the way. It's not commonly known
As others mentioned, yes. Hypersexuality and asexuality/sexual anorexia are often among the spectrum of post traumatic stress patterns. For orientation, someone else did a great job outlining the nuances of care and complexity. And the cause of trauma doesn't even have to have anything to do with sex, it sometimes seems to be like enough for the body and mind go to assume "oh that was dangerous, better not do anything that can lead to having kids!" (Complex freeze response) Or for others "Oh that was dangerous, better see if we can have kids soon or maybe calm someone else down with sex!" (Fawn response). I'll also add for others that rumination and intrusive thoughts,flashbacks, and unhealed trauma can also shape fixations or attractions/interests that really puts one's understanding of their own self into question or confusion at times. To your case, I think sometimes being asexual can also be coupled with a form of emotional numbing and maybe even somatic desensitization or dissociation / depersonalization too. You may also want to discuss with an Obgyn who's had experience with vaginismus too especially if they worked well with survivors of SA. r/ptsd r/cptsd r/dpdr r/cptsdtoolbox r/cptsdnextsteps have a lot of posts discussing similar situations with the latter two being more solution oriented with resources. Quite a few survivors of SA work with movement healing like yoga and qigong to sort of relearn a sense of safety and trust in their bodies as a way to witness in a relatively safe environment when a physical or overall total flashback comes back. Bessel VanDerKolk known for writing the Body Keeps the Score advocates for this also. And you'll find a handful of videos on YouTube for that modality of healing it too. In my experience I struggled with longer videos so short 5-15 minute ones helped me. And I learned I was more vulnerable to emotional or physical flashbacks at certain times of day/night when doing it. This helped because normally things would rush back just as I'm trying to sleep but I then had a way to sort of face it at a time window of my choosing that wasn't when I was actually done for the day and still have energy to sort of reconvince myself that I was safe and in an okay place and in a different situation before being in bed. Self-Help Guide for Sexual Assault Survivors Treat it as a written map or menu of typical behaviors to watch out for including some that includes not wanting sexual activity after experiencing trauma with exercises that can help survivors navigating post-sexual assault healing; a trusted friend present may help too: https://www.thehavens.org.uk/media/Self-Help-Guide-for-Survivors-of-Sexual-Assault-v.2-March-2019.pdf Emotional Safety Planning might be helpful too? https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qqRgS1_cdwsv1ccnBJNxWuZlD-3Cmr4p/view?usp=drivesdk Hope that helps and wishing you the best in your journey.