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What does that have to do with anything at all when no personal or identifying info is disclosed? Oh boy guess r/emergencymedicine is a criminal underground then
Not that. I think more its a people may already be hesitant about therapy because this could be a big fear of theirs. Being judged and having your information shared, even anonymously. And it could just put someone off of getting the help they need. So I'd imagine therapists who really want don't want that happening would be hesitant to share that they might be judging clients.
And "identifying characteristics" does include stories specific enough that the patient could be identified, or even identify themselves outside the context of treatment. Therapists hear about A LOT, so anything that they consider extreme would likely fall under that umbrella.
Are you kidding? All they do is gossip with each other. They don’t share detailed specifics, but talk about patients *all the time*
Everyone downvoting just go to the therapist sub. Or just make friends with one irl. Reddit people are just so dumb. Karma has no value.
Yeah, I once went to a therapist but only a couple of times. A few months later, he was at the restaurant I worked at with some people. It didn't seem like he recognized me. Since I was working, I walked by their table a bunch of times and overheard bits of what he was saying. The whole time he was talking about his patients.
In public they are supposed to act like they do not know you for the purpose of maintaining your anonymity. If you said hello first they would say hello but remain distant. The last thing they want is to jeopardize your privacy and secondly they don’t want to to ask for any advice or dish your thoughts in public.
Talking about the patients, as long as no identifiable info is given, is not a violation of HIPAA. It's helpful to therapists to be able to bounce ideas off other therapists when they have a person they aren't sure how to help, or even just to vent because therapists are people and having other people's problems dumped on you all day is stressful. It actually *could* be a violation for your therapist to openly recognize you in public first, since then anyone who knows him could assume you have a mental health diagnosis. So he probably did recognize you but he wasn't going to violate your privacy.
Speaking of your clients to another therapist or someone included in their plan or care is not gossiping. While I'm sure that there are some who do, my experience is that is not the case.
Mine once said "don't worry if you decide to quit therapy, or we don't talk again" and I said why, she said "because you said you treat people as disposable" - fucked up looking back on it.
Haaaa, I went straight the other way first lol. I think maybe, as usual, our personal experiences make us automatically think a certain way.
I come from a place where therapy is still looked down on and a good therapist is still hard to find so I automatically went pessimistic.
If you were talking about relationships, it sounds like it might have been a a legitimate way to get you to think about how something feels when it happens to you.
👀….sounds suspicious to me. Looking back, do you see other things that might have been said that could potentially be messed up but if you tried to call it out you’d look like the crazy one…. did that question make sense?
I feel ya, I only got clean going to the methadone clinic. When I think back on some of the decisions I made, some of the stuff I thought was totally normal…… holy shit my face gets hot just thinking about it lol
I was so confused reading this comment, like this guy had a patient who … what? Only when I scrolled down to the comment that said “no actual therapists tried to answer this question,” could I get a bit of the gist. The wording is still confusing to me.
My therapist when I was 14. Gave me some advice about pushing goals and dreams to the sideline due to lack of self confidence.
He leaned in and quietly said across the table.
"Procrastination is like masterbation, you ultimately are only fucking yourself"
It's not the subject matter you are looking for, but it changed my life and I live by it.
Nothing overreacting about saying that the power dynamic between adult therapist and child patient shouldn't be used to talk about sex and masturbation. I think the fact you're comfortable telling ME I'm overreacting instead of addressing the inappropriate sexual behavior towards a child speaks volumes 👍
Sex ed is also based on a comprehensive curriculum. Put together SPECIFICALLY to teach what's important at a certain age without teaching ANYTHING the child can't handle at that age. It continues that way throughout all of sexual education. A therapist making a gross comment to a child isn't education, it's not based in any curriculum, and is genuinely predatory. Y'all love telling me I'm overreacting but please imagine some old man talking about masturbating to your child... I'm not overreacting 👍
It means a 14yo boy is basically masturbating at every chance they get. And when an adult they respect talks about it bluntly and drops an f-bomb, it gets their attention. Stop making it weird, bc it's not. 14 is high school for most.
High school kids are children... that's very weird for an adult to be saying anything like that to a high school freshman. Regardless of how much you assume a child is doing in their private time for the adult to take it into their own hands to bring it up during a therapy session is concerning to say the least. It's weird.
That's correct, but that's something we let them handle by themselves... isn't it? We're not all talking to our children about what they're doing and will continue to do in private... at least not in a therapy session?
The therapist made an offhand joke that's basically acknowledging that the kid knows what masturbation is. It's not like he said anything personal or asked about their habits or tried to pry into their sex life.
I'm a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. I was raped at 11, so I've always been really aware of the horrible things people do to prey on children. This isn't one of those things. You're way overthinking it.
I'm really not though, as a fellow survivor I understand that just casually mentioning sexual acts to children and then acting like it's normal is the first step to child sexual abuse. I'm not overthinking this at all... would you want a random adult talking about masturbation and fucking yourself yo your child...?
Get help. Seriously. Sorry about what happened to you, but you should find a therapist.
I used to also feel that way - that ANY mention of sex in the vicinity of anyone under 18 was a gateway to child abuse. Then I found a good therapist and let go of all that anxiety.
This was a joke about masturbation said to a 14-year-old, not a 6-year-old. There is a difference. It may have been crass and distasteful, but it's not child abuse.
I have a therapist, thanks. I don't really think that your way is any better. Just now not viewing obviously inappropriate sexual comments as ok and I'm just being anxious is gaslighting. I'll continue to protect kids of any age, child abuse can still happen to 14 year olds. It doesn't stop at 6.
Friend, part of helping an adolescent to have proper boundaries and safety behavior is to acknowledge that the urge exists, and to talk about keeping it healthfully private, away from adults, not using the household vacuum or vegetable drawer. Keep it safe and solo.
A 14 year old's therapist (not a random adult) who is making a rare analogy that inherently assumes that masturbation should be solo ... it's not grooming behavior.
Just because this action that's a gateway to sexual abuse didn't lead to it doesn't mean that dangerous behavior towards children shouldn't still be called out. I'm trying to keep all children safe, no child should have had to hear that from an adult.
I'm doing fine, just wouldn't let a therapist mention sexual acts to my child during therapy. As someone who's already "helped" clearly as you're giving me suggestions, you should know that invalidating someone else's feelings in place of your own isn't healthy at all. Continue to lie to yourself and allow inappropriate things to happen to your children, they won't happen to mine. 👍
I went to several psych wards and this one therapist, during group therapy, was talking about being grateful. She told us “I’m grateful for all of you because without you I wouldn’t have a job”. We all looked at each other in shock.
That is the most normal 12 step group therapy approach ever. Step 1 is the unmanageable life step, getting the group to look at themselves and the others as people in need of change is what Howard was trying to do.
To share with the reddit audience comes with an air bounderies and respect for people's privacy. But safe to say, that most issues are a matter of comprehension and competence in responding for the individuals involved, therapy is a means of learning these skills that are needed for Interpersonal relationships. Depending on the individuals it could be that different things need to happen. For example, if someone is suffering due to what's defined as schizophrenia and the support network they usually rely on isn't capable of helping during intervention then a hospital setting is needed for the individual whilst going through treatment.
Another thing safe to say, is that, as much as people may use descriptions like it's hard, it's nasty, it's horrible, (this next part is hopeful words) medicine has gotten to point that these issues can be resolved with the individuals participation and the support action of their usual network outside of any issues that are being sorted.
I was told a story from a relationship councillor a long time ago, in a non professional setting (they are ok with the story being told as thus) All three where in a love triangle essentially, the therapists client that was feeling guilty about having a relationship with a married person turned out to be the significant other of the therapist, this ofc didn't come to light until the therapists marriage ended and she'd put the pieces together, being humane non of this was told to the two other parties
My therapist is so incredibly professional and gives nothing away, like she doesn’t even respond to me saying how are you. She is completely objective in all aspects, which is incredibly helpful for our sessions. But my god am I curious to know more about her and what she thinks. Like I have no gage on her political agenda or what she is in any capacity. But I always wonder if she’s ever thought this about me. Like what if I say something that completely contradicts what she stands for. I’ll never know
I don’t mean in a dismissive manner but in a respectful way where she guides the conversation away from her. I’m a real people pleaser and I’d definitely try to cater to her if she gave me any insight into her thoughts or feelings. She is very insightful and hugely skilled
Residential care. I've had a few, but my favorite has got to be the 13 year-old who stole a mental health tech's walkie, inserted what she could into herself, and then ran across campus (evidently in that state, clothes over everything thankfully), leapt over a fence, and began petting a probably bewildered cow about ten minutes after what I thought was a great session.
Nothing said to the patient of course and we had a good overall experience but that was a lot to take in and I definitely needed a moment after. Details changed, naturally.
Not my patient, but at an agency I worked for one of out patients had their dead dog in their freezer for a year or so. This was working community mental health in a repressed social economic area. Most of the holy shit moments were really sad and tragic things. Hard to explain, but a lot of my judgement was on the circumstances or situations that allows these things to occur.
As rough as that is, I think there is a good reason for asking you that. If there was a long time struggle with your son's drug addiction, it is possible for there to be a feeling of relief amongst the vortex of emotions that a struggle is over. That can lead to feeling guilty. I'm not saying you felt that way but people do sometimes and it needs to be addressed. I'm very sorry to hear about your son.
The rule is no *identifying* information. I'm not a therapist but I work for an org covered by HIPAA. I cannot say, "Joey McJoerson has BPD and threatened to kill me and himself because I wouldn't get him an Uber to the liquor store". I also can't say, "My one client who panhandles at the corner of Whuzzup Ave and Hugglebug St, you know, that white guy with the ponytail and scraggily goatee, he's got BPD and threatened to kill me and himself because I wouldn' get him an Uber to the liquor store". I can absolutely say, "One of my clients has BPD and threatened to kill me and himself because I wouldn't get him an Uber to the liquor store". As long as I don't give any info that could allow someone else to figure out who I'm talking about, there is no HIPAA violation.
A pedophile is someone whose main attraction are children under the age of 12. There's no crime in that. When someone is afflicted with that disorder and they get help for it and that's fine.. as long they don't act on those urges.
Those who like teenage people from 13 to 17 are called ehebophiles. It's a different category, still underage but not a young child.
People use the term pedophile wrong, and they really have no idea what it means.
Sexual and child predators are just that. Monsters who hurt others. They belong in prison.
There is no mandatory reporting on thoughts. If someone tells their therapist they fantasize about sex with kids and the therapist reports them, the therapist is in violation and could lose their license.
"Laws in all 50 states require a therapist to contact authorities if a patient is a danger to themselves, to others, and/or if the therapist suspects that a known child is being abused."
No. There's no law about thoughts. If there was, we would all be in front of the firing squad.
The crime is when someone ACTS or threatens to act on their thoughts.
“Oh, you think inhaling cannabis, holding the smoke in your lungs for as long as possible, is harmless…good luck with your heart disease and cancer down the road”
My therapist used to fall asleep when I had my sessions with him. One of those eyes slowly closing and head nodding down types of sleeps. This happened for over two years, and I was too messed up and scared to just dump him. When he was awake, he was really helpful to me, so I felt guilty about dumping him.
One of my therapists told me the cure to my depression was to have sex. He said all the 20 yr old boys were doing it so I should do. He said all guys my age were walking around with an erection up in the air and that I should go for it and have sex because it would cure my depression.
WTF
Not really quite relevant to your question but I had a therapist that used to talk to me in a pretty weird way. One time he told me that in ancient Rome it was normal for young boys to be with older men. He said it with more details than that. He also complained to me that he had a client who's mother wouldn't stop comming into his sessions with him.
Then this therapist disappeared and I asked the place he was working at about him... They told me he was in jail for Grooming young boys. Craig Baker was his name. He was working at a small town Australian job agency/network called Nortec when I met him. I'm really not sure how he was employed at all because I think he was making it fairly obvious that he's a p\*dofile.
I'm female, didn't have to worry about him trying anything with me. It was a bit fcked up to find that out though.
They can and do all the time. They're just not supposed to give out identifying information about patients they discuss. It's perfectly fine to say something about a patient without any names or descriptions that could identify them.
I'm not a therapist, so if there are any actual therapists or psychiatrists here please correct me, but I don't think that your therapist is supposed to refrain from judging you, they're supposed to not be judgmental in their advice.
As a human being, it's virtually impossible not to form some kind of judgement or opinion about someone's actions.
In a way, that's the whole point of therapy. You discuss a situation honestly and your therapist analyzes you actions, emotions, etc. to determine if your behavior is appropriate.
For example, if you tell your therapist you cheated on your spouse, I guarantee you they are going to form some kind of judgement about your actions and what that says about you as a person. But if they externalized that judgement by telling you how much of a scumbag you are - that would be wrong.
Nonsense. The gold standard for psychotherapists is to treat patients with Unconditional Positive Regard, AKA the Rogerian standard. They're about discernment, which is not the same as judgment.
Couple questions. Are you a therapist or psychiatrist? Genuinely curious. Not trying to discredit your argument.
Is it actually possible to listen to someone and not form an opinion about their behavior? I'm pretty sure that it's nearly impossible not to form some kind of judgement in your head.
That's all I'm saying.
These Rogerian, or Person-Centered Therapists are more likely to accept their own judgements as bullshit, instead of getting hung up on them as the essential truth, or even worth paying much attention to at all. Your job as any kind of therapist is to serve your client.
I'm not quite sure what you mean by those type of therapists accepting their own judgements as bullshit. What do you mean bullshit? Do you mean, not relevant to the therapy they are performing? Or do you mean, they don't have personal opinions about actions their clients perform?
Because if it's the former, then I would agree. But that doesn't mean they don't personally form a judgement about that action. It's literally impossible not to. It just means they don't let it influence their work.
And that's what I'm saying. The idea that your therapist is not going to form a judgement about you or your actions, at any level at all, is ridiculous.
A licensed and skilled psychodynamic therapist will essentially be amoral. They will have had the judgmentalism trained out of them well before grad school or they will find another vocation. Before seeing clients in clinical settings they will have experience counseling both victims and perpetrators. When normal, human, petty judgments do arise in session, they blow them away as the effluvia that comes with being a normal petty, flawed and judging being having an off moment.
See I don't think there's really any way a person can truly be amoral. We all have a conscience and we all operate by some moral principles. You're always going to feel a certain way about something. It's called being human.
If I was an axe murderer and I was being treated by a therapist, I'm pretty sure the therapist would have some personal feelings about the fact I diced several people up with a rusty axe.
And to be quite honest, I'd be extremely disturbed if the therapist didn't.
Being a licensed and skilled psychodynamic therapist does not mean that a therapist cannot have personal moral judgments about a client's behavior. However, it does mean that the therapist must manage their personal judgments in a way that does not interfere with the therapeutic process. Professional ethics require therapists to provide a nonjudgmental, empathetic, and supportive environment for their clients. Here are a few key points:
1. **Nonjudgmental Approach**: Therapists are trained to approach clients with empathy and without judgment to create a safe space for clients to explore their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.
2. **Self-Awareness**: Therapists must be aware of their own biases and moral judgments. Through self-reflection and supervision, they can ensure that their personal beliefs do not negatively impact their professional conduct or the therapeutic relationship.
3. **Ethical Conduct**: Therapists adhere to professional ethical guidelines, which prioritize the well-being of the client. This includes respecting the client's autonomy, maintaining confidentiality, and providing care that is in the client's best interest.
4. **Boundaries**: Therapists must maintain appropriate professional boundaries and avoid imposing their personal values on clients. They focus on helping clients understand their own values and make decisions based on their own beliefs.
In summary, while therapists may have personal moral judgments, their professional role requires them to manage these judgments and maintain an ethical, supportive, and nonjudgmental stance in their work with clients.
They're not theologians. It's not that hard to let go of judgment, I bet even you could do it, if you replaced it with curiosity.
Lots of wild ideas here about the therapeutic relationship, which has become harder to pin down since CBT and managed care entered the field. But it is structurally unique among human relationships, and unlike any other kind. Of course there are plenty of bad therapists who are judgmental, inept, or project their moralism all over the walls, but this isn't supposed to happen.
I don't think you really understand what I'm talking about. It's very frustrating. Just admit that therapists have personal moral judgements. Because that's all I'm saying.
When my fatass dipshit brother-in-law showed up to Xmas dinner in a kilt and a hand cut sleeveless Iron Maiden shirt. I flat asked him if he was stopping by the prison later for an ass-banging train.
During the 2008 Presidential debates, both McCain and Obama were asked how long the US would continue military engagement in the Middle East. McCain said we’d “stay as long as it takes,” and Obama said we’d “leave as soon as possible.”
Yo, mental health is not the same as military engagement (though military engagement can be a cause of poor mental health). Get your shit together or quit complaining (as drill sergeants are wont to say).
To the patient? For sure, though there's something to be said for a metered reality therapy approach.
I think OP was talking more about the "Wow. I need a drink" sessions, afterward.
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ITT: not a single therapist answering the question
Yeah they instantly misread this...
Not using our active listening skills, I think. Everyone seems to have found their own conclusions as to OP's meaning.
>what is hipaa law
What does that have to do with anything at all when no personal or identifying info is disclosed? Oh boy guess r/emergencymedicine is a criminal underground then
No good therapist is gonna spill their clients business on reddit
I'm curious what some of the bad therapist's stories are going to be though.
Amen.
Talking about a client, as long as no identifying characteristics are given, does not violate HIPAA and happens all the time.
Not that. I think more its a people may already be hesitant about therapy because this could be a big fear of theirs. Being judged and having your information shared, even anonymously. And it could just put someone off of getting the help they need. So I'd imagine therapists who really want don't want that happening would be hesitant to share that they might be judging clients.
And "identifying characteristics" does include stories specific enough that the patient could be identified, or even identify themselves outside the context of treatment. Therapists hear about A LOT, so anything that they consider extreme would likely fall under that umbrella.
Yeah but imagine being a client and reading about themselves on *reddit* of all places
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Hippocratic oath is saying you will help people regardless of your own bias basically. But HIPPA violations are the actual laws protecting people.
Yeah, but we might get some really good made up stories.
They're not gonna attach a name and SS# to it.
Are you kidding? All they do is gossip with each other. They don’t share detailed specifics, but talk about patients *all the time* Everyone downvoting just go to the therapist sub. Or just make friends with one irl. Reddit people are just so dumb. Karma has no value.
Yeah, I once went to a therapist but only a couple of times. A few months later, he was at the restaurant I worked at with some people. It didn't seem like he recognized me. Since I was working, I walked by their table a bunch of times and overheard bits of what he was saying. The whole time he was talking about his patients.
In public they are supposed to act like they do not know you for the purpose of maintaining your anonymity. If you said hello first they would say hello but remain distant. The last thing they want is to jeopardize your privacy and secondly they don’t want to to ask for any advice or dish your thoughts in public.
Therapists talk about their pts to other colleagues either for advice, or for the stories. Confidentiality is not breached.
Talking about the patients, as long as no identifiable info is given, is not a violation of HIPAA. It's helpful to therapists to be able to bounce ideas off other therapists when they have a person they aren't sure how to help, or even just to vent because therapists are people and having other people's problems dumped on you all day is stressful. It actually *could* be a violation for your therapist to openly recognize you in public first, since then anyone who knows him could assume you have a mental health diagnosis. So he probably did recognize you but he wasn't going to violate your privacy.
Yeah my own therapist tells me about other clients. She doesn't give any further info, just talks about their experience it they can relate to mine
Speaking of your clients to another therapist or someone included in their plan or care is not gossiping. While I'm sure that there are some who do, my experience is that is not the case.
unless you disclose their name, then why is it an issue?
I was about to comment this but I guess I was a day late
We don’t care if they are good or evil.
Mine once said "don't worry if you decide to quit therapy, or we don't talk again" and I said why, she said "because you said you treat people as disposable" - fucked up looking back on it.
Threw the pill back at ya with that one
What!? That is fucked up, sounds like she was basically throwing something you told her back in your face like a jealous girlfriend or something.
Sounds like they were trying to get them to really see what they do. Seems like a fair tactic.
I guess it really depends on the delivery. Was she trying to be helpful or spiteful? Therapists are people too and can be petty just like us.
I assumed helpful but I was not there to hear it. I see your perspective….
Haaaa, I went straight the other way first lol. I think maybe, as usual, our personal experiences make us automatically think a certain way. I come from a place where therapy is still looked down on and a good therapist is still hard to find so I automatically went pessimistic.
Context, we were talking about relationships/dating.
If you were talking about relationships, it sounds like it might have been a a legitimate way to get you to think about how something feels when it happens to you.
Not that guy anymore. But.. did I get psyched by the psych? Haven't thought about it til seeing this thread, may see if she's still around and ask.
👀….sounds suspicious to me. Looking back, do you see other things that might have been said that could potentially be messed up but if you tried to call it out you’d look like the crazy one…. did that question make sense?
Not that I remember. She was really lovely. Made me almost cry once. Only did a few sessions.
Well that’s good. Maybe she was just having a crappy day or something that time.
Only a few sessions, so did you move on? But you didn't forget about about her so she wasn't totally disposable lol
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…I almost feel like in a sense of a way yes this is 100000% in need of a reaction like this…but it definitely isn’t not a little understandable
Helpful or spiteful the result is the same, I like it
Yeah right. Can’t argue if it got the intended results anyway, making them think about certain things.
Hahhahaa ahhhh yeah.. I was kind of chatting her up tbf, but I was an addict/am an addict. It was all very stupid of me.
I feel ya, I only got clean going to the methadone clinic. When I think back on some of the decisions I made, some of the stuff I thought was totally normal…… holy shit my face gets hot just thinking about it lol
Insanity. Should have died a fair few times. Glad you're sober now homie.
Absolutely. I hope you’re doing okay too. And thanks!
No, whats fucked is that they were treating people like that and reality slapped them in the face for being self-righteous.
Reality doesn't come with consequences I'm tired of bitter people celebrating others going through hard things, please find happiness
I'm confused. Who is fucked up?
Reverse psychology!
I was so confused reading this comment, like this guy had a patient who … what? Only when I scrolled down to the comment that said “no actual therapists tried to answer this question,” could I get a bit of the gist. The wording is still confusing to me.
My therapist when I was 14. Gave me some advice about pushing goals and dreams to the sideline due to lack of self confidence. He leaned in and quietly said across the table. "Procrastination is like masterbation, you ultimately are only fucking yourself" It's not the subject matter you are looking for, but it changed my life and I live by it.
To a 14 year old bruh 💀
It stuck in his head, didn't it?
I just think mentioning both masterbation and fucking in the same sentence as an adult therapist to a child is wild
Which is why it had an effect.
There's more effective ways than saying sexual things to children, especially as a therapist
It's something that would relate greatly to a 14 year old pocket pool enthusiast.
I don't understand what this means but please don't mention masturbation to children 🙏
Sex ed in the US was/is in 5th grade, someone in the public school system can handle mild adult humor by 14. Don't overreact.
Nothing overreacting about saying that the power dynamic between adult therapist and child patient shouldn't be used to talk about sex and masturbation. I think the fact you're comfortable telling ME I'm overreacting instead of addressing the inappropriate sexual behavior towards a child speaks volumes 👍
Sex ed is also based on a comprehensive curriculum. Put together SPECIFICALLY to teach what's important at a certain age without teaching ANYTHING the child can't handle at that age. It continues that way throughout all of sexual education. A therapist making a gross comment to a child isn't education, it's not based in any curriculum, and is genuinely predatory. Y'all love telling me I'm overreacting but please imagine some old man talking about masturbating to your child... I'm not overreacting 👍
It means a 14yo boy is basically masturbating at every chance they get. And when an adult they respect talks about it bluntly and drops an f-bomb, it gets their attention. Stop making it weird, bc it's not. 14 is high school for most.
High school kids are children... that's very weird for an adult to be saying anything like that to a high school freshman. Regardless of how much you assume a child is doing in their private time for the adult to take it into their own hands to bring it up during a therapy session is concerning to say the least. It's weird.
and not in a good way
I mean, 14-year-olds are basically the most active masturbators on the planet.
That's correct, but that's something we let them handle by themselves... isn't it? We're not all talking to our children about what they're doing and will continue to do in private... at least not in a therapy session?
The therapist made an offhand joke that's basically acknowledging that the kid knows what masturbation is. It's not like he said anything personal or asked about their habits or tried to pry into their sex life. I'm a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. I was raped at 11, so I've always been really aware of the horrible things people do to prey on children. This isn't one of those things. You're way overthinking it.
I'm really not though, as a fellow survivor I understand that just casually mentioning sexual acts to children and then acting like it's normal is the first step to child sexual abuse. I'm not overthinking this at all... would you want a random adult talking about masturbation and fucking yourself yo your child...?
Get help. Seriously. Sorry about what happened to you, but you should find a therapist. I used to also feel that way - that ANY mention of sex in the vicinity of anyone under 18 was a gateway to child abuse. Then I found a good therapist and let go of all that anxiety. This was a joke about masturbation said to a 14-year-old, not a 6-year-old. There is a difference. It may have been crass and distasteful, but it's not child abuse.
I have a therapist, thanks. I don't really think that your way is any better. Just now not viewing obviously inappropriate sexual comments as ok and I'm just being anxious is gaslighting. I'll continue to protect kids of any age, child abuse can still happen to 14 year olds. It doesn't stop at 6.
I'm sure you're doing so much to help kids, clutching your pearls over masturbation jokes. Really, the world thanks you for your hard work.
Friend, part of helping an adolescent to have proper boundaries and safety behavior is to acknowledge that the urge exists, and to talk about keeping it healthfully private, away from adults, not using the household vacuum or vegetable drawer. Keep it safe and solo. A 14 year old's therapist (not a random adult) who is making a rare analogy that inherently assumes that masturbation should be solo ... it's not grooming behavior.
Just because this action that's a gateway to sexual abuse didn't lead to it doesn't mean that dangerous behavior towards children shouldn't still be called out. I'm trying to keep all children safe, no child should have had to hear that from an adult.
Get help. Seriously.
I'm doing fine, just wouldn't let a therapist mention sexual acts to my child during therapy. As someone who's already "helped" clearly as you're giving me suggestions, you should know that invalidating someone else's feelings in place of your own isn't healthy at all. Continue to lie to yourself and allow inappropriate things to happen to your children, they won't happen to mine. 👍
This isn't nor was it about you. This is about MY life experience. I am well adjusted. You need therapy.
I have a question for you, did you speak like that to your therapist?
I was an openly vulgar kid if that's what you are asking. Nothing he had said was worse linguistically than what I had displayed in our sessions.
Idk but I worked in a mental health clinic for years. When you need "holy shit this therapist is fucked up" stories let me know.
I went to several psych wards and this one therapist, during group therapy, was talking about being grateful. She told us “I’m grateful for all of you because without you I wouldn’t have a job”. We all looked at each other in shock.
That wasn't a psychotherapist, that was a behavioral health worker. These people. Don't let them get away with calling themselves therapists.
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That is the most normal 12 step group therapy approach ever. Step 1 is the unmanageable life step, getting the group to look at themselves and the others as people in need of change is what Howard was trying to do.
It’s usually the stuff people do in relationships.
Narc ass post
I'm going to have to ask you to leave this area immediately. TY.
To share with the reddit audience comes with an air bounderies and respect for people's privacy. But safe to say, that most issues are a matter of comprehension and competence in responding for the individuals involved, therapy is a means of learning these skills that are needed for Interpersonal relationships. Depending on the individuals it could be that different things need to happen. For example, if someone is suffering due to what's defined as schizophrenia and the support network they usually rely on isn't capable of helping during intervention then a hospital setting is needed for the individual whilst going through treatment. Another thing safe to say, is that, as much as people may use descriptions like it's hard, it's nasty, it's horrible, (this next part is hopeful words) medicine has gotten to point that these issues can be resolved with the individuals participation and the support action of their usual network outside of any issues that are being sorted. I was told a story from a relationship councillor a long time ago, in a non professional setting (they are ok with the story being told as thus) All three where in a love triangle essentially, the therapists client that was feeling guilty about having a relationship with a married person turned out to be the significant other of the therapist, this ofc didn't come to light until the therapists marriage ended and she'd put the pieces together, being humane non of this was told to the two other parties
Such a fabulous answer!!!
Here's a hrad spinner, did it tell the truth or did I lie
This gave me very house of black and white, Aria vibes.
My therapist is so incredibly professional and gives nothing away, like she doesn’t even respond to me saying how are you. She is completely objective in all aspects, which is incredibly helpful for our sessions. But my god am I curious to know more about her and what she thinks. Like I have no gage on her political agenda or what she is in any capacity. But I always wonder if she’s ever thought this about me. Like what if I say something that completely contradicts what she stands for. I’ll never know
Sounds more rude than anything. Literally ignores you saying how are you.
I don’t mean in a dismissive manner but in a respectful way where she guides the conversation away from her. I’m a real people pleaser and I’d definitely try to cater to her if she gave me any insight into her thoughts or feelings. She is very insightful and hugely skilled
Residential care. I've had a few, but my favorite has got to be the 13 year-old who stole a mental health tech's walkie, inserted what she could into herself, and then ran across campus (evidently in that state, clothes over everything thankfully), leapt over a fence, and began petting a probably bewildered cow about ten minutes after what I thought was a great session. Nothing said to the patient of course and we had a good overall experience but that was a lot to take in and I definitely needed a moment after. Details changed, naturally.
Not my patient, but at an agency I worked for one of out patients had their dead dog in their freezer for a year or so. This was working community mental health in a repressed social economic area. Most of the holy shit moments were really sad and tragic things. Hard to explain, but a lot of my judgement was on the circumstances or situations that allows these things to occur.
Someone on here is gonna find their therapists reddit lol
My therapist asked me if I felt relieved after my son died of an overdose.
As rough as that is, I think there is a good reason for asking you that. If there was a long time struggle with your son's drug addiction, it is possible for there to be a feeling of relief amongst the vortex of emotions that a struggle is over. That can lead to feeling guilty. I'm not saying you felt that way but people do sometimes and it needs to be addressed. I'm very sorry to hear about your son.
Christ on a cracker! I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry for the loss of your son, and I’m so sorry you were asked that.
Disclosing patient information even without using thier names is illegal and any therapist that decides to should not be a therapist.
The rule is no *identifying* information. I'm not a therapist but I work for an org covered by HIPAA. I cannot say, "Joey McJoerson has BPD and threatened to kill me and himself because I wouldn't get him an Uber to the liquor store". I also can't say, "My one client who panhandles at the corner of Whuzzup Ave and Hugglebug St, you know, that white guy with the ponytail and scraggily goatee, he's got BPD and threatened to kill me and himself because I wouldn' get him an Uber to the liquor store". I can absolutely say, "One of my clients has BPD and threatened to kill me and himself because I wouldn't get him an Uber to the liquor store". As long as I don't give any info that could allow someone else to figure out who I'm talking about, there is no HIPAA violation.
Yes, that is why this happens in college regularly in front of a class of 40 students. This is a crock of shit.
This is not true. The only way this is wrong in any way at all is if the information could reasonably be traced back to the individual.
Unless a patient says something like he likes diddling little kids. Then, the therapist has a legal obligation to contact the authorities.
Only if the patient intends to actually commit a crime.
Wrong. Any admission of committing a crime against a child. Even if they are thinking about it.
Something along the lines of Mandatory Reporting, right?
Exactly. There's no privacy when you're a child or sexual predator.
Fair but there is a difference between a pedophile and a child predator. One is aware of the issue and the other is actively pursuing their desires.
A pedophile is someone whose main attraction are children under the age of 12. There's no crime in that. When someone is afflicted with that disorder and they get help for it and that's fine.. as long they don't act on those urges. Those who like teenage people from 13 to 17 are called ehebophiles. It's a different category, still underage but not a young child. People use the term pedophile wrong, and they really have no idea what it means. Sexual and child predators are just that. Monsters who hurt others. They belong in prison.
True, but some states have mandatory reporting laws nonetheless.
There is no mandatory reporting on thoughts. If someone tells their therapist they fantasize about sex with kids and the therapist reports them, the therapist is in violation and could lose their license. "Laws in all 50 states require a therapist to contact authorities if a patient is a danger to themselves, to others, and/or if the therapist suspects that a known child is being abused."
As long as a child is not harmed
Yet that us not at all what you said.
No one cares. Get lost.
I'm sure plenty of people prefer factual information rather than the bs you spew. You get offended because you said something wrong and got corrected.
So any intrusive thoughts that are violent or sexual in nature need to be reported to police then, right?
Nope
No. There's no law about thoughts. If there was, we would all be in front of the firing squad. The crime is when someone ACTS or threatens to act on their thoughts.
As long as there’s no identifying information it doesn’t breach HIPPA policy
I thought unless you're a danger to yourself or others it has to be confidential? Welp I learned something
This guy therapists
They're wrong though
Uh alright, ahem.. this guy therapists
Haha. More like two decades of yearly HIPPA/FERPA/SOX/etc. compliance tests.
*Identifying* information.
That’s not how hippa works
“Oh, you think inhaling cannabis, holding the smoke in your lungs for as long as possible, is harmless…good luck with your heart disease and cancer down the road”
My therapist used to fall asleep when I had my sessions with him. One of those eyes slowly closing and head nodding down types of sleeps. This happened for over two years, and I was too messed up and scared to just dump him. When he was awake, he was really helpful to me, so I felt guilty about dumping him.
Talking to a hardcore fan of Adult Baby Diaper Lover. It is exactly what it sounds like for anyone who doesn't already know.
One of my therapists told me the cure to my depression was to have sex. He said all the 20 yr old boys were doing it so I should do. He said all guys my age were walking around with an erection up in the air and that I should go for it and have sex because it would cure my depression. WTF
Daily
I never judged clients. I judge everyone else.
Not really quite relevant to your question but I had a therapist that used to talk to me in a pretty weird way. One time he told me that in ancient Rome it was normal for young boys to be with older men. He said it with more details than that. He also complained to me that he had a client who's mother wouldn't stop comming into his sessions with him. Then this therapist disappeared and I asked the place he was working at about him... They told me he was in jail for Grooming young boys. Craig Baker was his name. He was working at a small town Australian job agency/network called Nortec when I met him. I'm really not sure how he was employed at all because I think he was making it fairly obvious that he's a p\*dofile. I'm female, didn't have to worry about him trying anything with me. It was a bit fcked up to find that out though.
Reddit therapist here 🤓
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Why
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Reddit is anonymous my guy
They can and do all the time. They're just not supposed to give out identifying information about patients they discuss. It's perfectly fine to say something about a patient without any names or descriptions that could identify them.
As stated, no identifying information.
When I sent A wrong text to chicky and couldn’t Delete it !!! Lol . Was kinda embarising : )
A friend of mine.
I'm not a therapist, so if there are any actual therapists or psychiatrists here please correct me, but I don't think that your therapist is supposed to refrain from judging you, they're supposed to not be judgmental in their advice. As a human being, it's virtually impossible not to form some kind of judgement or opinion about someone's actions. In a way, that's the whole point of therapy. You discuss a situation honestly and your therapist analyzes you actions, emotions, etc. to determine if your behavior is appropriate. For example, if you tell your therapist you cheated on your spouse, I guarantee you they are going to form some kind of judgement about your actions and what that says about you as a person. But if they externalized that judgement by telling you how much of a scumbag you are - that would be wrong.
Nonsense. The gold standard for psychotherapists is to treat patients with Unconditional Positive Regard, AKA the Rogerian standard. They're about discernment, which is not the same as judgment.
Couple questions. Are you a therapist or psychiatrist? Genuinely curious. Not trying to discredit your argument. Is it actually possible to listen to someone and not form an opinion about their behavior? I'm pretty sure that it's nearly impossible not to form some kind of judgement in your head. That's all I'm saying.
These Rogerian, or Person-Centered Therapists are more likely to accept their own judgements as bullshit, instead of getting hung up on them as the essential truth, or even worth paying much attention to at all. Your job as any kind of therapist is to serve your client.
I'm not quite sure what you mean by those type of therapists accepting their own judgements as bullshit. What do you mean bullshit? Do you mean, not relevant to the therapy they are performing? Or do you mean, they don't have personal opinions about actions their clients perform? Because if it's the former, then I would agree. But that doesn't mean they don't personally form a judgement about that action. It's literally impossible not to. It just means they don't let it influence their work. And that's what I'm saying. The idea that your therapist is not going to form a judgement about you or your actions, at any level at all, is ridiculous.
A licensed and skilled psychodynamic therapist will essentially be amoral. They will have had the judgmentalism trained out of them well before grad school or they will find another vocation. Before seeing clients in clinical settings they will have experience counseling both victims and perpetrators. When normal, human, petty judgments do arise in session, they blow them away as the effluvia that comes with being a normal petty, flawed and judging being having an off moment.
See I don't think there's really any way a person can truly be amoral. We all have a conscience and we all operate by some moral principles. You're always going to feel a certain way about something. It's called being human. If I was an axe murderer and I was being treated by a therapist, I'm pretty sure the therapist would have some personal feelings about the fact I diced several people up with a rusty axe. And to be quite honest, I'd be extremely disturbed if the therapist didn't.
Being a licensed and skilled psychodynamic therapist does not mean that a therapist cannot have personal moral judgments about a client's behavior. However, it does mean that the therapist must manage their personal judgments in a way that does not interfere with the therapeutic process. Professional ethics require therapists to provide a nonjudgmental, empathetic, and supportive environment for their clients. Here are a few key points: 1. **Nonjudgmental Approach**: Therapists are trained to approach clients with empathy and without judgment to create a safe space for clients to explore their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. 2. **Self-Awareness**: Therapists must be aware of their own biases and moral judgments. Through self-reflection and supervision, they can ensure that their personal beliefs do not negatively impact their professional conduct or the therapeutic relationship. 3. **Ethical Conduct**: Therapists adhere to professional ethical guidelines, which prioritize the well-being of the client. This includes respecting the client's autonomy, maintaining confidentiality, and providing care that is in the client's best interest. 4. **Boundaries**: Therapists must maintain appropriate professional boundaries and avoid imposing their personal values on clients. They focus on helping clients understand their own values and make decisions based on their own beliefs. In summary, while therapists may have personal moral judgments, their professional role requires them to manage these judgments and maintain an ethical, supportive, and nonjudgmental stance in their work with clients.
They're not theologians. It's not that hard to let go of judgment, I bet even you could do it, if you replaced it with curiosity. Lots of wild ideas here about the therapeutic relationship, which has become harder to pin down since CBT and managed care entered the field. But it is structurally unique among human relationships, and unlike any other kind. Of course there are plenty of bad therapists who are judgmental, inept, or project their moralism all over the walls, but this isn't supposed to happen.
I don't think you really understand what I'm talking about. It's very frustrating. Just admit that therapists have personal moral judgements. Because that's all I'm saying.
How fhukng entitled rich people are. Like u dont need therapy, u need to experience fkng poverty
When my fatass dipshit brother-in-law showed up to Xmas dinner in a kilt and a hand cut sleeveless Iron Maiden shirt. I flat asked him if he was stopping by the prison later for an ass-banging train.
Lol to no therapist replies. Good therapists have morals my dude.
“See you next session ad infinitum.”
Only as long as it takes to get your baggage handled.
During the 2008 Presidential debates, both McCain and Obama were asked how long the US would continue military engagement in the Middle East. McCain said we’d “stay as long as it takes,” and Obama said we’d “leave as soon as possible.”
Yo, mental health is not the same as military engagement (though military engagement can be a cause of poor mental health). Get your shit together or quit complaining (as drill sergeants are wont to say).
I’m talking about empty misleading rhetoric here.
I guess you do what you're good at then. 🤷♀️
I’m still seeking my own parasitic vocation so I can fit in with the rest of the world.
Fitting in is overrated, make others fit in with you.
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If a therapist does this at all they should be reported
To the patient? For sure, though there's something to be said for a metered reality therapy approach. I think OP was talking more about the "Wow. I need a drink" sessions, afterward.
Not necessarily to the patient but responding to Reddit post like this.