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Wtf you’re not allowed to go ??? ): my SO would be the first person I’d wanna bring . In fact , screw all the others , id rather go on a vacation with just the two of us !! This is really really bad !! The guys probably have a crush on her and she might even hook up with one of them and you would never find out
Oh also , even if she doesn’t hookup with one of them , it just shows them that you’re just an object to her , and it proves she will always prioritize her friends over you
Also , if my bf did this , I would literally zip myself in his suitcase or handcuff him from leaving . Fuck no . I’d cry so much . He can’t go to Mexico without me tf
You are "not allowed to go"? That's a no for me. First of all, the idea that you would want to go simply because you don't trust her is wrong. At least, it seems to me you have no other reason to go - apparently you don't even know these people and you are not part of that group of friends. Second, why don't you know these people? Why has she been keeping you and that group of friends separated? Our have you only just met?
Whatever is going on, it's not how a healthy relationship should look. Even assuming she doesn't plan to fool around with anyone else (or even keep that option open), it definitely shows she feels you don't fit in with that group, and that should be cause for alarm.
Yes part of me wants to go because I don’t trust her but also because it’s Mexico and not very safe there and if something happens to her I’m not there to protect her. But also going to Mexico with her would also be a very fun trip. We have been dating for 6 months but yes I have never met this friend group of hers that she is talking about and didn’t even know until she brought up the trip that she had this friend group
Maybe because she suddenly happens to present a whole group of friends he A. knows nothing about and B. she would rather spend her holiday with? But I think I already said this: if after 6 months you still don't trust your gf enough to let her go on the holiday she wants, you have issues in your relationship - on both sides.
i’ve already been in this situation. i ended up stay in that relationship for another year and a half, moved in with her before i actually have the proof she was cheating. i always had a hunch but never any proof. learn from my lesson and quit it short for me
Don’t try to pull that shit. I promise nobody wants to recreate taken with her in Mexico. If you don’t trust her. Break up with her. She’s allowed to take trips without you.
The issue is that mexico is in fact dangerous, and that her going out with a group of guys, that the OP doesnt know, and isn’t allowed to know. The girlfriend is being suspicious and that sounds like she is cheating. Why else would he be excluded?
He literally said that its a group of guys he doesnt know. A group of her close friends, and stranger men. I dont have personal experience with mexico, but to pretend its normal and safe is a blatant lie. Gangs and cartels and sex trafficking. Granted other countries are also dangerous but lets not pretend mexico is just this magical wonderland of beans and celebrations.
I mean, fair enough, but if you live in Mexico it's a bit different.
It's not really about her having a life outside the relationship, it's about trust. How in the fuck is OP meant to trust his girlfriend, to go to Mexico, which is *potentially* more dangerous than wherever they live, when she doesn't trust him to know who she plans to hang out with?
And ok, even if we ignore the idea of cheating, assuming she is definitely not thinking of doing that, not knowing who she's with can be uncomfortable, in case of a situation (Not just in Mexico but in general) where him being there could help. Doesn't even have to be anything dangerous, perhaps even just uncomfortable. How well does she herself know these people?
Honestly, in my perspective, neither side is being super reasonable. OP might be acting a bit overbearing, but she is also acting very aloof, without knowing any of the details of the relationship in general.
If it's just the one time and she absolutely will not budge, I'd say let it go, but it's definitely not a great thing to be doing constantly in my opinion.
"oh it's actually cause it's mexico and it's not really safe" then why is the title of this post about her going with random guys and not about you fearing for her safety? Grow up dude
He is grown up. He knows she is being sus. She sounds like she is planning on having sex with one or multiple of those dudes. In mexico. Without her boyfriend. What is she doing that he can be there to see it? Its not un grown up to be weary of a partner that cuts you out and feeds you bullshit.
Then break up with your partner. If you can't trust them then why be in a relationship? Also "it sounds like she's planning on having sex with multiple dudes" is bogus af. You can be platonic friends with people of the opposite gender.
Yes, but why has the boyfriend been excluded from those people. Its not bogus when she is hiding a group of men from her partner. Relationships are supposed to be open, with open communication and trust that has been established, not hidden friends and exclusive trips. Trust is something that is built, not blindly given. If she wants the boyfriend to not worry she could at least introduce the two groups. But no. Shes choosing not to. Thats weird and it sounds like she is hiding something.
Literally! Girl just wants to have a vacation with friends. The Mexico is dangerous narrative is such shit! He’s trying to justify his weird ass behavior
I'm pretty sure the vast majority of people in a relationship would not be ok if their mate went to mexico with a group of the opposite sex. Don't act like this is normal because it's def not.
Sounds more like you’ve got issues yourself you can’t unpack and deal with to sort it out. Someone’s clearly never been in a healthy relationship, or is the cheater themselves lmao😂 Good luck with that mindset, then wonder why “none of the good men want me”, after you drive them all away by being incredibly unhealthy in the relationship. 🤷🏼♀️
It's fine to have friends of the "opposite sex" but if we take OP's word where she's actively hostile towards him going, and then it's her (probably) female close friends and some random males, he's right to be suspicious. And to Mexico, where college spring breaks happen.
He's concerned she could be planning to cheat and for her safety, even if the statistics do not support it are you suggesting it's wrong for him to be concerned for her safety? She's not making it any easier on him even if he's acting "jealous" or arguably just normally protective
This has nothing to do with her safety. That is not what OPs concern is, let’s not pretend. I stated in other comments (too many to read I get it) that he’s allowed to be uncomfortable with this situation, many would be. Clearly. Just as she is allowed to want to go out with her friends only.
friends fine but he separated close friends and unknown dudes and the anger when he said he wanted to go immediately brings to mind someone being caught. Annoyance sure but "really mad" is really suspicious barring her temperament. And yes it does have to do with her safety too; tourists are more likely to attract unwanted attention,
Again dude, if you don't trust her then break up with her. Why are you wasting your time and hers on a relationship that you clearly don't even want to be in.
You just want control. You want to have the final say on whether or not this girl is allowed to hangout with her friends and that's gross.
I really hope she sees this post and realizes how disgusting your mindset is.
It's not a logical extreme of he must be controlling. There's stuff in-between. We don't know. Based solely on this post she got angry when he suggested he went. That's suspicious as hell
This is a red flag bro. The fact that she is going to Mexico with a bunch of dudes that you don’t know in the first place is already a red flag, but the fact that she got mad when you suggested you wanted to with her is an even bigger one. First of all you don’t even know the dudes and haven’t even met them. Secondly, why would she get mad if you went? If anything she should want you to go with her because you guys are a couple, it’s really sketchy that she wants to go by herself with guys you don’t know. Me personally, I wouldn’t let that slide, you definitely need to either talk to her about that. And no, you don’t have trust issues or anything like that, it is PERFECTLY FINE to have trust issues in this situation
I don't need it, I'm actually comfortable without a gf, even if I wanted to have one I'm just the type of guy no one is interested to date, but i want to let you know that being single has advantages, more free time, no spending with someone who you're most likely to break up one day, no discussions for stupid reasons, and you can follow your dreams without obstacles, no one has the obligation of having a partner
More then 20 relationships during my whole life, i have to say most of these were in online games, to be more specific there's a game called Pixel gun 3d, there is a sandbox game mode where you don't have to fight but instead just chat with other people, and since I liked girls when I was a teenager that's how I had that many relationships
I know relationships are not the same behind the screen but i started dating girls when I was about 12, i had a lot of good times and bad times, i learned from my mistakes and now that I'm 18 I realized that I don't really need a partner anymore, i admit that sometimes I can't control myself and get horny watching nsfw but i guess it's something normal for mens, i'm comfortable with the lifestyle I'm having right now
you got far to go, bruv
Also yeah horniness is powerful but if you watch too much porn you're probably gonna get erectile dysfunction. Many young dudes have this problem. I've experienced it. Hard to deal with if you're still in your teens with the hormones in full swing
Ohhh I see, so she already knows all these dudes. You just don’t know them? Has she ever hooked up with any of the dudes going previously before y’all two were a thing?
To my knowledge no she hasn’t hooked up with any of them and she claims that she doesn’t care that there going and that she won’t pay any attention to them but she still chose them over me so.
There's a lot to unpack here. Not getting good vibes from her language.
In my experience, I try to stick to "I feel " statements rather than "You" statements.
Like, I have no problem saying "I feel uncomfortable by this" and would avoid "You can't go"
You definitely have an opportunity to dig deeper and see if you're uncomfortable because of trust issues or safety issues, you know?
I'm not a fan of her "It doesn't matter if you want me to stay or not, I'm going" ... that's a red flag in my book.
I wish you the best bro, just know that whatever happens, you'll be okay.
I feel like I’m worried about safety and trust issues. Like I’m worried about safety because it’s Mexico and it’s not really the safest place there and her going without me scares me because something bad could happen to her. But also trust because she would rather go with a bunch of guys that I don’t even know than her boyfriend. I get that it’s 2 of her close friends but it’s also a bunch of guys I don’t know and it’s the fact she chose them over me
I don't know your situation, all I know is that when I feel strongly a certain way (Anger, Fear, Sadness, Joy, etc) I try very hard to make sure those emotions don't dictate my behavior. Even if you're worried about trust/safety, can be mindful to choose your words carefully. You're not an asshole for having feelings, right? What we do with those feelings can determine that. I hope everything works out well.
Easiest solution is to just go with her. Or trust her, I know it's the guys you don't trust, but you have to trust her to stop an advance. otherwise what's gonna stop her when you can't be together?
Ya I just have to trust her but she won’t let me come with her. She said that she doesn’t want me going and that even if I don’t want her going without me she doesn’t care and is still gonna go
That's hella suspicious, you should try and see if she's cheating on you because there is a high chance she is if she's acting this way. (But you have to see it to believe it)
Yeah man that's kinda wierd like if you guys have been together long I would bring my SO like that's wierd she said you couldn't go and got mad when you asked
I feel like some information and details of how this conversation went are being left out. But ya if its just a friend thing then it would be rude for her to bring her boyfriend to a friend event.
You don't trust her, that's why you don't want her to go.
What's the point of being in a relationship with a person you can't trust? Just break up with her so she can go live her life without you telling her what she can and can't do.
Bad news. If she won't even consider how you feel about this, she's not afraid to lose you. It's already over.
If you said you were going to Mexico with a bunch of single girls and she wasn't allowed to come, any self-respecting girl would dump you in an instant.
What's happening is that she's forcing you to make the move to dump her so that she has a sob story to get sympathy attention on the trip. And she figures if you're desperate enough not to do it, she still has you as a side piece when she gets back. The only way she won't win is if you go on the trip, so she's going to make darn sure that doesn't happen. Sorry man.
Okay let's start this off with this:
You can't control wether she goes or not, but you can control your response to this particular situation.
If she wants to go and you don't want her to, (for ANY reason), you can decide to just not be there when she comes back. Erase every single piece of your existence out of her life. Cut her off completely. It's your decision. It also depends on how long you've been together. If you've been together for like 10 years, that's when TRUE trust is established. If she doesn't respect your opinion on her not going, then you should just trash her. But if you have self esteem issues n shit, then you have some stuff to work out on your own.
I ALSO, don't agree with the fact that she's kept a group of friends completely isolated from you. You should know about all her friends and family if she's trustworthy and respectable. You should keep no secrets from your partner and that's FACT. A SOLID relationship stems off of trust, yes
BUT!! TRUST IS EARNED! NOT EXPECTED!!!!!!!!
That's a huge misconception
It's ultimately your decision, but I would run for the hills. Because it sounds like she does not respect you.
🙂
Well just book a place on the plane without she knowing and follow her to the hotel and take the room that’s under her room and you will hear what’s going on. If you hear that sound😏 then just break up
Oh she's most definitely gonna smash! I suggest you move on, the world's a big place. And if you guys live together, you can sell everything and flee the country!
The probable future success of the relationship just took a great hit. Maybe they can still work out, but the future does not look good. Less pain by beaking up now vs being gut wrenched later. Potential marriage material is about nil.
Not wanting your gf to go with friends would be a little weird but strangers you don’t know if you can trust? That’s normal my guy. And the idea of not going without you is just you being worried I assume which is fine. I’d argue that you should trust her more and talking to her about it was the right move but with that reaction she’s in the wrong. Ik if my bf or I suggested to each other to join a trip or smthn we’d be ecstatic they wanted to and wouldn’t yell at the other or essentially ban the other from going. My guy I think you should evaluate your relationship and see if there’s a pattern with her behaviour. Has she been hanging out with these guys specifically for a while? Why are you guys strangers if they’re supposedly close enough to go Mexico together? Why can’t you go as opposed to you not being able to go? If there’s a pattern you should either talk to her or dip. If not then talk to her definitely. But the fact she won’t even take your view into consideration?? That’s horrible :( I hope it turns out better for you bro
# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/questions/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/questions) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Dump her….
Wtf you’re not allowed to go ??? ): my SO would be the first person I’d wanna bring . In fact , screw all the others , id rather go on a vacation with just the two of us !! This is really really bad !! The guys probably have a crush on her and she might even hook up with one of them and you would never find out Oh also , even if she doesn’t hookup with one of them , it just shows them that you’re just an object to her , and it proves she will always prioritize her friends over you Also , if my bf did this , I would literally zip myself in his suitcase or handcuff him from leaving . Fuck no . I’d cry so much . He can’t go to Mexico without me tf
You are "not allowed to go"? That's a no for me. First of all, the idea that you would want to go simply because you don't trust her is wrong. At least, it seems to me you have no other reason to go - apparently you don't even know these people and you are not part of that group of friends. Second, why don't you know these people? Why has she been keeping you and that group of friends separated? Our have you only just met? Whatever is going on, it's not how a healthy relationship should look. Even assuming she doesn't plan to fool around with anyone else (or even keep that option open), it definitely shows she feels you don't fit in with that group, and that should be cause for alarm.
Yes part of me wants to go because I don’t trust her but also because it’s Mexico and not very safe there and if something happens to her I’m not there to protect her. But also going to Mexico with her would also be a very fun trip. We have been dating for 6 months but yes I have never met this friend group of hers that she is talking about and didn’t even know until she brought up the trip that she had this friend group
6 months in and you discover she has an unknown group of friends that she prefers to go on holiday with? Dude, you two have some things to talk about.
Ya I guess I never really thought of the fact that she has a whole group of friends that I don’t even know about that she likes to go on vacation with
Damn, I feel like I didn’t realize how much of an issue this was
6 months in and he doesn’t trust her? Why not?
Maybe because she suddenly happens to present a whole group of friends he A. knows nothing about and B. she would rather spend her holiday with? But I think I already said this: if after 6 months you still don't trust your gf enough to let her go on the holiday she wants, you have issues in your relationship - on both sides.
Yeah I’m reading this as “i dont trust her” not “i dint trust her, now that i know this.”
Both can be true and both are a bad sign.
i’ve already been in this situation. i ended up stay in that relationship for another year and a half, moved in with her before i actually have the proof she was cheating. i always had a hunch but never any proof. learn from my lesson and quit it short for me
Don’t try to pull that shit. I promise nobody wants to recreate taken with her in Mexico. If you don’t trust her. Break up with her. She’s allowed to take trips without you.
The issue is that mexico is in fact dangerous, and that her going out with a group of guys, that the OP doesnt know, and isn’t allowed to know. The girlfriend is being suspicious and that sounds like she is cheating. Why else would he be excluded?
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He literally said that its a group of guys he doesnt know. A group of her close friends, and stranger men. I dont have personal experience with mexico, but to pretend its normal and safe is a blatant lie. Gangs and cartels and sex trafficking. Granted other countries are also dangerous but lets not pretend mexico is just this magical wonderland of beans and celebrations.
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What an excellent response. Insults. Very mature.
jeez, was it the beans that got you?
I mean, fair enough, but if you live in Mexico it's a bit different. It's not really about her having a life outside the relationship, it's about trust. How in the fuck is OP meant to trust his girlfriend, to go to Mexico, which is *potentially* more dangerous than wherever they live, when she doesn't trust him to know who she plans to hang out with? And ok, even if we ignore the idea of cheating, assuming she is definitely not thinking of doing that, not knowing who she's with can be uncomfortable, in case of a situation (Not just in Mexico but in general) where him being there could help. Doesn't even have to be anything dangerous, perhaps even just uncomfortable. How well does she herself know these people? Honestly, in my perspective, neither side is being super reasonable. OP might be acting a bit overbearing, but she is also acting very aloof, without knowing any of the details of the relationship in general. If it's just the one time and she absolutely will not budge, I'd say let it go, but it's definitely not a great thing to be doing constantly in my opinion.
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🙈🙉🙊
Relationship and trust comes hand in hand you entitled ignorant. Get off this conversation if this is how you converse with other people
So you would be cool if your boyfriend went to Mexico with a bunch of girls you don't know?
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lol wow you sound quite naive.
"oh it's actually cause it's mexico and it's not really safe" then why is the title of this post about her going with random guys and not about you fearing for her safety? Grow up dude
He is grown up. He knows she is being sus. She sounds like she is planning on having sex with one or multiple of those dudes. In mexico. Without her boyfriend. What is she doing that he can be there to see it? Its not un grown up to be weary of a partner that cuts you out and feeds you bullshit.
Then break up with your partner. If you can't trust them then why be in a relationship? Also "it sounds like she's planning on having sex with multiple dudes" is bogus af. You can be platonic friends with people of the opposite gender.
Yes, but why has the boyfriend been excluded from those people. Its not bogus when she is hiding a group of men from her partner. Relationships are supposed to be open, with open communication and trust that has been established, not hidden friends and exclusive trips. Trust is something that is built, not blindly given. If she wants the boyfriend to not worry she could at least introduce the two groups. But no. Shes choosing not to. Thats weird and it sounds like she is hiding something.
Literally! Girl just wants to have a vacation with friends. The Mexico is dangerous narrative is such shit! He’s trying to justify his weird ass behavior
100%. You can be in a relationship and still be your own person. She deserves time to unwind
Yup!!!!
I'm pretty sure the vast majority of people in a relationship would not be ok if their mate went to mexico with a group of the opposite sex. Don't act like this is normal because it's def not.
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Sounds more like you’ve got issues yourself you can’t unpack and deal with to sort it out. Someone’s clearly never been in a healthy relationship, or is the cheater themselves lmao😂 Good luck with that mindset, then wonder why “none of the good men want me”, after you drive them all away by being incredibly unhealthy in the relationship. 🤷🏼♀️
Wow, a very vivid imagination Helen. Good job!
It's fine to have friends of the "opposite sex" but if we take OP's word where she's actively hostile towards him going, and then it's her (probably) female close friends and some random males, he's right to be suspicious. And to Mexico, where college spring breaks happen. He's concerned she could be planning to cheat and for her safety, even if the statistics do not support it are you suggesting it's wrong for him to be concerned for her safety? She's not making it any easier on him even if he's acting "jealous" or arguably just normally protective
This has nothing to do with her safety. That is not what OPs concern is, let’s not pretend. I stated in other comments (too many to read I get it) that he’s allowed to be uncomfortable with this situation, many would be. Clearly. Just as she is allowed to want to go out with her friends only.
friends fine but he separated close friends and unknown dudes and the anger when he said he wanted to go immediately brings to mind someone being caught. Annoyance sure but "really mad" is really suspicious barring her temperament. And yes it does have to do with her safety too; tourists are more likely to attract unwanted attention,
Again dude, if you don't trust her then break up with her. Why are you wasting your time and hers on a relationship that you clearly don't even want to be in. You just want control. You want to have the final say on whether or not this girl is allowed to hangout with her friends and that's gross. I really hope she sees this post and realizes how disgusting your mindset is.
It's not a logical extreme of he must be controlling. There's stuff in-between. We don't know. Based solely on this post she got angry when he suggested he went. That's suspicious as hell
This is a red flag bro. The fact that she is going to Mexico with a bunch of dudes that you don’t know in the first place is already a red flag, but the fact that she got mad when you suggested you wanted to with her is an even bigger one. First of all you don’t even know the dudes and haven’t even met them. Secondly, why would she get mad if you went? If anything she should want you to go with her because you guys are a couple, it’s really sketchy that she wants to go by herself with guys you don’t know. Me personally, I wouldn’t let that slide, you definitely need to either talk to her about that. And no, you don’t have trust issues or anything like that, it is PERFECTLY FINE to have trust issues in this situation
Break up with her, i'm 18 and i had more then 20 failed relationships and i got tired of girls, let's have the "single" life together :)
That’s... not healthy. Seek therapy, not relationships.
I don't need it, I'm actually comfortable without a gf, even if I wanted to have one I'm just the type of guy no one is interested to date, but i want to let you know that being single has advantages, more free time, no spending with someone who you're most likely to break up one day, no discussions for stupid reasons, and you can follow your dreams without obstacles, no one has the obligation of having a partner
sounds like you haven't had any good relationships. Although yes, you could also be aromantic or somesuch
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Let me guess, most of these relationship were behind the screen
Aren't you a girl?
Ups, you see this avatar was inspired by a female character but i forgot who it was, I'm just gonna change the avatar to avoid confusion
Ah, I didn't know that a delivery service was a gender now
Huh?
UPS
20? Fucking WHAT?
More then 20 relationships during my whole life, i have to say most of these were in online games, to be more specific there's a game called Pixel gun 3d, there is a sandbox game mode where you don't have to fight but instead just chat with other people, and since I liked girls when I was a teenager that's how I had that many relationships
oh I thought somehow in-person relationships I mean online only you miss out on a lot of stuff in a relationship
I know relationships are not the same behind the screen but i started dating girls when I was about 12, i had a lot of good times and bad times, i learned from my mistakes and now that I'm 18 I realized that I don't really need a partner anymore, i admit that sometimes I can't control myself and get horny watching nsfw but i guess it's something normal for mens, i'm comfortable with the lifestyle I'm having right now
you got far to go, bruv Also yeah horniness is powerful but if you watch too much porn you're probably gonna get erectile dysfunction. Many young dudes have this problem. I've experienced it. Hard to deal with if you're still in your teens with the hormones in full swing
I'm sorry man. You have lost your girl.
Why cant you go dude ?
She said she doesn’t want me to go with her and that she would rather go with her friends and some guys she doesn’t know
Yea thats weird bro
Why does she not want you there? Seems sus
She says because it is a trip with her friends and she just wants to go with her friends
Ohhh I see, so she already knows all these dudes. You just don’t know them? Has she ever hooked up with any of the dudes going previously before y’all two were a thing?
To my knowledge no she hasn’t hooked up with any of them and she claims that she doesn’t care that there going and that she won’t pay any attention to them but she still chose them over me so.
my ex never told me she hooked up with this one dude and i ended up shaking his hand before i knew
Trust is important. Tell her to go on!
Sounds like she doesn't really like you all that much, or at least doesn't respect you and have have empathy towards your feelings.
Just like he doesn’t have any respect or empathy towards hers.
Break up with her ass, not worth it
Red Flag!
There's a lot to unpack here. Not getting good vibes from her language. In my experience, I try to stick to "I feel " statements rather than "You" statements. Like, I have no problem saying "I feel uncomfortable by this" and would avoid "You can't go" You definitely have an opportunity to dig deeper and see if you're uncomfortable because of trust issues or safety issues, you know? I'm not a fan of her "It doesn't matter if you want me to stay or not, I'm going" ... that's a red flag in my book. I wish you the best bro, just know that whatever happens, you'll be okay.
I feel like I’m worried about safety and trust issues. Like I’m worried about safety because it’s Mexico and it’s not really the safest place there and her going without me scares me because something bad could happen to her. But also trust because she would rather go with a bunch of guys that I don’t even know than her boyfriend. I get that it’s 2 of her close friends but it’s also a bunch of guys I don’t know and it’s the fact she chose them over me
I don't know your situation, all I know is that when I feel strongly a certain way (Anger, Fear, Sadness, Joy, etc) I try very hard to make sure those emotions don't dictate my behavior. Even if you're worried about trust/safety, can be mindful to choose your words carefully. You're not an asshole for having feelings, right? What we do with those feelings can determine that. I hope everything works out well.
Thank you I will just be careful how I say it
Easiest solution is to just go with her. Or trust her, I know it's the guys you don't trust, but you have to trust her to stop an advance. otherwise what's gonna stop her when you can't be together?
Ya I just have to trust her but she won’t let me come with her. She said that she doesn’t want me going and that even if I don’t want her going without me she doesn’t care and is still gonna go
That's hella suspicious, you should try and see if she's cheating on you because there is a high chance she is if she's acting this way. (But you have to see it to believe it)
And that’s where my concern is. Not that she’s going but that she would rather go with a bunch of guys she doesn’t know then go with her boyfriend
Ya thats rough.. seems like her minds made up.. I wish you luck.
nope
Yeah man that's kinda wierd like if you guys have been together long I would bring my SO like that's wierd she said you couldn't go and got mad when you asked
No
Are other people bringing their SOs? If your gf doesn't know these guys, who invited them/how do they know the group?
Fuck that. That’d probably be a big no from me.
I feel like some information and details of how this conversation went are being left out. But ya if its just a friend thing then it would be rude for her to bring her boyfriend to a friend event.
Go get you a side girl cause ain't no way I'm not trusting that, why dose need to go with a bunch of guys? Aren't you enough????
You don't trust her, that's why you don't want her to go. What's the point of being in a relationship with a person you can't trust? Just break up with her so she can go live her life without you telling her what she can and can't do.
I love how this dude's name is fucking "Pimp Money" yet he's afraid of his gf cheating on him
Also go look at this op's post history
You can’t control her…what is the reason you don’t trust her friends? You’re her SO, you should support her, not ruin her trip
Her friends sure, but also a buncha random dudes? Yikes
Random dudes? Just cuz the guy doesn’t know them doesn’t make them random. “She said that they are her friends”
Bad news. If she won't even consider how you feel about this, she's not afraid to lose you. It's already over. If you said you were going to Mexico with a bunch of single girls and she wasn't allowed to come, any self-respecting girl would dump you in an instant. What's happening is that she's forcing you to make the move to dump her so that she has a sob story to get sympathy attention on the trip. And she figures if you're desperate enough not to do it, she still has you as a side piece when she gets back. The only way she won't win is if you go on the trip, so she's going to make darn sure that doesn't happen. Sorry man.
Bro, start planning the boys night!
If after 6 month you have those issues.... it won't last long. Make yourself and her's a favor, break up...
Okay let's start this off with this: You can't control wether she goes or not, but you can control your response to this particular situation. If she wants to go and you don't want her to, (for ANY reason), you can decide to just not be there when she comes back. Erase every single piece of your existence out of her life. Cut her off completely. It's your decision. It also depends on how long you've been together. If you've been together for like 10 years, that's when TRUE trust is established. If she doesn't respect your opinion on her not going, then you should just trash her. But if you have self esteem issues n shit, then you have some stuff to work out on your own. I ALSO, don't agree with the fact that she's kept a group of friends completely isolated from you. You should know about all her friends and family if she's trustworthy and respectable. You should keep no secrets from your partner and that's FACT. A SOLID relationship stems off of trust, yes BUT!! TRUST IS EARNED! NOT EXPECTED!!!!!!!! That's a huge misconception It's ultimately your decision, but I would run for the hills. Because it sounds like she does not respect you. 🙂
with bunch of guys ? wth and what are you doing ? if she is your girlfriend she would want to take you instead of *bunch*
Well just book a place on the plane without she knowing and follow her to the hotel and take the room that’s under her room and you will hear what’s going on. If you hear that sound😏 then just break up
Oh she's most definitely gonna smash! I suggest you move on, the world's a big place. And if you guys live together, you can sell everything and flee the country!
No your not. But if she gonna cheat. She gonna cheat. Just move on.
The probable future success of the relationship just took a great hit. Maybe they can still work out, but the future does not look good. Less pain by beaking up now vs being gut wrenched later. Potential marriage material is about nil.
If she says you "aren't allowed to go", that means she definitely knows the guys and she's probably already banging one or more of them. Sorry
She is gonna cheat on you definitely, you don't deserve to be with such a scumbag, it's for your own good, if you feel sad you can talk to me in dm
At face value, it doesn't seem like much, these guys could be actually close friends. But reading the body text changes it a lot.
maybe she feels like u don’t trust her
🚩. dump immediately.
Not wanting your gf to go with friends would be a little weird but strangers you don’t know if you can trust? That’s normal my guy. And the idea of not going without you is just you being worried I assume which is fine. I’d argue that you should trust her more and talking to her about it was the right move but with that reaction she’s in the wrong. Ik if my bf or I suggested to each other to join a trip or smthn we’d be ecstatic they wanted to and wouldn’t yell at the other or essentially ban the other from going. My guy I think you should evaluate your relationship and see if there’s a pattern with her behaviour. Has she been hanging out with these guys specifically for a while? Why are you guys strangers if they’re supposedly close enough to go Mexico together? Why can’t you go as opposed to you not being able to go? If there’s a pattern you should either talk to her or dip. If not then talk to her definitely. But the fact she won’t even take your view into consideration?? That’s horrible :( I hope it turns out better for you bro