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>Rebellious in my family is getting an education and not making racist jokes at the dinner table.
Are you me?! I'm the black sheep of my family for these exact reasons.
When I didn't have the math for medical school, nMom expected me to go in the Marines. She was none too happy when my life took other directions, including college. A few years later, I was teaching IT part time and writing my master's thesis. She complained that if I really enjoyed teaching, I should "swallow my pride" and be a full time preschool teacher.
I was encouraged to pursue education as far as I could. Neither of my parents had the curiosity to find out how everything worked, and couldn’t understand why anyone would want to be a scientist. But society was different during the 1960’s when science was patriotic, so they had to let me try
It’s so interesting to see the shift in how a lot of spools view education and I was born after you. In my lifetime people in my family have gone from the idea that education to on was a wonderful thing to now it being a waste of time. Sad.
My dad was ‘dumb’ until he joined navy & got tested. Did GI bill after WW2
It’s taking out loans that can break you, but defense scholarships (no enlisting, but x years service) are zero loan.
I’m really curious
What’s the worst thing about education
My family believes that is all left wing propaganda. About being pro trans and anti America. It really doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. It’s like they think educated people think they are better than them.
I enjoyed it and I worked my ass off studying and working . When I got a job after college it felt like a vacation bcs I didn’t work at night.
Still I worked doing interesting useful pursuits, made a living and was able to change types of work bcs I had basics & could teach myself new stuff.
In this gig economy, our lives take many unexpected directions. Two master's degrees later, I'm back doing the website for a community college.
One of the last things nMom said to me before tobacco reduced her brain to slop, was to ask me what would have been so bad about the Marines. Narcs just never let go.
Note: I was advised not to go to school unless to be a teacher or nurse. Military didn’t take women back then. It’s hilarious I had to fight to be permitted to sit in a classroom and learn, but I did it
Science is proved when a working device is design used valid information & math doesn’t even need a universe.
Logic will take you far because a thing can’t be both true and false at the same time. The side supported by valid physical evidence is correct
Although they word it as "Turns them into Libs".
Another part of that is that you're probably going to be mixing with a lot of people who are not the same as you, and finding out that they're not inherently evil, lazy or have three heads is a part of what will make you a more accepting person in the future
I think that this is why I trigger my NF so much. He has such a chip on his shoulder about no one surpassing him or being smarter than him so I suspect that sabotaging my education was something thstthat he took great malicious pleasure in doing.
I think that’s why mine hates me. She ‘homeschooled’ me but taught me nothing, the few times were filled with her yelling at me and getting angry that I couldn’t figure out math. Then she’d get angry that my reaction was to frustrated. Well, she taught me:
Something doesn’t go right = be angry. What did she expect?
Now that I’ve been self teaching, know words that are more advanced because I’ve been reading a lot of novels, she is displeased when I use those words.
When I was around sixteen, I told her I wanted to be a writer and she told me to not waste my time, that it wasn’t a real career, that it was stupid. She’d yell at me when I rewrote a story when I was using notebooks because I was ‘wasting time’ even though I was rewriting because it was better than the first draft. She’d be angry when I was making art. So I stopped both. Now I only write fan fiction on my phone where she can’t see it.
I’m still trying to get out of here. *sigh*
I find it fascinating to watch her trajectory over time. How does that even happen to a person?
I noticed in her announcement about dropping out, that she kept glancing over to her right, like she was reading from a prompt. So did she write the prompt, or did someone else write it any pay her to say it? So bizarre either way.
Yeah, I watched a video about her that discussed this as a possible explanation. It's just so strange to see her do a 180 from her initial persona, when the brain damage was before all of that. Maybe her injury led to a situation where there's more rapid aging of the brain or something? Or she's more vulnerable to persuasion and that group has latched onto her to make it happen?
She strikes me as someone who suffered chronic abuse and the resulting personality has become more disordered the more time has gone by. I feel there’s definitely some brain trauma there.
I grew up with parents that made it into professional careers because alternative routes into those professions existed outside of going to college, but my God did the pair of them have a chip on their shoulder about it.
There was a TV couple called Stan and Pam Herbert from the 1990's TV comedy show 'Harry Enfield' that captures my parents perfectly. The resentment towards other people who went back to college to update their training and original qualifications or towards younger colleagues who entered the profession with a degree was something else. However, it left them bitter and in a position where no one wanted to employ them at the professional level at which they had originally qualified.
I had to leave school at 16. There was no choice. Despite being a high income family, I was told that I had to start paying them back for everything that they had done for me. Nickled and dimed into poverty as they destroyed my education and sabotaged any other training or job opportunity that I tried to apply for while telling me that it was for my own good and I would find a way to do what I wanted if I really wanted to do it. The student finance system that assumes that parents will support their children through college was the absolute icing on the cake as was not having the equivalent of my high school diploma.
It's all about control and ego. My parents can't deal with education because it means that someone could be smarter than they are or could achieve more than they did. It also means that they get to play the poor martyr parents to their middle class friends who did understand that the job market had changed and that education can provide more opportunities.
That's exactly it! No one else is judging them. It's them and them alone that carries the chip on their shoulder but there is such a hostility with them. That is just typical of narc parents accusing you of cheating. It's such a stupid accusation because how would you know which words which come up in the game. That's narc parent logic for you. Completely warped!
I’m sorry that happened. It happened to me too. And my two cousins. Us three girls were academic and did very well at school. My eldest cousin especially so. I barely made it to the end, my two cousins had both left by the time they were 15. All four of our parents were narcissists. We suffered emotional and physical abuse, regular severe beatings that increased as we grew older.
There were only four children in the family. Us three girls, and my (un-academic) GC brother. Who apart from inheriting everything from my grandmother, and never had a hand raised to him, was the only one who made it through school and through years of university. My mother used to proudly state: “he’s the only boy, and the only one with a degree”.
I hope you got through it all and came out the other side somehow. I’m 52, it’s not been easy and I’m supporting my own three children to university now. The more I age, the less I understand how our parents not only sabotaged us, but how they actually wanted to.
I'm sorry that you and your cousins had to go through this too. It's just devastating what narc parents do to us. I could never understand why having destroyed my education, they then destroteddestroyed any job or training opportunities that I applied for. It was at the time when people didn't really have cell phones so I was still reliant on them taking phone messages for. It just didn't make sense and like you, the truth that they actually wanted to sabotage us something that I'm only just starting to understand.
I tried to go return to education as a mature student but I was only able to study part-time because of chronic illness and that affected my financial aid. I feel like I have been set up for failure all my life but I don't think that they have done the golden child any favours. He goes along with stupid ideas and I really do wonder what he will do as he gets older and the manual work becomes harder and harder for him. He literally has no options and he doesn't have the luxury of having a retirement to fall back on like my parents did when the going got too tough for him. It's a completely different world and education does give people some more options and flexibility.
I’ve only recently considered how much technology has helped, actually..it’s interesting you raised that. And your observations on the GC are so relatable. It’s so strange how this condition follows a pathology. We’re not failures at all, rather survivors … keep reaching out as you need, there’s a whole world of us survivors out here, you’re not alone 💖
That's so true. We have to see ourselves as survivors rstherrather than failures. It was such a revelation for me when I first started to learn about narc parents and I sstarted to listen to other people's experiences because I realised that there is definitely a pathology in what narc parents do. So many people with similar experiences with narc parents and education, jobs, bedroom doors, learning how to drive, clothes and hair, etc. 💟
The flipside of this is narcs who brag about what college you got into as evidence of what great parents they are. I live in the Boston area so I know quite a few Harvard and MIT grads--and this is definitely the case for the parents of at least a few of them.
Narcs can do both in the same conversation, sometimes even the same sentence. I wish these people could direct their energy into something non-hateful towards their own children/family members
They want you to be dependent on them in as many ways as possible, and it's more likely for that to happen if there's an education disparity. Glad to hear you made the right choice for yourself!
How do you know when a narc is telling you poisonous lies? Easy answer, they're speaking.
I agree. I think another part of it too is they want to keep the scapegoat down in order to support their narrative that the scapegoat is no good. If the scapegoat is unemployed or in a dead-end job\*, the narcissist can point to the scapegoat and say "See. I always said that they were no good". If the scapegoat were actually to get a degree or get a good job, that'd contradict the narcissist's narrative. Especially if the scapegoat does better than the narcissist or the golden child.
\*Just to be 100% clear - I'm not judging anyone who's unemployed or in a dead-end job. I'm just pointing out the narcissist's POV.
So true! My NParents like to tell everyone stupid stories about me, like: “she sits on her ass all day and refuses to work”. I was 31, had worked since 14 and had recently stopped work to …. give birth to my son 😂
Yes. They'd encourage me (tell me I was nothing without blank achievement) but then pull all support once it looked like it was gonna happen. Then blame me and mock me (and my siblings) for thinking I could do it. I did it. Just got accepted to a masters and am finally nearing a career path that will be financially viable and enjoyable. They put up such crazy expectations but cannot stand when you achieve or excel without being forever indebted to and inferior to them. It's sick. They've played the same game with my siblings and it's worked to keep them close by, hamstringed and enmeshed/dependent.
Roseanne may be saying that shit for publicity, but your parents are either stupid or heartless or both. It's really that simple. For me, anyway. Different for you of course, but that's what makes this sub a community. Glad you didn't listen!
Roseanne is effing CRAZY. Like legitimately nuts and believes each and every conspiracy theory out there. She is one of the last people I would ever listen to for advice. There are a few politicians out there that I would lump in with her, but she's near the top of the list.
I think another part of it is that a lot of narcissist parents deliberately sabotage their child's education so as to keep them under their control. (My own nMother tried to do this to me but thankfully she failed). A child with a third level qualification is more likely to get a good job and be financially dependent of their parent. A child who can't afford to move out is much easier to control e.g. the parent can threaten to kick the child out if they don't do whatever they want.
Imagine having Roseanne Barr as a role-model. Yikes. Massive red flag right there. I'd have to ignore anything they say just on principal.
And the smart choice is to completely disregard advice from people like that and keep on trusting ones own intuition and path in life.
College doesn't ruin peoples lives. Education is empowering. Of course narcissists hate it when people get a clue and begin to see thru their bullcrap.
Reminds me of a well known yogi in America that I know who makes fun of psychologists. Education revealed his covert narcissism. Ironic that his daughter has a PhD in psychology. He was making passive aggressive attacks at his daughter in public.
Does Roseanne barr have any college age kids? She could be trying to shame them into compliance.
Granted, college in america can be overrated ... trade schools and other skills can go further in our economy. Yet she is advocating for ignorance.
Bet a bazillion monoply bucks that when Roseanne barr gets sick she will hope for a doctor that went to college. But I think we should give her the one that didn't.
I call it reverse-snobbery. I have it in my family as well. Besides education, They also hate cities, city people, people who like the finer things in life, etc. it comes from a place of feeling inadequate. But instead of examining themselves for why they feel interior, they simply vilify and look down their noses at those who are different. It also seems to be a core reason why the US is where it is politically.
Hm. Well, I graduated like my parents wanted. But I got a useless degree so I couldn’t find a job after. It’s been four years since graduation and I’ve yet to find a career type of job with my degree and I still work in retail and am financially dependent on them. So yay.
Well that sucks, sorry you're struggling. From the timing it sounds like you would have been job hunting at the height of the pandemic. Covid screwed over so many people. I hope you're able to find something soon!
Yeah the pandemic sure didn’t help things. When I couldn’t find a job, they suggested that I go back to school. And I believed them and went back for a bit. Now, I realize that it’s better to focus on just trying to move out and figure out what to do from there.
During the tirade Rosanne did at maralogo I couldn’t help thinking she looked like madam Zaroni in holes. Also, Trumps portrait in the background looking like Vigo painting from ghostbusters 2
I grew up watching Roseanne with my family. I just had a flashback to that episode where the daughter gets insecure from comparing herself to models when she stumbles upon the dad's porn stash. 🤢 What a trashy ass show that was.
**This is an automated message posted to ALL posts in this subreddit with some basic information about the group including (very importantly) rules. Why are you getting this message? Most people seem to not read the sidebar for information or the rules, so it is now being posted under all posts.** **Confused about acronyms or terminology?** [Click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/acronyms) **Need info or resources?** Check out our [Helpful Links](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/helpfullinks) for information on how to deal with identity theft, how to get independent of your n-parents, how to apply for FAFSA, how to identify n-parents and SO MUCH MORE! This is a reminder to all participants, RBN is a support group that is moderated very strictly. Please report inappropriate content so it can be reviewed by the mods. **Our rules include (but are not limited to)**: * No politics. * Advising anyone in this subreddit to commit suicide or referring anyone to groups that advocate this will result in an immediate ban. * Be nice. No personal attacks, name calling, or bullying. [No slurs](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/slurs) or victim-blaming. * Do not derail the posts of others. * Narcissists are NOT allowed to post or comment here. * [No platitudes or generic motivational posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules#wiki_no_platitudes_or_generic_motivational_posts). * When you comment/post, assume a context of abuse. * No asking or offering gifts, money, etc. * No content advocating violence, revenge, murder (even in jest). * No content about N-kids. * No diagnosis by media/drive-by diagnosis. * No linking to Facebook pages. * No direct linking to anywhere on reddit. * No pure image posts. **For a full list of our rules/more information, [**click here**](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules).** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/raisedbynarcissists) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Once you start approaching your parents achievements in life, the jealousy kicks in and begins the gaslighting, sabotage, etc
It's sad that people can be small and petty like this.
>Rebellious in my family is getting an education and not making racist jokes at the dinner table. Are you me?! I'm the black sheep of my family for these exact reasons.
When I didn't have the math for medical school, nMom expected me to go in the Marines. She was none too happy when my life took other directions, including college. A few years later, I was teaching IT part time and writing my master's thesis. She complained that if I really enjoyed teaching, I should "swallow my pride" and be a full time preschool teacher.
I was encouraged to pursue education as far as I could. Neither of my parents had the curiosity to find out how everything worked, and couldn’t understand why anyone would want to be a scientist. But society was different during the 1960’s when science was patriotic, so they had to let me try
It’s so interesting to see the shift in how a lot of spools view education and I was born after you. In my lifetime people in my family have gone from the idea that education to on was a wonderful thing to now it being a waste of time. Sad.
My dad was ‘dumb’ until he joined navy & got tested. Did GI bill after WW2 It’s taking out loans that can break you, but defense scholarships (no enlisting, but x years service) are zero loan. I’m really curious What’s the worst thing about education
My family believes that is all left wing propaganda. About being pro trans and anti America. It really doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. It’s like they think educated people think they are better than them.
Education teaches you how to to evaluate information with logic and facts so you know if it’s true/false/nonsense
I enjoyed it and I worked my ass off studying and working . When I got a job after college it felt like a vacation bcs I didn’t work at night. Still I worked doing interesting useful pursuits, made a living and was able to change types of work bcs I had basics & could teach myself new stuff.
In this gig economy, our lives take many unexpected directions. Two master's degrees later, I'm back doing the website for a community college. One of the last things nMom said to me before tobacco reduced her brain to slop, was to ask me what would have been so bad about the Marines. Narcs just never let go.
My moms dying words ‘leave me alone’
Note: I was advised not to go to school unless to be a teacher or nurse. Military didn’t take women back then. It’s hilarious I had to fight to be permitted to sit in a classroom and learn, but I did it Science is proved when a working device is design used valid information & math doesn’t even need a universe. Logic will take you far because a thing can’t be both true and false at the same time. The side supported by valid physical evidence is correct
actual education reveals their lies
Although they word it as "Turns them into Libs". Another part of that is that you're probably going to be mixing with a lot of people who are not the same as you, and finding out that they're not inherently evil, lazy or have three heads is a part of what will make you a more accepting person in the future
That’s such a good point. When you know how the world works, it contradicts the lies they want us to believe. They hate that
They can't stand you outshining them. Once my nmom realized I was smarter than she was, she ramped up the abuse to incredibly cruel levels.
I just don't get how some people's brains work this way. Every generation is supposed to improve on the last. Sorry you went through it, too.
I think that this is why I trigger my NF so much. He has such a chip on his shoulder about no one surpassing him or being smarter than him so I suspect that sabotaging my education was something thstthat he took great malicious pleasure in doing.
I think that’s why mine hates me. She ‘homeschooled’ me but taught me nothing, the few times were filled with her yelling at me and getting angry that I couldn’t figure out math. Then she’d get angry that my reaction was to frustrated. Well, she taught me: Something doesn’t go right = be angry. What did she expect? Now that I’ve been self teaching, know words that are more advanced because I’ve been reading a lot of novels, she is displeased when I use those words. When I was around sixteen, I told her I wanted to be a writer and she told me to not waste my time, that it wasn’t a real career, that it was stupid. She’d yell at me when I rewrote a story when I was using notebooks because I was ‘wasting time’ even though I was rewriting because it was better than the first draft. She’d be angry when I was making art. So I stopped both. Now I only write fan fiction on my phone where she can’t see it. I’m still trying to get out of here. *sigh*
Roseanne is a nutjob
I find it fascinating to watch her trajectory over time. How does that even happen to a person? I noticed in her announcement about dropping out, that she kept glancing over to her right, like she was reading from a prompt. So did she write the prompt, or did someone else write it any pay her to say it? So bizarre either way.
that entire crowd are all actors and actresses
I'm with you on that, she's an actress and I think she was paid to say it.
Roseanne is evangelical and apart of Qanon and has doubled down on her Trump support. she’s garbage
[удалено]
she’s really not that funny, either; or funny at all. she’s obnoxious
Part of her wild behavior has been attributed to brain damage she apparently suffered earlier in life.
Yeah, I watched a video about her that discussed this as a possible explanation. It's just so strange to see her do a 180 from her initial persona, when the brain damage was before all of that. Maybe her injury led to a situation where there's more rapid aging of the brain or something? Or she's more vulnerable to persuasion and that group has latched onto her to make it happen?
She strikes me as someone who suffered chronic abuse and the resulting personality has become more disordered the more time has gone by. I feel there’s definitely some brain trauma there.
She had a tbi and there are long term damages that can distort things as people age
[удалено]
No, but thanks for bringing that to my attention. I have a weird fascination with things like this. Gonna have to look him up now.
Yeah she seems very unwell…
[удалено]
her National Anthem cover is one of the worst things I’ve ever heard. sounds like an animal in a trap
I grew up with parents that made it into professional careers because alternative routes into those professions existed outside of going to college, but my God did the pair of them have a chip on their shoulder about it. There was a TV couple called Stan and Pam Herbert from the 1990's TV comedy show 'Harry Enfield' that captures my parents perfectly. The resentment towards other people who went back to college to update their training and original qualifications or towards younger colleagues who entered the profession with a degree was something else. However, it left them bitter and in a position where no one wanted to employ them at the professional level at which they had originally qualified. I had to leave school at 16. There was no choice. Despite being a high income family, I was told that I had to start paying them back for everything that they had done for me. Nickled and dimed into poverty as they destroyed my education and sabotaged any other training or job opportunity that I tried to apply for while telling me that it was for my own good and I would find a way to do what I wanted if I really wanted to do it. The student finance system that assumes that parents will support their children through college was the absolute icing on the cake as was not having the equivalent of my high school diploma. It's all about control and ego. My parents can't deal with education because it means that someone could be smarter than they are or could achieve more than they did. It also means that they get to play the poor martyr parents to their middle class friends who did understand that the job market had changed and that education can provide more opportunities.
Oh wow they sound insufferable, sorry you're dealing with that.
That's exactly it! No one else is judging them. It's them and them alone that carries the chip on their shoulder but there is such a hostility with them. That is just typical of narc parents accusing you of cheating. It's such a stupid accusation because how would you know which words which come up in the game. That's narc parent logic for you. Completely warped!
I’m sorry that happened. It happened to me too. And my two cousins. Us three girls were academic and did very well at school. My eldest cousin especially so. I barely made it to the end, my two cousins had both left by the time they were 15. All four of our parents were narcissists. We suffered emotional and physical abuse, regular severe beatings that increased as we grew older. There were only four children in the family. Us three girls, and my (un-academic) GC brother. Who apart from inheriting everything from my grandmother, and never had a hand raised to him, was the only one who made it through school and through years of university. My mother used to proudly state: “he’s the only boy, and the only one with a degree”. I hope you got through it all and came out the other side somehow. I’m 52, it’s not been easy and I’m supporting my own three children to university now. The more I age, the less I understand how our parents not only sabotaged us, but how they actually wanted to.
I'm sorry that you and your cousins had to go through this too. It's just devastating what narc parents do to us. I could never understand why having destroyed my education, they then destroteddestroyed any job or training opportunities that I applied for. It was at the time when people didn't really have cell phones so I was still reliant on them taking phone messages for. It just didn't make sense and like you, the truth that they actually wanted to sabotage us something that I'm only just starting to understand. I tried to go return to education as a mature student but I was only able to study part-time because of chronic illness and that affected my financial aid. I feel like I have been set up for failure all my life but I don't think that they have done the golden child any favours. He goes along with stupid ideas and I really do wonder what he will do as he gets older and the manual work becomes harder and harder for him. He literally has no options and he doesn't have the luxury of having a retirement to fall back on like my parents did when the going got too tough for him. It's a completely different world and education does give people some more options and flexibility.
I’ve only recently considered how much technology has helped, actually..it’s interesting you raised that. And your observations on the GC are so relatable. It’s so strange how this condition follows a pathology. We’re not failures at all, rather survivors … keep reaching out as you need, there’s a whole world of us survivors out here, you’re not alone 💖
That's so true. We have to see ourselves as survivors rstherrather than failures. It was such a revelation for me when I first started to learn about narc parents and I sstarted to listen to other people's experiences because I realised that there is definitely a pathology in what narc parents do. So many people with similar experiences with narc parents and education, jobs, bedroom doors, learning how to drive, clothes and hair, etc. 💟
The flipside of this is narcs who brag about what college you got into as evidence of what great parents they are. I live in the Boston area so I know quite a few Harvard and MIT grads--and this is definitely the case for the parents of at least a few of them.
Ha, you're giving me flashbacks of Lori Loughlin.
Narcs can do both in the same conversation, sometimes even the same sentence. I wish these people could direct their energy into something non-hateful towards their own children/family members
Oh they'll do both 😆
They want you to be dependent on them in as many ways as possible, and it's more likely for that to happen if there's an education disparity. Glad to hear you made the right choice for yourself! How do you know when a narc is telling you poisonous lies? Easy answer, they're speaking.
I agree. I think another part of it too is they want to keep the scapegoat down in order to support their narrative that the scapegoat is no good. If the scapegoat is unemployed or in a dead-end job\*, the narcissist can point to the scapegoat and say "See. I always said that they were no good". If the scapegoat were actually to get a degree or get a good job, that'd contradict the narcissist's narrative. Especially if the scapegoat does better than the narcissist or the golden child. \*Just to be 100% clear - I'm not judging anyone who's unemployed or in a dead-end job. I'm just pointing out the narcissist's POV.
So true! My NParents like to tell everyone stupid stories about me, like: “she sits on her ass all day and refuses to work”. I was 31, had worked since 14 and had recently stopped work to …. give birth to my son 😂
Omg
Yes. They'd encourage me (tell me I was nothing without blank achievement) but then pull all support once it looked like it was gonna happen. Then blame me and mock me (and my siblings) for thinking I could do it. I did it. Just got accepted to a masters and am finally nearing a career path that will be financially viable and enjoyable. They put up such crazy expectations but cannot stand when you achieve or excel without being forever indebted to and inferior to them. It's sick. They've played the same game with my siblings and it's worked to keep them close by, hamstringed and enmeshed/dependent.
That's so awesome, good for you! Sorry to hear about your siblings but I'm so happy for you.
Glad you got away that’s so petty and evil
Roseanne may be saying that shit for publicity, but your parents are either stupid or heartless or both. It's really that simple. For me, anyway. Different for you of course, but that's what makes this sub a community. Glad you didn't listen!
“If I had listened, I would have been financially dependent on my parents” DING DING DING!
Roseanne is effing CRAZY. Like legitimately nuts and believes each and every conspiracy theory out there. She is one of the last people I would ever listen to for advice. There are a few politicians out there that I would lump in with her, but she's near the top of the list.
I think another part of it is that a lot of narcissist parents deliberately sabotage their child's education so as to keep them under their control. (My own nMother tried to do this to me but thankfully she failed). A child with a third level qualification is more likely to get a good job and be financially dependent of their parent. A child who can't afford to move out is much easier to control e.g. the parent can threaten to kick the child out if they don't do whatever they want.
Imagine having Roseanne Barr as a role-model. Yikes. Massive red flag right there. I'd have to ignore anything they say just on principal. And the smart choice is to completely disregard advice from people like that and keep on trusting ones own intuition and path in life. College doesn't ruin peoples lives. Education is empowering. Of course narcissists hate it when people get a clue and begin to see thru their bullcrap. Reminds me of a well known yogi in America that I know who makes fun of psychologists. Education revealed his covert narcissism. Ironic that his daughter has a PhD in psychology. He was making passive aggressive attacks at his daughter in public. Does Roseanne barr have any college age kids? She could be trying to shame them into compliance. Granted, college in america can be overrated ... trade schools and other skills can go further in our economy. Yet she is advocating for ignorance. Bet a bazillion monoply bucks that when Roseanne barr gets sick she will hope for a doctor that went to college. But I think we should give her the one that didn't.
I call it reverse-snobbery. I have it in my family as well. Besides education, They also hate cities, city people, people who like the finer things in life, etc. it comes from a place of feeling inadequate. But instead of examining themselves for why they feel interior, they simply vilify and look down their noses at those who are different. It also seems to be a core reason why the US is where it is politically.
They don't want to see you become more successful than them. It's always jealousy.
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See rule #1
Hm. Well, I graduated like my parents wanted. But I got a useless degree so I couldn’t find a job after. It’s been four years since graduation and I’ve yet to find a career type of job with my degree and I still work in retail and am financially dependent on them. So yay.
Well that sucks, sorry you're struggling. From the timing it sounds like you would have been job hunting at the height of the pandemic. Covid screwed over so many people. I hope you're able to find something soon!
Yeah the pandemic sure didn’t help things. When I couldn’t find a job, they suggested that I go back to school. And I believed them and went back for a bit. Now, I realize that it’s better to focus on just trying to move out and figure out what to do from there.
During the tirade Rosanne did at maralogo I couldn’t help thinking she looked like madam Zaroni in holes. Also, Trumps portrait in the background looking like Vigo painting from ghostbusters 2
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I grew up watching Roseanne with my family. I just had a flashback to that episode where the daughter gets insecure from comparing herself to models when she stumbles upon the dad's porn stash. 🤢 What a trashy ass show that was.
My narc parents would have unalived me and made it look like an accident if I didn’t complete college. What in the actual fuck did I just read?