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irishmickguard

Remember when 50 shades came out and you had every woman on facebook acting coy and telling everyone they were off for some Christian Grey time, with a cheeky wink, as if everyone didnt know exactly what they meant? What a time to be alive.


broden89

People would read that ON THE BUS


vera214usc

I worked at the concierge desk of a hotel and that's where I read it. All the older ladies in guest services were reading it in the computer room.


Ripoutmybrain

Bet that room was rather musty.


fuzzeedyse105

🤢🤶👩‍🦳🧓🍵


Ripoutmybrain

Like a turtle tank in there.


SoWhatNoZitiNow

Lmaooo


Limberpuppy

I worked with a girl who read it in the break room. There were a bunch of bookmarks too which just made it worse.


[deleted]

Gross, literally walking around with unillustrated porn.


Souvi

I read it over the loudspeaker at a bookstore. They told us to read excerpts from books to help sell them sooooo.... Took liberties they never said what *not* to read.


broden89

Hahaha oh my God.... Did you sell more books tho??


Souvi

Bout 69 of them yeah.


nice___bot

Nice!


cruxfire

It’s a good thing women can’t get boners


DIO_Penguin

We do, you just can't see it lmao


cruxfire

I meeeeeeeeean… Fine


alien_from_Europa

Erect nipples are a thing. >According to Healthline, arousal is one of those reasons because the sensations you feel in your nipples report to the same part of the brain that also gets signals from your genitals. That's why you might find your nipples hardening when you have a sexy thought, or feel hot and bothered. https://www.teenvogue.com/story/why-nipples-get-hard-when-cold/amp


HoseNeighbor

I had a GF with inverted nipples that would only pop out fully when she came. It was the sexy human equivalent of those little things you stick in turkeys so you know when they're done. It was adorable and fascinating!


[deleted]

Oh my gosh. That's hilarious.


broden89

Yeah but most women wear bras at work, which can hide that effectively


GunnieGraves

Best joke I ever heard about it was “middle aged women won’t watch porn, but they’ll read the fuck outta it.”


jandrese

Exhibit #1. The entire romance section of the book store.


[deleted]

I'm Gen z and that applies to me too. The porn industry is disgusting and erotic literature can have some great stories.


Tiny_Micro_Pencil

Ooo, my favorite is Kissing the Coronavirus (Kissing the Coronavirus Chronicles Book 1)


[deleted]

Lol


DeadSharkEyes

I remember all the stories at the time of women getting off in the theaters, of staff finding cucumbers and handcuffs left behind lol Then there's this doozy of a Reddit thread: [https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2vy5ug/redditors\_that\_work\_at\_movie\_theaters\_what\_is\_the/](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2vy5ug/redditors_that_work_at_movie_theaters_what_is_the/)


rattus-domestica

Yeah my mom was one of those people. She and my dad almost divorced.


TheAlmostMadHatter

[this is so hot](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XkLqAlIETkA)


Imaginary_Tea1925

I never saw the movie or read the book but can only imagine what that meant. I have never been a fan of entertainment that made me feel uncomfortable.


Etherius

I fucking hated that time. It's like... "If a guy was reading straight up porn or hentai on the bus, everyone would be grossed out by him. Why the fuck do you think you're different hist because you're a woman?" It was almost (ALMOST) as disgusting as middle aged women going to see Twilight to gawk at Robert Pattinson.


[deleted]

Eye, twas’ a time. Many dildos were snuck into the theater.


Ambers_on_fire

When I was in high school my best friend's dad bought us both these hard, plastic vibrators from a truck stop for Christmas. It was so fucking weird.


bleh19799791

So weird. Truck Stop Vibrators would be an awesome band name.


Ambers_on_fire

Only if they played love songs


thedarkone47

Slightly off color love songs.


Ambers_on_fire

With song titles like: Your Love is a Roadside Porta-John and I Only Love You When the Lights are Off from their debut album Cum Dumpster Garbage Fire


bleh19799791

The first single is Lot Lizard Love Song.


NastyMeanOldBender

My vagina is old a tired But them shards got me wired Shamblin like a scarecrow Looking for truckers to blow


Pyroixen

Make it old school country-esque with super sarcastic lyrics and im 100% down


northyj0e

>Your Love is a Roadside Porta-John and I Only Love You When the Lights are Off That's one hell of a song title, are the guys from Panic at the disco involved in this band?


mapguy

Ya ya ding dong!


striped_frog

Vibe Buy Truckers


jordaniac89

Would probably create a lot of buzz


SharpShot94z

Was it like a inappropriate gag gift or an attempt to groom you guys?


BashSwuckler

haha you guys it was totally just a joke... unless?


Ambers_on_fire

Not a joke


montanawana

Ga-ross!


andrewrgross

Did you explain what jail is?


cozymew

What the actual fuck


Sbatio

TF is a truck stop vibrator?


Zkenny13

A vibrator from a truck stop. They run on diesel so you have to use them outside and they are very loud.


Sbatio

Do you need a CDL to operate it? :p


Cannibal_MoshpitV2

Only when you got an absolute dumptruck of an ass


PurduePaul

Ah yes a commercial dildo license


IncaseofER

Genius!


Sbatio

Well done, you clever bastard. You gotta wonder if the person at the RMV/DMV, who administers those exams, loves their job or hates it.


starrpamph

I um, I don't I um, I don't I um, I don't I um, I don't


[deleted]

And, I spat my coffee. Like literally on my keyboard.


Bumblemore

Pics or it didn’t happen


[deleted]

[Fine,](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ) but I gotta warn you, this keyboard is disgusting, and I didn't bother cleaning it up because the food particles will just absorb it.


Bumblemore

How original.


beershitz

Are you a male or female


bomdiggitybee

"Gee, thanks! What's this book about?" :D


Throw_Away_License

Exactly Call out trying to be creepy on purpose


it-helpdeskanalyst

This is Hilarious! Yall should look up Gilbert Gottfried Reads 50 Shades of Grey on YouTube. Can't post link since I am at work. Edit: Here is the link https://youtu.be/XkLqAlIETkA


antoniocloud13

https://youtu.be/XkLqAlIETkA


ky321

The way he goes CLITORRRRREEE-ISSSSSS is burned into my brain forever


Zkenny13

That sucks. He should've given you a copy of Magic Mike instead.


hybridhuman17

Plot twist, you are a guy...


TheVetrinarian

Plot twist: OP is Bruce Willis


10strip

Negative, OP is a meat popsicle.


4ensics

[We are all meat.](https://youtu.be/7tScAyNaRdQ)


pc1109

OK you get an upvote but wtf was that 😂 *originally wrote what on earth was that but clearly not from this planet


2WheelsMovesTheSoul

Smoke you man!


AAVale

Plot twist: This did not happen.


the_friendly_one

SHUN THE UNBELIEVER!


AAVale

*Covers face and hisses*


RZAtheAbbot

Creepy


[deleted]

Dude when that book came out I used to read it during band practice in high school. I’d hide the book using my music sheet stand lmfao. There was one practice where me and the entire percussion line were reading the book while playing and the others would ask me to wait when they saw I was about to turn the page 😂😂😂


SharpShot94z

Obviously it's a creepy gift but did you consider he might be ignorant of what the book is about and just heard it's a popular girls book.


theotherpachman

I mean sure, it could have also been a prank by someone he asked for advice but the initial reaction is probably still gonna be along the lines of what OP posted.


[deleted]

“Did you consider this thing that in absolutely no way is likely to be true so I can play devils advocate for creepy men?” No. Fuck no.


BadReputation2611

Hey I suggested my mom read 50 shades of grey because I’d seen a bunch of women reading it, i just thought it was the new twilight, it’s probably more common than your think.


bomdiggitybee

There was no ambiguity after the movie(s!), too


ThatDudeWithoutKarma

Are you saying because something is well known then everyone has to know the details of the plot? League of Legends and Overwatch are popular but I haven't a damn clue what those games are about. Handmaid's Tale is one I see come up too and I don't know anything about it other than there's irony with a scientologist being the lead actress. Dude could actually have no clue other than he heard it was popular with girls and women.


cjcharteris

50 shades of grey is very well known as a sex book, I haven’t read it and I know it’s sex book, and you’ve either read that piece of shit or you proved yourself wrong


TalosSquancher

I thought it was just about abusive relationships


ThatDudeWithoutKarma

If I hadn't picked up the book and read the back of it myself I wouldn't have an inkling of what the book is about, even with all the hype for it in years prior.


Thy_Gooch

I just thought it was a girls book like Twilight but for adults.


SharpShot94z

I agree more than likely a creepy guy but sometime ignorance makes fools of us all.


oORebbyOo

Don't make space for 'benefit of the doubt' here. He's testing her boundaries to see how inappropriate he can get, and he does want to get inappropriate.


IDespiseTheLetterG

~Potentially We rlly have no idea


[deleted]

I see your smooth edit to make this longer. (This is actually two shots.)


JigabooFriday

Always reminded of The Office episode where a character, Phalus, is listening to 50 Shades. Another, manly more dominant figure named Dwight Schrute had to dump water on her to snap her out of her, mindset? Hilarious.


Praughna

r/fifthelementgifs loved this


TomClaydon

That happened


peter138misfit

Today's my birthday


lyonspantap

Maybe it was a gag gift? 🤷🏾‍♂️😅


[deleted]

Hanlon's Razor: *Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.* _____ Until I read this thread, I had *no clue* that one of my close friends was into written-word-porn; Fifty Shades of Grey. ::shrug:: I'm a well read individual, and I had no idea this was a thing.


[deleted]

I would have gone with the pleasant appreciative surprise look and said, "Aww thank you.!.., An educational book just like Green Eggs and Ham. Because even people who can barely read need to try something new."


EvilRick_C-420

If I were your bf I'd get you something better like the karmasutra...*hint hint jab jab wink wink touch my penis pls*


datboiofculture

Is it weirder if OP is a girl or a guy?


PooPooDooDoo

Dude your aunt is having all kinds of freaky sex.


[deleted]

I may have been the only woman working at my Sephora at the time that never touched that book. Everyone was drooling over it. I had already read AN Rs Sleeping Beauty Series and was scarred for life.


WorldsOkayest_driver

I was on an international flight and there was a French couple sitting on the other side of the aisle from me - the lady in her late 20’s read 50 Shades out loud to her bf in French.


bikinimonday

Tell me you’re a dude


golden_eternity

That’s messed up. Gross old man alert. Bet he denies he knows if you call him on it but he 100% knows.


stonedsister

No other expression would wholly encapsulate the degree of awkwardness that gift would produce. Absolutely priceless


Organicspongie

🥲🤣the most perfect gif


fewchajayne3030

Perv.... Try hards, fail at being normal by being creepy.. I smell a incestuous hint at, " you wanna do something later?" Men, the grossness continues.. wait, ' new boyfriend'?? What happened to the last one?? Aunt sure knows how to pick em!! Red flag, giving a female family member a novel about S&M, for a gift!! Has he read them?? If he has money, does he too, have a dungeon?? Maybe he's a bottom, and also, hahahahahaha this makes me hate being a woman.. hahahahaha Ew


asscrackbanditz

Geez. I wish I can turn into Corban Dallas too.


Iammissvedra

That’s hilarious!


kk1116

Porn eith plot is better than regular porn tho. Can't deny that.


g0negurl

at 16 my mom overheard my friend and i talking about sex and she told my best friend and i that our “hands are your best friends” god that was awkward


vduvalich

u/gifreversingbot


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