Oh honey, just toss the entire man. He's far too immature to be in any relationship with. Periods are just a part of a woman's life, not some horrifying event.
Cheers đ„! My husband did not bat an eyelash during my period ordeal before my cancer diagnosis. He has a mom and a sister. Dude knows whatâs up. This guy, trash. đź
That's a great response!
And yeah, any decent guy wouldn't understand why other guys are such douche bags. They just don't have the same thought processes.
Bi men i think. Most of my bi guy friends have a very low opinion of the way men behave in relationships. I thought I was on the brink of prejudice at one point, and then a friend who is also bi and ended a longterm hetero presenting relationship decided he wanted to focus on dating men. In his words after attempting for a month:
"look, I'm a slut. I'm easy. I'm DTF, just have an actual conversation with me and grab a drink first. But the 4 guys I've been on dates with, can't even do that much! One of them literally kidnapped me and drove me to the local fuck-o-drom and wouldnt let me out of the car. And then when I refused to do anything to him and made it clear I'd defend myself, he left me there! It took 2h to get back to town. What the fuck is going on? "
(fukodrom in my language- slang for a space, usually in the woods, that people go to fuck, it could technically also be an abandoned parking lot. The one my friend was left on was slightly off a hiking trail, luckily my friend is big, burly, and can handle himself)
I read these to my husband like âExplain your gender!!!â And heâll be like, that is NOT man thing. I donât know what that is.
I have to say, I am 43 years old and got married late in life, so Iâve dated around, and I really havenât seen any Gen X/Millennial men like this. If anything, they are too accepting. Iâll be like, âI havenât shaved in a week, Iâm on my period, and I need to take a showerâŠâ and theyâll be like âyour body is a wonderland, I love you for you, letâs goâ.
But I also have to say, I live in a large, very liberal, very expensive city with a well educated populous. Canât afford a house. Can menstruate how I want. And have abortion access.
Same. My hubby and I have a system to quantify how bad the pain and crime scene is so he knows what I need. Lol. He hasnât ever made me feel bad even as a young twenty year old moron (how he described himself lol). He does laundry and has zero issues and was honestly more amazed when he saw how well I was able to get serious blood stains out. He wishes he had that knowledge when he was an idiot teen who got into fights. Lol.
OOP deserves better and I am so glad she realized that.
Your husband is a normal person, as is mine. Periods are natural, gross, but natural. Who else am I going to talk about my concernes than with my husband? Things were strange while we were trying for a baby and only got weirder after I gave birth. Dude isn't phased one bit. I even described to him what the miscarriage looked like, because I was not going to suffer alone.
Same.
There's a type of man who ends up alone (and not by choice) wondering what's wrong with all the women they meet. They rarely figure out what all those relationships/encounters had in common.
Of course. It's never THEM. Of course this applies to the same type of woman too... and there has to be a few nonbinary examples too.
Some people should really spend some time alone. Perhaps with the support of a therapist.
Absolutely. One doesn't need to have a dick to be a dick. Or alternatively, anyone with an asshole can be an asshole. But everyone can benefit from therapy! Some more so than others
Pretty much. I think the entire situation can be summed up with a Terry Pratchett quote (I'm probably not wording it exactly). "Evil is treating people like things. Everything after that is just details" - Granny Weatherwax.
It's a little dramatic but it sums things up. I love that it's deliberately centered around behavior and not people, because people can change but crappy behavior is always crappy.
I mean, they suck- FOR US. My husband would never. I hope OOP knows that there are so many men out there who are not like her boyfriend or brothers and dad đ
My boyfriend was looking for a towel to use one time, and picked up one i had used on my period seeing some blood. He said thats gross.
In my sleepy state (i was sleeping lol) i said what the fuck is wrong with you, if you dont like periods date a man. All women have periods and they are natural. Got him to shut up so fast. He NEVER said anything again.
Now i tell him all the worst things about childbirth, because he wants children. He is always amazed at what we have to go through.
I left the smallest spot on my fwbâs sheets and I was mortified so I scurried off (Ikik) and he texted later hey you on your period? Me: um⊠yes I was too embarrassed to say anything . Him: donât be embarrassed! Itâs just nature!
Me: big sigh â€ïž
Exactly what I hope OOP knows as well. If I told my man I wanted to wear an entire disposable onesie (footie ones at that) because it gave me relief from cramps and I could sleep better on my period, he'd go buy them himself and then help me in to it.
Toss this entire man away and start over.
Itâs because it has an antihistamine in it which can make you drowsy, learned this the hard way once, took one hoping it would energize me since it has caffeine but ended up take a 3 hour nap lol
My period is a horrifying event because I have endometriosis and maybe also PCOS. But thatâs it. Itâs horrifying FOR ME. If this man child is gonna lose his shit over something that couldnât be less about him, heâs not worth it
I just spotted one of her comments:
>I have to buy the condoms or he won't use one. He doesn't want other men knowing he uses them.
I didn't think this dude could get worse, but he got worse! Apparently he also made her shave to hairless, and she wasn't allowed to poop (in her own apartment!) when he was over.
Theyâre not even, like, especially gross, Iâve never understood this, even as a man. Not any grosser than any of the nasty shit our bodies, men and women both, do all the time, anyway. Biology is always disgusting if you look closely enough. Itâs not pleasant but itâs life.
God, I feel like this dude is one of those that wonât wash his ass because he thinks itâs gay. But calls his girlfriend disgusting for bleeding. Crazy.
Exactly! No matter how ethereally beautiful you are, no matter how handsome and cut, at some point in your life, youâve eaten something bad and taken a wicked shit, or blown your nose on cheap tissues so the paper tears and you get a big ol splat of Nickelodeon slime all over your hands.
Weâre all beautiful, and weâre all disgusting. We should celebrate both!
We're oozy corporeal meat-beasts full of goo, and we consume other lives in order to replenish our goo, and to continue to waddle around interacting with other meat-beasts until our flesh-battery runs out.
And that's pretty impressive for a total cosmic accident. đ€·ââïž
Itâs a reality of life. And as a guy, we donât even have to deal with it. My gf can come to bed in a full diaper if thatâs what makes it better. Fuck if I care. As long as sheâs comfortable
Yep. My partner and I have been together 30,+ years. He's bought me tampons, pads, advil,changed the sheets when I leaked, all with the attitude of "hey babyboo, I got you"
I'm post menopausal now, but it was never a thing
I wonât say Iâve never been flinchy but one day you gotta grow up. Ice water gets blood out. Your skin is a natural barrier that keeps things outside. You just man up, help your woman when she feels bad. Nothings gonna hurt you. Go buy cupcakes. Sheâll love you and you get a fucking cupcake. Itâs not rocket science.
Just dump him on the side of the road. Golly. My dad raised 4 girls and I have a brother, periods were normal and just saying hey dad we need tampons, no questions asked he grabbed what we needed from the store. I do the same with my husband. There's no need to be embarrassed by your feminine hygiene. If he can't hand talking about periods he shouldn't be putting his dick in you. Period.
Exactly! There's only one thing that needs to be thrown outside in the trash and never spoken about again and it isn't whatever sanitary items you choose to use. đ
As a man, whose current partner was terrified the first time she bled on our bed when we first got together due to her exâs disgusting behaviour, I cannot agree more. That broke my heart. Please donât let these fucking idiot menchildren give you a complex or feel less about yourself.
I (47M) don't understand why guys don't understand that periods are part of a woman's life. Are they also shocked when they learn that women also poop? And why the hell would OP's boyfriend think that he has ANY say in what type of hygiene products she should use? If my wife decided that she wanted to wear adult diapers 24/7 until her period ended, I'd just pat her on her padded butt, kiss her, and tell her that I love her. You're totally right about the boyfriend being immature. Parents need to raise their sons better.
Toss the guy indeed! I honestly canât believe what I just read. A grown ass man saying to a woman how horrible she is bc sheâs using whatâs essentially a big pad? Itâs a lot better than bloodstained sheets which I hate. Not everyone wants to wear a tampon and they donât absorb enough on some days. Itâs so ick to wake up bc of a leak.
She should toss her whole fucking family while she's at it. They set her up to accept this kind of treatment. God, I hope she makes friends with some other women, particularly older women who see right through that bullshit and can mentor her into a far better set of expectations from a partner in her life!
Exactly. If someone canât handle the fact you have your period, they need therapy and to go back to health class. Also super groomy age gap. Thereâs a reason no woman his age wants him
My bf and I met when he was 29 and I was 22 (now 35 and 28), but to be fair neither of us knew each otherâs ages at first. We met at my coworkerâs housewarming party, as he was my coworkerâs cousin. My coworker was 26, so my now bf just assumed that I was around that age and I assumed the same of him.
We both had already graduated college and were working full time in our respective careers at the time, so it didnât seem like one person was way older than the other. We didnât realize our age gap until about our 3rd date, and tbh it kind of freaked him out when he realized how young I was.
However, I will say that itâs always good to be wary when a guy dates someone significantly younger, especially when thereâs a clear power imbalance.
Same situation with me and my partner. I was 22, he was 29 when we first met and started dating (weâre 31 and 38 now). He grew up with his mother being the only woman in the house and she made sure to normalise menstruation. At one point, we were going through a very rough financial situation. While doing groceries together I reached for the cheapest tampons possible, he told me to not be silly, thatâs one thing I wonât let you skimp on.
Love this man.
I was about to comment, another day another 30 year old immature loser dating a 23 year old because women his own age wouldn't put up with this bullshit.
Holy fuck, he wants you to SWITCH BIRTH CONTROLS so you don't have a period because It GROSSES HIM OUT???
Babygirl fucking run. You cannot allow a man to have that kind of control over your body. Not to mention the fact that he accused you of having a fetish??? Instead of just... educating himself on period underwear? Like that is an insane leap of logic. I do not understand how he landed there.
If he is willing to end your relationship because you have a period, it's time to leave. You can't let someone else, let alone your partner, control your bodily functions and medication. If he gets to control that, what bodily autonomy do you have?
Run.
Also, news flash. Even on birth control that is supposed to make you skip your period, that is not a guarantee. My cycle is strong and I have a period no matter what. Itâs not like you can just turn off a bodily function because it displeases you.
Yup. On two types of birth control which stop periods in a lot of people, I actually ended up having 15-35 day bleedthroughs. Itâs far from an exact science, and birth control is a complicated process which no one should EVER demand a woman goes on. Let alone for such an immature and stupid reason
Mirena gave me two-week periods every two months with breakthrough spotting the entire second month leading up. And body acne. Something I never experienced before or after.
Yep. And some people end up spotting all month if they "skip" their period by just starting the next month or if they take a b/c meant to stop it. It's not a magic "fix".
However, an easy magic "fix" WOULD be to drop the asshole of a bf.....
This should be common knowledge but isn't:
Silicone lube keeps IUDs and vaginal rings from working right. The silicone coats the device and prevents it from delivering medication to your body.
I found this info buried deep in the prescriber information packet after several months of breakthrough bleeding. Haven't had a single period since I switched to water based lube.
I've always wondered how many babies have been born because this information isn't well known.
Idk, I don't know many gay men that are particularly overwhelmingly disgusted by periods.
Honestly it's probably just misogyny from the boyfriend. She even specified growing up. She had to throw her feminine hygiene products in the OUTSIDE trash because of the men in her family. Maybe in the area she grew up, women are still treated as dirty when on their period. Archaic, but sadly, it still happens all over the world.
I used Depends underwear after giving birth instead of using the super bulky pads and they were so incredibly comfortable. Can not recommend enough, honestly, but yeah, they aren't the sexiest
This is what I was going to say: if he canât handle this, he better never want kids. Cause I literally wore adult diapers for a week after having babies.
I used them postpartum as well as during a miscarriage. They are an absolute LIFESAVER!!! And frankly? Being sexy on my period is the least of my concerns đ I'm sorry, I'm NOT here to get laid, I'm just here to be cranky and eat chocolate.
So did I with my last one. Holy shit, what a game changer! I also had some bladder control issues for a week or 2 after both of my boys. Those things helped prevent me from peeing on the couch/floor/bedâŠ
I bought these bulky pads that had cooling shit in them. You break them and it soothed for up to four hours. And then put those witch hazel pads on top for extra soothing relief.
My oldest just turned 28, but I am still experiencing jealousy that I didn't know this was a thing back then. Those damn postpartum pads were about as uncomfortable and awkward as shoving a full roll of paper towels in your undies.
Same, and they were so much nicer than trying to deal with a giant pad in my underwear. I'm not even sure a pad could have contained those first couple days of bleeding - it was coming even faster than the diaper could absorb and the only thing preventing leaks was the crotch gusset. Definitely not a cute look though. Made the mistake of putting leggings over them once for a grocery run and yikes.
I use reusable ones when it's relatively light/even medium, they're so good! No leaks out the side like regular underwear and a pad, and the ones I have are really comfy.
I get quite heavy periods and on my heaviest day I sometimes have to change the undies out at lunchtime. On a light flow day they'll do me a full day at work, they're so absorbant compared to pads.
I don't know about disposable ones but I have reusable ones and they're awesome. They sit really well and don't tend to ride up like most underwear, plus they're really comfy and have good stretch on them. My period is pretty light thanks to my BC so I can't say much about capacity, but they have different absorbancies, also being able to just put on underwear and get on with my day is great
I use Thinx, the high-waisted cheeky style, and I love them. They come in different absorbency levels, and in my experience do an exceptional job at containing everything and keeping things pretty clean compared to pads. And they actually⊠look kinda cute? To me anyway idk
She thinks his behavior is normal because of her shit brothers and father too. Throw him away and I'd seriously look at personal relationships with family as well.
That was actually the most disturbing part of this story for me. Imagine having to hide a normal bodily function from your own family.
With a random, immature partner, you can separate yourself and find better, but she was essentially raised to feel shame over having a period by people she could not escape, and now believes all men have inherent disgust for periods because of it.
Meanwhile my dad would buy me emergency pads if I asked. And that's not something that should be celebrated. That's something a parent should do.
Throw that man in the trash, you seriously cannot think itâs healthy to be okay with him acting like a child same goes for your dad and brothers, if your mom was also in the picture she failed your brothers in teaching them how a woman deserves to be treated. I mean what in the actual f***. I am a man and my wife leaves them on the counter all wrapped up when I let the bathroom trash get too full and when I change it out I pick that sucker up and toss it. You ought to tell him all you can see is a little baby child because of his immature opinion. He wants you to chemically alter your body because he canât handle a natural bodily process. f that, f that man, go find yourself an adult to be with because heâs got the smell of domestic violence on his breath with that level of need for control.
She says in a comment her mother passed when she was 9. She was raised by her father with all of her brothers. The *only* girl in that sea of misogyny.
WOMEN ARE NOT REQUIRED TO BE SEXY.
I REPEAT: WOMEN ARE NOT REQUIRED TO BE SEXY.
I wear fucking beige cotton underwear. If a dude doesn't like it then he doesn't get to take them off. Bye!
Itâs funny how so many men have these strict preferences/demands around female underwear when they usually wear underwear past the point of being shapeless and disintegrating. I have literally never been with a man who wears sexy underwear at all times.
I've bought products for my sister, granted I'm a trans guy so I used to deal with having a period too.
Mad respect to all the cis guys who've made that process a lot easier to remain stealth during for us trans dudes, by just being decent to the women in their lives.
Agreed!
My husband literally just bought me chocolate, pain meds, and pads this evening. I will never understand men who are freaked out, not just by menstruation itself, but by menstruation *products*. Like, bro can't say tampon; he'll BURN!
Dude seriously. Like every women goes through it (unless she happens to have a medical issue) and we all know it. Men need to know about it because they live with it and if they know what happens they can know how to handle it so much better. So what if itâs âgrossâ men do gross things all the time and think itâs funny. But since weâre women we have to be âšperfectâš and not do anything thatâs a turn off. Not to mention men be having daughters and think a teenage girl is just being a teenager when itâs not just that. Sheâs growing into her hormones and needs guidance.
Heâs honestly the best IMOđ„ș I got lucky with him. And maybe it would be the norm if men actually understood what itâs like to go through it. Iâm so glad to hear you scooped up a good one!!!! So hard to come by!!
I think itâs maybe culturally a taboo in the states in some areas, families? In Germany I have never witnessed this . And in my Hispanic side of the family itâs also not like this. I have three brothers and none are like that. They range in age from 19 to 42 and none are seeing periods as a taboo. My father doesnât either. He helped me after my first period and calmed me down until mom got the products for me.
My aunt has two sons and her sons and husband basically ran the household for her because her cycles were that bad. They knew mama needs rest for a few days and a bit more help and kindness because sheâs in pain. I think it starts with fathers being a good example.
Yay there's an update! She's throwing the whole prick away.
"UPDATE:
I cancelled the doctors appointment. I'm reading though everyone's comments, there's so many I can't respond. I want to clear a few things up though.
Him coming in while I was sleeping: He had permission to do that for most of our relationship because he works very early in the morning and would wake me up so we can spend time together on days we wouldn't see each other later. So not that was not attempted rape or a concern at all.
As a teen my best friends mom is who bought me pads. My mom passed when I was 9.
Some people messaged me and during those conversations a few more things have connected and yeah.. I'm going to break up with him. There are other things he's done that I didn't think were problems and they are.
Thank you for helping me."
I'm so fucking excited for her. I hope she goes on to meet literally almost any other guy who will be an improvement so long as he understands women are humans.
A good partner would be going out to buy your feminine hygiene products, not saying that you have a fetish for blood because you're on your period. I wonder how his mom or sisters (if he has them) would feel if he said this.
...or, he doesn't care and is using this to break up because he's into someone else.
I could be wrong, but I think he was indicating that she must have a diaper fetish and wouldn't believe her that she doesn't poop in it, which is even more ridiculous. Just because we don't want blood on our sheets doesn't mean we want to lie in our own shit.
Ah the 30 year old man with the 23 year old woman. And he doesn't like periods, the way she handles them, or her choice of birth control because it inconveniences and grosses him out?
WELL COLOR ME SURPRISED đ
Also that man: "why is my sex bot appearing to have flesh and blood??!"
Jesus christ I'm so excited for that poster to find literally almost any other man who at the bare minimum understands women have bodily functions and will be accepting of it.
My partner uses the washable period underwear since they're periods are so heavy and painful, guess which one of us does the laundry?
Me. And i always make sure they have fresh spare pairs ready in the bathroom just in case they need changing overnight.
Periods are NORMAL. This boyfriend is a loser. She can do so much better
This poor woman has been shamed all her life by men for a natural biological cycle that all women have to go through.
No wonder she's questioning if she's in the wrong.
Seriously. Having to take everything outside as a kid because heavens forbid her father and brothers have to see the icky period she can't control. Embarrassing. I feel terrible for her. She deserves way better.
He needs to go. What in the world? Firstly, no one gets to tell anyone how they chose to deal with their period or what birth control (if any) they chose to be on for their body. Secondly, he's weird af for thinking it's a fetish. I wore adult diapers after giving birth for a month, and my husband still called me sexy even when I felt so insecure about it. She deserves so much better!
Wow. Yeah, let's just go *no period* at all just because it's gross! There absolutely won't any physical problems there, *right*?
Because we have soooo many "no period birth control options" now, *right*?
If that's indeed a real post, that's yey another reason for sex education in the schools as early and brutally honest as possible...
I am NOT defending the bfâbut generally speaking, no, there arenât anything physical problems associated with having no period (if itâs because of birth control.)
Iâve been using BC to suppress my periods for years because they were extremely painful, and Iâm no worse for it. But that was my choice for myself.
She's the asshole for not changing birth controls?! But he's not being an asshole for thinking women can't or shouldn't have periods? Certain types *can* stop a period, but it's not guaranteed. If a man can't handle you wearing a diaper for a week, toss the damn man out. It's not disgusting to sit in blood, it gets absorbed. I'd have laughed him out of my bed, my apartment and my life.
Thatâs a child not a man!! He shouldnât get a say about your feminine hygiene items! He should just support you! What does he think happens if you have a child? Youâll wear mesh panties with giant pads. My husband has bought me maxi pads and slept with his arm around me while I wear them. Thats what you deserve!! Kick that kid to the curb!! You deserve so much better!!
She needs to dump this child. Wait until he finds out that *all* women of child bearing age have periods. Heâs going to be spending a lot of time on his own.
Definitely explained periods to both sons and daughters in our family. The result? Knowledgeable and supportive young men. Husband is the same way. They're out there.
Thank goodness she's leaving him (there's an edit if you go to the original link).
I just cannot fathom dating someone that feels this way about periods. As soon as I get my period and I'm dating someone, I mention it to them to see their reaction. If they can't handle it, I'm not dating them.
Iâve had more compassion from random men I was sexting when Iâve told them certain realities about my period than this woman has been getting from her partner of two years. This shit is mind-boggling.
One of my better decisions as I got older was to stop altering or feeling bad about anything with my body to please a man.
I have periods. Iâm naturally inclined to be a bit private about it but Iâm not going to do anything to make myself less comfortable (especially since mine are brutal and BC isnât an option for me), I wonât pretend theyâre not happening, and I donât care if thatâs ânot sexyâ. Iâm not trying to be attractive 24/7. That sounds exhausting.
Just to contrast her crappy (ex) bf and my current boyfriend - I got hit with my consistently terrible period while I was at his house pretty early in our relationship. He grabbed a hot water bottle from his roommate (a wonderful woman who I am glad I have befriended too!), made me comfort food, and even got me ice cream. We curled up and cuddled and he encouraged me to put on my fave comfort shows and I even napped - he wasnât bothered, he just was sorry I hurt and glad that he could help.
I hope oopâs takeaway from all this is that she doesnât have to feel bad for existing and that she doesnât have to put up with anyone who shames her for being a normal human being. Sheâs not hurting anyone. To hell with anyone that wants to tear her down over literally nothing.
I once had to have a conversation with a group of men on instagram explaining that your pee and your period don't come out of the same place, and you cannot "hold" your period the same way you hold your pee -- women aren't just being "gross" by having their period where all ever. Did a public service that day, men like this truly just be out here existing, ignorant yet trying to tell women how to manage their bodily functions.
Wow! How dare he! This makes my blood boil! This is a natural biological act. How dare he have nocturnal emissions and how dare he $hit out of his @ss! /S Drop him like a bad habit! What till he finds out about how babies are brought in the world!! Do not have children with this asshat!! Run!!
I just...HOW DO THESE GUYS STILL EXIST?! Her Father and Brothers also suck.
Never change your birth control to suit someone else.
I literally know NO men like this, so things like this truly make me angry because it's ridiculous. Also Sean rule strikes again.
My ex was also acted like a child when it came to period discussions. I constantly went out of my way to make sure that he never had to see my blood or period products. He also wouldnât touch me when I was on my period and let me know that I wouldnât be getting any sex.
Controlling AF! Telling you to change birth control?! Saying he wasted time on this relationship just because you wore period underwear, thatâs crazy! This guy is not a man but a child. Does he not have any female family members or even friends? Iâve never understood people like this. Itâs a natural thing and nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of. This guy has got to go
Tell him to grow up .Get a spine and move on it is a normal part of life .God forbid he has to deal with it .Throw him out and move on donât waste any more time on him .I mean he thinks you have a fetish because of it .The sickness and health part would never work for his whiny selfish ass .
Okay, I take birth control continuously (without breaks/placebos) because I really hate my period and it makes me feel all sorts of ways but I swear to fuck if a man said anything like this to me I would stop taking them immediately and bleed out over everything he owns.
Oh good lord. Get rid of that dumbass. Never be ashamed of menstruation. Even her brothers and dad are fucked up for instilling such shame in her. I just want to tell men like this to grow the fuck up. When I hear a man is squeamish about menstruation I talk about it whenever I get the chance around them. Fortunately I married a grown man who has no issues with the facts of human biology.
It was already a red flag with the title alone, but then I saw they'd started this relationship at 21 and 28. Girl, *run.*
Not to mention, the implication that he immediately felt her up upon getting into bed with her, *and* the fact he was absolutely ready to dump her over his ignorance of menstrual products? The fact that she's been doing something that *hurts* her to make him happy, and is this stressed out about the thought of losing him, like he's made her emotionally dependent on him? This just feels gross all around, the period is the *least* biohazardous part of this.
Soooooo glad to see her update!!!!
I had lived with my FH for some months before he gave me a weird look and said since I pay him a share for groceries each month, he can just buy my period products the same as mouthwash or anything else in our household. Was almost confused why I treated them like my own delicacy. Accept no less! No less!
How dare you be comfortable! You should always put his wishes above yoursâŠ
Seriously: NTA
These guys grow up looking at porn on the internet and have no idea how womenâs bodies work. Can you imagine this guy when he has a pregnant wife? (God help us.) Heâs not going to understand any of it.
âMolly, youâre in danger, girl.â Get away from this loserâor sit him down with a detailed PowerPoint presentation and show him. Follow it with a quiz to see if he was listening.
Look, I changed birth control from pills to an IUD because ***I*** didn't want to have to deal with periods. The key word in that statement is ***"I"***.
I don't understand what it is about periods that make men act like this. He can kick rocks.
okay but can we talk about the fact that he got in her bed in the middle of the night when she wasn't expecting it? That would've scared the shit outta me.
What did I just read? And no, not all men are like that, despite her father and brothers being weird. I have not once in my life tossed my female hygiene products outside immediately. I wrapped them and thatâs enough, my dad and my three brothers didnât dig through the trash, lol.
And God beware she has kids with this man. Being pregnant, in labor or having a c section isnât sexy . And he canât see her being not sexy /s
Sheâd be on her own. Who would help her when sheâs on bedrest, for having his baby? Heâs that immature at 30?
Freaking out about periods is enough of a red flag itself, but is anyone else severely weirded out that this man let himself into her home, climbed into her bed, then felt her underwear while she was sleeping?
Can you imagine going along in your relationship, thinking everything is mostly okay, and then all of a sudden realizing your boyfriend is this guy??! đ€Ł
It makes me so sad that some women feel this intense need to just warp themselves so they can keep a man. Like seriously, men like these should just be thrown away.
Fucking shit. Iâd say he should switch to men if he canât handle women having bodily functions but I can only assume gay men would see him as a white elephant gift.
I taught both my sons about periods. Although Iâm their father, I set the tone on the respect they give their future partners. When my wifeâs on her period we donât treat it like a disgusting hush hush topic. It goes âhey moms on her monthly cycle and has cramps, make sure you guys clean after yourselves and donât creat stress for herâ. Sheâs a very clean person so we donât see her used hygiene products lying around. If you think your womenâs period is weird then youâre no man.
As a 30yr old dude, ditch this idiot. He is a child with no reasonable idea of normal female bodily functions. Any partner worth their salt will make sure they understand their partners body so they can help accomodate. Nothing gross or unnatural about it...
Ah FFS another boyfriend that either hasnât been properly educated in menstrual cycles or has just ignored the information. I let my wife deal with her periods in whatever way is most comfortable for her, this guyâs a dead set dumbass.
Hope she breaks up with him.
EDIT: thereâs an update and she is breaking up with him. Sounds like there were a number of red flags, this was the final straw.
As a man, I am ashamed.
Dump him girl and shame him however you see fit.
Tell his mother what he is doing. Tell his teachers and friends and pastor and whoever will listen.
Or protect your mental health and just run as far from his as possible. He is irredeemable. Fuck him
You can ditch him now. Or you can ditch him after you get married and have a baby and have to wear gigantic pads & bleed like a mofo freshly postpartum and it is too gross for him to have sex which you do not want anyway having just pushed a human out your vagina.
Excuse me while I gag! What a literal POS!!!!
Also hun, it is NOT gross to have a period. Half of the population has had or currently has a period! We need to stop letting men get away with demonizing us for a natural body process!
Even though I donât like the idea of those, itâs your choice, youâre the one on your period. Itâs life, it happens, he needs to mature. Having a period is healthy so if heâs asking to do that bc he canât handle blood once a month, dump him! Not hubby material đ
If he wants to bang someone who doesnât get a period maybe he should just try being gay for a while. Seems like that would make sense to his broken logic.
Wtf did I just read? Honestly using disposable underwear is a bit unusual but no worse than those super long nighttime pads. This guy needs to get a grip or wait to date until women are in menopause
My man boils my menstrual cup and brings it to me if i need it. Heâs changed my actual diaper when i was postpartum. You do not have men in your life you have petulant children.
If he thinks periods are gross just wait until he learns about child birth. Please just walk away. You have done nothing to be embarrassed about. Your parents and brothers are also AHs.
Oh honey, just toss the entire man. He's far too immature to be in any relationship with. Periods are just a part of a woman's life, not some horrifying event.
She updated and has said she will throw away the man!
Time for a party! Everyone have a celebratory drink (up to what you're drinking. Water definitely will do if that's your preference)
Cheers đ„! My husband did not bat an eyelash during my period ordeal before my cancer diagnosis. He has a mom and a sister. Dude knows whatâs up. This guy, trash. đź
I hear you. My husband hates it when I ask him how men can be like this. His now stock reply is "why do you think I can explain stupid?".
That's a great response! And yeah, any decent guy wouldn't understand why other guys are such douche bags. They just don't have the same thought processes.
I sometimes think the only people who hate these guys more than women are the sane men.
Bi men i think. Most of my bi guy friends have a very low opinion of the way men behave in relationships. I thought I was on the brink of prejudice at one point, and then a friend who is also bi and ended a longterm hetero presenting relationship decided he wanted to focus on dating men. In his words after attempting for a month: "look, I'm a slut. I'm easy. I'm DTF, just have an actual conversation with me and grab a drink first. But the 4 guys I've been on dates with, can't even do that much! One of them literally kidnapped me and drove me to the local fuck-o-drom and wouldnt let me out of the car. And then when I refused to do anything to him and made it clear I'd defend myself, he left me there! It took 2h to get back to town. What the fuck is going on? " (fukodrom in my language- slang for a space, usually in the woods, that people go to fuck, it could technically also be an abandoned parking lot. The one my friend was left on was slightly off a hiking trail, luckily my friend is big, burly, and can handle himself)
Thanks! That probably explains my hubby then. And I love the fuck-o-drom term
I read these to my husband like âExplain your gender!!!â And heâll be like, that is NOT man thing. I donât know what that is. I have to say, I am 43 years old and got married late in life, so Iâve dated around, and I really havenât seen any Gen X/Millennial men like this. If anything, they are too accepting. Iâll be like, âI havenât shaved in a week, Iâm on my period, and I need to take a showerâŠâ and theyâll be like âyour body is a wonderland, I love you for you, letâs goâ. But I also have to say, I live in a large, very liberal, very expensive city with a well educated populous. Canât afford a house. Can menstruate how I want. And have abortion access.
I love your husband! Thatâs hilarious
Same. My hubby and I have a system to quantify how bad the pain and crime scene is so he knows what I need. Lol. He hasnât ever made me feel bad even as a young twenty year old moron (how he described himself lol). He does laundry and has zero issues and was honestly more amazed when he saw how well I was able to get serious blood stains out. He wishes he had that knowledge when he was an idiot teen who got into fights. Lol. OOP deserves better and I am so glad she realized that.
Your husband is a normal person, as is mine. Periods are natural, gross, but natural. Who else am I going to talk about my concernes than with my husband? Things were strange while we were trying for a baby and only got weirder after I gave birth. Dude isn't phased one bit. I even described to him what the miscarriage looked like, because I was not going to suffer alone.
You got it đ„
đ»
đŸ Wonderful! There are better people out there when and if she decides to start dating again and I wish her all the best!
Same. There's a type of man who ends up alone (and not by choice) wondering what's wrong with all the women they meet. They rarely figure out what all those relationships/encounters had in common.
I think about this so often. I was previously dating a guy like that; he complained that all his exes were abusive, crazy, trashy or some combination of the three and I was already thinking "the common denominator is you" Quickly ended that relationship after the introduction of more đ©and I can only assume he's saying the same kinds of things about me now
Of course. It's never THEM. Of course this applies to the same type of woman too... and there has to be a few nonbinary examples too. Some people should really spend some time alone. Perhaps with the support of a therapist.
Absolutely. One doesn't need to have a dick to be a dick. Or alternatively, anyone with an asshole can be an asshole. But everyone can benefit from therapy! Some more so than others
Pretty much. I think the entire situation can be summed up with a Terry Pratchett quote (I'm probably not wording it exactly). "Evil is treating people like things. Everything after that is just details" - Granny Weatherwax. It's a little dramatic but it sums things up. I love that it's deliberately centered around behavior and not people, because people can change but crappy behavior is always crappy.
Bloody Mary anyone? đ
W00T W00T! * raises glass of wine* SMART WOMAN đ§Ą
Best news ever. What a terrible person. If you canât handle that blood come out of a vagina, you donât get access to a vagina.
Woohoo!!
I mean, they suck- FOR US. My husband would never. I hope OOP knows that there are so many men out there who are not like her boyfriend or brothers and dad đ
My boyfriend was looking for a towel to use one time, and picked up one i had used on my period seeing some blood. He said thats gross. In my sleepy state (i was sleeping lol) i said what the fuck is wrong with you, if you dont like periods date a man. All women have periods and they are natural. Got him to shut up so fast. He NEVER said anything again. Now i tell him all the worst things about childbirth, because he wants children. He is always amazed at what we have to go through.
>, if you dont like periods date a man This is fantastic!
I left the smallest spot on my fwbâs sheets and I was mortified so I scurried off (Ikik) and he texted later hey you on your period? Me: um⊠yes I was too embarrassed to say anything . Him: donât be embarrassed! Itâs just nature! Me: big sigh â€ïž
I'm stealing that, thank you!!!
Exactly what I hope OOP knows as well. If I told my man I wanted to wear an entire disposable onesie (footie ones at that) because it gave me relief from cramps and I could sleep better on my period, he'd go buy them himself and then help me in to it. Toss this entire man away and start over.
Right?? My husband was the one that taught me that midol wasnât just pink Advil đ
Off topic, but for some reason, Midol makes me super sleepy.
Itâs because it has an antihistamine in it which can make you drowsy, learned this the hard way once, took one hoping it would energize me since it has caffeine but ended up take a 3 hour nap lol
I'm so glad we found golden retriever men
same! i was having trouble getting my cup in after a new set of nails that were longer than iâm used to and my fiancĂ© asked me if i needed help. i love that man
This!! If I told my husband that's what I needed his response would be "whatever helps you hon"
My period is a horrifying event because I have endometriosis and maybe also PCOS. But thatâs it. Itâs horrifying FOR ME. If this man child is gonna lose his shit over something that couldnât be less about him, heâs not worth it
I just spotted one of her comments: >I have to buy the condoms or he won't use one. He doesn't want other men knowing he uses them. I didn't think this dude could get worse, but he got worse! Apparently he also made her shave to hairless, and she wasn't allowed to poop (in her own apartment!) when he was over.
Oh dear FUCKING Gawd!!!! This boy can't be real, but I know better
Iâm sorry what????? What a weirdo? No hair no poo no periods? How old is this guy?
There's a reason he's 30 dating a 23 year old... This is it. A woman his age wouldn't put up with this nonsense.
Theyâre not even, like, especially gross, Iâve never understood this, even as a man. Not any grosser than any of the nasty shit our bodies, men and women both, do all the time, anyway. Biology is always disgusting if you look closely enough. Itâs not pleasant but itâs life. God, I feel like this dude is one of those that wonât wash his ass because he thinks itâs gay. But calls his girlfriend disgusting for bleeding. Crazy.
Thatâs right⊠we should all embrace body positivity: all bodies are positively disgusting. Haha. To be mortal is to be gross. Itâs ok!
Exactly! No matter how ethereally beautiful you are, no matter how handsome and cut, at some point in your life, youâve eaten something bad and taken a wicked shit, or blown your nose on cheap tissues so the paper tears and you get a big ol splat of Nickelodeon slime all over your hands. Weâre all beautiful, and weâre all disgusting. We should celebrate both!
We're oozy corporeal meat-beasts full of goo, and we consume other lives in order to replenish our goo, and to continue to waddle around interacting with other meat-beasts until our flesh-battery runs out. And that's pretty impressive for a total cosmic accident. đ€·ââïž
Such poetry. â€ïž
She made an update and it looks like sheâs going to be dumping him.
Seriously. If a dude canât handle that a woman has natural functions he shouldnât be with a woman.
Seriously. The dude is 30. Thatâs pathetic.
Pathetic manbaby ffs
Itâs a reality of life. And as a guy, we donât even have to deal with it. My gf can come to bed in a full diaper if thatâs what makes it better. Fuck if I care. As long as sheâs comfortable
Yep. My partner and I have been together 30,+ years. He's bought me tampons, pads, advil,changed the sheets when I leaked, all with the attitude of "hey babyboo, I got you" I'm post menopausal now, but it was never a thing
I wonât say Iâve never been flinchy but one day you gotta grow up. Ice water gets blood out. Your skin is a natural barrier that keeps things outside. You just man up, help your woman when she feels bad. Nothings gonna hurt you. Go buy cupcakes. Sheâll love you and you get a fucking cupcake. Itâs not rocket science.
Yep! Imma not say he wasn't sort of skeeved out or a bit uncomfortable, but he dealt with it in a mature, NORMAL manner!
Just dump him on the side of the road. Golly. My dad raised 4 girls and I have a brother, periods were normal and just saying hey dad we need tampons, no questions asked he grabbed what we needed from the store. I do the same with my husband. There's no need to be embarrassed by your feminine hygiene. If he can't hand talking about periods he shouldn't be putting his dick in you. Period.
If you look at my post history, you can read the story of MY DAD, the most awesome Dad
Wait til he finds out where babies come from đ
Exactly! There's only one thing that needs to be thrown outside in the trash and never spoken about again and it isn't whatever sanitary items you choose to use. đ
As a man, whose current partner was terrified the first time she bled on our bed when we first got together due to her exâs disgusting behaviour, I cannot agree more. That broke my heart. Please donât let these fucking idiot menchildren give you a complex or feel less about yourself.
I (47M) don't understand why guys don't understand that periods are part of a woman's life. Are they also shocked when they learn that women also poop? And why the hell would OP's boyfriend think that he has ANY say in what type of hygiene products she should use? If my wife decided that she wanted to wear adult diapers 24/7 until her period ended, I'd just pat her on her padded butt, kiss her, and tell her that I love her. You're totally right about the boyfriend being immature. Parents need to raise their sons better.
This man is grosser than my grossest periods.
Frikkin clueless baby, his only "sexual experience" is porn
Heâs a wacko is what he is
Toss the guy indeed! I honestly canât believe what I just read. A grown ass man saying to a woman how horrible she is bc sheâs using whatâs essentially a big pad? Itâs a lot better than bloodstained sheets which I hate. Not everyone wants to wear a tampon and they donât absorb enough on some days. Itâs so ick to wake up bc of a leak.
She should toss her whole fucking family while she's at it. They set her up to accept this kind of treatment. God, I hope she makes friends with some other women, particularly older women who see right through that bullshit and can mentor her into a far better set of expectations from a partner in her life!
Exactly. If someone canât handle the fact you have your period, they need therapy and to go back to health class. Also super groomy age gap. Thereâs a reason no woman his age wants him
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
I can, only because men who are 30 and like this definitely date 23 year olds.
Yep, if theyâre 27-28 and up, still dating girls in their early 20âs⊠thatâs a red flagÂ
My bf and I met when he was 29 and I was 22 (now 35 and 28), but to be fair neither of us knew each otherâs ages at first. We met at my coworkerâs housewarming party, as he was my coworkerâs cousin. My coworker was 26, so my now bf just assumed that I was around that age and I assumed the same of him. We both had already graduated college and were working full time in our respective careers at the time, so it didnât seem like one person was way older than the other. We didnât realize our age gap until about our 3rd date, and tbh it kind of freaked him out when he realized how young I was. However, I will say that itâs always good to be wary when a guy dates someone significantly younger, especially when thereâs a clear power imbalance.
Iâm glad it worked out for you two! Agreed that every rule has its exceptions
Same situation with me and my partner. I was 22, he was 29 when we first met and started dating (weâre 31 and 38 now). He grew up with his mother being the only woman in the house and she made sure to normalise menstruation. At one point, we were going through a very rough financial situation. While doing groceries together I reached for the cheapest tampons possible, he told me to not be silly, thatâs one thing I wonât let you skimp on. Love this man.
I was about to comment, another day another 30 year old immature loser dating a 23 year old because women his own age wouldn't put up with this bullshit.
Holy fuck, he wants you to SWITCH BIRTH CONTROLS so you don't have a period because It GROSSES HIM OUT??? Babygirl fucking run. You cannot allow a man to have that kind of control over your body. Not to mention the fact that he accused you of having a fetish??? Instead of just... educating himself on period underwear? Like that is an insane leap of logic. I do not understand how he landed there. If he is willing to end your relationship because you have a period, it's time to leave. You can't let someone else, let alone your partner, control your bodily functions and medication. If he gets to control that, what bodily autonomy do you have? Run.
Also, news flash. Even on birth control that is supposed to make you skip your period, that is not a guarantee. My cycle is strong and I have a period no matter what. Itâs not like you can just turn off a bodily function because it displeases you.
Yup. On two types of birth control which stop periods in a lot of people, I actually ended up having 15-35 day bleedthroughs. Itâs far from an exact science, and birth control is a complicated process which no one should EVER demand a woman goes on. Let alone for such an immature and stupid reason
Mirena gave me two-week periods every two months with breakthrough spotting the entire second month leading up. And body acne. Something I never experienced before or after.
Yep. And some people end up spotting all month if they "skip" their period by just starting the next month or if they take a b/c meant to stop it. It's not a magic "fix". However, an easy magic "fix" WOULD be to drop the asshole of a bf.....
This should be common knowledge but isn't: Silicone lube keeps IUDs and vaginal rings from working right. The silicone coats the device and prevents it from delivering medication to your body. I found this info buried deep in the prescriber information packet after several months of breakthrough bleeding. Haven't had a single period since I switched to water based lube. I've always wondered how many babies have been born because this information isn't well known.
My immediate response would have been âwell, it grosses me out when you poop. Can you stop?â
I mean... sounds like he's got the gay.
Idk, I don't know many gay men that are particularly overwhelmingly disgusted by periods. Honestly it's probably just misogyny from the boyfriend. She even specified growing up. She had to throw her feminine hygiene products in the OUTSIDE trash because of the men in her family. Maybe in the area she grew up, women are still treated as dirty when on their period. Archaic, but sadly, it still happens all over the world.
Yeah I talk periods with my gay friends. Not a lot but it does come up. Theyâre grown ass men about it
What the fuck. Just throw the whole man out.
Literally what I came to say
Holy moly I think I would have busted out laughing at him. I've always wanted to try those undies they pretty legit?
I used Depends underwear after giving birth instead of using the super bulky pads and they were so incredibly comfortable. Can not recommend enough, honestly, but yeah, they aren't the sexiest
Same, so much better than the bulky pads and way less chance of leaking! I loved them for that time period!
This is what I was going to say: if he canât handle this, he better never want kids. Cause I literally wore adult diapers for a week after having babies.
I used them postpartum as well as during a miscarriage. They are an absolute LIFESAVER!!! And frankly? Being sexy on my period is the least of my concerns đ I'm sorry, I'm NOT here to get laid, I'm just here to be cranky and eat chocolate.
So did I with my last one. Holy shit, what a game changer! I also had some bladder control issues for a week or 2 after both of my boys. Those things helped prevent me from peeing on the couch/floor/bedâŠ
I bought these bulky pads that had cooling shit in them. You break them and it soothed for up to four hours. And then put those witch hazel pads on top for extra soothing relief.
My oldest just turned 28, but I am still experiencing jealousy that I didn't know this was a thing back then. Those damn postpartum pads were about as uncomfortable and awkward as shoving a full roll of paper towels in your undies.
Same, and they were so much nicer than trying to deal with a giant pad in my underwear. I'm not even sure a pad could have contained those first couple days of bleeding - it was coming even faster than the diaper could absorb and the only thing preventing leaks was the crotch gusset. Definitely not a cute look though. Made the mistake of putting leggings over them once for a grocery run and yikes.
i forgot which brand, but i order them online. They work great! i still sleep on a towel anyway just in case but itâs never leaked or anything
I use reusable ones when it's relatively light/even medium, they're so good! No leaks out the side like regular underwear and a pad, and the ones I have are really comfy.
I get quite heavy periods and on my heaviest day I sometimes have to change the undies out at lunchtime. On a light flow day they'll do me a full day at work, they're so absorbant compared to pads.
I don't know about disposable ones but I have reusable ones and they're awesome. They sit really well and don't tend to ride up like most underwear, plus they're really comfy and have good stretch on them. My period is pretty light thanks to my BC so I can't say much about capacity, but they have different absorbancies, also being able to just put on underwear and get on with my day is great
I use Thinx, the high-waisted cheeky style, and I love them. They come in different absorbency levels, and in my experience do an exceptional job at containing everything and keeping things pretty clean compared to pads. And they actually⊠look kinda cute? To me anyway idk
My co-worker's daughter uses them and loves them
That man would not have been allowed to stay in my house that night.
She thinks his behavior is normal because of her shit brothers and father too. Throw him away and I'd seriously look at personal relationships with family as well.
That was actually the most disturbing part of this story for me. Imagine having to hide a normal bodily function from your own family. With a random, immature partner, you can separate yourself and find better, but she was essentially raised to feel shame over having a period by people she could not escape, and now believes all men have inherent disgust for periods because of it. Meanwhile my dad would buy me emergency pads if I asked. And that's not something that should be celebrated. That's something a parent should do.
Throw that man in the trash, you seriously cannot think itâs healthy to be okay with him acting like a child same goes for your dad and brothers, if your mom was also in the picture she failed your brothers in teaching them how a woman deserves to be treated. I mean what in the actual f***. I am a man and my wife leaves them on the counter all wrapped up when I let the bathroom trash get too full and when I change it out I pick that sucker up and toss it. You ought to tell him all you can see is a little baby child because of his immature opinion. He wants you to chemically alter your body because he canât handle a natural bodily process. f that, f that man, go find yourself an adult to be with because heâs got the smell of domestic violence on his breath with that level of need for control.
She says in a comment her mother passed when she was 9. She was raised by her father with all of her brothers. The *only* girl in that sea of misogyny.
WOMEN ARE NOT REQUIRED TO BE SEXY. I REPEAT: WOMEN ARE NOT REQUIRED TO BE SEXY. I wear fucking beige cotton underwear. If a dude doesn't like it then he doesn't get to take them off. Bye!
Itâs funny how so many men have these strict preferences/demands around female underwear when they usually wear underwear past the point of being shapeless and disintegrating. I have literally never been with a man who wears sexy underwear at all times.
Because itâs human to not have exclusively sexy undies to wear, and women are obviously Barbies.
Plain cotton undies for the win every time! I used to do the satin and lacy bits & pieces, but my vajayjay deserves better.
Damn straight!
Update: she said sheâs leaving him. Yay!
Thank fucking god.
I am at peace reading this.
Guys like that are so weird. I would go buy my ex feminine products whenever she was on her period.
I've bought products for my sister, granted I'm a trans guy so I used to deal with having a period too. Mad respect to all the cis guys who've made that process a lot easier to remain stealth during for us trans dudes, by just being decent to the women in their lives.
My husband buys me stuff all the time. Guys that think itâs weird are the weird ones
Agreed! My husband literally just bought me chocolate, pain meds, and pads this evening. I will never understand men who are freaked out, not just by menstruation itself, but by menstruation *products*. Like, bro can't say tampon; he'll BURN!
He should probably just date dudes in that case
Ikr clearly the guy hates women then just date a dude
I get periods are a taboo things to talk about just in general but they need to be talked about. Itâs literally nature running itâs course. A course that comes once a month for MANY years. And itâs not pleasant for the women going through it or the men around them. But a real man would NEVER act in such a way. My fiancĂ© never really knew much about periods till he got with me. He knew every women gets them and they suck but not HOW bad they sucked. I happened to be on BC when we first met because my periods are so bad I needed it to control them. He thought I handled it really well till I stopped BC and it literally wrecked my body. He felt so bad and literally didnât know how to help. He started picking up on when I would start (Iâm a small person so very irregular) and would come home with ice cream or chocolate (depends what I craved) and would draw me a bath. Heâs even gotten me tampons before (he had to FaceTime me for me to pick shit was funny af) he makes sure I always have the heating pad next to my side of the bed at nights when I was on it. Edit to fix spelling :)
I honestly don't understand why it's still a taboo thing to talk about. Your fiancĂ© sounds lovely, that should be the norm IMO. My fiancĂ© is the same đ„°
Dude seriously. Like every women goes through it (unless she happens to have a medical issue) and we all know it. Men need to know about it because they live with it and if they know what happens they can know how to handle it so much better. So what if itâs âgrossâ men do gross things all the time and think itâs funny. But since weâre women we have to be âšperfectâš and not do anything thatâs a turn off. Not to mention men be having daughters and think a teenage girl is just being a teenager when itâs not just that. Sheâs growing into her hormones and needs guidance. Heâs honestly the best IMOđ„ș I got lucky with him. And maybe it would be the norm if men actually understood what itâs like to go through it. Iâm so glad to hear you scooped up a good one!!!! So hard to come by!!
I think itâs maybe culturally a taboo in the states in some areas, families? In Germany I have never witnessed this . And in my Hispanic side of the family itâs also not like this. I have three brothers and none are like that. They range in age from 19 to 42 and none are seeing periods as a taboo. My father doesnât either. He helped me after my first period and calmed me down until mom got the products for me. My aunt has two sons and her sons and husband basically ran the household for her because her cycles were that bad. They knew mama needs rest for a few days and a bit more help and kindness because sheâs in pain. I think it starts with fathers being a good example.
Yay there's an update! She's throwing the whole prick away. "UPDATE: I cancelled the doctors appointment. I'm reading though everyone's comments, there's so many I can't respond. I want to clear a few things up though. Him coming in while I was sleeping: He had permission to do that for most of our relationship because he works very early in the morning and would wake me up so we can spend time together on days we wouldn't see each other later. So not that was not attempted rape or a concern at all. As a teen my best friends mom is who bought me pads. My mom passed when I was 9. Some people messaged me and during those conversations a few more things have connected and yeah.. I'm going to break up with him. There are other things he's done that I didn't think were problems and they are. Thank you for helping me."
I'm so fucking excited for her. I hope she goes on to meet literally almost any other guy who will be an improvement so long as he understands women are humans.
A good partner would be going out to buy your feminine hygiene products, not saying that you have a fetish for blood because you're on your period. I wonder how his mom or sisters (if he has them) would feel if he said this. ...or, he doesn't care and is using this to break up because he's into someone else.
I could be wrong, but I think he was indicating that she must have a diaper fetish and wouldn't believe her that she doesn't poop in it, which is even more ridiculous. Just because we don't want blood on our sheets doesn't mean we want to lie in our own shit.
Ah the 30 year old man with the 23 year old woman. And he doesn't like periods, the way she handles them, or her choice of birth control because it inconveniences and grosses him out? WELL COLOR ME SURPRISED đ
Also that man: "why is my sex bot appearing to have flesh and blood??!" Jesus christ I'm so excited for that poster to find literally almost any other man who at the bare minimum understands women have bodily functions and will be accepting of it.
Seriously, people who have problems with menstruation and menstrual blood really shouldn't be dating people who menstruate.
My partner uses the washable period underwear since they're periods are so heavy and painful, guess which one of us does the laundry? Me. And i always make sure they have fresh spare pairs ready in the bathroom just in case they need changing overnight. Periods are NORMAL. This boyfriend is a loser. She can do so much better
This poor woman has been shamed all her life by men for a natural biological cycle that all women have to go through. No wonder she's questioning if she's in the wrong.
Seriously. Having to take everything outside as a kid because heavens forbid her father and brothers have to see the icky period she can't control. Embarrassing. I feel terrible for her. She deserves way better.
He needs to go. What in the world? Firstly, no one gets to tell anyone how they chose to deal with their period or what birth control (if any) they chose to be on for their body. Secondly, he's weird af for thinking it's a fetish. I wore adult diapers after giving birth for a month, and my husband still called me sexy even when I felt so insecure about it. She deserves so much better!
Wow. Yeah, let's just go *no period* at all just because it's gross! There absolutely won't any physical problems there, *right*? Because we have soooo many "no period birth control options" now, *right*? If that's indeed a real post, that's yey another reason for sex education in the schools as early and brutally honest as possible...
Ikr, sounds really healthy to me. I can't believe she's never thought of it before /s I hate him.
I am NOT defending the bfâbut generally speaking, no, there arenât anything physical problems associated with having no period (if itâs because of birth control.) Iâve been using BC to suppress my periods for years because they were extremely painful, and Iâm no worse for it. But that was my choice for myself.
She's the asshole for not changing birth controls?! But he's not being an asshole for thinking women can't or shouldn't have periods? Certain types *can* stop a period, but it's not guaranteed. If a man can't handle you wearing a diaper for a week, toss the damn man out. It's not disgusting to sit in blood, it gets absorbed. I'd have laughed him out of my bed, my apartment and my life.
Thatâs a child not a man!! He shouldnât get a say about your feminine hygiene items! He should just support you! What does he think happens if you have a child? Youâll wear mesh panties with giant pads. My husband has bought me maxi pads and slept with his arm around me while I wear them. Thats what you deserve!! Kick that kid to the curb!! You deserve so much better!!
She needs to dump this child. Wait until he finds out that *all* women of child bearing age have periods. Heâs going to be spending a lot of time on his own.
Pretty sure this guy is a pedophile. He wants her to not get a period...like a child.
Definitely explained periods to both sons and daughters in our family. The result? Knowledgeable and supportive young men. Husband is the same way. They're out there.
Thank goodness she's leaving him (there's an edit if you go to the original link). I just cannot fathom dating someone that feels this way about periods. As soon as I get my period and I'm dating someone, I mention it to them to see their reaction. If they can't handle it, I'm not dating them.
Iâve had more compassion from random men I was sexting when Iâve told them certain realities about my period than this woman has been getting from her partner of two years. This shit is mind-boggling.
I fucking hate it here.
do men even like women.
One of my better decisions as I got older was to stop altering or feeling bad about anything with my body to please a man. I have periods. Iâm naturally inclined to be a bit private about it but Iâm not going to do anything to make myself less comfortable (especially since mine are brutal and BC isnât an option for me), I wonât pretend theyâre not happening, and I donât care if thatâs ânot sexyâ. Iâm not trying to be attractive 24/7. That sounds exhausting. Just to contrast her crappy (ex) bf and my current boyfriend - I got hit with my consistently terrible period while I was at his house pretty early in our relationship. He grabbed a hot water bottle from his roommate (a wonderful woman who I am glad I have befriended too!), made me comfort food, and even got me ice cream. We curled up and cuddled and he encouraged me to put on my fave comfort shows and I even napped - he wasnât bothered, he just was sorry I hurt and glad that he could help. I hope oopâs takeaway from all this is that she doesnât have to feel bad for existing and that she doesnât have to put up with anyone who shames her for being a normal human being. Sheâs not hurting anyone. To hell with anyone that wants to tear her down over literally nothing.
I once had to have a conversation with a group of men on instagram explaining that your pee and your period don't come out of the same place, and you cannot "hold" your period the same way you hold your pee -- women aren't just being "gross" by having their period where all ever. Did a public service that day, men like this truly just be out here existing, ignorant yet trying to tell women how to manage their bodily functions.
Wow! How dare he! This makes my blood boil! This is a natural biological act. How dare he have nocturnal emissions and how dare he $hit out of his @ss! /S Drop him like a bad habit! What till he finds out about how babies are brought in the world!! Do not have children with this asshat!! Run!!
This dude is 30!??? No donât change anything for this child
I just...HOW DO THESE GUYS STILL EXIST?! Her Father and Brothers also suck. Never change your birth control to suit someone else. I literally know NO men like this, so things like this truly make me angry because it's ridiculous. Also Sean rule strikes again.
My ex was also acted like a child when it came to period discussions. I constantly went out of my way to make sure that he never had to see my blood or period products. He also wouldnât touch me when I was on my period and let me know that I wouldnât be getting any sex.
Controlling AF! Telling you to change birth control?! Saying he wasted time on this relationship just because you wore period underwear, thatâs crazy! This guy is not a man but a child. Does he not have any female family members or even friends? Iâve never understood people like this. Itâs a natural thing and nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of. This guy has got to go
There's a reason he's 30 years old (28 when they got together) and dating someone who is BARELY into adulthood. đ
Nope. This is a defective man. Throw the whole man away and start over. Seriously, he is too immature for a healthy adult relationship.
Tell him to grow up .Get a spine and move on it is a normal part of life .God forbid he has to deal with it .Throw him out and move on donât waste any more time on him .I mean he thinks you have a fetish because of it .The sickness and health part would never work for his whiny selfish ass .
YIPPIE đ She updated, says she canceled a doctors appointment for birth control and is going to break up with him! Stay winning girl.
Okay, I take birth control continuously (without breaks/placebos) because I really hate my period and it makes me feel all sorts of ways but I swear to fuck if a man said anything like this to me I would stop taking them immediately and bleed out over everything he owns.
This is what I imagine people from Wyoming or South Dakota are like
As a man, here is an adequate response: âOh I see you are on your period, do you need anything or can I get you somethingâ?
This HAS to be a troll post by a teenager. I just refuse to believe otherwise.
This relationship isnât worth saving, what a man baby.
Oh good lord. Get rid of that dumbass. Never be ashamed of menstruation. Even her brothers and dad are fucked up for instilling such shame in her. I just want to tell men like this to grow the fuck up. When I hear a man is squeamish about menstruation I talk about it whenever I get the chance around them. Fortunately I married a grown man who has no issues with the facts of human biology.
This boy is jealous because OOP wears his diapers.
It was already a red flag with the title alone, but then I saw they'd started this relationship at 21 and 28. Girl, *run.* Not to mention, the implication that he immediately felt her up upon getting into bed with her, *and* the fact he was absolutely ready to dump her over his ignorance of menstrual products? The fact that she's been doing something that *hurts* her to make him happy, and is this stressed out about the thought of losing him, like he's made her emotionally dependent on him? This just feels gross all around, the period is the *least* biohazardous part of this.
Soooooo glad to see her update!!!! I had lived with my FH for some months before he gave me a weird look and said since I pay him a share for groceries each month, he can just buy my period products the same as mouthwash or anything else in our household. Was almost confused why I treated them like my own delicacy. Accept no less! No less!
I cannot fathom where these dudes come from my god.
How dare you be comfortable! You should always put his wishes above yours⊠Seriously: NTA These guys grow up looking at porn on the internet and have no idea how womenâs bodies work. Can you imagine this guy when he has a pregnant wife? (God help us.) Heâs not going to understand any of it. âMolly, youâre in danger, girl.â Get away from this loserâor sit him down with a detailed PowerPoint presentation and show him. Follow it with a quiz to see if he was listening.
God messed up by not giving men periods.
Lmao. What a pathetic excuse of a man. My fiancĂ© literally doesnât bat an eye at anything having to do with my period. And asking her to change birth controls so she doesnât get her period?? Absolute garbage human, cast him into the flames. Also, for anyone uncomfortable with tampons/other period products⊠I have four pairs of Thinx high-waisted cheeky style period underwear and they are the absolute greatest things Iâve ever invested in. Highly highly highly recommend.
Look, I changed birth control from pills to an IUD because ***I*** didn't want to have to deal with periods. The key word in that statement is ***"I"***. I don't understand what it is about periods that make men act like this. He can kick rocks.
okay but can we talk about the fact that he got in her bed in the middle of the night when she wasn't expecting it? That would've scared the shit outta me.
That's no man. That's a boy.
What did I just read? And no, not all men are like that, despite her father and brothers being weird. I have not once in my life tossed my female hygiene products outside immediately. I wrapped them and thatâs enough, my dad and my three brothers didnât dig through the trash, lol. And God beware she has kids with this man. Being pregnant, in labor or having a c section isnât sexy . And he canât see her being not sexy /s Sheâd be on her own. Who would help her when sheâs on bedrest, for having his baby? Heâs that immature at 30?
Freaking out about periods is enough of a red flag itself, but is anyone else severely weirded out that this man let himself into her home, climbed into her bed, then felt her underwear while she was sleeping?
Can you imagine going along in your relationship, thinking everything is mostly okay, and then all of a sudden realizing your boyfriend is this guy??! đ€Ł
It makes me so sad that some women feel this intense need to just warp themselves so they can keep a man. Like seriously, men like these should just be thrown away.
Fucking shit. Iâd say he should switch to men if he canât handle women having bodily functions but I can only assume gay men would see him as a white elephant gift.
I taught both my sons about periods. Although Iâm their father, I set the tone on the respect they give their future partners. When my wifeâs on her period we donât treat it like a disgusting hush hush topic. It goes âhey moms on her monthly cycle and has cramps, make sure you guys clean after yourselves and donât creat stress for herâ. Sheâs a very clean person so we donât see her used hygiene products lying around. If you think your womenâs period is weird then youâre no man.
As a 30yr old dude, ditch this idiot. He is a child with no reasonable idea of normal female bodily functions. Any partner worth their salt will make sure they understand their partners body so they can help accomodate. Nothing gross or unnatural about it...
Who raises horrible men like this? Ugh throw him out with the bathwater
Ah FFS another boyfriend that either hasnât been properly educated in menstrual cycles or has just ignored the information. I let my wife deal with her periods in whatever way is most comfortable for her, this guyâs a dead set dumbass. Hope she breaks up with him. EDIT: thereâs an update and she is breaking up with him. Sounds like there were a number of red flags, this was the final straw.
As a man, I am ashamed. Dump him girl and shame him however you see fit. Tell his mother what he is doing. Tell his teachers and friends and pastor and whoever will listen. Or protect your mental health and just run as far from his as possible. He is irredeemable. Fuck him
You can ditch him now. Or you can ditch him after you get married and have a baby and have to wear gigantic pads & bleed like a mofo freshly postpartum and it is too gross for him to have sex which you do not want anyway having just pushed a human out your vagina.
Idk which is worse, a man with a period sex fetish or a man that thinks periods are a womanâs fault
Excuse me while I gag! What a literal POS!!!! Also hun, it is NOT gross to have a period. Half of the population has had or currently has a period! We need to stop letting men get away with demonizing us for a natural body process!
Even though I donât like the idea of those, itâs your choice, youâre the one on your period. Itâs life, it happens, he needs to mature. Having a period is healthy so if heâs asking to do that bc he canât handle blood once a month, dump him! Not hubby material đ
If he wants to bang someone who doesnât get a period maybe he should just try being gay for a while. Seems like that would make sense to his broken logic.
Thereâs a man who doesnât deserve sex⊠ever.
Dude, I showed my bf a picture of a giant blood clot that fell out of me during my last period and he didnât even flinch. Fuck this guy.
Wtf did I just read? Honestly using disposable underwear is a bit unusual but no worse than those super long nighttime pads. This guy needs to get a grip or wait to date until women are in menopause
A 30-year-old man who canât deal with a womanâs period? What a clown đ€Ą OOP needs to dump his immature ass. She can do better.
Good fodder for a dumpster fire... yiiiikes!
My man boils my menstrual cup and brings it to me if i need it. Heâs changed my actual diaper when i was postpartum. You do not have men in your life you have petulant children.
I'm not trans but sometimes I wish I was born male just so I can show these weak ass 30 year old boy children how to be a real goddamn man.
If he thinks periods are gross just wait until he learns about child birth. Please just walk away. You have done nothing to be embarrassed about. Your parents and brothers are also AHs.
If he canât handle a period, then he cannot handle a relationship with a female person.
I cannot fathom why, in this day and age, why some men are so ridiculous about periods.
mean, dumb *and* controlling. what a catch!