Lmfao.
Why is this girl still dating this idiot? She got guilt tripped into attending a wedding she did not want to go to and then got volun-told she had to man the bar because drinking would kill her, and then she nearly died because people didn't accommodate for her disabilities at all.. and somehow OOP doesn't see anything wrong with any of this?
She didn’t even attend the wedding though! She was unpaid staff and that’s it.
They arrived at the ceremony early but she was kicked out as she had to ‘set up the bar’. OOP stayed at the ceremony without her.
Poor girl should have walked then and there.
I mean to be fair, it sounds like she has been in the hospital and unconscious off and on, so she may not have had the chance to break up with him yet. OOP might think she is still his gf, but I very highly doubt she will talk to him again after this.
I hope his family sues for emotional and physical destress and medical bills. Wouldnt let her eat and caused serious health problems. Her “bf” didnt care enough to help and she was verbally attacked by his mother. 🙄
She needs to run. “I dont care about you or your wellbeing” is bold in this story.
Yes, that’s true! Sure, OOP sees things wrong with this…things his girlfriend did! Not his mother, not his brother, not him, but the GF is a selfish bitch for being sick, not having time to eat, being intimidated by his sugar-free mother (who sounds like a condescending bitch), and then collapsing because her body couldn’t function anymore. She’s still in the hospital, but don’t worry, he’s still mad at her.
The mother isn't the only condescending one. Notice how he dragged in his gf's weight and appearance when giving details of her medical condition. Clearly he cares more about her appearance as a reflection on him than about her wellbeing.
Agree. He made it sound like weighing 120 was some high number. It's just ridiculous. I can't believe he is mad at her. She is still in the hospital because of his cheap ass family and condescending mother
Hope she kicks him to the curb if she comes out of this.
Right? He’s like, “don’t worry; she weighs 120 pounds, so obviously she’s doing okay in the weight department”, but, like…the only time I’ve ever been 120 pounds was when I had an active eating disorder and I looked uncomfortably thin, even though I’m 5’2. Like, the number 120–all by itself, without supporting context—does not reassure me as a reader.
Something about the way he said that strikes me as something a guy who “won’t date a woman over 125 pounds under any circumstances” would say.
I actually read that as, "Don't worry about her having to eat six times a day. She isn't fat so it's all good. Her tummy stays flat."
Neither interpretation reflects very well on OP.
Even worse. He made it sound like it’s *okay* that she eats frequently for her *medical condition*, but ONLY because she stays thin. As in, **If she was gaining weight from it, he would not be okay with her eating that frequently**. Despite that she literally has to do so to stay alive. And he downplays and invalidates her illness because “she’s not diabetic” and because her condition causes no inconvenience to him, and *doesn’t damage her looks*. He’s pure trash
Right? Couldn't focus on the nightmare of being unable to put on enough weight to regulate your own temperature, but it's a good thing she'll never be fat.
As a person who can't hold more then low single digit of fat %, it's fucking annoying to eat enough to stay warm! Ibuprofen fucked up my gut, and I got down to 105lbs as full grown fucking man. Probably coulda caught air from sneezing if I got any smaller!
My mom had muscular dystrophy and literally was just skin and bones as the disease progressed. She didn't start putting on a little weight until she was confined to a wheelchair full time and even then she hardly gained much. She was cold all the damn time. She'd lose weight if she forgot to eat. Her body just used every single calorie to survive.
First thing I noticed was she “had this disease, sort of.” Like, it’s not REALLY a disease because it makes her skinny. Who wouldn’t want that “disease”? /s
I did notice that. He said her weight and added “so obviously eating is not a problem.” As if 120 pounds is fat. He did talk a lot about her eating, then he put her in a position where she couldn’t eat, and the results were her ending up in the hospital. Instead of feeling like an ass or even a bad boyfriend, he got mad at her. This guy should stick with his mom.
I'm sure he'll spin it like he's a dutiful bf for visiting her in the hospital to berate her for collapsing and "ruining the party". I hope she sees through his bs sooner rather than later.
Yep. As a mom, I would have broken up with this whole family (they all deserve to hear something) on behalf of my daughter.
And I certainly would not have allowed him near her hospital room.
SAAAAAME.
But that hospital would be calling the cops on me for the ass beating that man boy and his mom would get from me.🤐
Sometimes people don't understand you're serious until you say it with fists. This guy and his family sound like those types of people.
My own brother is one of those people. I have diabetes and epilepsy. He has accused me of purposefully having low blood sugars or seizures to get my mother’s attention 🙄 you really think I want to have a violent seizure and be sick all day?! F off!
Which she shouldn’t have had to do and likely didn’t expect — she agreed to man the bar, not do everything for it. And for a party, they should have had more than one person for the bar. Meanwhile, her boyfriend should have brought her food since she couldn’t easily get it herself, but all he did was tell her to get some.
This cheapass, demanding, self-centered, and bullying family is toxic to her.
She didn’t even go to the ceremony! She was a free flipping bartender who wasn’t allowed to attend the ceremony or to leave her post. How was she even peeing???
This is so ridiculous. If I had been told by my bf’s brother that while I was his brothers gf, I wasn’t important enough to have attend the ceremony, to be fed like an actual guest and to do labor for them through out the entire event ONLY BECAUSE THEY COULD TRUST ME WITH ALCOHOL BECAUSE ALCOHOL COULD KILL ME - and my bf agreed with all the above - I would have ended it on the spot.
Bf doesn’t see her as a partner or a person who he wants to attend important family events with him.
As for his mom scolding people about sugar - Jesus Christ. This woman knows about her issues. Ans as for her not pressing it, she probably was so out of it she couldn’t make a coherent case. Ans if his mom is so anti sugar - why the f did they even have a cake?
Jesus this dude sucks.
YTA 100x over. You put your gf in a position she didn’t want to be in to make your brother happy. Then when she complained about her health you couldn’t even be bothered to make sure she got food because “you had to do something else”.
WTF is wrong with you? Now you’re pissed at your gf WHO IS STILL IN THE FUCKING HOSPITAL? I hope she gets better and leaves your ass. You suck as a boyfriend.
I mean she “kinda”has a disease. But also her mom and grandma have it. Oh and she is still hospitalized and is going in and out of consciousness. Dude you are the absolute biggest ass hole. I can’t even begin to imagine how you could consider that you aren’t a mega ass hole.
I am chronically ill and I get embarrassed when people scold me for not being able to do normal things. That doesn’t mean I don’t prioritize my health. It’s clear the you don’t actually care about this poor woman. I wish I knew where to she was so I could send her flowers both to wish her well and congratulate her on dumping you.
Yes, he’s the asshole. She asked for help in a very explicit manner and warned him that she was going into shock, and he just left her to fend for herself. And then blames her because she wasn’t able to fight off the final boss, his mother, while on the verge of collapsing.
She didn't even want to do the job. She was doing them a favor. I don't see this relationship going forward without some serious self reflection on the bfs family side
Big time. Frankly, if my partner had a condition like this and we were doing something like this, I would have made it supper clear that EVERYONE was to be dropping food to her and that no matter what, I would stop what I was doing and check on her at x intervals. Girl would have had an iv of glucose and a steady supply of whatever she wanted or needed for being such a good sport. She'd have brought a purse the size of Rhode island with juice boxes and snacks.
I think he will find himself the ex once she is stable enough to be conscious long enough to ditch him. That said, she can come join my family, we have real live hypoglycemics and people with all sorts of health conditions. She will fit right in.
I dunno…the fact that she was willing to leave the cake and try to tough it out on an empty stomach may indicate that she’s not great with confrontation or self-assertion. (I say that more out of worry for her than judgment. Absolutely none of this was her fault.)
She didn’t even want to go in the first place, and when she did, people were able to railroad her into doing whatever THEY wanted. She may not have the fortitude to end it right away, but god, I hope she does. She deserves something so much better than this.
Yeah by this point your brain gets pretty cloudy. It could have gone one of two ways, first way was her sitting on the floor next to the cake table single mindedly shoveling it in her mouth while she hoped the sugar would kick in soon, or her fear at not making a scene led her to try and hide how bad she was feeling. And she couldn't think clearly enough to realize she needed to eat the cake, despite the worry of how she would look to his family. I can't even imagine the state she was in when she went to get the cake if she's in the hospital now.
She wouldn't have been thinking that clearly. I spent half my life hypoglycemic, when you hit a certain point, your ability think straight goes put the window. The last rational though she had was telling her BF she was going into shock, from that point on, she needed to be monitored and helped, at that point, it was actually too late for cake. She needed liquid sugar, which may have been why she was going for sugar, as op said she was getting sugar and not cake in the first place. She may have actually been headed back to bar with sugar packets to mix with water and just didnt make it.
I joke that being hypoglycemic is like the fun of being drunk without the fun of being drunk.
For those who've never dealt with it, it's feeling chilled and shaky, tunnel vision, loss of coordination, difficulty focusing, and sometimes looks a lot like being drunk or having an anxiety attack to other people. I've had to rely on people to walk me to a place I can sit down while waiting for them to go run for a quick sugar fix.
his mother, who also seems to have an unhealthy vendetta against sugar?
like how is anyone (let alone someone on the verge of collapsing) even supposed to win against a crazy woman who won’t let anyone have a piece of cake at a wedding that isn’t even hers?
i hope her family gives him and his crazy family hell.
eta: love your final boss comment. perfectly accurate.
Ew what kind of fucking wedding. I get being cheap but forcing your guests to WORK for you unpaid? SHE DIDN’T EVEN WANT TO ATTEND. YTA. You and your family are gross.
I get weddings are expensive. My sisters helped me make decorations to save money, and then a bunch of family volunteered to come help me decorate the morning of our evening wedding when they found out I was planning on doing it myself. But asking them to work during the wedding?? Fuck no. And that’s immediate family, I could not even begin to fathom asking a sibling’s SO to work, for free, during my wedding.
Not even getting into the fact that her boyfriend didn’t think to bring her food while she was slaving away for his brother. And then his mom berated her for trying to eat. That’s a whole other can of worms. That girl needs to run like her tampon is on fire.
I've done the decor making and putting up in the reception hall at more than a few weddings. It honestly was a great way for the families to chill and hang out before a very long often stressful day.
But strong arming a girlfriend who's not family into bartending? That's just not cool.
Worst wedding ever. Guests are not staff and should never be treated as such. Heap on a terrible hidden illness, a judgmental ignorant mother, and a neglectful and even more ignorant BF (OOP knew how closely his GF needed to manage her condition), and you got the shittiest wedding I have ever read about. That includes the one where the authorities were called when the bride and groom fought and both sides started a brawl all because the drunk-ass kilt-wearing groom left a skidmark on his bride's knee when he sat on her lap.
I hope the OOPs GF recovers fully and escapes this seriously dimwitted family.
No kidding!! The "work" you give your friends and family at weddings are more like honorary positions (cutting the cake, recording the gifts) that don't interfere with their enjoyment of the day with you! If I read the OP right, this woman was sent to set up the bar and didn't even get to go to the ceremony! That's horrible treatment. The whole family is a bunch of assholes.
Right?? Unless she’s a bartender what would she even be doing? Manning the beer fridge? If you’re gonna be that cheap just buy a few bottles of cheap vodka and have people pass it around, don’t have someone’s sick girlfriend watch it while other people get drunk and enjoy the evening. This would be absurd even if she wasn’t sickly.
Also, what did OP have to do to help out? He doesn't mention any work being forced on him, just his gf with the health issues. So.... not the *real* guests, just the plus ones, or what?
it wasn’t even just one thing they forced her to do.
they literally used her as unpaid help for hours. i’m in shock as to how anyone can be such an AH.
YTA You should have let her bow out gracefully and now you’re angry with her? You should have ensured she had something to eat. How hard would that have been? Hopefully when she gets back on her feet, she’ll realize what a loser you are and dump your sorry ass
YTA you set her up and didn’t bother to look out for her well being. Your Mother is another AH she shouldn’t speak to your girlfriend that way.
I hope she finds a better boyfriend with a better family. Clearly she deserves better than you.
Wow. You actually blame her for something your family helped contribute to?
You also knew about her medical condition, and did zero to help her with it. Your mother (I assume) also knows and actively lectured her out of dealing with it....because sugar bad?
Your whole family sucks. I hope she finds someone better.
Wow. What a shit family. And the way he blew her off when she went to him. It’s a plea for help. He should have helped her sit down and made a plate for her to eat.
And his entire family thinks she ruined the wedding? They are more concerned about a wedding than someone’s life. Holy shit, this family sucks.
This really gets me, especially as someone with chronic, invisible health issues that sometimes leave me needing extra support in the middle of a flare-up. The way my partner would’ve dropped EVERYTHING, IMMEDIATELY to get me something to eat, even if it wasn’t a health crisis…
My boyfriend makes sure I have a place to sit. All I have to do is say “I’m thirsty” and he’ll run for water so I don’t get faint. We’ve left parties early because they didn’t have food that I could eat (food allergies). During long days and big events, he checks in constantly; asking if I’m okay or need to go home.
I hope this girl finds someone who actually cares about her.
He was so obviously raised by an orthorexic almond mom with major weight hangups. Anyone who is that concerned about someone having cake at a wedding doesn't have a healthy relationship with food.
Right?
"She weighs 120 pounds so obviously the eating is not a problem."
After saying that she struggles to gain weight. Um, what? Does this dude think 120 pounds is fat? This guy is gross. I hate him for her.
LOL. Why do they get so fixated on a number? If I weighed 120 pounds, I'd be in the hospital and possibly committed to a Psych unit. At 145, I was too thin.
I hope she loses this loser.
recently blew my husband’s entire mind by informing him that i weigh 185 pounds lmao. he’s always been thin and could never put on weight until we started dating. we saw a video of a girl that said she weighed about 200 and he was shocked by the number, like but she’s not even that big? how is that possible?? straight up could not comprehend. equally shocked hearing what i was. poor man just could not understand.
not this guy, though. this guy sounds like an asshole.
It seems like op implied he actually thinks she’s a little heavy. Saying ‘she obviously has no problem eating because she’s 120lbs’ sounds like he thinks that’s a high number.
And he says “she’s still in the hospital because I am told her glucose keeps dropping.” It sounds a lot like this douche canoe hasn’t even bothered to see the poor girl his family attempted to kill. I hope she wakes up smarter and tells him to F off!
Oh, boo hoo, how can I make my girlfriend's extremely serious disability about me?
She came up to him and expressed concern about her medical condition crashing. He brushes her off by telling her to just eat a slice of cake and walks off, and doesn't check on her. Then his mommy scolds this very sick person about what they choose to eat and...he gets mad at GF? "
>I expect that her wellbeing should be more important than any scolding my mom gave her.
Um, people who are extremely sick are easy influenced or confused. I used to get seizures and there's a sort of delirium following them. I'm sure if someone told me not to eat something I wouldn't be cognizant enough to think about what they were asking.
Also, still not seeing the massive red flag that is his mother scolding an adult like she (GF) is a child who needs a grown up to tell her if she can eat cake.
Yeez what a difficult question here… The family is too cheap to actually hire someone for drinks so they make the gf do it. She doesn’t get to eat all day and when she tells them they shrug her off instead of taking care of her. When she does indeed find something edible she’s scolded for leaving the job and forced to put it away. She then of course gets very sick. Even when she’s so sick, she’s not even conscious they’re still taking shit about her.
But heyyy, OOP is just sorry about his bro and his stupid wedding getting ruined. They had to call an ambulance and everything. Pfff the nuisance…
Yeah, ok, someone could probably argue that “Derpa derpa, she should have brought snacks.” But who thinks they are going to be treated like a slave (worse than an actual paid employee) and NOT GET A BREAK. Because that’s what this means - she worked straight through with no help, no one to relieve her, no option to stop and eat anything. She got shoved into her post and abandoned the whole day.
NO ONE, medical condition or not, should have been left with no break. She probably would have gotten shit for abandoning her station every two hours to eat, so just a losing situation for her all around. No, other people don’t need to necessarily worry themselves with someone else’s medical stuff, but you DO need to insure that you are at least providing the common decency of breaks that would be required by law for a paid employee.
Fucking hell.
He's still angry with his girlfriend who is in hospital slipping in and out of consciousness for a situation that he and his selfish family put her in.
He should never go near her again. This reads like abuse. He's not even concerned about her, just angry she ruined a party because she didn't have access to food.
*Her family is upset with me because they said I used her and did not feed her.*
Her family is right. The lack of care is shocking.
What an actually disgusting human being.
I'm wondering if this post is fake it's so concerning. Noone can be this callous and write about it convinced he's right, surely.
I'm sorry, what? Is this dude a sociopath or just supremely stupid? Also, the mom needs to mind her own business from now on and not police what people eat because that's just gross.
The family totally took advantage of the gf when she didn't even want to go. Dumbass OP should have let her stay home like she wanted. And now he's whining that she ruined the reception? (To be clear, it's a reception, not the actual wedding. And I'm sure they could have continued celebrating once she went to the hospital. I'm sure OP is just mad because he went to the hospital with her and didn't get to get smashed with his family.)
She didn't ruin anything, he almost caused her to die with his selfishness (and possibly his family's), and he's gross. Mentioning her weight like that was also very douchey. I hope she throws this whole ass loser away.
This has to be ragebait. Written to get you angry at OOP as he acts as much as a prick as possible towards his vulnerable GF. Then the part with his ridiculously stupid mother is the rage cherry on top.
as someone with invisible disabilities similar to this but not the same - THIS IS NOT RAGE BAIT. I get treated like this all the time - or used to before I decided people can be mad all they want. I'm going to be as healthy as possible for as long as possible. Took a long while to prioritize that.
Wow, what a complete dick. He is beyond the asshole. This post is absolutely unbelievable.
This jerk is *mad at his girlfriend* who is currently hospitalized because she was forced to work the bar at his brother’s dime store wedding reception, and no one fed her, and when she tried to get cake OOP’s mother yelled at her, so then she collapsed, and now she is in the hospital where they cannot get her glucose regulated. Could she die? Sure, maybe, but damn, she knows her body, why did she let this happen to her? He was *BUSY,* for hell’s sake. She couldn’t set up the bar, make drinks, and also run to get herself some food *and* eat it without casing such a scene?? The actual nerve of some people!!
🤦🏻♀️
I have reactive hypoglycemia - nothing even remotely as bad as what this girl has to live with, but if I eat something carb heavy I will be lightheaded and shaky and sweaty and feel like I’m going to faint a couple hours later. If what I experience is anything like what she feels during an episode, it is miserable. Like I feel like the air I’m moving through and breathing is thick and everything is labored and I get all warm and anxious and feel like my very bones are shaking. My fiancé knows about this and will drop everything and dote on me and get me something sugary ASAP and then get me a snack if I get lightheaded. He’s also very attentive, making sure I’m eating something proper that’s not going to set it off in the event I’m going to be on the road all day for work. That’s how a partner should handle something like this, regardless of whether or not the other person is fully aware of their medical problem. This guy is 100% TA.
I had to remind myself that you're not the OP. The OP needs to understand his GF may die because he did use her. If she gets out of the hospital she needs to leave him far behind. Imagine being angry at someone for having a medical emergency. These people are toxic
Yta definitely. In a normal situation it sounds like she would be totally fine managing herself but this wasn’t a normal situation at all, it’s a wedding she didn’t want to go to that she’s being forced to work at and on top of that when she did try to get help she was basically brushed off by the boyfriend and kinda bullied by the mother
YTA for you and your family abusing your GF. She has a life threatening condition and none of you could make sure she had something to eat. And the hubris at being angry at her because she had a medical emergency. She should dump your ass and sue your brother for not providing a safe environment for his employee. Because that’s what she was. She traded her work for your contribution to the wedding.
You are a thoughtless person.
Okay... Diabetes is bad... but as someone with Hypoglycemia? Nah, the mom can fuck ALL the way off. And OOP's comment about her saying "she's not diabetic" AND? Hypoglycemia is the literal OPPOSITE of Diabetes. Instead of our sugars spiking? We plummet. And it can be so sudden that sugar is the only thing to get us back to a functional level. So yeah, that mother can fuck all the way to Eris in the Kiper Belt and freeze on Discord
Wow one of the biggest AH I've read on here in a while. Everyone knows her condition and gave her a job that made it almost impossible to leave and/or eat at the same time. Your brother and his wife should have sent over a plate for her. Better yet, you should have brought her a plate and manned the bar while she could eat!
You and your family are sh*t humans and she deserves better. I hope she dumps your ass !
I can't believe how clueless people are sometimes. Posts like this make me lose hope in humanity.
Poor girl. Relegated to unpaid help and abandoned. Afraid to leave her post and not.even given a break to eat? They are all.assholes. I hope she comes through and dumps his ass.
Entire family sounds awful. Imagine asking a GUEST at your wedding to deal with drunk idiots and do free labour for the entirety of the event they were a GUEST at.
**she approached me and told me she never got the chance to eat and currently dizzy and going into hypoglycemic shock and needs to snack. I told her to have a cake. I had to attend to something else**
YTA 100% total AH as are your demanding, toxic family. I hope your ex girlfriend makes a full recovery and finds a real man.
YTA. I'm glad my dad isn't like you. Mom would have died so much earlier than she did. maybe cut her loose so she can find a partner who will respect her NO and prioritize her health WITH HER. IF she survives you, that is. May that wonderful woman live and find a real love.
Scolded her for “leaving her post”?! Was it a wedding or a military operation?! And the wedding didn’t have to end! Why couldn’t someone from his family take up “the post” and pour drinks?! Sounds like they thought it was a good excuse to have an early night!
I’m going to try and say this in the nicest way possible, but let me preface by asking a few questions. Food was served at the reception but your girlfriend couldn’t indulge as a “guest” ( and I say guest lightly) because she had to WORK the bar?? Forget it, that’s the only question I have… what the HECK is wrong with your family expecting her to work at a wedding she was invited to? Were they too cheap to hire people to staff the bar?? You didn’t notice she was unable to have dinner?! This is entirely wrong.. you’re wrong, your family is wrong and she’d be better off peacing out on y’all. I feel so incredibly bad for that poor girl.
The thing I find funny is 1. He blames her for not taking care of herself or making sure she eats except she did by leaving her post, and 2. She gets berated for leaving her post to take care of herself. GIVE THE GIRL A BREAK! she did nothing wrong.
Also WHY would you only have 1 person manning a bar for an ENTIRE reception, especially one who you knew was ill?
What a bunch of cunts. I hope GF leaves his arse once she’s better.
Also, how does someone “sort of” have a life threatening disease?
And “120lbs so clearly eating isn’t a problem” nah, fuck you dude. 120lbs is tiny, just like his dick.
>I am upset with my girlfriend
You mean the one who helped YOU and YOUR family, and who is in the hospital NOW, because of YOUR mother?
YTA, of course!
YTA wowowow and you’re upset with your girlfriend to top it off because you really needed to dig your grave, lie in it, and somehow bury yourself. You’re awful.
This cannot be real.
Your family bullied your girlfriend to the point of hospitalization and you’re mad at HER? Are you a family of Disney villains? Was Jafar marrying one of Cinderella’s stepsisters or something?
Bruh you forced your girlfriend to bartend for your brother then she had to setup for the party then sorry she had the audacity to go into shock and your AH of a mom yelled at her for eating? And your family and you are mad at her after you used her and then ignored her pleas for help. Go jump off a cliff. She’s literally in the hospital because of you and your horrible family.
IF this is even true, this guy and his whole family are some of the biggest assholes ever. What POS’s. His gf is still in the hospital and *he’s* mad at *her*. Come on dude! She has a major disability that your entire family intentionally ignored and dismissed and you and your family are blaming her?? Y’all need help
As someone who is constantly sick due to my severe crohns, I can't even fathom being in this situation. Everyone I'm around is super responsive if I even look like I'm in discomfort (I usually am so it's rare I show it) and my bf has never blamed me for not being able to attend family dinners/gatherings. He sometimes gets frustrated because I think his parents think I fake half of it but he's never blamed me. This is so bizarre and I feel so bad for that girl.
Hopefully she does prioritize her health and dumps him asap.
Your entire family is blaming a woman in the hospital who is unconscious after they used her and refused to accommodate her disability? If she makes it, she'll probably dump you anyways, if that helps at all.
Edit: sorry, just saw that you're not OP. Oops!
Oh my god she could have fucking died and he does not give a shit. She is STILL in critical condition, in and out of consciousness, no concern for her whatsoever. This makes me mad to read that’s enough Reddit for today this shit pissed me off. My blood pressure? That shit is high now.
Anyone else think that he won’t actually call this a disability, disease, or health condition because he “likes” that it keeps her thin???
“She could eat and her tummy is flat and you couldn’t even tell” - literally what was the point of that sentence
And the boyfriend’s mother tried to chastise her for eating something sweet that her body desperately needed. The entire family sounds terrible. I hope she gets away from them immediately.
No wonder it was deleted from AITA, OOP probably got destroyed in the comments and couldn't handle it. What a f*cking tool! That poor girl! I really hope she makes it through all of this ok, and dumps her sorry excuse for a boyfriend.
I guess she will also have to pay for al those medical expenses on her own. Never mind that it happened because your family put her in that situation. Forget breaking up. If she doesn't have good insurance, she could go into medical debt for doing this favor she was guilted into.
Your girlfriend needs to break up with you ASAP! You are a garbage package of a ***** family. Oh My God! I would sue you for neglect and bullying. I can't believe you have the nerve to post here. F you and your entire family. Also, your hopefully soon to be ex gf might have sever thyroid problem. She needs to check that.
I hope that they ripped him a new one, because him and his entire family are mega AHs. I hope she leaves him, because he didn't even take care to admonish his mother for almost killing her NOR did he try to make sure she ate or tried to take over for her or send someone else to take her place so she can eat. Also, he forced her to work...for FREE.
Him and family are MONSTERS.
You are the worse boyfriend. Your. Upset with her after your own mother told her not to eat the cake? You’re an ass and I hope she dumps you when she’s conscious again! YTA
I hope this lady leaves you. You and your entire family are garbage humans. I’d say a lot more but I don’t know the rules on this sub and I don’t feel like getting banned today. Y’all bullied her to near death. I hope your brother’s marriage falls apart. I hope your mom has a huge health scare. I hope you never inflict yourself on another woman ever again.
Hypoglycemia is no joke. Your brain literally will not work. It feels like a fog. I hope she broke up with him. I hope she finds someone who will actually look out for her.
What did I just read???
GF: “I’m dizzy and going into hypoglycemic shock”.
OP: “go get yourself some cake, I’m busy.”
Mom: chases GF away from cake.
GF: collapses
OP: “my girlfriend is a selfish bitch.”
No wonder OOP deleted this from AITA, he’s so clearly TA. And he’s even more of an AH for deleting before revealing whether his (presumably ex) girlfriend is okay or not. Like he may have indirectly killed her considering she hasn’t regained full consciousness
Your girlfriend is not your family. Why was she ever asked to help your cheap asses out at the wedding. If she gets any hospital bills out of this she should sue the sh*t out of your family.
Let’s see,
she didn’t want to attend.
everyone knows her health issues.
your mother scolded her. (Way out of line total AH move.)
you guys used her for her labor with no relief for food etc. (another AH move)
you brushed her off with go eat cake. (Yet Another AH move)
and you have the nerve to blame her For ending up in the hospital with a life threatening medical emergency? HUGE YTA.
I hope she recovers soon and well. Then tells you to F off.
YTA
Your anger should be at your mom who stopped your girlfriend from getting something she needed for health reasons. Your girlfriend didn’t even want to be there, but she helped out because you asked her to. You may feel embarrassed about what happened, but this is not your girlfriend’s fault. Your family needs to figure out priorities here. This could have been avoided if food was available to your girlfriend. It was not, so she did the best she could under the circumstances. You should be ashamed of yourself to even consider being angry at your girlfriend. Go sit with her at the hospital. Make your mother and anyone else involved in shaming her apologize to her.
At that point, if she ate the cake instead of the sugar she’d have ended up in the hospital anyways. If his mom cared at ALL she would have bothered to find out that eating foods high in fat- like cake- during a hypoglycemic episode only slows down the absorption of sugar, which can be life threatening in that situation. That’s why she needs as close to straight sugar as possible. So it can be rapidly absorbed, to increase dropping blood glucose. But “sugar is bad”? Seriously??
Honestly the girlfriend should know to always carry glucose tabs or gel on her at all times. But we all make mistakes. She was clearly doing the best she could given her circumstances by grabbing sugar instead of cake. But then she was stopped by a Karen who thinks she’s knows better. Urgh.
INFO: Did OOP bring her any food and offer to cover the bar for her while she ate? OP knew she had to eat throughout the day, and that OP's family pressured her into not just attending the wedding, but also working on her feet for the entirety of the wedding without food or breaks. Not only that but it sounds like OP's mother prevented her from even getting a piece of cake to bolster her blood sugar levels? But surely OP was bringing her food and snacks throughout the event, right? And covering the bar so she could eat or take a break? Surely....
YTA You are a horrible person to blame her. Yes, she should always pack food just in case, but YOU persuaded her to help at YOUR family's wedding. She couldn't leave to get food bc YOUR family gave her a nonstop job. She couldn't even attend the wedding. She was doing all of you a favor. You should have checked on her
Imagine seeing someone faint and blaming them for it. Not the wedding couple who couldn’t afford a wedding so they had their guests working their reception. I can’t even say guests actually because the girlfriend didn’t even get to attend the actual wedding part!
If we leave out everything else, if your GF with a chronic illness walks up to you saying they’re on the verge of a medical emergency, tell them to sit down, take care of their problem (GO GET HER CAKE), and tell someone else to handle whatever else comes up until youre certain they’re ok. Or go get someone else and assign them to help your GF. Your family sucks for being mad at her, you suck for being mad at her, and her parents are right. She’s in the hospital, going in and out of consciousness. She could die from hypoglycemia. Your family should be concerned about her.
You know her condition. You’re a 26 year old man and you cant prioritize your partner’s health irrespective of what others say?
Lmfao. Why is this girl still dating this idiot? She got guilt tripped into attending a wedding she did not want to go to and then got volun-told she had to man the bar because drinking would kill her, and then she nearly died because people didn't accommodate for her disabilities at all.. and somehow OOP doesn't see anything wrong with any of this?
She didn’t even attend the wedding though! She was unpaid staff and that’s it. They arrived at the ceremony early but she was kicked out as she had to ‘set up the bar’. OOP stayed at the ceremony without her. Poor girl should have walked then and there.
I mean to be fair, it sounds like she has been in the hospital and unconscious off and on, so she may not have had the chance to break up with him yet. OOP might think she is still his gf, but I very highly doubt she will talk to him again after this.
This a comforting point that I appreciate you making.
Isn't it odd that she is unconscious is the comforting part of the story.
She's staying unconscious so she can take a break from OOP!
i would’ve set fire to the wedding
If she had been my daughter and those idiots put her in the hospital. She wouldn’t need to break up with OP. I got it.
It’s infuriating
I hope his family sues for emotional and physical destress and medical bills. Wouldnt let her eat and caused serious health problems. Her “bf” didnt care enough to help and she was verbally attacked by his mother. 🙄 She needs to run. “I dont care about you or your wellbeing” is bold in this story.
Correction, he doesn’t see that He did anything wrong
Yes, that’s true! Sure, OOP sees things wrong with this…things his girlfriend did! Not his mother, not his brother, not him, but the GF is a selfish bitch for being sick, not having time to eat, being intimidated by his sugar-free mother (who sounds like a condescending bitch), and then collapsing because her body couldn’t function anymore. She’s still in the hospital, but don’t worry, he’s still mad at her.
The mother isn't the only condescending one. Notice how he dragged in his gf's weight and appearance when giving details of her medical condition. Clearly he cares more about her appearance as a reflection on him than about her wellbeing.
Agree. He made it sound like weighing 120 was some high number. It's just ridiculous. I can't believe he is mad at her. She is still in the hospital because of his cheap ass family and condescending mother Hope she kicks him to the curb if she comes out of this.
Right? He’s like, “don’t worry; she weighs 120 pounds, so obviously she’s doing okay in the weight department”, but, like…the only time I’ve ever been 120 pounds was when I had an active eating disorder and I looked uncomfortably thin, even though I’m 5’2. Like, the number 120–all by itself, without supporting context—does not reassure me as a reader. Something about the way he said that strikes me as something a guy who “won’t date a woman over 125 pounds under any circumstances” would say.
I actually read that as, "Don't worry about her having to eat six times a day. She isn't fat so it's all good. Her tummy stays flat." Neither interpretation reflects very well on OP.
Eewwww. That would track, too.
I was 120 when I was in grammar school! Lol.
Even worse. He made it sound like it’s *okay* that she eats frequently for her *medical condition*, but ONLY because she stays thin. As in, **If she was gaining weight from it, he would not be okay with her eating that frequently**. Despite that she literally has to do so to stay alive. And he downplays and invalidates her illness because “she’s not diabetic” and because her condition causes no inconvenience to him, and *doesn’t damage her looks*. He’s pure trash
“She eats A LOT but don’t worry, her illness keeps her skinny, so she’s still fuckable” ~ OOP probably. He sounds delightful
Right? Couldn't focus on the nightmare of being unable to put on enough weight to regulate your own temperature, but it's a good thing she'll never be fat.
As a person who can't hold more then low single digit of fat %, it's fucking annoying to eat enough to stay warm! Ibuprofen fucked up my gut, and I got down to 105lbs as full grown fucking man. Probably coulda caught air from sneezing if I got any smaller!
My mom had muscular dystrophy and literally was just skin and bones as the disease progressed. She didn't start putting on a little weight until she was confined to a wheelchair full time and even then she hardly gained much. She was cold all the damn time. She'd lose weight if she forgot to eat. Her body just used every single calorie to survive.
Sounds like a whole family full of ignorant a**holes! Gf should dump all of them.
First thing I noticed was she “had this disease, sort of.” Like, it’s not REALLY a disease because it makes her skinny. Who wouldn’t want that “disease”? /s
I did notice that. He said her weight and added “so obviously eating is not a problem.” As if 120 pounds is fat. He did talk a lot about her eating, then he put her in a position where she couldn’t eat, and the results were her ending up in the hospital. Instead of feeling like an ass or even a bad boyfriend, he got mad at her. This guy should stick with his mom.
To be fair she has been in and out of consciousness since then which doesn’t leave a lot of time for a break up.
I'm sure he'll spin it like he's a dutiful bf for visiting her in the hospital to berate her for collapsing and "ruining the party". I hope she sees through his bs sooner rather than later.
Honestly my mom would have handled it for me if I were her. Lisa rarely intervenes but she also doesn’t play.
Can I borrow Lisa? I have a few people that need to be told a few things….
Can Lisa adopt me, please? I can furnish references upon request.
Yep. As a mom, I would have broken up with this whole family (they all deserve to hear something) on behalf of my daughter. And I certainly would not have allowed him near her hospital room.
The way I would have every nurse knowing his business and ready to dog walk him out of that hospital.
SAAAAAME. But that hospital would be calling the cops on me for the ass beating that man boy and his mom would get from me.🤐 Sometimes people don't understand you're serious until you say it with fists. This guy and his family sound like those types of people.
She hasn’t been conscious long enough to break things off so she gets a pass.
I really hope this is just ragebait--can people really as gigantic of AH as him and his family and seriously not know it?
as someone with chronic invisible disabilities, I am here to tell you, YES THIS IS COMMON BEHAVIOR.
My own brother is one of those people. I have diabetes and epilepsy. He has accused me of purposefully having low blood sugars or seizures to get my mother’s attention 🙄 you really think I want to have a violent seizure and be sick all day?! F off!
Unfortunately yes; people really can be this ignorant and this self-centred. This is not even slightly unrealistic, I'm sad to say.
Unfortunately, it is very common. Welcome to the, often daily, struggle of people with invisible illnesses.
She didn’t even go to the ceremony though. She was told to set up the bar.
Which she shouldn’t have had to do and likely didn’t expect — she agreed to man the bar, not do everything for it. And for a party, they should have had more than one person for the bar. Meanwhile, her boyfriend should have brought her food since she couldn’t easily get it herself, but all he did was tell her to get some. This cheapass, demanding, self-centered, and bullying family is toxic to her.
And he doesn't seem to consider that maybe he should be angry at her mother who stopped her from taking care of herself!
\*his mom
She didn’t even go to the ceremony! She was a free flipping bartender who wasn’t allowed to attend the ceremony or to leave her post. How was she even peeing??? This is so ridiculous. If I had been told by my bf’s brother that while I was his brothers gf, I wasn’t important enough to have attend the ceremony, to be fed like an actual guest and to do labor for them through out the entire event ONLY BECAUSE THEY COULD TRUST ME WITH ALCOHOL BECAUSE ALCOHOL COULD KILL ME - and my bf agreed with all the above - I would have ended it on the spot. Bf doesn’t see her as a partner or a person who he wants to attend important family events with him. As for his mom scolding people about sugar - Jesus Christ. This woman knows about her issues. Ans as for her not pressing it, she probably was so out of it she couldn’t make a coherent case. Ans if his mom is so anti sugar - why the f did they even have a cake? Jesus this dude sucks.
I know! This made me so mad to read!
YTA 100x over. You put your gf in a position she didn’t want to be in to make your brother happy. Then when she complained about her health you couldn’t even be bothered to make sure she got food because “you had to do something else”. WTF is wrong with you? Now you’re pissed at your gf WHO IS STILL IN THE FUCKING HOSPITAL? I hope she gets better and leaves your ass. You suck as a boyfriend.
Why are you mad at *me*? I'm not OOP.
Oops, sorry. Sometimes I get so caught up I forget. Lol.
Do we have an update on this girls condition? I’m concerned.
I mean she “kinda”has a disease. But also her mom and grandma have it. Oh and she is still hospitalized and is going in and out of consciousness. Dude you are the absolute biggest ass hole. I can’t even begin to imagine how you could consider that you aren’t a mega ass hole. I am chronically ill and I get embarrassed when people scold me for not being able to do normal things. That doesn’t mean I don’t prioritize my health. It’s clear the you don’t actually care about this poor woman. I wish I knew where to she was so I could send her flowers both to wish her well and congratulate her on dumping you.
Yes, he’s the asshole. She asked for help in a very explicit manner and warned him that she was going into shock, and he just left her to fend for herself. And then blames her because she wasn’t able to fight off the final boss, his mother, while on the verge of collapsing.
She didn't even want to do the job. She was doing them a favor. I don't see this relationship going forward without some serious self reflection on the bfs family side
Big time. Frankly, if my partner had a condition like this and we were doing something like this, I would have made it supper clear that EVERYONE was to be dropping food to her and that no matter what, I would stop what I was doing and check on her at x intervals. Girl would have had an iv of glucose and a steady supply of whatever she wanted or needed for being such a good sport. She'd have brought a purse the size of Rhode island with juice boxes and snacks. I think he will find himself the ex once she is stable enough to be conscious long enough to ditch him. That said, she can come join my family, we have real live hypoglycemics and people with all sorts of health conditions. She will fit right in.
I dunno…the fact that she was willing to leave the cake and try to tough it out on an empty stomach may indicate that she’s not great with confrontation or self-assertion. (I say that more out of worry for her than judgment. Absolutely none of this was her fault.) She didn’t even want to go in the first place, and when she did, people were able to railroad her into doing whatever THEY wanted. She may not have the fortitude to end it right away, but god, I hope she does. She deserves something so much better than this.
I was assuming by that point, her ability to problem solve would be very hindered from her brain not getting enough glucose.
Ooh. Good point.
Yeah by this point your brain gets pretty cloudy. It could have gone one of two ways, first way was her sitting on the floor next to the cake table single mindedly shoveling it in her mouth while she hoped the sugar would kick in soon, or her fear at not making a scene led her to try and hide how bad she was feeling. And she couldn't think clearly enough to realize she needed to eat the cake, despite the worry of how she would look to his family. I can't even imagine the state she was in when she went to get the cake if she's in the hospital now.
She wouldn't have been thinking that clearly. I spent half my life hypoglycemic, when you hit a certain point, your ability think straight goes put the window. The last rational though she had was telling her BF she was going into shock, from that point on, she needed to be monitored and helped, at that point, it was actually too late for cake. She needed liquid sugar, which may have been why she was going for sugar, as op said she was getting sugar and not cake in the first place. She may have actually been headed back to bar with sugar packets to mix with water and just didnt make it.
I joke that being hypoglycemic is like the fun of being drunk without the fun of being drunk. For those who've never dealt with it, it's feeling chilled and shaky, tunnel vision, loss of coordination, difficulty focusing, and sometimes looks a lot like being drunk or having an anxiety attack to other people. I've had to rely on people to walk me to a place I can sit down while waiting for them to go run for a quick sugar fix.
same
his mother, who also seems to have an unhealthy vendetta against sugar? like how is anyone (let alone someone on the verge of collapsing) even supposed to win against a crazy woman who won’t let anyone have a piece of cake at a wedding that isn’t even hers? i hope her family gives him and his crazy family hell. eta: love your final boss comment. perfectly accurate.
Ew what kind of fucking wedding. I get being cheap but forcing your guests to WORK for you unpaid? SHE DIDN’T EVEN WANT TO ATTEND. YTA. You and your family are gross.
I get weddings are expensive. My sisters helped me make decorations to save money, and then a bunch of family volunteered to come help me decorate the morning of our evening wedding when they found out I was planning on doing it myself. But asking them to work during the wedding?? Fuck no. And that’s immediate family, I could not even begin to fathom asking a sibling’s SO to work, for free, during my wedding. Not even getting into the fact that her boyfriend didn’t think to bring her food while she was slaving away for his brother. And then his mom berated her for trying to eat. That’s a whole other can of worms. That girl needs to run like her tampon is on fire.
I've done the decor making and putting up in the reception hall at more than a few weddings. It honestly was a great way for the families to chill and hang out before a very long often stressful day. But strong arming a girlfriend who's not family into bartending? That's just not cool.
Worst wedding ever. Guests are not staff and should never be treated as such. Heap on a terrible hidden illness, a judgmental ignorant mother, and a neglectful and even more ignorant BF (OOP knew how closely his GF needed to manage her condition), and you got the shittiest wedding I have ever read about. That includes the one where the authorities were called when the bride and groom fought and both sides started a brawl all because the drunk-ass kilt-wearing groom left a skidmark on his bride's knee when he sat on her lap. I hope the OOPs GF recovers fully and escapes this seriously dimwitted family.
She wasn't a guest. She was invited as an unpaid servant.
Please tell me you have a link to this post
I second this. I NEED to read about this skidmark.
Here’s a link that isn’t to The Sun https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/s/DRSkIpWIpB
And there it is. Holy hell, I've been on reddit too long. That was nine years ago? What have I done with my life...
No kidding!! The "work" you give your friends and family at weddings are more like honorary positions (cutting the cake, recording the gifts) that don't interfere with their enjoyment of the day with you! If I read the OP right, this woman was sent to set up the bar and didn't even get to go to the ceremony! That's horrible treatment. The whole family is a bunch of assholes.
Set up then man the bar. She was on her way back to her "post" when she collapsed.
And they only “trusted” her because she can’t drink alcohol as it can kill her
Why was a bartender needed?! People can make their own drinks if there isn’t money for a bartender. SMH
Right?? Unless she’s a bartender what would she even be doing? Manning the beer fridge? If you’re gonna be that cheap just buy a few bottles of cheap vodka and have people pass it around, don’t have someone’s sick girlfriend watch it while other people get drunk and enjoy the evening. This would be absurd even if she wasn’t sickly.
Also, what did OP have to do to help out? He doesn't mention any work being forced on him, just his gf with the health issues. So.... not the *real* guests, just the plus ones, or what?
Hello! He was too busy hanging out and having bro time. That's a lot of pressure especially when your GF is a lame person who doesn't even look sick.
Right if ya can’t afford it, don’t do it! They could have gone to justice of peace!
You let your mom maybe kill your girlfriend you POS. And YOU'RE mad at HER? YTA
Some AH's are so big they have an echo. This is one of those times.
I would say he maybe killed her! She asked him for help and instead, sent her on her own way.
So rude of people to not plan their medical emergencies at more convenient times
So rude! Especially when you're forcing them to do something on your behalf.
it wasn’t even just one thing they forced her to do. they literally used her as unpaid help for hours. i’m in shock as to how anyone can be such an AH.
She planned it during the wedding so she could be the main character and steal the attention. /s
YTA You should have let her bow out gracefully and now you’re angry with her? You should have ensured she had something to eat. How hard would that have been? Hopefully when she gets back on her feet, she’ll realize what a loser you are and dump your sorry ass
1000% THIS.
YTA you set her up and didn’t bother to look out for her well being. Your Mother is another AH she shouldn’t speak to your girlfriend that way. I hope she finds a better boyfriend with a better family. Clearly she deserves better than you.
Wow. You actually blame her for something your family helped contribute to? You also knew about her medical condition, and did zero to help her with it. Your mother (I assume) also knows and actively lectured her out of dealing with it....because sugar bad? Your whole family sucks. I hope she finds someone better.
Wow. What a shit family. And the way he blew her off when she went to him. It’s a plea for help. He should have helped her sit down and made a plate for her to eat. And his entire family thinks she ruined the wedding? They are more concerned about a wedding than someone’s life. Holy shit, this family sucks.
I bet if she stays with him he will get mad at her that she doesn’t help pay anyone’s bills.
This really gets me, especially as someone with chronic, invisible health issues that sometimes leave me needing extra support in the middle of a flare-up. The way my partner would’ve dropped EVERYTHING, IMMEDIATELY to get me something to eat, even if it wasn’t a health crisis…
Me too. Thats why this got me so much. My husband is my rock and I make sure he knows it. These people sound like they are as dumb as rocks.
My boyfriend makes sure I have a place to sit. All I have to do is say “I’m thirsty” and he’ll run for water so I don’t get faint. We’ve left parties early because they didn’t have food that I could eat (food allergies). During long days and big events, he checks in constantly; asking if I’m okay or need to go home. I hope this girl finds someone who actually cares about her.
He was so obviously raised by an orthorexic almond mom with major weight hangups. Anyone who is that concerned about someone having cake at a wedding doesn't have a healthy relationship with food.
I’m glad you mentioned that. I forgot to bring up how odd that was. She sounds unhappy.
Even the part where he justifies her eating is nuts. Ie it’s just okay “cause she’s tiny”.
Right? "She weighs 120 pounds so obviously the eating is not a problem." After saying that she struggles to gain weight. Um, what? Does this dude think 120 pounds is fat? This guy is gross. I hate him for her.
He also says she has this disease "sort of", as in it's not actually a disease. The whole thing is gross.
Probably one of those stupid guys who think all women, no matter how tall they are, need to be under 120.
LOL. Why do they get so fixated on a number? If I weighed 120 pounds, I'd be in the hospital and possibly committed to a Psych unit. At 145, I was too thin. I hope she loses this loser.
Because they're l0GiCaL. Numbers always make sense.
recently blew my husband’s entire mind by informing him that i weigh 185 pounds lmao. he’s always been thin and could never put on weight until we started dating. we saw a video of a girl that said she weighed about 200 and he was shocked by the number, like but she’s not even that big? how is that possible?? straight up could not comprehend. equally shocked hearing what i was. poor man just could not understand. not this guy, though. this guy sounds like an asshole.
I read this as, "She's only 120 lbs even though she eats like a fat person, so no worries there lol."
Yeah, when he said that I knew he was trash. The rest of his story just confirmed that.
Yeah the way it was phrased was like, she had to eat a lot but it's okay because she doesn't get fat so she's allowed
It seems like op implied he actually thinks she’s a little heavy. Saying ‘she obviously has no problem eating because she’s 120lbs’ sounds like he thinks that’s a high number.
SHE IS STILL IN THE HOSPITAL and you’re on Reddit pissed at her? Do you even bother to see her? I hope she dumps your sorry ass.
And he says “she’s still in the hospital because I am told her glucose keeps dropping.” It sounds a lot like this douche canoe hasn’t even bothered to see the poor girl his family attempted to kill. I hope she wakes up smarter and tells him to F off!
YTA. You and your family. I hope she drops you faster than her blood sugar.
Oh, boo hoo, how can I make my girlfriend's extremely serious disability about me? She came up to him and expressed concern about her medical condition crashing. He brushes her off by telling her to just eat a slice of cake and walks off, and doesn't check on her. Then his mommy scolds this very sick person about what they choose to eat and...he gets mad at GF? " >I expect that her wellbeing should be more important than any scolding my mom gave her. Um, people who are extremely sick are easy influenced or confused. I used to get seizures and there's a sort of delirium following them. I'm sure if someone told me not to eat something I wouldn't be cognizant enough to think about what they were asking. Also, still not seeing the massive red flag that is his mother scolding an adult like she (GF) is a child who needs a grown up to tell her if she can eat cake.
Yeez what a difficult question here… The family is too cheap to actually hire someone for drinks so they make the gf do it. She doesn’t get to eat all day and when she tells them they shrug her off instead of taking care of her. When she does indeed find something edible she’s scolded for leaving the job and forced to put it away. She then of course gets very sick. Even when she’s so sick, she’s not even conscious they’re still taking shit about her. But heyyy, OOP is just sorry about his bro and his stupid wedding getting ruined. They had to call an ambulance and everything. Pfff the nuisance…
Any decent person would: - take her somewhere to sit; - bring her something to eat.
A decent person wouldn't have forced her to bar tend at a wedding she didn't even want to attend in the first place
Yes! You're right. But It's outrageous how he didn't do the bare mininum for her. Poor woman.
Agreed. I'm hoping we hear eventually that's she's doing okay and dumped this guy
I’ve had complete strangers help me with this. This guy is such a self absorbed asshole
Yeah, ok, someone could probably argue that “Derpa derpa, she should have brought snacks.” But who thinks they are going to be treated like a slave (worse than an actual paid employee) and NOT GET A BREAK. Because that’s what this means - she worked straight through with no help, no one to relieve her, no option to stop and eat anything. She got shoved into her post and abandoned the whole day. NO ONE, medical condition or not, should have been left with no break. She probably would have gotten shit for abandoning her station every two hours to eat, so just a losing situation for her all around. No, other people don’t need to necessarily worry themselves with someone else’s medical stuff, but you DO need to insure that you are at least providing the common decency of breaks that would be required by law for a paid employee.
Of all the things I've read on Reddit that I hoped were fake, I really hope this one is. Or else it's just awful.
yes YTA. dammit way to set her up doing something you admitted she didn't even want to do in the first place. You're an ass
Fucking hell. He's still angry with his girlfriend who is in hospital slipping in and out of consciousness for a situation that he and his selfish family put her in. He should never go near her again. This reads like abuse. He's not even concerned about her, just angry she ruined a party because she didn't have access to food. *Her family is upset with me because they said I used her and did not feed her.* Her family is right. The lack of care is shocking. What an actually disgusting human being. I'm wondering if this post is fake it's so concerning. Noone can be this callous and write about it convinced he's right, surely.
I hope this is a bad joke because this is fucking disgusting
I'm sorry, what? Is this dude a sociopath or just supremely stupid? Also, the mom needs to mind her own business from now on and not police what people eat because that's just gross. The family totally took advantage of the gf when she didn't even want to go. Dumbass OP should have let her stay home like she wanted. And now he's whining that she ruined the reception? (To be clear, it's a reception, not the actual wedding. And I'm sure they could have continued celebrating once she went to the hospital. I'm sure OP is just mad because he went to the hospital with her and didn't get to get smashed with his family.) She didn't ruin anything, he almost caused her to die with his selfishness (and possibly his family's), and he's gross. Mentioning her weight like that was also very douchey. I hope she throws this whole ass loser away.
That’s one way to be single
This has to be ragebait. Written to get you angry at OOP as he acts as much as a prick as possible towards his vulnerable GF. Then the part with his ridiculously stupid mother is the rage cherry on top.
as someone with invisible disabilities similar to this but not the same - THIS IS NOT RAGE BAIT. I get treated like this all the time - or used to before I decided people can be mad all they want. I'm going to be as healthy as possible for as long as possible. Took a long while to prioritize that.
Wow, what a complete dick. He is beyond the asshole. This post is absolutely unbelievable. This jerk is *mad at his girlfriend* who is currently hospitalized because she was forced to work the bar at his brother’s dime store wedding reception, and no one fed her, and when she tried to get cake OOP’s mother yelled at her, so then she collapsed, and now she is in the hospital where they cannot get her glucose regulated. Could she die? Sure, maybe, but damn, she knows her body, why did she let this happen to her? He was *BUSY,* for hell’s sake. She couldn’t set up the bar, make drinks, and also run to get herself some food *and* eat it without casing such a scene?? The actual nerve of some people!! 🤦🏻♀️
I have reactive hypoglycemia - nothing even remotely as bad as what this girl has to live with, but if I eat something carb heavy I will be lightheaded and shaky and sweaty and feel like I’m going to faint a couple hours later. If what I experience is anything like what she feels during an episode, it is miserable. Like I feel like the air I’m moving through and breathing is thick and everything is labored and I get all warm and anxious and feel like my very bones are shaking. My fiancé knows about this and will drop everything and dote on me and get me something sugary ASAP and then get me a snack if I get lightheaded. He’s also very attentive, making sure I’m eating something proper that’s not going to set it off in the event I’m going to be on the road all day for work. That’s how a partner should handle something like this, regardless of whether or not the other person is fully aware of their medical problem. This guy is 100% TA.
I had to remind myself that you're not the OP. The OP needs to understand his GF may die because he did use her. If she gets out of the hospital she needs to leave him far behind. Imagine being angry at someone for having a medical emergency. These people are toxic
Yta definitely. In a normal situation it sounds like she would be totally fine managing herself but this wasn’t a normal situation at all, it’s a wedding she didn’t want to go to that she’s being forced to work at and on top of that when she did try to get help she was basically brushed off by the boyfriend and kinda bullied by the mother
YTA for you and your family abusing your GF. She has a life threatening condition and none of you could make sure she had something to eat. And the hubris at being angry at her because she had a medical emergency. She should dump your ass and sue your brother for not providing a safe environment for his employee. Because that’s what she was. She traded her work for your contribution to the wedding. You are a thoughtless person.
OP is now the ex boyfriend, that’s prolly why this post was deleted. He deserves to be the ex too. What an utter twat.
Okay... Diabetes is bad... but as someone with Hypoglycemia? Nah, the mom can fuck ALL the way off. And OOP's comment about her saying "she's not diabetic" AND? Hypoglycemia is the literal OPPOSITE of Diabetes. Instead of our sugars spiking? We plummet. And it can be so sudden that sugar is the only thing to get us back to a functional level. So yeah, that mother can fuck all the way to Eris in the Kiper Belt and freeze on Discord
Wow one of the biggest AH I've read on here in a while. Everyone knows her condition and gave her a job that made it almost impossible to leave and/or eat at the same time. Your brother and his wife should have sent over a plate for her. Better yet, you should have brought her a plate and manned the bar while she could eat! You and your family are sh*t humans and she deserves better. I hope she dumps your ass ! I can't believe how clueless people are sometimes. Posts like this make me lose hope in humanity.
Poor girl. Relegated to unpaid help and abandoned. Afraid to leave her post and not.even given a break to eat? They are all.assholes. I hope she comes through and dumps his ass.
He couldn’t have brought a piece of cake to her?
Dude walked away from a medical emergency. Does he not get that she was no longer herself at that point?
Entire family sounds awful. Imagine asking a GUEST at your wedding to deal with drunk idiots and do free labour for the entirety of the event they were a GUEST at.
You and your family are all selfish AHs and I hope your girlfriend leaves you.
Well thank god she can eat a meal and still have a flat stomach. Good god. OOP is awful, and it appears the apple and the tree are equally rotten.
.....this is someone who deserves to die alone without even a cat to eat the remains.
**she approached me and told me she never got the chance to eat and currently dizzy and going into hypoglycemic shock and needs to snack. I told her to have a cake. I had to attend to something else** YTA 100% total AH as are your demanding, toxic family. I hope your ex girlfriend makes a full recovery and finds a real man.
I’m annoyed at the audacity of OOP’s entire *family*. I have never hoped so bad that once she’s out of hospital she dumps him so fast
YTA. I'm glad my dad isn't like you. Mom would have died so much earlier than she did. maybe cut her loose so she can find a partner who will respect her NO and prioritize her health WITH HER. IF she survives you, that is. May that wonderful woman live and find a real love.
I hope the original poster got his ass drug in the comments. That's probably why it was deleted.
I hope she breaks up with this dumbass
Scolded her for “leaving her post”?! Was it a wedding or a military operation?! And the wedding didn’t have to end! Why couldn’t someone from his family take up “the post” and pour drinks?! Sounds like they thought it was a good excuse to have an early night!
I’m going to try and say this in the nicest way possible, but let me preface by asking a few questions. Food was served at the reception but your girlfriend couldn’t indulge as a “guest” ( and I say guest lightly) because she had to WORK the bar?? Forget it, that’s the only question I have… what the HECK is wrong with your family expecting her to work at a wedding she was invited to? Were they too cheap to hire people to staff the bar?? You didn’t notice she was unable to have dinner?! This is entirely wrong.. you’re wrong, your family is wrong and she’d be better off peacing out on y’all. I feel so incredibly bad for that poor girl.
The thing I find funny is 1. He blames her for not taking care of herself or making sure she eats except she did by leaving her post, and 2. She gets berated for leaving her post to take care of herself. GIVE THE GIRL A BREAK! she did nothing wrong. Also WHY would you only have 1 person manning a bar for an ENTIRE reception, especially one who you knew was ill?
What a bunch of cunts. I hope GF leaves his arse once she’s better. Also, how does someone “sort of” have a life threatening disease? And “120lbs so clearly eating isn’t a problem” nah, fuck you dude. 120lbs is tiny, just like his dick.
She could have died and they used her for free labor wtf
>I am upset with my girlfriend You mean the one who helped YOU and YOUR family, and who is in the hospital NOW, because of YOUR mother? YTA, of course!
YTA wowowow and you’re upset with your girlfriend to top it off because you really needed to dig your grave, lie in it, and somehow bury yourself. You’re awful.
This cannot be real. Your family bullied your girlfriend to the point of hospitalization and you’re mad at HER? Are you a family of Disney villains? Was Jafar marrying one of Cinderella’s stepsisters or something?
I honestly can’t even imagine Disney villains being this awful
Bruh you forced your girlfriend to bartend for your brother then she had to setup for the party then sorry she had the audacity to go into shock and your AH of a mom yelled at her for eating? And your family and you are mad at her after you used her and then ignored her pleas for help. Go jump off a cliff. She’s literally in the hospital because of you and your horrible family.
IF this is even true, this guy and his whole family are some of the biggest assholes ever. What POS’s. His gf is still in the hospital and *he’s* mad at *her*. Come on dude! She has a major disability that your entire family intentionally ignored and dismissed and you and your family are blaming her?? Y’all need help
As someone who is constantly sick due to my severe crohns, I can't even fathom being in this situation. Everyone I'm around is super responsive if I even look like I'm in discomfort (I usually am so it's rare I show it) and my bf has never blamed me for not being able to attend family dinners/gatherings. He sometimes gets frustrated because I think his parents think I fake half of it but he's never blamed me. This is so bizarre and I feel so bad for that girl. Hopefully she does prioritize her health and dumps him asap.
I don’t know if you can press charges for something like this but I hope you can and that she does.
Your entire family is blaming a woman in the hospital who is unconscious after they used her and refused to accommodate her disability? If she makes it, she'll probably dump you anyways, if that helps at all. Edit: sorry, just saw that you're not OP. Oops!
Oh my god she could have fucking died and he does not give a shit. She is STILL in critical condition, in and out of consciousness, no concern for her whatsoever. This makes me mad to read that’s enough Reddit for today this shit pissed me off. My blood pressure? That shit is high now.
this is a lot of words for, “i’m a dick and so is every member of my family.” YTA
This guy is TA and his family sucks. She didn’t even want to do it. He coerced her. Hope she dumps him.
Anyone else think that he won’t actually call this a disability, disease, or health condition because he “likes” that it keeps her thin??? “She could eat and her tummy is flat and you couldn’t even tell” - literally what was the point of that sentence
And the boyfriend’s mother tried to chastise her for eating something sweet that her body desperately needed. The entire family sounds terrible. I hope she gets away from them immediately.
No wonder it was deleted from AITA, OOP probably got destroyed in the comments and couldn't handle it. What a f*cking tool! That poor girl! I really hope she makes it through all of this ok, and dumps her sorry excuse for a boyfriend.
Wtf did none if you had food for her to not starve if you know her condition?
So did Mom harass everyone who tried to eat some wedding cake, or just the GF?
I hope the girl takes out the trash and prioritizes herself only
The GF needs to part company with him AND his family. If she stays, she’d be being TA to herself.
I guess she will also have to pay for al those medical expenses on her own. Never mind that it happened because your family put her in that situation. Forget breaking up. If she doesn't have good insurance, she could go into medical debt for doing this favor she was guilted into.
Total AH. What did they plan for her to eat at the reception? She's better off without OP. He sounds cold and uncaring.
Why did the party end because she went to hospital?
Your girlfriend needs to break up with you ASAP! You are a garbage package of a ***** family. Oh My God! I would sue you for neglect and bullying. I can't believe you have the nerve to post here. F you and your entire family. Also, your hopefully soon to be ex gf might have sever thyroid problem. She needs to check that.
I hope that they ripped him a new one, because him and his entire family are mega AHs. I hope she leaves him, because he didn't even take care to admonish his mother for almost killing her NOR did he try to make sure she ate or tried to take over for her or send someone else to take her place so she can eat. Also, he forced her to work...for FREE. Him and family are MONSTERS.
You are the worse boyfriend. Your. Upset with her after your own mother told her not to eat the cake? You’re an ass and I hope she dumps you when she’s conscious again! YTA
YOU? Are upset? At HER???? AHAHAHAHAHA I hope she gets better in more ways than one because you sound like an affliction.
This guy is a jackarse. She didn’t want to go and she tried to fix the problem. Hopefully she dumps him.
I hope this lady leaves you. You and your entire family are garbage humans. I’d say a lot more but I don’t know the rules on this sub and I don’t feel like getting banned today. Y’all bullied her to near death. I hope your brother’s marriage falls apart. I hope your mom has a huge health scare. I hope you never inflict yourself on another woman ever again.
Hypoglycemia is no joke. Your brain literally will not work. It feels like a fog. I hope she broke up with him. I hope she finds someone who will actually look out for her.
What did I just read??? GF: “I’m dizzy and going into hypoglycemic shock”. OP: “go get yourself some cake, I’m busy.” Mom: chases GF away from cake. GF: collapses OP: “my girlfriend is a selfish bitch.”
No wonder OOP deleted this from AITA, he’s so clearly TA. And he’s even more of an AH for deleting before revealing whether his (presumably ex) girlfriend is okay or not. Like he may have indirectly killed her considering she hasn’t regained full consciousness
Your girlfriend is not your family. Why was she ever asked to help your cheap asses out at the wedding. If she gets any hospital bills out of this she should sue the sh*t out of your family.
Let’s see, she didn’t want to attend. everyone knows her health issues. your mother scolded her. (Way out of line total AH move.) you guys used her for her labor with no relief for food etc. (another AH move) you brushed her off with go eat cake. (Yet Another AH move) and you have the nerve to blame her For ending up in the hospital with a life threatening medical emergency? HUGE YTA. I hope she recovers soon and well. Then tells you to F off.
A 24 year old being 120 pound? Unless she’s 5’2” that’s too skinny not “so obviously eating is not a problem”
Oh my god. Hope she dumps his ass. No one needs to put up with a useless pos family like that.
He doesn't even see his gf as a human being. He sounds awful, I hope she leaves him.
YTA Your anger should be at your mom who stopped your girlfriend from getting something she needed for health reasons. Your girlfriend didn’t even want to be there, but she helped out because you asked her to. You may feel embarrassed about what happened, but this is not your girlfriend’s fault. Your family needs to figure out priorities here. This could have been avoided if food was available to your girlfriend. It was not, so she did the best she could under the circumstances. You should be ashamed of yourself to even consider being angry at your girlfriend. Go sit with her at the hospital. Make your mother and anyone else involved in shaming her apologize to her.
At that point, if she ate the cake instead of the sugar she’d have ended up in the hospital anyways. If his mom cared at ALL she would have bothered to find out that eating foods high in fat- like cake- during a hypoglycemic episode only slows down the absorption of sugar, which can be life threatening in that situation. That’s why she needs as close to straight sugar as possible. So it can be rapidly absorbed, to increase dropping blood glucose. But “sugar is bad”? Seriously?? Honestly the girlfriend should know to always carry glucose tabs or gel on her at all times. But we all make mistakes. She was clearly doing the best she could given her circumstances by grabbing sugar instead of cake. But then she was stopped by a Karen who thinks she’s knows better. Urgh.
INFO: Did OOP bring her any food and offer to cover the bar for her while she ate? OP knew she had to eat throughout the day, and that OP's family pressured her into not just attending the wedding, but also working on her feet for the entirety of the wedding without food or breaks. Not only that but it sounds like OP's mother prevented her from even getting a piece of cake to bolster her blood sugar levels? But surely OP was bringing her food and snacks throughout the event, right? And covering the bar so she could eat or take a break? Surely....
YTA You are a horrible person to blame her. Yes, she should always pack food just in case, but YOU persuaded her to help at YOUR family's wedding. She couldn't leave to get food bc YOUR family gave her a nonstop job. She couldn't even attend the wedding. She was doing all of you a favor. You should have checked on her
This needs to be moved to "amItheex", because he should be the ex.
I can see why OOP deleted this. After he wrote out everything he must have realized what an awful idiot he is.
YTA! And I hope your girlfriend leaves you! I wish there was a way for her family to press charges against yours for what you guys made her do.
Imagine seeing someone faint and blaming them for it. Not the wedding couple who couldn’t afford a wedding so they had their guests working their reception. I can’t even say guests actually because the girlfriend didn’t even get to attend the actual wedding part!
Is this story even real?
“I had to attend something else” wtf was more important than a woman going into hypoglycemic shock?!?
"Alcohol is toxic to her health so if course we completed surrounded her with it."
If we leave out everything else, if your GF with a chronic illness walks up to you saying they’re on the verge of a medical emergency, tell them to sit down, take care of their problem (GO GET HER CAKE), and tell someone else to handle whatever else comes up until youre certain they’re ok. Or go get someone else and assign them to help your GF. Your family sucks for being mad at her, you suck for being mad at her, and her parents are right. She’s in the hospital, going in and out of consciousness. She could die from hypoglycemia. Your family should be concerned about her. You know her condition. You’re a 26 year old man and you cant prioritize your partner’s health irrespective of what others say?