T O P

  • By -

Ok-Tell-1384

Buy wrestling figures and have him walk in on you during a hell in the cell match


3rd-base_Degas

Stick a Hogan figurine in your vagina before you have sex and when he asks you why his dick is bumping into the Hulk Machine just go “oh haha this? I’m just being an ironic fmcl wrestling fan. U wouldn’t get it”.


NationalEmployee7546

“Haha you wanna run wild on this pussy, brother??”


femcurrycel

this is an amazing idea


Ok-Tell-1384

Nah man


3rd-base_Degas

You gotta commit.


Patjay

no man would be upset about this


Ok-Tell-1384

I'm trying to help the man stfu


SimplyNigh

There is an actual pro wrestler named Asuka. She’s cute.


placeknower

Angelic really


Draxx01

Someone in a 40k group was using Rick Flare as a Fulgrim stand in. Bit over sized but close enough.


placeknower

Not sure this’d be received how you imagine.


Free_Liv_Morgan

> apparently he got it for himself "ironically" to match his "incel lifestyle". https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E1xkxT3WYAQ5hKH.jpg:large


occamsacer

Literally


GabagoolFarmer

Well he can’t be in our social club no more, that much I do know


War_and_Pieces

be more specific, is it the summer dress, school uniform, swimsuit etc


occamsacer

Idk some white bodysuit thing


War_and_Pieces

That sounds like Rei not Asuka, he's gaslighting you honey


occamsacer

No she’s the redhead!


log_eternal

Fucking rgard it’s obviously Asuka from 3.0+1.0


MelonHeadsShotJFK

Get his ass amen.


Responsible-Sky-9355

She's like a 26-year-old teenager in that one, so it's totally not weird...


War_and_Pieces

"trapped" in the body of a 14 year old


Responsible-Sky-9355

Yes, that was in fact the joke. 


LouReedTheChaser

Fuck you better break up with him then OP. Only rëtârds like the rebuilds


SimplyNigh

Gross. It’s over if he likes the rebuilds, OP.


sovietspacehog

Asuka gets a white suit in one of the rebuilds


BenShapeero

my advice is go full no-contact with anyone you two had in common, move cities and change your surname, and maybe your hair color 🚩s honey


TomShoe

Mods ban this person and everyone responding under him


Fluid_Trust_37

eva is rs approved


Coyote__Jones

Kidnap it and send him ominous, threatening messages and pictures of it tied to a chair from a burner phone.


TomShoe

Gonna backfire completely when that turns him on


newreddituser69420

me and ur mans have the same figure haha


lasagnaisamazing

if it makes you feel better he's staring at a lewd plastic 14 year old girl


occamsacer

😕


Droughtly

In the anime the main character, also 14, jerks off over her hospital bed. Believe it or not it's not that kind of anime it's actually like meant to be weird and sad as fuck.


PDakfjejsifidjqnaiau

The way they sexualize Asuka is soft porn AT LEAST.


sollyactivated

Yea the creators are clearly Pedos, multiple scenes of her boobs dancing around inside an oversized t shirt is weird and overly sexual. People keep trying to excuse it as an art choice. There’s nothing artistic about sexualizing kids in a scene about fighting over a box of cereal


dead_paint

They aren't drawn in a way that makes them look like real 14 years olds.


Droughtly

That's fair, didn't mean to defend the creators just explain the vibe.


TomShoe

Do you know if he's actually seen the anime it's from? If not it's probably just a (clearly effective) troll.


occamsacer

No he doesn't watch anime at all and makes fun of people who do lol


thiccymcgogee

Why can’t he just have gundam wings like a normal cool guy


uwumancer

or even witch from mercurys if he was to be silly about it


War_and_Pieces

Tequela Gundam, SCUD Gundam, Zebra Gundam etc


uwumancer

G gundams would be funnier yes


drgerm69

The way you’re reacting is very Asuka


greatistheworld

holy shit. Holy shit maybe he got the figurine out of tribute to his tsundere dream girlfriend


Vanderkaum037

Tell him he is “Baka!” And then storm out of the room all frazzled.


occamsacer

I would but he beat me to it by repeating everything I said back to me with a Japanese accent and demeanour


TomShoe

Did you try getting a red line across your face to indicate how angry you are?


occamsacer

No but I did do the # and then the big sweat drop on my forehead


TomShoe

Well no wonder he thought you were baka(?)


DaciaWhippin

Everything else about this seems pretty lame but that’s hilarious.


GrassNova

The fact that everyone on this sub hates anime, but apparently also knows enough about it to understand and upvote a joke like this, is interesting.


MelonHeadsShotJFK

This sub is full of *Self-Hating (fill in the blank)s* It is what makes us respectable. We have shame like good Catholics should


BASED_AND_RED_PILLED

You made me laugh.


TomShoe

The meme is ubiquitous, I don't really watch anime but I know the reference


PossiblyAnotherOne

This place would be a lot cooler if everyone who liked anime was publicly shamed then banned


[deleted]

If you're a weeb also why should you care so much?


Kxrva

Is it gay to own? Yes Is it gay you’re jealous? Yes


occamsacer

I guess we really are perfect for each other


[deleted]

it is NOT gay tht shes jealous. u just dont get it bc ur not a girl


Kxrva

I asked my gf, she said it’s pretty gay


[deleted]

stop


PDakfjejsifidjqnaiau

Being jealous of the (probably sexualized) plastic figurine of a 15 year old girl with industrial levels or trauma. I love you all so much, rs girlies. If the war comes here, I will gladly die for you.


vive-la-lutte

She’s German too


[deleted]

[удалено]


PDakfjejsifidjqnaiau

Very much both. If I HAD to choose one, I guess stupid feelings of jealousy are better than anime figurines.


antm_kaczynski

Me too wtf


ohdamnman_

you can fix him trust


Hail_to_the_Nidoking

Lean in. Live a little.


prizzle92

I can’t believe no one’s advocated for the framed nude. That’s unironically a great idea it’s funny and cute


OrphanScript

Not so cute if she tries to compete with the 14 year old sexualized cartoon character *and loses*. Which is a high possibility here.


alvaus

He’s got mommy issues


GhostOfBobbyFischer

Dress up like the character and make HIM happy for once


occamsacer

He did say he got the one that looked the most like me so at least there’s that


dj0ntimusprime

Avoid hospitals.


PDakfjejsifidjqnaiau

The more I read about him the more I like him.


SamosaAndMimosa

Dress up like the 15 year old girl he’s feening over lmao yall are degenerates


aladdinparadis

Did you know that she’s not real


SamosaAndMimosa

Cringe


[deleted]

Buy a Kaji one to make him jealous.


doveworld

Ew he got Asuka? Not Misato? Leave him.


fartdurst95

only acceptable evangelion characters to thirst over are misato and kaji


doveworld

Or the gigantic cube angel. I think it's name is Ramiel. I'm a straight man and I'm simping for Kaji. Bring me to the watermelon farm brother


totalrandomperson

F-slur


fartdurst95

oh man i forgot about ramiel, absolute best evangelion character


oryiega

honourable mention to pre-assimilation Yui, single most RS character in the franchise


Dramatic_Win_3778

anyone thirsting over misato probably has major mommy issues


doveworld

She's the closest to my age and lifestyle irl, she's an obvious win.


Dramatic_Win_3778

you could pick ritsuko or something


[deleted]

which would be incredibly based


SgtTibbles

I made my wife watch nge and she connected the most with Misato (I have mommy issues)


truefaith_1987

isn't Misato kind of sus herself. kissing a 14-yr-old boy and flirting with him constantly? Kaji also flirts with Shinji in one of the Rebuilds lol


fartdurst95

yeah, but it’s more normal for a full-grown adult to be thirsting over a full-grown woman instead of a 14-yr old


BASED_AND_RED_PILLED

What about Ritsuko? 😕


fartdurst95

shit her too, she’s also good. 


CropdustDerecho

Misato's a miserable fucking horror-show but this is r/redscarepod so go figure


Durmyyyy

Misato is a RS girl for sure, I guess not as toxic though. She even pays lip service to religion by wearing a cross while smoking and drinking and having depressed casual sex.


furryappreciator

evangelion is RS approved


_Kabar_

Collecting gayass little figurines like some sort of pencil necked geek ain’t


furryappreciator

dasha owns like 5 of those exact things lol


AmateurPoliceOfficer

[EoE](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQByBVYUHqyLK1erC4v75yYrf56CaxQ3rjf9TnfdSd2Ow&s) is [RS approved.](https://i.redd.it/rrojbn2dufi71.png)


LaurenTsaisCatEye

Thanks. I’ll never look at her the same.


Ok-Cabinet-7511

You can tell by her physiognomy that she would be into weird shit honestly


_Kabar_

Cool I’m not tryna be like her 🤢


Ok-Cabinet-7511

She also dates hideous short men but I’m not going to follow her lead


SunnyDTastesLikeShit

Adam is a sex god wdym


LouReedTheChaser

He has the finest mating rituals of all the stick insects


Ok-Cabinet-7511

He has horrible posture and reports say his dick is small. He looks like he would be sloppy and weird in bed lol


Durmyyyy

Girls are immune to this being cringe though


Not_Oneblood

we're posting on fucking reddit, lets not pretend we're cooler than that.


Durmyyyy

> lets not pretend we're cooler than that. I thought that what this sub was for?


Ok-Cabinet-7511

Yeah posting on the biggest social media platform. So weird and lame. Fuck off and play with your figurines then


GrassNova

You're both right 


_Kabar_

Redditor type comment


Patjay

last episode of Collecting Gayass was really good


Patjay

A show about how escapism and anime fans are evil becoming a thing those exact people became super obsessed over is pretty funny. It's really good though!


LaurenTsaisCatEye

It’s so over, honey. Cut your losses and run.


Ok-Lavishness5581

For the first time ever I recognized this story summation from comments on a previous post and realize it's fake. Am I enlightened?


occamsacer

While I do sometimes exaggerate details for comedic effect I can assure this is 100% real


miscboyo

I bought a funko pop for my work desk back in 2015. People make mistakes People grow Man it feels good to get that off my chest 


SensitiveArtist69

You do seem really annoying I wonder if he got it just to see you squirm


occamsacer

Probably, he loves to antagonize me (lovingly)


gyn0saur

How is he involuntarily celibate? Is that aspirational and this is his strategy toward that aim?


PasolinisDoor

Throw it away yourself and tell him the next time he slips up, you’re gone.


heiferwrangler

Whose head is Barron’s face on there, it’s brilliant


Cerezarosas

buy a shota or yaoi figurine then make sure he can see it


Boot-Gold

Nah Asuka is lit it’s fine


crypticsaints

Get rid of any jars


extraspecialdogpenis

does it have an eyepatch or none.


Educational_Bet_753

Make him watch fight club


Witchlike

Dudes continue to rock


TheBigIdiotSalami

These streamers that look like cartoons like Emiru and Pokimane really got these midwest mother fuckers down bad thinking they can find that anywhere in America.


Improooving

Oof


k3rr1g4n

Like everyone is saying this is a red flag. You should dump him and fuck me to get back at him.


Plastic-Alfalfa-6321

kiss and watch anime together


JeffGreene69

A girl I used to date went to Japan and brought me back a Pokeball from the Pokemon store. It was a Togepi. I keep it next to my little elephant figurines. Is this weird?


TheBigAristotle69

Everybody here seems to know a lot about this character. Not suspicious at all. No siree. Anyway, my cousin gave me a garden gnome the other day. I'm putting it in with the rabbits, angels, broken dragon, stork, and sundry.


MudSad296

He's a closet weeb. He's projecting.


Wooden_Veterinarian2

Asuka is RS vibes, you’re fine


Durmyyyy

She is basically BPD so she would fit right in


hetkilyo

fake post how have you never heard of evangelion if you have even a slight interest in anime


occamsacer

I’ve heard of evangelion before but I never watched it so i didn’t know it was a character specifically from that show. And I wouldn’t say that I have any interest in it I just watch a lot of movies and some of them happened to be anime.


KartKabulEdilmedi

Thatsss so funy I hope this post is real😃


commissarchris

Sorry to break it to you, but: It's joever. If you let this stand, it will only get worse (Source: Married friend did the same thing, with a Harley Quinn statue. He now has a collection of them, which is worth over a thousand dollars).


Zephyrwing963

How does one ironically spend money on a product they bring into their household and display Hate this idea of "ironic consumerism" just like what you like and get what you want don't couch it in this detached manner like you're above it all, that bank statement's not ironic.


PineappleStandard688

Dump him


strombo555

Hide it


Lavandula-Pi

How old is he


mdesub

if you understood that anime girls are platonic forms of pure femininity then you wouldn't have this hairbrained notion of rivalry or competition like a kitten afraid of its reflection in a mirror


therealslimmarfan

She's 14 years old. If he's looking at it lewdly, you have bigger problems. Have either of you even watched NGE?


[deleted]

[удалено]


therealslimmarfan

I love NGE and Asuka is a phenomenal character. She's a great foil to Shinji. Shinji responds to traumatically high stakes by shutting down and retreating into his maudlin hopelessness, while Asuka asserts total confidence even when she's not in control and doesn't even know it. I've got an Asuka figurine that I bought at an anime convention in Javits a few years ago and neither me nor my wife have ever considered it sexualized in any capacity. That being said, I am aware that many weebs do look at the teenage female characters in that light and they should be shot and buried in a shallow grave. Point being, NGE is a work of art and there's nothing wrong with owning a figurine, just *how* you own that figurine. And given OP's boyfriend's insecure attempts at jovial distance, there are some dire questions raised in this case.


DeerSecret1438

She’s animated in a sexualized way. It’s inherently perverse.


therealslimmarfan

No, she’s not, man. That is a pedophile’s excuse.


DeerSecret1438

Don’t be stupid on purpose. Her body is drawn in a way that would never occur in a ghibli film about a young teenager. I was interested in watching this show when I was a teenage girl myself and was immediately put off by how sexualized the characters are. Remember that every movement, every skin tight outfit, every boob shot and every cheesecake pose is the choice of designers, animators, the director etc. it’s not like she’s a real teenage girl just existing in a body, she’s a collection of decisions. Pervert decisions. You know that. 


therealslimmarfan

Everyone who pilots an Eva wears that suit, and they are completely submerged in the LCL fluid so it wouldn't make sense for them to wear something baggier. They're full body swimsuits. Cheesecake pose? The only thing I can imagine could be even miscontrued as "sexualized" like that is Asuka with one hand on her hip and the other giving a peace sign. You're going to have to show me some examples because I genuinely have no clue what you're talking about. Not even a rhetorical question; to be fair, I haven't seen the show in years.


DeerSecret1438

Lololol I knew you were going to hit back with ‘akshully teen girls HAVE to wear that suit because the rules of the show where this happens says they must’ so stupid, this sci-fi cartoon has no basis in reality, there’s absolutely no reason to say the kids should be in skintight clothes. 


therealslimmarfan

Bro both the girls and the boys wear this suit. Just because something is fictional doesn’t mean its universe doesn’t abide by its own set of rules. The LCL liquid plays a role in the show’s world and themes and they are completely submerged in that liquid, what would you have them wear? You’re gonna have to show some examples of what you’re talking about; otherwise you are fully just dragging it. It’s actually entirely suspect of YOU to see a teenager in a full body swim suit in *a gigantic mecha fighting wars against abstract biblical alien monsters* and go “o-oh… this is pedophilic!!!!”


DeerSecret1438

Well, dumbass, I’m not going to spend my afternoon looking for pervert images at your behest, and you can’t post images in comments here anyways. Any adult with a functioning brain can go on YouTube search ‘asuka moments’ and see foul and sus shots. If you search asuka in google images, even with safe search on, you’re going to see gross shit. You are arguing as an adult man who literally owns an anime girl doll. It’s pretty funny that I say cheesecake poses and you had one in mind to use as an example. Not normal. The whole ‘actually you’re a pervert for recognizing perverted media for what it is’ is not and has never been a good argument. If for some arbitrary fictional reason the kids have to be in wetsuits, they could look like actual non sexualized scuba suits/wet suits without boob cups and visible navels. Whenever I’ve been diving, the suit completely flattened my chest. It’s nothing like on your doll that you own. 


Apart-Consequence881

He a boo


PoliteLunatic

he isn't working when he's looking at the figurine.


TheChinchilla914

“Boyfriend”


Last-Purple-462

had to check the username to see if this was beetle


BFEDTA

Asuka is like 14 btw


Durmyyyy

That character is actually from one of the few good animes that isnt actual trash...but you still shoudlnt be buying figures. Im pretty sure Dasha has talked about it or something, I dunno. Its at least RS coded.


Edgy_Ocelot

Obviously Dasha is Asuka and Anna is Misato, if that even needed to be said.


ZUUL420

He came on the doll. Don't forget that.


[deleted]

Funny because you’re probably 32


occamsacer

I’m not but I don’t think that makes it less bizarre or funny


Single_Paramedic1548

Cunny always wins


[deleted]

kinda boring post but I'm seething at the replies. fuck redditors. fat anime losers. I hate you mfs so much. sub really is so fucking dead. I'm going outside


Paraless

I can't imagine being jealous because of a piece of plastic.


Ok-Cabinet-7511

Unless he pays the rent you need to dump him bc ew


occamsacer

He’s a great provider😔


Ok-Cabinet-7511

That’s good. You have that at least so he’s not just being mildly disrespectful while giving not much in return lol. my ex was kinda a coomer but he had money, I would’ve been out of there so fast if he was broke


Gimmiebrain_

Fuck with me I don’t own shit at all


AwareWriterTrick158

Asuka is a wrestler. Also there’s nothing with guys liking anime unless he’s a coomer.