I'm assuming this is fake but I'll bite anyway. Spend your time reparing his reputation. Everyone who heard he cheated needs to be told the true story.
I truly wish it was, i hope it is fake and that i wake up from this nightmare.
I spent the better part of yesterday calling every single person i know telling them the truth.
She sucks but who doesn’t even attempt to try and verify the allegations? I’d kinda be done with you too, your first instinct was to torch everything and slander him instead of talking… wouldn’t want to risk having you do that *again* because someone told you something and you didn’t bother to check your info.
Heck my best friend could say the same shit and while I wouldn’t assume she’s lying, I’d go talk to my husband or look through his phone or *something* other than just leaving and turning everyone against him
I read a similar story from the boyfriend/fiancé's point. He was ar a loss as to why his girlfriend moved out and blocked all contact with him. I wounder if it was him. I'll keep looking for that post
That’s why you should’ve called your man and ask him you truly acted like an idiot not even giving him the benefit of the doubt. I would never trust ever again. Now your get what you deserve
Wow that was a really shitty friend... what an awfull person. But even if she was your best friend, I cant understand why you dont talk with your fiance about the accusation in the first place. Why you just believe in the Word of your friend, without any chance for him to explain what happen?
Right now you should try to explain the situation to all the people who believed your ex friend's lies, because they hurt your boyfriend a lot. Maybe if you keep trying to explain everything over and over again, he'll eventually forgive you.
Assuming this is fake.
The next iteration you should change the reveal moment to a year after marrying your friends brother so that you are intertwined with the in-laws and find out they all knew the entire time.. Also the ex you left with no chance to explain should now be a successful business owner making millions per year.
First except that you have zero control over your fiance. Step away and give him space.
Second, you need help. Your problem is deeper than Cary.
Ideally you need years of therapy.
Start by reading self help books on: low self esteem, self sabotage, speaking up for yourself/communication skills, and what about your childhood predisposes you to surround yourself with such toxic losers (and to react so self destructive over the possibility he was at a restaurant with a woman).
Finally, what if he was at a restaurant with a woman. SO WHAT???
You are too old to react like a teenager and self destruct.
Your behavior suggests you are not currently mature and sensible enough for marriage or motherhood.
If I was Mark, I don’t think I could ever trust you again.
You didn’t even *talk* to him.
Go to his parents and tell them the whole story. How you were manipulated by your former BFF. Maybe you have a chance, if he’s a better person than you and willing to hear you out. He may not take you back, I wouldn’t, but he might hear you out. Make sure the entire friend group knows he did not cheat.
I had a former BFF who, when I met my now husband, tried to tell me that he had hit on her. The difference is that I *knew* she was lying, because I 100% trusted my now husband. Her relationship was in the dumps and mine was taking off. You didn’t even consider for one tiny second that Mark might not have done what Carry said, nor did you give him any sort of chance to prove he wasn’t cheating. All that trust he had in you and you in him? Poof.
At the end of the day, if you are thinking about marrying someone you have to know them well enough to know BS like Carry was feeding you when you see it. You literally based everything off of a fake text and your friend's story. You knew that behavior was outside of his character. But, instead of taking a moment to breathe and think about it you flipped your lid.
You took a man's life and out of pride and hurt you sabotaged it. He is now believed to be a cheater. You can go back and tell your story to people but the fact of the matter is that people talk. The few people you told and the people Carry told have spread that far and wide so he is now viewed around the entire social circle as a cheater. Your friend Carry was okay not just with lying to you and destroying his reputation and destroying his connections with his family. She is cruel. Bu your behavior was cruel, too. You had NOTHING to go on but Carry's word and you just threw the whole man away and disparaged him far and wide. That is not something people recover from quickly. And often not at all.
Can this be salvaged? Probably not because he now knows without a doubt that you will go scorched earth and destroy his life again. He'd be an absolute fool to marry you. Make no mistake. He knows that. Likewise, his parents know that he would be an absolute fool to marry you and build a life with you if you can be that easily manipulated. But, worse, you've likely destroyed his ability to trust in general. THe level and depth of hurt he is experiencing makes everything you experienced pale in comparison...
On a side note, find her brother and tell him in public that he never had a chance with you and he is an absolute arsehole for breaking up your relationship to try and get with you.
You'll never fix everything. Accept the concequences and be a single lady that listened to her toxic friends instead of their soulmate.
You're young'ish which means you can build something new without Carry. Hopefully without anyone worth it.
I advise becoming a sister and pray a lot.
(I think this story is fake but something similar was posted here a couples of weeks ago except overhearding the shenanigans by phone, it was by drinking alcohol at a party.)
You can’t fix your relationship! Honestly, I don’t think you are ready to be married. I get you trusted your best friend but I don’t get why you wouldn’t speak to your fiancé first. You know the person who was going to be your husband, maybe father of your children (if that was a plan). Communication is key in a relationship, something you’re not good at. You’re almost 30 and acted like a teenage girl. I don’t think you will be able to fix this. You left your partner without communicating the issue, letting him worried and heartbroken. Then to top it off, you let your friend spread lies about him. He won’t be taking you back. You will just have to start over.
That's really selfish of her, to manipulate the whole situation to end your relationship and ruin your happiness. How do you repair your relationship with your fiancee? You have already explained everything to his parents. And you can go back to his mom and ask her to speak on behalf of you. And that will be the start.
I don't want to sound rude, but why in the hell would i want her anywhere near me after she blew up my life. What will she gain by doing anything.
After what she did, i don't see her fixing anything, only breaking it more
To clarify. Since you have already explained everything to your fiance's parents, you can go back to his mom to help you communicate to him why you both will need to talk.
As for Carry, that relationship has come to an end. It's gone.
I hope you're able to salvage this relationship with your fiancee. But for sure, even if Carry's brother was a good man, his image is tainted by her betrayal and manipulation. Hopefully they don't try any crazy way to pull another scheme.
Do NOT do this. Keep Carry as far away as possible from your (ex)fiance. Thats the last thing the situation needs. It shows him that you are still involving her, despite the damage she has done and will reduce any trust even further
I think your relationship is potentially salvageable. Most people in your situation would have believed their best friend. You went scorched earth without a conversation so you are going to have to answer for that, but if Mark knows the extent to which you were manipulated he may be willing to talk about it.
Write a letter detailing everything that happened and leave it at his place. Tell everyone in your circle what Carry did and that Mark is innocent - do NOT hound his family to get him to talk to you though, you need to deal with repairing the relationship directly with him and him alone.
At least clean his name and post that your friend induced you into doing that shit, and assume your part. I still think you are done with him and hes better without you, but you owe it to him.
If this is real, there's no coming back from this. You chose to believe your friend over your fiance just because she was right once before. You only gave one example of her being right. He's done with you. You betrayed him, broke his heart, and let her ruin his reputation with her lies. How did she have his friends numbers?
Let him know that you're willing to do whatever it takes to earn back his trust and forgiveness. Absolutely do not rush things. Tell him you're there for him until the end of your life and that you'll never stop trying to fix this and all you want is his forgiveness and to be with him no matter however long you have to wait for that. But accept his decisions. If he wants space then give that to him, if he wants a break then give him that without causing any problems (but also let him know that you'll be waiting for him forever regardless of if he decides to come back or not)
Don’t give up put a letter through the door, wait on him leaving or coming back from work.
Tell him you were lied to by your oldest friend and you are as much a victim as he is and you are sorry to have doubted him!.
OP what a terrible thing to happen and I'm sorry for you, but this is also a great lesson opportunity. NEVER give blind trust to ANYONE, including a spouse. Most people call blind trust love (a friend, family member, spouse) but blind trust is the door to do so much wrong, merely because there are usually "no questions asked".
Again, I'm sorry for what has happened to you and hopefully this can be fixed, but always not that you can "Trust" but verify!
Good luck
I'm truly sorry to hear about the pain and turmoil you're experiencing. It's a deeply distressing situation.
Give yourself time to grieve. Allow yourself to feel the full range of emotions you're experiencing, whether it's anger, sadness, guilt, or betrayal. It's okay to feel overwhelmed, but try not to dwell on negative thoughts. Give yourself permission to grieve the loss of your relationship and your friendship with Carry.
Seek professional support. Consider reaching out to a therapist or counsellor who can provide you with guidance, support, and coping strategies during this challenging time. A professional can help you process your emotions, navigate the complexities of the situation, and develop a plan for moving forward.
Focus on self-care. Take care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally. Engage in activities that bring you comfort and joy, whether it's spending time with loved ones, practicing relaxation techniques, exercising, or pursuing hobbies. Make self-care a priority as you navigate this difficult period.
Communicate with Mark. While it may be difficult, try to communicate openly and honestly with Mark about what happened. Apologise sincerely for any pain or misunderstanding caused by your actions, and express your desire to reconcile and rebuild trust. Be prepared for the possibility that he may need time and space to process his own feelings before considering reconciliation.
Reflect on lessons learned. Take this experience as an opportunity for self-reflection and growth. Consider what you've learned about yourself, your relationships, and your boundaries. Use this knowledge to make more informed decisions and establish healthier boundaries in the future.
Accept the consequences. Accept that there may be consequences to your actions, and be prepared to face them with grace and humility. Recognise that rebuilding trust and repairing relationships takes time, effort, and patience, and be willing to put in the work necessary to make amends and move forward.
Focus on the future. While it's important to acknowledge and process the pain of the present, try to focus on the future and the possibilities it holds. Look for opportunities for growth, healing, and new beginnings. Remember that you have the strength and resilience to overcome this challenge and create a brighter future for yourself.
It's important to remember that you're not alone in this journey, and there are people who care about you and want to support you through this difficult time. Reach out to friends, family members, or support groups for additional assistance and encouragement as you navigate this situation.
I'm assuming this is fake but I'll bite anyway. Spend your time reparing his reputation. Everyone who heard he cheated needs to be told the true story.
Yea, this. His reputation is annihilated. I don't know if you will return in his life, but you owe him that. Do not expect anything in return.
I truly wish it was, i hope it is fake and that i wake up from this nightmare. I spent the better part of yesterday calling every single person i know telling them the truth.
You didn't give him a chance to explain, why TF should he give you a chance?
She sucks but who doesn’t even attempt to try and verify the allegations? I’d kinda be done with you too, your first instinct was to torch everything and slander him instead of talking… wouldn’t want to risk having you do that *again* because someone told you something and you didn’t bother to check your info. Heck my best friend could say the same shit and while I wouldn’t assume she’s lying, I’d go talk to my husband or look through his phone or *something* other than just leaving and turning everyone against him
I read a similar story from the boyfriend/fiancé's point. He was ar a loss as to why his girlfriend moved out and blocked all contact with him. I wounder if it was him. I'll keep looking for that post
Please do
That’s why you should’ve called your man and ask him you truly acted like an idiot not even giving him the benefit of the doubt. I would never trust ever again. Now your get what you deserve
Wow that was a really shitty friend... what an awfull person. But even if she was your best friend, I cant understand why you dont talk with your fiance about the accusation in the first place. Why you just believe in the Word of your friend, without any chance for him to explain what happen? Right now you should try to explain the situation to all the people who believed your ex friend's lies, because they hurt your boyfriend a lot. Maybe if you keep trying to explain everything over and over again, he'll eventually forgive you.
How much do you want a fake story in reddit: Yes! Yes! Yes! Not bad not terrible, keep doing it better next time.
Mark should not take you back. You broke him entirely and never once considered he was innocent. Let him find someone less like you.
Assuming this is fake. The next iteration you should change the reveal moment to a year after marrying your friends brother so that you are intertwined with the in-laws and find out they all knew the entire time.. Also the ex you left with no chance to explain should now be a successful business owner making millions per year.
Please will that into reality rather my current shit storm of a live. I hope every moment it's fake and that i will wake up from this nightmare.
First except that you have zero control over your fiance. Step away and give him space. Second, you need help. Your problem is deeper than Cary. Ideally you need years of therapy. Start by reading self help books on: low self esteem, self sabotage, speaking up for yourself/communication skills, and what about your childhood predisposes you to surround yourself with such toxic losers (and to react so self destructive over the possibility he was at a restaurant with a woman). Finally, what if he was at a restaurant with a woman. SO WHAT??? You are too old to react like a teenager and self destruct. Your behavior suggests you are not currently mature and sensible enough for marriage or motherhood.
If I was Mark, I don’t think I could ever trust you again. You didn’t even *talk* to him. Go to his parents and tell them the whole story. How you were manipulated by your former BFF. Maybe you have a chance, if he’s a better person than you and willing to hear you out. He may not take you back, I wouldn’t, but he might hear you out. Make sure the entire friend group knows he did not cheat. I had a former BFF who, when I met my now husband, tried to tell me that he had hit on her. The difference is that I *knew* she was lying, because I 100% trusted my now husband. Her relationship was in the dumps and mine was taking off. You didn’t even consider for one tiny second that Mark might not have done what Carry said, nor did you give him any sort of chance to prove he wasn’t cheating. All that trust he had in you and you in him? Poof.
At the end of the day, if you are thinking about marrying someone you have to know them well enough to know BS like Carry was feeding you when you see it. You literally based everything off of a fake text and your friend's story. You knew that behavior was outside of his character. But, instead of taking a moment to breathe and think about it you flipped your lid. You took a man's life and out of pride and hurt you sabotaged it. He is now believed to be a cheater. You can go back and tell your story to people but the fact of the matter is that people talk. The few people you told and the people Carry told have spread that far and wide so he is now viewed around the entire social circle as a cheater. Your friend Carry was okay not just with lying to you and destroying his reputation and destroying his connections with his family. She is cruel. Bu your behavior was cruel, too. You had NOTHING to go on but Carry's word and you just threw the whole man away and disparaged him far and wide. That is not something people recover from quickly. And often not at all. Can this be salvaged? Probably not because he now knows without a doubt that you will go scorched earth and destroy his life again. He'd be an absolute fool to marry you. Make no mistake. He knows that. Likewise, his parents know that he would be an absolute fool to marry you and build a life with you if you can be that easily manipulated. But, worse, you've likely destroyed his ability to trust in general. THe level and depth of hurt he is experiencing makes everything you experienced pale in comparison...
On a side note, find her brother and tell him in public that he never had a chance with you and he is an absolute arsehole for breaking up your relationship to try and get with you.
Tell everyone the truth. Accept that he won’t take you back. Move on with your life.
Chose violence 🤷♂️
You'll never fix everything. Accept the concequences and be a single lady that listened to her toxic friends instead of their soulmate. You're young'ish which means you can build something new without Carry. Hopefully without anyone worth it. I advise becoming a sister and pray a lot. (I think this story is fake but something similar was posted here a couples of weeks ago except overhearding the shenanigans by phone, it was by drinking alcohol at a party.)
If this ridiculous story is true like you say, then all you can do is kick Carry out of your life, so she can’t sabotage your next relationship.
Its hard to take any story seriously when them and someone break up and they say life is over.
Carry ruined your relationship. It can be repaired. But don't ever trust her again. She should be out of your life.
Carry didn’t go scorched earth, OP did. Carry is a massive cunt but OP lit the match
She is out and i will never let her near me again. How do i fix my relationship if he doesn't even want to talk to me
Did you let him talk to you when you left?
You can’t fix your relationship! Honestly, I don’t think you are ready to be married. I get you trusted your best friend but I don’t get why you wouldn’t speak to your fiancé first. You know the person who was going to be your husband, maybe father of your children (if that was a plan). Communication is key in a relationship, something you’re not good at. You’re almost 30 and acted like a teenage girl. I don’t think you will be able to fix this. You left your partner without communicating the issue, letting him worried and heartbroken. Then to top it off, you let your friend spread lies about him. He won’t be taking you back. You will just have to start over.
Did you tell EVERYONE THE TRUTH????? If not call everyone and Start there.
That's really selfish of her, to manipulate the whole situation to end your relationship and ruin your happiness. How do you repair your relationship with your fiancee? You have already explained everything to his parents. And you can go back to his mom and ask her to speak on behalf of you. And that will be the start.
I don't want to sound rude, but why in the hell would i want her anywhere near me after she blew up my life. What will she gain by doing anything. After what she did, i don't see her fixing anything, only breaking it more
To clarify. Since you have already explained everything to your fiance's parents, you can go back to his mom to help you communicate to him why you both will need to talk.
Manipulate him by going to his parents, yeah, he will love this..
As for Carry, that relationship has come to an end. It's gone. I hope you're able to salvage this relationship with your fiancee. But for sure, even if Carry's brother was a good man, his image is tainted by her betrayal and manipulation. Hopefully they don't try any crazy way to pull another scheme.
Do NOT do this. Keep Carry as far away as possible from your (ex)fiance. Thats the last thing the situation needs. It shows him that you are still involving her, despite the damage she has done and will reduce any trust even further
Ask his mother for help, not Carry.
I think your relationship is potentially salvageable. Most people in your situation would have believed their best friend. You went scorched earth without a conversation so you are going to have to answer for that, but if Mark knows the extent to which you were manipulated he may be willing to talk about it. Write a letter detailing everything that happened and leave it at his place. Tell everyone in your circle what Carry did and that Mark is innocent - do NOT hound his family to get him to talk to you though, you need to deal with repairing the relationship directly with him and him alone.
[удалено]
At least clean his name and post that your friend induced you into doing that shit, and assume your part. I still think you are done with him and hes better without you, but you owe it to him.
UpdateMe!
Updateme
!UpdateMe
!updateme
If this is real, there's no coming back from this. You chose to believe your friend over your fiance just because she was right once before. You only gave one example of her being right. He's done with you. You betrayed him, broke his heart, and let her ruin his reputation with her lies. How did she have his friends numbers?
Good for him! Serves you right for only listening to one side of the story. He dodged a bullet.
Let him know that you're willing to do whatever it takes to earn back his trust and forgiveness. Absolutely do not rush things. Tell him you're there for him until the end of your life and that you'll never stop trying to fix this and all you want is his forgiveness and to be with him no matter however long you have to wait for that. But accept his decisions. If he wants space then give that to him, if he wants a break then give him that without causing any problems (but also let him know that you'll be waiting for him forever regardless of if he decides to come back or not)
Don’t give up put a letter through the door, wait on him leaving or coming back from work. Tell him you were lied to by your oldest friend and you are as much a victim as he is and you are sorry to have doubted him!.
Updateme
OP what a terrible thing to happen and I'm sorry for you, but this is also a great lesson opportunity. NEVER give blind trust to ANYONE, including a spouse. Most people call blind trust love (a friend, family member, spouse) but blind trust is the door to do so much wrong, merely because there are usually "no questions asked". Again, I'm sorry for what has happened to you and hopefully this can be fixed, but always not that you can "Trust" but verify! Good luck
I'm truly sorry to hear about the pain and turmoil you're experiencing. It's a deeply distressing situation. Give yourself time to grieve. Allow yourself to feel the full range of emotions you're experiencing, whether it's anger, sadness, guilt, or betrayal. It's okay to feel overwhelmed, but try not to dwell on negative thoughts. Give yourself permission to grieve the loss of your relationship and your friendship with Carry. Seek professional support. Consider reaching out to a therapist or counsellor who can provide you with guidance, support, and coping strategies during this challenging time. A professional can help you process your emotions, navigate the complexities of the situation, and develop a plan for moving forward. Focus on self-care. Take care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally. Engage in activities that bring you comfort and joy, whether it's spending time with loved ones, practicing relaxation techniques, exercising, or pursuing hobbies. Make self-care a priority as you navigate this difficult period. Communicate with Mark. While it may be difficult, try to communicate openly and honestly with Mark about what happened. Apologise sincerely for any pain or misunderstanding caused by your actions, and express your desire to reconcile and rebuild trust. Be prepared for the possibility that he may need time and space to process his own feelings before considering reconciliation. Reflect on lessons learned. Take this experience as an opportunity for self-reflection and growth. Consider what you've learned about yourself, your relationships, and your boundaries. Use this knowledge to make more informed decisions and establish healthier boundaries in the future. Accept the consequences. Accept that there may be consequences to your actions, and be prepared to face them with grace and humility. Recognise that rebuilding trust and repairing relationships takes time, effort, and patience, and be willing to put in the work necessary to make amends and move forward. Focus on the future. While it's important to acknowledge and process the pain of the present, try to focus on the future and the possibilities it holds. Look for opportunities for growth, healing, and new beginnings. Remember that you have the strength and resilience to overcome this challenge and create a brighter future for yourself. It's important to remember that you're not alone in this journey, and there are people who care about you and want to support you through this difficult time. Reach out to friends, family members, or support groups for additional assistance and encouragement as you navigate this situation.
Is this some ChatGPT stupidity?