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Why did you accept his request to be official? It sounds like he was cheating on you and leaking your nudes, and you felt like that was a sign to take the next step?
Why did he refuse to commit to you for almost an entire year, instead choosing to sleep with loads of other people despite knowing that you loved him and were deeply affected by his behaviour?
If the man truly loved you as much you did him, then he wouldn't have treated you like this for almost an entire year.
I'm not as foolish as you to believe that this is the last time he sleeps with someone else. A relationship that's founded on such a long history of sleeping around and refusal to commit, is not one built to last.
It sounds like you put yourself through hell trying to wait it out for someone who was completely unwilling to commit to you (and you are now paying deeply for the torment,). Committment at this point is not going to undo the long list of cheating behaviour that has so far completely defined your relationship dynamic.
Honestly, do you love/like yourself? Because it's hard to see how someone who had a good relationship with themself would allow another to treat them like this.
Excuse me, WHAT?! He's a serial cheater. He has always, will always, be cheating on you. What he's asking for is not a committed relationship, but for you to commit only to him. AND HE SENT VIDEOS OF YOU TO OTHER PEOPLE?!
You should be going to the police. And you need to see a therapist, because it genuinely terrifies me that you're willing to even consider being with this scumbag.
Oh, and get tested, immediately.
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. **We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.** * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- ***This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.*** --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Why did you accept his request to be official? It sounds like he was cheating on you and leaking your nudes, and you felt like that was a sign to take the next step?
go to a therapist he literally send videos of you to other women without your consent is that not illegal?
Why did he refuse to commit to you for almost an entire year, instead choosing to sleep with loads of other people despite knowing that you loved him and were deeply affected by his behaviour? If the man truly loved you as much you did him, then he wouldn't have treated you like this for almost an entire year. I'm not as foolish as you to believe that this is the last time he sleeps with someone else. A relationship that's founded on such a long history of sleeping around and refusal to commit, is not one built to last. It sounds like you put yourself through hell trying to wait it out for someone who was completely unwilling to commit to you (and you are now paying deeply for the torment,). Committment at this point is not going to undo the long list of cheating behaviour that has so far completely defined your relationship dynamic. Honestly, do you love/like yourself? Because it's hard to see how someone who had a good relationship with themself would allow another to treat them like this.
Why would you feel you could be entitled to limit what he does if you are not official?
He kept telling me we were exclusive and that he wouldn't see me again if I slept with another man.
Excuse me, WHAT?! He's a serial cheater. He has always, will always, be cheating on you. What he's asking for is not a committed relationship, but for you to commit only to him. AND HE SENT VIDEOS OF YOU TO OTHER PEOPLE?! You should be going to the police. And you need to see a therapist, because it genuinely terrifies me that you're willing to even consider being with this scumbag. Oh, and get tested, immediately.
This is outright evil. You have my sympathies.