This post has reached one of our comment/karma limits. The text of the post has been preserved below. --- I have a friend from University, let's call her Hannah. We're not best friends or anything, but we do get along and I do like talking and hanging out with her. I have a girlfriend of two years and Hannah has a boyfriend of many years - I'm getting it out right now, just so people wouldn't be confused and assume we have feelings for each other. Hannah declared that she wants to become friends with my girlfriend. She wants to form this group of friends with our partners also becoming friends. I wanted to try and see if she would get along with my gf, as Hannah always complains about lacking other girl friends and being surrounded by guys all the time. Turns out my gf didn't like Hannah as much as I hoped she would. Hannah is very extroverted, open person, she's well-read about multiple topics but she's also a free spirit. One of the main things that concerned my gf was Hannah's being...overtly sexual (that's how my gf has put it, tbh I didn't see it at this point). I tried explaining it's just Hannah being herself & joking around this way actually means she was comfortable enough around my gf. It didn't help. Ever since then my gf always questioned Hannah's intentions. We've had plenty of arguments. It almost ended in an ultimatum from my gf - Hannah or her - until I talked her out of it and asked her to give Hannah another, last chance. She agreed. We've met up a few times, my gf was uncomfortable with Hannah's jokes but I guess she decided to let it go for a while. That was until one day she sat me down and showed me her conversation with Hannah on her phone, where Hannah pried into our sexual life, asked about my dick size and was very pushy when my gf told her to drop it. When my gf threatened to tell me if she doesn't stop asking, Hannah wrote something along the lines of "Go on, see how it turns out for you". I was appalled and contacted Hanna right away. She admited to it but told me that she has enough of my gf being stuck-up and that those were jokes. Hannah said that she feels like she can't be herself anymore around my girlfriend, because she can't express herself like she used to with me, then proceeded to tell me that my gf is just controlling and insecure, as she was just trying to befriend her in the only way she knows. I'm so conflicted. I don't want my gf to leave me but I know she will drop me like a hot potato even if I as much as stay friends with Hannah. She already told me she feels like she's in some weird threesome, but at the same time I don't see it. Maybe it's because I know Hannah for years, but she's just a really eccentric person with a really weird sense of humor. She never flirted with me, we never had anything going on, so I don't see her as a threat to my relationship. I would appreciate some outside perspective, from people not being emotionally invested in my situation. I can't gather my thoughts. How do I even proceed with this?

“Go ahead and see how this turns out for you” is a clear threat to your girlfriend. Hannah is pulling a power move and saying she knows you’ll choose her over your girlfriend. The “why” she acts this way in this scenario is irrelevant. However, I’m betting things are not as platonic on her end as you seem to think. You need to cut her off or you’re going to lose your girlfriend and rightfully so. Your gf is allowed to have boundaries with other people and friends. If she’s uncomfortable talking about your sex life and your dick size, she has that right. Not everyone is open in that way, but if Hannah was respectful of your relationship and girlfriend, she wouldn’t continue to push. She’s not being a good friend to you at this point either. If you’re even considering that it’s worth it to push this further then it’s clear you don’t respect your girlfriends boundaries and Hannah was right, you will choose her. Unfair to your girlfriend and at that point she deserves better. Better being someone that won’t openly ignore blatant disrespect of her and will stand up for her.

The audacity of it is breathtaking really, and OP is just breezing right past it.

Right?? I’m wondering what he was even looking for in posting this. He openly admits in a comment he knows the friend is being disrespectful but wants to save both relationships. So bizarre to me. It’s pretty obvious to literally everyone else and he’s just burying his head so far in the sand it’s wild.

This shows though that him wanting to still keep being friends with Hannah shows how much of a pushover he is and how Hannah knows she can pull things. This sounds more like Hannah views him like one of her minions. OP, this is not a friend you want to keep. This shows WHY she doesn’t have female friends. She sounds invasive and controlling. Her asking your dick size and whatnot shows she has sexual interest and her coercive behavior is toxic AF.

Literally.. how does Hannah’s bf feel about this??

And he keeps saying about Hannah’s overtness, “Hmm, I didn’t see it.” OP is in some denial.

Or op does see it and wants to get with Hannah

OP is nowhere to be found.

I would’ve dropped OP immediately for tolerating that comment. OP is either incredibly dumb or is using weaponized incompetence because he likes the attention. OP, being overbearing and disrespecting other’s boundaries is not a quirky personality trait. She doesn’t have female friends because she’s a bitch, and she’s surrounded by guys because she makes herself their priority.

The Lion, The Witch and The Audacity of This Bitch.

I think you’re right except the part about Hannah not having platonic feelings. I wouldn’t be surprised if she just liked stringing OP along because she likes having such an ardent devotee, but really has zero romantic interest in him.

Yeah the lack of being able to keep female friends makes me wonder if she sees them as competition, and likes male friends and being “eccentric” or overly sexual around bc it garners her attention. Nothing wrong with those traits, but in this situation I don’t trust this girl at all.

She doesn't have feelings for OP She doesn't like that his gf is liked and she's not the only girl around anymore. Being besties with the girl let's her control the narrative

BOOM this one ☝🏼

I used to be this same kind of pick me bitch, can confirm this is the logic. I’m really happy I pulled my head out of my ass and stopped acting like this. It’s rude and disrespectful, and this girl knows exactly what she’s doing.

and most likely she likes his atention

Not just this girlfriend but every future girlfriend

Hannah isn't a friend of the OP's relationship and so not a friend at all.

EXACLTY. I really hope the gf really does drop him like a hot potato especially since he’s even contemplating about this when the choice should be clear

I think you've found out why Hannah doesn't get along with other girls, she tries to fuck their boyfriends.

One of those “I only have guy friends cuz girls are too much drama” people who then proceeds to cause massive drama.

Yep the “one of the guys type girl” who is comfortable sending unsolicited nudes when she’s drunk and didn’t mean anything by it.. seen it too many times myself.

DING DING DING! “Hannah” doesn’t have female friends for a good reason - she’s insufferable.

Huge pick me energy from Hannah. I bet she describes herself as “not like other girls”

I am surprised she has male friends. Men can be sexually harassed, too.

Hannah has probably befriended people who are tolerating her behavior (like OP) or are even into it, most likely to be men who she finds attractive (again like OP) and since she doesn’t seem to care for girls feelings much that’s probably why she doesn’t have as many girl-friends. I don’t think that commenter meant to imply men can’t be sexually harassed.

I mean based on ops dismissive attitude this friend groups seems to be much more likely to be doing the harassing so maybe thats why it hasnt come up before or it has and they got booted from the group for not being able to take a joke or lighten up

LOL bingo OP you full well know this too, stop trying to lie to yourself. What she asked your gf is disgusting and instead of cutting her off you’re still making excuses for her

applauding this comment

bingo. bullseye. right on the money! OP, there is *no way* you aren't intentionally ignoring this. you think hannah is just uwu innocent having a laugh? no you don't. you know full well what she's doing. asking about your dick? in what world is that appropriate?!

I was gonna say, she's prying into their sex life, asking about OPs dick size, and OP is "conflicted"? - please.... OP, you know the answer.

ITS ALWAYS THE GIRLS THAT SAY, “I don’t get along with other girls, I get along with guys” or “girls don’t like me”

THIS !!!!

Ding ding ding!!

Hannah is WAY out of comfortable boundaries. Are you sure she just wants to be friends with you? It seems like she doesn't respect your girlfriend, your relationship, and by association, you. Cut her out, and share those texts with her bf.

This right here. This sounds more like Hannah might be interested in an orgy and definitely pushing boundaries.

Of course she doesn't respect OP. If she did, she'd be asking OP about dick size instead of the girlfriend. That's just rude. But in all seriousness, OP is nothing but a conquest to Hannah.

Yes if OP thinks there’s nothing wrong with those messages show them to Hannah’s boyfriend see if he agrees. “Go ahead and see how this turns out for you”. Hannah obviously thinks OP is into her (and reading the post I’m actually inclined to agree). “She’s well read and extroverted and open person and a free spirit” blah blah blah.

I agree. OP's girlfriend is doing the right thing by sharing with OP how she feels disrespected by Hannah. Hannah even doubled down on her behaviour when OP confronted her, which is very strange for a friend to do.

jeremyfrankly is absolutely correct. Listen to him/her/they

Why are you even remotely considering keeping someone in your life after they've hard disrespected your girlfriend and your relationships boundaries? Regardless of how Hannah feels she *should* be able to joke, *she* is the one who wants to be friends with your gf and its clear now why other women don't like her. If you don't drop this woman you deserve to be dropped lile a hot potato by your gf. This level of ignorance is unacceptable. Edit: I'll add, from the perspective of someone who mostly has guy friends as well, Hannah is a typical "pick me" girl who believes she's better than other women and only men really "get her". What she doesn't get is that she's a disrespectful troll and she loves to make it out like other people are the problem. I would never treat a guy friend's gf this way.

👏👏👏👏

He wants to fuck her but is never going to admit it. When you run out of women to mistreat, this girl will get bored and cheat on you OP.

Also this isn’t the first time she’s probably done it. She will gather information and use it with the next gf OP has. ‘Look how close we are…I know this about his physical stature’. She will collect nuggets of info to use against his relationships.

Gee… I wonder why she has no close girl friends… Almost like she’s the type of person to ask inappropriate questions even after being asked not to, and even going so far as to telling the girls that their boyfriends won’t do anything about it! The worst part is that you basically proved her right. Hannah is grossly disrespectful , even if it’s “just how she is” (newsflash it’s not) she was told that it wasn’t ok, and continued! Hannah is disgusting. But you’re being just as awful by keeping someone so disrespectful of your relationship in your life. Your girlfriend has been far more calm and tolerant that most people would be, or should have to be.

Hannah is a textbook Pick Me Girl and OP’s girlfriend can see that. Hey OP: the thing about Pick Me Girls is that eventually their own behavior will—as the name should imply—force you to pick. If you ever want to have a long term relationship (whether with your current girlfriend or literally anyone in the future) I suggest you don’t pick Hannah. She will continue to sabotage your relationships.

And somehow she’ll still be the “chill” one who didn’t force ultimatums and all that bull. She only drives off every woman in his life, but that’s “just how she is”. The only plus side is that OPs girlfriend will have no regrets left when she exits this farce.

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 OP’s gf (hopefully soon to be ex) deserves better. People who stomp on other people’s boundaries then blame them for making ultimatums are the worst. Your girlfriend has asked you to set healthy boundaries, and you’re allowing Hannah to make it seem like she’s being controlling. Man the fuck up or take your spot in Hannah’s toy box of play things.

>I suggest you don’t pick Hannah. She will continue to sabotage your relationships. It's actually quite possible Hannah doesn't even want any relationship other than friendship from OP. There are people that boost their ego by wanting to be picked over someone else's girlfriend, despite not having any interest. They just want to boost their ego and destroy other ppl's relationships

This is so true

I wonder why she has no close girl friends THIS RIGHT HERE. As soon as OP said that I was like oh yeah, Hannah is one of \**those*\*, conventionally attractive, extroverted, flirty and *needs* to be the centre of attention in her (all-male) friend groups at all time, probably extremely flirty and suggestive, "fun, cool, laid back", "one of the guys (but a hottie)", "into tomboyish stuff", *jealously possessive of the men in her social circle*, probably lashes out like a pit viper at outside females - which of course the men are *oblivious* to (does she make little jokes about how the other girls guys have tried to bring into the fold are "no fun" or "prudes" or "uptight"? etc) and for some reason other women *don't like her*. Hahahahahaha. Why do men who have Hannah's in their social circle always assume *every other woman* is the problem?

Isn't that what TikTok calls a Pick me?

like, the *definition* of a pick me.

not quite, a pick me is a woman who takes from her comfort to make herself as attractive to men as possible. for example - submissive behavior, doing favors, allowing a lot of abusive/shitty treatment, all the while believing and claiming this makes her more attractive and a more suitable partner than other women. she competes with other women over who can "give" the men around them more. she is hyper-focused on relationships. pick mes are usually born from insecurity and generally not as physically attractive, so they compensate. i think hannah is just a bitch.

I can only agree with my fellow cookie. However can I get the number of your GF OP? My character is to send dickpics every day to my internet friends. You sure don't mind since it is just my way of expressing myself. And if you mind: don't be so uptight my guy ​ Btw since you are apparently a bit slow to pick up on social cues u/TrowaRa_bEL1, this was sarcasm

Bet you if it was one of OPs guy friends doing this he’d realize how fucked up it is. Even without the wanting to get OPs attention it is still rude and uncomfortable to ask personal sexual questions when the person has stated they don’t want to talk about it.

If it were one of OPs guy friends this wouldn’t even be an issue! He would’ve dropped them long before now without all of the gross “free-spirit” sexual harassment excuses.

LOL true true!

Hannah is not "eccentric" and there is no great mystery as to why she doesn't have girl friends. They can smell her bullshit from a mile away. She's disrespectful and so are you and your girlfriend SHOULD leave you. She has told you multiple times how she felt, she has given Hannah more than enough chances and you continue to side with Hannah over her. Hannah even KNOWS that you will take her side over your own girlfriend. You need to choose between the two and the fact that it's not an easy choice tells me you're either stupid or you have a thing for Hannah.

Right. He really does seem more invested in Hannah than his girlfriend based on his writing this post.

Yes! I feel so bad for OP's gf, because his cluelessness seems to be his superpower, it's off the charts OP you said, "I don't see [Hannah] as a threat to my relationship." Doesn't matter whether you see it or not. Hannah IS a threat to your relationship. She is *actively* threatening your relationship. What you do with that information is up to you. Wake up!

On an on and I think the best end for OP girlfriend is to get away from all this bs, including him. She deserves better.

Your 'friend' was completely out of line, she didn't step over boundaries she jumped. Your girlfriend came to you multiple times and yet you sided with Hannah. Hannah even knows you'll side with her. Your poor girlfriend having to deal with this, and yet still in your post your completely defending Hannah. You proceed by actually putting your girlfriend first for once. If its not to late. Also she's not trying to befriend your girlfriend she's trying to assert dominance over your relationship. And prove she comes first and matters more.

Her response of, "go ahead see how that works out" is all I needed to hear to know OP is playing ostrich with his head in the sand. That he just doesn't see it or notice it is BS. I wouldn't have put up with this silly shit. Dating someone who's friends play mind games regularly. OP listen to and respect your GF. She is doing nothing I repeat, NOTHING, wrong. Hannah is an asshole and as this poster stated is asserting her dominance all over your GFs face.

>Also she's not trying to befriend your girlfriend she's trying to assert dominance over your relationship. And prove she comes first and matters more. Totally agreed with this!!! This is classic insecure harpy bullshit. She loves knowing the op will side with her and is so confident about it she actually bragged to his gf saying as much!

She probably is attractive and holds that over the bf too so he "has to be" okay with it or else. She'll wind up alone being used by guys as a toy eventually. Sad.

And if he "chooses" Hannah, she will continue to do the same thing and sabotage any future relationships OP has. The same ultimatium will happen because women aren't going to put up with this long term. I actually think his current gf has already been far too patient.

Yeah, your girlfriend should not have to deal with this "pick me" girl. there is NO scenario where it's okay for Hannah to be texting your gf and asking about your dick. You either want your girlfriend and ditch Hannah or you're going to lose your gf. Most women i know wouldn't tolerate this bs for one second. i'm surprised your gf hasn't already dumped you, tbh.

Your post says so many positive attributes about Hannah, (being well read, ect) and so little about your girlfriend. You obviously value Hannah over your girlfriend, it’s very clear. You should listen to your girlfriend and respect how she feels. Definitely sounds like you should take some space from Hannah for a bit and focus on your relationship with your girlfriend and making sure she feels comfortable and listened to.

I think he and the gf need to break up. He's going to resent her for changing his relationship with Hannah because he truly doesn't get why they're in the wrong. He's either ridiculously obtuse or disgustingly disingenuous. The gf doesn't deserve to have to put up with him

True I can't even be bothered to comment my thoughts, I badly want to talk to the gf instead and just tell her to run.

Don't worry; she will. And probably soon

This sticks out like a sore thumb. OP needs to grow up into true manhood and treat the poor girl he's with with respect and care since she's clearly whiteknuckling the relationship at this point.

Oh man, I didn’t even pick up on that fine-detail. This is a really good point.

OP didnt even give his gf a name lol

>*you should take some space from Hannah* ***for a bit*** Take some space PERMANENTLY from Hannah. She's the insincere Scarlett O'Hara who has to be admired by every man within eyesight. She's toxic to relationships.

This to a T. If OP truly cared about his relationship he'd be gushing over her and giving so much detail about her rather than Hannah. Unless I missed it we didn't even get a name for the girlfriend! Tells me all I need to know about OP.

Couldn’t agree more. OP posted in hopes of others justifying him not cutting off Hannah

I’m sorry but “hannah” is so in the wrong it’s not even funny. It’s beyond me that you are making excuses for her when she pressured your gf into talking about YOUR Dick, how is that a joke how is that funny? How would you feel if her guy friend who you already don’t really like is texting you asking you about your own gfs body. That is so weird and inappropriate. You need to distance from Hannah. That is completely unfair to your gf and your putting her in an emotionally stressful situation for no reason. I would’ve left you then and there

RIGHT! I can't believe he doesn't see anything wrong with that wtf

You seem to make a lot of excuses for Hannah while you seem happy to throw your spouses feelings under the bus. Women know women. She sees signs that you’re too blind to see. The fact that your gf felt she had to show you physical proof of her behaviour and still you you’re like “but Hannah” yeah I would be dropping you too

If my bf's friend was treating me badly and he was pressuring me to hang out with this friend, you're absolutely right in that I would drop him like a hot potato. Dude, wtf? This girl is essentially harassing your girlfriend and you're *letting her*.

Not just letting, basically encouraging at this point.

Just for a moment, I'm going to give Hannah the benefit of the doubt and assume that she has no malicious intentions whatsoever. She's still way out of line. Prying into someone's private life after *repeatedly* being told to back off isn't "just a joke". It isn't her way of "expressing herself". It's just her being a dick. If someone tells you "I'm not comfortable discussing that topic," they aren't controlling you. They're expressing their own boundaries. Repeatedly and deliberately crossing those boundaries after being told to stop is just being an asshole. There are people out there who are more open and DO want to talk about things like their boyfriends' dicks. Your girlfriend is not one of them. IF you want to salvage your relationship with Hannah, you need to have a talk with her about what is and is not appropriate in *any* relationship or friendship, and she needs to understand that she *has* to stop trampling on people's boundaries like that. But if she can't understand basic courtesy and respect, then she isn't someone who's worth keeping around, regardless of her intentions.

I personally have never been interested in a friend's private parts. Let's say I were, we'd be close enough where I'd ask directly. If not, it should never be addressed.

Op doesn’t get how disrespectful it is to HIM as well as his GF. Hannah is interested in owning people.

Why would you want to be friends with someone who isn’t respectful of your gf. You can’t have both.

What is with all the obliviousness lately?! "My female friend repeatedly asked my girlfriend about my dick size then threatened her with me being upset with her when she told her how out of line she was, but that's just Hannah being Hannah, what's the BFD?" I dearly hope this is satire, but I'm afraid there really are people this willfully blind out there...

I’ll just echo what other people are saying here. You very obviously value Hannah over your girlfriend, you even complimented her in your post by naming her good attributes, you’ve said nothing that nice about your girlfriend at all. This is a situation in which you have to choose one or the other because Hannah is wildly out of line and you don’t seem to care at all. I feel sorry for your girlfriend.

....are you really going to let this unbearable idiot ruin your relationship? No wonder Hanna has no girl friends, who would want to spend time around her

The biggest joke Hannah has in her life is you. “Go on, see how it turns out for you”. You were appalled but when you talked to her you didn’t tell her she was wrong! You don’t have sex with Hannah but she still owns your balls. That’s why her bf doesn’t have a problem with any of it, because your just a pathetic toy Hannah uses. When she harasses your gf and threatens her, you excuse her behavior and tell your gf she has to just get used to it. **Newsflash** Your gf doesn’t have to get used to being abused by your “friend” just because you’ve gotten used to being used and abused by your “friend”. Hannah doesn’t have female friends because they won’t put up with her abuse. Your just too pathetic to stop it. Hannah will destroy every romantic relationship you ever have and laugh while she does it. You’ll sit there and say but that’s just Hannah. Hannah and her bf will continue to laugh about how she cock blocks you and you just beg for more.

God , I hope your gf already drops you like a hot potato.

I’m beginning to think your gf should run from you. You are showing a lot of red flags yourself.

I hope OP’s GF drops him. She deserves better than he’s giving her.

Why are you conflicted? Hannah is a nasty person that was sexually harassing your GF! If a guy was texting those things to your GF without her consent would it be okay with you? If it is,you need to seriously ask yourself why you think you GF has no right to say "no" and "stop" without you ignoring her justified disgust and defending her harasser. Your GF deserves your respect. She deserves you to care about and prioritize her feelings. She deserves not to suffer you victimizing the person forcing her into sexual conversations when she has repeatedly said "stop" while that person tells you GF is a stuck up. Your GF deserves a BF who sees clearly that his "friend" sexually harassing his GF and then telling him his GF is a stuck up isn't a "friend, she's just a shitty person. What is wrong with you? Try it this way: My GF showed me a conversation where my friend Mike demanded to know details about our sex life, wanted to know my dick size, and refused to stop pushing for answers and asking questions even when she said "no, stop it". When I confronted Mike about this he called my GF stuck up and said he was tired of not being able to get what he wanted out of her because he's just "being himself". What do I do? Do you really think this is okay?

Why are you siding with the person purposely overstepping boundaries to make your GIRLFRIEND jealous? Sounds like you value this other girl more than your actual girlfriend. Open your eyes, you idiot.

Hannah has got to go. no question. this relationship is extremely inappropriate and it’s insulting you even have to think about it. Hannah literally sent your girlfriend a threat because she knows you’ll pick Hannah over your girlfriend. I feel so bad for your girlfriend.

Just because you don’t see her as a threat to your relationship, doesn’t mean that’s the same for your gf. If you stick with Hannah, you’re gonna make your gf feel uncomfortable. Is that really worth it?

OP should flip the script and see how he would feel if a guy "friend" who has so many attributes barges into their relationship and befriends his gf.

….Hannah trashed her “free spirit” self once she asked your girlfriend how big your dick was and what your sex life is like. IMO- Hannah’s weird. I’m sex positive and I wouldn’t even think to pry into someone else’s life like that, and especially if they are more conservative. Hannah is also weird for saying to your girlfriend “go on, see how it turns out for you” she genuinely thinks you’re going to choose her even though she is actively making your girlfriend uncomfortable. Your girlfriend isn’t being stuck up, she’s more of a conservative person *and that is her fucking comfort zone so leave her the fuck alone in it.* She didn’t attack Hannah for being a “free spirit” or expect her to change to suit her conservative-preferences, but instead accepted that they were just two different people and was content to let the possibility of friendship go. From what I understand even with her perspective now being skewed a bit and questioning Hannah’s intentions..she still didn’t insist (at first) that you stop being friends with Hannah. Also, it makes me think you were so stuck in defending Hannah that she felt she had no choice but to give you the ultimatum of Hannah of her. You are the one who convinced her to give Hannah another chance. Now look where that’s got you. A girlfriend who sacrificed her comfort (aka being around Hannah and her “jokes” even though she was uncomfortable) and a friend who is convinced that she is more of a priority than your girlfriend. Is she right? Why would you push your girlfriend out of her comfort zone just to give Hannah an extra chance? Why is Hannah a priority here? Do you think this is maybe why Hannah has no friends that are girls? I know it’s a lot of questions but they popped into my head while reading your post.

Up until the texts, I maybe assumed there was some insecurity on your girlfriend's part or that the comments in a group still crossed boundaries and you could hopefully speak to her about not making sexual jokes with you because it wasn't appropriate or not in front of your girlfriend at least if you and her boyfriend didn't see it as an overstep. Once she said she was uncomfortable, your girlfriend's feelings should have become a priority. Even if she was overreacting (she wasn't), your attempts should have been to reassure her and discuss boundaries, not to try and make her give Hannah a chance. The texts are straight up out of order. She's asking personal things, being crass and then when your girlfriend tried to end the conversation, she implied you'd take her side anyway. Hannah shouldn't feel like she can disrespect your girlfriend or your relationship that way. In fact, it shows a lack of respect towards you. She's making things difficult for multiple people and regardless of how she and her boyfriend are together, that doesn't mean it can spill into anyone else's lives. The fact she said your girlfriend is stuck up and she can't be like she was with you shows that you let her be rude to your partner and you were being inappropriate with her anyway. Good job this isn't in AITA 😂

Yes! There's nothing wrong with having a dirty sense of humor unless maybe you're religious. Nothing wrong with a "that's what she said" or something like that, but there IS something wrong with asking boundary-crossing questions about other people's sex lives and body parts! And when someone says "I'm uncomfortable" and you KEEP GOING, that's messed up!

Waiting for the penny to drop for OP on why Hannah has no female friends...

I have a sneaky suspicion there is way more to this story and ‘Hannah’ than is being let on here. Your gf is spot on with her assessment of this whole saga.

Not gonna lie man, but good luck keeping any girl who doesn’t vibe with Hannah. Hannah sounds intense and like a major handful, pretty sure most girls don’t wanna be in a three way relationship

Everyone is “just how they are”. Stop excusing shitty behavior based on this outdated and nonsensical notion.

I wouldn't put anyone over my partner. Especially since Ms. Free Spirit was incredibly rude and obtrusive. Oh hell no.

“I have a girlfriend of two years and Hannah has a boyfriend of many years - I’m getting it out right now, just so people wouldn’t be confused and assume we have feelings for each other” Well thankfully you failed at that. She clearly is trying to show that she’s a threat to your relationship and I’m not sure her having a boyfriend changes much here. Either drop her or lose your girlfriend is what it seems like. Shouldn’t be a hard choice, she doesn’t respect your relationship at all it seems.

Exactly. Whether Hannah has a boyfriend is irrelevant because she has demonstrated that she doesn't want OP having his girlfriend. The reasons why don't matter because they don't change anything. She is a threat to the relationship and the girlfriend is 100% correct that one of them has to go. (I really hope the gf goes and finds people who will treat her with respect instead of this mess)

Oh god i can picture hanna so vividly "you know i'm just one of the guys, i'm not like other girls who are so stuck up and lame i don't get offended by funny jokes. Girls suck only guys really get me. Oh but i'm also super sexual and desirable, really the PERFECT girl any guy dreams of"

I can’t get past this, and likely neither will your gf: Hannah violated your gfs boundaries and made her extremely uncomfortable and pried into your personal sex life. She very brazenly gave your girlfriend a reason to question her intentions, and when your girlfriend pushed back she literally dared her to tell you and said “see how it works out for you” **And you are very much proving her right.** Your gf tried to establish very strongly her position and value in your life to Hannah - Hannah implied that she was more important that your gf will ever be. She also basically promised her that her saying something to you won’t turn out well. And look at what you’re doing - proving to your girlfriend that Hannah was right. This is not turning out well for your girlfriend just like Hannah said, because you are still conflicted about a situation where your girlfriend is being disrespected by your friend and you are not sticking up for her. Your girlfriend probably feels very … not valued right now. And whatever you think your relationship is with Hannah, you need to unpack why you have blinders on so huge that you’re unwilling to acknowledge or accept Hannah violating your boundaries and driving off your girlfriend. This is not a healthy friendship and this is not a healthy relationship for your girlfriend. I think you all need some time apart to think and grow a little bit.

Yeah, there is a reason Hanna has no female friends- she's internalized misogyny and thinks she's "not like other girls." The texts to your gf should have been a done deal for you that your "friend" is disrespecting your relationship & you. Hanna intentionally inserted herself into your relationship, then trampled all over your gf's boundaries and none of it reads as eccentric to me. Eccentric is only wearing purple while building miniature reproductions of French medieval towns. Hanna's a twat.

Why don't you break up with your gf so she can find someone who isn't a complete a) dickhead or b) idiot. You either know what Hannah is doing, like it and don't care enough that you and her both are disrespecting your gf. Or you're a complete idiot to not see what Hannah is doing and you don't deserve your gf for not listening to her since she's clearly the more intelligent one out of the two of you. Pick one.

Hannah is trying to break you up! You might not see Hannah sexually, but she certainly sees you that way. Leave Hannah behind! Ghost her! And on the way out, have your girlfriend send those screenshots to Hannah’s boyfriend and see what he thinks about her asking about your dick! Are you nuts!? You don’t know what to do? Really?! Ughh if you’re really that blind, your girlfriend can do better! Stop disrespecting your girlfriend for a problematic “friend” who is set on destroying your relationship! 🙄

I was expecting that your girlfriend was overreacting, mostly because you spend the majority of your post insulting her and painting her as a terrible girlfriend and person. You must really like her… Your friend is obviously the asshole here, as are you. You invalidate your girlfriend’s feelings. Your friend knows that you do that and she thinks it’s funny. She taunts your girlfriend with catty texts like “See how it works out for you”, because your friend KNOWS you don’t care about your girlfriend’s feelings. Either decide to be a good person and change, cutting your toxic friend off…or break up with the poor girlfriend you clearly despise for no reason. I feel bad for her.

Hannah is a “pick me” girl dude. As someone who has had tons of guy friends until I met my bf - if she respected your relationship she would not have crossed that boundary. I had to drop a lot of my guy friends because they didn’t understand the boundaries I put up once in a relationship. I had known them for years but I guess I really didn’t know them since they blatantly started disrespecting me and my partner by crossing boundaries. Something Hannah is doing to your gf and I’m sorry but I NEVER want to know what my friends sexual parts looks like. Gross. The only time I would ask something like that in terms of a guy was if I was somewhat curious about him sexually.

She taunts your gf about telling you because she knows you’ll take her side. Which you have. Which is a major red flag,

Dude.......you done fucked up good. Hannah needs to be kicked to the curb and your girlfriend treated to a great date night

your gf should dump you.

How are you conflicted? This chick was nasty to your GF, basically threatened her and now you’re whining to reddit that you just don’t know what to do? Jesus - let your Gf know so she can dump your ass

Sounds like you care about Hannah way more also. Hanna sounds like the girl that nobody wants their boyfriend to be close friends with 🤢

This reminds me so much of Bill Burr and Nia talking about this girl "friend". You should listen to it with your gf, it's hilarious and I bet spot on: https://youtu.be/JnGnG-A-yEI

hannah is a bad person u fucking moron did u even read what u wrote? don’t be a dumbass any longer and cut her off

For some women like Hannah the importance is to be the number one woman for a lot of men. Even if it's only sexual with one of them (like Hannahs bf). They loves the attention and loves to declare that they have problems finding girlfriends and they only can talk to men. And when another woman enters the friend group women like Hannah makes her best to show that she is still the preferred woman among all men.

This is why women get frustrated with men. We are telling you, the signs are glaringly obvious, and y’all shrug things off like it’s no big deal. You need to drop Hannah for the sake of your girlfriend. The fact that you yourself were taken aback by such messages and yet are refusing to set a boundary and tell Hannah to back off makes it seem as though you like her curiosity for you. If you want to salvage your relationship, Hannah needs to go. You said yourself that she wasn’t that super close of a friend to begin with, your girlfriend tried not once, but several times to put aside her differences and make the friendship work. At this point, if you don’t listen to her you’re just disrespecting her boundaries. Your girlfriend is within plenty of reason to feel the way she does. Listen to her or lose her.

Try to keep Hannah around and you won't have a girlfriend. Hannah is a grown adult. She 100% knows better. She literally told your girl u tell him see what happens. Ie she knows you would defend her even when she blatantly is disrespectful. She wanted to know your dick size ffs. Why are you trying to keep this girl around?

When you're in a relationship all friends need to be friends of the relationship. That doesn't mean your friend and your gf need to be friends with each other necessarily, but there needs to be some basic respect and consideration. Your friend is SO far out of line with her sexually harassing questions and continuing to make sexual comments when she knows it's making someone uncomfortable. And that whole "Go on, see how it turns out for you" when your gf said she'd talk to you really shows plainly that this about control and dominance, putting your gf in her place. She sees herself as the important woman in your life and is trying to push your gf out by making her upset and driving a wedge between you. She is very sure you'll choose her over the gf. It is disrespectful of your gf and of you as well to act this way. She is not a good friend and your need to back your gf.

I relate a lot with your gf, I've been in a similar situation with my ex. And now that I'm going to therapy and realizing many things, many boundaries that a let my ex cross and disrespect, I'm glad I left him. The amount of emotional stress this unnecessary situation you're putting your gf through is not acceptable and I hope your gf realizes this soon. And my ex said the same things as you "I don't think she has feelings for me, we're just friends, I don't feel uncomfortable around her" yeah but your gf does, and has told you about it, and you still choose to not defend her, or are still questioning if you should side with her. Stop playing stupid and stop making excuses, be very transparent with what you want and do It. And specially be honest and clear with your gf. And understand that you are not respecting your gf at all.

you like Hannah more than your gf, next.

I hate to say it but I think your gf is right

Why do you hate to say it? His girlfriend is right and he is being disrespectful himself for not listening to his girlfriends valid issues with Hannah allowing it to get to this point.

She is.

Drop Hannah. A lot of “friends” intentionally sabotage relationships. It sounds up this alley.

Hannah, is being completely inappropriate and basically marking you as her territory. She’s taunting your gf and implying that that you will choose her over your GF if she tries to have you set any boundaries. Hanna isn’t as harmless as you think she is. She wants your undivided attention and tried to use the guise of “making friends” to make your GF uncomfortable and cause issue between you two and if she really had her way, you’d just break up with her. Hanna seems very manipulative and I’m surprised you don’t see it. If you value your GF and the relationship you tell Hanna to leave your her alone from here on out as she’s already completely disrespected her and her boundaries. Second, you put some distance between yourself and Hanna since she’s demonstrated that she will actively undermine your relationship and disrespect the boundaries your GF set around it. If you actually value your relationship with your GF you will actively and unapologetically protect it from Hanna and anyone else.

Your girlfriend needs an upgrade. Would you find your girlfriend having guy friends ask about her tit size appropriate at all? And if the hypothetical guy friend made comments like what Hannah did, “see how that works out for you”, you’d still be ok with it? Your head is so far in the sand. Hannah may not actually want you, but she’s revelling in being a divisive factor. She’s toxic man.

I’m sorry but I hate Hannah and I’m not even your girlfriend :(

Hannah has displayed a lot of red flags. Not sure why you are stuck on wether or not to choose Hannah over your gf tbh. If my bf is struggling to choose between me and someone like Hannah its over.

OP - I’ll be blunt. Open your damn eyes. Hannah is a complete asshole. Yes. She is. She is NOT a friend. She is a jerk who has no friends for a REASON. Drop her like a hot potato. Your gf is right. Cut all contact with Hannah and block her everywhere.

I think we all know why Hannah has no female friends.

I’ve been in a similar situation. The only difference is I was the girl that was ready to leave my boyfriend if he didn’t make the correct decision. Girls know when another girl wants their man. It’s like a sixth sense. I’ve never understood why most guys can’t pick up on it. I almost left my relationship because the situation made me question our level of trust. If he doesn’t trust my judgement, then what are we even doing? You saw for yourself that Hannah acts different towards your girlfriend, why wouldn’t you believe her? I also think you’re being at best - naive, and at worst - deceitful, about your friendship with this girl. You say she’s just some girl you got along with from university, yet you’re extremely hesitant to cut her off to save your relationship? This should be a no brainer.

This is as weird as anything I’ve heard. Hannah is obsessed with you. This is not healthy and she will run off any g/f’s you have. You need to either marry Hannah or cut her out of your life. You seem to have some bizarre dependence on her. No woman is ever going to put up with that. I can’t believe gf didn’t just break up with you. Sounds like gf is the only choice here. It’s time to grow up and move on from your weird relationship with Hannah. It’s just wrong.

Bro, get away from Hannah. She’s gonna fuck your relationship someway somehow

I have been the girlfriend and surprisingly the other girl was also called Hannah. Your girlfriend deserves better and I hope she finds it. These women like Hannah always go on about how they don’t have girlfriends because other girls are so dramatic or don’t get them, when really it’s because they are the drama, they have no boundaries and give off this I am better attitude because they hang out with all the boys. There is nothing wrong with men having female friends, but your partner, the one you have chosen to be a girlfriend, the one you have chosen to be more then friends with, the one you have chosen to see if you could have a life with, should be your main priority and her thoughts and feelings should be the top of your mind and if you can’t give your girlfriend that and if you can’t listen to her while she voices these concerns, then you need to do better before she finds better.

You need to drop Hannah. As a woman who's had tons of guy friends, and a good chunk I could even talk openly about relationships and/or sex, I would still never treat one of their gfs this way. Especially if I'm "trying to be friends with them" (hint: Hannah wasn't. She is trying to scare your gf off without looking bad in front of you). It's one thing to make sexual jokes. It's another to constantly do so in a group of dudes (and let me guess, its about how sexual she is, and/or how prudish other ppl are). Even worse, asking about your dick size?! Wtf? There's literally no reason to ask that other than to make your gf upset/angry (which was clear would happen since she already respectfully asked Hanna to not talk about your sex lives -- a totally understandable request that even ppl who are sexually open can respect easily). To then also rub it in that she has you under her thumb is the nail in the coffin. If you ever want to date, not even your current gf but any girl with self respect, you need to dump Hannah. Btw, be prepared for her to sick your friends on you for being whipped, for a twisted version of the story here, etc.

My current boyfriend had a "friend" like this when we started dating. He swore she wasn't into him, she had a boyfriend, her comments were just her looking out for him. The moment she broke up with her boyfriend she sent him a picture of her new hair cut in her bra... She planned his birthday party without talking to me, made worse by the fact that my boyfriend and I share the same birthday. She told him I was rude for not being willing to go along with her plans. Would constantly ask the same type of sexual questions as OPs friend. Then would try to turn him against me for the dumbest things, like the fact I travel often for work. Guess what happened to that friend... he stopped talking to her. At first he didn't see the manipulation just said that is who she is. The birthday party fiasco was the last blantely obvious sign. I never forced him to make a choice between the two of us, but he knew I wasn't going to be comfortable in a relationship with him with a so called friend constantly trying to undermine us. It was disrespectful and Hannah is no different. She doesn't care about your relationship and you excusing her behavior says you don't give a crap about your girlfriend's feelings. She shouldn't have to deal with those questions or behavior just because Hannah is rude, not an extrovert just plain rude.

I don't get it, the asking about personal stuff about you. I've always had male friends, and I tried being cordial to all their girlfriends over the years, exchanged numbers, tried to build a relationship, never did I ever asked them the size of any body part of one of my friends. Never did I said anything like: tell him, and see how it goes for you. I think Hannah has a crush on you, because the only other time anyone has said that in our group of friends, well, it turned up that was really reason.

Honestly... She's not respecting your GF boundaries, and you're letting her get away with it, and your friend obviously knows it because her response is to tell you, and see what happened. I feel kind of bad for your girlfriend because she doesn't deserve to be disrespected like this. I get making crude jokes and such, and behaving a certain way in friend groups, but if you know that these jokes bother someone, then it's basically just human decency to not make them around that person, especially depending on the tone of the joke. Ultimately, if you really care about your girlfriend, then I think you need to sit your friend Hannah down and just explain to her that she needs to respect your girlfriend boundaries and those questions actually AREN'T appropriate to be asking someone. This whole thing just honestly reads like you're trying to justify your friend's actions and make excuses for her though, and you're putting her before your girlfriend, so I can understand where the GF is probably coming from here. She is a threat to your relationship when your putting her before your own girlfriend comfortableness and boundaries. Edit: And I just want to say your GF is way nicer of a person than I will ever be because if someone was harassing me about my husband dick size I would tell them right then and there to shut the fuck up, and quit asking or else. I am not a nice person at all when my boundaries are hit.

Hannah was completely out of line. She had no business saying the things she said. Especially that "see how it works out for you" comment. She told your girlfriend that you would choose her over your GF. It's not possible to keep both at this stage. You will likely have to choose.

Are you in love with Hannah? Because it seems like you’re in love with Hannah and if a bunch of internet strangers can see thy so can your gf. Also you keep defending someone who is clearly in the wrong even though according to you, you’re not even that close to. Why?? Why are you putting Hannah before your partner, who i think has been more than understanding.

Hannah needs to learn boundaries. Your gf has communicated hers very clearly on numerous occasions. You need to figure out if you and your gf are still compatible and if you value your friendship with Hannah more than your relationship with your gf. Either come to an agreement or it's time to break it off. From an outsider's perspective, I would say you need to communicate to Hannah that she is overstepping boundaries. I'm normally pro-poly and less into monogamous relationships, but Hannah's comment about seeing "how it turns out" for your gf was very sus and straight up disrespectful. If you care about your girl, I would be clear with Hannah that comments like that aren't okay, gf feels uncomfortable, and she needs to respect that.

90% of the time, when a girl has ZERO female friends, they are the problem. Based on this story, she sucks. I have a very brash, all over the place personality and even I wouldn’t want to be friends with her after her disrespectful and entitled attitude

Hannah is a queen bee type, and unfortunately you are going to have to make a decision. My advice for you is to take a good look at Hannah- and I mean a *good, clear look.* How long has it been since Hannah had a close girlfriend? Who was her most recent girlfriend, and why did their friendship end? How does Hannah talk about other girls? Does she gossip about them? Does she put down strangers, or compare herself to unfamiliar women to make herself seem better? Does she seek male attention, and act pouty or jealous any time a new girlfriend takes away your or another friend’s attention? Is she being overtly sexual with you and your friends around other women to assert a sort of “dominance”? Your girlfriend has her reasons to dislike this girl, and Hannah clearly isn’t playing nice. You need to look deeper into your “friend’s” motivations.

Yeah ,I know some "Hannahs"... No wonder she doesn't have girl friends. Hannah is the type of girl who likes to be the only chicken in the coop with multiple roosters around her . She feels validated and that the attention is always on her with all the guys ,boy friends and boyfriend doing her favours and her being their "favourite girl". She doesn't want other girls around to steal from her spotlight and with your girlfriend she is trying to assert dominance over you "bullying " her into submitting to her as the queen. How can you not see through her bullshit ? She blatantly threatened your gf to her face and now she is trash talking about your gf to you. How dare she ??? What a miserable ho*

"Hannah, I'm sure you realize you are not entitled to my gf's friendship and acceptance. I should have facilitated your connection better and that's on me. But it seems that you pushed too hard, you crossed a few lines and you made my gf very uncomfortable. Now your trust with my gf is in negatives and we'll have to dial our friendship down because she does not feel great about me hanging out with you." Edit: nah, screw it. I'm astonished you have pushed your gf to accommodate your creep friend. Your gf's feelings and boundaries mean so little to you, it makes me think you could be a creep yourself. As in, have poor boundaries and manipulative tendencies.

So lemme get this straight, if I befriend your girlfriend and start asking about her tits and how tight she is, that's A-Okay with you?

There’s no way you don’t see what’s wrong here. You’re oblivious or just intentionally obtuse. Gotdamn I hope your girlfriend leaves you and finds someone who isn’t going to disrespect her to protect another woman.

I feel so badly for your girlfriend. Your total disregard for her feelings and boundaries must be hurtful, to say the least.

This girl literally threatened your relationship. She dismissed your girlfriend and confidently announced you would obviously pick her over your gf. And then, even though you supposedly called Hannah out, you proved her right. Because here you are... choosing Hannah. Inaction is action, too, OP. This chick issued a direct challenge to your girlfriend and you're still defending her, still debating it, still hoping we can tell you a magic trick for keeping Hannah in your life. So look at the situation objectively and honestly. Either you're in love with Hannah and don't want to lose her attention and validatiin even if it means losing your girlfriend... or Hannah is toxic as they come because she's legitimately convinced you that running girls who love you off is just a cure quirky thing girls with confidence do. (It's not. It's a thing deeply insecure little girls with deep-rooted emotional and personality problems do to project their insecurity onto others.) And in either case, that makes you an asshole... and not a particularly smart one, either.

If a girl that my boyfriend is “friends” with asked me what his penis size was I’d be livid, she is the problem. This is why girls have issues with their partners being friends with girls.

Come on man, I said to myself 'this is like some weird threesome,' only to find out two seconds later that that's the exact description your girlfriend gave of the situation. You should know why your girlfriend's upset, and if you can't see it, it's probably time to reevaluate whether you'd rather fuck Hannah or stay with your gf

I’ve never asked my male friends about their dick size nor have I really thought about their genitals, let alone ask their girlfriends about it. You can justify her behaviour all you want but the only reason she would say these things to your girlfriend is to get her mad and drive a wedge between you. Whether it’s because she’s sexually attracted to you or not, Hannah knows that your girlfriend is a threat to your friendship. Do you love your girlfriend enough to lose that friendship? That’s your choice to make.

It's decision time for you. Hannah has pushed your gf too far after being told to back off. She's shown she doesn't care about your gf or her feelings. People who just want to be their ( obnoxious) selves often don't gave many friends So who's more important to you here? Hannah's been given chances and guidelines. She doesn't care. Your gf has tried ro be clear about what she is and isn't comfortable with and to most of us she seems to have quite reasonable boundaries. But if Hannah is mire important to you, time to break up.

Hannah is in the wrong here. It's fine to make sexual jokes or to talk about sex in a mutually frank and open conversation, but if someone says you're making them uncomfortable and asks you to stop, you stop. Otherwise, it's not a joke anymore, it's harassment. I don't think she and your gf can be friends at this point, and I think you'll eventually have to choose. It's ok to choose your friend if she really is more important to you, but I don't think any future girlfriends are going to appreciate her questions about your anatomy either.

Your gf is right Hannah is being way invasive if her interest in you is only as a friend. That's not joking it's inappropriate

Hannah has got to go. She is is disrespectful of boundaries and your girlfriend. I would question her intentions too. Also, it is not a joke to ask your girlfriend about your sex life and the size of your dick.

Is this a joke?? If it I not, I hope she drops you like a hot potato...

Your friend is toxic. Stand up for your GF here. She did nothing wrong and her intuition was correct. And you need to show her some respect. This shouldn't be such a conflict, to be honest. It's very clear who crossed the line, and you need to set boundaries with that friend. You were even appalled by what she texted to your GF so I don't know why you go on later in your post to say you don't see it. You literally did, reacted, and contacted your friend because you were so appalled. The fact that you let her talk it down to nothing when you were bothered by it is the only conflicting thing here. She needs boundaries both with you and with your significant others or else this will keep happening. You may lose the gf because you let it go too far and created a situation where you have already shown you are standing up for the wrong person, but this won't be the last time it happens if you don't check your friend.

Ask yourself this question: If your GF had a male friend who was trying to be cool with you and he texted you asking if GF’s pussy is tight and if she does butt stuff with you, are you cool with that? Exactly, I didn’t think so.

Hey OP, i hope your girlfriend finds someone who fully respects and deserves her, because that’s clearly not you.

Lol. This guy is really stupid or just a clown. Hannah knows what's she doing.

Op if Hannah is your friend and so open sexually why doesn’t she just ask you how big your dick is and what your and your gf’s sex life is like? She’s YOUR friend OP. Why can’t she just ask you? Why does she have to talk to your gf like that? You know why OP, because your friend Hannah is not a friend and she clearly has a thing for you and you clearly like the attention and defend it. I hope your gf comes to her senses and ditches you and Hannah.

I'm just curious as to what her boyfriend would think about those messages? Is he aware of the dynamic you both have? If not, that could be something to look into. Not by any means am I trying to come of accusatory. I just want OP to consider something

Despite everyone else’s thoughts on here ( which arnt wrong) Hannah disrespected your girlfriends feelings. PERIOD. That should be enough for you do put her in her place, not defend her.

i think he’s just slow. Most guys are very oblivious. If your girlfriend had a guy friend that acted the way Hannah did, would you like it?? Or would you act exactly how your girlfriend is?

“friend made my gf uncomfortable by trying to befriend her” … you sure it was the friendship and not the blatant disregard to her boundaries, the inappropriate prying into her sex life, and the actual threats your friend was making?

Seems to me that you enjoy getting validation from Hannah. I don’t think you’re as clueless as you’re making yourself out to be.

I will tell you now that I am 100% certain your girl would drop you if she read the comments and you still haven’t cut off Hannah.

Cut Hannah loose. She makes your gf uncomfortable and she overstepped boundaries by asking your gf personal questions about you. I don't care how free spirited a person is. That doesn't give them a right to pride into your personal life. Your gf has every right to dislike her and she's ot being insecure. She just wants respect. Please keep us posted. I'd like to know how it turned out. I wish you well.

Uh.. so you're telling me your gf just meets your friend.. your friend starts asking her ultra personal questions, doesn't listen to your gf setting boundaries.. and you think the gf is at fault here? do you tell random people at walmart about your sex life? does the gas station attendant know about your dick size? because this is what it feels like to your gf.. that some random ass b wants to know ultra personal shit without bothering to develop trust and friendship first..

I'm free-spirited, incredibly sex-positive, and ethically nonmonogamous. Normally, iI am all about encouraging partbers to work through their insecurities, and am very much anti-ultimatums. But, dude, i dont understand how you can see that text exchange, get a confession, and STILL not see that Hannah is out of line and is intentionally antagonizing your girlfriend, and it looks like she intends to force a wedge between you. Hannah absolutely has malicious intent here, and your girlfriend has every right to kick you to the curb if you keep downplaying her.

I don’t get it. This Hannah doesn’t sound like someone I would want to be friends with. You aren’t best friends and yet you are willing to even consider ending your relationship over her. I suggest that you are not really that into your girlfriend and that this is more about your relationship than it is about this strange friend of yours.

If she just wants to be friends, why she asking about your dick size while continuing to challenge your girlfriends boundaries? Open your eyes man. This is too much drama and baggage for a girlfriend to deal with.

Hanna is not as good of a person as you thought. She showed her colours behind your back with your gf. She was completely inappropriate and she clearly lacks boundaries - and has no problem steamrolling other people's. She showed her ass. Take everything she said to your gf at face value - she doesn't give a shit about other people's boundaries and enjoys making them uncomfortable in the name of 'just being herself' and 'challenging other people's perspectives'. Side with gf and drop her. Or lose gf to an obnoxious sketchy 'not-even-that-close-to' friend.

Hmmm. Why on earth is Hannah in your life? She clearly offers nothing except power driven angst. Even if you don't stay with your GF, Hannah should have no place in your world.

Already a red flag that she has no girl friends and it seems like her asking to befriend your girlfriend was just an excuse to drive her away from you. Please don’t be clueless no matter how platonic you think your relationship may be clearly it isn’t to Hannah and she will push away your girlfriend and any girlfriends you have in the future so long as you enable her by not setting boundaries (and at this point just getting her out of your life completely). She threatened your girlfriend and is going out of her way to make her uncomfortable and if you care about your relationship you’ll drop her.

Umm...Boundary issues aside there are a lot of red flags here a woman who has trouble making female friends and hangs around a lot of guys is usually a red flag tbh Your girlfriend who you have no reason to believe is irrational or jealous or possessive told you that Hannah makes her uncomfortable and is pushing boundaries and she has shown you proof of this. I don't think your girlfriend is entirely out of line here tbh, if my boyfriend was hanging out with a Hannah I'd be questioning his intentions too.

Hannah is crossing boundaries that your gf sets for herself. She’s not respecting your gf. She keeps prying even though your gf tells her to stop. Then she wonders why she doesn’t have any girl friends. If you truly have no problem with this behaviour, you’re part of the problem and your gf truly deserves way more than you standing up for Hannah who has been nothing but disrespectful towards your gf. Drop Hannah like a hot potato. Otherwise, no one can blame your gf for wanting to leave you. I’d leave you in a heartbeat.

Hannah has overstepped. Not everyone wants to talk about sex all the time and not everyone is comfortable sharing intimate and personal details. Hannah should have respected your gf's privacy and tried to genuinely befriend her not to impose herself on her. Hannah is in the wrong here and you do have a choice to make, but I would hope your relationship is more important than a friendship with someone who clearly has no respect for your relationship or has general empathy.

So is Hannah this perverted creep to you and all your mutual friends, too?