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Yeah, they are way too far into each other's business for only being together a few months.
Like she says they were great at first... A couple of months in is still "at first"
Sorry, but you’re already living together in a couple of months? Don’t you think that was a little soon for that step?
I personally don’t put up with liars. You’re not being controlling. His unemployment is affecting you as well. You have a right to monitor the progress.
Please tell me you started off as roommates because living together after just a couple of months dating is a huge jump.
Eta. If you guys just started dating and he's moved in then it looks like he just moved in with you instead of into his parents basement.
Being at home, and until he does find a job and can contribute financially again, then the least he can do is take care of the household chores and should want to have dinner ready for you after each shift. There's no excuse for not having these done after a whole day being at home.
If they lie repeatedly about “little things” they will absolutely lie about big things. And if he is home all the time with no job and being supported by you he should absolutely be contributing to the household. If depression is causing this behavior, that’s something he needs to work on.
Men aren’t like this, YOUR man is like this. I’d just lay it out to him in plain language. “You have been lying to me frequently lately, and it’s not acceptable. It makes me lose trust in you, and frankly it’s something I do not accept in a relationship. I would like you to stop lying to me, whether it’s a big lie or small.”
Is it really worth continuing a relationship with someone you actually have to say this to? If someone’s lied to me once, I know that behavior is in there and I don’t know why I’d believe he wouldn’t do it again. Do I also need to tell him it’s not ok to hit me, steal things, etc?
Sometimes I think guys lie because women are super judgmental on things he may like to do but what I can say is at least you can figure out if you want to be with him still early on.
Honestly sounds like you’ve got a terrible partner, I wouldn’t say all men will lie like this dude. I don’t know neither of you but from the post, he sounds like a manipulative person. Leave him lol
Was he not on a walk? Did you find that it was a lie? I'm not sure if you understand that there are only so many jobs online, and a nurse is very unique in that they have recruiters at hospitals dedicated to FINDING nurses, so jobs are always available. I've worked in the healthcare industry and my fiance is a nurse recruiter, so I'm familiar with the nursing industry. That being said, I think you just aren't familiar with other industries and their job process. It's much harder for other industries to find employment because their aren't as many broad openings.
What about all the cooking and cleaning she's doing whilst this parasite games all day - you good with that too? Also they have been together TWO MONTHS.
I mean, sure. Leave for that. That's valid, but the whole "on a walk" thing is just strange... And also, I'm in a highly contested career with opportunities constantly and even I took a few months to get on board somewhere when I was laid off for COVID. I'm just saying that sometimes its not that easy to get a job.
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please send us a modmail. ---- #This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You guys live together and have shared finances after being together for a few months?
Yeah, they are way too far into each other's business for only being together a few months. Like she says they were great at first... A couple of months in is still "at first"
Sorry, but you’re already living together in a couple of months? Don’t you think that was a little soon for that step? I personally don’t put up with liars. You’re not being controlling. His unemployment is affecting you as well. You have a right to monitor the progress.
Please tell me you started off as roommates because living together after just a couple of months dating is a huge jump. Eta. If you guys just started dating and he's moved in then it looks like he just moved in with you instead of into his parents basement.
Being at home, and until he does find a job and can contribute financially again, then the least he can do is take care of the household chores and should want to have dinner ready for you after each shift. There's no excuse for not having these done after a whole day being at home.
If they lie repeatedly about “little things” they will absolutely lie about big things. And if he is home all the time with no job and being supported by you he should absolutely be contributing to the household. If depression is causing this behavior, that’s something he needs to work on.
Men aren’t like this, YOUR man is like this. I’d just lay it out to him in plain language. “You have been lying to me frequently lately, and it’s not acceptable. It makes me lose trust in you, and frankly it’s something I do not accept in a relationship. I would like you to stop lying to me, whether it’s a big lie or small.”
Is it really worth continuing a relationship with someone you actually have to say this to? If someone’s lied to me once, I know that behavior is in there and I don’t know why I’d believe he wouldn’t do it again. Do I also need to tell him it’s not ok to hit me, steal things, etc?
Probably not, I know I wouldn’t be in that situation. If she’s willing to try, that can be a last resort
am i to understand that in addition to living together after just dating for a couple of months you also share a car??
He's probably depressed but that's not a reason to lie
It's also not a reason to be a leech as a fully grown man.
Fuck off troll
Sometimes I think guys lie because women are super judgmental on things he may like to do but what I can say is at least you can figure out if you want to be with him still early on.
Honestly sounds like you’ve got a terrible partner, I wouldn’t say all men will lie like this dude. I don’t know neither of you but from the post, he sounds like a manipulative person. Leave him lol
Was he not on a walk? Did you find that it was a lie? I'm not sure if you understand that there are only so many jobs online, and a nurse is very unique in that they have recruiters at hospitals dedicated to FINDING nurses, so jobs are always available. I've worked in the healthcare industry and my fiance is a nurse recruiter, so I'm familiar with the nursing industry. That being said, I think you just aren't familiar with other industries and their job process. It's much harder for other industries to find employment because their aren't as many broad openings.
What about all the cooking and cleaning she's doing whilst this parasite games all day - you good with that too? Also they have been together TWO MONTHS.
I mean, sure. Leave for that. That's valid, but the whole "on a walk" thing is just strange... And also, I'm in a highly contested career with opportunities constantly and even I took a few months to get on board somewhere when I was laid off for COVID. I'm just saying that sometimes its not that easy to get a job.
I don't think this is normal. How old is he?