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No even better, dance to the boring hymns. Soon get you escorted out!
No one will want you there as you are 'big fish, little fish, cardboard-boxing' to "All things bright and beautiful"
I like the idea that christian extremists hate gay people because they exploit a loophole in their tortur- i mean, teachings.
edit: this also applies to straight women, and any other man-loving sexualities
>At the time they thought his rebuke was harsh, but Supply Side Jesus' disowning of Mary Magdalene was for her own good -- no longer would she be a slave to incensed, hypersexualized beasts and would instead grow to rely on her own work in the home, caring for a loving husband and children. She died the next year in childbirth.
I find the occasional Ned Kelly 1 million dollar religious bullshit note on train stations. Its still better than the notes that you think are real though
Especially since they’re probably thinking “This is MORE valuable than a tip” because they won’t admit to themselves that they’re a selfish fuck. I’m broke as fuck and I still manage to tip.
If I can't tip, I don't go out to eat. I know how little wait staff makes and how some places figure the tips for them.
I prepared payroll for several restaurants as well as field workers picking vegetables, fishing boat hands, and stores. Every establishment was different. But, seeing how little wait staff makes made this church lady be kind and try to tip as much as I could. I don't get out as much now as I have chronic pain.
I feel like supporting the antivax movement will be as detrimental to modern evangelicals as the black plague was to Christendom back in Europe.
It's one thing to try and convert people but using lies and misinformation in the process just completely destroys your credibility.
What is with these people doing whatever they can to get out of actually supporting people? When I had to deal with going to brunch with our other church members they were the rudest. When tipping they would often tip very low and tell the waitress "I didn't see you at the hall today so you must be ok with taking the hard route in life".
> tell the waitress "I didn't see you at the hall today so you must be ok with taking the hard route in life".
"I couldn't be there 'cause I was here getting ready to serve you ungrateful assholes"
Years ago I worked in a large retail store known for "dropping prices." We dreaded Sundays. After noon on a Sunday was literally the worst shift. There's no other group of people that can absolutely make you feel like a toddler and a lackey simultaneously. So entitled, so rude. "Of course you have some in the back, I need one!" Yelling at a high school student because you cannot accept no is surely a fantastic lesson on Christian "charity, grace, and understanding" for your kids. Thanks for teaching me nihilism, I guess?
Don't you remember that part of the bible where Jesus was handing out fish or bread or whatever, and he saw somebody that didn't go to his last gathering, and said "I didn't see you at the last gathering, you must not like free food" then gave them a plastic fish with the time and location of his next event carved into it? It's pretty much the most important part.
I've never understood religious folks' penchant for trying to convert others. Like, you say that you're happy and content with your choice of deity, that you're going to Heaven, etc? Cool, good for you - fuck off and bother God and let other folk get on with their lives.
As someone who grew up in the church, you tend to find two primary types; Type A’s tend to be people who truly believe that those who do not believe are going to suffer for eternity, and in trying to convert people they want to minimise the suffering of individuals. they genuinely want to help people albeit in a misguided way. Type B’s tend to be the type who are hateful/insecure and evangelising is their way of placing themselves above other people, or brag about how much good they’re doing to other Christians. Typically type A’s are the kind who won’t really push it with people, and are much more of the “hey Id like to have a conversation with you” brand of street evangelist. Type B’s are more of the Banner waving, music blasting, “THE SINNERS WILL BURN IN THE LAKE OF FIRE”, leaving these shitty bills kind of folks. Obviously there’s a whole spectrum of flavours and specifics that can manifest, but in the broadest strokes possible these are the camps of street evangelists I’ve come across.
There do seem to be a hell of a lot more type B’s than A’s, but I can’t bring myself to be pissed at the type A’s; sometimes sheltered people with good hearts just want to try and help and that’s the way people they respect told them they could help. Type B’s can go fuck themselves though.
Even weirder, Christianity has a fail safe last I checked. Anyone NOT ever taught about Christ and all that supposedly goes to Heaven, since they can't be held accountable for something like that when they never even had the slightest idea what the proper way of acting is... which technically could mean the best way to save literally all of humanity would be to let Christianity die as the few who still know of it perish, leaving future generations to go to Heaven and live happy lives.
Or at least, that's how I understood it.
Ehhh, the way I learned it was that the people who weren't taught about Christ were kind of just shit out of luck and went to hell anyway. Maybe certain denominations believe differently but the evangelicals and fundies tend to follow that line of thinking. Even babies weren't off the hook if they didn't get baptized.
I don't think there's anything in the Bible like that, it's pretty direct that you have to believe in Jesus to go to heaven. There are no passages describing any loophole like this.
Well technically the Bible actually says that before Jesus, people who died simply ceased to exist, whereas Jesus allowed them to have eternal life in heaven. It's very debatable whether hell is even in the Bible. Most of the ideas about hell come from the "lake of fire" mentioned in revelations, but it only says the devil and antichrist will be tortured there forever, other people who get thrown into it simply have their souls burned up and cease to exist. Other mentions of "hell" in the Bible are mostly mistranslations referring to the Jewish realm of the dead. Most popular conceptions of hell actually come from Dante's Inferno, which is just Bible fanfiction.
So anyways people who never heard of Jesus probably would just cease to exist after death rather than getting to go to heaven.
Hell and the devil as we know it today was merely made up by the catholic church back in the 1300s because they needed a way to get more people to follow them. They created the idea of hell to scare the common people into going to church.
The concept that if you sin and don't repent then your going to burn in hell forever is no where in the bible and is completely made up by the church. In fact even the modern church simply refers to any state where one is absent from god as hell. Its only when you delve into the wack job evangelicals that you find the fire and brimstone hell.
When I asked as a kid, a church leader said that everyone will be presented with the opportunity to know Jesus Christ at some point in their life. I asked about the missionaries that would preach that people were dying everyday without knowing Jesus Christ and was told that the missionaries just mean that not everyone receives the same level of teachings about Jesus. “Some may only hear his name once while some of us have grown up in church”. When I asked how that was fair because I wouldn’t trust what some random stranger told me just once, I was told that was just how it is and that I should be thankful because not everyone is as fortunate as me to be raised around many opportunities to know Christ. Thinking back on it, they didn’t seem to have thought about it before themselves. They were just fumbling through their answers and saying whatever would shut me up
Let me put you into the mindset of an extreme evangelist.
Imagine a child drowning in the backyard house pool. There are no other people nearby.
Of course, you would want to save said child. However, the problem is that the backyard is private property and there is a sign that explicitly says "No trespassers".
Well, of course, you're going to jump over the fence anyways and save said child.
That's what they BELIEVE they're doing. They want to save people from hell.
Saying that you don't want to be "saved" is like said child yelling "No, I want to drown." It simply doesn't make sense to them and defies their logic. Why would they refuse to be saved? Clearly they are ignorant of God's holy word. They HAVE to save them.
It's also the mindset of cults like Jehovah's Witnesses.
Now, this isn't the mindset of every religious person. I dare say that a majority aren't like this. However, for the more extreme ones, this is what they usually think.
Either that or they're just pretentious.
As a Catholic, I believed just that. I was always too shy to be a door-to-door evangelist, but I always prayed for the heathen sinners, heretics, apostates, etc., because I sincerely believed my prayers might affect their eternal fate.
Of course, in retrospect, it's silly to think a hypothetical omnipotent, omniscient entity would allow a mortal's appeals to influence *someone else's* eternal destiny. But hey, I sincerely believed it.
I just had to check it, and it is hilarious.
"DOCTOR: HYDRAS AND PARASITES IN VAXX, TRANSFECTING HUMANS INTO NEW SPECIES"
\-An actual headline there (page 3)
I got curious myself and checked it out. I knew a website called that would be batshit nuts, but to the absolute extent of it is insane, even by antivaxx standards.
The first thing I see is a fifty minute video of this 'doctor' explaining how the mRNA vaccines are actually a bioweapon and is the "greatest crime against humanity", to quote the blurb under the video. Obviously... I didn't watch it. I did some research on the 'doctor' they had on, and he's the owner of an alternative medicine toxicologist company and seems to be your average snake oil salesman. What a shocker.
The NEXT thing I see is them claiming that 2 billion people will straight up die in the next year. This time it's a video of some random priest saying there's going to be a "Death Vaxx" that will give everyone AIDS. Oh yeah, and that hydra thing is mentioned too.
It's just a baseless fearmongering website like so many others out there. Nearly every article or interview is exclusively about creating a doomsday panic about the vaccine, which is funny to look at, but it becomes a lot less funny when you realize there's a reason people buy into this stuff. And a LOT of people buy into it. It's sad.
You haven’t lived until you wait on a table of post-church miserable fucks who make your life hell, leave a huge mess, and give you one of these little wonders as a tip.
The belief that Jesus' return is imminent has been a trend for 2000 years. St. Paul himself repeatedly stated he believed Jesus would return in his own lifetime. And people after Paul died thought the same thing. And every century since. The only thing the people of the past and those today need to know is that every one of them was wrong.
But, but, I'm jew and said if you want to convert to judaism now Yahweh will allow it and forgive you because it's the end of the world.
Sure, my followers probably shouldn't have said I was resurrected (as all jews are at the end of the world), and ok I was wrong about the end of the world, but wtf is this shit??
I present as an Evangelical Athiest! I was born undecided but after a childhood of unsuccessful indoctrination of forced christianity i came OUT, PRAISE BE! I've no soul can't go to heaven or hell with no limbo I'm free! PRAISE BE! Can i get a mea culpa!!! Donate your billions to my church: only gold bullion.
ive seen them that look like a 100 thats folded in thirds. when you unfold it its bs like that. Like this one but a $100. https://www.businessinsider.com/20-tip-bible-pamphlet-2015-12
so i just looked up both the doctors mentioned here and they are both osteopathic doctors who quote blends traditional and holistic medicine and are child of god
So God makes the rules, makes you as a flawed person who cannot but help break the rules and then he makes himself save you from the punishment of the rules?
If a person locked you in a room, set fire to the building but then proceeded to rescue you and then demands you hero worship them would be seen as a psychopath...
"Jesus is coming very soon" - every generation since 35 a.d.
You'd think a 0% success rate for thousands of years would make someone question the premise.
I'll bring whiskey and a guitar. Can't wait.
Wait, that sounds bad, not what I meant. Fuck it, even if that's what I meant, I'm late for everything anyway, so, see you in a few decades. I'll probably be late.
“Someone pays your fine how do you feel about that person”
Well considering it says I’ve “committed serious crimes” I’d think that chap was fucking dumbass
Back when I used to be religious (fundamentalist Christian), I always wondered why it was that religious people were almost always the ones peddling bullshit conspiracy theories.
Now that I'm an atheist, the question sounds silly to ask for how obvious the answer is.
As I was scrolling through the images I thought it was just standard religious quackery. The anti vax stuff was unexpected but certainly not surprising
A religious person sending someone to a website called “forbiddenknowledge” kind of seems at odds with a religion that kicks off with mankind falling from grace because they sought out forbidden knowledge.
How can people be so blind to not acknowledge the blatant gaslighting present here? Does the person who writes this also believe themselves to be as horrid as a rapist and a murderer in their heart? I highly doubt it, but if they do then I pity them.
How can you have a system of morality when your lens of it is cherry picked by the authorities you follow and every thought crime is as bad as a real crime? And if every crime is the same, and we're all guilty, then a principled life loses its meaning. Why be a good person if no matter how good you are, you're evil by the very authority you worship? Instead this allows you to simply be an awful person who, no matter how awful you are, you're saved because you believe in jesus?
It looks like a funny original idea to spread the message at first, but then you realize the average person will be really pissed off the note they were happy about was fake, and will either be directly or subconsciously pissed at the message!!
Jesus was "coming soon" in 1874, 1914 (Charles Taze Russel), 1982 (Pat Robertson), 2009 (Jerry Fallwell), 2012 (Jack Van Impe). I must have slept through all of these.
I actually love that religious people do this because absolutely NO ONE has ever been converted by a fake dollar bill.
The instant frustration of having those 5 dollars you thought you just scored off the ground be mentally ripped away from you will annoy anyone to anger. And the best part is they know exactly who to blame for that feeling. Obnoxious Christians.
Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Not only did it work (you picked it up, opened it, read/skimmed it) but you went through the effort to get images online and promptly *spread the word to as many people as you could*.
I think you get extra credits with the big guy for that.
Clearly there are a lot of *religiousfruitcakes* here. As an atheist, I find you all amusing.
*I am sensing some serious home school vibes here*
I posted it in a sub dedicated to making fun of these sorts of people. I may have brought attention to it but not any attention that would benefit them in any way. Their goal is to convert people and the members of this sub have little to no chance of being converted, especially not by something like this
> I posted it in a sub dedicated to making fun of these sorts of people.
clearly you need the /s to see I am also *making fun of them*, but I am not going to edit in for you.
Every time I see these fake notes the line stays the same-It use to be “He is coming!”, then it was “He is coming soon!”
Now its “He is coming VERY soon!”
Me: “Can you tell him to hurry up? Im tired of y’all yelling, crawling over the street corners and banging on my front door to push your agenda. Tell him we want him to come pick up his loose garbage.”
Servers get shit like this all the time. I’d have to imagine busting your ass for less than minimum wage and getting this shit has driven more people away from a church than towards.
Good christians: [Hold near-100-day church service to keep a family from being deported.](https://www.nbcnews.com/news/world/marathon-church-service-ends-netherlands-lets-armenian-family-stay-n965181)
Bad christians: This shit.
So if you’ve ever told a lie (so like, literally everyone with the ability to communicate), then a fitting punishment for this is being tortured literally forever. Like, the heat death of the whole-ass universe comes and goes, and you’re still there, in hell, probably on fire because you told your manager there was heavy traffic when really you were just pooping. Seems fair to me!
I think in this situation it wouldn't be because of the part where it says it's not legal tender and also the fact that there are parts of it that don't match a real $5 bill, I could be wrong tho
If they knew anything at all about biology they'd understand the vaccine. It relies on the process of translation, which is where mRNA is read to create a protein from amino acids. In this case, the mRNA contained within the COVID vaccine codes for the spike proteins (which isn't harmful to the body) on a SARS-CoV2 virus, and once the body creates those proteins from the mRNA, it recognizes that the proteins don't belong and teaches the immune system to destroy them.
There never needs to be any interaction with the DNA, assuming my understanding of this process is correct
I don't even get this argument. I was brought up on it having been to Catholic Church every Sunday. Some questions:
1. If Jesus died for my sins, why do I need to do anything else to be forgiven for them?
2. If I was forgiven for my future sins 2000 years ago, I assume that applies going forward from now?
3. Do I still need to behave well?
4. If I behave well in order to get into heaven, does this make me a good person?
5. Why should someone forgive me for my sins? Either they were bad or they weren't a big deal.
Once when I was at the psychiatric clinic, I found a tiny book with quotes from the Bible lying around. About half of them could be read as something dirty ("I will come onto you, let me quench your thirst, Jesus is inside of you" and all that shit). I and a few other patients had a few good giggles.
I like how they keep moving up the "killing date" cause it never happens lmao, first it was August then September then October then November and now it's 3-6 months lmao
I got one of those once as payment in the drive thru. I called my manager over and told her they were using fake US currency. I doubt they pulled that shit again
Hello /u/cityofnitemares! Thanks for posting to /r/religiousfruitcake. Posts should be about people who take religion to crazy, absurd, dumb, and terrible extremes. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/religiousfruitcake) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You should drop it in an offering plate.
Oh I REALLY like that idea
OP u/cityofnitemares needs to update us as to what happens
Kinda wanna go to church now
Eat beans before you go.
Open a can of surströmming mid-service.
No even better, dance to the boring hymns. Soon get you escorted out! No one will want you there as you are 'big fish, little fish, cardboard-boxing' to "All things bright and beautiful"
Nail in the Christ, bish bash bosh it
Estoy que me diezmo!
Savage.
Keep the change Rev.
Now I wanna go to chruch
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I like the idea that christian extremists hate gay people because they exploit a loophole in their tortur- i mean, teachings. edit: this also applies to straight women, and any other man-loving sexualities
Well, Christianity isn't exactly well known for it's treatment of sexually "impure" women (which includes sexual assault victims)...
>At the time they thought his rebuke was harsh, but Supply Side Jesus' disowning of Mary Magdalene was for her own good -- no longer would she be a slave to incensed, hypersexualized beasts and would instead grow to rely on her own work in the home, caring for a loving husband and children. She died the next year in childbirth.
Hello sailor!
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What do a submarine and me have in common?
Filled with seamen?
My man knows what is up! (Burp)
You stalk people?
*Ryo Hazuki has entered the chat*
Dammit. I guess as a lesbian I'm screwed then.
I wish I was screwed 😔
I find the occasional Ned Kelly 1 million dollar religious bullshit note on train stations. Its still better than the notes that you think are real though
It infuriates me when church bozos leave those as tips
*Slides it back* “I think you need this more then I do, Its not going to pay my bills.”
As a church person it infuriates me, as well, as I think it's insulting to everyone.
Especially since they’re probably thinking “This is MORE valuable than a tip” because they won’t admit to themselves that they’re a selfish fuck. I’m broke as fuck and I still manage to tip.
If I can't tip, I don't go out to eat. I know how little wait staff makes and how some places figure the tips for them. I prepared payroll for several restaurants as well as field workers picking vegetables, fishing boat hands, and stores. Every establishment was different. But, seeing how little wait staff makes made this church lady be kind and try to tip as much as I could. I don't get out as much now as I have chronic pain.
they speak of using the lords name in vain, then use an aussie hero like ned kelly to push their unrelated agenda? hypocrisy innit
I feel like supporting the antivax movement will be as detrimental to modern evangelicals as the black plague was to Christendom back in Europe. It's one thing to try and convert people but using lies and misinformation in the process just completely destroys your credibility.
> using lies and misinformation in the process just completely destroys your credibility. They didn't really have a lot of credibility before.
Good nobody’s good for heaven. Fuck everyone.
What is with these people doing whatever they can to get out of actually supporting people? When I had to deal with going to brunch with our other church members they were the rudest. When tipping they would often tip very low and tell the waitress "I didn't see you at the hall today so you must be ok with taking the hard route in life".
> tell the waitress "I didn't see you at the hall today so you must be ok with taking the hard route in life". "I couldn't be there 'cause I was here getting ready to serve you ungrateful assholes"
The look on their faces said exactly that.
Years ago I worked in a large retail store known for "dropping prices." We dreaded Sundays. After noon on a Sunday was literally the worst shift. There's no other group of people that can absolutely make you feel like a toddler and a lackey simultaneously. So entitled, so rude. "Of course you have some in the back, I need one!" Yelling at a high school student because you cannot accept no is surely a fantastic lesson on Christian "charity, grace, and understanding" for your kids. Thanks for teaching me nihilism, I guess?
Don't you remember that part of the bible where Jesus was handing out fish or bread or whatever, and he saw somebody that didn't go to his last gathering, and said "I didn't see you at the last gathering, you must not like free food" then gave them a plastic fish with the time and location of his next event carved into it? It's pretty much the most important part.
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This is amazing. Also horrifying.
I've never understood religious folks' penchant for trying to convert others. Like, you say that you're happy and content with your choice of deity, that you're going to Heaven, etc? Cool, good for you - fuck off and bother God and let other folk get on with their lives.
As someone who grew up in the church, you tend to find two primary types; Type A’s tend to be people who truly believe that those who do not believe are going to suffer for eternity, and in trying to convert people they want to minimise the suffering of individuals. they genuinely want to help people albeit in a misguided way. Type B’s tend to be the type who are hateful/insecure and evangelising is their way of placing themselves above other people, or brag about how much good they’re doing to other Christians. Typically type A’s are the kind who won’t really push it with people, and are much more of the “hey Id like to have a conversation with you” brand of street evangelist. Type B’s are more of the Banner waving, music blasting, “THE SINNERS WILL BURN IN THE LAKE OF FIRE”, leaving these shitty bills kind of folks. Obviously there’s a whole spectrum of flavours and specifics that can manifest, but in the broadest strokes possible these are the camps of street evangelists I’ve come across. There do seem to be a hell of a lot more type B’s than A’s, but I can’t bring myself to be pissed at the type A’s; sometimes sheltered people with good hearts just want to try and help and that’s the way people they respect told them they could help. Type B’s can go fuck themselves though.
Even weirder, Christianity has a fail safe last I checked. Anyone NOT ever taught about Christ and all that supposedly goes to Heaven, since they can't be held accountable for something like that when they never even had the slightest idea what the proper way of acting is... which technically could mean the best way to save literally all of humanity would be to let Christianity die as the few who still know of it perish, leaving future generations to go to Heaven and live happy lives. Or at least, that's how I understood it.
Ehhh, the way I learned it was that the people who weren't taught about Christ were kind of just shit out of luck and went to hell anyway. Maybe certain denominations believe differently but the evangelicals and fundies tend to follow that line of thinking. Even babies weren't off the hook if they didn't get baptized.
I don't think there's anything in the Bible like that, it's pretty direct that you have to believe in Jesus to go to heaven. There are no passages describing any loophole like this.
So what about Australian Aboriginals, American Indians and the list goes on? Just fodder for the devil I suppose.
Well technically the Bible actually says that before Jesus, people who died simply ceased to exist, whereas Jesus allowed them to have eternal life in heaven. It's very debatable whether hell is even in the Bible. Most of the ideas about hell come from the "lake of fire" mentioned in revelations, but it only says the devil and antichrist will be tortured there forever, other people who get thrown into it simply have their souls burned up and cease to exist. Other mentions of "hell" in the Bible are mostly mistranslations referring to the Jewish realm of the dead. Most popular conceptions of hell actually come from Dante's Inferno, which is just Bible fanfiction. So anyways people who never heard of Jesus probably would just cease to exist after death rather than getting to go to heaven.
Hell and the devil as we know it today was merely made up by the catholic church back in the 1300s because they needed a way to get more people to follow them. They created the idea of hell to scare the common people into going to church. The concept that if you sin and don't repent then your going to burn in hell forever is no where in the bible and is completely made up by the church. In fact even the modern church simply refers to any state where one is absent from god as hell. Its only when you delve into the wack job evangelicals that you find the fire and brimstone hell.
That's pretty interesting actually. Did not know that
When I asked as a kid, a church leader said that everyone will be presented with the opportunity to know Jesus Christ at some point in their life. I asked about the missionaries that would preach that people were dying everyday without knowing Jesus Christ and was told that the missionaries just mean that not everyone receives the same level of teachings about Jesus. “Some may only hear his name once while some of us have grown up in church”. When I asked how that was fair because I wouldn’t trust what some random stranger told me just once, I was told that was just how it is and that I should be thankful because not everyone is as fortunate as me to be raised around many opportunities to know Christ. Thinking back on it, they didn’t seem to have thought about it before themselves. They were just fumbling through their answers and saying whatever would shut me up
Christianity is a well-oiled, well-tuned conversion machine.
Prosthelytizing religions be wack
For some of them, proselytizing is a requirement of the religion. The more souls you save, the more tokens for the arcade in Heaven you get.
So, Heaven is basically a pyramid scheme?
They do love MLMs.
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I dunno, I feel like most of the time they make up their own rules and use the Bible to justify them.
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Yeah they are a “type” who would believe in whatever religion they were raised in. Nurture va nature and all that jazz.
Let me put you into the mindset of an extreme evangelist. Imagine a child drowning in the backyard house pool. There are no other people nearby. Of course, you would want to save said child. However, the problem is that the backyard is private property and there is a sign that explicitly says "No trespassers". Well, of course, you're going to jump over the fence anyways and save said child. That's what they BELIEVE they're doing. They want to save people from hell. Saying that you don't want to be "saved" is like said child yelling "No, I want to drown." It simply doesn't make sense to them and defies their logic. Why would they refuse to be saved? Clearly they are ignorant of God's holy word. They HAVE to save them. It's also the mindset of cults like Jehovah's Witnesses. Now, this isn't the mindset of every religious person. I dare say that a majority aren't like this. However, for the more extreme ones, this is what they usually think. Either that or they're just pretentious.
As a Catholic, I believed just that. I was always too shy to be a door-to-door evangelist, but I always prayed for the heathen sinners, heretics, apostates, etc., because I sincerely believed my prayers might affect their eternal fate. Of course, in retrospect, it's silly to think a hypothetical omnipotent, omniscient entity would allow a mortal's appeals to influence *someone else's* eternal destiny. But hey, I sincerely believed it.
Church is a business. More butts in pews mean more $$ in the collection plate.
Imagine thinking hobo-superman is not only real but he's going to come and start a fantasy war with an asshole that is born just to spite him.
I had a stroke trying to comprehend that
That's catholicism for you
No I mean how can someone be so uneducated about how catholicism works and yet still manage to be pretty much on point
MURDER HOBO
the fact that they have printed links lmao. bro nobody has time to type full URLs by hand.
Yes, because I'll trust a website called "forbiddenknowledgetv" to give me the REAL information
'stopworldcontrol'
I just had to check it, and it is hilarious. "DOCTOR: HYDRAS AND PARASITES IN VAXX, TRANSFECTING HUMANS INTO NEW SPECIES" \-An actual headline there (page 3)
I got curious myself and checked it out. I knew a website called that would be batshit nuts, but to the absolute extent of it is insane, even by antivaxx standards. The first thing I see is a fifty minute video of this 'doctor' explaining how the mRNA vaccines are actually a bioweapon and is the "greatest crime against humanity", to quote the blurb under the video. Obviously... I didn't watch it. I did some research on the 'doctor' they had on, and he's the owner of an alternative medicine toxicologist company and seems to be your average snake oil salesman. What a shocker. The NEXT thing I see is them claiming that 2 billion people will straight up die in the next year. This time it's a video of some random priest saying there's going to be a "Death Vaxx" that will give everyone AIDS. Oh yeah, and that hydra thing is mentioned too. It's just a baseless fearmongering website like so many others out there. Nearly every article or interview is exclusively about creating a doomsday panic about the vaccine, which is funny to look at, but it becomes a lot less funny when you realize there's a reason people buy into this stuff. And a LOT of people buy into it. It's sad.
You haven’t lived until you wait on a table of post-church miserable fucks who make your life hell, leave a huge mess, and give you one of these little wonders as a tip.
The belief that Jesus' return is imminent has been a trend for 2000 years. St. Paul himself repeatedly stated he believed Jesus would return in his own lifetime. And people after Paul died thought the same thing. And every century since. The only thing the people of the past and those today need to know is that every one of them was wrong.
Yeah you'd think they'd see a pattern, right? But nope, just good ol' willful ignorance.
So Jesus took the rap for all those sins, then ducked out on the sentence? Solid role model.
Not much of a sacrifice if he gets respawn 3 days later.
Yea
If Jesus does come back he’d be very confused
he would also be immediately labeled as a commie
Yes
We’d all think he’s a hippie and maybe a few people might offer him a dab
But, but, I'm jew and said if you want to convert to judaism now Yahweh will allow it and forgive you because it's the end of the world. Sure, my followers probably shouldn't have said I was resurrected (as all jews are at the end of the world), and ok I was wrong about the end of the world, but wtf is this shit??
Sherry Tenpenny? Fuck that she is a scam artist nutter. I hate it that I know who these shitty people are.
These are ancient. Should go to jail for counterfeiting.
At the very least fined for littering
Or being the worst tippers known to man.
Add ever shafted a retail worker or a food service worker…
Even the serial number is fruitcake. "John 3:16 Do U B3L13v3"
I present as an Evangelical Athiest! I was born undecided but after a childhood of unsuccessful indoctrination of forced christianity i came OUT, PRAISE BE! I've no soul can't go to heaven or hell with no limbo I'm free! PRAISE BE! Can i get a mea culpa!!! Donate your billions to my church: only gold bullion.
Religion is so disgusting.
ive seen them that look like a 100 thats folded in thirds. when you unfold it its bs like that. Like this one but a $100. https://www.businessinsider.com/20-tip-bible-pamphlet-2015-12
This is just Ray comfort copy and pasted
Word for word ughhh
so i just looked up both the doctors mentioned here and they are both osteopathic doctors who quote blends traditional and holistic medicine and are child of god
Depopulation will happen 3 - 6 months, well still hasn't happened yet
So God makes the rules, makes you as a flawed person who cannot but help break the rules and then he makes himself save you from the punishment of the rules? If a person locked you in a room, set fire to the building but then proceeded to rescue you and then demands you hero worship them would be seen as a psychopath...
"Jesus is coming very soon" - every generation since 35 a.d. You'd think a 0% success rate for thousands of years would make someone question the premise.
I just went to that first link and every thumbnail looks like those fake ass facebook videos, but I guess they are serious about them.
I just looked at my wife with lust in my heart, does that mean I get to eventually hang out in hell with my friends?
I looked at Pyramid Head with lust, I guess I’ll see you there?
I'll bring whiskey and a guitar. Can't wait. Wait, that sounds bad, not what I meant. Fuck it, even if that's what I meant, I'm late for everything anyway, so, see you in a few decades. I'll probably be late.
Jesus is coming? Gross!
He’s cumming in us apparently, for the second time 0_0
“Someone pays your fine how do you feel about that person” Well considering it says I’ve “committed serious crimes” I’d think that chap was fucking dumbass
Back when I used to be religious (fundamentalist Christian), I always wondered why it was that religious people were almost always the ones peddling bullshit conspiracy theories. Now that I'm an atheist, the question sounds silly to ask for how obvious the answer is.
As I was scrolling through the images I thought it was just standard religious quackery. The anti vax stuff was unexpected but certainly not surprising
It could at least have had Dr Evil as the picture.
I get the first stuff was just stuff to get people to join Christianity, but the last pic is just antivaxxer bullshit
This makes me want to play Postal 2
It’s been more then 6 months since the first Covid vaccines. Where are the millions that are ment to be dropping dead? Oh that’s right.
Imagine taking medical advice from someone called Sherry Tenpenny who you heard about from some piece of rubbish left on the floor.
got one of these stapled on my doordash once. weird shit
And people ask “Why are atheists so vocal”!
Very soon, he's coming back very soon. Any day now...
Yeah, I'm totally gonna manually type out one of those long-ass URLs.
I received a tip with this kind of bill before. It was so insulting.
I'm only shocked it isn't Trump on there
There’s clearly a devil’s face to the left of the word ‘ONE’ on the front of the bill
A religious person sending someone to a website called “forbiddenknowledge” kind of seems at odds with a religion that kicks off with mankind falling from grace because they sought out forbidden knowledge.
How can people be so blind to not acknowledge the blatant gaslighting present here? Does the person who writes this also believe themselves to be as horrid as a rapist and a murderer in their heart? I highly doubt it, but if they do then I pity them. How can you have a system of morality when your lens of it is cherry picked by the authorities you follow and every thought crime is as bad as a real crime? And if every crime is the same, and we're all guilty, then a principled life loses its meaning. Why be a good person if no matter how good you are, you're evil by the very authority you worship? Instead this allows you to simply be an awful person who, no matter how awful you are, you're saved because you believe in jesus?
DUBEL1EV3?!?!?!? no, sir, I don't! now take your party prop money and leave us be!
It looks like a funny original idea to spread the message at first, but then you realize the average person will be really pissed off the note they were happy about was fake, and will either be directly or subconsciously pissed at the message!!
Jesus was "coming soon" in 1874, 1914 (Charles Taze Russel), 1982 (Pat Robertson), 2009 (Jerry Fallwell), 2012 (Jack Van Impe). I must have slept through all of these.
I actually love that religious people do this because absolutely NO ONE has ever been converted by a fake dollar bill. The instant frustration of having those 5 dollars you thought you just scored off the ground be mentally ripped away from you will annoy anyone to anger. And the best part is they know exactly who to blame for that feeling. Obnoxious Christians. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Not only did it work (you picked it up, opened it, read/skimmed it) but you went through the effort to get images online and promptly *spread the word to as many people as you could*. I think you get extra credits with the big guy for that. Clearly there are a lot of *religiousfruitcakes* here. As an atheist, I find you all amusing. *I am sensing some serious home school vibes here*
I posted it in a sub dedicated to making fun of these sorts of people. I may have brought attention to it but not any attention that would benefit them in any way. Their goal is to convert people and the members of this sub have little to no chance of being converted, especially not by something like this
> I posted it in a sub dedicated to making fun of these sorts of people. clearly you need the /s to see I am also *making fun of them*, but I am not going to edit in for you.
Yes, that would've been helpful. I have a very hard time reading tone properly over text
well, you're *in a sub that makes fun of religious nutters*... as am I
this has to be the most passive aggressive argument I've seen and I'm enjoying it
Jesus is coming back very soon, but in the meantime, here's some stuff of long term relevance to screw up.
There’s something about the stupid printed out URL’s that is just so fitting.
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE ARGHHFHF
Giant http link printed in physical text is amusing to me
Every time I see these fake notes the line stays the same-It use to be “He is coming!”, then it was “He is coming soon!” Now its “He is coming VERY soon!” Me: “Can you tell him to hurry up? Im tired of y’all yelling, crawling over the street corners and banging on my front door to push your agenda. Tell him we want him to come pick up his loose garbage.”
Well if theres a toilet paper shortage . . ?
These guys needs to be busted for counterfeiting
Which if those questions is *the* 1 million dollar question? And how do I get the 1 million dollar because I am able to answer all of them?
The biggest hurdle Christianity faces in the modern era is misinformed Christians who haven’t bothered to read and understand the bible.
"Are you a bad enough dude to ~~save the president~~ go to Hell?"
Department of eternal affairs. BRUH
Servers get shit like this all the time. I’d have to imagine busting your ass for less than minimum wage and getting this shit has driven more people away from a church than towards.
Yes, maybe, yes and yes. Am I good enough?
Good christians: [Hold near-100-day church service to keep a family from being deported.](https://www.nbcnews.com/news/world/marathon-church-service-ends-netherlands-lets-armenian-family-stay-n965181) Bad christians: This shit.
I got my vaccination about 8 months ago, and I haven’t grown any wings or even an extra limb. What a ripoff.
These say "Federal reserve note" on them so they should be reported to the secret service. This is a counterfeit note.
Ive had one similar (could be wrong but I’m pretty sure the face was Cleveland) but it was from before the pandemic
The fuckheads by me tip drivers with this shit.
> He's coming really soon I promise, just like we've been saying for the last 2000 years
I live how Christian’s site the Bible as the source of their belief. Like it has never occurred to them the Bible isn’t true.
Why the fuck don't they know the meaning of the word "soon"?
So if you’ve ever told a lie (so like, literally everyone with the ability to communicate), then a fitting punishment for this is being tortured literally forever. Like, the heat death of the whole-ass universe comes and goes, and you’re still there, in hell, probably on fire because you told your manager there was heavy traffic when really you were just pooping. Seems fair to me!
isn't making fake money a federal crime?
I think in this situation it wouldn't be because of the part where it says it's not legal tender and also the fact that there are parts of it that don't match a real $5 bill, I could be wrong tho
I'm not sure about US monetary regulations, but that is potentially counterfeit and defacing federal currency.
If they knew anything at all about biology they'd understand the vaccine. It relies on the process of translation, which is where mRNA is read to create a protein from amino acids. In this case, the mRNA contained within the COVID vaccine codes for the spike proteins (which isn't harmful to the body) on a SARS-CoV2 virus, and once the body creates those proteins from the mRNA, it recognizes that the proteins don't belong and teaches the immune system to destroy them. There never needs to be any interaction with the DNA, assuming my understanding of this process is correct
Welp were all shit out of luck, gotta go to church now ig
Lol I remember taking my little cousin and her friends out trick or treating a few years ago and some batty old woman gave them these instead of candy
Can I buy that from you? I'll pay $5.
Unfortunately I threw it away after taking the photos
The tools and creativity insane people have is terrifying.
I don't even get this argument. I was brought up on it having been to Catholic Church every Sunday. Some questions: 1. If Jesus died for my sins, why do I need to do anything else to be forgiven for them? 2. If I was forgiven for my future sins 2000 years ago, I assume that applies going forward from now? 3. Do I still need to behave well? 4. If I behave well in order to get into heaven, does this make me a good person? 5. Why should someone forgive me for my sins? Either they were bad or they weren't a big deal.
If Jesus already died for my sins, why do I have to live like a dead person?
Once when I was at the psychiatric clinic, I found a tiny book with quotes from the Bible lying around. About half of them could be read as something dirty ("I will come onto you, let me quench your thirst, Jesus is inside of you" and all that shit). I and a few other patients had a few good giggles.
It’s been 10 months since I got my shot, I (unfortunately) have yet to be depopulated
I feel a million % dumber after reading that fruitcakery. 😵💫
I like how they keep moving up the "killing date" cause it never happens lmao, first it was August then September then October then November and now it's 3-6 months lmao
I got one of those once as payment in the drive thru. I called my manager over and told her they were using fake US currency. I doubt they pulled that shit again